Ace of Spades HQ

December 09, 2011

Dumbest Non-Office-Holding Liberal Yet?
— Ace

Her boobs aren't big enough to get away with being this dumb.

She'd need, guestimating here, like 36GGG's to balance this.

So, she needs to either read more or get life-impairing-sized breast implants.

And reading's hard, so I'm going to go ahead and advise the surgery.

Thanks to RD.

Posted by: Ace at 12:31 PM | Comments (232)
Post contains 57 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Old.

And busty.

Posted by: Waterhouse at December 09, 2011 12:31 PM (dp+c+)

2 But Brawndo is what plants crave....?

Posted by: njlibertarian at December 09, 2011 12:32 PM (R79sT)

3 Mitt Romney?

Ok now to read the post.

Posted by: Flapjackmaka at December 09, 2011 12:33 PM (U8jRK)

4 I think this was originally posted using lynx.

Posted by: Chuckit at December 09, 2011 12:33 PM (1kr1a)

5 Here in California, we call that "average," man.

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 09, 2011 12:33 PM (QKKT0)

6 Damn, only made it 34 seconds before giving up.

Posted by: FPW at December 09, 2011 12:33 PM (BDNF5)

7 I think this blog already posted on this back in the day.

I think.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at December 09, 2011 12:34 PM (aQomG)

8 She's smarter than Barry.

Posted by: toby928© at December 09, 2011 12:35 PM (GTbGH)

9 The most disturbing thing about the video is that nobody in the audience is cracking up.

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 09, 2011 12:35 PM (QKKT0)

10 Is it a double post if the original post was, like, a year ago?

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 09, 2011 12:35 PM (H/kgP)

11 MOM!?!?!?

Posted by: Gerg at December 09, 2011 12:35 PM (2Se1P)

Someone else can take one for the team here.

I denounce myself for being a sexist pig.

Posted by: Gmac at December 09, 2011 12:35 PM (k2Fyd)

13 I think this blog already posted on this back in the day.

It's like, um, evergreen, ya know. Organic evergreen.

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 09, 2011 12:36 PM (QKKT0)

14 I want to reproduce with her..........

Posted by: Wall-E at December 09, 2011 12:36 PM (48wze)

ace is all over current events. I think I know what the next post will be.

NIXON RESIGNS!!!!

Posted by: robtr at December 09, 2011 12:37 PM (MtwBb)

16 I betting her mind is epistemicly open.

Posted by: toby928© at December 09, 2011 12:37 PM (GTbGH)

17 I'd like to subscribe to her newzletter.

Posted by: Meghan McCain at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (H/kgP)

18 Does she have a degree from Harvard in economics?

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (QKKT0)

19 Hey! Didn't she give a shout out to Bush?

Posted by: mike at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (0hdwM)

Adam Corolla's self esteem theory on display.

She's had a lifetime of boys and men that want to get a hold of those beauties tell her that she's very special, what she has to say is important and gosh-darnit, she's got a right to be heard. Too much self-esteem, not enough self-awareness and plenty of boobage, a dangerous yet hilarious combination.

Posted by: Max Entropy at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (hT/1f)

21 not only old, but I think I saw it here.

Posted by: PR at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (T7Z8q)

22 Link for us at work?

Posted by: Arms Merchant at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (kPT11)

23 She makes Joe Biden look like Mensa material, or menstrual material. Your choice.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:38 PM (UlUS4)

24 Improve or mentally ill.

Posted by: mike at December 09, 2011 12:39 PM (0hdwM)

25 Nobel Peace Prize in 3... 2... 1...

Posted by: Max Entropy at December 09, 2011 12:39 PM (hT/1f)

26 betting her mind is epistemicly open.

That would explain that whistling sound when the wind's blowing.

Posted by: Kari Byron at December 09, 2011 12:39 PM (GBXon)

27 Improv or mentally ill.

Posted by: mike at December 09, 2011 12:39 PM (0hdwM)

28 but there are some days when I just can't find anything I care about. I knew this was old, and I suspected I'd posted it before. but on a day like today, I'm all about quantity, not quality.

Posted by: ace at December 09, 2011 12:40 PM (nj1bB)

29 She has a bright future as a staffer for some government or government subsidized office, or least a low budget craiglist cast pron movie to eventually be giving an Endowment for the Arts grant. (Pun intended?)

