December 15, 2009
— Ace I think I see
Indeed I see
the
Neural
Singularity
Stewed in juices
some of which
were my own
A unified blog-driven
voice has
all but grown.
The science is settled;
so let me be clear
hockey-stick
thoughts
are
readily
homogenized here.
The benefits
accrue
to me
and
to me;
I can blog
without blogging,
Posts
spring forth
effortlessly!
I cant do it alone
although that's
how it
seems.
I owe
many thanks to
the
neural
singularity.
I wonder if sometimes
Idle thoughts do in
creep.
"If no one could tell I wasn't
writing,
are my 'honest'
thoughts all that unique?"
It would appear that
they
would not be
to me.
But I've lived
a long time
in
the
neural
singularity.
Fear not
cherished readers
who've
covered my fees.
Bandwidth costs
are now a mere
fraction
of what they used to be.
So I won't need $100 grand
to spread
groupthink
all over your
PC.
All my thoughts
are your thoughts
and now
they come
free!
With membership in
the
neural
singularity.
I wonder if Suzanne Sena
knows about this.
She hasn't joined up,
so her thoughts are a-miss.
In fact,
the only thing female
I'm able to
see
Is Sarah Palin's
uterus
screaming
truth not
to power
but
to
me.
So learn this lesson
and know
you all this.
There isn't much special
about my
Daily Dish.
Any bozo could write
it,
in fact
it's done by three!
Connected together
in
the
neural
singularity.
Yes, I think I see
Indeed I see
the
Neural
Singularity
*I better damn well get an instalanche for this epic poem! I didn't spend the last 10 minutes hastily assembling a piece about "singularities" for nothing you know.
Posted by: Ace at
01:37 PM
| Comments (215)
Post contains 304 words, total size 2 kb.
Posted by: Principal Jazz at December 15, 2009 01:42 PM (hnq5i)
Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner At Large at December 15, 2009 01:43 PM (erIg9)
Posted by: Vet Missing Parts at December 15, 2009 01:44 PM (MCHyX)
Posted by: Steamboat McGoo at December 15, 2009 01:45 PM (/cH23)
Posted by: chilleur at December 15, 2009 01:45 PM (eys0j)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 01:45 PM (ZJ6KO)
Unclefacts, you must open your mind's eye in order to see through the words and gaze upon the freshly-dorked squeakhole.
Summon, Unclefacts! Summon from within!
Posted by: reason at December 15, 2009 01:46 PM (V40IZ)
Posted by: Jack M. at December 15, 2009 01:46 PM (Ncr1R)
Posted by: IllTemperedAce at December 15, 2009 01:46 PM (l1Wlr)
Al Gore should be aware of this. Now,, where did I put that dime bag?
OsamaHusseinIslamObama 2012'
(the terrorist-Uighur-ACORN-media choice)
-It's never too early to campaign-
Posted by: Barry Soetoro (D-King OF The World!!) at December 15, 2009 01:47 PM (e9CTJ)
Summon, Unclefacts! Summon from within!
Posted by: reason at December 15, 2009 05:46 PM (V40IZ)
I don't want to get any on me, Andi's kind of stupidity doesn't wash out.
Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner At Large at December 15, 2009 01:47 PM (erIg9)
Posted by: mrp at December 15, 2009 01:48 PM (HjPtV)
An Ace! An Ace! My kingdom for an Ace!
Posted by: dick the third at December 15, 2009 01:48 PM (2qU2d)
Posted by: Old Sailor at December 15, 2009 01:50 PM (/Ft4q)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 01:50 PM (ZJ6KO)
Posted by: Ace's Dying Liver at December 15, 2009 01:50 PM (F09Uo)
Posted by: notrop-ace at December 15, 2009 01:51 PM (NLjN3)
Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner At Large at December 15, 2009 01:52 PM (erIg9)
Needs more apes and figs.
Iced tea up the nose with Splenda and a little lemon in very refreshing and only stings a little.
Of course, the clean up is not much fun.
Posted by: Circa (Also, Ace) at December 15, 2009 01:52 PM (B+qrE)
It's got a good beat and you can dance to it!
