November 20, 2009
— Gabriel Malor Good news! CERN is powering up the new superconducting supercollider. Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light. We may all cease to exist in about 15 minutes!
Very much related to my earlier posts about the Hadley CRU meltdown: Wall Street Journal reports: "More Scientists Treat Experiments as a Team Sport."
Once a mostly solitary endeavor, science in the 21st century has become a team sport. Research collaborations are larger, more common, more widely cited and more influential than ever, management studies show. Measured by the number of authors on a published paper, research teams have grown steadily in size and number every year since World War II.To gauge the rise of team science, management experts at Northwestern University recently analyzed 2.1 million U.S. patents filed since 1975 and all of the 19.9 million research papers archived in the Institute for Scientific Information database. "We looked at the recorded universe of all published papers across all fields, and we found that all fields were moving heavily toward teamwork," says Northwestern business sociologist Brian Uzzi.
As research projects grow more complicated, management becomes a variable in every experiment. "You can't do it alone," says research management analyst Maria Binz-Scharf at City College of New York. "The question is how you put it all together."
Uh huh. *cough*consensus*cough*
Aaaaah, the black holes are sending me back in time...to when I bitchslapped Rick Moran for being a neo-luddite about the LHC.
Posted by: Gabriel Malor at
11:20 AM
| Comments (166)
Post contains 265 words, total size 2 kb.
Posted by: joncelli at November 20, 2009 11:22 AM (RD7QR)
*insert inappropriate 'hadron' joke here*
What is it with you Luddites who think this is a bad thing? Shit we could have discovered higgs' boson already if funding to the SSSC hadn't been cut way back when.
Posted by: Dang Straights at November 20, 2009 11:26 AM (Haq+B)
Posted by: Bosk at November 20, 2009 11:26 AM (pUO5u)
Posted by: HeftyJo at November 20, 2009 11:26 AM (+BqEV)
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:26 AM (9hSKh)
Bad news, Senate is powering up the new supersucking supersocialism. Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every dollar of your net worth exploding at the speed of light. We may all be slaves of the state in about 15 months!
Posted by: His boy Sherman at November 20, 2009 11:27 AM (Oxen1)
Posted by: mr.frakypants at November 20, 2009 11:27 AM (PonvG)
Posted by: Alex's Cabin at November 20, 2009 11:27 AM (i3IvH)
2 The black holes that the LHC could make are tiny and wouldn't do much damage to the Earth. Although Geneva could be toast.
Perhaps Stephen Hawking is wrong.
*insert scary music here*.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:27 AM (9hSKh)
The black holes that the LHC could make are tiny and wouldn't do much damage to the Earth. Although Geneva could be toast.
Posted by: joncelli at November 20, 2009 03:22 PM (RD7QR)
But only if Hawking is right. we'll soon see in about ten minutes. The other thing to worry about is an Ice 9 event concerning quarks.
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 11:28 AM (+FzLa)
hmm, where the heck is the lambs blood to throw on our doors?
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:28 AM (wgSRa)
I'm sorry. I can't be fearful of something that shit the bed because of a few baguette crumbs.
Posted by: Che Pizza at November 20, 2009 11:29 AM (SPSOE)
#10
So life is really like the Matrix then? I don't want Keanu Reeves to be a savior though, damn it!
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:30 AM (9hSKh)
If a black hole DOES pop into existence, we can just send Keefums Oberdouche. If he can defeat death, he can defeat some candy-ass singularity.
Posted by: Dang Straights at November 20, 2009 11:30 AM (Haq+B)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:31 AM (wgSRa)
Get out of my head, Kratos. It's cramped enough already.
Posted by: Che Pizza at November 20, 2009 11:31 AM (SPSOE)
Dude, moron blog. Let's not get started on the cohomology of the universe.
Posted by: Methos at November 20, 2009 11:31 AM (CoDwG)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:31 AM (wgSRa)
Posted by: Ron Jeremy at November 20, 2009 11:32 AM (v+QvA)
#13 Ice 9 event concerning quarks.
What the hell is that, Blazer? I'm only trained in the biological sciences, so that sentence reads to me like Vanilla Ice made a band and "quark" is some sort of pseudo street-slang that Ice made up on the spot.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:32 AM (9hSKh)
hmm, where the heck is the lambs blood to throw on our doors?
In a pinch, hobos are an acceptable substitute.
Posted by: 141 Driver at November 20, 2009 11:32 AM (JFNQ7)
Even I, a half-Swiss, could hear the death scream of a million Swiss minds crying out over the distance between us.