Posted by: Blue Falcon in Boston training for the ONT mudwrestling match at December 09, 2011 12:40 PM (ijjAe)

30 Applying sock-be-gone...

Posted by: DarkLord© for Prez! at December 09, 2011 12:40 PM (GBXon)

31 I think the audience is stunned into silence.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 12:40 PM (bxiXv)

32 She's playing with her hair. She wants me.

Posted by: Mike at December 09, 2011 12:40 PM (kPT11)

33 Even if this is an old post, I would totally find a way to shut her up that involved someone else's dick.

Posted by: Penfold at December 09, 2011 12:40 PM (1PeEC)

34 Dude. I don't care what the body's like, the mind can ruin it. I wouldn't hit that with an iridium-laced asteroid.

Posted by: DarkLord© for Prez! at December 09, 2011 12:41 PM (GBXon)

35
I have no audio, but the body language makes her look like an idiot 13-year-old.

Except for the Yeti-like bazongas.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 09, 2011 12:41 PM (QMtmy)

36 I would have to gag her to do her..

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at December 09, 2011 12:41 PM (f9c2L)

37 The baby in the front row is actually one of the fidgets from the E-Trade commercials, and he just said, if I suck on her when she lactates, will I catch the disease?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:42 PM (UlUS4)

ace is all over current events. I think I know what the next post will be.

NIXON RESIGNS!!!!

Highlighting dumbassery has no expiration....n'stuff.

Posted by: Lady in Black at December 09, 2011 12:42 PM (ycuSb)

39 italics FAIL. Damn.

Posted by: Lady in Black at December 09, 2011 12:42 PM (ycuSb)

40 LOL @ 1:35 - even the kid behind her is shaking his head.

And what kind of sicko claps at the end?

Gawd, this woman votes.

Posted by: Rex Harrison's Hat at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (4136b)

41 Meh. It's Megan McCain with a Casey Anthony wig.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (UlUS4)

42 Number 9, I share your concern. Kept looking for indications of disgust, humor, impatience, shitting of pants, etc., but saw none. They are all on drugs.

Posted by: Moe Ron at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (yWDpP)

43 I would have to gag her to do her..

Call me.

Best,

Posted by: Mike at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (QKKT0)

44 If you look closely you'll see she's have what is known as an epistemic seizure.

And tits.

Posted by: Fritz at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (/ZZCn)

45 Pelosi's daughter?

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (h+qn8)

46 Has she considered running for Congress?

Posted by: Passably Affable at December 09, 2011 12:43 PM (sGRXI)

47 I think I've seen that video before. In Beta-max.

Posted by: huerfano at December 09, 2011 12:44 PM (7wEgI)

48 Food is Good.

Posted by: Emil Faber at December 09, 2011 12:44 PM (QKKT0)

49 Candy Samples, please pick up the white courtesy bone, er, phone.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:44 PM (UlUS4)

50 How come no post about GOProud outing one of Perry's campaign managers?

Posted by: mike at December 09, 2011 12:45 PM (0hdwM)

51
Not just a double post, but a double-D post.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (QMtmy)

52 ace, you should have posted this again --

The Best Business Pitch Ever?

Posted by: laceyunderalls at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (aQomG)

53 Well, it was really just an attempt to overcome fear of public speaking by taking an OD of cough medicine. At the end: Said: "Next speaker?" Unsaid: "Dear God, please, please, help us!" The person clapping is either a relative or boyfriend.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (bxiXv)

54 "Vegetable trees....."

Really.

I think that's where this chick came from.

Posted by: NC Ref at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (/izg2)

55 Her titties are pretty big though. Most women that testify at city council meetings are hideous and mentally ill. She is just mentally ill, so I would allow her testimony and then talk to her afterwords in hopes of getting a handy in the parking lot.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (+lsX1)

56 LINCOLN IS NOMINATED, DEFEATS SEWARD, CHASE

Posted by: BREAKING NEWS at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (Y7JPI)

57 Compare and contrast: Miss Big Tits vs.: Rep. Hank "Guam tipping over" Johnson Rep. Maxine Waters Rep. Sheila "plant the flag on Mars" Lee VP Joe "Slow Joe" Biden

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:46 PM (UlUS4)

58 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at December 09, 2011 12:47 PM (7WJOC)

59 I bet you guys didn't know that Meghan McCain once was a brunette. Now you know.

Posted by: Todd 3465 at December 09, 2011 12:47 PM (spa4d)

60 You know, honey, actually if you don't ever want to go on a second date that's cool with me.

Posted by: Mike at December 09, 2011 12:47 PM (Y7JPI)

61 Did anybody get a sense of what she was on about? I got about a minute and a half in and then listening to this caused my IQ to plummet to the point that I forgot to breathe.