OsamaHusseinIslamObama 2012'
(the terrorist-Uighur-ACORN-media choice)
-It's never too early to campaign-
Posted by: Dick Clarke at December 15, 2009 01:52 PM (e9CTJ)
Posted by: Ace's Colon at December 15, 2009 01:52 PM (F09Uo)
Posted by: ace at December 15, 2009 01:53 PM (IhQuA)
Posted by: reason at December 15, 2009 01:53 PM (V40IZ)
Posted by: Jack M. at December 15, 2009 01:53 PM (Ncr1R)
Posted by: ace's saturday night reguritation at December 15, 2009 01:54 PM (PD1tk)
Posted by: Unclefacts, Ace Summoner At Large at December 15, 2009 01:56 PM (erIg9)
Of course, the clean up is not much fun."
We aim to please, and to also clear out your sinus cavity!
Posted by: Nitti-Pot Ace at December 15, 2009 01:57 PM (92zkk)
Posted by: AceHole at December 15, 2009 01:57 PM (MMC8r)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 01:58 PM (ZJ6KO)
Posted by: The Drunken Ace at December 15, 2009 01:58 PM (iaWNX)
R R R R R R R R R R R R
R R R R R R R R R R R R
R R N N N N N N N N N
N N N N N N N ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Posted by: Hanover Fiste at December 15, 2009 01:59 PM (t3GoW)
Posted by: siftace at December 15, 2009 02:00 PM (gyoAZ)
Posted by: The Beatniks in the corner at December 15, 2009 02:00 PM (MMC8r)
My wife uses one of those nasal things. Not the neti-pot, but the squeeze-bottle one.
I have been tempted to try it, just so I can say that I have. But every time I contemplate what goes on exactly, the fear of somehow screwing it up and drowning myself with the damned thing overshadows any curiosity I may have previously held. There are certain places that hot saline should not go. And a raging torrent of it, up one nostril and (allegedly) out the other is high on that list.
Posted by: reason at December 15, 2009 02:03 PM (V40IZ)
Posted by: Sexy Poems Ace at December 15, 2009 02:03 PM (92zkk)
Posted by: Ace at December 15, 2009 02:04 PM (mGSN1)
Ace my man. I love your angle of thought and how 'your' new science destroys the old science. And how this creates conduits of anti Bt plasmama with a sprinkle of Dark Matter spasticplasma energy flowing to it's objectives.
~~~~~~~
Posted by: quite googleable at December 15, 2009 02:05 PM (EiH7n)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 02:05 PM (ZJ6KO)
Posted by: Charles DeMar at December 15, 2009 02:07 PM (t3GoW)
Posted by: Ace at December 15, 2009 02:08 PM (mGSN1)
Todd's doing just fine in his job of the whole uterus and genitals/screamin' department, IYKWIMAIKTYD. (or maybe not)
Posted by: Sarah's Screamin' Uterus at December 15, 2009 02:09 PM (92zkk)
Posted by: rightzilla at December 15, 2009 02:09 PM (rVJH4)
I think that I shall never see
A blog as lovely as thee
A blog whose ribald humor shows
There is no boundary it knows
A blog that looks at news all day
And brings teh funny in every way
A blog from which hobos flee
Because we know their flesh is tasty
Poems are made by fools like me
But only Ace can make a blog like thee.
Posted by: ace kilmer at December 15, 2009 02:09 PM (F+U5/)
To fully appreciate the wonder that is this poem you must don an entirely black outfit and a beret, head down a decrepit staircase to a smoke filled brick lined room crowded with daddy-o's, pour some absinthe over a sugar cube, sit back and blow smoke rings while you tap out the beat with your fingers on the table.
Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at December 15, 2009 02:11 PM (RZ8pf)
Posted by: ace's saturday night reguritation at December 15, 2009 02:11 PM (PD1tk)
Posted by: stuiec at December 15, 2009 02:13 PM (7AOgy)
Ace of Spades is the blog of the day
Where morons all come out to play
Where liberals are roasted and Ace gets quite toasted
And everyone gets in the frey!
