Thanks to Robb, this recap of Wimbledon announcer Mary Carillo's theories about the short, compact, crafty Chinese.

Well, okay, not crafty. She didn't say that.

None of this would be all that objectionable, except the short little compact yellow maniac she was describing is 5' 8", which isn't notably short for a woman.

Posted by: Ace at 10:47 AM | Comments (23)
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An example of the old quip that mediocrities and halfwits need representation, too:

There's one company now you can sign up and you can get a movie delivered to your house daily by delivery service. Okay. And currently it comes to your house, it gets put in the mail box when you get home and you change your order but you pay for that, right.

But this service isn't going to go through the interent and what you do is you just go to a place on the internet and you order your movie and guess what you can order ten of them delivered to you and the delivery charge is free.

Ten of them streaming across that internet and what happens to your own personal internet?

I just the other day got, an internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday and I just got it yesterday. Why?

Because it got tangled up with all these things going on the internet commercially.

So you want to talk about the consumer? Let's talk about you and me. We use this internet to communicate and we aren't using it for commercial purposes.

We aren't earning anything by going on that internet. Now I'm not saying you have to or you want to discrimnate against those people [...]

The regulatory approach is wrong. Your approach is regulatory in the sense that it says "No one can charge anyone for massively invading this world of the internet". No, I'm not finished. I want people to understand my position, I'm not going to take a lot of time. [?]

They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the internet. And again, the internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck.

It's a series of tubes.

And if you don't understand those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and its going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.

The Wuzzadem Treatment: Ted Stevens' attempt to explain the mysteries of the human brain.

Posted by: Ace at 10:22 AM | Comments (69)
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The government told the New York Times Al Qaeda Intelligence Service generally about these investigations in order do demonstrate to them the importance of keeping the program secret.

Not only did the AQIS publish anyway, but they actually attempted to dig into one of the three ongoing investigations, most likely to publish details about it as well.

Posted by: Ace at 10:10 AM | Comments (45)
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As we celebrate our forefathers' wisdom in politely telling George III where to get off, remember that freedom and democracy are still in short supply in many corners of the globe. For example, down in Bolivia there are many people who are not enamored of their country becoming a thugocracy like Venezuela, or a murderous communist hellhole like Cuba.

I think time is on the side of the Bolivian freedom lovers. Why?

This is the face of the opposition:

This is Evo Morales, Mini-Me to Hugo Chavez, and current Bolivian president:

Any questions?

(credit to Publius Pundit for Morales' nickname)

Posted by: Harry Callahan at 07:35 PM | Comments (88)
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Not sure I really like many songs on this playlist, but I'm fastfowarding to the end to hear The Breeders' Saints (super-sexy song about... riding around at a country fair) and X's Fourth of July, which has been going around in my end for the past three days.

From Pajamas Media, with a July 4th roundup.

Posted by: Ace at 03:20 PM | Comments (18)
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Finally:

UK scientists have developed technology that enables artificial limbs to be directly attached to a human skeleton.

The breakthrough, developed by researchers at University College London, allows the prosthesis to breach the skin without risk of infection.

The team says early clinical trials have been "very promising".

It hopes the work - which is to be published in the Journal of Anatomy - may help survivors of the 7 July bombings, as well as other amputees.

The work paves the way for bionic limbs which are controlled by the central nervous system.

The technique, called Intraosseous Transcutaneous Amputation Prosthesis (ITAP), involves securing a titanium rod directly into the bone.

The metal implant passes through the skin and the artificial limb can be directly attached to it.

Currently, artificial limbs are fixed or strapped to an amputee's stump.

Risk of infection, which could be caused by bacteria passing from the external limb through the rod to the bone, is avoided because the skin tissue meshes around the rod to form a seal.

They studied deers' antlers to figure out how a hard object could breach the flesh without causing infection.

