August 23, 2011

Caption Contest! - Updated! [ArthurK]
— Open Blogger

NRO's The Corner is having an informal caption/photoshop contest with this picture.

Biden Sumo.jpgA typical entry.

Is anybody else seeing this or is it just me again?

I think, no I KNOW the assembled morons can do better.

The winner will get nothing and like it.

(send photoshops to NRO or put a link in your comment. If there's an insanely brilliant photo-shop cobloggers are invited to hijack this post and insert the 'shop)

------------ Update ------------

The following captions are pretty good. I've looked at them up #190. If I didn't include yours it's because I'm racist.

Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.


Wrestler: Are those chopsticks in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?


Hey Joe, my eyes are up here.


The Immovable Object meets the Irresistible Farce


The fuck you mean you're a Mongolian? You don't look anything like Alex Karras.


Moments later, the complimentary lap dance proved fatal.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 01:43 PM | Comments (241)
Post contains 164 words, total size 1 kb.

1 WTF China has Sumo wrestlers?

Posted by: Vic at August 23, 2011 01:44 PM (M9Ie6)

2 Wow, your girded loins are the best I've ever seen!

Posted by: no good deed at August 23, 2011 01:45 PM (mjR67)

3

Bend over and grab your ankles!

Posted by: Rod at August 23, 2011 01:45 PM (ORbz7)

4 I'm sorry; Are those real?

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Camellia Sinensis Operative at August 23, 2011 01:46 PM (0q2P7)

5 Again?!  Can't you see I'm still hurting from the last time?

Posted by: angler at August 23, 2011 01:47 PM (SwjAj)

6 "Holy shit! Those tits are bigger than Jill's!"

Posted by: Naqamel at August 23, 2011 01:47 PM (UMwMT)

7

Forget the Big Guy;  Count Chinkula back there is about to sink his fangs into your head!

Posted by: Tom Servo at August 23, 2011 01:47 PM (T1boi)

8 You don't really expect me to Assume The Position, do you?

Posted by: That's Mr. Jehovah To You! at August 23, 2011 01:48 PM (QgAFR)

9 I......I......

no words

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 23, 2011 01:48 PM (UOM48)

10 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) is tired beyond tired of the trolls at August 23, 2011 01:48 PM (8y9MW)

11 Now THAT's a big fuckin' deal

Posted by: Andy at August 23, 2011 01:48 PM (5Rurq)

12 Come on let me see ya'. Stand up Hiroshi!

Posted by: Andy at August 23, 2011 01:49 PM (5Rurq)

13 Earthquake explained.

Posted by: toby928™ at August 23, 2011 01:49 PM (GTbGH)

14 It looks like a shot from a Yokozuna vs. Bob Backlund match circa 1993.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at August 23, 2011 01:49 PM (VZ10+)

15 Now, I wholeheartedly agree with China's one child policy.  You people have the biggest babies ever!

Posted by: no good deed at August 23, 2011 01:49 PM (mjR67)

16 "I haven't seen tits like that since I milked a cow in Iowa."

Posted by: kzintius at August 23, 2011 01:49 PM (KbQ5v)

17 #14 is in the lead - so far.

Posted by: Comrade Arthur at August 23, 2011 01:49 PM (+JhHG)

18

Joe, demonstrating martial arts move he calls "killer kung pao."

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at August 23, 2011 01:50 PM (FnRYN)

19 LOOK OUT, MARSHAL LUCKY! IT'S HIGH PRICES!

Posted by: Darth Larry at August 23, 2011 01:50 PM (8sCoq)

20

So, Michelle. 

We meet again?

Posted by: Joltin' Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 01:50 PM (/vjr8)

21 Get ready big boy, I've been training with Michelle Obama

Posted by: JoeNYC at August 23, 2011 01:51 PM (J5JOi)

22 This place is restricted Wang, so don't tell them you're Jewish!

Posted by: nickless at August 23, 2011 01:51 PM (MMC8r)

23 And then I grabbed her like this!  *ow.....my freakin' back*

Posted by: Joey B at August 23, 2011 01:51 PM (UOM48)

24 A Mongolian wrestler on a trip to America is treated to a live interaction at the primate house.  Unfortunately, the primate began throwing feces.

Posted by: pep at August 23, 2011 01:51 PM (6TB1Z)

25 I'm really enjoying your show on Fox, Mr. Beckel.

Posted by: Joltin' Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 01:51 PM (/vjr8)

26 "That's right, the secret to a good shit is in the knees..."

Posted by: thefritz at August 23, 2011 01:51 PM (pH+yu)

27 Let me show you a coupla moves I tried on Michelle....until Bo brought me down.

Posted by: Joey B at August 23, 2011 01:52 PM (UOM48)

28 Thank God we didn't elect Sarah Palin as VP. She would have been such an embarrassment.

Posted by: Johnny (John E.) at August 23, 2011 01:54 PM (nRTou)

29 Ever road the train to DC?  Ever been in a Turkish prison? Ever check the oil?  Come on let's hug it out.

Posted by: Polijay at August 23, 2011 01:54 PM (guvMX)

30 But first you will blow me.

Posted by: The Regular Guy at August 23, 2011 01:54 PM (qHCyt)

31

No eye gouges, No hits below the belt and  No Golden Lasso.

