1

"She's moving art," said Art. "You don't even notice that she's there."

Art is obviously a homo.

2 No pictures. I mean, WTF?

3 Hi, Ace!

4

Would anyone have cared if they'd gone to a club featuring the Pussycat Dolls?

It's the "lesbian bondage" codewords that made this blow up into a big deal.  Meanwhile, I expect that Democrat candidates do fundraising at the Folsom Street Fair in S.F. without anyone raising an eyebrow.

5
Sounds like there's more sex in Sex & The City than this club.

6 I was under the impression that this story was leaked by insiders who wanted to oust Steele????

7

Club Voyeur?

That's that hawaiian burger joint...isn't it?

I hear they have some tasssttyyy burgers.

8 As a thinking man, a slave to reason, I'm not willing to pass judgment based on second-hand accounts from unreliable sources.

Extensive first-hand experience (preferably funded by a generous per-diem grant and an open bar tab) is warranted before I am willing to form an opinion.

9

Basically, it seems like an upscale mock-gothic cerebralized Hooters.

I dunno. The whole idea of the "girls are almost naked" club is like eating a cone without the ice cream. What's the point?

I was in LA for awhile back when the Pussycat Dolls first started doing the Viper Room (with Christiana "Kelly Bundy" Applegate sitting in). That whole thing was kind of a pseudo-burlesque throwback that ultimately suffered from the same problem: too much arty frou-frou and not enough barenaked wimmens. In other words: it was the kind of thing that gay men and other women imagine nudie bars to be rather than what they actually are.*

*Which is to say, a skanky chick with no clothes on dancing badly to a rock song that is at least five years past its sell-by date. Bullet scars, needle tracks, bad tats, and that ineffable smell of dried sweat and cigarette smoke.

 

10
I always got the impression a Hawaiian burger is just a regular burger with a pineapple on it. Do they even grow pineapples in Hawaii, anymore?

11 Like Hooters?  They have wings there?

12

LA Times Head Blogger Visits Club Voyeur And For Fuck's Sake Can Anyone Tell Me If Lemon Juice Will Get The Stink Off My Hands!!?!

/fixed

13 Me and me droogs, which was Michael Steele, and John Conryn, and Pete Sessions, was at the Voyeur Molocco Bar....

14 7 A bit of the old in-out in-out then?

Posted by: Alex DeLarge at April 19, 2010 03:13 PM (PD1tk)

And a bit of the old (simulated) ultra-violence

15

If that crap is "high art" then the old fashioned peep shows are equally high art. Bullshit. It's just cheesy voyeurism, nothing more. Why not man up and go to a real strip joint?

 

16
upscale mock-gothic cerebralized Hooters.

Now that's a mouthful.

17

Bullet scars, needle tracks, bad tats, and that ineffable smell of dried sweat and cigarette smoke.

Mom?

18 So they didn't let you in Ace?

19 Like Hooters?  They have wings there?

Posted by: kansas at April 19, 2010 03:17 PM (mka2b)

I thought it was the Victoria Secret angels who had wings?

20 You want to see an S&M club, I'll show you an S&M club!

21
Why not man up and go to a real strip joint?

And for fucks sake use cash.

22 upscale mock-gothic cerebralized Hooters.

Now that's a mouthful.

Posted by: Dang Straights at April 19, 2010 03:18 PM (fx8sm)

When it comes to hooters, as Frank Zappa said, more than a mouthful is wasted.

23 There is a problem with the AE-35 unit, you need to go outside and repair it.

24 Why not man up and go to a real strip joint?

LOL, they get to charge even more at the "arty" place for drinks.  That means you can expect the tab to be real high and you can forget the lap dances.

25 God bless you, ace.  I believe you were one of the very few bloggers who didn't get the vapors over this thing and YOU WERE RIGHT. 

26

LA Times Head Blogger Visits Club Voyeur And For Fuck's Sake Can Anyone Tell Me If Lemon Juice Will Get The Stink Off My Hands!!?!

