January 05, 2010
— Ace Uhhhh... "Poker Face" becomes "Whorish Face."
It might help if the women they having singing this could, what's the word?, sing.
I'm not even really a fan of Lady Gaga. (Well, I kind of dig that her primary stagecraft influence seems to be Alice Cooper, which is odd for a pop-tart.)
But... oh man.
Worth listening to, I think. It's just funny to see what stone-cold retards think is witty.
Thanks to Andy Levy's Twitter feed.
Posted by: Ace at
12:44 PM
| Comments (152)
Post contains 100 words, total size 1 kb.
inb4 "Phelps is a registered Dem" comment!
Anyway, this convinces me that Fred Phelps and his clan of mutants are, basically, trolls, running an extended parody of Christianity: a la Billionaires For Bush and (on the right) Protest Warriors.
Posted by: Zimriel at January 05, 2010 12:48 PM (9Sbz+)
Posted by: God at January 05, 2010 12:50 PM (UAnTc)
O/T: Barky's on 'splainin' the undie bomber. I've lost track of the number of times he uses "I". Just used "Let me be clear." "As I've always said."
So when's he kicking Janet N. under the bus?
Posted by: Jane D'oh! at January 05, 2010 12:50 PM (UOM48)
Posted by: toby928 at January 05, 2010 12:50 PM (PD1tk)
Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at January 05, 2010 12:51 PM (RZ8pf)
Barry is on the TV...Unprecedented...goes to the heart...will be anouncing shortly..hunt them wherever ...smarter screeening etc
That's all you need to know
Posted by: hutch1200 at January 05, 2010 12:51 PM (UeVTT)
Posted by: teej at January 05, 2010 12:51 PM (c459z)
Posted by: Satan at January 05, 2010 12:52 PM (9Sbz+)
Posted by: hutch1200 at January 05, 2010 12:52 PM (UeVTT)
Posted by: toby928 at January 05, 2010 04:50 PM (PD1tk)
AKA Superdelegate!
Posted by: hutch1200 at January 05, 2010 12:53 PM (UeVTT)
Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at January 05, 2010 04:51 PM (RZ8pf)
it's a chick, she didn't look to bad before she became Lady Gaga either.
I can't lie, this made me giggle in the it's-so-bad-it's-funny way
Posted by: fartbubble at January 05, 2010 12:53 PM (cBeTr)
Posted by: vai2112 at January 05, 2010 12:54 PM (4ucyN)
PLAY FREEBIRD!!!! -
Fine, okay, we'll do that. Just don't ask the drummer if he can play Wipe Out. It really pisses him off since he could do that in 9th grade. Especially don't ask at the end of the evening when you're drunk and he's tired and ready to load out and go home.
Posted by: teej at January 05, 2010 12:57 PM (c459z)
Wow, Obama hates America too. Does he belong to that church?
Posted by: sickinmass at January 05, 2010 12:57 PM (Dxfei)
What are they? I always got the impression that they lived off of lawsuit settlements but were little more than a few family members who go out and try to get sued. Do they actually have a constituency?
Posted by: AmishDude at January 05, 2010 12:59 PM (Vo2Ef)
If those cretins in that church are Christians, I'm a brain surgeon.
And @ 10
PGIS, you are so correct. If there are a bunch of journos running in one direction, I'll run the opposite way.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at January 05, 2010 12:59 PM (i3AsK)
Posted by: dr kill at January 05, 2010 01:00 PM (tGYpf)
Posted by: bowel movement at January 05, 2010 01:01 PM (Fd5yK)
Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at January 05, 2010 04:51 PM (RZ8pf)
My wife is addicted to those Hollywood gossip TV shows. A few days ago she told me they showed a clip of Lady GaGa dismounting from a motorcycle without benefit of underwear and she had more equipment than a lady should have IYKWIMAITTYD.
Posted by: WalrusRex at January 05, 2010 01:03 PM (xxgag)
Posted by: Dr. Spank at January 05, 2010 01:04 PM (muUqs)
Posted by: Christopher Taylor at January 05, 2010 01:05 PM (PQY7w)
Posted by: maddogg at January 05, 2010 01:05 PM (OlN4e)
No. They are equal opportunity offenders. Their most recent schtick was to protest military funerals. If they have a consistent view, it's pretty much anti-American.
