June 11, 2010
— Ace Before you watch the clip, recall the standard sitcom joke you've heard a thousand times, which basically consists of a character swearing up and down to be innocent of some allegation, only to follow it up with a parenthetical admission that confirms the charge.
The old:
"I did not take the cookies from the cookie jar. Now, did I look at the cookie jar? Sure. Did I think about taking the cookies? Of course. Did I actually take the cookies from the cookie jar? Again: yes. But I did not take the cookies from the cookie jar."
It's a hack joke, but, as they say, it's a classic for a reason.
The whore proves her chops as a comedian beginning at 1:20.
Ed Morrissey discusses this seriously, which I guess proves he's a lot more disciplined than I am.
Oh, here's my take:
You know how bad it looks when a wife stands by a cheating husband at a press conference?
It looks worse when the genders are reversed. A lot worse. To the point where I pretty much want to give her a pass for adultery -- with this schmuck as her husband, who can blame her?
Oh, I just caught this: Watch the husband's head turn, and his grim expression, as she admits that maybe there was some slight genital-exposure. But just a smidge.
Hooo Boy: The Chicken just said "Free at last, free at last, Thank God A'Mighty, I'm Free at last."
According to court papers obtained by WHAM 13, Corona told police at the time of her arrest, "I know what I did was inappropriate and I apologize, but you'd understand if you knew what my life was like."She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
Posted by: Ace at
10:52 AM
| Comments (238)
Post contains 307 words, total size 3 kb.
I say it's not adultery as long as the husband gets his rocks off when she tells him about it later that night.
And also if she gives him the 20 bucks.
Posted by: Tom Servo at June 11, 2010 10:55 AM (T1boi)
Posted by: koopy at June 11, 2010 11:00 AM (awinc)
Antidote to turn that into an anti-joke:
CUT TO: Character at a another school the audience mistakes for the said school.
Posted by: fb at June 11, 2010 11:00 AM (G60Nl)
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 11:01 AM (pLTLS)
Posted by: Dr. Peter Venkman at June 11, 2010 11:02 AM (4WbTI)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 11, 2010 11:02 AM (UOM48)
Not me. I'd only want to "hit that" with the Blade of Olympus.
Srsly, quit while you're ahead. "His genitalia were exposed by the zipper"?
Loved how the husband turned and looked at her as she was describing the whole genitalia thing.
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:02 AM (9hSKh)
"It'd be like I was sitting on your lap........fully clothed."
........except for the going up and down like a Mexican jumping bean while making and 'O' face part.
Posted by: Blazer at June 11, 2010 11:02 AM (t72+4)
Posted by: steevy at June 11, 2010 11:02 AM (mG4Xb)
A cougar attack?
/Shamelessly stolen from someone yesterday.
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:03 AM (9hSKh)
Posted by: kansas at June 11, 2010 11:03 AM (mka2b)
I see nothing wrong here. I mean what else are park benches for?
Posted by: Jim in San Diego at June 11, 2010 11:03 AM (oIp16)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 11, 2010 11:04 AM (UOM48)
Eh...her husband has one of the douchy CJ pony tails, left over from the 90's...no wonder his wife is out and about given out hand jobs in the park. Don't these guys have any self respect...I'll die a lonely old man before I let a woman embarras me like that.
Posted by: dananjcon at June 11, 2010 11:04 AM (pr+up)
Posted by: Dr. Spank at June 11, 2010 11:04 AM (xO+6C)
Posted by: steevy at June 11, 2010 11:04 AM (mG4Xb)
We live in the age of victims.
I'd be serving her the walking papers and getting the hell out of Dodge.
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:05 AM (9hSKh)
Posted by: lorien1973 at June 11, 2010 11:05 AM (IhQuA)
Posted by: Dr. Spank at June 11, 2010 03:03 PM (xO+6C)
you wouldn't hit it? and you call yourself a Moron.
Posted by: Unclefacts, AoSHQ Professional Debate Team at June 11, 2010 11:06 AM (erIg9)
btw, Ace, if this post would've been 28% funnier if you titled it:
Whores Say The Funniest Things —Art Linkletter
Posted by: fishdicks at June 11, 2010 11:06 AM (uFokq)
And besides, the children at the park all entered this world coming out of their mothers' vagina. Little pervs knew what they saw and they liked it.
Honey, tell the reporters I'm not an adulterer.
Posted by: some whore at June 11, 2010 11:06 AM (G60Nl)
Shear horror for subway riders after scissors stabbing
Posted by: taylork at June 11, 2010 11:07 AM (0Hn5w)
Posted by: Dr. Spank at June 11, 2010 03:03 PM (xO+6C)
you wouldn't hit it? and you
call yourself a Moron.