Posted by: joncelli, too stressed by half at December 09, 2011 12:48 PM (RD7QR)

62 And you can bet your sweet asses that Tits McGee here and Rachel Sequoia that I linked at #52 are part of the Occupy "movement".

Posted by: laceyunderalls at December 09, 2011 12:48 PM (aQomG)

63 Posted by: Todd 3465 at December 09, 2011 04:47 PM (spa4d) See #41

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:48 PM (UlUS4)

64 Wasn't this posted here in an ONT once or twice?

Posted by: Â© Sponge at December 09, 2011 12:48 PM (UK9cE)

65 Yeah it's positively archaic by internet standards which means it's at least 3 years old. And has already appeared here at least twice that I know of.

And who knew they still have slavery on the east coast?

Posted by: Mætenloch at December 09, 2011 12:48 PM (pAlYe)

66 Wait, there's some video you have to see about some single mother in Florida who says she won't have to worry about paying for her gas and mortgage with Obama in charge

Posted by: kbdabear at December 09, 2011 12:49 PM (Y+DPZ)

Damn stupid, but at least she doesn't come across as haftin to be uproared..

Posted by: Jimmah at December 09, 2011 12:49 PM (TMeYE)

68 Number 9, I share your concern. Kept looking for indications of disgust, humor, impatience, shitting of pants, etc., but saw none. They are all on drugs.

Posted by: Moe Ron at December 09, 2011 04:43 PM (yWDpP)

And/or drooling imbeciles. I'm going with both.

Posted by: ErikW at December 09, 2011 12:49 PM (AmOPs)

69 "Occupy Decolletage" A novel by Ron Jeremy

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 09, 2011 12:49 PM (UlUS4)

70 34 Dude. I don't care what the body's like, the mind can ruin it.

Problems have solutions.

Posted by: Duct Tape at December 09, 2011 12:50 PM (Y7JPI)

Tig 'ol Biddies

Posted by: garrett at December 09, 2011 12:50 PM (plN+2)

72 50
How come no post about GOProud outing one of Perry's campaign managers?

Posted by: mike at December 09, 2011 04:45 PM (0hdwM)

Gosh what an upstanding organization they are that Gabe constantly licks the boots of

Posted by: buzzion at December 09, 2011 12:50 PM (GULKT)

73 Clarence is a she???!!!

Posted by: speedster1 at December 09, 2011 12:50 PM (v40Bj)

74 DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN!!!

Posted by: Next big scoop at December 09, 2011 12:50 PM (/izg2)

75 That is SOOOOOO much better with the sound off.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 12:50 PM (bxiXv)

76 Rep. Hank "Guam tipping over" Johnson

It's the Senate's fault, the NRA's fault and the Second Amendment's fault.

Posted by: huerfano at December 09, 2011 12:51 PM (7wEgI)

77 I knew this was old, and I suspected I'd posted it before.

but on a day like today, I'm all about quantity, not quality.

Posted by: ace at December 09, 2011 04:40 PM (nj1bB)

Thus the obsession with Valu-Rite.....

Posted by: Â© Sponge at December 09, 2011 12:51 PM (UK9cE)

78 It's got electrolytes.

Posted by: EC at December 09, 2011 12:51 PM (R15UB)

79 Hey, did anyone catch that tv episode of Lucy and Ethel working at the candy factory?

Posted by: kbdabear at December 09, 2011 12:51 PM (Y+DPZ)

80 #64 yeah so you posted an obvious joke right before I did. Don't worry I'll give you credit.

Posted by: Todd 3465 at December 09, 2011 12:51 PM (spa4d)

81

Pacific War Ends

We Won!

Posted by: toby928© at December 09, 2011 12:53 PM (GTbGH)

82 I saw this years ago. I still have no idea what this chick is talking about. Just inane babble as far as I can tell. Maybe she needs her diaper changed?

Posted by: maddogg at December 09, 2011 12:53 PM (OlN4e)

83 Lemme at them funbags.

Posted by: USS Diversity at December 09, 2011 12:53 PM (PddVe)

84 but on a day like today, I'm all about quantity, not quality.