/fixed

Posted by: laceyunderalls at April 19, 2010 03:17 PM (pLTLS)

Why the hell would he want to get the stink off his hands?  Think about it: he just has to dip his pinky in a glass of tomato juice and voila, instant Clamato.  Add beer and it's a chelada!!

27 25 Why not man up and go to a real strip joint?

LOL, they get to charge even more at the "arty" place for drinks.  That means you can expect the tab to be real high and you can forget the lap dances.

on the other hand, they'll probably save a bundle on antibiotics.

28

It's the "lesbian bondage" codewords that made this blow up into a big deal.  Meanwhile, I expect that Democrat candidates do fundraising at the Folsom Street Fair in S.F. without anyone raising an eyebrow.

Posted by: stuiec at April 19, 2010 03:12 PM (7AOgy)

Hell they'd give away dildoes with their campaign slogans on it if it would get them votes.

29

LOL, they get to charge even more at the "arty" place for drinks.  That means you can expect the tab to be real high and you can forget the lap dances.

Lap dances? Are they still $5.00? It's been a while......

30

One of the most hilarious things in the world is to go to one of those "upscale" strip bars like Shotgun Willie's in Denver or The Body Shop in Houston and see all the dudes trying mightily to act like they just stopped by on the way to somewhere else; like they're only there because the all-you-can-eat wings are so good or because they play the ballgame on the big-screen TV. Good wings and public TV are totally worth the twenty-dollar cover charge and eight bucks per bottle of shitty domestic beer they serve.

It really satisfies my burned-up cinder of a heart to see some backslapping douchebag blow a month's pay (in rumpled fives, tens, and twenties) on some gyrating high-dollar porno actress*, and speculate how he's going to break the news to the wife when he stumbles in the door at three AM. ("There were three of 'em, hon! Gang-bangers, I think! I was gonna fight back, but they all had guns and all I could think of was you and little Jeffrey!")

*Somewhere in the Shoebox Of Mysteries that I lost in a move some years ago, I had a Polaroid of me with noted adult-film performer Nina Hartley. She looks a lot older close-up than she did in the promo stills, but was a very nice lady all the same. Though she did turn down my drunken offer of marriage.

 

31 I literally work about a block away from the place and its pretty small and innocuous looking from the outside.It is on Santa Monica blvd and Fairfax which is an area where just the average store front is mighty risque

32

If that crap is "high art" then the old fashioned peep shows are equally high art. Bullshit. It's just cheesy voyeurism, nothing more. Why not man up and go to a real strip joint?

Posted by: maddogg at April 19, 2010 03:18 PM (OlN4e)

there was a lot of art in the old burlesque shows. Hell, there was a lot of art in the first nickle pornos. Sure, the art was there to get around the indecency laws but it was still art none the less.

33 Monty. I figured out when I was still young that when it comes to strip clubs, you ain't gonna get laid, but you can get fucked

34 I think the GOP missed the boat on this one..

They should have immediately come out with a statement that said the GOP is seeking to strengthen its relationship with members of the GLBT community!

35 wow, the press lied when it was reporting on conservatives or members of the GOP? Here's a rule of thumb I use: Any time the media reports on anything without a complete picture, audio, or video, they are lying. If they are summarizing, they are lying.

36 Any one know of way we can get Ace and the fired staffer hooked up for blind date in NYC? She seems perfect ...

37

Hell they'd give away dildoes with their campaign slogans on it if it would get them votes.

Posted by: buzzion at April 19, 2010 03:29 PM (oVQFe)

What do you mean, "would"?

38
She seems perfect ...

How do you know she's into furries?

39 Dang, the gap between Lesbian Bondage and trussed up Ewok can't be that wide.

40 So if I donate $100k, the GOP will take me to a classy joint, what will the Democrats offer?

41 So if I donate $100k, the GOP will take me to a classy joint, what will the Democrats offer?

Posted by: Penfold at April 19, 2010 04:00 PM (1PeEC)

one odd night in Bangkok

42 wait, wasn't that a song to a play?