Posted by: rightzilla at December 15, 2009 02:14 PM (rVJH4)
I loved you as Doc Holliday. Batman? Not so much.
Posted by: ace's testosterone level at December 15, 2009 02:14 PM (h/zKr)
Posted by: Crissy Matthews (hearts Obama!) at December 15, 2009 02:14 PM (hIOnV)
Posted by: Precedent Hussein at December 15, 2009 02:14 PM (A46hP)
Posted by: Roberts giving Oral in Hell at December 15, 2009 02:16 PM (04p0/)
Posted by: Roberts giving Oral in Hell at December 15, 2009 06:16 PM (04p0/)
The barbs, bitch. Work the barbs.
Posted by: Satan at December 15, 2009 02:17 PM (h/zKr)
Posted by: Ace Shatner at December 15, 2009 02:18 PM (OkT2m)
Posted by: rightzilla at December 15, 2009 02:18 PM (rVJH4)
Shouldn't all of ze first letters in each line spell, "fuck you, andi, no the real one and not the nobloggers cobloggers"? Zis is inadequate.
Posted by: governor arnold acezenegger at December 15, 2009 02:19 PM (2qU2d)
Posted by: The Secret World of Occidental College Grade Inflation at December 15, 2009 02:19 PM (h/zKr)
dangerously close
to copying my
style
please cease and desist
or i will be
forced
to eat your
bbrraaaaiiiinnnnsss
Posted by: zombie ee cummings at December 15, 2009 02:20 PM (kmmbv)
Posted by: Ace, the artist formally known as prince at December 15, 2009 02:20 PM (DIYmd)
Suzanne Sena should have been the only clue you needed!
It's been so long since you wrote poetry 'round here that I didn't figure it out until you dropped that giant hint.
Posted by: Mama AceJ at December 15, 2009 02:20 PM (Be4xl)
Andi's brain is more your style. All lower case.
Posted by: ace, master of the deck at December 15, 2009 02:21 PM (h/zKr)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 02:23 PM (ZJ6KO)
Posted by: Jack M. at December 15, 2009 02:23 PM (Ncr1R)
Posted by: alexthechick at December 15, 2009 02:24 PM (nwTNa)
There once was a girl from Nantucket
Who carried things 'round in a bucket
Though moving some clay
A lot did it weigh
So she thought "maybe I'd better just truck it".
Posted by: Anachronda at December 15, 2009 02:28 PM (1OYcp)
Posted by: garrett at December 15, 2009 02:28 PM (h9hzM)
Posted by: julia at December 15, 2009 02:29 PM (UW1ff)
Posted by: Explodey (rdb) at December 15, 2009 02:30 PM (Zqlid)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 02:30 PM (ZJ6KO)
Posted by: new comment thingy at December 15, 2009 02:32 PM (DIYmd)
Posted by: zombie ee cummings at December 15, 2009 06:20 PM (kmmbv)
Interesting... Andi Sullivan's co-bloggers have hit on the best way to fend off zombie attack: marinate your brains in Andi's cerebral juices, and no zombie will ever want to eat them.
Posted by: stuiec at December 15, 2009 02:32 PM (7AOgy)
madness, drinking Valu-Rite naked,
dragging themselves through the streets at dawn
looking for an easy hobo,
ginger-headed anti-hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly
connection to other sad morons in the machinery of night,
who alone and desperate and hollow-eyed and high sit
up drinking in the supernatural darkness of
the overnight thread, floating across the blogosphere
contemplating sockpuppets,
who bared their boobs to morons with ASCII art and
saw Mohammedan terr'ists a'sploded by Hellfire missles
(but mostly Hellfire missiles),
who pass through universities with radiant cool eyes
hallucinating cheerleaders and red-light districts
among the scholars of pr0n,
who were expelled from that other blog for reason,
publishing obscene odes for appearance of the flaming skull,
Posted by: Ace Ginsburg at December 15, 2009 02:32 PM (OkT2m)
A mention of Neptune's bones dissolving would made this a masterpiece.
