I can't get the video to work, but so what, I know it's pure awesome.

MattM writes:

“Lions for Lambs,” “Redacted,” “In the Valley of Elah,” “Stop-Loss,” …. All is forgiven, Hollywood.

Here’s the red band (meaning R-rated) trailer for what will certainly be our generation’s greatest cinematic achievement: “Zombie Strippers.”

Unfortunately, it appears that the part of Jenna Jameson is being played by one of the lizard monsters from “V.” Other than that, genius.

Content Warning. It's called Zombie Strippers. It's not called A Pleasant Afternoon of Finger-Sandwiches and Croquet. more...

Posted by: Ace at 06:22 PM | Comments (42)
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I didn't film it. And I'm not "encouraging" it.

But it is going to bother a lot of you.

For reasons I cannot fathom, some snake handlers/parents thought it would be a pretty cool idea to square off a baby against a cobra.

If there's any good news here, it's that babies are apparently indestructible and this particular one has mongoose blood in her. She's not afraid of the cobra; quite the opposite.

Bad Taste/Child Endangerment Content Warning. No jokes on this one; it's a nasty crime in progress.

Defanged? Readers who are smarter than me point out that this, being a "performing cobra," is likely defanged. I thought the baby just had a tough noggin.

Obviously, that's still pretty bad. But a hell of a lot less bad. Guess I should have figured that out myself.
more...

Posted by: Ace at 04:20 PM | Comments (57)
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Strong Content Warning for Mature Themes including George Takei singing "On the Road Again." more...

Posted by: Ace at 03:56 PM | Comments (24)
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Not me. I'm an ether & catspaw man myself.

Prophet. Hero. American.

The stories unfold like scenes from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies, only this isn't Texas and the alleged victims claim the roaring sound of the chainsaw is very real.

For months, five homeless men have complained to the Fort Lauderdale Police Department that they have been terrorized by a local businessman known to them only as ``the Chainsaw Man.''

They say he chases them through fields and over railroad tracks, armed with a chainsaw, and has even shot at them with a pistol.

A Broward judge has ordered Stephen Sticht to stay away from the homeless men and relinquish any weapons -- including the chainsaw. But he may face criminal charges if civil rights and homeless advocates have their way.

Sticht denies the claims. He says the men are trying to get back at him for constantly calling the cops to discourage them from loitering near his home and construction-consultant business, which are off Dixie Highway near 13th Street in Fort Lauderdale.

He says he uses the chainsaw to cut down brush in the shaded areas where the men -- who have criminal records -- rest during the day and sleep at night. The ''gunshot'' the men heard may have been from his high-powered nail gun, he said.

''It's a witch hunt. These guys are crackheads,'' said Sticht, 49, whose business is a stone's throw from where the homeless men congregate. ``All these allegations are fabrications. It's like they came up with this grandiose story and now I am made out to be the bad guy.''

Brother, you're preaching to the choir.

Wanted posters with pictures of the homeless men and the words ''crackhead'' and ''male prostitute'' have been posted in storefronts and on light poles around Dixie Highway and 13th Avenue, an area notorious for high drug activity and crime.

Though Sticht denies having anything to do with the posters, the men have said he snapped pictures of them and threatened to make posters.

...

The recent allegations could encourage attacks on the homeless, Stoops said.

"Encourage attacks." Yeah, and a drug "pusher" really "pushes" drugs on an unwelcoming clientele too, eh?

Guys: Some products just sell themselves.

Thanks to Rittenhouse.

Posted by: Ace at 02:43 PM | Comments (41)
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This is just sad. First they cut the relay in half. Then they decided to avoid Chinatown. Now they've disappeared the torch.

As the ceremony began, the first torchbearer took the Olympic flame from a lantern brought to the stage and held it aloft before running into a warehouse. A motorcycle escort departed, but the torchbearer was nowhere in sight.

From local radio (sorry, no link), it appears that they drove it inland where two runners managed to take it for a while. Not even event participants know what's going on. Some protesters are scuffling, but mostly, several thousand people are just wandering around the city.

Isn't the whole point of this "journey of harmony" so that people can see the torch go by? They might as well call the whole thing off. After all, didn't the Nazi's create the Olympic torch relay?

Posted by: Gabriel Malor at 01:20 PM | Comments (65)
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Florida lawmakers pass bill allowing residents with licenses to keep their guns in a locked vehicle while at work.

The bill, allowing workers to keep guns in their cars for self-protection, was approved by the Florida Senate by a vote of 26-13. It now goes to Republican Gov. Charlie Crist to sign into law.

Eh. Ok, I guess, but I'm not really a big fan of leaving guns in a locked vehicle. If "something bad" happens, having a gun in my truck is almost useless.

But it's something, I guess.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 12:40 PM | Comments (38)
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I was saving pictures like this for a special occasion, but I guess my hand is forced.

Posted by: Ace at 11:52 AM | Comments (52)
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Well! If understanding other cultures was the goal, I'd say-- Mission Accomplished!

Surely they understand politicized, aggressive Islam more than most saps in Europe right now.

A cautionary note: While this site looks real enough, I've never heard of this news service before, so a big asterisk on this for now.

primary school in Amsterdam wished to provide its pupils with an understanding for other cultures. But during a visit to a mosque, the children were told they were dogs.

With a view to developing understanding and respect for other cultures among children, primary school De Horizon regularly organises outings to various religious organisations. The chairman of the El Mouchidine mosque told the children from group 7 (aged 10) and their chaperones however that non-Muslims are dogs.

In a letter to the children's parents, the school expresses its regret at the incident: "We are shocked that during the guided tour, the mosque's chairman told the children and chaperoning parents that non believers were dogs. We consider this statement as unacceptable since we allow our children to partake in this project to develop respect for freedom of religious choice."

Dude, that is the religion. Open your eyes.

One child's mother notes teh school is trying to "play this down," and finds that to be "the problem."

The problem is that this entire culture has a massive chip on its shoulder due to still basically living in the 1800's (if that -- minus the cargo cult bonanza of Western tech and savvy, who knows where they'd be).

And so many Muslims have decided to fetishize, out of deep insecurity and self-loathing, the one thing all Muslims are better at than Westerners: the practice of Islam as a religion.

You guys have lasers? Nanotech? Working on cancer cures? So bored of walking on the Moon no one even bothered watching the last couple of times?

Oh well we're really good at something else: praying to Allah.

Beat ya, chumps! How ya like me now?!

Thanks to RobG.

Posted by: Ace at 11:34 AM | Comments (65)
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Truther.

And drop-dead stupid.

He actually questions (in the first clip, second link) how on earth jet fuel could have possibly found its way the WTC's elevator shafts, because "elevator shafts are sealed, they always are" (sealed between floors? wouldn't that sort of impede the progress of the elevator slightly?) and that, in his considered opinion, "most of the jet fuel" was destroyed in the "initial hit."

Jesus.

I turned it off. I felt myself getting stupider by the minute.

He whines that he doesn't understand that when people say stupid, crazy shit other people note that they are stupid and crazy.

Jesse "The Mind" Ventura.

Hokay.

I'm getting a little tired of hearing these retards wonder why when something falls due to the force of gravity it seems to fall with the speed of gravity.

Um... yeah. It's very suspicious that when I throw a baseball it falls at the speed of gravity. It's almost as if... just hear me out on this... it's almost as if that falling objects are all governed by the same constant force of acceleration or something.

Posted by: Ace at 11:13 AM | Comments (92)
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Shrug. What did you expect?

Don't worry, it will be the same report they've been issuing for 40 years.

Thanks to CJ.

Posted by: Ace at 10:21 AM | Comments (17)
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