Ace of Spades HQ

March 15, 2014

AOSHQ Food Pyramid (CBD)
— Open Blogger

The current food pyramid is nothing of a sort. It is an unusable, overly complex process called ChooseMyPlate.

I defy anyone to glean any useful (or even correct) information in simple form from this website. Anyone who does will win an AOSHQ Platinum membership (without ampersand capability).

[addendum] The AOSHQ Pyramid is a work in progress, so any advice would be appreciated.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 06:45 AM | Comments (301)
Post contains 69 words, total size 1 kb.

1 What's with all the vegetables?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 15, 2014 06:46 AM (FE/sZ)

2 my only quibble is the placement of bourbon and bacon. These days, I think bourbon and bacon should be switched. Need a solid base to work from.

Posted by: Blake at March 15, 2014 06:46 AM (2IqjF)

Vegetables are pointy because they poke you in the butt when you poop them out.

I couldn't navigate that site. The color scheme makes me want to hurt people.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 06:47 AM (TOk1P)

4 Potatoes are vegetables, right?

We're all set then.

Posted by: The Moron Horde, now with bonus BACONNNN!! at March 15, 2014 06:48 AM (iTT/w)

5 Waaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttt... It's THAT easy to get a Platinum Membership? Quick, someone pass the Valurite over here, I'm gonna take a stab at it but I need to be *really* drunk!

Posted by: Gmac-Pondering the coming implosion, and hoping its 404care at March 15, 2014 06:48 AM (baiNQ)

5 -

Don't get too drunk. It looks like someone already puked all over that site.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 06:49 AM (TOk1P)

7 Needs moar bacon.

Posted by: meat is murder. tasty, tasty murder at March 15, 2014 06:49 AM (qxj6R)

8 They should call that site "ChooseMyPlateRightOrThey'llChooseItForMe"

Too long? how about www.allyourplatesarebelongtous.GOV

Posted by: The Moron Horde, now with bonus BACONNNN!! at March 15, 2014 06:50 AM (iTT/w)

9 That's why, I'm gonna puke all over the bastard. It'll be epic enough to get the lifetime platinum membership!

Posted by: Gmac-Pondering the coming implosion, and hoping its 404care at March 15, 2014 06:50 AM (baiNQ)

10 Just bourbon?

Posted by: EC at March 15, 2014 06:51 AM (doBIb)

11 I am in the Vegetable Rights Action League (VRAL). I speak on behalf of Vegetables who cannot speak for themselves. I want to bring to your attention today the horrific process of people RIPPING Baby Vegetables away from their Mothers who cannot protect them. This barbaric process HAS to stop! I am calling for action on behalf of ALL vegetables! VRAL NOW!

Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 15, 2014 06:51 AM (jucos)

12 I assume the hobo is carrying the pyramid?

Posted by: RoyalOil at March 15, 2014 06:52 AM (VjL9S)

13 Any site with an entry called "what is physical activity?" just has to be chock full of useful information.

Posted by: Scanner Dan at March 15, 2014 06:52 AM (DHXV/)

14 Where the hell is the chocolate???

Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 06:53 AM (EvHC8)

15 Ugh that site is a hot mess.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 06:53 AM (GrtrJ)

16 My Plate = Taco Protein: Beef, Chicken, Fish Vegetable: Lettuce Fruit: Tomato Grain: Taco shell Dairy: Cheese Sounds good to me.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 06:53 AM (IXrOn)

17 Where's the pie? And the brownies? And the cookies? And the hot fudge sundaes? Okay, sugar and chocolate are "veggies," but really. Someone could make a terrible mistake and think that by "veggies" you mean broccoli and arugula or something.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at March 15, 2014 06:54 AM (dfYL9)

18
ChooseMyPlate.gov ‏@MyPlate Mar 14
Add low-fat cheese slices your sandwich to get #calcium at lunch time.

Whoa! You can put cheese on sandwiches? Well, it sounds crazy -- but maybe just crazy enough to work...

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 06:55 AM (kdS6q)

19 Veggies = beer, cheese, chicken, chocolate, ice cream, cookies, wine, sammitches and pie.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 06:56 AM (GrtrJ)

20 It's missing the chocolate tier.

Posted by: SarahW at March 15, 2014 06:57 AM (Lbv/k)

21 Is there any evidence the "Popular Topics" are actually popular?

Posted by: Michael at March 15, 2014 06:57 AM (smKbx)

22 Someone could make a terrible mistake and think that by "veggies" you mean broccoli and arugula or something.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at March 15, 2014 10:54 AM (dfYL9)

I have assumed a minimum intelligence among the horde.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 15, 2014 06:57 AM (QFxY5)

23 Okay, I looked at the "healthy eating on a budget" link, and it had stuff like salmon and buckwheat pancakes listed in the 7 day menu. Are they using canned salmon vice fresh? Because that would be somewhat affordable, although gagging it down would take some doing. But buckwheat pancakes? The only buckwheat mix I know of is Bob's Red Mill, which has a great variety of grains, but are not cheap. Heck, they don't fit into our food budget, when I want to buy vegetables and fruit, so how are EBT types going to pay for that stuff?

Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 06:58 AM (EvHC8)

24 I assume the hobo is carrying the pyramid?

He's under it. Like that Pixar "I" smashed under the jumping light.

Posted by: Hobo Hunter Rights Action League at March 15, 2014 06:58 AM (iTT/w)

25
ChooseMyPlate.gov ‏@MyPlate Mar 12
Plan now -- to help others to "Discover Dark-Green Veggies" on March 17th.

"It discovers dark-green veggies, or else it gets the hose again."

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 06:59 AM (kdS6q)

26 &&&&&&

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 06:59 AM (0HooB)

27 It's a dot gov site. Never go to a dot gov site.

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 06:59 AM (oMKp3)

28 Chocolate is actually a fruit AND a floor wax

Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 15, 2014 07:00 AM (jucos)

29 You misspelled "blondies" as "vegetables". AtC only eats from the top of the pyramid.

Posted by: Conservative Crank's iPhone at March 15, 2014 07:00 AM (R+XDI)

30 Is there any evidence the "Popular Topics" are actually popular? ----------------------- In the Post Modern Era, we decide what is popular.

Posted by: The State at March 15, 2014 07:00 AM (aDwsi)

31 Neener, neener, neener.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:00 AM (0HooB)

32 Posted by: Hobo Hunter Rights Action League at March 15, 2014 10:58 AM (iTT/w)

I didn't specify pork bacon or beef steak.

That's the joy of this pyramid....so many choices!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 15, 2014 07:01 AM (QFxY5)

33 I guess you can't really put blow jobs on a food pyramid.

Posted by: Adam at March 15, 2014 07:01 AM (Aif/5)

34 Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 10:58 AM (EvHC

They list salmon as a budget item? Seriously?

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:02 AM (oMKp3)

35 ... so how are EBT types going to pay for that stuff? EBT is for lobster, silly.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:02 AM (0HooB)

36 It's truly a testament to the comedy/sarc/snark chops of the posters here who are able to make cogent mockery of this gov't site. It's pretty bad even for gov't work.

Posted by: Taqyia2Me at March 15, 2014 07:02 AM (PiGvm)

37 They list salmon as a budget item? Seriously?

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 11:02 AM (oMKp3)

_____________

I guess if you catch it yourself it is....

Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 15, 2014 07:03 AM (jucos)

38 Biscuits and sausage gravy should be somewhere on that pyramid.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:03 AM (0HooB)

39 Eating on a budget: arugula, lobster and waygu steak.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:04 AM (GrtrJ)

40 it's missing beer and gravy

Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 07:04 AM (At8tV)

41 It's not a food pyramid but a food circle. On your plate you put meat in the lower third, potatoes to the right and vegs farthest away to the left - unless corn on the cob which would replace meat as the spot closest to your mouth.

Posted by: The Yellow Pug at March 15, 2014 07:04 AM (r7mtu)

42 They just forgot to tell you that it's Preezy and Mooch's budget, not necessarily your own.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:04 AM (GrtrJ)

43 it's missing beer and gravy

Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 11:04 AM (At8tV)

>>>>>>>>>>>>

And SPAM.

Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 15, 2014 07:04 AM (jucos)

44 Where's the chocolate?

Posted by: alexthechick - come for the Global Warming stay for the SMOD at March 15, 2014 07:04 AM (Gk3SS)

45 Really? We're paying for that site?

Posted by: Voice of Despair at March 15, 2014 07:05 AM (aDwsi)

46 You drink the Bourbon while the bacon is cooking, helps to relive the little burns from the splatters. You use the valu-rite to clean the pan.

Posted by: Jean at March 15, 2014 07:05 AM (Aqvh6)

47 How did people know how to eat in the pre-internet ages? It is a miracle that they survived.

Posted by: Voice of Despair at March 15, 2014 07:05 AM (aDwsi)

48 ...but are not cheap. Heck, they don't fit into our food budget, when I want to buy vegetables and fruit, so how are EBT types going to pay for that stuff? Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 10:58 AM (EvHC

---------- Have you seen how much $ they get on those cards? My ex is getting $500+ monthly. Enough for her to buy all the junk food she can shove in her pie hole & still trade the remainder for her weed.

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:05 AM (CYqDc)

49 it's missing beer and gravy Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 11:04 AM (At8tV) And mashed potatoes

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:06 AM (t3UFN)

50 You can get frozen salmon pretty cheap. And it's not bad for what it is.

Posted by: Adam at March 15, 2014 07:06 AM (Aif/5)

51 Whenever I get hungry, I go to a government website to tell me what to eat. Who doesn't?

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:06 AM (oMKp3)

52 Twenty-seven of you have already clicked on that site and didn't stay long enough to actually learn anything we had to teach you. Don't think we didn't notice.

And you with the beer and cheetoes: PUT THAT DOWN and why not wash your face once in a while? Dirt isn't healthy unless it's for growing arugula.

Posted by: Your Caring Friends at USDA.gov at March 15, 2014 07:06 AM (iTT/w)

53 Where's the doggy?

Posted by: Baracky Soetero at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (dfYL9)

54 That website looks like the final rendition of the "Boyd's Toast" web comic on theoatmeal.com

Posted by: killface at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (dr0xf)

55 Didn't you hear? Eating meat = Larger Carbon Footprint according to our Gaia worshiping, vegan diet-pushing "betters." And now they're going to be adjusting the fed's dietary guidelines to reflect this. I wish I were kidding.

http://preview.tinyurl.com/k7osdma

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (aq/zi)

56 Meanwhile, the Russian Deputy PM has taken to Twitter to goof on western military powers: https://twitter.com/Rogozin/status/444723344165044225

Posted by: holygoat at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (vAiDn)

57 If Cheetos are counted as a vegetable, I see no problem with the chart. If Cheetos are counted as a dairy, big problem with the chart.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, aka MrCaniac at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (HxSXm)

58 Where's biscuits and gravy ?

Posted by: sock_rat_eez at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (jNNWD)

59 And Guinness. It's Good for You! http://tinyurl.com/pak9my5

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:07 AM (0HooB)

60 Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 11:05 AM (CYqDc) $500 a month? That's insane.

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:08 AM (oMKp3)

61
ChooseMyPlate.gov ‏@MyPlate Feb 11
More snow or cold #weather heading your way? Bundle up & get outside even for just a brief time. Make sure you move fast to stay warm!

Might point out people in cold climate, like your average Aleut, have diets high in fat and meat. But, hey -- what do they know.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 07:08 AM (kdS6q)

62 If you like your vegetables, you can keep your vegetables. No, really, USDA - keep 'em.

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX (@Teresa_Koch) at March 15, 2014 07:08 AM (PZ6/M)

63 I guess you can't really put blow jobs on a food pyramid. Posted by: Adam at March 15, 2014 11:01 AM (Aif/5)

Protein.

I know I've told this story before but like that will stop me. A whole bunch of people at my old office decided to go hard core Atkins and I happened to wander past this Serious You Guys conversation about the most efficient way to get protein.

The people involved in the conversation did not understand why I had to lean against the wall because I was laughing so hard.

Posted by: alexthechick - come for the Global Warming stay for the SMOD at March 15, 2014 07:08 AM (Gk3SS)

64 And Guinness. It's good for you!

Posted by: Fox2! at March 15, 2014 07:09 AM (cHwSy)

65 Years ago I had a consulting gig that kept me away from home all week, and my wife at the time expressed concern (a core competency of hers) about my eating habits. I assured her that I always made sure I had something from the four basic food groups every day. Everything was fine until she asked me to define the groups, to which I responded "Pizza, Steak, Beer, and Scotch".

This routine was upset when my employer realized that it was cheaper to fly me to my gig on a scheduled helicopter service than to put me up in a hotel every night. So I got in a lot of helicopter time flying over some very beautiful scenery, often at treetop level due to weather conditions, but being at home every evening played hell with my diet.

By the way, I learned that helicopters ride much better in turbulence than fixed-wing aircraft. I believe this is due to the fact that the "wing" loading of the blades are much higher than that of a real wing, not to mention that they are much more flexible. We took off in some conditions that approached hurricane winds, and the ride was remarkably smooth.

But I digress.

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at March 15, 2014 07:09 AM (qIFL7)

66 I wonder what food they are eating on flight 370? Or what's eating them?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:09 AM (t3UFN)

67 61 ChooseMyPlate.gov ‏@MyPlate Feb 11 More snow or cold #weather heading your way? Bundle up get outside even for just a brief time. Make sure you move fast to stay warm! Bundle up. Eat your vegetables. Who did they hire to write this stuff, my mom?

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:10 AM (oMKp3)

68 I'm going to spend Saturday watching MyPlate videos and appreciating how my tax dollars are ~~wasted~~ spent. Oh yes, I am.

Posted by: Lady in Black, part-time lurker waiting for the promised SMOD at March 15, 2014 07:10 AM (22bm2)

69 Five food groups -- meat, fat, salt, hot peppers and alcohol.

Posted by: Phinn at March 15, 2014 07:10 AM (i5GO4)

70 Canned salmon isn't too bad as far as price goes, and if you use enough hot peppers, it's actually edible. I keep some in the storm stash, actually.

Posted by: Empire1 at March 15, 2014 07:10 AM (D+ucQ)

71 I don't see nicotine on the pyramid. Maybe that's more of a vitamin.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:10 AM (UAMVq)

72 Damn! ~~strike~~

Posted by: Lady in Black, part-time lurker waiting for the promised SMOD at March 15, 2014 07:10 AM (22bm2)

73 UN Security Council about to vote on a something concerning Ukraine that Russia will veto. Talk about wasted air and global warming

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:11 AM (t3UFN)

74 Didn't you hear? Eating meat = Larger Carbon Footprint according to our Gaia worshiping, vegan diet-pushing "betters."

I have a carbon footprint the size of Africa. And I'm keeping it that way.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:11 AM (GrtrJ)

75 My food pyramid.

Peak: YOLO
1/2 of base: Calories in
1/2 of base: Calories Burned

Posted by: The Hickster at March 15, 2014 07:11 AM (TI3xG)

76 I wish I was hearing (and saying) "I wish I were kidding" a lot less. If the old time Parisian Surrealists could see Our Modern Life they'd soil themselves and give up dope and absinthe (and maybe surrealism, too).

Posted by: sock_rat_eez at March 15, 2014 07:11 AM (jNNWD)

77 What, no Buffalo Wings? Oh, the outlandish outrage!

Posted by: Jimmygee at March 15, 2014 07:11 AM (CyWLS)

78 Bundle up. Eat your vegetables. Who did they hire to write this stuff, my mom? Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 11:10 AM (oMKp3) Moochelle "Big Mamma" Obama

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:12 AM (UAMVq)

79 $500 a month? That's insane. Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 11:08 AM (oMKp3) ------------ And that's after the decrease last year. They literally have no incentive to shop wisely. Meanwhile, I only buy meats when it has the pink tag (almost out of date) & eat ramen way too much

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:12 AM (CYqDc)

80 ChooseMyPlate.gov ‏@MyPlate Feb 11
More snow or cold #weather heading your way? Bundle up get outside even for just a brief time. Make sure you move fast to stay warm!