I never said I wouldn't hit it.
Posted by: Dr. Spank at June 11, 2010 11:07 AM (xO+6C)
the best part was when the cuckold looked away quickly when she started to talk about her fling's penis.
I think he might like to watch, or he's addicted to those big ol titties. Either way, he's a creepy little schmuck
Posted by: s'moron at June 11, 2010 11:08 AM (UaxA0)
btw II,
Anyone who has a problem with this married woman being charged with adultery as thought it's some draconian law...
might I remind that marriage is a legal contract.
Posted by: fishdicks at June 11, 2010 11:08 AM (uFokq)
I read somewhere that she doesn't get any from the husband b/c he's undergoing a sex-change operation. She gave that excuse to the police when she got caught.
Posted by: IreneFingIrene at June 11, 2010 11:08 AM (JKe0g)
Posted by: ErikW at June 11, 2010 11:08 AM (xmv7D)
it is amazing what make-up could do for a woman (see last nights ont) just looking at the perp pic...I'd never hit that crackhead-skank but as she was standing outside the courthouse spinning her tail of whoa...I was starting to second guess myself.
Hmmmm
bunk...
Posted by: dananjcon at June 11, 2010 11:08 AM (pr+up)
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 03:02 PM (9hSKh)
HaHa, just watched it again and caught the hubby's expression when she said that part. I'll bet right then and there at the presser was the first time she mentioned that little tid-bit..
If he would have turned his head any faster to look at her when she said it, it would have made a sonic boom.
Posted by: Blazer at June 11, 2010 11:08 AM (t72+4)
Posted by: Larry Marchant at June 11, 2010 11:09 AM (66DVY)
The husband has a pony tail!
An effin PONYTAIL!
No wonder his wife is hanging out with guys that have malfunctioning zippers that also expose their genitals.
Posted by: Jim in San Diego at June 11, 2010 11:09 AM (oIp16)
Oh yeah, tell me more...
Wait, wait! I was talking about the whore! I'm into girls, trust me.
Posted by: Larry Marchant at June 11, 2010 11:09 AM (9hSKh)
That's like a ten year man card suspension right there. (Unless you take up competitive mixed martial arts or bull riding as a hobby)
Posted by: MikeTheMoose at June 11, 2010 11:09 AM (0q2P7)
Posted by: steevy at June 11, 2010 11:09 AM (mG4Xb)
might I remind that marriage is a legal contract.
Yes, and contract law is governed by civil remedies, not criminal charges.
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 11:10 AM (pLTLS)
wa... wa... was...
not... not...
o... o... on
tha.. that...
pa.. pa.. pa... park
ben...ben...bench
Posted by: The Chicken at June 11, 2010 11:10 AM (C8Pcc)
This is on? Good
I was, for the first time, am speechless!
Sex in public with a woman who is not your wife that does not result in the throwing of rocks and stones and pebbles and such afterwards ... this is too much to think about for now
Posted by: Hadji the Muslim Comic at June 11, 2010 11:10 AM (ruzrP)
Posted by: ace at June 11, 2010 11:10 AM (66DVY)
"Nothing was out there, nothing was showing."
Well, that wiener was hiding somewhere? Stop concealing the Oscar Meyer Wiener Ms. Corona.
Posted by: Fish at June 11, 2010 11:11 AM (v1gw3)
Posted by: Suzanne Corona at June 11, 2010 11:11 AM (awinc)
Posted by: The Chicken at June 11, 2010 11:11 AM (C8Pcc)
I almost feel sorry for Luke Moretti, the reporter, reporting this. Then again, I already knew back in 1984 in communications school (BU) that this would be my fate if I didn't get the hell away from the media (and go to law school)
Posted by: ParisParamus at June 11, 2010 11:11 AM (2/WqP)
Posted by: The Squirrel at June 11, 2010 11:12 AM (IhQuA)
2. Women don;t respect men with pony tails.
3. Her husband has a pony tail.
Ergo...
Posted by: bloop at June 11, 2010 11:12 AM (4nxhP)
Eww! I eat on that table. I also sleep on that table.
Posted by: Homeless guy who was offended
Don't forget that you defecate there too!!
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 11:12 AM (pLTLS)
Well that explains a lot. Not happy with man card suspension this "guy's" going full on renouncing membership.
Posted by: MikeTheMoose at June 11, 2010 11:12 AM (0q2P7)
According to court papers obtained by WHAM 13, Corona told police at the time of her arrest, "I know what I did was inappropriate and I apologize, but you'd understand if you knew what my life was like."