Posted by: ace at December 09, 2011 04:40 PM (nj1bB)

Sorry, but they pick up the trash on Thursdays.

If it will help, I have bag of dog shit and leaves in the backyard that you can hump.

Posted by: Marco Rubio at December 09, 2011 12:53 PM (plN+2)

85 at least she is not using a teleprompter.

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 12:54 PM (h+qn8)

86 I think I dated her in High School

Posted by: CheshireLion at December 09, 2011 12:55 PM (tqE0E)

87 She's a double post all on her own.

Posted by: nickless will probably get accidentally banned again soon at December 09, 2011 12:55 PM (MMC8r)

88 I think I've seen that video before. In Beta-max.

Ah, Ace, I appreciate you taking one for the team and posting something old so that the morons can abuse you and have a place to amuse Mr. Breitbart.

Posted by: Mama AJ at December 09, 2011 12:55 PM (XdlcF)

89 Damn you all, I was going to watch all these old videos, there was TIME now !!!!

Posted by: Burgess Meredith at December 09, 2011 12:55 PM (Y+DPZ)

90
Yeah, double re-post, but I played it again just for the laughs. and the jiggles.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 09, 2011 12:56 PM (JYheX)

91
8====D .... { O }{ O }

Voila!

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 09, 2011 12:56 PM (QMtmy)

92 Sloppy choad monger!

Posted by: hutch1200 at December 09, 2011 12:56 PM (XouHj)

93 So is this an open thread?

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 12:56 PM (5H6zj)

94 Oof, that's some weapons grade stupid right there.

Posted by: Channing, unelected OWS Tour Guide at December 09, 2011 12:56 PM (4136b)

95 maybe Fridays we should grab the best of the silliest Left thoughts ever.
to roll us into the week-end with a little hope for change.

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 12:57 PM (h+qn8)

96 I heard Super Bowl III is coming up. Who should I bet on?

Posted by: Joe Biden at December 09, 2011 12:57 PM (Y+DPZ)

97
A ... Almost Boobs
B ... Barely there.
C ... Can't Complain!
D ... Damn!
DD... Double damn!
E ... Enormous!
F ... Fake

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 09, 2011 12:58 PM (QMtmy)

98 The funny thing is, I think she set a record for the use of the word "really" for a 3 minute speech, yet it was also my only reaction after hearing her express her breasts self.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 09, 2011 12:58 PM (HBqDo)

99 87 I think I dated her in High School

Posted by: CheshireLion at December 09, 2011 04:55 PM (tqE0E)

And I almost married her....and junk

Posted by: Racist, Right-Wing Terrorist in Midwest...Or Tea Party Member for Short at December 09, 2011 12:58 PM (fOPv7)

100 I'm surprised that she hasn't been on Tosh.O for a Web Redemption. She certainly needs to redeem SOMETHING after THAT display of epic ass-douchery.

Posted by: Â© Sponge at December 09, 2011 12:59 PM (UK9cE)

101 I heard Super Bowl III is coming up. Who should I bet on?

Heidi.

Posted by: toby928© at December 09, 2011 12:59 PM (GTbGH)

102
I like the golf clap at the end.

and its free.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 09, 2011 12:59 PM (JYheX)

103 So is this an open thread?

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 04:56 PM (5H6zj)

The theme is small brains/big tits. Please comment accordingly.

Posted by: The AoSHQ Moderator at December 09, 2011 12:59 PM (QKKT0)

104
breast thread ever

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 09, 2011 12:59 PM (QMtmy)

105 Thanks for the edgy video, wingnutz

I'm off to buy a 2011 calendar before Mr Johnson runs out of them!

Posted by: Kilgore Trout at December 09, 2011 12:59 PM (Y+DPZ)

106 I got to 31 seconds on the video and stopped it. That was a very painful 31 seconds.

Posted by: Mandy P. is hoping for a Texas miracle at December 09, 2011 01:00 PM (qFpRI)

107 Crap, that was SB II.

Posted by: toby928© at December 09, 2011 01:00 PM (GTbGH)

108 GOProud outs Perry campaign staffer (stolen from Hot Gas).

How's that truce working out again?

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:01 PM (5H6zj)

109 I'm headed for the Dominican, Dildo Heads!

Posted by: Rush Limpcock at December 09, 2011 01:01 PM (z0HdK)

110 Thanks for the edgy video, wingnutz

I'm off to buy a 2011 calendar before Mr Johnson runs out of them!