Posted by: Gran at November 20, 2009 11:32 AM (xmjMj)
Trailor trash, i'm tapping fingernails, seems to move slow right now,
omg, i see my life flashing before my eyes!
oh heck that was just the tv.
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:32 AM (wgSRa)
And from the Fifth century, no less.
Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at November 20, 2009 11:33 AM (5aa4z)
Posted by: conscious, but incoherent at November 20, 2009 11:34 AM (kn+jW)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:34 AM (wgSRa)
Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (5aa4z)
Posted by: joncelli at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (RD7QR)
95% of the morons are frantically searching for porn.
Posted by: Methos at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (CoDwG)
Posted by: They guy who said don't tase me bro at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (SPSOE)
Posted by: conscious, but incoherent at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (kn+jW)
What the hell is that, Blazer? I'm only trained in the biological sciences, so that sentence reads to me like Vanilla Ice made a band and "quark" is some sort of pseudo street-slang that Ice made up on the spot.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 03:32 PM (9hSKh)
If one negative charged quark can pop into existence from LHC, theoretically it can then convert all positive charged quarks over to negative resulting in a very bad chain reaction.
Some say it could destroy the whole solar system, others the entire galaxy.
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (+FzLa)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:35 AM (wgSRa)
Don't you mean the Hadley Particle Colluder, Gabe?
Posted by: andycanuck at November 20, 2009 11:36 AM (2qU2d)
Countdown would still seem to last forever, by comparison.
Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at November 20, 2009 11:36 AM (5aa4z)
Posted by: They guy who said don't tase me bro at November 20, 2009 11:36 AM (SPSOE)
Gabe:
It's been kept secret, but this thing fired up in Nov 2008. We crossed the event horizon and we are now in the parallel but antimatter universe. That's the only explanation for events in the last twelve months.
Posted by: Huckleberry at November 20, 2009 11:37 AM (s2bW4)
32 Only Skynet can save us now.
It's a trick! Remember from T3 that Skynet released the virus to trick the military into activating Skynet and...
Yeah, the movie didn't make much sense and it looked like a failed script for T2.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:37 AM (9hSKh)
Posted by: Methos at November 20, 2009 11:37 AM (CoDwG)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:37 AM (wgSRa)
Posted by: Aaron at November 20, 2009 11:38 AM (pVvKc)
So THAT's why I have a goatee now!
Posted by: Che Pizza's Evil Twin at November 20, 2009 11:38 AM (SPSOE)
Posted by: Che Pizza at November 20, 2009 11:39 AM (SPSOE)
Yeah. Things might ACTUALLY start warming up now.
Posted by: Che Pizza at November 20, 2009 11:40 AM (SPSOE)
Choooooocolate!!!!
Posted by: 1,000,000 dying Swiss at November 20, 2009 11:40 AM (2qU2d)
Posted by: toby928 at November 20, 2009 11:40 AM (PD1tk)
#44 If one negative charged quark can pop into existence from LHC, theoretically it can then convert all positive charged quarks over to negative resulting in a very bad chain reaction.
Basically like prion disease for sub-atomic molecules. Got it now, thanks!
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:41 AM (9hSKh)
Skynet released the virus that became Skynet. Didn't you listen to the monologue at the end?
Hey are we still here?
Posted by: Methos at November 20, 2009 11:41 AM (CoDwG)
Posted by: toby928 at November 20, 2009 03:40 PM (PD1tk)
Hey. You believed me..
Posted by: Violet at November 20, 2009 11:41 AM (5aa4z)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:42 AM (wgSRa)
Posted by: Cicero at November 20, 2009 11:43 AM (QKKT0)
ok, fun question (maybe)
if this was your last day on earth, what would you be doing?
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 03:41 PM (wgSRa)
Jerking off or running around slapping old ladies
Posted by: Gordon Freeman at November 20, 2009 11:43 AM (cBeTr)
So THAT's why I have a goatee now!
Into the agony booth, Mr Che Pizza's Evil Twin. You were operating the controls when the Valu-Rite Particle Collider malfunctioned and caused a time rift.
Posted by: Ace's personal security team at November 20, 2009 11:43 AM (2qU2d)
Posted by: United Nations Population Fund at November 20, 2009 11:43 AM (pLTLS)
Posted by: Aaron at November 20, 2009 11:44 AM (pVvKc)
Samsung's coming out with a Pocket Hadron Collider for mobile use in about six months. You can smash protons with it
will it work on leftys?