Now go to your corners and come out fightin'.

Posted by: Guy in the hat at August 23, 2011 01:54 PM (/vjr8)

32 You don't live in a food desert, do ya big guy?

Posted by: Joey B at August 23, 2011 01:54 PM (UOM48)

33 I work with a guy who voted for Obama b/c he bought all the "Palin is stupid" jive in '08.

Biden has been an embarrassment as veep from day one.

Posted by: Thea at August 23, 2011 01:55 PM (1mYui)

34

Posted by: nickless at August 23, 2011 05:51 PM (MMC8r)

 

Nice.

Posted by: garrett at August 23, 2011 01:55 PM (/vjr8)

35 Are those special underpants you're wearin'?  Cause I want me some!

Posted by: Joey B at August 23, 2011 01:55 PM (UOM48)

36 "I've shit myself".


That's not an entry, that's what happened.

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 01:56 PM (ljuHV)

37

France has Jerry Lewis. Now China will have an American comic icon:  

Joe Biden

Posted by: fluffy at August 23, 2011 01:56 PM (O6q63)

38 What are you doing in President Obama's special outfit ! Mr. Biden I would like you to meet our famous Michelle Obama impersonator. Buddhas are real people ? Huh!

Posted by: Instant Gator at August 23, 2011 01:56 PM (6N9HR)

39

Wrestler: Are those chopsticks in your pocket or are you just glad to see me.

(look at the, um, crease in Biden's pants)

Posted by: Dallas Mike at August 23, 2011 01:56 PM (hzV1U)

40 So, do they call it "Sumo" wrestling because there's so much more of you?

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) is tired beyond tired of the trolls at August 23, 2011 01:56 PM (8y9MW)

41 My God.  Your titties are bigger than Jill's.

Posted by: Joey B at August 23, 2011 01:57 PM (UOM48)

42 Re dint know rarry david was aperrring.

Posted by: JavaJoe at August 23, 2011 01:57 PM (aATHW)

43 This is all weaksauce.  #11- really? Racial slurs are the best you can do?

Posted by: Verity Kindle at August 23, 2011 01:58 PM (w+qbI)

44

I told you my heterosexuality was going to be tested!

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 01:58 PM (/vjr8)

45 Belloq, having stolen Indy's hat, displays a fattened Short Round to the aging Knight guarding the Holy Grail.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at August 23, 2011 01:58 PM (uhAkr)

46 They finally nail down the Wonder Woman costume, but totally screw up the casting...

Posted by: Lincolntf at August 23, 2011 01:58 PM (uIz80)

47 Damn! That Metamucil is a miracle worker!

Posted by: Glen at August 23, 2011 01:58 PM (0NwXV)

48 I really wish we knew what the 'tard (Biden) said to make the Chinese guy laugh.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 23, 2011 01:58 PM (UOM48)

49 Go morons, go! All I had was: "All wee-wee'd up!" http://tinyurl.com/3ujfzxe

Posted by: m at August 23, 2011 01:59 PM (peKjw)

50 54 This is all weaksauce.  #11- really? Racial slurs are the best you can do?

You have heard about Joe Biden and his racial sensitivity, haven't you?

Posted by: nickless at August 23, 2011 02:00 PM (MMC8r)

51 Already sent one to NRO, earlier.  But, I thought of another:

HERE

Posted by: Damn Dirty RINO at August 23, 2011 02:00 PM (+iwM3)

52 Whoa! I have a feeling we're no longer in a Delaware 7-11 anymore!

Posted by: No Whining at August 23, 2011 02:00 PM (Wqfrr)

53 If I could just get this guy to turn around and bend over I'll feel like I'm back on US soil.

Posted by: Mark at August 23, 2011 02:00 PM (Ou3X1)

54 If I get your underpants, I get to wear them, ok?

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:01 PM (FcR7P)

55 This is why I murder my VP right out of the gate.

Posted by: Rick Fucking Perry at August 23, 2011 02:02 PM (ljuHV)

56 Hey, chop-chop, wanna see my twisted star?

Posted by: angler at August 23, 2011 02:02 PM (SwjAj)

57 And that, my slanty-eyed friend, is what a shart is.

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:02 PM (6TB1Z)

58 Oh yeah, will I've got huge hemorrhoids.

Posted by: Biden My Time at August 23, 2011 02:04 PM (4nfy2)

59 I can't do anything unless Jeff Dunham sticks his hand up my ass.  I'm stuck like this until then.

Posted by: Joe Biden or Walter the Puppet at August 23, 2011 02:04 PM (mjR67)

60 @69
I read this one first and I declare it the thread-winner without bothering to read the others.

Posted by: Y-not at August 23, 2011 02:05 PM (5H6zj)

61 "I think I can take him."