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
Posted by: Z Ryan :| at June 11, 2010 11:13 AM (cMo6P)
I'm all for punishing perverts, but damn, that's a rough bit of "justice" for the crime of getting a cougar-themed hummer in the park.
Posted by: DelD at June 11, 2010 11:13 AM (asikV)
I am calmed down now.
Why is sex in the public park like Mecca?
Everybody stops and faces it
that is good? Yes? no?
No?
Posted by: Hadji the Muslim Comic at June 11, 2010 11:13 AM (ruzrP)
Posted by: Justsam at June 11, 2010 11:13 AM (vueus)
Posted by: ParisParamus at June 11, 2010 11:13 AM (2/WqP)
Yes, and contract law is governed by civil remedies, not criminal
charges.
Is the charge of adultery in this case civil or criminal? Because the police can issue civil complaints, too, e.g., a speeding ticket.
Posted by: fishdicks, do you like them? at June 11, 2010 11:13 AM (uFokq)
I read somewhere that she doesn't get any from the husband b/c he's undergoing a sex-change operation. She gave that excuse to the police when she got caught.
I read that too somewhere.
Posted by: Dr. Spank at June 11, 2010 11:14 AM (xO+6C)
That milky white substance that was dribbling out of the corner of my mouth when the police showed up? We had lunch before hand, ham on rye with plenty of Miracle Whip to be exact.
What, is that a crime too ?
Posted by: Suzanne Corona at June 11, 2010 11:15 AM (t72+4)
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
Posted by: Z Ryan 
at June 11, 2010 03:13 PM (cMo6P)
I wonder if that is even true. How many transgendered men go out and marry women?
Posted by: Jim in San Diego at June 11, 2010 11:15 AM (oIp16)
I don't know whether the secular civil government needs to make adultery a crime, or whether that should be the government's business - but as for however the aggrieved spouse reacts... well, to quote Lorena Bobbitt, that cuts both ways...
Posted by: Keith Arnold at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (Jdtsu)
Posted by: joncelli at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: Joanie (Oven Gloves) at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (HaYO4)
Well, them bodily fluids all dry up anyway, don't they?
Posted by: Homeless guy #2 at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (G60Nl)
Posted by: Generic Troll at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (MMC8r)
Posted by: Z Eric Cartman at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (cMo6P)
Hand Jobs in the Park
The stunning new bio-pic of the countries BIGGEST DIRTY WHORE!!
Starring Susanne Corona
Now playing in a theater near you!
Posted by: dananjcon at June 11, 2010 11:16 AM (pr+up)
Which are only enforceable if a party holding that contract in due course claims injury and demands remediation. In many states, denying sex itself being seen as a violation of that contract.
Posted by: MikeTheMoose at June 11, 2010 11:17 AM (0q2P7)
Going to a park with some sleazy douche and getting it on in front of kids? Then I'd want someone to shoot me in the head.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 11, 2010 11:17 AM (UOM48)
The charges will be dropped immediately because she is moving to Washington to become the Obama's nanny.
Posted by: Fish at June 11, 2010 11:17 AM (v1gw3)
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
Not understanding the specifics of course but couldn't dude go out and get a strap-on or something?
Posted by: ErikW at June 11, 2010 11:17 AM (xmv7D)
Well, them bodily fluids all dry up anyway, don't they?
Wasteful. I keep mine in jars in case I need them later.
Posted by: homelss guy#3 at June 11, 2010 11:18 AM (0Hn5w)
Posted by: gomm at June 11, 2010 11:18 AM (73jUp)
Posted by: Will Folks at June 11, 2010 11:18 AM (66DVY)
You never know what goes on between a married couple. You never know.
They might have an open marriage. Or he is supporting her because they have little kids and he wants to shelter them from a divorce and the fact that their mommy is a whore.
Perhaps he would get more sympathy if he'd cut his hair. Isn't it universally known that having a ponytail automatically makes you a wuss or at the very least a douche?
Posted by: Log Cabin at June 11, 2010 11:19 AM (HSLVJ)
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
I dunno if he's transgender, but that charge is akin to some guy excusing his adultery by saying that his wife was frigid. I don't buy it. May Ace's "whore-wife pimping theory" is correct.
They had to sit out in the open at a crowded public park to get their rocks off?
It is quite sick. However, drawing on my years of Skinemax viewing, I think some people are into that kind of depravity.
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:19 AM (9hSKh)
don't forget that you defecate there too!!
That's what Public Libraries are for...take a look at this picture for me...