Seems awfully fucking bossy to me.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:12 AM (GrtrJ)

81 60 $500 a month? That's insane. Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 11:08 AM (oMKp3) ------------------------- Not if you eat pizza, KFC, and other take-out every night. *sigh*

Posted by: Baracky Soetero at March 15, 2014 07:13 AM (dfYL9)

82 Hey chi! My appearance on the ONT was even briefer than I planned. I thought blondies were the food of choice in Alextopia?

Posted by: Conservative Crank's iPhone at March 15, 2014 07:13 AM (R+XDI)

83 What have we done?!

Posted by: Old Time Parisian Surrealists at March 15, 2014 07:13 AM (aDwsi)

84 48-well, dayum. Bless your heart shred, I guess it's a blessing you two are no longer together. I hate saying that, but in this case, I think it's warrented. And 500+ for groceries? I keep reading sob stories in our local rag (WaPo) about families who are barely feeding their kids on that. My guess is they are trading away half of it for stuff not covered by foodstamps, and then crying over a 250 per month grocery budget. Even with that, if you are careful and use coupons, you can eat decently, and healthfully. But 500 just for food? Dayum.

Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 07:13 AM (EvHC8)

85 48 ...but are not cheap. Heck, they don't fit into our food budget, when I want to buy vegetables and fruit, so how are EBT types going to pay for that stuff? Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 10:58 AM (EvHC ---------- Have you seen how much $ they get on those cards? My ex is getting $500+ monthly. Enough for her to buy all the junk food she can shove in her pie hole & still trade the remainder for her weed. Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 11:05 AM (CYqDc) Over $500 a month? WTF?

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:14 AM (UAMVq)

86 Anyone else in LA feel the earthquake just now?

Posted by: Epobirs at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (bPxS6)

87 Bacon should be on there 3 times since you can have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (t3UFN)

From the site, such as it is - empty calories:

" Solid fats and added sugars add calories to the food but few or no nutrients. "

I am so tired of this "empty calorie" crap", if you can burn a calorie of food, it isn't "empty".

Grass and styrofoam - now those are empty calories.

Posted by: The Party of Science ! at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (uN4Ye)

89 In honor of St Pats - corned beef hash with three eggs and hot sauce, and a beer for breakfast.

Posted by: Jean at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (Aqvh6)

90 They covered healthy eating when I was in the 4th grad in school. There was no government site to go to.

And anyone that has to go to the gov to learn how to eat good has to be dumber than a post.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (T2V/1)

91 87 Bacon should be on there 3 times since you can have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 11:15 AM (t3UFN) You forgot second breakfast and elevensies.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (UAMVq)

92 Anyone else in LA feel the earthquake just now? Posted by: Epobirs at March 15, 2014 11:15 AM (bPxS6) If your still on the internet then it is not worth mentioning

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (t3UFN)

93 Is not Value Rite made of Vegetable's? That solves that.

Posted by: 7 Days in May at March 15, 2014 07:15 AM (WYUAi)

94 Epobirs - did half of it slide into the sea?

Posted by: Jean at March 15, 2014 07:16 AM (Aqvh6)

95 A family of four had to earn close to $80K a year to break even with gov't benefits to help the "poor".

Posted by: Conservative Crank's iPhone at March 15, 2014 07:16 AM (R+XDI)

96 Hey, CCrank. I tried to shout out to you, but you were gone already, I guess. I bailed fairly early, too.

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:17 AM (CYqDc)

97 @ 92 that was an ass chewing from the little innocent Scandahoovian Wifey.

Posted by: 7 Days in May at March 15, 2014 07:17 AM (WYUAi)

98 95 A family of four had to earn close to $80K a year to break even with gov't benefits to help the "poor". Posted by: Conservative Crank's iPhone at March 15, 2014 11:16 AM (R+XDI) I can't even begin to coherently discuss how colossally fucked up that is.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:17 AM (UAMVq)

99
I wonder what food they are eating on flight 370? Or what's eating them?
Posted by: Nevergiveup

Here you go:

http://tinyurl.com/l3ouvpm

Oooo - satay!

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 07:17 AM (kdS6q)

100 Have you seen how much $ they get on those cards? My ex is getting $500+ monthly. Enough for her to buy all the junk food she can shove in her pie hole & still trade the remainder for her weed. Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 11:05 AM (CYqDc) Is that scaled for the size of the family? Because, $500/mo for one person is luxury.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 07:17 AM (IXrOn)

101 This site's super-easy to use; two mouse-clicks and I found the perfect 3200kCal per day meal plan for 7- to 9- year-olds. wait whaaaaaaaaaaaat

Posted by: 3.14159 at March 15, 2014 07:18 AM (3MPBe)

102 Vegetables are pointy because they poke you in the butt when you poop them out. I couldn't navigate that site. The color scheme makes me want to hurt people. Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 10:47 AM (TOk1P) They only had 463 million to make the site work.

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:18 AM (QeH9j)

103 Comical that they put tuna on their suggested menus for lunch. While: Un-American Tuna Why your kid can't get a tuna sandwich at school. wsj.com opinion section

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 07:18 AM (IXrOn)

104 Hmm. Just realized today is the Ides of March.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:19 AM (aDwsi)

105 oh wait, 9-17 year olds. Still though, those kids better be deadlifting.

Posted by: 3.14159 at March 15, 2014 07:19 AM (3MPBe)

106

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:19 AM (aDwsi)

107 70-I admit, I make a heck of a salmon croquette out of canned salmon, but it tastes much better when we (rarely) have leftover grilled salmon. But even the canned stuff is pricey here-3-4 bucks for a small tuna sized can. 50-I have a hard time with the texture, but it could have been the brand (walmart, so yeah, it probably was the brand.) Will have to try it again with a different brand.

Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 07:19 AM (EvHC8)

108 Comical that they put tuna on their suggested menus for lunch. You gotta have the USRDA of mercury and dolphin.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:19 AM (UAMVq)

109 artisnal - You owe me.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:19 AM (aDwsi)

110 Where the hell is my chicken fried steak and eggs?

Posted by: Meremortal at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (jTKU5)

111 "Build and save your favorite recipes for tracking..." That should work out well.

Posted by: Michael at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (smKbx)

112 Uh oh. Looks like barrel time!

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (UAMVq)

113 Can you replace vegetables at the top with schadenfreude?

Posted by: Shooter McGavin at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (EKqcK)

114 Looks just about right to me

Posted by: Jack Rackim at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (dCzEf)

115 samantha powers is whining like a bitch right now at the UN. I think I hear the Russian Ambassador snicker ing

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (t3UFN)

116 I can't even begin to coherently discuss how colossally fucked up that is.

--

You Republicans just want poor people starve! Take food from right out of they mouths to keep tax cuts for the rich. And....rayciss.

Posted by: Al Sharpton at March 15, 2014 07:20 AM (22bm2)

117 My throat is dry. Does that site address what to do at this point?

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:21 AM (QeH9j)

118 I wonder how many calories are in that stuff on the inside of the barrel? The part that glows in the dark, not the other stuff.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:21 AM (0HooB)

119 I know pudding's not for eating, but it should prolly be there somewhere- possibly dripping from the bottom of the pyramid.

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at March 15, 2014 07:21 AM (bUmSq)

120 I had to use the "Choose My Plate" site for a project in my Fitness and Wellness (phys ed) class last semester. I argued that t wasn't correct and the professor agreed that the guidelines weren't great, but we still had to use it. Then again, a goddamned yoga teacher so whatever.

Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 07:21 AM (N/cFh)

121 For the brief time I was on EBT I was allowed $100 a month. Not really worth bothering with.

Posted by: backhoe at March 15, 2014 07:21 AM (ULH4o)

122 They have a link there to "the People's Garden". If I click on it, will it take me to a site in communist China?

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:22 AM (oMKp3)

123
Anyone else in LA feel the earthquake just now?
Posted by: Epobirs

Yeah, actually just did. But it was a tiny, "was that a quake or not?" sort of maybe shaker.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 07:22 AM (kdS6q)

124 119 I know pudding's not for eating, but it should prolly be there somewhere- possibly dripping from the bottom of the pyramid. Posted by: Beefy Meatball at March 15, 2014 11:21 AM (bUmSq) That's not pudding...