Posted by: Socratease at August 23, 2011 02:06 PM (vaIln)

62 "Look at me! I'm John McCain!  "My friends, my back hurts, and I can't raise my arms.  Build the damn fence!'  Ha! A Fence!  You guys built a WALL.  Ha ha!"

Posted by: angler at August 23, 2011 02:06 PM (SwjAj)

63 Posted by: Verity Kindle at August 23, 2011 05:58 PM (w+qbI)

Someone has not been paying attention to our Vice President's contributions to civilized discourse. 

Posted by: Y-not at August 23, 2011 02:06 PM (5H6zj)

64 67This is why I murder my VP right out of the gate.
Posted by: Rick Fucking Perry at August 23, 2011 06:02 PM (ljuHV)

Not so fast, cholo. 

This will constitute my rebuttal during the veep debates. 

Posted by: Marco Rubio at August 23, 2011 02:06 PM (4hvFT)

65 "I told you you couldn't wipe that dumb look off my face!"

Posted by: Cooter at August 23, 2011 02:07 PM (4RDlt)

66 will = well

Posted by: Biden My Time at August 23, 2011 02:07 PM (4nfy2)

67 "Hmm.  So this is what 'tharn' means."

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) is tired beyond tired of the trolls at August 23, 2011 02:07 PM (8y9MW)

68 We'll settle this the old navy way; The first guy to die, LOSES!

Posted by: nickless at August 23, 2011 02:07 PM (MMC8r)

69 Biden - "Looky everybody! I stared the front of this guy's tube top clean off!"

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at August 23, 2011 02:08 PM (d0Tfm)

Posted by: Rex Harrison's Hat at August 23, 2011 02:08 PM (4136b)

71 Hey Joe, my eyes are up here.

Posted by: Fritz at August 23, 2011 02:09 PM (+KjE2)

72 I agree, #69 is my winnah. 

Posted by: Theresa D., TPT (FREE GGE!!) at August 23, 2011 02:10 PM (Zgfnd)

73 The levity was quickly replaced with horror when it became apparent the Vice President thought these were Klingons, not Chinese people.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at August 23, 2011 02:10 PM (uhAkr)

74 Thought of another one.

Posted by: Damn Dirty RINO at August 23, 2011 02:10 PM (+iwM3)

75 OK, #83 is great, too! 

Posted by: Theresa D., TPT (FREE GGE!!) at August 23, 2011 02:11 PM (Zgfnd)

76 My friend Larry taught me this, it's called the wide stance.

Posted by: Cu'chulainn at August 23, 2011 02:11 PM (iWCMu)

77 "Man, that General Tso's chicken is HOT!"

Posted by: rktkt at August 23, 2011 02:12 PM (zXkiJ)

78 "I love me some Mexicans"

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:12 PM (ljuHV)

79 When they told me to bend over for more national debt, I didn't know they meant this.

Posted by: Biden My Time at August 23, 2011 02:12 PM (4nfy2)

80 And then Bo grabbed me like this and tried to fuck me!  True story!

Posted by: Special Joe at August 23, 2011 02:14 PM (UOM48)

81 Ooh look a super hero !  Can I be your side kick can I be your sidekick!?

Posted by: sonnyspats at August 23, 2011 02:14 PM (I/MzF)

82 "I'll Roshambo you for it..."

Posted by: sunny black at August 23, 2011 02:15 PM (0dyYY)

83 Insert "teabag" or "teabagger" referenc HERE

Posted by: steve at August 23, 2011 02:15 PM (s7ag+)

84 You won't escape that easily, Kim Jong Il!

Posted by: nickless at August 23, 2011 02:15 PM (MMC8r)

85 Veep Loves Jeannie!

Posted by: Lincolntf at August 23, 2011 02:16 PM (hiMsy)

86 Damn - is that a crown or not?  I can't tell if I'm supposed to bow!!!

Posted by: stuiec at August 23, 2011 02:17 PM (ZyH51)

87 Damn Michelle, those look even finer than the purple bike shorts. What ? He's playing another 18? Well let's get busy.

Posted by: Cu'chulainn at August 23, 2011 02:19 PM (iWCMu)

88

"Look, the number one problem facing me here happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: Boobs. B-O-O-B-S, Boobs.  Man boobs.  Fella, he's sure got them.  Man-boobs.  Whoppers! 

Posted by: King Wonderoursful at August 23, 2011 02:22 PM (1vG6v)

89 So if I pull the string, do you turn into a transformer or something?

Posted by: Gregg the Obscure at August 23, 2011 02:22 PM (5tPx9)

90 My eyes are ceramic. Caught a bazooka round at Little Big Horn. Or was it Okinawa? The one without the Indians.

Posted by: nickless at August 23, 2011 02:23 PM (MMC8r)

91

"That guy in thw white shirt is a loser."

"I think you're right Ken."

Posted by: sjff at August 23, 2011 02:23 PM (GMAqR)

92 "I once took a dump bigger than you!"

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:26 PM (iYbLN)

93 CHINESE FOOD!

Posted by: nati at August 23, 2011 02:26 PM (LxMKC)

94 "Hank Johnson was right.  You're so big you'd tip over Guam!"

