"Experts."

Posted by: Ace at 02:31 PM | Comments (32)
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National Review's got 'em. Dave at Garfield Ridge's got 'em. And now so do I.

In no particular order:

The release of Spiderman 3 is beset by controversy when Sam Raimi includes a scene in which a fight between Spiderman and Hobgoblin devolves from punches, to shoves, and finally ends with five minutes of slow, deep kissing.

Buoyed by the success of his reality-denying Holocaust Conference, Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad lays plans for his “Timothy Dalton is the Definitive James Bond” conference.

Mitt RomneyÂ’s hopes for a run at the presidency are crushed when reporters reveal that, in addition to being a Mormon, he is also a centaur.

In response to falling ratings for the yearly Oscar telecast, the Academy decides to award adult films for the first time. Viewers tune in in record numbers to see who wins the trophies for categories like “Best Use of a Ball Gag in a Gay DOM/SUB Film” and “Most Convincing Portrayal of a Cheerleader’s Trip to the Equipment Room”.

Sean Hannity’s on-air domination of Alan Colmes continues with a new nightly segment entitled “Make Me a Sandwich, Alan”.

Proving that he’s still his own worst enemy, John Kerry attends a Halloween party dressed as a blackface minstrel and is caught on camera singing the racist folksong “Possum Up A Gum Tree”. He later explains the incident by saying that “such stereotypes are often revered folk heroes for many in the African-American community, and I was merely paying tribute to that.” He then adds, “And Mel Gibson was right about the Jews”. Jane Hamsher immediately rushes to explain that the costume and quotes need to be taken “in context”.

On Christmas Eve, Dick Cheney is visited by the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future. Before they can teach him any valuable moral lessons, however, he bums a twenty from them, snorts a line of blow, and sends the Ghost of Christmas Past back out to procure an underage Ukrainian prostitute and a pack of smokes for him. The other two are forced to stay and service his wife while he watches. It is generally agreed by all involved that this is the Best Christmas Ever.

Happy New Year, morons.

Posted by: AndrewR at 06:30 AM | Comments (79)
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Obviously a macabre content warning.

Posted by: Ace at 03:21 PM | Comments (81)
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Heh.

Ten year suspension for egregious cheating.

Reuters notes this means he won't face justice for any other violations he would have committed had he been playing for the next ten years, rather than being suspended.

The world mourns.

Posted by: Ace at 12:38 PM | Comments (53)
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Earth to earth; ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

See you on the flip side, buddy.

UPDATE: Most Hilarious Troll Pap Award goes to Civil Behavior:

we were winning more hearts and minds in the Middle East with our music and technology than losing them PRIOR to Baby Bush's invasion.

CB's super effective multifaceted Hearts And Minds Anti-Tyrant Action Plan, below the jump. more...

Posted by: LauraW. at 09:36 PM | Comments (394)
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Ohh, that's good, chocolatey bias, compelling and rich.

During his three decades in power, Saddam was accused of widespread oppression of political opponents and genocide against Kurds in northern Iraq. His execution means he will never face justice on those charges.

Guess he beat us, huh?

Thanks to Rodney.

Posted by: Ace at 08:11 PM | Comments (92)
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That update from FoxNews TV.

...

If you just can't wait for FoxNews, the link for streaming TV from Iraq is on the left.

Update On Streaming Video: Seems to be overwhelmed by high demand.

A US judge, by the way, just denied Saddam's lawyers' request for a stay of execution. Which was, of course, obvious.

Within the hour, they say. But they've been saying that all day.

A bit of gallows humor: As William Palmer was being led onto the gallows platform in 1856, he looked at the trapdoor and asked his executioner, "Are you sure it's safe?"

From that site of funny or odd lists.

Thanks to Axoxtl.

A Little After-Hanging Music... from Jimmy Page and Robert Plant.

Posted by: Ace at 06:18 PM | Comments (203)
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This is old, but still funny. French-Canadian bashing never gets old.

Posted by: Ace at 03:59 PM | Comments (22)
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One called "The Thumper." Twelve bills of jackhammer action.

It's a good thing.

These and other strange revelations made on the Howard Stern show.

Via PetiteDov.

Posted by: Ace at 03:09 PM | Comments (43)
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Damn, I broke my glasses last night -- like a nerd -- and I have to go get a new pair. So I'm going to miss the soothing creak of the rope.

Here's a thread to discuss it.

I haven't been this disappointed about missing a TV show since I had to rush out to get a genital-eczema cream during Constantine's rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody on American Idol.

Posted by: Ace at 01:24 PM | Comments (85)
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