As it stands, I am still the greatest man that has ever lived.
Posted by: Al Gore's imagination at December 15, 2009 02:34 PM (KVSUW)
Some question, and ask why,
Uterus and Va Jay Jay
I've never seen
Get me more KY
Some say pooper, no way
My filthy sphincter, never clean.
Posted by: ace1200 at December 15, 2009 02:34 PM (dUR2C)
Posted by: Ace at December 15, 2009 02:35 PM (mGSN1)
Posted by: aceprof at December 15, 2009 02:35 PM (I3Udb)
*I better damn well get an instalanche for this epic poem! I didn't spend the last 10 minutes hastily assembling a piece about "singularities" for nothing you know.
That must be some boring trip, you're probably on a plane sitting near the bulkhead where families with small children are placed, and you're distracting yourself with poetry.
Posted by: Def-ace-d at December 15, 2009 02:37 PM (BoFBr)
Posted by: kACEper hACer at December 15, 2009 02:37 PM (ZiQz8)
Posted by: The Aces at December 15, 2009 02:37 PM (ZiQz8)
My heart warms just to think of it. heh heh heh
Posted by: by ace, it's definitely me this time at December 15, 2009 02:38 PM (io7tO)
mmm..
mmmmm
mmmmmmmm!
gives the soetoro teachers union a run for their money...
btw o4po/... wtf - sniffin (andies)crack is bad.... hmkay
Posted by: JAM2 at December 15, 2009 02:39 PM (8iTbj)
I lick my facial hair
stained by strangers
still wearing their underwear
bathroom stall
much to small
for a proper rump ramger
Posted by: andi1200ace at December 15, 2009 02:40 PM (dUR2C)
Posted by: crystal at December 15, 2009 02:40 PM (KVSUW)
Posted by: Explodey (rdb) at December 15, 2009 02:40 PM (Zqlid)
Over and over
I've ghosted this blog
Over and over
I've worked like a dog
Over and over
Been used like a tool
But over and over
I'm glad I'm his fool
'Cause he's got
*boom*
Singularity
Rant - Singularity
Pant - Singularity
Toke - Singularity
Smoke - Singularity
Spurt - Singularity
And 'cause he's got a juicy brain
Posted by: Lloyd Price at December 15, 2009 02:44 PM (7AOgy)
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the disco light is shining bright;Adam Lambert is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,And somewhere men are reaching, and somewhere SMTP's shout;But there is no joy in Provencetown— mighty andi has sold out.
Posted by: andi sullivan, space of aids at December 15, 2009 02:45 PM (sYxEE)
Posted by: andi after a watching a circle of friends at December 15, 2009 02:45 PM (rVJH4)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 06:30 PM (ZJ6KO)
Did you look in her bucket? 'Nuff said.
Posted by: Lloyd Price at December 15, 2009 02:46 PM (7AOgy)
Like-like-like-like-like-like-like you're my idea of a dream come true - takin' shit from a dildo with ears?
You know when I was like five I said, "Dad, Dad! Can I get a job where random fuckin' shitheads blow me crap all day?" I'm gonna break you in fuckin' half and use your head has a ballpoint!
Now that's epic poetry.
Posted by: Carl Hefler at December 15, 2009 02:47 PM (iYbLN)
I've labored hard and long,
For honor and for riches,
But on my blog too long you've tread,
You dumbass sons of bitches
Posted by: Black Ace the Po8 at December 15, 2009 02:47 PM (sYxEE)
writing on felopians is hard work
sniffing my crotch stenched hands
still wafting from the last circle jerk
covered in the goo, of another mans glands.
Posted by: andi1200ace at December 15, 2009 02:48 PM (dUR2C)
Posted by: rightzilla at December 15, 2009 02:48 PM (rVJH4)
Posted by: Andi and Julia at December 15, 2009 02:49 PM (rVJH4)
The lunatic is in my head
You raise the blade
You make the change
You rearrange me 'till I'm sane
Posted by: The Dark Side of the Ace at December 15, 2009 02:50 PM (pUO5u)
Posted by: verdrangung at December 15, 2009 02:51 PM (kYsvW)
He did not know I saw;
He bit an angle-worm in halves
And ate the fellow, raw.
