Ace of Spades HQ

October 05, 2010

Why I'm Voting Democrat
— Ace

Funny meme over at Twitter, thought maybe people would want to try it.

"B/c I don't remember when I was whining like a little bitch back when unemployment was 5.6% under Bush." -- Diggbiii

"Because telling stories about my gay friend makes me feel good about myself." -- JennQPublic

"Because I gotta dance!"-- Jenny Erikson

Bad Blogger Again: Yeah but I have a reason. I moved. Yeah, moved. To a place I do not like. But I needed a place, so here I am.

And it's just wonderful, because it's only for a month, which means I have to do all this again in 27 days.

BTW, if you notice I wasn't around a lot at night. Wasn't out getting drunk most of the time. Was mostly looking at one bad apartment after another.

So I gave up, and now I'm in this place.

Posted by: Ace at 02:23 PM | Comments (235)
Post contains 152 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Damn. You're gonna be busy killing the hoboes at your shelter to keep them from stealing your stuff.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:25 PM (7AOgy)

2 that twitter link did not work for me

Posted by: gesc at October 05, 2010 02:25 PM (HMLVZ)

3 I'm voting Democrat because I want you all to be as miserable as I am.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at October 05, 2010 02:26 PM (Vz9lf)

This place? Is it...

institutional?

Posted by: Cicero at October 05, 2010 02:27 PM (QKKT0)

5 You should get a tiny home.

Posted by: Serious Doggy at October 05, 2010 02:28 PM (bAySe)

6 I'm voting Democrat because I stand on the shoulders of giants like Joe Biden. Also, the bitchin' logo.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at October 05, 2010 02:29 PM (rNJC9)

7 And their new logo. I was powerless to resist their new logo.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at October 05, 2010 02:29 PM (Vz9lf)

8 In not unrelated news, I was looking up Val-U-Rite display cases at TJMaxx, and there is an entire section for purses called "Hobos." They are large and baggy, all the better, I assume, for toting about the hacked remains.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:29 PM (cRAJa)

9 I'm voting Democrat because I because I'm one miserable, disliked, desperate motherfucker who is unable to run my own life but feel I have the expertise to run yours.

Posted by: Dr Spank at October 05, 2010 02:30 PM (OdSjh)

10 I'm voting Democrat because I'd rather vote than work.

Posted by: WalrusRex at October 05, 2010 02:30 PM (xxgag)

11 Don't have twitter, don't want it.

Posted by: Vic at October 05, 2010 02:30 PM (/jbAw)

12
4 week 'voluntary' psychiatric eval?

Posted by: Dang Straights at October 05, 2010 02:31 PM (fx8sm)

13 I'm voting democrat cuz of issues and shit.

Posted by: Typical Californian at October 05, 2010 02:31 PM (OdSjh)

14 Because they LIKE Sharia...

Posted by: Achmed, the not yet dead Terrorist at October 05, 2010 02:32 PM (AdK6a)

15 So where'd ya move this time?

I'm voting Democrat because its racist not to.

Posted by: Iblis at October 05, 2010 02:32 PM (9221z)

16 "But I needed a place, so here I am."

Picked up bedbugs from hobo "souvenirs" at the old place?

Posted by: Bartender at October 05, 2010 02:32 PM (/0IOT)

17 My sympathies on the move. It blows. Of course, you're a lot younger than I am. Trust me, it gets much worse as you get older.

The difference is that I'm sitting in a 3600 sq ft house overlooking a lovely canyon and you're probably in a 600 sq ft shoebox walk up apartment in the Big City.

Posted by: Y-not sitting in a rental house in Utah while half her shit's in CA at October 05, 2010 02:33 PM (osFsP)

18 Because someone registered me Democrat?

Posted by: Achmed the Dead Terrorist at October 05, 2010 02:33 PM (AdK6a)

19 i'm voting democrat because i got really, really wasted last night. oops, wrong thread.

Posted by: cali grump at October 05, 2010 02:33 PM (hL0k8)

20 "Was mostly looking at one bad apartment after another."

empty freight cars are too down market?

Posted by: newrouter at October 05, 2010 02:33 PM (3V3F5)

21 don't have twitter, can't help, but I hope you guys keep it up. "because I've been dead for 20 years and the city of Chicago won't let me go."

Posted by: joeindc44 at October 05, 2010 02:33 PM (QxSug)

22 I am voting Democrat because it allows me to feel superior while at the same time speaking down to my Hispanic gardener.

Posted by: Drew in Mo at October 05, 2010 02:33 PM (6tLfV)

23 "because I believe 30 bumper stickers on my Prius isn't a cry for help."

Posted by: joeindc44 at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (QxSug)

24 I'm voting democrat because continued democrat majorities will mean that Obama would be less likely to get reelected in 2012.

Posted by: pity t. fool at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (BjQSh)

25 Because we are finally winning?

Posted by: Joseph Stalin at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (AdK6a)

26 I am voting Democrat because I am the first drop of menstrual blood that will be the swamped sanitary napkin of a Democrat surge in November.

Posted by: Faisal Shahzad at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (oLT/p)

27 "because WalMart is the greatest threat to my SWPL values out there."

Posted by: joeindc44 at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (QxSug)

28 In not unrelated news, I was looking up Val-U-Rite display cases at TJMaxx, and there is an entire section for purses called "Hobos." They are large and baggy, all the better, I assume, for toting about the hacked remains.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 06:29 PM (cRAJa)

Hmm. Hadn't thought of it that way. I always figured they were MADE out of hobos.

