Ace of Spades HQ

March 03, 2010

Old And Busted: Real Prosperity
The New Hotness: Faux Prosperity
— Purple Avenger

I think the Brits are on to something here.

...decimated by the recession - fake business facades have been installed to create the illusion that shops are still occupied...

Prosperity, its just a state of mind. I plan on going to Kinkos later today and printing up a few million faux bucks so I can impress my friends with my new found prosperity. That and the new $29 cardboard Ferrari I ordered parked in the driveway should have me rolling phat in no time.

Nothing says you're flush like flashing around a shoebox full of monopoly money. After this positive outlook adjustment, I should be fully qualified to chair the house ways and means committee.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at 08:32 AM | Comments (80)
Post contains 134 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Reminds me of the decals they put on the windows of abandoned buildings in the South Bronx in the 70's.

Posted by: Oschisms at March 03, 2010 08:34 AM (/0W0y)

2 They're putting the Potemkin back in the Village!

Posted by: Adjoran at March 03, 2010 08:34 AM (HeULl)

3 "Nothing says you're flush like flashing around a shoebox full of monopoly money. After this positive outlook adjustment, I should be fully qualified to chair the house ways and means committee."

Oh, that was no monopoly money Charlie had- it was real for sure, ill gotten, but real nonetheless.

Posted by: Nighthawk at March 03, 2010 08:36 AM (OtQXp)

...I should be fully qualified to chair the house ways and means committee.

Only if you pay your taxes with this newly-printed prosperity.

Posted by: Gunslinger at March 03, 2010 08:36 AM (Zi+FQ)

5
Sounds like the phenomenon of making people wait in line outside empty bars so that they look popular to people who are driving by.

Posted by: dan-O at March 03, 2010 08:36 AM (+9Rf8)

6 Botox economy.

Posted by: WalrusRex at March 03, 2010 08:38 AM (xxgag)

7 You can put lipstick on a pig, but it still ain't going to whisper "I love you" when the two of you make love.

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at March 03, 2010 08:38 AM (KeOQp)

8 In the words of Nancy Pelosi...

"But we're creating jobs."

Posted by: Winston at March 03, 2010 08:39 AM (FggW0)

9 @8 That's why I don't make love to a pig, I pork it.

Posted by: Dave@ at March 03, 2010 08:39 AM (TGifK)

10 The cardboard food tastes funny, but still has more nutritional value than McDonald's.

Posted by: Dr. Spank at March 03, 2010 08:40 AM (0FiCa)

11 This is a great example of the "Perception is Reality" myth that pervades the thinking on the left. Anybody who has ever been unemployed (and that group includes me) knows the simple truth that Perception is NOT Reality...

REALITY IS REALITY!!

Posted by: Nighthawk at March 03, 2010 08:40 AM (OtQXp)

12 We already have these. Haven't you seen the American Recovery Act signs along the roads? Right next to the non-existent road-work projects.

Posted by: Penn State Marine at March 03, 2010 08:40 AM (8KFCG)

13 It seems like an upgrade in comparing the before and after pics. Of course, they could have slapped some paint on the building too.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 03, 2010 08:40 AM (cpuvG)

After this positive outlook adjustment, I should be fully qualified to chair the house ways and means committee.

only if you start using massive amounts of Brylcreem...

Posted by: conscious, but incoherent at March 03, 2010 08:41 AM (Vu6sl)

15 I would sponsor a Vandelay Industries facade.

Posted by: Dave@ at March 03, 2010 08:43 AM (TGifK)

16 The local mall has been doing this for some time. Businesses close, so they throw up colorful drapes over the empty shop windows, touting "New Business Coming Soon!". I'd really like to see what their definition of "soon" is. Some of those signs have been up for over a year now.

Posted by: GarandFan at March 03, 2010 08:43 AM (6mwMs)

17
Reminds me of the fake radio faceplate you'd stick in your cassette player opening so people wouldn't see your expensive car stereo.