I think they are opportunists only, it has very little to do with Phelps' sexual confusion anymore.
Oh, and for a gratuitous mention: Phelps is a lawyer. A civil rights attorney as a matter of fact.
Just like the guys at the ACLU.
Posted by: AmishDude at January 05, 2010 01:05 PM (Vo2Ef)
Posted by: Chuckles Johnson at January 05, 2010 01:09 PM (Cxsey)
Posted by: bowel movement at January 05, 2010 01:09 PM (Fd5yK)
Yeah, and several of his kids are lawyers, too. They know how to litigate.
Posted by: OregonMuse at January 05, 2010 01:11 PM (89RxY)
Posted by: bowel movement at January 05, 2010 05:09 PM (Fd5yK)
Oh, it's fine. I have my kids running on a treadmill. That's why you have so many -- a ready power source.
Posted by: AmishDude at January 05, 2010 01:12 PM (Vo2Ef)
Color me totally apathetic.
Posted by: nickless at January 05, 2010 01:12 PM (MMC8r)
What's not to like?
Posted by: Posted by: Huge, Quickly at January 05, 2010 05:08 PM (jVldi)
wake me up when Gaga can do something like this and give me woodhttp://tinyurl.com/yhpwl5l
Posted by: fartbubble at January 05, 2010 01:12 PM (cBeTr)
Posted by: bowel movement at January 05, 2010 01:12 PM (Fd5yK)
I didn't know he was a registered Democrat who has run in the Kansas Democratic primary for governor three times (and once for U.S. Senate). That's comedy gold.
Posted by: Caiwyn at January 05, 2010 01:13 PM (ttktr)
Posted by: Kanye West at January 05, 2010 01:17 PM (Vo2Ef)
Posted by: maddogg at January 05, 2010 01:18 PM (OlN4e)
Gosh, Beck is good at spookin' me... All the revelations on how Owe-bama is trying to ruin the country.
Damn fear monger.
Posted by: GregInSeattle at January 05, 2010 01:21 PM (B5cM9)
Posted by: ol_dirty_/b+/tard at January 05, 2010 01:21 PM (IoUF1)
Posted by: DanO at January 05, 2010 01:24 PM (RIxJG)
(ducks)
Posted by: citizen khan at January 05, 2010 01:24 PM (dNs5A)
Posted by: torabora at January 05, 2010 01:25 PM (LcHM4)
Posted by: Dr. Spank at January 05, 2010 01:26 PM (muUqs)
That's not Alice Cooper showing, Ace. It's Matthew Barney.
Lady Gaga has a big following among low-grade pseudo-snobs, and that's why. Seeing his style stolen and put on MTV is deep-down brain-stem-level validation for them, because they "get" the reference, and you, bitterly clinging to classic rock (that you can buy in a store! gross!), don't.
Don't compare Lady Gaga to Alice Cooper in front of any women you're trying to bang, is my point.
Posted by: oblig. at January 05, 2010 01:26 PM (FWvuv)
Posted by: torabora at January 05, 2010 05:25 PM (LcHM4)
Hello?!!
Posted by: Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan,Paris Hilton, Christina Aguilera and Tila Tequila at January 05, 2010 01:29 PM (Fbdn3)
Posted by: dorkafork at January 05, 2010 01:31 PM (WbRO8)
Posted by: KingShamus at January 05, 2010 01:32 PM (8n1j5)
Posted by: runningrn at January 05, 2010 01:34 PM (CfmlF)
Posted by: Kanye West at January 05, 2010 01:37 PM (Vo2Ef)
And that pretty much goes for Phred Felps, too.
Posted by: nickless at January 05, 2010 01:37 PM (MMC8r)
Posted by: Ace Ventura, Pet Detective at January 05, 2010 01:40 PM (0Wf6c)
Posted by: GregInSeattle at January 05, 2010 01:41 PM (B5cM9)
Ass hall of fame. Nina Hartley, Kim Kardasian, the black model on the Price Is Right, Jennifer Lopez parts A & B just to name a few.ii
Posted by: YIKES! at January 05, 2010 01:46 PM (FvSmd)
You know what's funny?