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (Rwudm)

29 speaking of moving...
ATTENTION GULF COAST MORONS:

I'm new to Mobile, AL, and just discovered that Colt and I will be here a while. We're looking for a new play group-- at least some folks to sweetly dip and take advantage of celebrate with on Election Night. Hit me up at fillyatacehqATgmailDOTcom.

No fatties commies.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (cRAJa)

30 Too many damned process-servers at all hours with the old place?

Posted by: cthulhu at October 05, 2010 02:34 PM (/0IOT)

31 "I'm a government employee, can't get job elsewhere"

Posted by: joeindc44 at October 05, 2010 02:35 PM (QxSug)

32 Because Wallstreet is making to much money off the recent spike in pudding futures.

Posted by: PugBoo at October 05, 2010 02:35 PM (kZVsz)

33 I'm voting Democrat for a carton of cigarettes and $20.

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:35 PM (Rwudm)

34 Who knew a good Ewok hovel would be so hard to find?

Posted by: You seem to move a lot - are you in some kind of trouble? at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (8/DeP)

35 So I gave up, and now I'm in this place.
The shower schedule is up in the main hall. I hope 7:15 a.m. isn't too early for you.

Posted by: ace's flop house at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (oLT/p)

36 "I'm a GM UAW union thug, and people won't buy our cars without government cash"

Posted by: joeindc44 at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (QxSug)

37 I'm voting Democrat because I really have no say in the matter.

Posted by: A Corpse in Cook County at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (s/p3G)

38 "because shopping at Whole Foods makes me better than you"

Posted by: joeindc44 at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (QxSug)

39 You can stay at our place, ace.
Just take it easy on the wife's fart box.
She's gotta work.

Posted by: sifty at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (gxC8L)

40 I'm voting democrat cuz the democrats "get me".

Posted by: Khalid sheikh Mohammed at October 05, 2010 02:36 PM (OdSjh)

41 Because I can't think of any reason why I would vote for a Republican

Posted by: Harry Reid's Ideal Hispanic Voter at October 05, 2010 02:37 PM (Fz4bB)

42 I'm voting Democrat because I'm just sick and tired of all this liberty.

Posted by: Madame Defarge at October 05, 2010 02:37 PM (8/DeP)

43 I'm voting Democrat because Nancy P. gives me a huuuuugh hard on. So does Barky.

Posted by: JDC from Las Vegas at October 05, 2010 02:37 PM (lPu+Z)

44 Vic, you don't need twitter to read the tweets.

Posted by: t-bird at October 05, 2010 02:37 PM (FcR7P)

45 Posted by: Y-not sitting in a rental house in Utah while half her shit's in CA

Try 99% of ALL shit in DC while self is in Mobile, especially while sick and chilled and wanting a blankie but the only thing available is nnnnnnnnnaaaasty rental house bed coverlet with upsetting stains.

Finally caved and bought a second casserole dish last week. It's over.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:37 PM (cRAJa)

46 I'm voting Democrat because working was such a drag.

Posted by: t-bird at October 05, 2010 02:38 PM (FcR7P)

47 I'm voting Democrat because I see no irony in attacking a for profit medical industry while at the same time working in it.

Posted by: Drew in Mo at October 05, 2010 02:38 PM (6tLfV)

48 There was a unicorn involved .

Posted by: The Creepy Ewok at October 05, 2010 02:38 PM (XDeui)

49 I'm voting Democrat because I can see Obama's dick from my backyard.

Posted by: chrissie matthews at October 05, 2010 02:38 PM (oLT/p)

50 I'm voting Democrat because Republicans want to steal my uterus & shave my mustache.

Posted by: Joanie (Oven Gloves) at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (wd0Iq)

51 I'm voting Democrat for the oldest reason in the book: I was paid to do so.

Posted by: Street Walker at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (8/DeP)

52 But Ace, the good thing is, this keeps you from pack-ratting. Colt and I have been on the move since 2005, and it's cut our crap by a good 20% each year. After a while, you just don't care, and you start calling the silver-tinted plastic forks "the formal place setting."

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (cRAJa)

53 Nanny Nancy says Voting Democrat lets me follow my dreams of being a shitty musician or shitty poet.

Posted by: sifty at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (gxC8L)

54 I'm voting Democrat because passing bills to find out what's in them sounds like a competent methodology for producing legislation.

Posted by: A Corpse in Cook County at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (s/p3G)

55 O/T: drudge headline:
"OBAMA-CLINTON TICKET 'ON THE TABLE'"

Posted by: curious at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (p302b)

56 Try 99% of ALL shit in DC while self is in Mobile, especially while sick and chilled and wanting a blankie but the only thing available is nnnnnnnnnaaaasty rental house bed coverlet with upsetting stains.

Gaahhh. I HATE that...I have a phobia or something, can't even stand to stay in a hotel room unless I throw the bedspread off the bed, bring my own pillows and sleep fully clothed.

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (Rwudm)

57 I'm voting democrat because my mom dropped acid when she was pregnant with me. That and the "dropping me on my head" incident.