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:44 AM (wgSRa)
And take away Mr Malor's agonizer. He's having too much fun with it.
Posted by: Ace's personal security team at November 20, 2009 11:44 AM (2qU2d)
I don't remember him having a goatee this morning...
Posted by: Gran at November 20, 2009 11:44 AM (xmjMj)
>>if this was your last day on earth, what would you be doing?
Working. That's what I do all the time anyway. Mostly its driving around in the ghetto knocking on doors and computer records crap.
Posted by: Triumph at November 20, 2009 11:45 AM (lDdA/)
Hey Malor, from now on please let us know a day or two ahead of time when a potential planet destroying event is gonna take place. That way I can get extremely drunk and max out my credit cards.
Sober and in your boxers is no way to go out.
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 11:45 AM (+FzLa)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at November 20, 2009 11:45 AM (DIYmd)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:45 AM (wgSRa)
The new LHC T-shirts are already available. Michelle got hers and it says:
"I went to see them start the supercollider and all I got was a black hole!"
Posted by: conscious, but incoherent at November 20, 2009 11:45 AM (kn+jW)
ok, fun question (maybe)
if this was your last day on earth, what would you be doing?
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 03:41 PM (wgSRa)
Being slapped by jerking old ladies running around.
Posted by: Aaron at November 20, 2009 11:46 AM (pVvKc)
ok, fun question (maybe)
if this was your last day on earth, what would you be doing?
Hunting down journalists, and introducing them to my home waterboarding kit.
Posted by: Chainsaw Chimp, Dicer of Fools at November 20, 2009 11:46 AM (pLTLS)
Posted by: it'smedude at November 20, 2009 11:46 AM (1YVGN)
#63 Skynet released the virus that became Skynet. Didn't you listen to the monologue at the end?
I tried to but a) I found Nick Stahl to be inadequate for playing John Conner and b) I was busy looking for any potential Skinemax Claire Danes and Kristanna Loken clips (which I did not find, alas).
I found that "twist" to be stupid anyway since a) Skynet wasn't activated yet but was able to release a virus to take complete control and b) If this virus was Skynet then it just basically destroyed 99% of itself in the subsequent nuking of the Earth. Doesn't seem very efficient to me.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:46 AM (9hSKh)
Posted by: Peter Higgs at November 20, 2009 11:47 AM (QKKT0)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 11:47 AM (wgSRa)
41 hell, 5 minutes left. what to do, what to do.
95% of the morons are frantically searching for porn.
Now what to do with my other four minutes?
Posted by: DngrMse at November 20, 2009 11:48 AM (zGzBG)
Some options:
1) get to the mission & pray
2) get a case of Mescal & six whores
3) finish the game
I shall finish the game.
Posted by: Gran at November 20, 2009 11:48 AM (xmjMj)
Posted by: Loren Heal at November 20, 2009 11:48 AM (NNLn+)
Posted by: Peter Higgs at November 20, 2009 11:48 AM (QKKT0)
if this was your last day on earth, what would you be doing?
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 03:41 PM (wgSRa)
It would involve a fast exotic sports car, loose trashy women, automatic weapons, illicit drugs and lots of alcohol.
Or basically any movie with Jason Statham in it.
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 11:49 AM (+FzLa)
if this was your last day on earth, what would you be doing?
Finding the rarest of the rare 90's Late Night Skinemax clips. Then I'd select 5 to 10 of them, buy or steal 4-9 other computers, and play the clips over and over in unison until the world ended.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 11:49 AM (9hSKh)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 03:45 PM (wgSRa)
If you can't give me a gummy, you're not old
Posted by: Gordon Freeman at November 20, 2009 11:49 AM (cBeTr)
COLOSSUS: If Man cannot solve that problem, I can.
Posted by: Great moments in AI rule at November 20, 2009 11:49 AM (DtTM9)
Posted by: Vic at November 20, 2009 11:49 AM (CDUiN)
That's the only explanation for events in the last twelve months.
Word.
The Cincinnati Bengals are 7-2.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at November 20, 2009 11:50 AM (B+qrE)
CERN is powering up the new superconducting supercollider.
It seems like I should have been invited.
Posted by: Superman at November 20, 2009 11:50 AM (QKKT0)
Posted by: Triumph at November 20, 2009 11:51 AM (lDdA/)
Posted by: Aaron at November 20, 2009 11:51 AM (pVvKc)
Can SOMEone give me some asSISTance?