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:22 AM (UAMVq)

125 I don't think we spend anywhere close to $500 a month for our family. We could eat like kings if we did.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:22 AM (GrtrJ)

126 Eat we much.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:22 AM (0HooB)

127 Vegetables = Freedom Fries

Posted by: Y-not at March 15, 2014 07:23 AM (zDsvJ)

128 50-I have a hard time with the texture, but it could have been the brand (walmart, so yeah, it probably was the brand.) Will have to try it again with a different brand.

--

I make salmon patties with Chicken of the Sea canned salmon. Skinless and boneless. It's actually very good and fairly mild. I make mine like crab cakes with green and red peppers and onions. Yum.

Posted by: Lady in Black, part-time lurker waiting for the promised SMOD at March 15, 2014 07:23 AM (22bm2)

129 Can I demand your pyramid include space for SOME (one) of Michelle Obama's "School Lunch Essentials".....Or am I being too "bossy"?

Posted by: Intimidated Girl Scout at March 15, 2014 07:23 AM (V0j3u)

130 Real men of genius. Mr. Giant Taco Salad inventor

http://tinyurl.com/mkvj46a

Posted by: Chinaacid at March 15, 2014 07:23 AM (atPLq)

131 Isn't "The People's Garden" Moochelle's lead-infused arugula patch?

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:23 AM (GrtrJ)

132 >125 I don't think we spend anywhere close to $500 a month for our family. We could eat like kings if we did.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 11:22 AM (GrtrJ)<

That doesn't include booze, right?

Posted by: Muad'dib at March 15, 2014 07:23 AM (PlTXA)

133 Wait... you guys don't eat the hobos you kill?

Posted by: Passably Affable at March 15, 2014 07:24 AM (/YzPM)

134 Is that scaled for the size of the family?Â Because, $500/mo for one person is luxury. Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 11:17 AM (IXrOn) ------------- Her and two young kids. I don't know how they do the math, but she has $0 outgoing for bills. No rent or utilities. T mobile & car insurance bill, i guess. I've watched her load a grocery cart - piled - with junk / processed crap / frozen dinners and still have more than half the $ left. Then take her suppliers wife shopping. And buy for her folks.

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:24 AM (CYqDc)

135 I think I might spend about $250-$300 a month on groceries. I don't buy shmancy organics and buy a lot of fruit. In season, it's less expensive and tastes better.

Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 07:24 AM (N/cFh)

136 Because, $500/mo for one person is luxury.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 11:17 AM (IXrOn)

For $500/month I can feed four people. Easily. Maybe not the most exciting and wonderful meals, but they'll be healthy and filling.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 15, 2014 07:24 AM (QFxY5)

137 88 Grass and styrofoam - now those are empty calories. Posted by: The Party of Science ! at March 15, 2014 11:15 AM (uN4Ye) ------------- Grass? GRASS?!? Stuff it, you freaking wonk.

Posted by: Bossy the Cow at March 15, 2014 07:24 AM (dfYL9)

138

You know, that Malaysia Airlines looks pretty low tier.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 07:24 AM (kdS6q)

139 129 Can I demand your pyramid include space for SOME (one) of Michelle Obama's "School Lunch Essentials".....Or am I being too "bossy"? Posted by: Intimidated Girl Scout at March 15, 2014 11:23 AM (V0j3u) You can stick your jicama chips and fat free Ranch dip where the sun don't shine.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:25 AM (UAMVq)

140 What a great thread at just the right time. I was having trouble deciding what to make for lunch. Reading this I decided steak. I went down to the freezer and realized I still had a decision to make. The problem was deciding between ribeye, sirloin and T-bone. I went with the ribeye. (hubby said I couldn't waste the T-bones)

Posted by: Molly k. at March 15, 2014 07:25 AM (f8cHe)

141 Going out to dinner tonight at a Steak house. Expecting to eat like a pig

Posted by: Nevergiveup at March 15, 2014 07:25 AM (t3UFN)

142 121- my grandmother was on ebt for a few months before she finally moved in with us ( many years ago). She was allowed 35 dollars a month. She was put out that healthy young men were coming in and getting 200-300 a month, when she was completely disabled. Which is why we finally convinced her to move in with my parents and let us take care of her.

Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 07:25 AM (EvHC8)

143

The government is involved so it is hella messed up. I was at my kids school over lunch one day last week and the waste is criminal. Most of the kids threw away what the government overlords say is healthy to eat. Choices are being restricted and yes... they do take kids candy and soda away. Absolutely no common sense whatsoever. So, because of government mandates at the school lunch level, they might as well just take all of the healthy foods they mandate to be purchased and send them directly to a landfill or mulch pile. Our government at work.

Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 15, 2014 07:25 AM (jucos)

144 Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at March 15, 2014 11:22 AM (kdS6q)

That's called an orgasm.

Posted by: Ernest Hemingway at March 15, 2014 07:26 AM (QFxY5)

145 That doesn't include booze, right?
Posted by: Muad'dib at March 15, 2014 11:23 AM (PlTXA)

I was told there would be no math.

Posted by: DangerGirl at March 15, 2014 07:26 AM (GrtrJ)

146 So a Chicago grifter lawyer, with no notable skill set beyond dumping patients and a fondness for saying "Americans are mean", gets to set the school lunch program for the entire United States from her unelected position.

This, in many ways, is the story of Obama.

Posted by: GnuBreed at March 15, 2014 07:26 AM (cHZB7)

147 The gov was pushing carbs for so long, how much of the obesity/diabetes epidemic is DC's fault?

Posted by: Baldy at March 15, 2014 07:26 AM (2bql3)

148 Where's the (hobo) beef?!

Posted by: SOCR the Lurker at March 15, 2014 07:26 AM (EkAxJ)

149 WHAT IS A PEOPLE'S GARDEN? (From the website) People's Gardens vary in size and type, but all are required to have three components in common. They must benefit the community, in some cases by creating recreational spaces and in others by providing a harvest for a local food bank or shelter. They must be collaborative - that is, the garden must be created and maintained by a partnership of local individuals, groups, or organizations. And third, they should incorporate sustainable practices. The gardens might use compost or mulch made by participants. They might contain native plants or encourage beneficial insects. They also might exemplify water conservation, for instance, capturing rain in a barrel to water the garden. Gardens located at private residences are not eligible to become People's Gardens. You can declare an existing garden as a People's Garden as long as it incorporates the three components.

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:26 AM (oMKp3)

150 So, because of government mandates at the school lunch level, they might as well just take all of the healthy foods they mandate to be purchased and send them directly to a landfill or mulch pile. Our government at work. I suggest we send the government busybodies to the landfill or mulch pile.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (UAMVq)

151 @140 Old lady to stewardess, hustling toward cockpit:
"Don't forget the coffee, dear."

Posted by: Just the Punchline at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (xq1UY)

152 The new school lunch menu is so bad....

How bad is it?

The kids miss the mystery meat.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (Urmiy)

153 Ramen noeles for thee. Wagyu beef and lobster for me.

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (QeH9j)

154 artisnal - You owe me. Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 11:19 AM (aDwsi) yes *hugs*

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (IXrOn)

155 Food pyramid has to be boostrapped by caffeine. Without caffeine, life has no meaning.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (aDwsi)

156 Anybody ever notice we didn't have an obesity epidemic until the gummint started telling us what to eat?

Posted by: --- at March 15, 2014 07:27 AM (Gm47B)

157 148 Where's the (hobo) beef?! Posted by: SOCR the Lurker at March 15, 2014 11:26 AM (EkAxJ) I believe the proper term is "long pig."

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:28 AM (UAMVq)

158 Yikes. Noodles.

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:28 AM (QeH9j)

159 I don't like bourbon! Can I substitute pizza and bacon, or do I need to replace it with something like Glenfiddich?

Posted by: Mallfly at March 15, 2014 07:29 AM (bJm7W)

160 Anybody ever notice we didn't have an obesity epidemic until the gummint started ~~telling us what to eat~~ feeding us? Posted by: --- at March

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:29 AM (aDwsi)

161 142 121- my grandmother was on ebt for a few months before she finally moved in with us ( many years ago). She was allowed 35 dollars a month. She was put out that healthy young men were coming in and getting 200-300 a month, when she was completely disabled. Which is why we finally convinced her to move in with my parents and let us take care of her. Posted by: moki at March 15, 2014 11:25 AM (EvHC

--------------------------- Yep. That's bureaucracy for you. Those that really need help often don't get it, while those who do not need it rake in the bennies.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at March 15, 2014 07:30 AM (dfYL9)

162 159 I don't like bourbon! Can I substitute pizza and bacon, or do I need to replace it with something like Glenfiddich? Posted by: Mallfly at March 15, 2014 11:29 AM (bJm7W) Or 4-16oz. of Everclear for your RDA.