Posted by: Kilgore Trout at December 09, 2011 04:59 PM (Y+DPZ)

I just got mine yesterday. EPIC!!!!! Charles is soooooooooo, like, Awesome.

Posted by: Sharmuta at December 09, 2011 01:01 PM (UK9cE)

111 if you are particular about breasts , does that mean we need Therapy chat today?

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 01:01 PM (h+qn8)

112 Gotta be some kind of parody. No one could be that dumb and still be alive; she would be unable to manipulate food into her mouth.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at December 09, 2011 01:01 PM (DuH+r)

113 Posted by: The AoSHQ Moderator at December 09, 2011 04:59 PM

OK. To comply with thread rules I'll amend my post to ad that GOProud are a bunch of boobs.

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:02 PM (5H6zj)

114 Hey, Y-not, I've been meaning to catch up with you since the Thanksgiving recipe thread. At least I think it was you who posted a similar recipe...the mind fogs...

We used to re-create an appetizer we had once at a restaurant:

Gorgonzola stuffed dates wrapped in pancetta or prosciutto, sauted in a brandy butter sauce.

Posted by: Mama AJ, drooling on the keyboard...more than usual at December 09, 2011 01:02 PM (XdlcF)

115 I got to 31 seconds on the video and stopped it. That was a very painful 31 seconds.

Posted by: Mandy P. is hoping for a Texas miracle at December 09, 2011 05:00 PM (qFpRI)

And that video is edited. Imagine if you were there live and heard it in it's entirety.

Posted by: Â© Sponge at December 09, 2011 01:02 PM (UK9cE)

116 Mary Clogginstein before she moved to Vermont !!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Wall-E at December 09, 2011 01:02 PM (48wze)

117 It's certainly easy to make fun of an accent instead of addressing the content of her speech (though if she were Hispanic rather than Valley Girl you might have a bit more shame about it. I suspect you're all particularly upset about "the land is free" business. As good little conservatives, you all know that only global agribusiness conglomerates get such subsidies, and the small business owners you pretend to love get screwed.

Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 01:02 PM (Rz2/W)

118 I only made it half-way through to conclude she'd be a perfect Representative for California and a fantastic #OccupyAirhead leader. But I repeat myself.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at December 09, 2011 01:03 PM (eHIJJ)

119 Gorgonzola stuffed dates wrapped in pancetta or prosciutto, sauted in a brandy butter sauce.

Mmmm... that sounds great!

Damn, now I'm hungry.

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:03 PM (5H6zj)

120

Shit- I feel dumber just having to sit thu that.

Posted by: Julie at December 09, 2011 01:03 PM (O/fK8)

121 Close your eyes and it sounds like a first grader.

Posted by: real joe at December 09, 2011 01:03 PM (30+Gl)

122 Ladies and Gentleman "The Next Governor of California" Miss.............

Posted by: Wall-E at December 09, 2011 01:04 PM (48wze)

123
I didn't know business real property improvement district assessments could be so... titillating.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at December 09, 2011 01:04 PM (QMtmy)

124 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W)

Hi, "Hal".

Posted by: Greg at December 09, 2011 01:04 PM (Y7JPI)

125 >>>It's certainly easy to make fun of an accent instead of addressing the content of her speech (though if she were Hispanic rather than Valley Girl you might have a bit more shame about it. Nah, we hate spics too.

Posted by: ace at December 09, 2011 01:04 PM (nj1bB)

126 Hal, soooo her breasts were that impressive, eh?

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 01:04 PM (h+qn8)

127 Ehh, I'd probably still hit it. I'd have my mp3 player going, though.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 01:05 PM (bxiXv)

128 HAL this is Dave. You can go to sleep now.........................

Posted by: Wall-E at December 09, 2011 01:05 PM (48wze)

129 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W)

Average Joe is here to stir the pot.

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 09, 2011 01:05 PM (QKKT0)

130 This was posted on this very blog about two years ago. By a blogger named "Ace," if memory serves.

Posted by: Emperor of Icecream, Cultist for Jesus at December 09, 2011 01:05 PM (epBek)

131 D-R-I-N-K-Y-O-U-R-O-V-A-L-T-I-N-E

Posted by: toby928© at December 09, 2011 01:05 PM (GTbGH)

132 Or as I like to put it, I'm not bigoted. I hate everybody.

But with a tag like mine, you probably guessed that already.