Posted by: A.Greene at June 11, 2010 11:19 AM (p8fMa)
Posted by: Will Folks at June 11, 2010 11:19 AM (66DVY)
Heh. I graduated from BU in '89 (CLA, not COM). We might have crossed paths.
Posted by: Farmer Joe at June 11, 2010 11:19 AM (z4es9)
Posted by: Drew in MO at June 11, 2010 11:20 AM (kDbNj)
But they (the state) then are the holders in due course of the contract where you agreed not to speed; Your drivers license. So yes their representative can go ahead and plop a ticket in your lap and demand monetary remediation.
Posted by: MikeTheMoose at June 11, 2010 11:20 AM (0q2P7)
Posted by: MAJ O at June 11, 2010 11:21 AM (Hz5Gk)
I remember when Nikki Haley used to put on one and let me be the woman. MAGIC! I'd scream, "Mommy! Don't let Will Folks daddy catch us doing this!"
Posted by: Larry Marchant at June 11, 2010 11:21 AM (IhQuA)
Posted by: Jim in San Diego at June 11, 2010 11:21 AM (oIp16)
If they've "never had sex", I'd think not. But that's assuming the whore is telling the truth.
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:21 AM (9hSKh)
Is the pony-tail part of the sex-op? Y'know.. like an acclimatization/preparation thing. 'Cause you know who else has one?
Posted by: IreneFingIrene at June 11, 2010 11:21 AM (JKe0g)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at June 11, 2010 11:21 AM (UOM48)
Suzanne Corona is related to the Corona family of beer fame in Mexico, and this matter will be dismissed in favor of political correctness and dual border unity. "Conservatives should just butt out of our business", said Department of State guru Sir Edmund Hillary Rodham Clinton, namesake of Sir Edmund Hillary of Mt. Everest fame.
Posted by: Fish at June 11, 2010 11:22 AM (v1gw3)
Saturday in the park
I think it was the Fourth of July
...
People reaching, people touching
A real celebration
Waiting for us all
If we want it, really want it
Can you dig it (yes, I can)
And I've been waiting such a long time
Posted by: Dr. Varno at June 11, 2010 11:23 AM (QMtmy)
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
I'm on the case, or Job as it were...
Posted by: Larry Merchant at June 11, 2010 11:23 AM (p8fMa)
Posted by: gomm at June 11, 2010 11:23 AM (7JES6)
Posted by: Drew in MO at June 11, 2010 11:24 AM (kDbNj)
Posted by: Z Ryan at June 11, 2010 11:24 AM (cMo6P)
Posted by: Justin "i'm hung like a horse really i am don't listen to her insinuations" Amend at June 11, 2010 11:24 AM (awinc)
The last time I screwed a chick on a picnic table a got a splinter in my ass. The chick got a whole tree in hers.
Posted by: Will Folks at June 11, 2010 11:25 AM (t72+4)
* buzzcut/shave,
* Mike Pence style,
* long, but tied back.
Anything else is in silky pony territory. Requires "styling" and combing. Fzck that shit.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 11:25 AM (9b6FB)
Posted by: nevergiveup at June 11, 2010 11:25 AM (U5btG)
Posted by: kawfytawk at June 11, 2010 11:25 AM (lFt0D)
No need for public parks.
Posted by: Dave C at June 11, 2010 03:24 PM (qmecx)
You sick puppy!
Posted by: Jim in San Diego at June 11, 2010 11:25 AM (oIp16)
Posted by: Z Ryan at June 11, 2010 11:26 AM (cMo6P)
While you are doing 'research' on the Craigslist for whatever locality this is, Ace, you might want to hit the 'Haiti Relief' Hotlink in the sidebar and give to those poor Haitians.
After all ,"The Tradgedy in Haiti is Teeerible...".
The floods and oil spill, not so much.
Posted by: Michelle Obama at June 11, 2010 11:26 AM (p8fMa)
My personal cut is the same Bible which says spouses should should be faithful, also says spouses should give it up often enough to keep a curb on those sexual "needs" and if voluntary dry spells regularly extend into months or so in length because one spouse is just not giving it up, (involuntary separation job/military service excluded) that spouse no longer can have a valid expectation that the other not seek sexual contact elsewhere.
Posted by: MikeTheMoose at June 11, 2010 11:26 AM (0q2P7)
Hey all I had in my mouth was the tip! What's the big deal right? I mean....it's not like I was sucking on it or something - it was just kinda in my mouth n' stuff.
Posted by: Suzanne Corona at June 11, 2010 11:27 AM (DaGWx)
I lived in a seedy neighborhood in school where sex in the park was just Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sunday daytime fun.
Never a shortage of exposed wang. That's for damn sure.