Posted by: This is Candygram at March 03, 2010 08:43 AM (z37MR)

18 Saw this at Hot Air, check out the caption and get ready to laugh. Probably deserves it's own thread for comedic value alone.

Posted by: Dr. Spank at March 03, 2010 08:43 AM (0FiCa)

19 Win!

Posted by: Yeah, I know it was Ford first, but it's still fun to blame Carter at March 03, 2010 08:44 AM (Xsi7M)

20 I use my blow up doll to display my c0cksman prosperity.

Posted by: Typical AoSHQ Male Moron at March 03, 2010 08:44 AM (Q41Zh)

21 Latex is the future.

Posted by: Vandelay Indus. at March 03, 2010 08:44 AM (cpuvG)

22 Well, ya gotta admit, it looks better than a "Crack Whores Unlimited" sign.

Posted by: maddogg at March 03, 2010 08:44 AM (OlN4e)

23 REALITY IS REALITY!!

Posted by: Nighthawk at March 03, 2010 12:40 PM (OtQXp)

DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL! DON'T TELL ME REALITY IS REALITY! I CAN'T HANDLE REALITY!

Posted by: the liberal version of Jack Nicholson at March 03, 2010 08:44 AM (Vu6sl)

24 This idea is so good, I'm surprised it didn't originate in Congress.

Posted by: Fresh Air at March 03, 2010 08:44 AM (gJV9g)

25 I plan on going to Kinkos later today and printing up a few million faux bucks Timmy Turbo Tax will throw you in jail for that. Only Timmy gets to print the scrip. Timmy and his friends.

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 08:45 AM (AZGON)

26 Or you could lend yourself a few billion real bucks and call it a Trust Fund. That is, if you'd rather run the Social Security Administration.

Posted by: Cerebral Paul Z. at March 03, 2010 08:45 AM (FLFli)

27 So I can actually put up a sign and say I work for Veridian Dynamics? Sweet!

Posted by: alexthechick at March 03, 2010 08:45 AM (8WZWv)

28 Saw this at Hot Air, check out the caption and get ready to laugh. Probably deserves it's own thread for comedic value alone. I don't get it.

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 08:46 AM (AZGON)

29 Alex,

Do that, then petition your local gov't saying you're "too big to fail"

Posted by: Dave@ at March 03, 2010 08:47 AM (TGifK)

30 @ 29 took me a second too. Look at the caption under the angels.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 03, 2010 08:47 AM (cpuvG)

31 A STICKER ON EVERY FACADE

Posted by: Barry Hoover at March 03, 2010 08:48 AM (5I0Yr)

32 Saw this at Hot Air, check out the caption and get ready to laugh. Probably deserves it's own thread for comedic value alone. Thank Gaia the Gatekeepers of Truth are batting one thousand. Or one thousandth. What's a few decimal points, anyway.

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 08:49 AM (AZGON)

33 Which midget fairy is Hillary?

Posted by: s'moron at March 03, 2010 08:49 AM (UaxA0)

34 What time does Odumbass puke all over our TV screens today? I want to make sure mine is turned off.

Posted by: conscious and avoiding the today's puke fest at March 03, 2010 08:49 AM (Vu6sl)

35 26 I plan on going to Kinkos later today and printing up a few million faux bucks

Timmy Turbo Tax will throw you in jail for that. Only Timmy gets to print the scrip. Timmy and his friends.

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 12:45 PM (AZGON)

You got that right. And the government are the only people who can run a Ponzi scheme too- that's why Bernie Madoff is in prison and FDR has a national monument built in his honor.

Posted by: Nighthawk at March 03, 2010 08:49 AM (OtQXp)

36 Concentrating like a laser on jobs

Posted by: dagny at March 03, 2010 08:49 AM (g6POu)

37 Slightly OT - Scott Brown's first piece of legislation is to take left over stimulus money and use it for a payroll tax cut. Yep, I'll take this 50% with us guy over Coakley every time.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 03, 2010 08:50 AM (cpuvG)

Prosperity, its just a state of mind. I plan on going to Kinkos later today and printing up a few million faux bucks so I can impress my friends with my new found prosperity.