Posted by: DarkLord© for Prez! at December 09, 2011 01:05 PM (GBXon)

133 I suspect you're all particularly upset about "the land is free" business. As good little conservatives, you all know that only global agribusiness conglomerates get such subsidies, and the small business owners you pretend to love get screwed.

Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W)

No, asswipe. I'm pissed off that she said fruit and vegetables come from TREES!!! No WONDER I don't have any tomatoes. I planted the wrong TREE.

Posted by: Â© Sponge at December 09, 2011 01:06 PM (UK9cE)

134 ace: "but there are some days when I just can't find anything I care about."

How's about more movie reviews dating tips? Those go over pretty well.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at December 09, 2011 01:06 PM (eHIJJ)

135
Hal's looking for a date I guess.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 09, 2011 01:06 PM (JYheX)

136 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W) What the fuck? Of everything you could have done, you're defending the *content* of that drool-laden stream of semi-consciousness? What are you, some kind of East-coast slave-owner?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 01:06 PM (bxiXv)

137 Hal, I hope free land, means you will give up yours so that i may create a lovely garden?

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 01:06 PM (h+qn8)

138 Her boobs aren't big enough to get away with being this dumb.

Oh yes they are!

Posted by: ABouts at December 09, 2011 01:06 PM (BQvS5)

139 Hey, I'm more smarter than somebody out there !!!

Posted by: Meghan McCain, English is my 2nd language at December 09, 2011 01:07 PM (Y+DPZ)

140 Average Joe is here to stir the pot. Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 09, 2011 05:05 PM (QKKT0) I'm still in the mood for pissing in trolls' cheerios, and he is the *classic* asshole troll, ain't he?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 01:07 PM (bxiXv)

141 I want to hear that redone human megaphone style!

Posted by: Rob Roy at December 09, 2011 01:07 PM (/MnxB)

142 ..and with her tits flopping about...

Posted by: Rob Roy at December 09, 2011 01:08 PM (/MnxB)

143 this land is your land this land is my land, from CALIFORNIA.

she took that literally.

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 01:08 PM (h+qn8)

144 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W)

This 'tard is not related to me in any way.

Posted by: HAL 9000 at December 09, 2011 01:08 PM (dp+c+)

145 What if my slaves are hispanic? I'm pretty sure the racism cancels each other out.

Posted by: MJ at December 09, 2011 01:08 PM (BKOsZ)

146 Hal, open the pod bay doors. Co2 levels are getting too high!

Posted by: Subsidized Midwestern Slave Owning AgriGiant at December 09, 2011 01:09 PM (4136b)

147 If you break all the letters in "Hal" into tiny matchsticks and rearrange them backwards and upside down and sideways and then stand on your head staring at them for several days until you die of an embolism you get A-V-E-R-A-G-E-J-O-E.

Posted by: The War Between the Undead States at December 09, 2011 01:09 PM (Y7JPI)

148 shallow hal's doppleganger

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 01:09 PM (h+qn8)

149 If someone can post something so silly and yet spell all the big words correctly and use correct grammar, one might suspect that the poster is above Average.

Posted by: Mama AJ at December 09, 2011 01:09 PM (XdlcF)

150 126 - ace, I think you broke your own rule there

Posted by: kbdabear at December 09, 2011 01:10 PM (Y+DPZ)

151 Nah, we hate spics too.

Posted by: ace at December 09, 2011 05:04 PM (nj1bB)

Does that go for Specs, too?

Posted by: Zombie Herve Villachaize at December 09, 2011 01:10 PM (plN+2)

152 139 Her boobs aren't big enough to get away with being this dumb.

Oh yes they are!

Posted by: ABouts at December 09, 2011 05:06 PM (BQvS5)

We should knock her down and then watch her try to get back up.

Posted by: BigUns R Usins at December 09, 2011 01:10 PM (fOPv7)

153 You people are fucking idiots.

*plants filet mignon tree

Posted by: MJ at December 09, 2011 01:11 PM (BKOsZ)

154 i changed my mind about therapy

Posted by: willow channels Maet at December 09, 2011 01:11 PM (h+qn8)

155 Oh, off the topic of nothing, I saw a billboard yesterday for a local landscaping company. Not trying to get customers, but wanting workers.

And mentioning, right there on the billboard, that they use E-Verify.

