Sillier than McHale's Navy, which was just a little PT boat commanded by Ernest Borgnine and Tim Conway. The epic tale of the USS William D. Porter, possibly the unluckiest WWII destroyer ever.

They wrecked another ship pulling out of port on their maiden voyage, which incidentally was to escort the USS Iowa carrying the President of the United States, FDR, his Secretary of State and the Joint Chiefs of Staff on their way to Yalta to meet with Churchill and Stalin.

They dropped a live depth charge by mistake, sending panic signals throughout the convoy. And if that wasn't funny enough, they fired a live torpedo at the Iowa by mistake during a drill.

The way this particular drill worked was that the Iowa would release balloons that served as targets for anti-aircraft guns. Fair enough. Until some of the balloons drifted over to the Porter and someone (Captain Walter) thought it was time for redemption. So he ordered his crew to fire on any balloons missed by the Iowa's gunners. That part went fine. Then, feeling cocky, he ordered a practice firing of their torpedoes. And the practice target would be the Iowa.

Things got so bad the Admiral in charge of the convoy ordered the Porter to detach from the convoy and sail to Bermuda. Where the entire crew was arrested.

It gets worse.

via Sean M. over at the Splitters.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 11:32 AM | Comments (48)
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One sketch knocks the hypocrisy of sportscasters for making jokes about Jeremy Lin's race while getting all pissy about similar jokes aimed at blacks, and another sketch asks what it would take for Obama to lose the black vote.

Plus goofing on Maya Angelou.

Regarding that first sketch: I agree on the hypocrisy but I think the solution here is for everyone to lighten up, not for everyone to submit further to PC.

Saturday Night Live knows well that racial jokes are funny -- since they use them themselves a lot. Oh, they don't do it in a mean way, and they often (as here) have some kind of defensible thesis they can point to, but still. If you're using them, you're not really against them.

On the other hand, the stuff with Lin seems deliberately nasty. See, e.g., this ESPN headline, now retracted and apologized for.

Get it? Get it?! Get it?!

Media workers have so much to teach the nation about racial sensitivity.

Plus, Obama as Cosby. more...

Posted by: Ace at 11:02 AM | Comments (135)
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Anybody got any good crackpot theories?

Last week, the moron horde came up with some great crackpot theories, and we even had a few real scientists show up. I thought it might be fun to see what else you guys can come up with.

How about the horizon problem? The horizon problem arises within the context of inflation theory. Inflation theory is a widely accepted part of "the big bang" cosmological model. It was created by Alan Guth, whose last name is the inspiration for--and the real acrostic for--"grand unification theory," or "GUTh." (Some people use "GUT," but they're just trying to rob Guth of his due.)

Inflation theory explains several problems with the original big bang model. First, the horizon problem: This problem states that no matter where you look in the universe, the universe is the same; it's homogeneous. The little differences you see in the cosmic microwave background (the "CMB") are called "inhomogeneities." The reason why that is a problem is because the universe is so large. Look at this picture of the CMB.

Point "A" is 14 billion light years in one direction. Point "B" is 14 billion light years in the other direction. The universe is only 14 billion years old; therefore, at the current size and rate of expansion, no information about temperature from point "A" could have made it to point "B." Point "B" is 28 billion light years away from point "A," and particles cannot travel faster than light. Thus, the "horizon" of a particle at point "A" does not include point "B"; hence, "the horizon problem." Without such communication, there can be no way for the universe to be so uniform.

Inflation theory solves this problem by postulating that there was a period of time very early in the universe when the universe expanded much faster than light, thereby carrying the information with it. Points "A" and "B" used to be very close. During that time they communicated; they were causally connected.

Look at this picture. more...

Posted by: rdbrewer at 10:01 AM | Comments (206)
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It's moving week at the CAC household. Truck rented, boxes ready, dust everywhere. While carefully packing away my bacon syrup, I stopped to reflect on our time here. It was quiet, spacious, a great place to relax. Our landlord was the best we've ever had, and always quick to respond to any issues we came across. Anything was a quick fix here. Well, almost.

We had to deal with a ghost.
After dealing with it, we have come to the same conclusion: ghosts are just assholes.

more...

Posted by: CAC at 08:32 AM | Comments (179)
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I'm afraid all you get today is a very lame open thread, fellow bookworms. Apologies. I'll try to bring my A game next week.