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:31 AM (QeH9j)

163 159 I don't like bourbon! Fuckin' RINO

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:31 AM (UAMVq)

164 OK, foodies, I gotta go get ready for my gig this afternoon at the biker bar down by the river. Y'all have fun and try not to trash the place, 'k?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit[/i][/u][/b][/s] at March 15, 2014 07:31 AM (0HooB)

165

It would be nice if we could rely on the numbers being accurate, but we can't.

If EBT cards are loaded with $500 a month, that's a lot of money. If you listen to liberal sources though, they make it sound like the average is closer to 12 cents, or some other such absurdly small number.

Which is closer to the truth? I really don't know.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 07:31 AM (TOk1P)

166 86 Anyone else in LA feel the earthquake just now? Posted by: Epobirs at March 15, 2014 11:15 AM (bPxS6) Three quakes. Within a few miles, occurring seconds apart. 4.4 near Taft. Ten seconds later 3.9 near Lake Castaic. 15 seconds later 4 near Lake Isabella. The San Andreas getting ready to give us our overdue 8+ event on the southern section?! http://www.data.scec.org/recenteqs/Maps/119-35.html

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at March 15, 2014 07:32 AM (8ekM1)

167 @156 Not that you'll ever get access to the studies anymore, but there used to be a case for tobacco not being as dangerous before the government took over and set up the "allotment" system, favoring certain high-yield hybrids...

Posted by: Stringer Davis at March 15, 2014 07:32 AM (xq1UY)

168 IF I win the coveted 'AOSHQ Platinum membership' is it...like for life or something? Oh, and another thing: How much would it cost to upgrade my Platinum membership to one with ampersand capability? I think that would be way cool!!! Would the ampersand upgrade be like, you know, like.....REAL EXPENSIVE???

Posted by: Intimidated Girl Scout at March 15, 2014 07:34 AM (V0j3u)

169 I just about had a rage stroke a few years ago when this grotesque morbidly obese woman with two grocery carts overflowing in the line in front of me pulled out and EBT card to pay for her crap.

I could have fed my family for 3 months on what she had there.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 07:34 AM (T2V/1)

170 135 I think I might spend about $250-$300 a month on groceries. I don't buy shmancy organics and buy a lot of fruit. In season, it's less expensive and tastes better. Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 11:24 AM (N/cFh) Right now, my wife and I spend $125/month on just apples. Actually, I believe it's more.

Posted by: jwest at March 15, 2014 07:34 AM (u2a4R)

171 Speaking of EBT, I drove by a Burlington Coat Factory the other day and apparently they accept EPT cards. Because you can eat clothes or something.

Posted by: Lauren at March 15, 2014 07:34 AM (hFL/3)

172 You don't like bourbon?

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:34 AM (ilcz0)

173 Never mind. Just one quake. Looks like they originally listed the same event from 3 different monitoring stations.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at March 15, 2014 07:35 AM (8ekM1)

174 Lauren pretty soon we well be able buy stuff off Amazon with the EBT card....

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 07:35 AM (Urmiy)

175 EAT YOUR PEAS!!!

Posted by: Barak (Pea Brain) Obama at March 15, 2014 07:35 AM (V0j3u)

176 172 You don't like bourbon? ------- Burn the heretic!

Posted by: Moron Horde at March 15, 2014 07:35 AM (Aif/5)

177 Shit just keeps getting wierder with MH 370

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:36 AM (ilcz0)

178

176 -

I love bourbon.

Problem is, bourbon don't love me.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 07:36 AM (TOk1P)

179 #166

I'm in Castaic, so that one was pretty local.

Posted by: Epobirs at March 15, 2014 07:36 AM (bPxS6)

180

Lessee . . . cheesy, crunchy, greasy, salty, sweet, chewy, creamy, and bourbon.

There's yer pyramid right there.

Posted by: Count de Monet at March 15, 2014 07:37 AM (BAS5M)

181 What kind of sick mind comes up with a color scheme like this choosemyplate monstrosity? My tax dollars at work.

Posted by: Fritz at March 15, 2014 07:38 AM (UzPAd)

182 Where is 7-11 pizza on MyPlate? 'Cause they really push the fact you can use EBT now.

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:38 AM (QeH9j)

183 171Â Speaking of EBT, I drove by a Burlington Coat Factory the other day and apparently they accept EPT cards. Because you can eat clothes or something. Posted by:Â LaurenÂ at March 15, 2014 11:34 AM (hFL/3) ---------- Well, I just read yesterday (was it here or weasel zippers?) that some "adult toy store" has posted a sign on the front door stating that they now accept EBT. And BurtTC, I can only tell you the truth as I've experienced it. I know I laughed out loud when that stupid campaign came out with all the limousine liberals were tweeting pics of their lunches - nowhere near the truth.

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:39 AM (CYqDc)

184 146?

GnuBreed ?

This^

The story of Ã˜-Merica....

Posted by: backhoe at March 15, 2014 07:39 AM (ULH4o)

185

180 -

No, I think thems the guys what have a sleeping/dead princess in a glass coffin at their place.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 07:39 AM (TOk1P)

186 Minnfidel, I am seeing a lot of tinfoil hats and contradictory information.

So I am ignoring it.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 07:40 AM (Urmiy)

187 We spend a shockingly high amount on food every week, but we have a large family.

Posted by: Lauren at March 15, 2014 07:40 AM (hFL/3)

188 Well, I just read yesterday (was it here or weasel zippers?) that some "adult toy store" has posted a sign on the front door stating that they now accept EBT. Well, some lube is edible after all. I wonder where that fits on the Choose Your Plate scheme?

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:40 AM (UAMVq)

189 Buleit Bourbon is tasty!

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:41 AM (ilcz0)

190 189 Buleit Bourbon is tasty! Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 11:41 AM So is their rye.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:42 AM (UAMVq)

191

183 -

Right, I'm not disputing your information, but it is anecdotal. The problem is, we have sources of data that would suggest the average is something like $22 a month, I think.

It's a low number like that. I just don't know how accurate it is, and how it gets calculated. Statistics, as we are told over and over and over again, can be downright lies in the hands of people who wish to push their agenda.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 07:43 AM (TOk1P)

192 I didn't see any fat people on that site. Why does the Obama Administration hate fat people?

Posted by: Fritz at March 15, 2014 07:43 AM (UzPAd)

193 Ketchup is at the apex

Posted by: TexasJew at March 15, 2014 07:43 AM (U+u4A)

194 Anna - Same here. Until the plane is found, it is *all* speculation. I don't even trust the data. It's all 2nd-3rd hand, and from various dubious sources.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:44 AM (aDwsi)

195 WHY do these interfering 'do-gooders' always include broccoli as part of our daily diet? Let's face it, broccoli SUX and therefore does not belong in anybody's diet.

Posted by: alwyr at March 15, 2014 07:44 AM (V0j3u)

196 I would like to talk about the politics of food. So would my wifey.

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at March 15, 2014 07:44 AM (Dwehj)

197 Back when both my wife and I were eating my grocery bill usually ran about $500/month but that included a lot of steak and also my beer. I have no idea what it is now, probably a lot lower. I rarely have steak anymore because I don't want to eat it around wifey who can not have any.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 07:44 AM (T2V/1)

198 Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 11:39 AM (CYqDc) Regarding the adult store- "The Louisiana Purchase card is not just for food stamps, a Department of Children and Family Services said, adding that there are also cash benefits available for Â“other family needs.Â” See, it's a need.

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:45 AM (QeH9j)

199 I like broccoli, especially with cheese sauce.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 07:45 AM (T2V/1)

200 I here you Ana Puma. I figured it splashed. But that it was still transmitting sat data is curious. The transponder was shut down on purpose. Nobody is claiming it in the name of snackbar. So if they were going to crash it you would think they would have announced in flight they had the plane and then crashed it.

