Good evening and welcome all morons, moronettes, and sub-moronettes!

Item #1: Carla Bruni Can Sing
Not only is Carla Bruni the hottest First Lady in the world, but she's an heiress, a former model, and a quite good singer.

Okay I'm finding myself really coming to like the French first couple which goes against everything I believe in. So maybe it is time for that brain MRI. more...

Posted by: Open Blog at 07:59 PM | Comments (4)
Post contains 193 words, total size 3 kb.

Let's just cut em out of our new health care system.

Home-spun humor. Hah hahah ... the wit.

one starts to wonder if the country wouldn't be better off without them and if Republicans should be cut out of the health-care system entirely and simply provided with aspirin and hand sanitizer. Thirty-two percent of the population identifies with the GOP, and if we cut off health care to them, we could probably pay off the deficit in short order.

Keillor ends his old fart bitch rant with something about let the younger people take charge and shut up that's why.

He really only means the old men who happen to think this health care crap is just that, crap. Not the old men who are working the procedural system to get it passed as an amendment to a finance bill.

But then you could always count on Garrison for lazy expression and meaningless cultural observation. It's been his bread and butter for 40 years.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 07:37 PM | Comments (22)
Post contains 190 words, total size 1 kb.

You know, ACORN, on the front lines of America's defense against Salvadoran sex-slavers, and doing a damn fine job of it too.

Posted by: Ace at 06:45 PM | Comments (18)
Post contains 48 words, total size 1 kb.

Why E!Online? Because the "little snippy bitch" who posted the tweet about RAPE IS RAPE chose the most unflattering picture of her to run against a good picture of the aging satyr Polanski. And, actually, as soon as I saw the picture, that was my reaction too: Could they editorialize a bit more?

Anyway, she went off in the comments.

Re: the writer, she speaks the truth:

"Mr. Josh is just another little snippy bitch who wouldn't talk against RP because he might lose his snippy bitch job..lol."

People in Hollywood and all affiliated parasitic industries are insecure -- for good reason. They really could lose everything for spurning the wrong person and not sucking up to the right person. Part of this grim spectacle is clueless artists who really do think that they have some artist's right of primae noctis*, but most of it is a lot of very insecure people, just barely able keeping a tenuous toehold on celebrity as it is, afraid to go against the ex cathedra declarations of the purported Hollywood elite.

Because, really, most writers and actors and directors and art designers really are more or less interchangable with at least 20 other similar substitutes, so anyone who defies The Collective is taking a chance.

There's a lot of that going on here. Which makes these statements by Luc Besson and Kirstie Alley critical, because they defy the morally-retarded pap taken as the official Media Party line and invite others to say "Enough with this bullshit. He's a rapist."

let's see..43 year old Director Roman Polanski put his ***** in a 13 year old girls ****** and then her ANUS after he gave her drugs and alcohol, while she was telling him to STOP..hmmm that's a tough one.."as (opposed to rape).." Have we really gotten so STUPID and TWISTED that we care what the CRIMINAL says he was doing? and do we REALLY think a 45 day stay in jail makes up for RAPING a child? Polanski was afraid he wouldn't get a FAIR TRIAL? hmmm ISN'T THAT WHAT ALL CRIMINALS SAY? I'm going to go bang my head on the floor..makes more sense than defending a RAPIST."

Garbled, but you get the gist.

Polanski was 44 and he spent 42 days in jail, by the way. Minor corrections.

Really, really bad picture of her offered up by this "little snippy bitch."

* Corrected: Obviously I didn't know the word they were using in Braveheart. Jack Bauer's Evil Brother tells me it's ius primae noctis.

Posted by: Ace at 05:52 PM | Comments (19)
Post contains 435 words, total size 3 kb.

No, really.

In her speech in Copenhagen today, First Lady Michelle Obama said her trip to Denmark, along with the travel of her “dear friend” and “chit-chat buddy” Oprah Winfrey, as well as tomorrow’s visit by President Obama, is a “sacrifice” on behalf of the children of Chicago and the United States. “As much of a sacrifice as people say this is for me or Oprah or the president to come for these few days,” the first lady told a crowd of people involved in the Chicago project, “so many of you in this room have been working for years to bring this bid home.”