And then he drank a dew
From a convenient ass,
And then hopped sidewise to the wall
To let a beetle pass.
Posted by: Emily "Ace" Dickinson at December 15, 2009 02:54 PM (KVSUW)
Posted by: aced at December 15, 2009 02:55 PM (GmRCE)
Posted by: Elvis "Ace" Presley at December 15, 2009 02:56 PM (KVSUW)
Posted by: Dr. Albert Einstein Gore at December 15, 2009 02:57 PM (UOM48)
How many loads must a man wolf down
Before you call him a man?
How many songs must a white guy play
Before he jams with the band?
Yes, 'n' how many times must the lizards try
Before they're forever banned?
The answer, my friend, is bloggin' in the wind,
The answer is bloggin' in the wind.
Yes, 'n' How many years can a blogger exist
Before he retires to the sea?
Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
When lurkers read me for free?
Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his back,
and pretend that he just doesn't care?
The answer, my friend, is bloggin' in the wind,
The answer is bloggin' in the wind.
Yes, 'n' how many links must a man look up
Before he can photo the sky ?
Yes, 'n' how many updings must one man have
Before he can hear people cry?
Yes, 'n' how many bannings will it take till he knows
That too many people have left?
The answer, my friend, is bloggin' in the wind,
The answer is bloggin' in the wind.
Posted by: Ace Dylan at December 15, 2009 03:02 PM (sYxEE)
Posted by: Shannon at December 15, 2009 03:04 PM (niZOC)
over many eggs and sperm of Palin and her daughter/whore.
As I nodded - nearly napping - suddenly there came a slapping
as if someone harshly whapping, whapping at my big head sore.
'Tis some commenter, I muttered, whapping at my big head sore.
Only this, and nothing more.
Posted by: Edgar Ace Poe at December 15, 2009 03:05 PM (92zkk)
Posted by: sybilll at December 15, 2009 03:06 PM (eROZ5)
Sacrilege!
Have ye not read St. Andrew's encyclical on the Sacrament of the Uterus? Do you not know the 95 Feces of Charles Luther Johnson - the very feces he stuck on the homepage of his own Holy Blog?
Repent, ye sinners!
Posted by: A Puritan of the Left-Center-Left at December 15, 2009 03:06 PM (7AOgy)
Poetry like that really makes me glad I munch carpet.
Posted by: Wanda Sykes at December 15, 2009 03:08 PM (KVSUW)
Oh, and I thought it was genius how you were able to work in a line about Sarah Palin's uterus. That was truly inspired.
You rang??
Posted by: Sarah Palin's uterus at December 15, 2009 03:09 PM (CH1cF)
Oh lord it's hard to be humble,
When you're perfect in every way,
I can't wait to look in the mirror,
I get better looking each day
To know me is to love me
I must be one helluva man
Oh lord it's hard to be humble,
But I'm doing the best that I can
Posted by: B+arack Ob+ama at December 15, 2009 03:09 PM (sYxEE)
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made it possible for my dumb-ass co-blogger to spill the beans.
Posted by: Ace Frost at December 15, 2009 03:10 PM (7AOgy)
Posted by: Blazer at December 15, 2009 06:52 PM (+FzLa)
Or some estrogen. Hot flashes are a bitch.
Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at December 15, 2009 03:21 PM (h/zKr)
Dark and lonely on a summer's night.
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Watchdog barking. Do he bite?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Slip in his window. Break his neck.
Then his house I start to wreck.
Got no reason. What the heck?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
C-I-L my land lord!
Posted by: ace green at December 15, 2009 03:29 PM (+FzLa)
Posted by: Optimus Ace at December 15, 2009 03:32 PM (KVSUW)
Tried to translate some Blake into Moron-ese and discovered, ummm..it's really hard.
Failure -
I'm sure someone else is up to the challenge.