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:46 AM (ilcz0)

201 And food prices have definitely been going up, not that the MSM that was so focused in fluctuations of gas prices during Bush's presidency have bothered to cover it.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 07:46 AM (aq/zi)

202

195 -

I love broccoli, when it is prepared correctly. My problem is, I can't prepare it correctly. So opening a bag of cheetos is easier, with less chance I will mess it up.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 07:46 AM (TOk1P)

203 198 Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 11:39 AM (CYqDc) Regarding the adult store- "The Louisiana Purchase card is not just for food stamps, a Department of Children and Family Services said, adding that there are also cash benefits available for Â“other family needs.Â” See, it's a need. Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 11:45 AM (QeH9j) Buttplugs, dongers and porn. A matter of survival.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:46 AM (UAMVq)

204 I don't see beer! How can you possibly live without beer?

Posted by: PMRich at March 15, 2014 07:46 AM (x/BtJ)

205 here's the cooking guide the Chicago way make meat then deep fry it then potatoes then deep fry it then deep fry them together smother in gravy eat and enjoy then have your first heart attack at 30ish

Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 07:46 AM (At8tV)

206 I haven't tried Buleit's rye. Ill have to do some market research.

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:47 AM (ilcz0)

207 201 And food prices have definitely been going up, not that the MSM that was so focused in fluctuations of gas prices during Bush's presidency have bothered to cover it.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 11:46 AM (aq/zi)

The obamanites have finally admitted yesterday that food prices are going up, but only since the start of 2014. IOW they are still lying shit-heals.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 07:47 AM (T2V/1)

208

199 -

And that is where I would part company with you. To me, if you put the words "cheese" and "sauce" that close together, you've lost me.

Cheese is cheese. You can melt it, or you can make it an ingredient in other things, but it should NEVER be a sauce.

Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 07:48 AM (TOk1P)

209 >>See, it's a need.

Edible undies?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 07:48 AM (aq/zi)

210 206 I haven't tried Buleit's rye overrated imho

Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 07:48 AM (At8tV)

211 Broccoli can be VERY good. Especially with hollandaise. There is a local seafood joint here that goes through tons of broccoli every day - they steam it *perfectly* and serve it with a wonderful hollandaise. Now I want Surf Rider crabcakes for lunch...

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:49 AM (CYqDc)

212 208 199 - And that is where I would part company with you. To me, if you put the words "cheese" and "sauce" that close together, you've lost me. Cheese is cheese. You can melt it, or you can make it an ingredient in other things, but it should NEVER be a sauce. Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 11:48 AM (TOk1P) --- You're dead to me.

Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 07:49 AM (N/cFh)

213 I like broccoli, especially with cheese sauce. Posted by: Vic at March 15, 2014 11:45 AM (T2V/1) I like broccoli, too. My veggie lasagna I made a few days ago (which lasted 3 nights) had broccoli, carrots and mushrooms. I steamed a whole bunch of broccoli. So good smothered in ricotta and mozzarella!

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 07:50 AM (IXrOn)

214 209 >>See, it's a need. Edible undies? Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 11:48 AM (aq/zi) What do you pair that with? Chilled Astroglide or room temperature KY?

Posted by: RWC at March 15, 2014 07:50 AM (QeH9j)

215 The MFM won't mention any negatives like delaying 404care. Food or gas prices real unemployment Etc. they're waiting on all these stories until Or if the Reps. Get the senate. Book it.

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:50 AM (ilcz0)

216 >>The obamanites have finally admitted yesterday that food prices are going up, but only since the start of 2014.

Riiight, so it has nothing to do with Obama's first term. So will they be railing against greedy "Big Food" next?

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 07:51 AM (aq/zi)

217 212 - Harsh

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:51 AM (aDwsi)

218 208 Cheese is cheese. You can melt it, or you can make it an ingredient in other things, but it should NEVER be a sauce or ever worn on a head yeah, I went there

Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 07:51 AM (At8tV)

219 Want more of something, subsidize. Want less of something, tax it.

Posted by: Dr. Lugnut at March 15, 2014 07:51 AM (YBusZ)

220 From the morning thread

32 Fed finally admits we have "inflation" but only since 2014. They are, as usual, full of shit.

http://tinyurl.com/o8vb5yc

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 07:52 AM (T2V/1)

221 Posted by: navycopjoe at March 15, 2014 11:51 AM (At8tV) Hey now.

Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 07:52 AM (oMKp3)

222 Cheese. All kinds of cheese. And not just on the pizza, but probably not on the ice cream....

Posted by: Jenk at March 15, 2014 07:53 AM (e2ysZ)

223 Where's MUFF PIE in the pyramid? That needs to be a food group by itself.

Posted by: Me at March 15, 2014 07:53 AM (03BQI)

224 Oh, and Bulleit bourbon is my favorite, by far. But it's a rare treat these days. Maybe if I skip the electric bill this month I can go get a bottle, then have an awesome lunch? Hmmm...

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 07:53 AM (CYqDc)

225 Want more of something, subsidize. Want less of something, tax it. Posted by: Dr. Lugnut --------------- Social Engineering! Is there anything it can't do?

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 07:53 AM (aDwsi)

226 207?
Vic?

The economy here tanked when it was obvious Duh!1 would be coronated. It's still in the tank. Real estate dead. Businesses still dropping like flies. It's awful.

Posted by: backhoe at March 15, 2014 07:53 AM (ULH4o)

227
I think vegetable is really code for beer.

Posted by: YIKES! at March 15, 2014 07:54 AM (mETGQ)

228 217 212 - Harsh Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 11:51 AM (aDwsi) --- Have we not met?

Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 07:55 AM (N/cFh)

229 Please do not mention buttplugs... I am still reeling from that link of zombies on an ONT... the MLP:FIM style buttplugs... *thud* *twitch* *ack*

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 07:56 AM (Urmiy)

230 If anyone gave me $500/mo. I would (optimumly) split it 60% booze/40% cigarettes. If I'm looking for variety? No problem! I'd just reverse this split.

Posted by: Not Your Everyday Dietician at March 15, 2014 07:56 AM (V0j3u)

231 Mike by the time the wreckage is found and the final report issued, we will be in the same waters as TWA 800 when Pierre Salinger claimed a US missile shot it down.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 07:57 AM (Urmiy)

232 Beer is made from hops and barley. See, veggies!

Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 07:57 AM (ilcz0)

233 224 Oh, and Bulleit bourbon is my favorite, by far. But it's a rare treat these days. Maybe if I skip the electric bill this month I can go get a bottle, then have an awesome lunch? Hmmm... Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 11:53 AM (CYqDc) Wild Turkey is my very favorite bourbon by a huge margin. It is somewhat expensive, but like a wise man once said: good shit ain't cheap and cheap shit ain't good.

Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 07:57 AM (afNM6)

234 232 Beer is made from hops and barley. See, veggies! Posted by: Minnfidel at March 15, 2014 11:57 AM (ilcz0) Then why do I call PBR a pork chop in a can?

Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 07:58 AM (afNM6)

235 Cheese is cheese. You can melt it, or you can make it an ingredient in other things, but it should NEVER be a sauce. Posted by: BurtTC at March 15, 2014 11:48 AM (TOk1P) eh? chili con queso mornay alfredo fondue bechamel ...

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at March 15, 2014 07:58 AM (IXrOn)

236 234 Then why do I call PBR a pork chop in a can? Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 11:58 AM (afNM6) PBR doesn't count as beer.

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 07:59 AM (UAMVq)

237 231?

AP?

Best I could tell from web info a US "standard missile" shot it down.

Posted by: backhoe at March 15, 2014 07:59 AM (ULH4o)

238 >>chili con queso
mornay
alfredo
fondue
bechamel

* * *
Mac 'n cheese
welsh rarebit
raclette

nom, nom, nom

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 07:59 AM (aq/zi)

239 187 We spend a shockingly high amount on food every week, but we have a large family. Posted by: Lauren at March 15, 2014 11:40 AM (hFL/3) The cost of fuel to farm and transport it has driven costs up. But the asshole in the whitehouse doesn't give a shit and only wants to see it go higher.