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 11:27 AM (pLTLS)
Posted by: Z Ryan at June 11, 2010 11:28 AM (cMo6P)
Posted by: nevergiveup at June 11, 2010 11:28 AM (U5btG)
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex."
Suzanne's just intimidated by the ponytail fag about using her dick.
Posted by: Fish at June 11, 2010 11:28 AM (v1gw3)
Wouldn't it have been better to have sex on one of those little bouncy things on springs that go back and forth at the park instead? Hell, those things practically do all of the work for you.
Not that I would know of course.
Posted by: Blazer at June 11, 2010 11:29 AM (t72+4)
They NEVER had SEX ?? So, why get married? More importantly, where did the kids she refers to come from? Immaculate deception.......
If she NEVER had sex, why is she settling for giving the guy a Clinton in a park?
Posted by: SantaRosaStan, faux comedian at June 11, 2010 11:32 AM (JrRME)
Anyone know how I can get this chicks cell number or e-mail addy ? She seems like my type of gal.
Posted by: John Edwards at June 11, 2010 11:32 AM (t72+4)
Yup. But in these days, "till death do us part" has been redefined too often to "until I grow tired of you" or " 'till something else better comes along".
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:33 AM (9hSKh)
Isn't it universally known that having a ponytail automatically makes you a wuss or at the very least a douche?
Yes, the they are automatically a douche. And, also, guys who wear tank-tops...automatic douche.
And/or wear sandals.
And/or eat ice cream from a cone.
Posted by: fishdicks, do you like them? at June 11, 2010 11:34 AM (uFokq)
She's obviously saving herself for the right man.
Posted by: damian at June 11, 2010 11:35 AM (4WbTI)
Posted by: Sponge at June 11, 2010 11:35 AM (UK9cE)
OT: Nebraska confirms it's applying for membership in Big 10
How big of a deal is it here in Nebraska? The local stations covered the Regents meeting live.
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at June 11, 2010 11:36 AM (P33XN)
Unless the kids are from artificial insemination or adoption, they aren't "his" kids.
Celibate marriages do exist (John Wesley had one IIRC) btw.
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010 11:37 AM (9hSKh)
I was just going to post with the question: what number post does Will Folks show up.
I guess number 1 - something tells me the Will Folks meme is gonna outlive Charles Gibson, B+ and possibly the Chicken.
Posted by: Mallamutt, Chairman of the Committee to Elect Greene/Cohen 2012
Pikers all.
Posted by: Toby The Beagle at June 11, 2010 11:37 AM (Vol3D)
Yes, the they are automatically a douche. And, also, guys who wear tank-tops...automatic douche.
But I have a mullett so that's cool, right?
Who wants to party?
Posted by: "Alive With Pleasure" Mullett Guy at June 11, 2010 11:37 AM (xmv7D)
Posted by: zombie John Lennon at June 11, 2010 11:37 AM (YVZlY)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at June 11, 2010 11:37 AM (aG/Y/)
OT: Nebraska confirms it's applying for membership in Big 10
How big of a deal is it here in Nebraska? The local stations covered the Regents meeting live.
Posted by: Dack ThrombosisThat sounds like a big fucking deal.
Posted by: The Joe from Scranton at June 11, 2010 11:39 AM (Vol3D)
Wifebeaters are not tank tops.
Actually they are all the same trashtastic apparel no-nos.
Just.Don't.Do.It.
EVER
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 11:39 AM (pLTLS)
I don't buy the hubby is transgendered at all, especially if they have kids. She just threw that out there to the cops hoping they'd let her off. Hubby is probably a beta type that lets her walk all over him and she probably fed him a line of shit before the presser about her version of events, which probably went:
"It was just harmless kissing in the park with some guy I met by chance, honey,... its over, .....first time it ever happened,...... it'll never happen again, I promise"
His expression in the clip above when she mentioned the guys genitalia is classic. He didn't see that coming at all.
Posted by: Blazer at June 11, 2010 11:40 AM (t72+4)
Posted by: Kratos (missing from the side of Mt Olympus) at June 11, 2010
03:37 PM (9hSKh)
Amen !! These two look like they'll get the "Protestant Faithful of the Year" award-
or did you mean John Wesley Hardin ?
Posted by: SantaRosaStan, faux comedian at June 11, 2010 11:42 AM (JrRME)
What's the big deal, I've had a Corona in a park many times.
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at June 11, 2010 03:37 PM (aG/Y/)
heh, good one.