Posted by: Dr Spank at October 05, 2010 02:39 PM (OdSjh)

58 Hateful effing sock .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at October 05, 2010 02:40 PM (XDeui)

59 Because convicted felons can only vote for Democrats?

Posted by: MrScribbler at October 05, 2010 02:40 PM (Ulu3i)

60 You can always stay at the YMCA, young man Ewok.

Posted by: a dancing Indian at October 05, 2010 02:40 PM (oLT/p)

61 I am voting democrat because that is how all of my ballots are filled out for me.

Posted by: sTevo at October 05, 2010 02:40 PM (VMcEw)

62 I'm voting Dem because of Janeane Garafolo and her smokin' cockroach tattoos. 'Nuff said.

Posted by: ErikW at October 05, 2010 02:41 PM (E/3QM)

63 wanting a blankie but the only thing available is nnnnnnnnnaaaasty rental house bed coverlet with upsetting stains

That sucks!

We did the air mattress thing for a couple of weeks. Not. Good. But at least our covers were clean.

Finally caved and bought a second casserole dish last week. It's over.
Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 06:37 PM

It's funny about the casserole dish. I forgot a couple of small things (intentionally left a bunch of others) including my contact lens supply, some "fancy" shampoo, and - get this - a paper towel holder. And I refuse to buy another paper towel holder. It's probably a $5 item at Wal-Mart, but I am living without it out of some twisted principle.

Posted by: Y-not at October 05, 2010 02:42 PM (osFsP)

64 Like Obama / Clinton is supposed to make me any more likely to vote Democrat than Obama / Biden? Macaca, please.

Posted by: Are these people for real? at October 05, 2010 02:42 PM (8/DeP)

65 I'm voting Democrat because they're the only ones who appreciate my giant papier mache puppet-making skillz.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:42 PM (N4z77)

66 I'm voting Dem because I'm just damn tired of picking up after myself.

Posted by: Dem protester at October 05, 2010 02:42 PM (0K3p3)

I liked this one:

"Because only the razor sharp wit of Joe Biden can save us now."

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at October 05, 2010 02:43 PM (Yq+qN)

68 I'm voting Democrat because John Cusack has pretty eyes.

Posted by: Joanie (Oven Gloves) at October 05, 2010 02:43 PM (wd0Iq)

69 A woman with hairy pits said she would give me a hand job if i voted Democrat.

Posted by: sifty at October 05, 2010 02:43 PM (gxC8L)

70 I'm voting democrat because of three little words: Head injury.

Posted by: huerfano at October 05, 2010 02:43 PM (No0N3)

71 link for the hillary headline.....

looks like sheer panic to me...

Posted by: curious at October 05, 2010 02:43 PM (p302b)

72 I'm voting Democrat because I like my insurance and the main Democrat said that if I like my insurance plan, I can keep my insurance plan.

Posted by: The Q at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (pfStM)

73 55 - fairytale but if it happened I don't think they would win.

Posted by: gesc at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (HMLVZ)

I'm voting Democrat because I think President Boooooooooosh needs to be impeached!

Posted by: ChuckOH at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (Fz4bB)

75 I'm voting Democrat because I don't trust Republicans to keep us safe from the Jew menace.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (N4z77)

76 I'm voting Democrat because a "Great American" named Average Joe convinced me that it was all just too worthless to vote for anyone else.

Posted by: The Great Satan's Ghost at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (a71k6)

77 I'm voting Democrat because its the only way I'll get past the Black Panthers at the entrance to the polling place.

Posted by: Cicero at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (QKKT0)

78 I'm voting Democrat because the voices have promised to stop if I do.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:44 PM (7AOgy)

79 60 You can always stay at the YMCA, young man Ewok.

Posted by: a dancing Indian at October 05, 2010 06:40 PM (oLT/p)

But he'd have to share his... puddin...

Posted by: Police...man? at October 05, 2010 02:45 PM (AdK6a)

80 Waaaay o/t, but...my brand new baby granddaughter is coming home from the hospital tonight!!!

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:45 PM (Rwudm)

81 Good God, you're not living in my crawlspace are you?

Posted by: Gail at October 05, 2010 02:45 PM (f46PC)

82 It's probably a $5 item at Wal-Mart, but I am living without it out of some twisted principle.

Colt's holdout is a toaster. Mine is a decent deskchair. We all have our Rubicons.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:45 PM (cRAJa)

83 I'm voting Democrat because I'm hoping Andy will reward me with one of Aunt Bea's prize-winning pickles.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:45 PM (7AOgy)

84 I'm voting democrat because I like donkeys better than elephants.

I'm voting democrat because some actor/dancer/singer/comedian does and I want to be cool.

I'm voting democrat because I get free cigs and booze and a ride to the polls.

I'm voting democrat because "two black men are standing in front of the polling place with clubs" and I'm a scared, racist white chick.

Posted by: TheresaD at October 05, 2010 02:46 PM (4nY0K)

85 I'm voting Democrat because I'm a corpse, and all of us corpses traditionally trend strongly in favor of Democrats.

Posted by: A Corpse at October 05, 2010 02:46 PM (QKKT0)

86 I'm voting Democrat just to stop that creepy Ewok from stalking me.

Posted by: Marco Rubio at October 05, 2010 02:46 PM (pfStM)

87 I'm voting Democrat because I'd rather be outside the barbed wire than inside the barbed wire with you people.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:46 PM (N4z77)

88 Waaaay o/t, but...my brand new baby granddaughter is coming home from the hospital tonight!!!

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 06:45 PM (Rwudm)

Mazel tov!

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:46 PM (7AOgy)

89 I'm voting Democrat because John Cusack has pretty eyes. Posted by: Joanie (Oven Gloves) at October 05, 2010 06:43 PM

You're right. Wow, you can see them much better now that his hairline has retreated so far.