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:27 PM (iYbLN)

95 Go on!  See if you can make me bow!

Posted by: Dan Collins at August 23, 2011 02:28 PM (zC0XH)

96 "you still want to wrestle me after I just crapped my pants?"

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 23, 2011 02:28 PM (pdRb1)

97 Scranton Joe: "I don't know about you, but when my diapers bunch up, I can scruntch down like this and kinda work the wrinkling out."

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at August 23, 2011 02:28 PM (r4t7/)

98 "You're a big fucking deal!"

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:29 PM (iYbLN)

99 "Usually we only see a man of your girth at the Home Town Buffet."

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:30 PM (iYbLN)

100 I shit bigger'n you, Sonny Jim.  Here, allow me to remonstrate.  Demonstrate.  One of them.

Posted by: Slow Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:30 PM (xy9wk)

101 So are you the kind that won't see me if I just sit still?

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) is tired beyond tired of the trolls at August 23, 2011 02:30 PM (8y9MW)

102 "Rook! A tellolist! Just kiddin', fellas, all in good fun..."

Posted by: Jim Treacher at August 23, 2011 02:32 PM (X3KAb)

103 #75
Did the ninth-degree news junkies know that Biden called somebody "Count Chinkula" ? And darn it all, I just missed it. I have learned so much from y'all tonight. The most important thing I learned is that JOE BIDEN should set the standard of behavior for adults. If he says that that is hunky-dory, well, he's the magical pony prince who basks in the pure strawberry sunshine of The One's presence. "Count Chinkula"  is now officially the language of The New Age. Glorious. Time shall no longer be reckoned in hours, minutes and days but in bidens and fractions of bidens.  God love ya.

Posted by: Verity Kindle at August 23, 2011 02:34 PM (w+qbI)

104 So, there I was, having dinner with Barney Frank, and he leans forward and lets one go on the vinyl. Well, damn, I can do that, so I leaned forward and blew his shit away. Faggot.

Posted by: Chef Mojo at August 23, 2011 02:34 PM (0pvyl)

105 "I think I probably have a much higher IQ than you do, I suspect. I went to law school on a full academic scholarship, the only one in my class to have a full academic scholarship. Â… went back to law school and, in fact, ended up in the top half of my class. I won the international moot court competition. I was the outstanding student in the political science department at the end of my year. I graduated with three degrees from undergraduate school and 165 credits, only needed 123 credits, and I'd be delighted to sit down and compare my IQ to yours, if you'd like, Frank." Is that Frank or Flank? Yuk! Yuk!

Posted by: Joe the Plagiarist at August 23, 2011 02:34 PM (NLDaf)

106 "I'll be the catcher and you be the pitcher!"

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:35 PM (iYbLN)

107 The Immovable Object meets the Irresistible Farce

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at August 23, 2011 02:38 PM (r4t7/)

108 When FDR was on television I was in WWII taking a grenade up my ass just like this.

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:39 PM (iYbLN)

109 "Wow, Anthony Weiner ain't got nothin' on you, big fella."

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at August 23, 2011 02:40 PM (FnRYN)

110

The fuck you mean you're a Mongolian?  You don't look anything like Alex Karras.

Posted by: Slow Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:41 PM (xy9wk)

111

"It's an honor to meet with the head of the National Transitional Council of Libya -- wait, what?"

Posted by: FireHorse at August 23, 2011 02:43 PM (gTGz3)

112 "One child policy my ass! You're at least 5!"

Posted by: Jim Rose at August 23, 2011 02:44 PM (0qEy4)

113 Joe Biden prepares to demonstrate how he single-handedly defeated Hirohito.  With his mind.

Posted by: Marmo at August 23, 2011 02:46 PM (Tm9Vp)

114 Ooops...I crapped my pants!

Posted by: Muddywood at August 23, 2011 02:46 PM (kB2l8)

115

And then, they said I could be Vice President! And they gave me an office! And this HAT!

Hey, where you from? Australia or something?

 

Posted by: Warden at August 23, 2011 02:46 PM (HzhBE)

116 "Resist we much. We must, and we will much, about that be committed. Peace."

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:46 PM (ljuHV)

117 Wealth Redistributor meet your Fat Cat  millionaire. Let's get it on.

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 02:46 PM (xJU23)

118 Hey Wang, do you like gladiator movies

Posted by: Muddywood at August 23, 2011 02:47 PM (kB2l8)

119 "Whatever China wants, China gets.Now off with those sexy panties."

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 02:49 PM (xJU23)

120 7-handicap?...That's better than my boss!

cnredd
Political Wrinkles
http://politicalwrinkles.com

Posted by: cnredd at August 23, 2011 02:50 PM (XdXvF)

121

You know a good movie? Super Troopers.  I love that scene where Rabbit is in Mac's Halloween costume, doing like this, and Officer Smy is yelling through the megaphone "Hey, bear...bear-fucker! Do you require assistance?"