In a few years Lady Gaga will be on the big screen. Hollywood loves putting these twit-singers in movies. Does anyone doubt Gaga wants to start an acting career?
Posted by: Posted by: Huge, Quickly at January 05, 2010 01:51 PM (jVldi)
The Phelps clan are a nasty bunch. I wrote something critical about them on my blog and somehow they discovered it and routed all of their hate mail into my comment section.
Posted by: Slublog at January 05, 2010 01:51 PM (X28PR)
Posted by: People That Research G Spots at January 05, 2010 01:51 PM (LcHM4)
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 01:53 PM (7FgWm)
chicks with sticks.
If she wants to call her self a woman, she needs to dumb the dick. Really, if you think you are female, why keep the schwang? It makes no sense.
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 01:56 PM (7FgWm)
Blocked a third and fourth and sixth time. Damn you, Ace! I used no word just blank spaces and it still was rejected.
Try again:
Sigh, Hugo, I was wondering if Ace was going to cover the _____ event of the year, Casey Johnson's funeral, which Knockers McCain will also attend.
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 02:01 PM (7FgWm)
But to be honest, this is just Fred Phelps going "Pay attention to me! Pay attention to me! Look! Look! Are you looking?" If he was a kid, he'd be ten years old and hanging from the monkey bars. And, to continue the metaphor, I think it's time that we as the parent figure light a cigarette and continue to ignore him.
Posted by: Tungsten Monk at January 05, 2010 02:01 PM (Lbxn0)
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 02:02 PM (7FgWm)
Posted by: Rodent Liberation Front at January 05, 2010 02:05 PM (dQdrY)
chicks with sticks.
We did surgery on a Tranny once. She looked like a girl until we took the covers and her gown off. She had ran out of money and hadn't gotten the final cut off date paid for. It was quite weird putting the foley catheter in a penis when she had these huge fake knockers. Just thinking about it makes me shudder.
Posted by: runningrn at January 05, 2010 02:07 PM (CfmlF)
Posted by: runningrn at January 05, 2010 02:08 PM (CfmlF)
Thank you for giving me nightmares for the foreseeable future.
Posted by: Mortis at January 05, 2010 02:09 PM (hA5JK)
Posted by: Mortis at January 05, 2010 06:09 PM (hA5JK)
Sorry! My husband hates when I talk about work, especially at the dinner table!
Posted by: runningrn at January 05, 2010 02:11 PM (CfmlF)
Posted by: billygoat at January 05, 2010 02:12 PM (fh7Kf)
Posted by: Mortis at January 05, 2010 02:14 PM (hA5JK)
Posted by: billygoat at January 05, 2010 02:20 PM (fh7Kf)
10 Is Lady Ga Ga a guy? Or a woman?
First thing I thought of too, PGiS. Why else refer to one-self as "lady"? The term pop-tart seems made for her, and she think's she's a genius too, lolz!
Now Biff Naked, there's a WOMAN! (from my home town! Winnipeg has amazing numbers of really pretty women!) Ok, she's vegan and probably a looney-toons lefty, but she's hawt!
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 02:20 PM (O5yP8)
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 02:20 PM (7FgWm)
Posted by: pele at January 05, 2010 02:22 PM (yvIZY)
Posted by: nickless at January 05, 2010 02:24 PM (MMC8r)
Posted by: runningrn at January 05, 2010 02:25 PM (CfmlF)
Not a dude.
Posted by: Gossip is just gossip at January 05, 2010 02:26 PM (FXtfM)
Posted by: Keith Olbmerman at January 05, 2010 02:26 PM (T1boi)
Posted by: Ook Ook at January 05, 2010 02:27 PM (dQdrY)
Supposedly, Lady Ga Ga is a she that never had her he removed. She's a hermophrodite, but otherwise very feminine and a woman. A lot more common than people think.