Didn't they used to call that a "Kansas City Bankroll". You took sheets from a Sears and Roebuck catelog and rolled them up inside a twenty and flashed it at suckers when running a scam.

Posted by: Vic at March 03, 2010 08:50 AM (QrA9E)

39 As soon as the mentions of Vandelay Industries and cardboard food, the ad pops over to Jason Alexander selling Jenny Craig.

Dammit Baldo, I know I'm fat, just because I made a reference to something you did in make believe land doesn't mean I want to eat your cardboard food.

Posted by: Dave@ at March 03, 2010 08:50 AM (TGifK)

40 34 Which midget fairy is Hillary?

Posted by: s'moron at March 03, 2010 12:49 PM (UaxA0)

The one wearing the pantsuit.

Posted by: conscious and avoiding today's puke fest at March 03, 2010 08:50 AM (Vu6sl)

41 A lot of small-town Main Streets look like the scene sets for Pottersville - white-washed windows, dark and empty stores.

Posted by: mrp at March 03, 2010 08:51 AM (HjPtV)

42 People starving a la Atlas Shrugs should take care of the obesity problem

Posted by: dagny at March 03, 2010 08:51 AM (g6POu)

@19

I saw on your link the government wants to put brake overrides on cars. I, as a mechanical engineer, have a simple solution that doesn't involve a bunch of government bureaucrats.......Don't put the accelerator, cruise control, brakes, lights, window motors, etc. through the Goddamned computer. Then the computer can't fuck up a system that has been 100 years in developing and is bulletproof as any system can get.

Posted by: maddogg at March 03, 2010 08:52 AM (OlN4e)

44 I just found out that my house gives the faux illusion of prosperity. A lady from Poland came by and remarked how she loved my antiques, then proceeded to tell me about all the antiques in Poland. I could have lied and said thanks, but I told her I don't have any antiques; I just like the style. Was I wrong to make her look stupid, or was I wrong being honest? At any rate, I know she won't be burglarizing my house.

Posted by: Antimatter at March 03, 2010 08:52 AM (gbCNS)

45 The new High Maintenance Girlfriend

Posted by: franksalterego at March 03, 2010 08:52 AM (+6fgE)

46 @ 29 took me a second too. Look at the caption under the angels. What? Looks like Clinton and the Chilean President to me. sarc, fellas!

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 08:52 AM (AZGON)

47 Seems to me that they are just advertising available retail space. This is a far more compelling advert for the space than, say, brown papered windows with a "for rent" sign. Check out the image again. It's pretty clear that this is advertising, and not an attempt to make people think that there's a real store there.

Posted by: Lickmuffin at March 03, 2010 08:53 AM (UhcQ0)

48 45 I just found out that my house gives the faux illusion of prosperity. A lady from Poland came by and remarked how she loved my antiques, then proceeded to tell me about all the antiques in Poland. I could have lied and said thanks, but I told her I don't have any antiques; I just like the style. Was I wrong to make her look stupid, or was I wrong being honest? At any rate, I know she won't be burglarizing my house.

Posted by: Antimatter at March 03, 2010 12:52 PM (gbCNS)

Before we can determine if you are wrong, we need to know whether you are a liberal or conservative, and whether you voted for Obama.

Posted by: conscious and avoiding the Obama puke fest today at March 03, 2010 08:55 AM (Vu6sl)

49 Didn't they do this in The Sting?

Course it seems more like The Road to Perdition.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 03, 2010 08:55 AM (cpuvG)

50 Businesses close, so they throw up colorful drapes over the empty shop windows, touting "New Business Coming Soon!".

It's even sadder when they "donate" unrentable space for community group meeting rooms. Please bring your Scrabble club to the mall! The food court desperately needs the traffic from the senior-citizen-discount coffee!