Posted by: huerfano at October 05, 2010 02:46 PM (No0N3)

90 @80
Congrats!

Posted by: Y-not at October 05, 2010 02:47 PM (osFsP)

91 Waaaay o/t, but...my brand new baby granddaughter is coming home from the hospital tonight!!!

Nooooooooooooo, sweet baby granddaughters are NEVER o/t

Congratulations.

Oh, and the very first thing I do upon entering a hotel room is hurl the comforter to the floor, never touch it again, and wash hands in 1000 degree water. Current bedbug outbreak FTW.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:47 PM (cRAJa)

92 I can't imagine the logistics of an Obama-Clinton ticket - she's not gonna take a back seat to anyone, and he's not gonna take orders from a Clinton. So...which one would be the "man" in this relationship?????

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:47 PM (Rwudm)

93 I'm voting Democrat because I want to burden my children with insurmountable debt. And I no longer want to have to shave my legs and/or bathe. Oh yeah, and Birkenstocks are the bomb, babies!

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at October 05, 2010 02:47 PM (HjxoE)

94 But he'd have to share his... puddin...
No, that's in the naveee.

Posted by: Semen, er, Seaman at October 05, 2010 02:47 PM (oLT/p)

95
#80, wonderful! Congratulations to you and your family!

Posted by: TheresaD at October 05, 2010 02:48 PM (4nY0K)

I'm voting Dem because Grandma is in hospice and can't get Avastin anymore.

Which is good because the old battleaxe wasn't leaving me shit anyway.

Posted by: ErikW at October 05, 2010 02:48 PM (E/3QM)

97 i'm voting democrat because a bad job market gives me an excuse toblaze. *cough*

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at October 05, 2010 02:49 PM (1MdBO)

98 I'm voting Democrat because I want to keep getting invited over by my enlightened Progressive neighbors. They have the best dinner parties.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:49 PM (7AOgy)

99 I'm voting Democrat to score with the naked PETA chicks.

Posted by: Cicero at October 05, 2010 02:49 PM (QKKT0)

100 I'm voting Democrat because if my testicles haven't dropped by now, I guess they never will.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:49 PM (N4z77)

101 Thanks, y'all!! We've been keeping #1 Grandson while his mom has been in the hospital (son in law is in Afghanistan), and he is SOOOOOO ready for his momma to come home!!

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:49 PM (Rwudm)

102 Waaaay o/t, but...my brand new baby granddaughter is coming home from the hospital tonight!!!
Is she registered, yet?

Posted by: ACORN member at October 05, 2010 02:50 PM (oLT/p)

103 Voting Democrat because math is racist!

Posted by: sifty at October 05, 2010 02:50 PM (gxC8L)

104 I mean is she registered a dozen times, yet?

Posted by: ACORN member at October 05, 2010 02:50 PM (oLT/p)

105 One of the sites linked to yesterday's Daily Telegraph article: 'The "World's smallest apartment" on sale in Rome'

Â£43,000, Ace, and it's yours! LINK

Posted by: mrp at October 05, 2010 02:50 PM (HjPtV)

106 I'm voting Democrat because it seems like the best way to hasten the End Time.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:50 PM (7AOgy)

107 wanting a blankie but the only thing available is nnnnnnnnnaaaasty rental house bed coverlet with upsetting stains Never, ever, ever leave the house without your poncho liner.

Posted by: XBradTC at October 05, 2010 02:50 PM (X0Ona)

108 I mean is she registered a dozen times, yet?

Posted by: ACORN member at October 05, 2010 06:50 PM (oLT/p)

Nope. She's holdin' out for a pony.

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:51 PM (Rwudm)

109 They have the best dinner parties.
Me too!

Posted by: david frump at October 05, 2010 02:51 PM (oLT/p)

110 I'm voting Democrat because I'm expecting Obama to break out his stash of Obama cash any minute now, and I need a new kitchen.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:52 PM (7AOgy)

111 I'm voting Democrat because I don't wanna have to worry about paying my mortgage, I don't wanna have to worry about puttin gas in my car... - if I take care of them, they're gonna take care of me.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:53 PM (N4z77)

112 i'm voting democrat because olbermann fought death...and won!

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at October 05, 2010 02:53 PM (1MdBO)

113 I'm voting Democrat because they let me vote more than once! And under any name I like! Awesome!

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at October 05, 2010 02:54 PM (HjxoE)

114 I'm voting Democrat because I don't know how to drive stick.

Posted by: A Corpse in Cook County at October 05, 2010 02:54 PM (s/p3G)

115 82 It's probably a $5 item at Wal-Mart, but I am living without it out of some twisted principle.

And bringing these two vital topics together, Colt bought me a two-pack of fleece blankets at Wal-Mart on clearance because the comforter scared me. He knew the bitching would be endless if he didn't. Last night we turned the A/C and I was still cold, and he said, "Go get one of our $6 blankets."

Opening the POD when we bring it down here is going to be interesting. I'm not even precisely sure what's in it any more. I hope the bodies have kept.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:55 PM (cRAJa)

116 i'm voting democrat because raykon iis so logical and calm

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at October 05, 2010 02:56 PM (1MdBO)

117 iowahawk brings it:

@iowahawkblog: #WhyImVotingDemocrat because I'm really liking what they did with Detroit.

