Hot-tubbing it with Redford?

Prepping for that coveted appearance on Hardball?

On a three-day drunk with Byron York?

Standing on a corner somewhere cursing Lopez, Goldberg and Lowry for standing him up?

Checking out the local haberdasheries with Joe Pantoliano?

Hospitalized after a near-fatal run-in with Margaret Cho?

These are the only explanations that make any sense to me.

WuzzaDem

Posted by: Ace at 09:01 AM | Comments (7)
Post contains 66 words, total size 1 kb.

....................

Cuckling doves,
Chittering swallows,
An old man in the park
With some ducks

Who's getting the porn collection?

....................

UPDATE: An already funny haiku contest has sprung up in comments.

UPDATE: So far I nominate the following:

When the cat's away
the mice lose integrity
Call Vinnie Falcone

by LauraW

And:

Where's Ace? Hell, where's Joe?
Nobody knows who Joe is,
But Ace has conscious.

For getting a precious few more drops out of the Anka-fruit.

Though, the first entry...

Ace of Spades H.Q.
was crushed on the Sundance couch
while "casting" M. Cho

by S. Philabuster set the bar pretty high to begin with, I thought.


the UNPOPULIST

Posted by: Ace at 08:37 AM | Comments (28)
Post contains 132 words, total size 1 kb.

From the Telegraph:

Compare yesterday's reports with those by the same commentators during South Africa's first democratic election. Then, too, there were many technical problems: electors who were not properly registered, voter intimidation, long queues. But these things were set in their proper context, as the backdrop against which the moving drama of people casting their first ballots was being played out. No one suggested that the clashes between IFP and ANC supporters in Zululand undermined the whole process. No one argued that the backlash by a handful of black homeland chieftains and Boer irreconcilables made South Africa unfit for democracy.
...
No democratic election is flawless. It is human nature that the loser in any system should blame the system rather than himself: think, for example, about our own squabbles over postal voting, the West Lothian Question, or the wording of referendums. But, yesterday, Iraq became the most democratic country in the Arab world. What a pity that so many writers who, in other circumstances, are optimists about human progress, should shut their eyes to what is happening. In their determination to say "I told you so", they are coming perilously close to siding with jihadi murderers. Shame on them.

(h/t/ lucianne)

Also see here, here, and here. (Update) And here and here and here.

RealClear has more.

the UNPOPULIST

Posted by: Ace at 08:01 AM | Comments (2)
Post contains 233 words, total size 2 kb.

-Larry Kudlow slams Peggy Noonan. Read into it what you willl.

Today I don't feel like listening to realists either.

-Speaking of which, there's a pleasing new artform at the UnPo this morning: The Damning But Variations.

Soothes the bile.

-The consensus seems to be stuck at 60%.

Our turnout in '04 was 60.7. And we didn't need Chinook cover.

-Ann Coulter slams...the president?

What are you gonna do, she doesn't like soft talk.

-North Koreans are leaving North Korea.

Iron Curtain comparisons tantalize.

-And finally, dandy conservative southern novelist Tom Wolfe stokes the historicity:

SURELY some bright bulb from the Council on Foreign Relations in New York or the Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs at Princeton has already remarked that President Bush's inaugural address 10 days ago is the fourth corollary to the Monroe Doctrine. No? So many savants and not one peep out of the lot of them? Really?

Sweet.

the UNPOPULIST

Posted by: Ace at 10:40 PM | Comments (5)
Post contains 159 words, total size 2 kb.

I didn't know Ace was such a heavy drinker until he asked me to guest-blog here; he was obviously wasted. As a show of thanks, I've written a song just for Ace and all the readers here who've been so nice to me (and even one or two who apparently need to grab a dictionary and look up the word 'satire'), so here goes (sung to the tune of Bob Hope's 'Thanks for the Memories').

Thaaanks for the...

Sorry, I'm a little hoarse right now, I'll try again later.

I guess a more appropriate way of thanking Ace would be to recommend that you visit his blog - Ace of Spades HQ. Really. It's a great little blog. You should definitely check it out sometime.

Thanks to my fellow guest-bloggers from Garfield Ridge, The Unpopulist, The Urban Grind, Say Anything and Alarming News. You should visit them often. The easiest way would be to go to WuzzaDem and find them on my blogroll. AAAAAAHAHAHAHA!. How's that for shameless promotion?

If you've enjoyed anything I've posted here, please do visit my blog; WuzzaDem.com

Maybe now Ace will put me on his blogroll.

Posted by John from Wuzzadem

Posted by: Ace at 09:41 PM | Comments (8)
Post contains 206 words, total size 2 kb.

Hat Tip: The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler, via GOP Bloggers.org

In response to ten year old Shelby Dangerfield inking her index finger to show support for the Iraqi people, GOP Bloggers.org is helping out by asking bloggers and their readers to ink their index fingers tomorrow in solidarity with the Iraqis, and to email their photos to editor@gopbloggers.org

Zelda

Also posted at The Urban Grind

Posted by: Ace at 08:13 PM | Comments (5)
Post contains 73 words, total size 1 kb.

Good stuff.

the UNPOPULIST

Posted by: Ace at 07:54 PM | Comments (2)
Post contains 12 words, total size 1 kb.

Overheard during commercial breaks from today's Meet The Press interview.

FIRST BREAK

Russert
So, do you really think there could be some doubt about the legitimacy of the election in Iraq?

Kerry
Absolutely not, Tim.

Russert
But you just said there was right before the break.

Kerry
I did? Wow, I must have been on autopilot.

Posted by: Ace at 07:35 PM | Comments (3)
Post contains 118 words, total size 1 kb.

Progressive_Conscience (1,000+ posts)

I can't believe the media! All they can talk about is the "happy" Iraqis, how high turnout was, and how "freedom" has spread to Iraq. I had to turn off CNNazi because they kept focusing on the so-called "voters" and barely mentioned the brave brothers of the resistance. Where are the freedom fighters today??? Are their voices silenced because some American puppets cast a few ballots?

Positive_Femergy (742 posts)
I'm just hoping that something good will come from this. I mean, if the women of Iraq finally have the chance to cast a real vote, maybe they'll finally escape the oppression that was visited on them by Sadam's misogynist regime.

Progressive_Conscience (1,000+ posts)
Pull your head out, Femergy! Can't you see the right-wing media's complicity in this conspiracy to present the people of Iraq with a Trojan Horse they call "freedom"? Believe me, once the gates of Troy they call "polling places" have closed, the colonial invasion forces of Amerikkka will complete their imperial occupation by installing a Kapitalist puppet regime led by Cheney's cronies at Halliburton.

Young_Anarchist (157 posts)
You left out an analogy for the soldiers coming out of the horse, Progressive.

Progressive_Conscience (1,000+ posts)
Shut up, Kid.

Young_Anarchist (157 posts)
Sorry. I'm just trying to help.

Progressive_Conscience (1,000+ posts)
I've posted over a thousand times, I don't need your help.

Posted by: Ace at 06:09 PM | Comments (4)
Post contains 602 words, total size 4 kb.

Sen. Kennedy got his traitorous obscenities in three days ago.

And they are the gold standard, my friend.

the UNPOPULIST

Posted by: Ace at 05:44 PM | Comments (2)
Post contains 26 words, total size 1 kb.