Posted by: Blazer at January 05, 2010 02:27 PM (t72+4)
Posted by: Mortis at January 05, 2010 02:28 PM (hA5JK)
Posted by: Lone Marauder at January 05, 2010 02:30 PM (/bVuS)
I met Lady Gaga this past sunday night. The kidlet has some connections and got us in for the meet and greet. I can not say enough about her, she is the sweetest woman I've met in the entertainment field and I've met quite a few. She loves her fans! She's also worked very hard to get where she is, I guess now with the Phelps parody and Christina Aquilera asking if she was a man or not say she's made it!
And she is NO man, that's for sure. She's very pretty and very feminine.
Posted by: Mrs. Compton at January 05, 2010 02:31 PM (NaJ/S)
Posted by: runningrn at January 05, 2010 02:31 PM (CfmlF)
Immediately after a statement of support, most likely. It's his MO.
Posted by: dfbaskwill at January 05, 2010 02:32 PM (ndlFj)
Yup, looks like she is a he, or a them at least. If Gaga's a natural hermaphrodite then more power to her!
If it's a sergical freakshow then, bleh! Grow fat and unpopular. Like BoyGeorge.
http://tinyurl.com/yfqw3fu this one's pretty obvious, eh?
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 02:33 PM (O5yP8)
Posted by: Mortis at January 05, 2010 02:33 PM (hA5JK)
Posted by: Kasper Hauser at January 05, 2010 02:41 PM (ZiQz8)
Posted by: dorkafork at January 05, 2010 02:42 PM (WbRO8)
Actually, I'd bet that her management has decided that her primary stagecraft influence seems to be Alice Cooper, and has paid talented people lots of $$$ to make it look that way.
It's never about the artist. They're just the end product. Well, that and all the cash they make...
Posted by: shibumi at January 05, 2010 02:45 PM (OKZrE)
Posted by: Ted Kennedy's Gristle Encased Head at January 05, 2010 02:47 PM (+lsX1)
104 5cats, are you joking? I think that's another dude.
Naw-unh! Biff is 100% organic grrl!
Also a breast cancer survivour.
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 02:47 PM (O5yP8)
You know, I'm happy to say that I couldn't recognize Lady GaGa if (s)he fell out of the sky wearing a "Hello my Name is" sticker and fell on my head. I guess I could look at the Youtube embedded, if I gave a shit.
Posted by: random at January 05, 2010 02:47 PM (mhbHz)
Posted by: Evil Red Scandi at January 05, 2010 02:48 PM (erlfI)
Naw-unh! Biff is 100% organic grrl!
Also a breast cancer survivour.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----Did she have face cancer too?
Posted by: Ted Kennedy's Gristle Encased Head at January 05, 2010 02:50 PM (+lsX1)
Posted by: rightzilla at January 05, 2010 02:51 PM (rVJH4)
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Posted by: dsfghsdfhgsd at January 05, 2010 03:07 PM (QoyD5)
When a lady's dick is so large that the audience can see it when she is dancing on stage, she's a man. Or, even if she isn't, why would she keep it? A real woman wouldn't. They would say, Ew! Get away! Get it away from me! Cut it off!
If you were a man and had boobies, would you keep them? No! Because you are a man!
Anyway, Jugs one g or two, has latched on to Tila Tequila and her crazy, druggy, l word girl friends. They steal each others stuff and set each others hair on fire. But the absolute worse thing they do is adopt babies. And she thinks she is the spokes man for the republican party???? Kill me now!
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 03:15 PM (7FgWm)
First, you trick me and link me to the GHEYEST CHINESE MUSIC VIDEO EVER. I still take four showers a day to wash that filth off me.
NOW you link me to the Huffington Post.
STOP THE MADNESS!!!
Posted by: B+ at January 05, 2010 03:17 PM (hIOnV)
As for Phelps and his offspring, the last time they came picketing around Campbell, we got told we weren't allowed to arrange any accidents for them. Like it would have been any kind of tragedy to off the whole inbred mess of them. Those lunatics all need to die in a fire.