Posted by: Waterhouse at October 05, 2010 02:56 PM (s/p3G)

118 I'm voting Democrat because "Muslims on Mars" is catchy and a legitimate goal of this Administration!

Posted by: ErikW at October 05, 2010 02:56 PM (E/3QM)

119 Why I'm voting Democrat? Two things: Democrat chicks! and because I have a grudge against my penis, but mostly because I have a grudge against my penis.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:56 PM (N4z77)

120 I'm voting Democrat to keep from having to watch poor fellows like Matthews, Olbermann and Schultz get all weepy on Election Night (and for the next 60 days afterward).

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 02:57 PM (7AOgy)

121 Opening the POD when we bring it down here is going to be interesting. I'm not even precisely sure what's in it any more. I hope the bodies have kept.

You'll know waaaay before you open it...I do hope you remembered to use dry ice???

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:57 PM (Rwudm)

122 I'm voting democrat because I have problems with my short-term . . .Democrat because. . . something.

Posted by: Gail at October 05, 2010 02:57 PM (f46PC)

123 I'm voting for whoever Satan tells me to vote for. What a half-eaten goat?

Posted by: Joanie (Oven Gloves) at October 05, 2010 02:57 PM (wd0Iq)

124 And bringing these two vital topics together, Colt bought me a two-pack of fleece blankets at Wal-Mart on clearance because the comforter scared me. He knew the bitching would be endless if he didn't. Last night we turned the A/C and I was still cold, and he said, "Go get one of our $6 blankets."

It's Wal-de-mart for your Harry Potter Democrats.

Posted by: Chairman LMAO at October 05, 2010 02:57 PM (9eDbm)

125 I vote Democrat because it's my way of helping the unfortunate without having to donate to charity or otherwise associate with those people on that side of town.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at October 05, 2010 02:58 PM (plsiE)

126 I'm voting Democrat because antisocialist's offspring punished him with a pooping baby.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 02:58 PM (cRAJa)

127 @TheEspersen: #WhyImVotingDemocrat To end the failed Bush policies of the past 2 years.

Posted by: Waterhouse at October 05, 2010 02:59 PM (s/p3G)

128 I'm voting Democrat because MAATT. DA-MONN.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 05, 2010 02:59 PM (N4z77)

129 #WhyImVotingDemocrat because it is easier than doning "the vest".

Posted by: bomber at October 05, 2010 02:59 PM (VMcEw)

130 I'm voting Democrat because antisocialist's offspring punished him with a pooping baby.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 06:58 PM (cRAJa)

I hear ya! (Except I'm a "her")

Posted by: antisocialist at October 05, 2010 02:59 PM (Rwudm)

131

"Apparently because they're the party of witch-burners"

Posted by: Judge Hathorne at October 05, 2010 03:00 PM (Fz4bB)

132 Yo soy communisto! Si se pueda!

Posted by: Undocumented Guest Voter at October 05, 2010 03:00 PM (xy9wk)

133 Apartments? Move way the hell out, not like your chained to desk 9 to 5!

Posted by: Jean at October 05, 2010 03:02 PM (OJHxW)

134 I'm voting Democrat because I'm so much better off now than I was four years ago... wait... four years ago my house was worth 25 percent more than it is now... and I hadn't been out of work for an extended period of time... hmmm... never mind.

Posted by: stuiec at October 05, 2010 03:02 PM (7AOgy)

135

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 06:58 PM (cRAJa)

I hear ya! (Except I'm a "her")

Oh, sorry. Well that's even worse, because since YOU'RE the woman the baby is going to punish you EVEN MORE.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 03:02 PM (cRAJa)

136 someone who might have taken this meme seriously actually put "because I don't want this nation run by hillbillies"

Posted by: ChuckOH at October 05, 2010 03:04 PM (Fz4bB)

137 I'm voting Democrat because I hate the big evil corporations that made the iPhone, Mac, Jeep, Birkenstocks, Sony HDTV, and Coke Zero that I love and can't live without.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at October 05, 2010 03:05 PM (plsiE)

138 I'm voting Democrat because the Iraq.

Posted by: Miss South Carolina at October 05, 2010 03:07 PM (VXBR1)

139 I'm voting Democrat to spite that awful stoopid snowbilly who doesn't give two shits what I think anyway.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 03:08 PM (cRAJa)

140 I'm voting Democrat because the "Coexist" bumper sticker just brings the whole thing together, doesn't it?

Posted by: ErikW at October 05, 2010 03:08 PM (E/3QM)

141 I'm voting Demonrat because I really like to vote, and they'll let me vote, like, 5 or 6 times.

I'm voting Demonrat because D comes like way earlier in the alphabet

Posted by: RightThinker at October 05, 2010 03:09 PM (KmHbv)

142 I'm voting Democrat because the Pepsi logo is like the Obama one!!!

Posted by: shit for brains at October 05, 2010 03:13 PM (oLT/p)

143 I'm voting Democrat because I'm an ahtist and I'm sensitive as shit.

Posted by: Yoko Ono at October 05, 2010 03:13 PM (VXBR1)

144 I'm voting democrat because it makes me smarter. And smug. But mostly smug.

Posted by: mpurinTexas (kicking Mexico's ass since 1836) at October 05, 2010 03:13 PM (xMKKV)

145 CaptKirk01 Because I am against predatory tonsillectomies

Posted by: Holdfast at October 05, 2010 03:14 PM (Gzb30)

146 I'm voting democrat so all the nuclear reactors and coal fired will be shut down.

Posted by: sTevo at October 05, 2010 03:15 PM (VMcEw)

147 curious- Hillary is just as guilty with Obamacare, it was always her dream, now it will be their nightmare.