Sacrifice.

I've never been proud of my country until now.

Copenhagen. Now, true, Copenhagen isn't one of the first ten European cities you think of when you think of vacation paradise. Still -- I'm pretty sure it's not that bad, especially not in early fall. It is, you know, a minor capital, and a major city in an advanced wealthy western nation.

I'm pretty sure they wear shoes there, and outbreaks of cholera are mostly contained.

And they have some copper statue of a mermaid or somethin'. With breasts. So, right there -- nice statue. Breasts. Worth the trip.

What sacrifices will the Divine Miss M sacrifice next? Hobnobbing with socially-conscious rock and roll icons? Jaunting off to Hollywood to fund-raise from beautiful and charismatic celebrities? Appearing as a goodwill ambassador at the Venice Film Festival?

What more do you demand of this woman? She's doing all she can. Who warms The Sun?

This sounds an awful lot like the hellish exile Roman Polanski spent in Paris.

Thanks to Slublog.

Credit: "Who warms the Sun?" comes from Just Shoot Me. Nina Van Horne, a similarly cluelessly entitled and self-centered woman, exclaims this in exasperation after doing a similarly minor task for someone (but mostly for herself).

In case you don't get it -- she's the Sun, providing warmth and light for us all without complaint. She just wants to know when, o when, anyone will ever warm her, she who makes the flowers bloom and the corn rise tall.

Posted by: Ace at 04:48 PM | Comments (20)
Post contains 432 words, total size 3 kb.

Not literally, but he was Edwards' most diligent and dedicated sycophant, at least according to this profile.

This falls into the category of "not important from a news perspective but kinda interesting and weird from a human perspective."

Worth reading in full. A deeply weird portrait, a cross between Dennis Finch from Just Shoot Me and the sycophantic psychopath Will Patton played in No Way Out.

And John and Elizabeth Edwards come off no better.

Young sometimes described himself as Edwards’s “special assistant” and dreamed of serving in an Edwards White House. Other aides, with a combination of disgust — and, perhaps, a bit of envy — referred to him as Edwards’s “personal servant,” or worse, Edwards’s “butt boy.” The relationship was so intense, at least on Young’s side, that it generated friction between him and Elizabeth Edwards....

“John was his idol — his hero — and probably who he considered his best friend and his mentor,” said Tim Toben, a former John Edwards supporter and friend of Young’s....

Young’s friends describe him simply as a “totally devoted” believer who was “taken advantage of,” in the words of one former staffer. Those close to both Young and Edwards describe the staffer’s passion in intensely emotional terms. Starting soon after Edwards was elected to the Senate in 1998, staffers began describing Young as intensely “jealous” of others who were close to the senator.
“He believed that Edwards was the next Kennedy,” said a person who was close to Young. “It’s not enough to say that he idolized the guy — there’s something deeper and weirder than that.”

...

Elizabeth Edwards, meanwhile, had been leaving messages on YoungÂ’s and YoungÂ’s wifeÂ’s voice mail, two sources say Young told them, demanding that he reassert his paternity to clear the cloud over her husband. The Youngs returned to Chapel Hill, and they heard that Elizabeth Edwards had been spreading the rumor that, among other things, Young had stolen her late son WadeÂ’s baseball card collection, which he denied. The (New York) Daily News reported that she had been attacking YoungÂ’s character in pseudonymous blog comments.

...

Young’s friends say he decided to write a book only after he decided that the Edwards would never set the record straight and after he read Elizabeth Edwards’s description of him as a “pathetic,” grasping male mirror image of Hunter.

“They look at our lives, which from the outside, in particular, are pictures of joy and plenty, and they want it for themselves,” she wrote of Hunter and Young in “Resilience.”

...

And Young, with all the fury of a spurned lover, may be holding out yet another threat to his old idol, if it comes to that: an explicit videotape, two people who have seen it said, of Edwards and Hunter together.

