Deadspin has some background.

Via DrewM.

Posted by: Ace at 08:26 AM | Comments (24)
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Ahem. I think a lot of people in America are similarly tortured by headache inducing fluorescent office lights.

Quick, let's let him free so our nation can begin to heal and recover its honor.

In related news, Andrew Sullivan claims he's being tortured by declining web traffic.

Posted by: Ace at 07:28 AM | Comments (40)
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Well.

Jeeze, man. I'm sorry I haven't done my part in throwing enough invective at Hillary. Sometimes I get busy, yannow? This busty lesbian porn isn't going to download itself.

I'm so glad that Obama is beyond race and everything. And will heal us with his post-racial paladin power of laying on hands. Obviously, once Obama's president, all the anger and distress over race will be extirpated and we will be born again without racial sin, as if in a Godspell revival starring Lenny Kravitz as Jesus Christ and Lisa Bonet as Mary Magdelane.

Doesn't this statement sorta, um, prove Geraldine Ferraro is right? Isn't the meaning of this statement that Obama is more qualified than Hillary simply because he knows what it means (kinda sorta) to be black (kinda sorta)?

Food for thought from the WSJ: Is Obama a little too quick, and a little too cynical, to play the race card?

No. Of course not. That's just crazy-talk, that's all that is.

We're not suggesting that the Obama campaign has never been justified in crying foul over racially tinged remarks out of the Clinton camp....

But for all of Mr. Obama's soaring rhetoric about the nation's need for a post-racial politics that "brings the American people together," his campaign at times has seemed overly sensitive about race. It also seems to want it both ways. Mr. Obama claims that his brand of politics transcends race, but at the same time he's using race as a shield to shut down important and legitimate arguments.

Already, prominent Obama sympathizers, such as Harvard's Orlando Patterson, are detecting racial overtones where none exist. In a New York Times op-ed this week, Mr. Patterson said a Clinton political ad designed to question Mr. Obama's readiness as Commander in Chief contained a "racist sub-message" because none of the people depicted in the TV spot are black. Counting people of color in an ad about national security is hardly consistent with the Obama theme that "race doesn't matter."

Slublog got an exclusive leak-- the Obama Rolling Stone cover as it was originally supposed to be, featuring the Yoko Ono of American elective politics.

I dig it. They should have gone with this one.

(That's a parody of a famous Lennon-Ono cover, by the way. Scary: the naked body is actually Lennon's. It's the tiny Asian woman in the black sweater.)

God Damn America: Not God Bless America. God Damn America.

I haven't watched this yet, but Obama's very nice Christian pastor who is just wonderful and you shouldn't pay attention to him at all seems rather down on our nation.

Barack Obama: "I don't think my church is particularly controversial."

Of course you don't darling. You don't think taking high tea with terrorists is controversial either.

Power to the people, brother.

Posted by: Ace at 06:43 AM | Comments (62)
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ABCNews and even Katie Couric managed to do so once, at least.

But NBCNews? The most unashamedly partisan network on TV?

Nope. By NBC's lights, Elliot Spitzer belongs to the Crusading Prosecutor Party. Or maybe the Man Who Fell Due To His Own Personal Failings and Whose Flaws Cannot Possibly Reflect Whatsoever On His Political Party Party.

Here's a related complaint: When the left makes an issue of media failings, the MSM falls over itself to either 1) correct those alleged failings or 2) defend themselves and claim they're doing their jobs just fine.

Steven Colbert poked fun at the media for being (hah!) lapdogs for Bush. They all vowed to be tougher and stop giving him the free pass he'd enjoyed for five years. SNL, which is basically just Newsweek's Conventional Wisdom Watch with recurring characters, knocked the media for fawning over Barack Obama. Suddenly they decided they had to start actually covering Obama like a political candidate rather than the Risen Christ.

On the right, we've been knocking the "Obamessiah" goofery for a frigging year. Did anyone notice? Nope. It took the left-wing crew at SNL to get the media's attention.

They don't even bother responding to us on the right, even in a clear-cut and provable systemic and deliberate case of a bias such as this. They don't even bother defending themselves. They just ignore us. Because they're not even reading us and even if they did, what we think just doesn't matter.