Posted by: politicalmuse at October 05, 2010 03:15 PM (kLKnf)

148 Because Republicans can't get their pant's crease to break properly

Posted by: Jean at October 05, 2010 03:15 PM (OJHxW)

149 So I gave up, and now I'm in this place.

C'mon. Your mom's basement can't be that bad.

Posted by: mpurinTexas (kicking Mexico's ass since 1836) at October 05, 2010 03:15 PM (xMKKV)

150 I'm voting Democrat 'cause Michelle's such a frumious bandersnatch.

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell at October 05, 2010 03:17 PM (VXBR1)

151 I'm voting Democrat to keep Barney Frank in Washington and out of Massachusetts.

Posted by: Barney Frank's boyfriend at October 05, 2010 03:18 PM (pfStM)

152 I'm voting Democrat because Democrats' housing policies are so solid that Ace will surely find a permament place soon.

Posted by: The Q at October 05, 2010 03:19 PM (pfStM)

153

I'm voting Democrat because I like the way President Obama drives.

His car in the ditch AND his ball off the tee.

Posted by: The Q at October 05, 2010 03:20 PM (pfStM)

154 I'm voting Democrat so I can be openly racist.

Posted by: David2.0 at October 05, 2010 03:25 PM (GLofP)

155 I'm voting Democrat because Lady Gaga said to, and she is a political genius, as are all people proficient with AutoTune.

Posted by: Filly at October 05, 2010 03:25 PM (cRAJa)

156 I'm voting Democrat because SEIU thugs broke my legs the last time I voted republican.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at October 05, 2010 03:31 PM (7+1TU)

157 Ouch.

The Leftards are trying to Moby the thing and failing like rats in a septic tank.

Posted by: Garbonzo the Garrulous at October 05, 2010 03:31 PM (23kaI)

158

I'm voting Democrat because they're not afraid to go bareback.

Posted by: RAWMUSCLGLUTES at October 05, 2010 03:32 PM (lGFXF)

159 Made the mistake of reading the whyimvotingrepublican tweets.

Ugh. They appear to hate us as much as we hate them.

I'm calling off the peace.

Posted by: sifty at October 05, 2010 03:33 PM (gxC8L)

160 I'm voting Democrat because, darn it, those Iranians deserve nuclear power just like everyone else, and President Obama get's that.

Posted by: Daisy Dipshit at October 05, 2010 03:34 PM (GLofP)

161 IP = 123.13.237.67

Posted by: spammer at October 05, 2010 03:35 PM (LbqhX)

162 Larry the Cable Guy's place is for sale in Florida. In this economy, you might be able to swing a sweet rental deal. Plus, it looks like a Man Cave (as a woman, ugh).

Posted by: Jane D'oh at October 05, 2010 03:37 PM (UOM48)

163

I'm voting Democrat because Mom and Dad are stupid Republicans who didn't get me a pony when I was growing up.

Posted by: Hoplite Housewife at October 05, 2010 03:39 PM (+a+pw)

164

BTW, if you notice I wasn't around a lot at night. Wasn't out getting drunk most of the time. Was mostly looking at one bad apartment after another.

Ace, I thought you lived with your mum?

Posted by: Titus Quinctius Cincinnatus at October 05, 2010 03:40 PM (PHloB)

165 Plus, it looks like a Man Cave (as a woman, ugh).
Posted by: Jane D'oh

Prurient jokes aside, there must have been some female equivalent for the Gent Den. Like a room for watching Oprah or Bunco parties (no idea, something on James Lileks's blog.)

Posted by: Garbonzo the Garrulous at October 05, 2010 03:40 PM (23kaI)

166
Never, ever, ever leave the house without your poncho liner.

Poncho liner?

Oh, you mean....your woobie.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at October 05, 2010 03:42 PM (P9+0W)

167 I'm voting Democrat cause I'm so-o-o-o-o stoned. Dude.

Did I forget to say Dude?

Dude.

Posted by: Reiver at October 05, 2010 03:43 PM (oBAOc)

168 It's called the kitchen, Garbonzo.

Posted by: andycanuck at October 05, 2010 03:44 PM (oLT/p)

169 I'm voting Democrat because they are the party that doesn't cling to their sky-god and boom-sticks.

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at October 05, 2010 03:44 PM (HjxoE)

170 I'm voting Democrat because I need the government to tell me what kind of light bulb to buy.

Posted by: Reiver at October 05, 2010 03:46 PM (oBAOc)

171 It's called the kitchen, Garbonzo.
Posted by: andycanuck

Yeah ... I just realized that was an invitation to Hunt's Can o' Worms. Sorry, not my intent.

Posted by: Garbonzo the Garrulous at October 05, 2010 03:48 PM (23kaI)

172 I'm voting Democrat because abortion on demand is a civil right.......and guys don't always remember to pack a condom on ladies night down at Sausage Factory(my gave watering hole).

Posted by: Daisy Dipshit at October 05, 2010 03:51 PM (GLofP)

173 I'm voting Democrat because I want my children to have the freedom to denounce me if I should speak against the Party in my sleep.