Posted by: The Yellow Pug at March 15, 2014 08:00 AM (r7mtu)

240 To be usable in all regions: change Bourbon to Liquor or Alcohol to be more general. Otherwise my usual Single Malt, Pinot Noir and Stoli would not have a place. Valu-Rite should be Take-out Vegetables => Fruit / Veggie

Posted by: RKinRoanoke at March 15, 2014 08:00 AM (b0n8A)

241 Basically, the 'ettes are all "Fuck YEAH cheese".

Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 08:00 AM (N/cFh)

242 241 Basically, the 'ettes are all "Fuck YEAH cheese". Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 12:00 PM (N/cFh) Moron vote for cheese here. Fresh Parmesan FTW!

Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 08:01 AM (UAMVq)

243 241 Basically, the 'ettes are all "Fuck YEAH cheese". Posted by: Gingy @GingyNorth at March 15, 2014 12:00 PM (N/cFh) Without bacon, cheese and alcohol, I would surely die.

Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 08:02 AM (afNM6)

244 104 Hmm. Just realized today is the Ides of March. Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 11:19 AM (aDwsi) Think I'll sharpen my knife.

Posted by: BignJames at March 15, 2014 08:02 AM (ZNQKl)

245 Best I could tell from web info a US "standard missile" shot it down. Posted by: backhoe ---------------- AP? What!..., not an 'assault missile'?

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 08:02 AM (aDwsi)

246 129 Can I demand your pyramid include space for SOME (one) of Michelle Obama's "School Lunch Essentials".....Or am I being too "bossy"? Posted by: Intimidated Girl Scout at March 15, 2014 11:23 AM (V0j3u) You can stick your jicama chips and fat free Ranch dip where the sun don't shine. Posted by: Insomniac at March 15, 2014 _______________________ Insomniac: That was both bossy and intimidating. I'm going to suggest to Michelle O that she report you to the IRS....assuming they don't have bigger fish to fry at the moment. (fish is good, too) Intimidated Girl Scout

Posted by: Intimidated Girl Scout at March 15, 2014 08:02 AM (V0j3u)

247 http://tinyurl.com/nsk2n5n

MSM wants people to believe the labor force participation numbers are due primarily to retiring boomers but this is a blatant lie.

Posted by: Epobirs at March 15, 2014 08:02 AM (bPxS6)

248 ...Moochelle's lead-infused arugula patch...

Now THAT is a disturbing mental image.

Posted by: johnd01 at March 15, 2014 08:03 AM (r0+v0)

249 "What's on your menu?"

"Cheese, meat, potatoes and cheese."

"You said cheese twice."

"I like cheese...."

Posted by: Jenk at March 15, 2014 08:03 AM (e2ysZ)

250 The current food pyramid is nothing of a sort. It is an unusable, overly complex process called ChooseMyPlate. I defy anyone to glean any useful (or even correct) information in simple form from this website. What in the hell was wrong with the Four Food Groups? That's what I was taught when I was in school in the 1960s. Funnily enough, we didn't have an obesity epidemic back then. For those of you below the age which I will allow to stay on my lawn, the Four Food Groups were Meat, Dairy, Fruits & Vegetables, and Grains. The graphic was a circle divided into four equal parts, so no group was considered more important than any other. We were taught to try to eat something from each group at every meal. This was known as a "balanced diet". Easy peasy. But no. The government had to improve on it.

Posted by: rickl at March 15, 2014 08:04 AM (sdi6R)

251
Vegetables?

Vegetables are not food. Vegetables are what food eats.

Fish are fast vegetables.

Fruit is vegetables that fool you by tasting good.

Mushrooms are what grows on vegetables after food is done with them.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 15, 2014 08:05 AM (AHzA7)

252 Some EBT card recipients get a certain portion of benefits loaded onto their cards in ca$h (up to around $400/mo) plus their food loading.

There are no restrictions on where the cash can be spent, though I guess TPTB can refuse to allow cash EBT transactions at places like casinos and liquor stores.

Also, food allowances vary from state to state; in MS. it is around $100 per person per month, while in places with higher cost of living it can be as high as nearly $150/mo/person.

Posted by: GnuBreed at March 15, 2014 08:05 AM (cHZB7)

253 Standard missile?

As in the SM-2? Or perhaps the Standard ARM?

Very generic isn't it?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 08:05 AM (Urmiy)

254 >>Basically, the 'ettes are all "Fuck YEAH cheese".

YES.

Posted by: Lizzy at March 15, 2014 08:05 AM (aq/zi)

255 The cost of fuel to farm and transport it has driven costs up. But the asshole in the whitehouse doesn't give a shit and only wants to see it go higher. Posted by: The Yellow Pug ------------------------------------ No problem..., just maintain the subsidies for ethanol. It's a threefer. More expensive fuel, more crowing about 'green' subsidies, more expensive food, more dependency, more, more, more.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at March 15, 2014 08:05 AM (aDwsi)

256 Without bacon, cheese and alcohol, I would surely die. Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 12:02 PM (afNM6) ------------ I'm thinking potato skins for lunch now... but too much trouble. I'll just open this beer and contemplate.

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 08:06 AM (CYqDc)

257 On my last birthday, Slow Uncle Joe and the girls surprised me with a 5-tier Communist Manifesto birthday cake.

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at March 15, 2014 08:07 AM (Dwehj)

258 Please do not mention buttplugs... I am still reeling from that link of zombies on an ONT... the MLP:FIM style buttplugs... *thud* *twitch* *ack* "MLP:FIM?" I couldn't find the link and I can't decipher your acronym.

Posted by: Grey Fox at March 15, 2014 08:08 AM (MMgj0)

259 Nood.

Posted by: Y-not at March 15, 2014 08:08 AM (zDsvJ)

260 All this talk of cheese is making me want to travel to Sam's Club for some KerryGold cheese....

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 08:08 AM (Urmiy)

261 (Grammie W @ 149): WHAT IS A PEOPLE'S GARDEN? (From the website) People's Gardens vary in size and type, but all are required to have three components in common. They must benefit the community, in some cases by creating recreational spaces and in others by providing a harvest for a local food bank or shelter. They must be collaborative - that is, the garden must be created and maintained by a partnership of local individuals, groups, or organizations. And third, they should incorporate sustainable practices. The gardens might use compost or mulch made by participants. They might contain native plants or encourage beneficial insects. They also might exemplify water conservation, for instance, capturing rain in a barrel to water the garden. Gardens located at private residences are not eligible to become People's Gardens. You can declare an existing garden as a People's Garden as long as it incorporates the three components. Posted by: grammie winger at March 15, 2014 11:26 AM (oMKp3) _______________________________ Grammie, I read this drivel and found it SCARY. Then I started wondering: Maybe it's just ME???

Posted by: alwyr at March 15, 2014 08:09 AM (V0j3u)

262 I just made fried potatoes, sausage and eggs. Is that all right with Michelle?

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at March 15, 2014 08:09 AM (Ig5RI)

263 Pancakes. Sausage. Cheese. Beer. How the frak were those left out?

Posted by: eman at March 15, 2014 08:09 AM (AO9UG)

264 Grey Fox you are better for not knowing. Not even 55 gallons of brain bleach and 2,500 ft of mental floss has not eradicated it from my brain.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at March 15, 2014 08:09 AM (Urmiy)

265 My Little Pony, grey fox. I don't know what the FIM part means, but I was on that ONT - you really don't want to know.

Posted by: shredded chi at March 15, 2014 08:10 AM (CYqDc)

266 garden thread

Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 15, 2014 08:10 AM (T2V/1)

267 You forgot the friggin caviar.

Posted by: moochelle's big butt at March 15, 2014 08:11 AM (eQYKh)

268 Oh, and stay out of my garden people. It is MINE!

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at March 15, 2014 08:11 AM (Ig5RI)

269 261 Grammie, I read this drivel and found it SCARY. Then I started wondering: Maybe it's just ME??? Posted by: alwyr at March 15, 2014 12:09 PM (V0j3u) It's not just you. That is straight-up Communism, of the Mao or Pol Pot variety.

Posted by: rickl at March 15, 2014 08:13 AM (sdi6R)

270 245?

Mike?

There was video- that got scoured from the web- showing a streak of light flying up and hitting 800. Who knows where it came from? But military Ops were being held at the same time.

