For years it was supposed to be a Schwarzeneggerian vehicle. No kidding, they've been working on the dumb script to Richard Mathieson's sci-fi apolocaypse vampire story since, I'm pretty sure, forty years before the story was actually written. So many people have taken turns working on the script they actually ran out of writers and had 10,000 chimps banging randomly on typewriters for a while. (The chimps' draft was rejected, but then produced under the title Norbitt.)

The Charleton Heston flick Omega Man was based on it, I think, or an extremely litigable ripoff of it. Apocalypse, future, vampire mutants, the last man left on earth... and his missing is to kill pretty much everything else left on earth.

What's not to like?

Oh yeah: Will Smith.

Don't get me wrong; I'm a Will Smith fan. In the right genre, which is breezy, loose-limbed comedy-action (notice comedy-action, not even action-comedy).

If he's been able to pull off a star turn in a more serious action movie -- let alone a dark horror-action movie -- I'm not aware of it. (And he was only a co-star in ID4.)

I've seen Smith try a darker, deeper, richer performance in a sci-fi movie. It was called I, Robot. His performance, I mean, not the movie.

Although actually I think they also wound up calling that I, Robot too, dispensing with the original title, Blade Runner: The Retard Cut.

Thanks to Slublog.

Posted by: Ace at 04:35 PM | Comments (100)
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What the MSM tells you about the offensive.

What Michael Yon tells you about the offensive.

You make the call.

In entirely unrelated news, reporters donate 9:1 to Democrats and liberal causes over Republicans and conservative causes.

Their political affinities in no way whatsoever color their reportage.

Posted by: Ace at 04:20 PM | Comments (30)
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Funny bit from the Onion.

It sort of misses the target though, doesn't it? No investigation ever comes up with a conclusion of "jack shit." If they really find "jack shit," they claim they actually found something.

Case in point: This absurd article from Hot Air's headlines a few days ago.

Juicy headline, extravagant conclusion... no real evidence whatsoever to back it up.

Ancient Graves Suggest Human Sacrifice

Physically disabled people may have been ritually sacrificed by European hunter-gatherer tribes as early as 24,000 years ago, according to an investigation into burials from the Upper Paleolithic period.

Well known in large, stratified ancient societies, ritual human sacrifice has never been apparent in the archaeological data of Upper Paleolithic Europe (about 26,000 to 8,000 B.C.).

But, according to lead study author Vincenzo Formicola of the University of Pisa in Italy, several of these burials suggest that human sacrifices may have been an important ritual activity in this period.

...

Analysis of the European record revealed an "intriguing high frequency of multiple burials."

Commonly attributed to simultaneous death due to natural disaster or disease, the multiple graves show a composition by age and sex and include severely deformed individuals, indicating that the burials may have been selective.

The researcher focused his investigation on three previously discovered sites in Russia, the Czech Republic and Italy. None of the remains buried at the three burials show signs of a violent death or sacrificial killing.

Nevertheless, the three graves share intriguing similarities: they all feature rich funerary decorations and include the remains of physically disabled people.

"The Sunghir double burial in Russia is probably the most spectacular and elaborate funerary example. A boy and a girl were placed head to head in a long, narrow, shallow grave. They were covered with red ochre and ornamented with extraordinarily rich and unique grave goods," Formicola wrote in the June issue of Current Anthropology.

The skeleton of the girl showed abnormal thigh bones that were bowed and shortened — most likely the result of a disease linked to a diabetic condition of the mother.

The grave goods included about 5,000 perforated ivory beads which had probably been sown into caps and clothing.

"Each ivory bead would have required the work of a specialist and would have taken more than a hour to make. This implies that the grave goods were ready when the two children died, raising the question of whether this ceremony was foreseen long in advance," Formicola said."

Ummmm... yeah. Or it could imply the jeweled clothing was actually worn by the kids in their actual living life, thus explaining the incredible mystery of how such garments could have been already made when they died. I mean, it's not as if rich/royal/cheiftain-related folks, those buried with lots of precious stones, actually wear such pretty baubles when they're alive.

No, apparently such indicators of high status are permitted only for one's burial garb. The rest of the time, the children of warlords walked around in sackcloth adorned with wet auroch-shit like the rest of the population. They were very egalitarian in their actual lifetimes, you see.

And of course it's simply beneath consideration that these kids were stricken by a fatal, but lingering, disease, and that their families had lots of time to arrange a funeral for the deaths they knew were coming. I mean, we all know there are no such diseases like that in the modern world; surely then there were none in the prehistoric one, either.

I have little doubt that ritual sacrifice occurred in most places, among most peoples, at various times. But are they really asking us to accept as proof of this the fact that the kids here were wearing clothing prepared in advance?