Posted by: Poetic Injustice at December 15, 2009 03:32 PM (T0ga9)
Posted by: Jeaneane Garafolo at December 15, 2009 03:34 PM (KVSUW)
Posted by: Ace D'oh at December 15, 2009 03:34 PM (UOM48)
Posted by: Ace Star Screen at December 15, 2009 03:35 PM (KVSUW)
on little cat feet.
It sits waiting
for the morons and trolls
on silent haunches
and then bans all.
Posted by: Ace Sandburg at December 15, 2009 03:39 PM (sey23)
All you can do is ban who you must
You ban who you must ban
And you do it well
I ban them for Gabe, honey baby can't you tell?
Posted by: Ace Dylan at December 15, 2009 03:43 PM (sey23)
Posted by: FURPC at December 15, 2009 03:46 PM (ZJ6KO)
Me eight. I have a serious identity crisis.
Posted by: Whoopi Goldberg at December 15, 2009 03:47 PM (KVSUW)
Posted by: Leftist woman at December 15, 2009 03:48 PM (KVSUW)
Go not gently in that squeekhole.
Fight to stuff it all in
In each hand, jerking a pole
money shot of old mens Gin
Posted by: andi1200ace at December 15, 2009 03:54 PM (dUR2C)
MamaDude put my pecker in the tranny
I'm too fat to see it anymore,
Slap me silly and call me manny
Fuckin blogger, more like an eyore
Posted by: Dylanace1200 at December 15, 2009 03:58 PM (dUR2C)
Once I wrote shit like the Iliad
Now stoned with a head full of jizz
Admitting I'm an asshole is sad
But there is a Uterus, I must quiz.
Posted by: HomerACE1200 at December 15, 2009 04:05 PM (dUR2C)
Who blogged about hobos and pork.
His commenters cried
With a gleam in their eyes
"There are squeakholes that need to be dorked!"
Posted by: joncelli at December 15, 2009 04:11 PM (Ko4Av)
upon
a furry
ewok
glazed with val-
u-rite
beside the dead
hobos.
Posted by: William Ace Williams at December 15, 2009 07:34 PM (sey23)
WINNAR
Posted by: aced it at December 15, 2009 04:31 PM (b0sdZ)
Posted by: it's an ace thang at December 15, 2009 04:32 PM (b0sdZ)
Posted by: Ace of Cakes at December 15, 2009 04:37 PM (KVSUW)
Snow is falling
Plate of cookies
Awaiting sound of reindeer hoofies..
sadly disappointed.
Posted by: MPFS, Holiday Fish Stick at December 15, 2009 05:00 PM (PBGAP)
Posted by: jumpininhere at December 15, 2009 05:24 PM (DkPYM)
@ Ace
Such euclid-ity drives from me my muse to thuse thusly:
See me!
Hear me!
Touch me!
Inappropriately!
Thank you.
Posted by: memomachine at December 15, 2009 05:30 PM (/+tPT)
Blinking dimly
Golems
In the shadow
Typing
Creepy man
Creepy ways
Golems typing
Lifeless digits
Grind Sully's stone
Make Sully's bread
Lifeless
Life
Posted by: Beto at December 15, 2009 05:56 PM (+CLh/)
Posted by: macbrooks at December 15, 2009 06:19 PM (aKb5r)
Posted by: Corona at December 16, 2009 05:08 AM (woZIc)
Blogga, just banned a man
Put a hammer 'gainst his head
Clicked my mouse, his IP's dead
Blogga, the thread had just begun,
But now I've gone and thrown it all away!
Blogga, oooh!
Didn't mean to make you cry
If I don't post again this time tomorrow
Still log on, still log on as if nothing really matters...
Too late, my instalanche has come
Sends packets down my spine
Modem's aching all the time
Goodbye, co-bloggers
I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
BLOGGA, OO-OO-OOH! (Anyway, this thread blows)
I don't want to die
Sometimes wish I'd never been trolled at all...
Posted by: hobohemian rhapsody? at December 16, 2009 08:00 AM (XiVKO)
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Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner At Large at December 15, 2009 01:39 PM (erIg9)