When various leftist bloggers attack MSM figures, the response is usually fairly immediate. Joe Klein spent weeks defending himself from lefty attacks; Paul Krugman just posted a blog entry defending himself against the charge he had dared to deny the divinity of Barack Obama.

But they don't even bother acknowledging the most obviously-verifiable criticisms of the right. Not even an acknowledgment.

Politically, you are what you read, and culturally, you are whose opinions you give a crap about.

By their very reading habits and exquisite concern for the opinions of leftwing bloggers, they give the game away. I could spend three weeks attacking Joe Klein; I'd never get a response. Because not only is he not reading me, he also doesn't even know anyone who may be reading me and might forward my criticisms to him. And even if such a bizarre congruence of improbabilities to conspire together, he wouldn't bother responding because, hey, I'm just a nutty rightwinger and anything I have to say is, by definition, the ravings of dangerously insane schizophrenic.

Howard Kurtz styles himself as an objective media critic. He also covers blogs... mostly leftwing blogs, of course, but once in a while he'll drop a mention to Instapundit or Powerline.

Is he ever going to get around to addressing what is a clear and easily provable case of systematic MSM bias? Or is the problem for Howie that the case is so clear-cut and so damning that he dares not even mention it, for his liberal media pals not only have no defense for their behavior, but insist on continuing it?

Posted by: Ace at 06:28 AM | Comments (18)
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I never post these email funnies that go 'round, but this one is pretty good, and it comes from Mom, so...

Not my work. Just something I got sent. more...

Posted by: Ace at 06:08 AM | Comments (21)
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Petitedov links Vanity Fair's photoshoot with some funny and kinda-hot chicks in an effort to disprove Hitchens' thesis that women aren't funny. Or aren't very funny. Or whatever. He seems to shift his argument so often that ultimately he seems to be saying very little at all; he seems to have liked the big headline "Why Women Aren't Funny," but isn't terribly confident in the article it sits atop.

One odd moment that needs some background. In Hitchens' video reply, just before about midway through,Hitch allows that sure, there are some funny women, but most of those are "dykes, or hefty, or Jews," and there are only some "pretty" female comics now coming along.

Re-reading his original article, though, I see his intent here is to allow that there may be funny women, but they come from male traditions; lesbians are mannish, and Jewish humor, he says, is so aggressive and biting as to be pracitcally male whatever sex its used by. (Not sure where the "hefty" gals fit into this.) So he seems to allowing these exceptions exist, and they only exist because they are rooted in masculine humor, and, ergo, there is no authentic feminine humor that's actually funny.

Now, I mention this, because if you click on that vid, you might be a bit taken aback by Hitchens seemingly casual exclusion of "dykes" and "Jews" (and "hefty" women too) from the female sex altogether. I was; I started out this post asking what the hell he was trying to say here. Vanity Fair milks the comment by doing a sinister three stage zoom in as he says "dykes, or hefty, or Jews."

However, whether you agree with his point or not (and I don't -- he's just making shit up as he goes to be provocative, but there's no crime in that), it isn't the offhandedly brutal bit of antisemitism (and anti-lesbianism, and No Fat Chickery) it seems to be at first. He's just rescuing his point by setting those three categories apart and branding them a sub-type of male humor.

Anyway, more ammo for the gender war, I guess.

Man, is Kirstin Wiig cute. I would hit that like the cannonball hitting the fat guy's belly in slow motion.

By the way, I'm not really kissing up to women again in saying Hitchens is just making shit up. Of course man are more frequently funny than women, and of course men are funnier than women on average, and all the rest of it. I mean, duh.

But his original article claimed there were no funny women (except those male-ish dykes, Jews, and fatties), which is obviously just stupid.

Posted by: Ace at 08:22 PM | Comments (70)
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Steven Weber. Formerly famous person (is that fair? was he ever actually famous?) now blogging on the Huffington Post to keep his name vaguely "out there."

Rachel Lucas picks up his most obnoxiously sophomoric attempts at vivid, powerful writing from his latest excrescence; she says there's no need to actually read the column, and I believe her.