43

Really? We're going with the "I visited one night, and it totally wasn't!" defense? Let's at least have a defense that passes the "I never leave my basement" level. Clubs can have different themes for different nights. Some nights can be racier than others.

But then again, this hill isn't really worth dying on anyway, so I'll drop it. But continue to color me unconvinced on this club's innocence.

44 There's no nudity and no actual sex or even seriously-simulated sex.

It's a trap!

Posted by: Admiral Ackbar at April 19, 2010 04:07 PM (PD1tk)

Let me get this straight: simulated girl-on-girl hanky-panky is perversion when it's observed by Young Republicans, but a girl in a bondage bikini with a collar and leash being held by a two-ton slimy sentient amphibian is wholesome family entertainment?

45 It all depends on the audience.

46 "...I had a Polaroid of me with noted adult-film performer Nina Hartley."

Small world: me too.  She's a genuinely nice person, but an off-the-charts left-winger.

47

some straight men seem to relax their views under certain conditions -- such as when it involves naughty-looking vixens in slap leather and spike heels.

Or schoolgirl or nurse outfits

48 40 Dang, the gap between Lesbian Bondage and trussed up Ewok can't be that wide.

Posted by: Jean at April 19, 2010 03:50 PM (OlnxK)

Trust me, it's a pretty big friggin' gap. 

49

She's a genuinely nice person, but an off-the-charts left-winger.

I used to know a guy who did post-production on "adult films" until his wife made him quit. The porn industry really is a grotesque and filthy business.

Most of the performers are deeply, deeply damaged human beings. It's not so much that they're politically liberal so much as that they're just fringe due to the lifestyles they lead. Oh, the holdovers from the "old days" are deep-blue libs: So-Cal Jerry Brown acolytes who bought completely into the "do your own thing" 1970's culture. But a combination of AIDS, OD's, murders, and suicides have taken a lot of the old "just havin' fun" sheen off the biz. (It always was a sleazy business, but at least before 1980 or so, the porn merchants could convince themselves that it was all just good fun.)

I talked to an LAPD detective back in the mid-90's who told me how many of these young girls who get into the business end up dead before they're 30. Not many ever get out of the business, either: most end up as straight-up prostitutes or "exotic dancers", strung out on drugs, until their looks are gone. When the looks are gone and the money dries up, lots of them just opt out with drugs or a razor or a long walk off a tall building.

 

50 Monty, you are just a little ray of sunshine on an otherwise cloudy afternoon.....

51 No nudity?

That's just not true. 

No need for a whitewash.  Some dumb kids did something dumb.  The real problem was that the RNC comped stupid shit a lot, not that one or many of the comps were sleazy.

That's not really the problem, but this place indeed had nudity and sim sex acts, not just artsy, though I guess that's a matter of opinion.  I do not think the workers seriously think it is high art. 

We don't need to cover for Steele.  I think he's the leader through the 2010 elections, so by all means, ignore the attack until after the election, but it's annoying that he's in place and people are covering for his terrible leadership.  Spending has been irresponsible in many ways no matter how slutty this club was.

Now, it's easy to make a non sequitur about this.  There aren't lap dances or prostitution.  This is hardly a traditional strip club.  But it's a place where Lindsey Lohan and Paris Hilton and other extremely wealthy celebs dropped thousands on individual items.  It's a place where you snort cocaine off a glass cube with two girls locked inside pretending to have sex. 

The claim that there's no nudity is simply a lie... but no, it's not a strip club.  I don't think that really matters.  It's a scummy place the GOP shouldn't be paying anyone to visit   They should have denied the comp, but the entire culture there is cronyism.

52 Dang, the gap between Lesbian Bondage and trussed up Ewok can't be that wide.

Posted by: Jean at April 19, 2010 03:50 PM (OlnxK)

Trust me, it's a pretty big friggin' gap. 

Posted by: trussed up Ewok at April 19, 2010 04:35 PM (DrWcr)

Especially when the spit-roasting starts.

53 does margret carlson still have that sexually frustrated bitch look going on with velma glasses from scooby doo?