Cracks me up every time.  See, Mt. Foodji, Hu Flung Du over there gets it!

Posted by: Slow Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 02:51 PM (xy9wk)

122 If we do everything right, if we do it with absolute certainty, there's still a 30% chance you are going to kick my ass.

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:51 PM (iYbLN)

123 Son you are a four letter word. B I G.

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:52 PM (iYbLN)

124 Biden says, "I'll be papa and you can be momma." Big guys says, "OK. So, blow me, papa!"

Posted by: John at August 23, 2011 02:53 PM (orMeX)

125 You look nothing like your profile at hot-asian-teen.com, but the taxpayers are paying you, so what the heck.

Posted by: biggestsid at August 23, 2011 02:53 PM (McYq+)

126 The suit and baseball cap combo still draws laughter from all Chinese.

Posted by: endafed at August 23, 2011 02:54 PM (C2VUj)

127 "Alright, Asshole - prepare to be inducted into the Cracked Head Club."

Posted by: S.O.G at August 23, 2011 02:54 PM (VSDhK)

128 " If I rub your tummy do I get a wish? "

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:55 PM (iYbLN)

129 INVISABUL BARNEE FRANK

Posted by: LOLBiden at August 23, 2011 02:55 PM (xy9wk)

130 "is that you curious?"

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at August 23, 2011 02:56 PM (iYbLN)

131 "Best 2 out of 3 for all your T-bills"

Posted by: DaveyNC at August 23, 2011 02:57 PM (7rryi)

132 Moments later, the complimentary lap dance proved fatal.

Posted by: biggestsid at August 23, 2011 02:58 PM (McYq+)

133

"You have fought Lard assess and Fat assess now is time to fight a Jackass, hahahahahaha!"

 

 

Posted by: Jon P at August 23, 2011 02:58 PM (QV6CC)

134

See? Imagine me with red hair, green skin, and lightning shooting out of me.  We'd look just like E. Honda and Blanka!

Posted by: LOLBiden at August 23, 2011 02:58 PM (xy9wk)

135 "HORY SMOKES.. Does it come with kung fu grip too?"

Posted by: UGrev at August 23, 2011 02:59 PM (862vz)

136 "Get ready to join the cracked head club, Hop Sing."

Posted by: Salt Lick at August 23, 2011 02:59 PM (1knKH)

137 You know the worst part? After I kick your fat ass, I'm gonna administer some Obamacare on you.

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:01 PM (1ha9G)

138 "Laugh while you can monkey boy, we OWN your ass."

Posted by: walrus at August 23, 2011 03:01 PM (LG3DR)

139 It's a 32 Belly Option, on 2, on 2.

Posted by: Tommy Bidenboy at August 23, 2011 03:02 PM (xy9wk)

140 "Hey tubby, you been hanging out at the Shake Shack with Michelle?"

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:04 PM (1ha9G)

141 Biden: But you gave Gore a happy ending.

Posted by: biggestsid at August 23, 2011 03:04 PM (McYq+)

142 Before we get going, I gotta know: you ate any Mexican food today?

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:06 PM (1ha9G)

143 I understood it's a *one* child policy.

No seconds.

Posted by: BC at August 23, 2011 03:06 PM (yVRnr)

144 Fear me!  Can you not seen that I am adorned with the skins of the Michelle I vanquished first?  Can you not see that I will be adorned next with your plugs of hair?

Posted by: biggestsid at August 23, 2011 03:07 PM (McYq+)

145

And then to the amazement of all the VP broke into song....

"I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get with you
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But that butt you got makes me so horny
Ooh, Rump-o'-smooth-skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupie
I've seen them dancin'
To hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy butt!
Baby got back!"

 

Posted by: walrus at August 23, 2011 03:09 PM (LG3DR)

146 Biden :

"Michelle?"

*puts on glasses*

"Oops."

Posted by: Dr Spank at August 23, 2011 03:10 PM (ljuHV)

147 You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece! What's your name fat body?

Posted by: Gunnery Sgt. Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 03:11 PM (xy9wk)

148

Really?  Michelle gave you that jacket?

Posted by: wth at August 23, 2011 03:12 PM (wAQA5)

149

Cup check!!!

Posted by: MD at August 23, 2011 03:12 PM (4EQcR)

150 "I'm gonna show you some moves I learned on TV back in the 20's."

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:12 PM (1ha9G)

151 "Can somebody get me the Presidential Kneepads?  I'm just not as flexible as I used to be."

Posted by: OCBill at August 23, 2011 03:16 PM (YJvVE)

152


Er, nice toned arms sweetie. --Biden

The time when Obama knew he had a running mate.




Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 03:17 PM (xJU23)

153 Glamour Magazine's TOP 50 Most Beautiful Women--
#3 Michelle Obama


Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 03:30 PM (xJU23)

154 "Teddy, Teddy, I knew you weren't dead. Great disguise, though, hiding here among the slopes. Tell me, these girls here really have pussies that go sideways?"