Posted by: HeatherRadish at March 03, 2010 08:55 AM (mR7mk)

51 decimated by the recession - fake business facades have been installed to create the illusion that shops are still occupied

This is a level of pathetic I have never seen. Faking buildings to look prosperous? Really? Wait, wait, no I'm wrong, Propaganda city in North Korea. That must be where the UK soft socialists got the idea of how to make utter failure look like success.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose at March 03, 2010 08:56 AM (0q2P7)

52 Creating fake businesses probably created or save 3 billion jobs!!! Prosperity through fakery comrades.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 03, 2010 08:57 AM (1Jaio)

53 Didn't Obama use this trick at Invesco Feild with the columns to make him appear presidential when all he is, is an empty suit.

Posted by: Buzzsaw at March 03, 2010 08:58 AM (tf9Ne)

54 Do they permit fake mosques, or would that make Muhammed righteously outraged?

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 08:58 AM (AZGON)

55 @52 ...Faking buildings to look prosperous?...

Posted by: MikeTheMoose at March 03, 2010 12:56 PM (0q2P7)

Maybe it's just a ruse to lure the bad guys in so that Sheriff Bart and the townspeople of Rock Ridge can swoop in and "wipe 'em out!"

Posted by: Nighthawk at March 03, 2010 08:59 AM (OtQXp)

56 Sign makers and printers are booming.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at March 03, 2010 09:00 AM (L5JCP)

57 Didn't Obama use this trick at Invesco Feild with the columns to make him appear presidential He wanted an imperial toga and fasces like Caesar but the costumer was out of town.

Posted by: George Orwell at March 03, 2010 09:00 AM (AZGON)

It reminds me a bit of the joke about the Soviet Union that Reagan used to tell:

The party official asks a farmer how things are going, and the farmer replies that the harvest is so bountiful that the potatoes would reach the ''foot of God'' if piled on top of one another.

''But this is the Soviet Union,'' says the commissar, ''there is no God here.'' The farmer replies, ''That's all right, there are no potatoes, either.''

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 03, 2010 09:01 AM (1Jaio)

59 Come on, boys! The way you're lollygaggin' around here with them picks and them shovels, you'd think it was a hundert an' twenty degree. Can't be more than a hundert an' fourteen.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 03, 2010 09:01 AM (cpuvG)

No babies = no children.

No children = no teenagers.

No teenagers = no young adults.

No young adults = no grown-ups.

What you are seeing here is the inevitable result of four decades of sub-replacement-level fertility in the civilized world: First the buildings go empty, then whole street blocks go empty, and finally, before you know it, there are ghost towns popping up all over the countryside.

Allahu Akbar, and whatnot...

Posted by: at March 03, 2010 09:02 AM (kyg+f)

49 Before we can determine if you are wrong, we need to know whether you are a liberal or conservative, and whether you voted for Obama.

Posted by: conscious and avoiding the Obama puke fest today at March 03, 2010 12:55 PM (Vu6sl)

I'll admit, I got a perverse pleasure in making her look stupid, her being from socialist Europe.

Posted by: Antimatter at March 03, 2010 09:03 AM (gbCNS)

62 Like I said: Cargo Cult Put up things that look like businesses and you get prosperity. Makes perfect sense.

Posted by: moviegique at March 03, 2010 09:04 AM (ey5wt)

63 60 Come on, boys! The way you're lollygaggin' around here with them picks and them shovels, you'd think it was a hundert an' twenty degree. Can't be more than a hundert an' fourteen.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 03, 2010 01:01 PM (cpuvG)

LOL!

Posted by: Nighthawk at March 03, 2010 09:04 AM (OtQXp)

64 I work for you! All offers considered!

Posted by: Prince Potemkin (but you can call me "Greg") at March 03, 2010 09:07 AM (HjPtV)

65
They should turn the neighborhood into a giant urban paintball battlefield.

I'm just thinkin' out loud here.

Posted by: Dang at March 03, 2010 09:09 AM (UA4gE)

66 51 Businesses close, so they throw up colorful drapes over the empty shop windows, touting "New Business Coming Soon!".

It's even sadder when they "donate" unrentable space for community group meeting rooms. Please bring your Scrabble club to the mall! The food court desperately needs the traffic from the senior-citizen-discount coffee!