Posted by: SGT Dan at January 05, 2010 03:22 PM (HZpUJ)
If you were a man and had boobies, would you keep them? No! - moi
You know nothing of the ways of men morons. If we had boobies (and NOT moobs) we'd stay home all day with our hands under our shirts.
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 03:26 PM (O5yP8)
I actually like Lady Gaga. She's madonna-esque, but she can sing and isn't (so far) a dipshit.
I hate "christian" groups that tear their hair out over a pop song almost as much as I hate hippie dipshits.
I spent 5 years in prison a southern baptist congregation before I realized those fuckers are crazy.
Posted by: tangonine at January 05, 2010 03:35 PM (C8Pcc)
#134, it's a dick. Look down your pants and maybe you'll have seen one like it.
http://tinyurl.com/yhubvs4
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 03:36 PM (7FgWm)
Posted by: tangonine at January 05, 2010 03:38 PM (C8Pcc)
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 03:47 PM (7FgWm)
^^ Trannie court? Tranny raids?? Where exactly do you live moi?!?
And how many times have you arrested Ace?
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 03:53 PM (O5yP8)
And yeah, that's not pubic fuzz.
So the only question remains (for me at least) is natural person, or surgical freakshow?
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 03:56 PM (O5yP8)
Well the Internet appears to be awash in conflicting information about Lady Ga-Ga's gender. Gossip sites lean toward her being a hermaphrodite though nothing mainstream really mentions that.
She is bi-sexual, but that doesn't really mean anything in my opinion because it seems to me that pretty much every other female celebrity these days is.
Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at January 05, 2010 04:00 PM (RZ8pf)
P.S. The iTunes ReMixes are fun!
Posted by: MoJoTee at January 05, 2010 04:12 PM (mKpVf)
5Cats: I use to work in Hollywood.
Since the deceased Casey Johnson gave Tila a 7 carat engagment ring, does she know she is obligated to return it because this mythical gay marriage is off?
I still like to know where the kid is. Probably farmed it with a maid..
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 04:13 PM (7FgWm)
Posted by: toby928 at January 05, 2010 04:31 PM (PD1tk)
I can't BELIEVE I am saying this, but according to her BFF Perez Hilton, who has seen her narked, she isnt packing any extra equipment. Which seemed to be quite a disappointment to him, BTW. If she was, it would be miniscule. Have you seen the Bad Romance vid? Those panties dont hide woo woos.
God hates people? Hmmm.
Posted by: di butler at January 05, 2010 04:46 PM (S3xX1)
Thanks for answering moi, I'd have died of curiosity! Lolz! Holly-weird has it all, eh?
di butler, you believe a word that sub-human puss has to say? (puss, rhymes with 'us', not puss as in pussy-cat)
Posted by: 5Cats at January 05, 2010 04:53 PM (O5yP8)
Posted by: di butler at January 05, 2010 05:05 PM (S3xX1)
Posted by: tangonine at January 05, 2010 05:25 PM (C8Pcc)
Posted by: Nozzle at January 05, 2010 05:47 PM (lxg2b)
Posted by: B+ at January 05, 2010 05:54 PM (hIOnV)
Posted by: Boy George at January 05, 2010 05:57 PM (aMIyx)
Lady Gaga is the equivalent of having a mad scientist extend Cher's life for another generation. Clive Barker has nothing on this shit.
Posted by: Johnny at January 05, 2010 07:00 PM (xVKXy)
Posted by: St. Agnostica at January 05, 2010 07:19 PM (gbCNS)
Just make sure you're on top Ace.
He was, at first.
Then I said to myself "Who am I?"
HA! I knew the answer. Then, I was . . .
Rough.
But I apologized, during withdrawal.
Then we smoked an e-cigarette.
Meh.
Posted by: Lady Gaga with Spoons at January 05, 2010 07:42 PM (oQ4X1)
#150 5Cats, if you go out between certain hours on certain streets, it's wall to wall trannie hookers. The cops use to do regular sweeps.
Posted by: moi at January 05, 2010 09:12 PM (7FgWm)
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Posted by: toby928 at January 05, 2010 12:47 PM (PD1tk)