Posted by: Mr Parsons at October 05, 2010 03:52 PM (OCRaO)

174 What is truly beautiful about that is the serious responses are just as funny as the sarcastic ones.

Posted by: jakeman at October 05, 2010 03:52 PM (POByM)

175 I'm voting Democrat because they're for education. The teachers' unions told me so.

Posted by: Reiver at October 05, 2010 03:52 PM (oBAOc)

176 I'm voting democrat because they don't punch down. fuckity fuck fuck fuck to you evil republicans.

Posted by: scumguy at October 05, 2010 03:53 PM (3k6GF)

177 I'm voting Democrat because they were the party of Lincoln.

Posted by: Public School Graduate at October 05, 2010 03:54 PM (oBAOc)

178 Ace, come to Williamsburg. It's one short stop in from Manhattan.. The rents are cheaper, more space, and you're not really giving anything up to be here. It's a cool neighborhood with lots of great food.

Posted by: L train at October 05, 2010 04:00 PM (KUSbc)

179 Oh, and I get 50Mbs up/down with Verizon out here. DO EEET

Posted by: L train at October 05, 2010 04:02 PM (KUSbc)

180 Would you consider moving to NH Ace? I have a great rental I am painting now.. drive to Boston or Manchester to fly in and out...no state tax, no sales tax.. PJ O'Rouke loves it here...5 minutes from the ocean. 95 3 minutes away...1 acre lot..very private duplex in old barn. Seriously...why not? you will meet everybody running in 2012...and a short drive to Scott Brown.

Posted by: ford at October 05, 2010 04:07 PM (Ki7fm)

181 I'm voting Democrat because I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.

Posted by: Moe at October 05, 2010 04:07 PM (cmiaE)

182 Posted by: Moe

Heh, but your sock is slipping, Bart.

Posted by: Garbonzo the Garrulous at October 05, 2010 04:09 PM (23kaI)

183 I'm voting Democrat because the armed man outside said so.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:24 PM (ENRGu)

184 I'm voting Democrat because I love my country and can't wait to change everything about it.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:25 PM (ENRGu)

185 I'm voting Democrat because the free school lunches for my kids let me sleep in an extra 15 minutes.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:25 PM (ENRGu)

186 I'm voting Democrat because sometimes you just want to do the wrong thing.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:26 PM (ENRGu)

187 I'm voting Democrat because I am jealous of the rich and too lazy to do anything else about it.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:27 PM (ENRGu)

188 I'm voting Democrat because Republican ballots don't get counted in my district. :-P
/sarc
//I think

Posted by: Mary in LA at October 05, 2010 04:27 PM (NGf/6)

189 im voting Democrat cuz Sara Pailin is sooooooooooo icky

Posted by: California Moonbat at October 05, 2010 04:28 PM (NGf/6)

190 I'm voting Democrat because because no one else will vote straight Socialist with me.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:28 PM (ENRGu)

191 I'm voting Democrat because it's so fascinating to see what other people will decide to do with my money.

Posted by: Mindy at October 05, 2010 04:28 PM (6LDQk)

192 I bote Democrat porque they tell me so.

Posted by: Illegal Alien at October 05, 2010 04:28 PM (NGf/6)

193 I'm voting Democrat because the R's hate masturbation.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:29 PM (ENRGu)

194 I'm voting Democrat because I pay no taxes.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:29 PM (ENRGu)

195 I'm voting Democrat because a worm ate my brain and now forces me to do self destructive things in order that it may feast on my rotting flesh and continue its cycle of reproduction.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:30 PM (ENRGu)

196 I'm voting Democrat because my doctor stole my tonsils and my foot and sold them. For money.

Posted by: Mary in LA at October 05, 2010 04:30 PM (NGf/6)

197 I... vote... Dem... cuz... BRAAAAAAINS!!!

Posted by: Zombie at October 05, 2010 04:31 PM (NGf/6)

198 I'm overwhelming the thread because I vote Democrat.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:31 PM (ENRGu)

199 I'm voting Democrat because the interpreter said push that button there.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:32 PM (ENRGu)

200

Bad Blogger Again: Yeah but I have a reason. I moved. Yeah, moved. To a place I do not like. But I needed a place, so here I am.

Sounds like someone is having girlfriend problems again...

Posted by: ed at October 05, 2010 04:33 PM (Zsqn4)

201 By the way the Dems are overwhelming Christine O'Donnell's facebook comments with trolling. It would be cool if the Ace group sent over some Comment Commandos to kick butt. Alternately, they could troll Coons.

Posted by: Kidney at October 05, 2010 04:34 PM (ENRGu)

202 I'm voting Democrat because too lazy, stupid, dishonest or unlucky to have any money, and I want yours.

Posted by: Secundus at October 05, 2010 04:43 PM (Fs256)

203 I'm voting democrat so the world will like us again.

Posted by: pitythefool at October 05, 2010 04:44 PM (ocFLu)

204 I'm voting Democrat because the Republicans hate the poor people that the Democrats keep poor.

Posted by: nickless at October 05, 2010 04:45 PM (MMC8r)

205 I'm voting Democrat because that's what Jesus would do.

Posted by: Mindy at October 05, 2010 04:45 PM (6LDQk)

206 I plan to vote democrat this year because I'm now heavily invested in gold.

Posted by: pitythefool at October 05, 2010 04:50 PM (ocFLu)

207 214 Heh, heh. Dickie is a creationist.

Posted by: Mindy at October 05, 2010 05:06 PM (6LDQk)

208 I'm voting democrat because they have the best bumper stickers.

Posted by: Mindy at October 05, 2010 05:07 PM (6LDQk)

209 I'm voting democrat because nobody will take care of me if i go off the plantation.

Posted by: befuddled at October 05, 2010 05:10 PM (xJU23)

210 I am voting democrat because you can win even if you get less votes.

Posted by: polynikes at October 05, 2010 05:12 PM (iCoSo)

211 I'm voting democrat because I are a public school teacher, which means I have no marketable skills.

Besides, its for the childrens.