Posted by: backhoe at March 15, 2014 08:13 AM (ULH4o)

271 Where's the chocolate?
Posted by: alexthechick - come for the Global Warming stay for the SMOD
===
Here's the deal:

CBD built the Man Food Pyramid (MFP). If you want chocolate, you build a Wimmen Food Pyramid (WFP). If you think that's unreasonable, then I'd suggest you add chocolate and sammiches. Sammiches mit bacon. Go easy on the bread.

Posted by: mrp at March 15, 2014 08:14 AM (JBggj)

272 Grammie, I read this drivel and found it SCARY. Then I started wondering: Maybe it's just ME??? Posted by: alwyr at March 15, 2014 12:09 PM (V0j3u) No, it's not just you. The first person who mentions "People's Garden" in front of me gets used as fertilizer for my garden.

Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 08:15 AM (afNM6)

273 Has anybody here besides me discovered the pure wholesome joy that is peanut butter on bacon?

Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 08:18 AM (afNM6)

274 I'm fond of Fritos dipped in peanut butter. You have to use Fritos Scoops, though. Regular Fritos aren't strong enough.

Posted by: rickl at March 15, 2014 08:22 AM (sdi6R)

275 Forgot pasta.

Posted by: Tuna at March 15, 2014 08:25 AM (M/TDA)

276 It's not just you. That is straight-up Communism, of the Mao or Pol Pot variety. Posted by: rickl at March 15, 2014 12:13 PM (sdi6R) __________ Instead of a 'People's Garden' would it be appropriate for me to install a 'People's Backyard Steel Furnace' (as long as it was really small and didn't contribute to Global Warming)?

Posted by: alwyr at March 15, 2014 08:27 AM (V0j3u)

277 Besides pasta, where's the potato chips and Doritos ?

Posted by: Tuna at March 15, 2014 08:28 AM (M/TDA)

278 From the gubmint site: Tip of the day- Offer children a choice of fruits for lunch. That's what these people come up with? Here's my suggestion for tomorrow's tip of the day: Feed your kids some protein. Here's my tip for the next day: Give your kids lunch every day. How much taxpayer money was wasted coming up with tips that you'd have to be dumber than dirt to not already know.

Posted by: nerdygirl at March 15, 2014 08:29 AM (mck3/)

279 Squeeze Scotch and pancakes into that pyramid and I'm with ya...

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars™ [/i] [/b] [/s] at March 15, 2014 08:29 AM (rpZ5G)

280 All college basketball all day on just about every sports related channel.'

Posted by: Lincolntf at March 15, 2014 08:29 AM (ZshNr)

281 13 Any site with an entry called "what is physical activity?" just has to be chock full of useful information. Posted by: Scanner Dan at March 15, 2014 10:52 AM (DHXV/) Well, that's easy to answer, it's that thing I do where I need $10,000 worth of birth control every year.

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at March 15, 2014 08:30 AM (mck3/)

282 280 Yup. Hubby eagerly awaiting OSU-Michigan game. We've played like poop all season but get this far in the tourney. Go figure

Posted by: Tuna at March 15, 2014 08:32 AM (M/TDA)

283 Getting ready to listen to the ACC games on the radio. Too nice to be inside all day.

Posted by: Lincolntf at March 15, 2014 08:35 AM (ZshNr)

284 In Texas, that bacon section becomes: BBQ, BBQ, Bacon and BBQ

Bourbon ----> Crown, Bourbon and Whiskey

Pizza ---> Mexican and Eye-talian Cheesy Stuff

Vegetables ---> Freedom Fries, Peppers and BBQ infused Spuds.

Posted by: phreshone at March 15, 2014 08:35 AM (Q6pxP)

285 You forgot to mention Chips and Guac. Chips are made out of corn and Guac is made out some kind of plant. That's healthy, right?

Posted by: Big McLargehuge at March 15, 2014 08:50 AM (Iz7Mq)

286 Also forgot soft drinks. Glaring omission .

Posted by: Tuna at March 15, 2014 08:53 AM (M/TDA)

287 The chart overstates veggies because it leaves out the "dessert" category.

Posted by: JTL at March 15, 2014 09:23 AM (1msEn)

288

Without bacon, cheese and alcohol, I would surely die. Posted by: model_1066 at March 15, 2014 12:02 PM (afNM6)

This. I enjoy my bacon every Sunday morning, the only day when I have time to cook bacon, eggs and toast.

rickl: Yep. I lost 40 pounds doing that old-fashioned "balanced diet" thing. Admittedly, it took forever, but I'm sorta past the age where I have to lose 7 pounds by next Friday to get into the prom dress. I am very suspicious of any diet which makes one particular food group Evil. Couldn't live without the occasional plate of linguine and clam sauce.It's very hard for Americans - including me, believe me - to grasp the whole idea of moderation. Some food always has to be labeled The Devil - red meat, eggs, fat, carbs, whatever.

Posted by: Donna and V. (no ampersand) at March 15, 2014 09:29 AM (R3gO3)

289 That "ChooseMyPlate" site works better than Obama's HealthCare site, and it just about as useful. (Note: in the gubmint dictionary, usefull=useless)

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I amn't at March 15, 2014 09:31 AM (fJqq3)

290 227
I think vegetable is really code for beer.

=========
Nah, beer is grains.

Posted by: Ranba Ral at March 15, 2014 09:34 AM (G99e4)

291 290 Nah, beer is grains. Posted by: Ranba Ral at March 15, 2014 01:34 PM (G99e4) Hops are flowers, so that's got the vegetable food group covered. Two out of four ain't bad.

Posted by: rickl at March 15, 2014 09:52 AM (sdi6R)

292 with advent of the bacon bowl, the greatest invention since the wheel, btw. It is obvious that the bowl from which you will eat your salad, will be bacon, that is unless you belong to some death cult religion, in which case, your salad is some kinda hand shaped bowl from a substance resembling play-doh which comes in a wrapper with the word semtex on it.

I digress. The point being that the vegetable block should have a bacon mortar line under it.

Also one other small quibble. While steak's placement looks approximately correct (depending on your income), lets face facts, chicken and fish can make great appetizers prior to a steak main course, so they should be in there somewhere. I also like to serve pork dish when new guests are around, just to see if any death cultists are trying to infiltrate my sphere. Bacon can be a great wedge to turn a suicide bomber against his secret cell.

Posted by: plithy at March 15, 2014 10:07 AM (fNxEg)

293 Somehow my web services provider has managed to cut off the chocolate and coffee food groups. ? ?

Posted by: Robert17 at March 15, 2014 10:12 AM (bGQeu)

294 Get rid of vegetables. They are on the pizza.

Substitute: "chocolate"

Posted by: shibumi at March 15, 2014 10:17 AM (25HWz)

295 Solid fats provide little to no nutrients according to the Fed? Jesus... no wonder we're a nation of stupid lardasses. The people writing those recommendations obviously have never achieved optimal brain development because their stupid parents fed them a low fat diet.

Posted by: Government workers are stupid at March 15, 2014 11:31 AM (BSZBT)

296 Where's the beer??!!

Posted by: CADDaddy at March 15, 2014 11:33 AM (4Zd/k)

297 The 4 food groups were easy to understand, worked, and gave good nutrition. Why change it? Because activist groups insisted on their version of eating be enforced by the federal government.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at March 15, 2014 12:04 PM (zfY+H)

298 Challenge Accepted: the useful information I gleaned from the link was that there is no limit to how complicated government can make things. Also, it would appear that who ever designed that website, though impractical, was leaps ahead of healthcare.gov in terms of functionality.

Posted by: Xanderphife at March 15, 2014 12:22 PM (17LvX)

299 I don't know what Valu-rite is and I'm too proud to google it. In my personal pyramid, beer displaces bourbon (value-equal, IMHO), and I just put more bacon where that valu-rite thing is.....unless valu-rite is some code-word for Kate Upton, of course.

Posted by: Dolly Madison at March 15, 2014 06:02 PM (Em374)

300 I really don't swing that way, darling...

Posted by: Kate Upton at March 15, 2014 06:03 PM (Em374)

301 Not near enough bacon. I don't know how you people think a fellow could get by on that.

Posted by: E Pluribus Unum at March 15, 2014 06:07 PM (Em374)

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