“It’s his hole card,” said the source.

I don't buy the sex-tape crap, but assuming it's legit: Enjoy thinking about how Andrew Young came to have it. As in -- cameraman? John Edwards wouldn't be content with the crap angle provided by a stationary camera, after all.

Stuff I cut out: Elizabeth Edwards suspected, rightly, that Young had helped facilitate her husband's affair, and thus the constant disparagements. But at the same time she's lobbying this guy to keep claiming, absurdly, to be the father of the kid. While she slams him publicly. Not smart, Elizabeth.

Also cut out: Young did everything for Edwards -- well, lots of menial type stuff -- and Edwards kept denying him anything like the serious job he wanted.

It's this kind of stuff that really, really makes me want nothing at all to do with this bizarre world of politics.

Thanks to Larry.

Oh, By The Way, Allah? This is a Beta Male.

Posted by: Ace at 03:50 PM | Comments (12)
Post contains 636 words, total size 4 kb.

Couldn't get Renault-Nissan on board.

Deal makes zero sense to me, why would Nissan dilute in the U.S.?

General Motors said today it would shut down Saturn after respected Detroit businessman Roger Penske shocked GM and 350 Saturn dealers by saying that his plans to buy the storied brand had fallen apart.

The announcement came a day before GM and its dealers expected the deal to be finalized. The failure could cost as many as 13,000 jobs at dealerships nationwide and GM.

The market for small fuel-efficient cars is only so large.

Until Obama gets done with it I mean.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 03:01 PM | Comments (11)
Post contains 114 words, total size 1 kb.

Easily funnier than the original, which begs the question, What good are you then?*

Via Allah, with fresh news on the Adam McKay Challenge.

* What is this from? I have a recollection of a snotty British-accented dude calling this out as a taunt to the hero, after the hero, I think, has either said he can't or won't fight (or, um, use his powers -- that kind of a movie I think).

I see the snotty British accented dude on the back of motorcycle or truck as he says the exit line.

Anyone?

Oh, Nevermind: Found it, Dorian Gray to Dr. Jekyll in the lame League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. In the back of Nemo's open-top sedan as he says it.

Posted by: Ace at 02:14 PM | Comments (9)
Post contains 135 words, total size 1 kb.

Not really surprising, really. It's never been doubted that Palin had a lot of supporters, most of whom were passionate supporters. (Unlike, say, Tom Ridge, who may have supporters, but they tend to be pretty meh on him.)

So this isn't really vindication or the like, but it's nice that the usual idiots must be annoyed. Even though they should have seen this coming, they hate her so much it scrambles their brains.

"Unprecedented:" At the top of the charts 48 days out from actual release, apparently the only non-fiction book to accomplish such a feat.

So -- big or Harry Potter big?

Number One at Amazon, Too: To save space, I was going to claim she was number one at Amazon, even though she wasn't when I posted, because I knew it was a matter of time.

Well, that time is upon us.

Posted by: Ace at 01:57 PM | Comments (42)
Post contains 176 words, total size 1 kb.

So I'm reading all the posts about Roman "If there is grass on the field, play ball" Polanski's legal travails today, and I'm struck by two thoughts. Which is one more than normal for me, and two more than Honest Cloud and Palin Steele normally have. Put together.

My two thoughts are:

1) How long until Polanski plays the Manson card and blames his screwy pre-occupation with 13 year girls on the murder of his pregnant wife, Sharon Tate, and their unborn child? You know that Oprah would totally run with this, and I bet some Hollywood jurors (and maybe even noted Washington Post writers like Anne Applebaum) would buy it.

2) What would Kanye West think about this situation? Honestly, isn't this something you always wonder about? If not it's obvious that you, like George Bush, hate black people.

Well, I don't know the answer to the first question. But I have a pretty good idea about what Kanye would say if anyone bothered to ask him. Kanye's possible answer after the jump. more...

Posted by: Jack M. at 12:52 PM | Comments (9)
Post contains 296 words, total size 2 kb.