Posted by: Mama AJ at December 09, 2011 01:11 PM (XdlcF)

156 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W)

Average Joe (or Navycopjoe in a puckish mood). Check his rant to see if every third word spells out his name.

Posted by: joncelli, too stressed by half at December 09, 2011 01:11 PM (RD7QR)

157 AJ and erg on the same afternoon?

The SEIU must have gotten some extra funding for their trolls

Bring Raykon and dum-dum around and we can have a free for all

Posted by: kbdabear at December 09, 2011 01:11 PM (Y+DPZ)

158 It hurts when you realize that people such as this breed and vote. Either she's really that stupid, or she's an actress playing the Valley Girl Cali denizen stereotype to less than enthusiastic audience.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at December 09, 2011 01:12 PM (UR5vq)

159 Given all that God has blessed her with., why would she need brains.

In fact, as long as I can see her from the front, I really don't know what she is saying.

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at December 09, 2011 01:12 PM (HqpV0)

160 Craigslist ad:

Looking for an Asian female, no musical or artistic ability required. In fact, any such ability would only serve as a hinderance to the overall authenticity of the performance. Must be mousy-voiced and yet have the ability to caterwaul. I can't stress this enough - sheer stridency is of the utmost importance. The ability to appear witchy even while dressing in all white is a plus, as would be an ingratiating clinginess. The goal is not to perform - the goal is the THREAT of actual performance, which will be mercifully avoided.

Please provide a list of any successful bands you have destroyed, highest decibel level achieved, and bag size (BAG WILL BE PROVIDED). Physical attractiveness is frowned upon.

No weirdos.

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:12 PM (5H6zj)

161 Simple Hal: "She m-m-m--m-m-m-makes me happy!"

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 01:12 PM (bxiXv)

162 I hope the smartest president evah doesn't see this video, lest start handing out funding for the planting of vegetable trees and machines that make fruit.

Posted by: MissTammy at December 09, 2011 01:13 PM (SsG4J)

163 She's an average lib with well-below average charm. Darken her skin, get her a ghost-writer for her memoirs, and make her Harvard Law Review editor, get another ghost-writer for her second memoir, and right there, ladies and gentlemen, is the next President of the United States.

Posted by: Mmmm...Scoamfy! at December 09, 2011 01:15 PM (xHenH)

164 No weirdos. Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 05:12 PM (5H6zj) Right up to that point I was thinking Margaret Cho had found a new line of work.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at December 09, 2011 01:15 PM (bxiXv)

165 didn't she say the bush administration was really good? where's the original video? i think they cut it down to make her part of the tea-party.

Posted by: Twig at December 09, 2011 01:15 PM (w9N0m)

166 Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 05:12 PM (5H6zj)

Somebody's still a bit bitter about that breakup, I think.

Posted by: joncelli, too stressed by half at December 09, 2011 01:15 PM (RD7QR)

167 She needs a tight tee shirt that says "I'm just trying to contribute to Global Intelligence"

Posted by: ontherocks at December 09, 2011 01:15 PM (HBqDo)

168 A Token of My Extreme

Posted by: Frank Zappa at December 09, 2011 01:16 PM (plN+2)

169 MissTammy, she realizes vegetables need water? and grow and one day some sick jerk comes along and tears it out of the ground by its roots, slices its heads off like brocolli , cuts it's eyes out liek potatos. with nary a tear?

Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 01:16 PM (h+qn8)

170 A few chuckles to be found on the talkbass forum on dumb Craigslist ads. Here's another one:

Need Bass that bad? (baltimore)

I play guitar and like all kinds of music. Rock, all types of metal, etc...even indie might be okay. Some of my favorites are hard rock, post-hardcore, metalcore and alternative. Lets face it, bass isn't hard to play for MOST styled these days. I do NOT have a bass right now. If you need a bass player really bad and have a bass guitar and amp, let me know and I can probably fill in for you. I want to buy a bass and stack soon anyway, when funds allow.

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:16 PM (5H6zj)

171

Greg just sent Dana Perino to the Double Down for a Bacon Martini!!!

That's my buddies' bar.

Posted by: garrett at December 09, 2011 01:17 PM (plN+2)

172 Well, it's Friday. That's gotta mean another document dump!

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:18 PM (5H6zj)

173 How about reposting the vid of the douchebag with the 4-panel pop-up book business cards? That was a good one. "You see my business card? BAM! Blowjob from a Ukrainian model. Look at your weakass card. You'd have to give a wino that card PLUS smack money to get him to jack you off in a bus station."