Posted by: Sheriff Joe at August 23, 2011 03:30 PM (H6JHE)

155 168 Glamour Magazine's TOP 50 Most Beautiful Women-- #3 Michelle Obama I think I just threw up in my mouth a little!

Posted by: ciceroskip at August 23, 2011 03:32 PM (+Tlj1)

156 Gayer than Twilight

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 03:33 PM (xJU23)

157 168 Glamour Magazine's TOP 50 Most Beautiful Women-- #3 Michelle Obama They must need an Obamacare waiver.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at August 23, 2011 03:35 PM (ZDUD4)

158 "Jobs"
Biden's out there looking for one.

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 03:35 PM (xJU23)

159 "Barack was right. I should have taken the bowing lessons."

Posted by: Stephen Macklin at August 23, 2011 03:35 PM (KGD+C)

160 "Gotta say, for a Chinese guy, you're very clean, neat and articulate."

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:38 PM (1ha9G)

161 170 168 Glamour Magazine's TOP 50 Most Beautiful Women--
#3 Michelle Obama


omg  Beyonce came in #11 and Halle Berry #14.  Moochelle #3?????

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 23, 2011 03:40 PM (UOM48)

162 "Not that it's going to matter here, but what's the AIDS situation like in China?"

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:40 PM (1ha9G)

163 This is a waste of my time, as there are no Pirates in the picture.

Posted by: Pirate Pelf Lucre ƒ¾ at August 23, 2011 03:40 PM (wN82N)

164 befuddled: "Glamour Magazine's TOP 50 Most Beautiful Women -- #3 Michelle Obama"

Glamour's just gone Pravda. No one believes that. I doubt Barack even believes that. When you have to work that hard to sell a lie, well, even the proletariat catches on. It might not be vocal about it, but it can read between the lines.

Let the lame ducking commence.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at August 23, 2011 03:42 PM (r4t7/)

165 Porn Parodies:
Stop this shit now

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 03:42 PM (xJU23)

166 Biden encountered a severe intestinal problem when he tried to act out a pivotal scene from "Big Trouble in Little China".

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at August 23, 2011 03:43 PM (AF1jB)

167 Reading through these really makes me appreciate people that can do humor, and you folks can't.  Holy shit this is some really weak tea.

Posted by: scofflaw at August 23, 2011 03:44 PM (pirrG)

168 "I can see there's no circumcision in China."

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:44 PM (1ha9G)

169 That's pretty good, but look at this one that Larry Craig taught me.

Posted by: joncelli at August 23, 2011 03:45 PM (YL3wr)

170 " Wanna see the paintings in my secret bunker?..."

Posted by: Rondinellamamma at August 23, 2011 03:45 PM (165ZM)

171 "You think you're tough? I'll get my boss on you. He's a black guy!"

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 03:48 PM (1ha9G)

172 scofflaw: "Holy shit this is some really weak tea."

And how much did you pay to be entertained? You'll get nothing and like it, too.

Posted by: Peanut Gallery at August 23, 2011 03:48 PM (r4t7/)

173 "I was at a Korean Brothel once, all the girls looked like you, and there was this one...Sun Lee Kim...she was a giver, a real tender nurturer, clean and well articulated. That's where I learned foreign relations. Seeing you makes me miss that fat gook broad."

Posted by: Sgt. York at August 23, 2011 03:50 PM (gzquD)

174 What do you mean you aren't the shitty wok guy? I'm dying for some flied lice!

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at August 23, 2011 03:53 PM (4Coe2)

175 "I got chunks of guys like you in my stool! Here, let me show you!".

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 03:53 PM (CKKiF)

176 Rise of the Planet of the Apes.

Posted by: toby928™ at August 23, 2011 04:00 PM (GTbGH)

177 "I love what you Chinese guys are frequently up to. Such clever administrating of the people. Keep up the terrific work, guys! The United States has added you to its Facebook page! Seriously, can we have some more money?" - Biden

Posted by: Sgt. York at August 23, 2011 04:00 PM (gzquD)

Posted by: Gregory of Yardale at August 23, 2011 04:04 PM (azHfB)

179 Man, the remake of The Karate Kid really sucks.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at August 23, 2011 04:07 PM (AF1jB)

180 You fool. We said FIGHT, Not Fart!

Posted by: Ali Bama at August 23, 2011 04:08 PM (Xwgt3)

181 In tonight's White House Community Players' production of Bloodsport, the role of Frank Dux will be played by Vice President Joseph Biden. 

Posted by: Voice over the intercom at August 23, 2011 04:15 PM (xy9wk)

182 179 befuddled: "Glamour Magazine's TOP 50 Most Beautiful Women -- #3 Michelle Obama" Glamour's just gone Pravda. No one believes that. I doubt Barack even believes that. When you have to work that hard to sell a lie, well, even the proletariat catches on. It might not be vocal about it, but it can read between the lines. Let the lame ducking commence. Maxim quit trying to push that particular bill of goods about 2-3 years ago. I think they got enough shit from readers for trying to pull a fast one that they knew they couldn't do it again. Glamour going full-on retard just shows how desperate the left is to prop up Camelot II - Electric Boogaloo.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at August 23, 2011 04:16 PM (b8JnP)

183 "You sure are making up for that Japanese One Child policy, aren't ya big fella?"