Hey -- here's more evidence. The kids were buried in a hole. Now, how did that hole get there, unless the families knew in advance they were scheduled to die?

I love this part:

Commonly attributed to simultaneous death due to natural disaster or disease, the multiple graves show a composition by age and sex and include severely deformed individuals, indicating that the burials may have been selective.

I'm amused at how glibly the article (and the "scientists" it reports on) dismisses the common explanation as being, well, not quite convincing. Natural disasters? Disease in the prehistoric world wiping out entire families? How silly! We know such things are extraodinarily rare -- in fact, I'm scratching my head trying to imagine a single instance of such a farfetched event ever occurring -- and the only plausible explanation is ritual sacrifice of the deformed.

When you have eliminated the impossible and all that jazz.

Posted by: Ace at 04:07 PM | Comments (11)
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The crime? Shaking women's hands in public.

He's shown, clearly, on videotape engaging in this vile perversion, but he claims... um, he claims the video is somehow "edited" or altered to show him doing what he insists he never did.

Posted by: Ace at 03:53 PM | Comments (5)
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Over the wires:

WASHINGTON (AP) -- The Associated Press has learned the Bush administration is nearing a decision to close the Guantanamo Bay terrorist detention facility.

Eh, no wonder he's spurning we conservative voters. He has all that support from liberal Democrats to fall back on.

Thanks to tmi3rd.

Posted by: Ace at 01:56 PM | Comments (46)
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A review of the June 27th (I think) release, which notes the Yippie Ki Yay Mother Fucker line is actually censored as "Yippie Ki Yay Mother [GUNSHOT NOISE], which isn't surprising, as that's pretty much what they did for the TV edit of Die Hard II.

Here's a quiz I just knocked together. Despite having seen DH a thousand times, I had trouble remembering quizzie questions about it. And I don't think I've seen that awful DHII more than once, so that's barely in here.

So a lot more questions about Die Hard With a Vengeance than the others, alas.
more...

Posted by: Ace at 01:53 PM | Comments (136)
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A bunch here.

A couple of Democrats, Webb and Bingaman, here.

Funny little bonus: Harry Reid lashes out at reporters for not writing more about the full depravity of Republican obstructionism. Funny, just a year ago obstructionism by the minority was 1) good and 2) furthermore so good it shouldn't even be mentioned in the news.

Kaus helpfully puts the names of waverers up for reelection in 2008 in bold face. Alexander (TN), Sununu (NH), Gordon Smith (OR) and Norm Coleman (MN). Roberts too, but for some strange reason he announced his intent to vote no on cloture today.

Here's that Senate contact list again.

Justs for shits and grins:

Alexander, Lamar- (R - TN) Class II
455 DIRKSEN SENATE OFFICE BUILDING WASHINGTON DC 20510
(202) 224-4944
Web Form: alexander.senate.gov/index.cfm?FuseAction=Contact.Home

Coleman, Norm- (R - MN) Class II
320 HART SENATE OFFICE BUILDING WASHINGTON DC 20510
(202) 224-5641
Web Form: coleman.senate.gov/index.cfm?FuseAction=Contact.ContactForm

Smith, Gordon H.- (R - OR) Class II
404 RUSSELL SENATE OFFICE BUILDING WASHINGTON DC 20510
(202) 224-3753
Web Form: gsmith.senate.gov/webform.htm

Sununu, John E.- (R - NH) Class II
111 RUSSELL SENATE OFFICE BUILDING WASHINGTON DC 20510
(202) 224-2841
Web Form: www.sununu.senate.gov/webform.html

A lot of these guys think they're safe as this controversy will be safely over by the next election cycle. Here's something to mention to them:

If there is no serious move towards real border security by the time of the next few elections -- which, you know, there won't be, and they know that -- we will hold them accountable for casting a vote in favor of a lie, a promise they never intended to to keep. We will not be any less angry in two, four, or six years -- and the bad news from this piece of shit bill will still be rolling in far into the future.

Posted by: Ace at 12:40 PM | Comments (9)
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I'm dumbfounded.

Mark Levin breaks this exlcusive story.

Snark aside, it's great stuff. Some obvious stuff has to be backed up with actual facts and a very insulting tone.

Posted by: Ace at 12:17 PM | Comments (35)
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A +5 Holy Avenger Ax.

Careful with that ax, Gabriel.

Thanks to EricA.

Posted by: Ace at 11:58 AM | Comments (31)
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As Big E says, "Why, I haven't been this upset since I got my last blowjob!"

Thanks to Jimmy Page. No, a different Jimmy Page.

Posted by: Ace at 11:49 AM | Comments (37)
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