Posted by: That lunatic in the 4th grade at October 05, 2010 05:18 PM (UL/HQ)

212 I'm voting Democrat because guys with small dicks need to stick up for each other.

Posted by: HiHo at October 05, 2010 05:18 PM (PiJOz)

213 Because gays, pregnant women, Mexicans and Muslims can't vote in this country, damn you! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU AND YOUR PENIS! I HAVE MY PRIDE! _sob

Posted by: HiHo at October 05, 2010 05:26 PM (PiJOz)

214 I'm voting democrat instead of republican because of alphabetical order--duh. Also, taking pictures of myself naked in the voting booth smoking a joint is going to be another winning idea.

Posted by: befuddled at October 05, 2010 05:26 PM (xJU23)

215 I'm voting democrat because they pay me for every vote i cast.

Posted by: befuddled at October 05, 2010 05:32 PM (xJU23)

216 I'm voting Democrat because they make the homeless feel good about themselves by giving them new shopping carts.

Posted by: Lt.Kilgore at October 05, 2010 05:35 PM (FIDMq)

217 I am voting Democrat to get laid by fat chicks. 2012 can't get here fast enough.

Posted by: befuddled at October 05, 2010 05:39 PM (xJU23)

218 I'm voting Democrat because creationists keep trying to steal my precious bodily fluids.

Posted by: Chaz. Johnson, Esq. at October 05, 2010 05:44 PM (cekJT)

219 Iowahawk wins:

"Because I really like what they did with Detroit"

Posted by: Griff at October 05, 2010 05:48 PM (g+iBz)

220 Note how many of the actual Democrat Twits actually parrot each other.

Posted by: g at October 05, 2010 05:52 PM (2I0rN)

221 The crazy thing is that I'm starting to not be able to tell the difference between the sarcastic ones and the real ones on that tag. My favorite is probably "I can't manage my own life, but feel superior enough to tell you how to run yours".

Posted by: Adlib at October 05, 2010 05:55 PM (nbXq4)

222 Huh, I wonder if this is a response to this: http://imvotingteaparty.com/

I was furious at my friend for that garbage.

Posted by: Anonymous at October 05, 2010 06:02 PM (Tx/hF)

223 230 One of those designs says "Obama won't let me hunt the homeless for sport. That's why I'm voting Tea Party." Whoever runs that site is on to us.

Posted by: Mindy at October 05, 2010 06:08 PM (6LDQk)

224 I'm voting democrat for the free health care.

Posted by: CMU VET at October 05, 2010 06:29 PM (aWPiu)

225 I'm voting democrat because I'm fed up with those on the right who want us to "think" and "use facts" and "accept reality."

Posted by: Warden at October 05, 2010 06:50 PM (bIBBz)

226 I voting Democrat because of their"new reality".

Posted by: ford at October 05, 2010 08:24 PM (Ki7fm)

227 Poor ol' sweetie-pants Ace. I ran my ass ragged every Sat & Sun for 2-1/2 months and then, like a miracle, found the awesomest pad for the awesomest rent. Do not give up. Do not compromise. It's there, you'll find it!

P.S.
I'm voting Dem because, gosh, mean people suck!

Posted by: Peaches at October 05, 2010 08:30 PM (zxpIo)

228 I'm voting d, because I'm dead, and there are five other zombies that voting that way, too...

Posted by: Zombie1 at October 05, 2010 08:50 PM (7uxOY)

229 30 days at Rikers, Ace?

Posted by: joe at October 05, 2010 09:11 PM (ePuY2)

230 I'm voting Dem because, gosh, mean people suck!
Posted by: Peaches at October 06, 2010 12:30 AM (zxpIo)

I'm voting Dem because, gosh, mean people suck! But Democrats swallow... ;-)

Posted by: RightThinker at October 05, 2010 10:01 PM (KmHbv)

231 239 30 days at Rikers, Ace?

Posted by: joe at October 06, 2010 01:11 AM (ePuY2)

http://tinyurl.com/2drktnv

Posted by: RightThinker at October 05, 2010 10:09 PM (KmHbv)

232 I'm voting democrat because of the delta smelts....oh and the children....we've got to save the smelts for the children who'd have never smelt a delta otherwise if we don't vote democrat.

Posted by: Speller at October 05, 2010 11:38 PM (J74Py)

233 I'm voting democrat because I hate all of you and I don't have enough spare time to kill all of you myself.

Posted by: Charlie Manson at October 06, 2010 03:13 AM (6BgmB)

234 I am voting democrat because it's easier than picking tomatoes and I get paid more.

Posted by: stephen colbert at October 06, 2010 03:21 AM (xJU23)

235

I'm voting Democrat because the GOP's cult-like devotion to Sarah Palin creeps me out.

I'm voting Democrat because judging Obama based on his record is racist.

I'm voting Democrat because the teabaggers are just astroturf stooges of the Republican Party elite. I'm also voting Democrat because the teabaggers are also dangerous radicals who are hijacking the Republican Party away from its previous leadership and taking it on a new extreme right wing direction.

Im voting Democrat because Matt Damon saz Im stoopid if I vote Republikan and im not stoopid.

Posted by: Sean P at October 06, 2010 04:44 AM (1b523)

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