Posted by: Blazer at June 11, 2010 11:42 AM (t72+4)
Especially silky pony haircuts, and jimmy fallon haircuts, and combovers.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 11:42 AM (9b6FB)
Posted by: Sharkman at June 11, 2010 11:44 AM (Zj8fM)
Bikers, too.
Ever see Rolling Thunder ride by?
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 11:44 AM (9b6FB)
her calling the husband a victim is funny. She totally fails to realize it was her conduct that makes it so.
Plus she called him a ladyboy when she was arrested. ha.
Posted by: California Red at June 11, 2010 11:45 AM (7hPHX)
Which was is he/she/it going? Ying or Yang??
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 11:49 AM (GEzm1)
I see what you did there.
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 11:51 AM (GEzm1)
Yea, I wonder what ever happened behind that.
Posted by: Blazer at June 11, 2010 11:51 AM (t72+4)
Ever hear of Trace Adkins?
Do you in fact, even know any rednecks?
I'm beginning to think the Moronoshpere has been infiltrated by the ghey mafia.
No tank tops?
What next, Cowboy boots? Beer?
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 11:52 AM (9b6FB)
So this guy is going female? I think that is a simpler operation. Remember Renee Richards? Now Obama care pays.
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 11:55 AM (GEzm1)
Posted by: Sponge at June 11, 2010 11:55 AM (UK9cE)
Posted by: Jean at June 11, 2010 11:55 AM (h0rZ/)
might I remind that marriage is a legal contract.
Yes, and contract law is governed by civil remedies, not criminal charges.
Posted by: laceyunderalls
Even when she brings home a disease that kills him. Adultery was a criminal charge because the marriage contract isn't the same as a partnership between two businessmen. Until antibiotics, it could mean a death sentence for the partner. And with the rise of herpes, we're back to 'you've got it for life'. And with AIDs, we're back to ' this can and probably will kill you'.
Posted by: Blue Hen at June 11, 2010 11:56 AM (R2fpr)
Posted by: Dr. Peter Venkman at June 11, 2010 03:02 PM (4WbTI)
As it turns out, that may be literally true.
Posted by: theCork at June 11, 2010 11:56 AM (zL5Q1)
Isn't it universally known that having a ponytail automatically makes you a wuss or at the very least a douche?
And/or wear sandals.
And/or eat ice cream from a cone.
Posted by: fishdicks, do you like them? at June 11, 2010 03:34 PM
(uFokq)
Wow! Three for three!
Old guy living in Florida with a white hair ponytail and sandals who also eats ice cream.
PS - Also combat veteran who wears Bruno Magli's and listens to Skynard.
Posted by: Fish at June 11, 2010 11:56 AM (v1gw3)
Speaking of which the election commission certified the results today. From the Charleston paper:
The state Election Commission certified the results of TuesdayÂ’s primary, including declaring Alvin Greene the winner of the Democratic race for U.S. Senate, Friday afternoon.
The meeting in Columbia lasted only 15 minutes and no one appeared on behalf of any of the candidates or campaigns.
Though Greene was declared the winner, second-place finisher Vic Rawl has until Monday at noon to file a protest of the election with the S.C. Democratic Party.
The Dems have a tougher row to hoe now.
Posted by: Vic at June 11, 2010 11:56 AM (6taRI)
My nephew let me cut his off and give him a buzz. Then, because he found haircuts too much trouble--like working, he grew it back. Sweet guy but he looks like a douchbag.
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 11:57 AM (GEzm1)
Maybe. Fine.
There are no exceptions to the silky pony thing, though.
Douchebags, all.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 11:58 AM (9b6FB)
Public sex in front of kids. Fuck that. Not cool.
Posted by: Warden at June 11, 2010 11:59 AM (fE6tn)
And/or eat ice cream from a cone.
Posted by: fishdicks, do you like them
Because real men stick their head into the ice cream tub at the park/carnival.
Posted by: Blue Hen at June 11, 2010 11:59 AM (R2fpr)
Posted by: Sponge at June 11, 2010 12:00 PM (UK9cE)
The Dems have a tougher row to hoe now.
Posted by: Vic
You answered your own question.
P.S. He said hoe. heh.
Posted by: Blue Hen at June 11, 2010 12:01 PM (R2fpr)
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 12:01 PM (GEzm1)
Even when she brings home a disease that kills him.
the fuck?
Did that happen here?
Stoopid ass argument
(no offense, but seriously stoopid)
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 12:02 PM (pLTLS)
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:02 PM (9b6FB)
Would have walked away with a black eye if it was me.
Of course, I'd have thanked him for his service.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:04 PM (9b6FB)
Posted by: gus at June 11, 2010 12:04 PM (Vqruj)
You can think of my hair as a constant Gadsden flag.