Posted by: Stephen Hawking at November 20, 2009 11:52 AM (xmjMj)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 03:50 PM (wgSRa)
Awesome! I'll need someone to help hold them down.
Posted by: Chainsaw Chimp, Dicer of Fools at November 20, 2009 11:52 AM (pLTLS)
One little drop of red substance and I'll destroy your planet. Now if I can only get the drill to work.
Posted by: polyromulan at November 20, 2009 03:40 PM (m2CN7)
*shakes head* what has become of star trek...*sigh*
Posted by: it'smedude at November 20, 2009 11:53 AM (1YVGN)
Posted by: lorien1973 at November 20, 2009 11:54 AM (IhQuA)
Posted by: Richard Feynman at November 20, 2009 11:54 AM (QKKT0)
The metal terminator released the virus when she made a cell phone call early on in the movie. It was future Skynet that created the virus. And the machines weren't all that efficient at that point, they had to strike as soon as they could to minimize our ability to deal with the threat. Remember that future Skynet already knew how long the resistance would take to get underway.
Posted by: Methos at November 20, 2009 11:55 AM (CoDwG)
Building a superconducting supercollider to destroy the world!
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at November 20, 2009 11:55 AM (DIYmd)
Posted by: fartbubble at November 20, 2009 11:57 AM (cBeTr)
#109
CGI is to good movies, as Red Matter is to planets.
Posted by: DngrMse at November 20, 2009 03:55 PM (zGzBG)
MY EYES! MY EYES! the lens flares!!!
Posted by: it'smedude at November 20, 2009 11:59 AM (1YVGN)
Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at November 20, 2009 03:58 PM (5aa4z)
you really are a bottom boy, now aren't you
Posted by: fartbubble at November 20, 2009 11:59 AM (cBeTr)
So who's the top quark around here?
Posted by: Richard Feynman at November 20, 2009 03:54 PM (QKKT0)
I believe ace is the HNIC around here. Head Neutrino In Charge.
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 12:00 PM (+FzLa)
Posted by: The Boobie Watcher (rdb) at November 20, 2009 12:00 PM (1N71u)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at November 20, 2009 12:02 PM (DIYmd)
Posted by: John Bigbooté at November 20, 2009 12:02 PM (RykTt)
Posted by: Ron Jeremy at November 20, 2009 12:05 PM (HylJ6)
Posted by: Kathy at November 20, 2009 12:06 PM (JcE0Y)
Posted by: The Boobie Watcher (rdb) at November 20, 2009 12:06 PM (1N71u)
Posted by: John Bolton at November 20, 2009 12:06 PM (5aa4z)
Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at November 20, 2009 12:06 PM (zmiSr)
Posted by: The Boobie Watcher (rdb) at November 20, 2009 12:07 PM (1N71u)
Miss 80s, but we have eachother,
in ghettos or not ,on computers maybe with porn,skinflics, with geeks (that wanna build colliderrs)and without people like me that can build a decent stew, and wine! it's not all bad
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 12:09 PM (wgSRa)
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 04:00 PM (+FzLa)
A finalist for thread winner.
The Big Bang went off all right, why not the LHC?
Does anyone know what made Hawking famous? His analysis about particles and anti-particles appearing next to an event horizon and the anti-particle getting sucked in, thereby causing the black hole to lose mass?
Here's my question: Isn't it statistically compelled that just as many particles get sucked in as anti-particles, thereby having no net effect on the mass of the black hole?
Posted by: FUBAR at November 20, 2009 12:10 PM (q4jwQ)
-Douglas Adams
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at November 20, 2009 12:11 PM (DIYmd)
Posted by: FUBAR at November 20, 2009 12:11 PM (q4jwQ)
Crap! My perpetual motion machine just stopped running. Bloody Large Hadron Collider.
Posted by: andycanuck at November 20, 2009 12:11 PM (2qU2d)
Posted by: Jesse Jackson, World Renowned Expert on Who's A Black Hole at November 20, 2009 12:12 PM (QKKT0)
I explained to the LHC that a black hole destroying everything was racist. So a black hole really was created, it just didn't destroy everything, it's keeping existence going. And it demands reparations. And affirmative action.
Posted by: Commissioner John Wiley Price, Dallas Tx at November 20, 2009 12:12 PM (xhPKT)
That shit ain't funny.
Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at November 20, 2009 12:12 PM (5aa4z)
Well, if it's running, the other side of the world from Geneva is still here. Leesville, Louisiana, checking in at 1514 hours local time.