Posted by: Monty at 06:45 AM | Comments (217)
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Courtesy of Ilya Somin over at The Volokh Conspiracy comes a link to this very important paper by David Pimentel, a law professor at the Florida Coastal School of Law on the social and legal risks of trying to let your kids grow up like normal kids. Pimentel covers several interlocking issues, but the gist is that media hyperbole over "risks" to children, combined with vagueness in state legal statutes on child endangerment, puts parents at risk of criminal prosecution for allowing their kids to do normal things. I'll put his opening three paragraphs after the jump. more...

Posted by: Open Blogger at 06:09 PM | Comments (179)
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American's Give Record High Ratings To Several U.S. Allies. Now that isn't really surprising. However, I am surprised at the level of support Iran (pictured above), Pakistan and North Korea get. Yes, I know that some of this probably comes from ex-pats from those countries but would you really expect to get over 10% support in a random sample of 1,029 adults spread out over 50 states and D.C.? Just who are these people? more...

Posted by: CDR M at 05:55 PM | Comments (647)
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This is an open thread. Hold you dirtbags over until ONT. more...

Posted by: Open Blogger at 04:45 PM | Comments (231)
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We've got 3 candidates (not counting Uncle Crazy) that no one can agree upon sucking the life out of each other. I'm still all dead inside.

But this made me laugh.

Brought to you by the Despair.com demotivator gang, who are some pretty funny mofakus. This one says a lot about Dave in Texas.

It's important to have a purpose in life. To help others.

I'm pretty sure @jimmiebjr turned me on to this.

commenter buzzion adds his vote for SMOD.

What's your favorite Demotivator?

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 11:59 AM | Comments (445)
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I don't see how it could happen, I don't think it will happen but this? It makes you wonder. If the "establishment" starts bailing on Romney.....

A prominent Republican senator just told me that if Romney canÂ’t win in Michigan, the Republican Party needs to go back to the drawing board and convince somebody new to get into the race.

“If Romney cannot win Michigan, we need a new candidate,” said the senator, who has not endorsed anyone and requested anonymity.

The senator believes Romney will ultimately win in Michigan but says he will publicly call for the party to find a new candidate if he does not.

If sitting GOP Senators start talking about this on the record then we will be in a whole different world. It's not a world any better than the one we are in now but very, very different.

What's Romney's problem? Well mostly it's that he has so many.

“To be elected president, you have to do more than tear down your opponents,” said Ohio Attorney General Mike DeWine, a former Romney supporter who on Friday defected to the camp of former Pennsylvania senator Rick Santorum, the latest to emerge as an alternative to Romney.

“You have to give the American people a reason to vote for you — a reason to hope — a reason to believe that under your leadership, America will be better,” DeWine added. “Rick Santorum has done that. Sadly, Governor Romney has not.”

...

The candidate begins most mornings with a conference call with his two main message mavens, chief strategist Stuart Stevens and Fehrnstrom, and nearly a dozen other senior aides to discuss new lines for the candidate to try. Meanwhile, top supporters, including New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, call frequently with suggestions, while other friends and advisers e-mail him their thoughts.

All of that advice doesnÂ’t always come out cleanly, said one senior adviser, who spoke only on the condition of anonymity.

“He’s got all the pieces up there and lets the computer in his head sort out what’s going to fit into what slot at any given moment,” the adviser said.

Every candidate gets messaging advice but as we learned with the whole "I don't worry about the poor" fiasco, Romney's instincts simply aren't conservative. He really doesn't have a default ideology that he can fall back on when new things come up. He simply tries to run through his mental lists of "messages" and tries to pick the right one. Sometimes he's right but often...not so much.

Could an open convention still happen if Romney freaks everyone out by losing Michigan?

Our friend handed us a printout of FEC deadlines for ballot access, with five of them circled and starred: California (March 23), Montana (March 12), New Jersey (April 2), New Mexico (March 16) and South Dakota (March 27). The point: Even after Feb. 28, it might be possible to assemble a Hail Mary candidacy that could garner enough delegates to force a CONTESTED convention (a different nuance than BROKERED, which implies that someone is in charge).

Under RNC rules, the delegate count builds slowly: just 15% before Super Tuesday, March 6; 19% through Super Tuesday (brings you to 34%); 17% in the rest of March (brings you to 51%); with 48% in April, May and June (21%, 12%, 15%).

It's no secret around he I can't stand Romney but Santorum would be an even bigger disaster. We simply don't have any good choices this time around. And no, a hypothetical brokered convention isn't going to save us when you consider the name most often mentioned as "the savior" is Jeb Bush.

Posted by: DrewM at 08:53 AM | Comments (584)
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