Posted by: Ace at 11:54 AM | Comments (22)
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FoxNews has it:

North Korea has fired two ballistic missiles, North American Aerospace Defense Command confirmed Tuesday.

Japanese public broadcasting channel NHK first reported the missile launches. Both missiles have landed in the Sea of Japan, the first about 600 kilometers from mainland Japan, NHK said.

President Bush was briefed on the activity around 4:20 p.m. EDT, shortly after the missile was launched.

Japanese government officials were trying to determine whether the missiles were Taepodong II, long-range ballistic missiles that have been sitting on a launch pad for weeks, or whether it was a different type of missile.

One U.S. government official told FOX News that if it were a Taepodong missile, it was "a real big dud."

Could have just been an earlier, shorter-range missile. These people never end with the childish provocations. It's all going to end in tears.

Not my tears. I'll be giggling like a retarded chimp loaded up on goofballs.

Thanks to RocketsBrain.

Update: CNN now claims "at least three" missiles, and at least one of them was indeed the long-range ballistic missile NK was warned against firing, according to "sources."

Posted by: Ace at 11:50 AM | Comments (41)
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But I was assured this was entirely impossible:

Doctors have their first proof that a man who was barely conscious for nearly 20 years regained speech and movement because his brain spontaneously rewired itself by growing tiny new nerve connections to replace the ones sheared apart in a car crash.

Terry Wallis, 42, is one of the few people known to have recovered so dramatically so long after a serious brain injury. He still needs help eating and cannot walk, but his speech continues to improve and he can count to 25 without interruption.

Wallis' sudden recovery happened three years ago at a rehabilitation center in Mountain View, Ark., but doctors said the same cannot be hoped for people in a persistent vegetative state, such as Terri Schiavo, the Florida woman who died last year after a fierce right-to-die court battle. Nor do they know how to make others with less serious damage, like Wallis, recover.

"Right now these cases are like winning the lottery," said Dr. Ross Zafonte, rehabilitation chief at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center, who was not involved in the research. "I wouldn't want to overenthuse family members or folks who think now we have a cure for this."

Wallis has complete amnesia about the two decades he spent barely conscious, but remembers his life before the injury.

Losing 20 years of your life in a catatonic stupor isn't fun, but there is an upside:

"He still thinks Ronald Reagan is president," his father, Jerry, said in a statement, adding that until recently his son insisted he was 20 years old.

To be 20 again, with Reagan in office. I'd hate to be the one explaining the true facts to him.

Bill from INDC Countdown... 10... 9... 8...

Posted by: Ace at 11:08 AM | Comments (40)
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With theories and everything!

MYSTERIOUS "Bigfoot" creatures said to be roaming Malaysia's jungles are probably descended from humankind's ancient African ancestor, homo erectus, an environmentalist says.

"The species probably evolved from homo erectus. It has evolved over time and is a distinct species specific to Malaysia," said Vincent Chow of the Malaysian Nature Society.

...

"It could have evolved into a new species over thousands of years," Mr Chow said. "It will revolutionise the way how we look at our origin."

On the downside, it's sad to see a country taking Bigfoot seriously. American children didn't take it all that seriously when Leonard Nimoy spun similar theories on In Search Of...

On the upside, if Muslims are willing to include sasquatches in the human family tree, pretty soon they might begin acknowleging Jews as part of it, too.

Posted by: Ace at 11:04 AM | Comments (23)
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A four year old has a "finger malfunction," so they take away his stupid apricot costume.

Personally, I think the kid was a marketing genius. Who ever even thinks of apricots? I know I don't. I think he was trying to reposition the fruit as an "outlaw" product, like Harley Davidson motorcyles.

Apricots

The bad-ass, nunchuck-flipping, whore-stomping Pimp Kings of snack-fruits that your mother always warned you about.

They should give this kid a godddamned MacArthur Genius grant, not punish him.

Thanks to Pupster. And also, sidhe.

Posted by: Ace at 10:51 AM | Comments (15)
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