Posted by: SGT Dan at November 20, 2009 12:14 PM (ZP+gj)
Posted by: willow at November 20, 2009 12:15 PM (wgSRa)
#114. The metal terminator released the virus when she made a cell phone call early on in the movie. It was future Skynet that created the virus. And the machines weren't all that efficient at that point, they had to strike as soon as they could to minimize our ability to deal with the threat. Remember that future Skynet already knew how long the resistance would take to get underway.
Sorry, I still find it stupid. If Skynet is now a super virus that can take over everything at whim, it still didn't need to go into that facility in CA. Hell, it would have probably been easier to hijack and take-over the Russian and Chinese nuclear missiles.
Posted by: Kratos (on the back of Gaia, scaling Mt Olympus) at November 20, 2009 12:16 PM (9hSKh)
My Oscar told me so.
Posted by: Al Gore at November 20, 2009 12:17 PM (xmjMj)
Posted by: Jesse Jackson, World Renowned Expert on Who's A Black Hole at November 20, 2009 12:17 PM (QKKT0)
The Russian computers were stolen and sold on the black market. And most of their shit corroded from the liquid fuels in the bottom of the silos to the point they would have blown up rather than launched.
Posted by: SGT Dan at November 20, 2009 12:24 PM (ZP+gj)
The explosion at the LHC last year that put it out of comission picked up a 40 ton magnet and threw it several meters.
Wrap your mind around that for a minute.
Posted by: Blazer at November 20, 2009 12:25 PM (+FzLa)
"Good news! CERN is powering up the new superconducting supercollider. Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light. We may all cease to exist in about 15 minutes!"
Eh! Less scary than ObamaCare. Actually, I have been praying (and "hoping") for an asteroid to hit dead center on DC.
Posted by: drillanwr at November 20, 2009 12:27 PM (1kwr2)
We may all cease to exist in about 15 minutes!
If so, it will all be the fault of George Bush and other right wing extremist teabaggers who selfishly oppose Obamacare for their own racist purposes.
Posted by: malclave at November 20, 2009 12:43 PM (W1Ndc)
Posted by: drillanwr at November 20, 2009 12:53 PM (1kwr2)
Not necessarily. There's definitely a *very slim* chance we'll survive.
love this plan! I'm excited to be a part of it! LET'S DO IT!
Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at November 20, 2009 01:02 PM (1hM1d)
Posted by: Christopher taylor at November 20, 2009 01:14 PM (PQY7w)
How can people from the future save us when they're all dead from the Collider?
Posted by: Aaron at November 20, 2009 02:15 PM (pVvKc)
Posted by: yobobbyb at November 20, 2009 03:15 PM (P0MTp)
Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
That would be bad. Lets not cross the beams.
Posted by: Ohio Dan at November 20, 2009 03:20 PM (RQ+qN)
Oh Shit!
Posted by: Peter Higgs at November 20, 2009 03:28 PM (P0MTp)
How can people from the future save us when they're all dead from the Collider?
Posted by: Aaron at November 20, 2009 06:15 PM (pVvKc)
What ? It could happen.
Posted by: Hollywood screenwriters guild at November 20, 2009 03:35 PM (+FzLa)
And even if Hawking was wrong and the singularity persists, it will be so small that it could easily cycle back and forth through the Earth and not impact a nucleus more than a few times at most. And on a diet of only a few atomic nuclei a day, it will take it a long time to grow big enough to be a problem. I'm not capable of doing the math, but it wouldn't surprise me if the Earth would be swallowed up by the Sun turning into a red giant long before a wayward quantum black hole could slurp up the core.
Posted by: Flubber at November 20, 2009 04:07 PM (VL5if)
With any luck this will open a way to the dimension of tall, slender, yet busty warrior-women who like middle-aged lawyers.
"Lawyer-man! I shall ravish you as my people decree!"
"YES! I mean, no - do not humiliate me with your sexual prowess!"
"Too late, you whiny, glasses-wearing fool!"
What the heck - a man can dream, correct?
Posted by: Mikey NTH at November 20, 2009 05:24 PM (TUWci)
Posted by: mbt shoes at November 20, 2009 09:06 PM (b1hdx)
Its like a work of art.
Posted by: toby928 at November 20, 2009 05:37 PM (PD1tk)
If you're really worried, you can watch what the boffins are up to here at the LHC webcam site:
http://tinyurl.com/5tyyq3
Posted by: Mike Van Pelt at November 23, 2009 12:40 AM (IxIR5)
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Posted by: Scott J. at November 20, 2009 11:21 AM (NY7mQ)