Posted by: D. Smith at August 23, 2011 04:19 PM (ASk65)

184 #1   Joe Biden to Giant Baby Man: What ya gonna do? Cry? Come on ya big baby, cry! Cry!


#2 I don't think I'll be able to finish all this Chinese food.



Posted by: sifty at August 23, 2011 04:23 PM (mCSGM)

185 Do not taunt Happy Fun Biden.

Posted by: sifty at August 23, 2011 04:24 PM (mCSGM)

186 I am definitely bookmarking this page and sharing it with my friends.

Posted by: Life of Pi Audiobook at August 23, 2011 04:26 PM (2XjDp)

187

Michelle where's your top!

Posted by: Jimmah at August 23, 2011 04:26 PM (NIjD4)

188 Find me my glasses, my mail order bride is finally here!

Posted by: Mr Fever Head at August 23, 2011 04:30 PM (ZgvjV)

189 Holy Shit! Jerry? Jerry Tanaka, is that you? Hey man, how the hell are ya? I haven't seen you since we where soda jerks back at Katie's Diner in Scranton!

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at August 23, 2011 04:33 PM (AF1jB)

190 Later that night after he sobered up, Joe realized that the ceremony was not just the usual tourist crap and his new bride Wee-Gin was indeed legally entitled to fuck him up the ass. It could be worse he mumbled beneath the sobs.

Posted by: Mr Fever Head at August 23, 2011 04:34 PM (ZgvjV)

191 You're just as qualified or more qualified than I am to be vice president of the United States of America. Quite frankly, you might have been a better pick than me.

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 04:34 PM (lHdBc)

192 You think your better than me huh? That's it. It's go time!

Posted by: Jimmah at August 23, 2011 04:34 PM (NIjD4)

193 Showing off his new cap, Vice President Biden little realized the Chinese emblem read "I know where your dog is."

Posted by: Salt Lick at August 23, 2011 04:38 PM (1knKH)

194 I haven't done this sine the 2008 convention. Just, Please let me know before you blow.

Posted by: wsms at August 23, 2011 04:41 PM (4DlNm)

195 Is that an Obamacare waiver in your pocked or are you just happy to see me?

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at August 23, 2011 04:42 PM (AF1jB)

196 Ain't that just like a Chinaman, bringing a sumo wrestler to a gun fight...uh...where's my gun?

Posted by: WTP at August 23, 2011 04:43 PM (4RFKN)

197 Sadly, the winning caption would be whatever Biden actually said.

Posted by: Jimmah at August 23, 2011 04:56 PM (NIjD4)

198 The winner of the 2011 Pulitzer Prize for Best Photograph goes to Charles Portney for his snapshot depicting the final moments of Vice President Joseph Robinette Biden's life.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at August 23, 2011 04:58 PM (AF1jB)

199

Big fella, you look like you could rape all of Nanking by yourself!

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at August 23, 2011 05:00 PM (4hvFT)

200 "Good morning, Mr. Vice President.  I speak perfect English.  And you, Sir, are the assistant stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure."

Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 23, 2011 05:01 PM (mJznp)

201 Sometimes, when you get something you wish for it goes horribly wong.

Posted by: Gmac at August 23, 2011 05:01 PM (wD0Ni)

202 Are you Al Sharpton or Shelia Jackson Lee?  I can never keep you fat, race-baiting whores straight.

Posted by: Plugsy Biden at August 23, 2011 05:06 PM (VxqUc)

203 Ah yes, Biden . . . doesn't it make you proud to be an American?

Posted by: rplat at August 23, 2011 05:07 PM (4vq8i)

204 And the first contestant on "Ow My Balls!"  Joe Biden!

Posted by: grognard at August 23, 2011 05:09 PM (xMJlE)

205 "Rick Perey ain't here but we can have a Texas A&M balls squeeze off! I'm gonna say 'one, two, three, go Aggies!' and the first man to grab and squeeze his opponent's balls gets to gives the Aggie yeller cheer. Comprende?"

Posted by: Apodoca at August 23, 2011 05:10 PM (C4Y9x)

206 "Hold it a sec. I gotta fart."

Posted by: Lance de Boyle at August 23, 2011 05:13 PM (gEs9f)

207 It was all fun and games until Joe jumped up on Wee-jin and latched onto his nose like a pit bull. The Secret Service blamed stress but the whispers about syphilitic dementia continued.

Posted by: Mr Fever Head at August 23, 2011 05:24 PM (ZgvjV)

208 After China buys up all our debt, this is what the new Captain America will look like! This is a big f*cking deal!

Posted by: Joe "Choo Choo" Biden at August 23, 2011 05:38 PM (HjxoE)

209 "Double or nothing on that $1.16 trillion debt we owe you."

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 05:47 PM (4t9J5)

210 "Matt Damon? Sure, he's great. But he takes in the ass like this.....".