54 You seem to be going to a lot of effort to minimize the fact that under Michael Steele, these are the sorts of places that Republicans can expect their RNC campaign donations to be spent at?

Is the point you're making, Ace, that we should think this is OK?

Because if that's your point why don't you just come right out and say it.

I don't think it's OK. But if you think that the Republican Party should have no qualms about spending our RNC campaign donations at LA strip clubs' then I think you owe it to Republicans to fucking say so.

Quit dancing around the head of this pin, dude.

55 The RNC is running a $16 million deficit six months out of the most important elections in teh country and Michael Steele is largely responsible for that.

He's been spending RNC money to privately enrich himself and sell his books at fancy $9,000/a night hotels while he's been bankrupting our national political organization.

Any white man similarly situation would be fired for running our operation that far into the fucking ground and Michael Steele should be fired for it too The fact that he is black should not be preventing the Republican leadership from firing him for his poor performance.

Martin Luther King had a dream. He dreamt that one day, Michale Steele would be judged not by the color of his skin, but by the content of our fucking RNC bank account.

Well you know what? It's empty. It's Michael Steele's fault.

Fire his fucking ass.

56

*Somewhere in the Shoebox Of Mysteries that I lost in a move some years ago, I had a Polaroid of me with noted adult-film performer Nina Hartley. She looks a lot older close-up than she did in the promo stills, but was a very nice lady all the same. Though she did turn down my drunken offer of marriage.

 

Posted by: Monty


I still have my Polaroid of Cheri Taylor and me from when I worked at Deja Vu in Memphis many moons ago.  It was shortly after the club opened and I was the only Memphis "native" as all the other help was imported from Nashville and Michigan clubs to get our club off the ground.  Anyway, I got to spend the weekend w/ her, showing her around town.  Very nice and lots o' fun.

57 I don't think it's OK. But if you think that the Republican Party should have no qualms about spending our RNC campaign donations at LA strip clubs' then I think you owe it to Republicans to fucking say so.

Quit dancing around the head of this pin, dude.

Posted by: someguy at April 19, 2010 06:22 PM (VRJIW)

Here's a question: should the RNC spend some of the donors' own money to take them out on the town -- even if it's for a Grand Slam at Denny's?  Strip club aside, is donor relations an appropriate use of donated funds?  And how is it different from the rubber-chicken dinner, where part of the per-plate charge is returned to the donor in the form of dinner, drinks and a floor show?

58 >>>Because if that's your point why don't you just come right out and say it. I think it's okay.

59 I think, basically, it's like a Hooters, and I think it's fine to tut-tut that, but seriously, not everyone shares in this "Be Christ-like at all times" ethic and it's kind of annoying to insist that nonbelievers or semi-believers follow it. Most guys really don't think a bit of female sexuality on display is something to have a lot of anguish over. I'm one of them. If it's the money issue -- again, you'll have to explain why it's okay to have a rubber-chicken dinner (and spend money on open bar and dinner and maybe a comic for entertainment) but doing this on a completely ad hoc, impromptu basis is suddenly cause for geshreien.

60 I mean, it's a sexy bar. It's not a sex club. It's a sexy bar. I just don't get the moral panic over this. I understand disapproval, but some of the genuine anger over taking some donors unofficially out to an upscale Hooters seems unnecessarily Calvinist to me. Like, if I were part of that group? I totally would have wanted to check the place out. I just have trouble judging people over crap I'd do myself. The RNC person, by the way, did not suggest that club. It was the donors themselves who suggested it and then seconded it. She just went along with them. I guess we should stop peddling this "We're kind of hip" PR line, because it's bullshit. We're not hip or chill. We're a bunch of people who scream over trivialities and we should embrace that reality rather than lying about it.

61 When it comes to Democrats, anything goes, boy whorehouses, Arab cash bribes, congressional tickle fights, freebasing cocaine wit yo ho. But of course the state controlled media applies a completely different standard to Republicans. And amazingly, the excuse is always the same from Dems and their apologists: it's not the offense, it's the hypocrisy.

62 Sounds like the place from the movie 'Flashdance'.