It's trouble you don't want.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:05 PM (9b6FB)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at June 11, 2010 12:05 PM (i3AsK)
Officer: Get off his lap, you two are under arrest.
Dirty Whore: But, we were just necking, Officer!
Officer: You sir, put your neck back in your pants and come downtown with me.
Posted by: Speller at June 11, 2010 12:06 PM (o0R2E)
No, I'm anti-ponytail on a guy or whatever he calls himself. I'm pro-gun, pro bible and pro-cling. A good redneck wouldn't want to look like a woman
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 12:06 PM (GEzm1)
Posted by: Squatch at June 11, 2010 12:06 PM (+/6so)
Posted by: USA at June 11, 2010 12:07 PM (YZISw)
Don't be closet redneck then. Get out a little more.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:09 PM (9b6FB)
Posted by: USA at June 11, 2010 12:09 PM (YZISw)
Posted by: GhostShip at June 11, 2010 12:10 PM (4VxpQ)
Of course, I'd have thanked him for his service.
Navy guy was 3 times his size, wasn't effeminate, had been good to the kid even though he really didn't deserve it--had trouble getting to work on time. Hitting him at a black-tie gala in an upscale hotel ballroom would have been really stupid. He laughed it off which was the right thing to do. The boss could have just waited till monday morning and made him cut if off since there were professional dress requirements--which did not include rat tails.
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 12:10 PM (GEzm1)
Did I remember to mention beer?
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:14 PM (9b6FB)
And did anyone notice that she has a piercing on her lower lip.
By her mouth, you perverted morons. Odds that she has a BeDazzler(tm)?
Posted by: Penfold at June 11, 2010 12:15 PM (1PeEC)
Posted by: dagny at June 11, 2010 12:16 PM (GEzm1)
I'm not dumb enough to start anything, and I'm not unmindful of tactics. But I have my limits, like any Libery-loving male.
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:17 PM (9b6FB)
206 Then I guess you're okay with prosecuting a whole lot of people in the US on the *off-chance* *someday* *maybe* down the road they'll contract Hep. C or another disease because their spouse had an affair.
What an smart way to spend tax-payer dollars!
Posted by: laceyunderalls at June 11, 2010 12:17 PM (pLTLS)
Posted by: USA at June 11, 2010 12:19 PM (YZISw)
Charles Johnson and "The New Castrati" may or may not have long hair. It's about who they are.
For example: Putting an anchor tattoo on my arm would never make me a person you'd trust not to fzck up a ship at sea. But in the same vein, giving a carpenter's belt to a guy fresh from the sea doesn't mean he's gonna make it through his first construction job without learning a thing or six.
There's a helluva lot of us in Liberty-land that look more like Trace Adkins or the Rolling Thunder guys than CJ and co.
Dagny, you are actually one of my favorite posters here, so I'll stop yankin' your chain! And I gotta go!
Posted by: K~Bob at June 11, 2010 12:26 PM (9b6FB)
Posted by: CraigC at June 11, 2010 12:34 PM (W3eeb)
Posted by: Zombie Terry Kath at June 11, 2010 12:41 PM (8g9qq)
Or we like telling the p.c. RINO atheist crowd at HA to fuck off by giving the "wrong" answer on purpose to piss them off.
Posted by: andycanuck at June 11, 2010 12:56 PM (7b1Uc)
What an smart way to spend tax-payer dollars!
Posted by: laceyunderalls
No. Are you thrilled with the idea of the survivors taking Mom to small claims court to pay for funeral expenses? One of the points of marriage was a monogomus sexual relationship. Violating that before the age of antibiotics meant the possibility of transmitting something that you would have for life and which would probably be fatal. The period of time when the consequences of adultery diminished can be measured from the time antibiotics became available, until herpes and then AIDs appeared. Please note that I am not referring to condoms, since the practices of married couples vary between chemical, pills, barriers, condoms, or often nothing. Especially since one partner hasn't a freaking clue as to the need. The consequences are again dire. The social stigmata is out of synchronization with the consequnces. The same holds true for single parentage.
Is criminalization the answer? I do not know. Is sneering at this the appropriate response for sexual activity we think to be reckless when conducted by a teenager, when an unknowing partner may be at isk?
Posted by: Blue Hen at June 11, 2010 01:01 PM (R2fpr)
Insanity is coming to a city near you.
Posted by: curious at June 11, 2010 01:04 PM (p302b)
About one year old you say? Nevermind.
Posted by: MarkD at June 11, 2010 01:08 PM (YhZfg)
I don't think it was a hand job. From what the cops are saying, she was sitting on his lap and he was throwing the lumber to her. Either way, whipping your junk out in public usually gets you in trouble.