Posted by: Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 05:48 PM (4t9J5)

211 Obama is stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at August 23, 2011 05:51 PM (pV6cO)

212

Of course I know what a wedgie contest is.

Posted by: booter at August 23, 2011 06:00 PM (deujC)

213 I was in China but I felt that earthquake in Virginia.Or the guy in the blue underpants farted,either one.

Posted by: Veep Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 06:03 PM (pV6cO)

214 Veep: Yeh, I'm hung, but I only bottom with guys. You big fairy. Smoothbear: Bareback? Veep: Sure! Wanna try some Nairobi Knee-drop first? Smoothbear: Can I get some pics from your CoP? Veep: G-rated only. You know the internet.

Posted by: Thorvald at August 23, 2011 06:13 PM (OhenJ)

215 #182
Yeah, well, when you comment on it, please have your umbrella ready, because you're going to get sprayed with bull puckey. Racial slurs are !!!high-larious!!!! because Biden does it all the time. They're a great substitute for funny.

Posted by: Verity Kindle at August 23, 2011 06:25 PM (w+qbI)

216

You are a big f***ing deal!

Posted by: anginak at August 23, 2011 06:31 PM (wfcgq)

217 Biden foolishly attempts the "Chinese debt burden simulator"

Posted by: the cap'n at August 23, 2011 06:33 PM (f92A7)

218 Wow, you're big enough that I won't even have to turn my hat around.

Posted by: Michael at August 23, 2011 07:14 PM (Egs9x)

219 "So, you're the guy they call The Republican Tsunami? This... could be a big fuckin' deal."

Posted by: Jokin' Joe Biden at August 23, 2011 07:15 PM (dbYHP)

220 Oh Master of high speed trains, please allow me the honor of being your lowly disciple.

Posted by: Matt at August 23, 2011 07:19 PM (1ha9G)

221 "If you can snatch the beanie from my head without tearing out the hair plugs, Grasshopper, then you can leave the monastery."

Posted by: Pops53 at August 23, 2011 07:26 PM (SicTZ)

222 Mongo likes number 2 child with  steamed vegetables and duck sauce on the side.




Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 07:32 PM (xJU23)

223

How many times do I have to tell you? The bra goes on the front!

Posted by: Errol at August 23, 2011 07:37 PM (d2AYO)

224 I told you not to wash it in hot water!

Posted by: Errol at August 23, 2011 07:38 PM (d2AYO)

225 You paid HOW MUCH for that shirt?!

Posted by: Errol at August 23, 2011 07:38 PM (d2AYO)

226

"If you don't destroy the capitalism in this God forsaken country, you are going to end up alone, IN A TRAILER DOWN BY THE RIVER."

Posted by: Biden, ineffective motivational speaker at August 23, 2011 07:39 PM (1+rII)

227 Breast Men:

You can always spot them in a crowd

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 07:40 PM (xJU23)

228 (Guy with clenched teeth whispers) Shirt jokes are okay, just don't say ANYTHING about the hat!

Posted by: Errol at August 23, 2011 07:41 PM (d2AYO)

229 Whatever you do, don't look at the mole on his chest.He's very sensitive about it.

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 07:43 PM (xJU23)

230 Using only my intense psychic powers, I will now tap you on the right shoulder!

Posted by: Errol at August 23, 2011 07:44 PM (d2AYO)

231

Yeah, see, I was behind that goat just like this and....

 

Posted by: Errol at August 23, 2011 07:45 PM (d2AYO)

232 Chinese medicine my ass. This is the worst boob job ever.

 

Posted by: befuddled at August 23, 2011 07:50 PM (xJU23)

233 Holy crap! This guy is here to collect the loans - everybody run!

Posted by: CR at August 23, 2011 09:54 PM (MnSRY)

234 Mr. Biden is terrorized by a REAL racist teabagger.

Posted by: biggestsid at August 23, 2011 10:52 PM (qVKvM)

235 Is that a roll of fat or is it just a "One child" policy thing?

Posted by: tomc at August 24, 2011 04:15 AM (wAMWl)

236 You need to sticky this at the top of the blog for a few days. Sure to be  great comedy!

My favorites are #69, #222, and #251

Posted by: JT2 at August 24, 2011 05:37 AM (3hezO)

237 Oh those are easily b-cups

Posted by: Submariner at August 24, 2011 06:42 AM (/NIgz)

238 Wow, am I in a fairytale? That is one clean, articulate Oriental!

Posted by: Average Jen at August 24, 2011 07:55 AM (JdwfN)

239 Here's an even better photo of our courageous vice president: www.powerlineblog.com/archives/2011/08/photo-of-the-day-joe-biden-takes-aim.php

Posted by: Adirondack Patriot at August 24, 2011 09:36 AM (iAUf+)

240 MY GOD THAT IS A BIG BABY!

Posted by: Miikeb at August 24, 2011 10:03 AM (Wy05x)

241 LET'S GET READY TO BUMBLE !!!

Posted by: MICHAEL BUFFER at August 24, 2011 12:11 PM (SBIko)

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