If you're thinking you shouldn't play the video below, you're probably right. more...

Posted by: Ace at 06:20 AM | Comments (7)
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“Are you going to ask the locals what they know?” I said.

“Nah,” he said. “That's their deal. The Iraqi Police have their sources. We're their liaisons, their trainers. We're not in charge anymore. We're just here to help them become police officers instead of paramilitaries.”

From Michael Totten, helping (a little) look for explosives and weapons caches in Fallujah.

PS, the video posted of a massive IED going off near an American convoy is heartbreaking. Not graphic, because it's shot from long distance, but there is very little doubt that many American heroes were killed or badly wounded by the blast.

Posted by: Ace at 06:07 AM | Comments (2)
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Sort of.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 09:57 PM | Add Comment
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What could possibly go wrong?. I'm pretty sure SkyNet had some sort of mechanism like that, and we all know how well that turned out.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at 07:32 PM | Comments (39)
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Okay, I'd hoped this would come later so I could prepare, but I guess not.

Fuckin' slapdash operation this is.

We just passed twenty million unique hits. That's an astonishing amount of raw stupidity disseminated, propagated, debated and dissected (ineptly) over the course of these last four long, long, retarded years.

Thanks for all you for coming here, and drooling all over yourselves, and learning to tie your shoes (sort of), and making peanut butter sandwiches with dulled plastic safety knives ("fun-knives!"), and wearing socks of mismatched and garish hues, and walking into walls that suddenly lurch in front of you, and of course menacing random women on the street by shouting out I'M LOOKING AT YOU AND TOUCHING MYSELF! I'M LOOKING AT YOUR AND TOUCHING MYSELF!" until a nice friendly officer escorts you back to your, um, cages.

Seriously, thank you. I'm a failure, but without you, I'd be a homeless failure, and that sucks, because I really like fucking television and masturbating, and those are tough hobbies to practice out on the street, though from what I can tell, both can be managed.

And thank the cobloggers too, whatever their names are, the tubby one who sometimes tries to eat the cat, the, uhhh, girl who's hands had to be tied behind her back because she wouldn't give her No-No Special Place a rest for five fuckin' minutes, the odd looking feller with glue in his hair (I think it's glue) who wears nothing but a Rebel Alliance Starfighter Helmet and a jockstrap... and of course JackM., who writes poems about women on FoxNews.

By the way: I just mention this because it's been pointed out to me by several people. I stopped counting at 10, I think. Also, it's actually just plain pain impressions -- non-unique hits -- that really get counted for traffic, so, really, this doesn't matter at all.

But it is a rather remarkable testament to a group of people's power to collectively will the world a stupider place.

Just For The Hell of It: Repost-- The Single Greatest Link Ever Posted On Ace of Spades.

Okay, so one time, in the afternoon, I meant to link some news story on the blog, but what I actually posted was the last link I had copied, which, as it turns out, was a Lorna Morgan/Danni Ashe medium-core lesbian humpfest.

I think it was Laura who corrected that. I was, uh, not really minding the blog at the time.

Oh I was at the computer. Just not at the blog.

Anyway, as it seems to have excited you jabbering peanutheads, I'll re-post, for like five minutes only, the greatest link ever posted on this site, just to do it.

Not safe for work, seriously. Not a joke. This is two girls goin' wild on each other's munge-biscuits, just as nature intended.

The Greatest Link Ever Posted on Ace of Spades, and possibly on any political blog, reposted.

Posted by: Ace at 06:35 PM | Comments (124)
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He killed himself to protest the Muslim presence in the West, and to get publicity for the "right wing" cause.

Way to help out the team, buddy. Thanks! Just the PR we were looking for.

Think you can maybe find an attractive young pharmacist and shoot her in the face for selling condoms on your way out? No? Eh, don't bother. We'll get someone else for that. Need to get on that stat, though, we have an election coming up.

His suicide note boldly predicted:

I have no doubt the Leftist Media will spin my death as that of an insane man with few options left in life who killed himself in desperation.

Jesus... we lost him? It's like losing Tesla. He saw the future.

Thanks to Alice H.