Posted by: HeatherRadish at March 03, 2010 12:55 PM (mR7mk)

We got the "Kids Play Place" that used to be about 4-5 bigger stores that closed. They made it into a kids playground area with a few cheap plastic otys and a cheesy plastic gate around the place.

Posted by: Johnnyreb at March 03, 2010 09:10 AM (WGcw3)

67 maybe they could do this to Helen Thomas' facade?

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Meteors, and buckets of scorn for the left at March 03, 2010 09:10 AM (erIg9)

68 So if I go and put my "Monopoly Man" outfit on, then people will start giving me lots of money, right?

Posted by: MrCaniac at March 03, 2010 09:13 AM (Vol3D)

How many of us actually saw / met HRC in real life?

In other words, how do we know the 'normal pic' of HRC is not one of these cardboard illusions to make her more life like attractive?

Posted by: always right at March 03, 2010 09:15 AM (0AClR)

70 Do that, then petition your local gov't saying you're "too big to fail"

Well, there are only four governments more powerful than Veridian.

Posted by: alexthechick at March 03, 2010 09:26 AM (8WZWv)

71 70 "attractive"?

Posted by: unknown jane at March 03, 2010 09:27 AM (5/yRG)

Which is a direct result of the requirement for 2 income households in order to repeat the previous generations standard of living while paying punitive taxes.

Posted by: dagny at March 03, 2010 09:35 AM (g6POu)

Ok, does anybody else here get the same idea, those fake storefronts plastered on those buildings looks a lot like a pair of cheapo "rims" from Wallie World slapped on an aging Cutlass with a torn vinyl roof and a body with a camo pattern of rust, faded factory paint, and at least two different colors of primer?

It's an insult to a person's intelligence, not to mention just sad, sad, sad. And the article "oooh, look how much better it looks now"...oh please, really?

Posted by: unknown jane at March 03, 2010 09:39 AM (5/yRG)

Which is a direct result of the requirement for 2 income households in order to repeat the previous generations standard of living while paying punitive taxes.

I don't know if I would use the word "result" [they are more like parallel phenomena], but it's certainly a vicious circle that these socialist-nihilist societies find themselves trapped in - the nation of Greece is about to collapse because of it - there are not enough young people left to pay for all the freebies that the Greek "Baby Boomers" have promised themselves on their 60th birthdays.

Posted by: at March 03, 2010 10:09 AM (kyg+f)

75 "Whip Inflation Now". Get your button to show you're on board with the fight against inflation.

Posted by: OCBill at March 03, 2010 10:12 AM (WGXy4)

"I plan on going to Kinkos later today and printing up a few million faux bucks so I can impress my friends with my new found prosperity."

Gonna be a long wait behind Turbo Tax Timmy and Helicopter Ben - bring a book.

Posted by: Fa Cube Itches at March 03, 2010 11:11 AM (kmEfr)

77 12 - This is a great example of the "Perception is Reality" myth that pervades the thinking on the left. Anybody who has ever been unemployed (and that group includes me) knows the simple truth that Perception is NOT Reality...

REALITY IS REALITY!!

Reality is just a racist construction, like logic and reason.

Posted by: Bitsko at March 03, 2010 11:48 AM (8/KZN)

78 I believe they got inspiration from Detroit. When the super bowl was here, they put up`awnings and painted up the plywood covering the windows to make the buildings appear occupied. This was done along the entire route of the so called "People Mover" .....the downtown monorail. I always thought they needed cardboard people with waving arm action like that Bob Newhart movie.

Posted by: Warlord 1958 at March 03, 2010 12:17 PM (JX4tV)

79 This is an old idea -- Beloit Wi did this 20 years ago to give the impression that the town wasn't going down the crapper.

"Beloit, the only city whose name sounds like a quarter dropped in a toilet."

Posted by: LifeTrek at March 03, 2010 01:19 PM (ykFmN)

80 kids supra shoes

Posted by: Supra Vaider Black Grey Low at March 27, 2010 09:11 AM (YmevG)

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