Here is some of the crap he typed, rather than wrote, as goes Capote's distinction.

I think it's about war, or politics, or something. Maybe wolves. Does it even matter?

Â…the Goya-esque moment where the giants bludgeoning each other, stuck knee deep in sludge, begin to spatter the tiny people at their feet with blood, bile and bilge

Â…the population has just come to after having ingested a roofie-laced order of Freedom Fries

Â…those most adept at hurling invective-laced loogies are doing so with bewilderingly less commitment and a significant decrease in phlegm

Â…the Old Guard has collected its booty in a stained pillow case and simply gone AWOL

Â…every volley of vitriol seems to slow in midair and fall to the ground with a tinny clatter

There's more, including the most absurd attempt at vivid, powerful writing of all, which I'm not even quoting because if I did you would all just assume I made it up again, as usual.

I use to write like that, Steve. In high school. My freshman year in college a professor told me to grow up and knock it the hell off.

You sound like a

1) pre-pubescent

2) girl

3) who's borderline retarded

and

4) isn't even particularly interesting for a prepubescent girl who's borderline retarded.

PS: I ripped off that headline gag from Just Shoot Me. I don't even think it makes sense out of context. I'm tired.

PPS: I know what he's doing now. He's attempting to emulate Keith Olberman and his very special brand of retard-rage commentary.

And... Good Lord, he's doing so poorly.

I didn't really know that someone could try to mimic Keith Olbermann and fail at it. How do you suck at trying to suck?

Ah well. We can't all be Tim Daly.

Bonus: Steven Weber's leavings also remind me of a particular style of juvenalia -- the eighth-grade boy's attempt at heavy metal songwriting.

So I've put together some of his most vivid, powerful images together into a heavy metal song an eighth grader might write. All is taken from Lucas. I can't waste my time actually reading his crap.

Weber's direct quotes are bolded italics. My contributions are just in regular italics.

This song is called "Ride My Dragon." more...

Posted by: Ace at 05:31 PM | Comments (51)
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InEVITAble.

Posted by: Ace at 03:07 PM | Comments (26)
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"Kristen," or Domino, or whatever she's calling herself.

She's gone up from $4300 on her back to $100,000 for a sit-down.

Not too bad.

Posted by: Ace at 02:58 PM | Comments (147)
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For how long will the racist media trade in age-old stereotypes about black physicality and bioluminescence?

God, it looks like Jack Kirby illustrating a William Faulkner novel.

I've changed my mind: I want Obama as the Democratic nominee. Not only is he much more beatable than I first thought -- corruption, that Marxist harpy of a wife -- but the media bias should he prevail will be (licks fingers) muah!, magnifique.

They're already melting the fuck down and the guy hasn't even beat the Yoko Ono of politics.

Well I guess Yoko Ono is the Yoko Ono of politics, too. The Yoko Ono of the Clinton Family Band, then.

I would not miss the media's full-on self-bukake for Obama for all the artificial vaginas in Japan.

They're already embarrassed by their own behavior -- but they can't help it. An Obama candidacy just might be the only thing capable of convincing these strutting ponce-buffoons of how foul, incompetent, and repulsively stupid they actually are.

Separated At Birth? DC Comics hero Black Lightning, who I think we used to know on SuperFriends as "Black Vulcan."

On the SuperFriends, Black Vulcan was there almost entirely because he was black. He basically did nothing at all except occasionally mouth gauzy inspirational platitudes.

Though they say he could electrify an audience.

No relation, I'm sure.

Judge Men By the Content of their Character, Not By the Electrostatic Buildup in their Clothing: Retired (not gay) writes:

All these halos, nimbuses, and cracklin' orgones in every big-media Obama photograph - that's not messianism, that's racism. Their inevitable appearance on the cover of the Honky Bible is just more evidence that America is still in thrall to the hoary white myth that black people don't use fabric softener.

My God, it's 2008, not 1958! Some of my best friends are black, and they almost all use StaticGuard!

Bigger Pic swiped from an Onion blog (I think), which also busts on Rolling Stone for their pot-addled religious zealotry.

Posted by: Ace at 01:31 PM | Comments (48)
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