Posted by: MrCaniac at June 11, 2010 01:08 PM (Vol3D)
Posted by: CraigC at June 11, 2010 01:20 PM (W3eeb)
Posted by: andycanuck at June 11, 2010 01:22 PM (7b1Uc)
Bikers, too.
------------------
Well, pony-tailed bikers are the fuck-the-world loud-pipes Harley crowd, and as South Park correctly pointed out, they're total fucking fags.
And the 'Nam vets who sport the (literal) horse's ass tend to be the slobs who show up at memorial services in denim or leather vests and other biker slob apparel. So while I respect their service, their sartorial choices make them look like disrespectful fucking slob fags, too.
JMO, so ream me out all you want.
Posted by: schizuki at June 11, 2010 01:29 PM (Xd9fe)
Posted by: MrCaniac at June 11, 2010 01:38 PM (Vol3D)
205 The see-saw can be kinda interesting too.
But only in the dark of night when nobody's around and not in an adulterous way -- that's just wrong.
Not that I would know anything about that.
Posted by: unknown jane, humanities major, Cubs fan at June 11, 2010 01:39 PM (5/yRG)
She told officers her husband is "transgender," and that the two "never had sex." never had "sex".
FIFY
Posted by: JohnJ at June 11, 2010 01:42 PM (/K0XR)
Ponytails on guys?
Depends upon the guy and the ponytail. Most of the time, imho, they don't work -- but some guys can pull off the ponytail (then they're fun to play with...the ponytails that is).
Posted by: unknown jane, humanities major, Cubs fan at June 11, 2010 01:43 PM (5/yRG)
Posted by: mikeyslaw at June 11, 2010 01:54 PM (QMGr1)
Posted by: Ted Kennedy's Gristle Encased Head at June 11, 2010 01:57 PM (+lsX1)
Posted by: cackfinger at June 11, 2010 02:59 PM (TUBcJ)
Oh, God... I didn't realize you were talking about THAT. That's my local news station! They've been talking about that for a couple of days 'round here.
Now it's all over the country? (Or all over the planet?) Oh, geez...
I guess maybe I should have have expected that, but I didn't. Ewwww.
Posted by: Optimizer at June 11, 2010 03:44 PM (acVo8)
Posted by: rakmjn1 at June 11, 2010 03:47 PM (WTqaX)
Posted by: Optimizer at June 11, 2010 03:56 PM (acVo8)
Posted by: ace at June 11, 2010 04:00 PM (66DVY)
Oh, and the "trangendered" idea may go back to a big fuss they had in Batavia a few years ago, when an Earth Science teacher there revealed that he was transgendered, and was going to undergo a sex change. The most bizarre thing about that, however, was that I actually knew the guy (casually, not well).
[No, I'm not making this up, BTW.]
Posted by: Optimizer at June 11, 2010 04:03 PM (acVo8)
WIVB-TV reporter George Richert is a buddy of mine. I'm bummed he didn't get assigned this story. Although the reporter they used has a great Buffalo accent.
Posted by: schizuki at June 11, 2010 04:29 PM (Xd9fe)
And transgender can mean a few things. He might have been a woman who transitioned to a man before they even met, in which case, it would back up her "never had sex" claim; she could be meaning "never had 'real' sex," though you could split hairs all night over the definition. (And yes, there are operations for adding guy bits--phalloplasty, mainly. Still imperfect, and the results are kinda . . . iffy.) Or, more likely in my opinion, he could be a guy who's now deciding he wants to transition to female and she's not taking it too well. Which is kind of understandable.
But fucking a guy on a park bench when kids are around . . . yeah, no. Lost my sympathy there, Susie.
Posted by: Tungsten Monk at June 11, 2010 05:01 PM (5jbMr)
Notice the tempature at the time of the incident. It tells the whole story
Posted by: bill at June 11, 2010 05:23 PM (dmL5a)
Posted by: sexypig at June 11, 2010 06:44 PM (wUFyh)
I doubt if it takes longer than for someone to pack their bags.
Posted by: Rose at June 11, 2010 10:40 PM (BYsJS)
Posted by: CoolCzech at June 12, 2010 06:08 AM (tJjm/)
Posted by: mtananda at June 12, 2010 10:18 AM (vgKxW)
Posted by: Scarpe Nike at September 20, 2010 05:49 PM (zCrPq)
Posted by: abigale at October 18, 2010 12:18 AM (OHD1n)
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Posted by: Will Folks at June 11, 2010 10:53 AM (IhQuA)