PS, yeah, it's a pity, obviously he was fucked up and all and depression and insanity are horrible, but I really don't feel like indulging a suicide the martyrdom he was seeking.

Posted by: Ace at 04:03 PM | Comments (56)
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Not this guy.

Guess that party? Oh yes, guess that party.

Thanks to Liberrocky.

Funny... and Unrelated: Seems better than a sidebar item, but not good enough for its own post. Smells like a movement -- an unrelated update movement.

This guy will do stuff for you for money.

Yeah, I know, it's the basis of the modern economy. And whoremongering. But this is different. He offers to do goofy shit for you.

Question: How is this guy any different than Barack Obama?

Thanks to AliceH.

Posted by: Ace at 03:40 PM | Comments (18)
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Supposedly the dressed "provocatively."

The new finding reveals instead that a Viking woman's dress consisted of a single piece of fabric with an opening in the front. A pair of brooches, or clasps, was situated on top of the breasts to accentuate the wearer's figure.

"It's easy to imagine that the Christian church had certain reservations about clothing that accentuated the breasts in this way and, what's more, exposed the under shift in front," Larsson said. "It's also possible that this clothing was associated with pre-Christian rituals and was therefore forbidden" once Christianity became established.

Okay, imagining a buxom blond Viking woman with her breasts spilling out over the top of her dress? Yeah, me too. Now here's the photo the story runs with the picture to illustrate this, and yes, I'm dead fucking serious this is the photo:
more...

Posted by: Ace at 02:42 PM | Comments (57)
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The world's first supposed brain-scanning game controller, allowing you to play your favorite games using nothing but mindthoughts and soulpatterns.

Gamers will soon be able to interact with the virtual world using their thoughts and emotions alone.

A neuro-headset which interprets the interaction of neurons in the brain will go on sale later this year.

"It picks up electrical activity from the brain and sends wireless signals to a computer," said Tan Le, president of US/Australian firm Emotiv.

"It allows the user to manipulate a game or virtual environment naturally and intuitively," she added.

The brain is made up of about 100 billion nerve cells, or neurons, which emit an electrical impulse when interacting. The headset implements a technology known as non-invasive electroencephalography (EEG) to read the neural activity.

...

Headsets which read neural activity are not new, but Ms Le said the Epoc was the first consumer device that can be used for gaming.

"This is the first headset that doesn't require a large net of electrodes, or a technician to calibrate or operate it and does require gel on the scalp," she said. "It also doesn't cost tens of thousands of dollars."

Does this sound gay to you so far? No? But there's so much more.

...

It can also read emotions of players and translate those to the virtual world. "The headset could be used to improve the realism of emotional responses of AI characters in games," said Ms Le.

"If you laughed or felt happy after killing a character in a game then your virtual buddy could admonish you for being callous," she explained.

Now how much would you pay?

They seem to have a firm understanding of the gamer's market, here. They realize that gamers are such hard-core athletic types that they are really in need of some system that removes the last vestige of trivial physical movement from gaming, and that further nothing enhances gameplay like being admonished by a buddy for being "callous" for killing a character.

Thanks to someone.

Posted by: Ace at 01:59 PM | Comments (25)
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Interesting, but a solid 43% does not win elections, not unless H. Ross Perot is running too:

Thirty-four percent (34%) of all voters say they will definitely vote for John McCain if he is on the ballot this November. Thirty-three percent (33%) will definitely vote against him while 29% say their support hinges on who his opponent is.

Barack Obama has the same number who will definitely vote for him--34%. But, more people are committed to voting against him than McCain. Forty-three percent (43%) say they will definitely reject him at the ballot box. For 18%, their support depends on his opponent.

I think perhaps that indicates that the Republicans' low party-identification numbers indicates more a general malaise with the party rather than an actual abandonment of basic Republican/conservative philosophy.

Could that have been more obvious? Could I possibly do a worse job today?

Here's some more interesting commentary for you: Dogs are queer for tennis balls. Yeah, I know. Just blew your fucking minds, huh?

Thanks to Liberrocky.

More: Hot Air points out this marks a 7% rise in Obama's negatives the past month.

Oh, and Hillary is attacking him on foreign policy. Yawn.

Posted by: Ace at 01:18 PM | Comments (31)
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