Posted by: Master Chief Brock Obama at December 09, 2011 01:18 PM (XE2Oo)

174

That's gotta mean another ... dump!

Sorry. Feeling a little impacted today...

Reggie's going away party was last night.

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at December 09, 2011 01:19 PM (plN+2)

175 Hey Barry, I'm right here!

Posted by: Kal Penn at December 09, 2011 01:20 PM (PddVe)

176 Is this Ace's version of Ten Years Ago In Instapundit?

Posted by: andycanuck at December 09, 2011 01:23 PM (sHY5w)

177

Hey Barry, I'm right here!

Too late. Damn, I'd have loved a good Dutch Rudder while Reggie was still here. He's stingy with the reacharounds...

You could toss my salad?

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at December 09, 2011 01:24 PM (plN+2)

178 Posted by: willow at December 09, 2011 05:16 PM (h+qn

Shhhh, willow, we don't want to make her cry.

Posted by: MissTammy at December 09, 2011 01:25 PM (SsG4J)

179

Lemme call NPH....

Posted by: Kal Penn at December 09, 2011 01:26 PM (PddVe)

180 If I were that useless, my mother would have drowned me at 15.

Posted by: lauraw at December 09, 2011 01:27 PM (COLhh)

181 Looking for an Asian female, no musical or artistic ability required. In fact, any such ability would only serve as a hinderance to the overall authenticity of the performance.

For a minute there, I thought this was beanervt.

Posted by: MissTammy at December 09, 2011 01:28 PM (SsG4J)

182 Well, here's something along the lines of "Mike."

Posted by: Y-not at December 09, 2011 01:28 PM (5H6zj)

183 The East coast has slaves... who knew?

Posted by: sTevo at December 09, 2011 01:32 PM (VMcEw)

184 It's not old, it's classic.

Posted by: Comrade Arthur at December 09, 2011 01:32 PM (7hwUm)

185 MAKE HER THE PESTICIDE CZAR....

Gawd - so bloody stoopid it made my hair hurt...

Posted by: jethro at December 09, 2011 01:33 PM (8kUqK)

186

She sounds just like every Big Ten coed.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Racism Identifier at December 09, 2011 01:35 PM (5SvYE)

187 rabble rabble rabble rabble BUT REICH WING CONS ARE TEH STOOPED!!!111!! rabble rabble rabble THAT DUMB SNOWBILLY WHORE SAID SHE COULD SEE RUSSIA FROM HER HOUSE!!111!!!!1 rabble rabble rabble rabble BUSHITLER LIED!!!111!!!! rabble rabble rabble

Posted by: Obfuscating Prog Fuckwit at December 09, 2011 01:40 PM (AlW15)

188 Wow, Ace is now double posting with a two year time delay.

Meth is a hell of a drug.

Posted by: cool breeze at December 09, 2011 01:40 PM (WHbTd)

189 Any guesses as to what will be in the Friday Dumocrat document dump?

Posted by: An Observation at December 09, 2011 01:50 PM (ylhEn)

190 If I were not a technical writer, I would take her in a manly manner. Because she's pretty. Meanwhile, I'll be in my bunk.

Posted by: Lickmuffin at December 09, 2011 01:50 PM (D8lMF)

191 I just got mine yesterday. EPIC!!!!! Charles is soooooooooo, like, Awesome.

Posted by: Sharmuta at December 09, 2011 05:01 PM

Actually Sharmuta was driven from the tribe by Iceweasel, his girlfriend. Irish Rose outed iceweasel as a former porn actress after she left the tribe

Or so I read

Posted by: kbdabear at December 09, 2011 01:52 PM (Y+DPZ)

192 I'm guessing today's document dump will have all of the Holder and Obama emails where they set up F&F - only they'll be translated into Austrian to keep anyone from being able to read them.

Posted by: An Observation at December 09, 2011 01:58 PM (ylhEn)

193 Right -- Rick Perry is so much more articulate than she is. But he would eliminate the Department of Pesticides, the Department of Vegetables, and help me here, what was the third one? Maybe he wrote it on that rock at N***head ranch.

Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 01:59 PM (Rz2/W)

194 But he would eliminate the Department of Pesticides, the Department of Vegetables, and help me here, what was the third one?

The Department of Anagrams.

Posted by: A-v-e-r-a-g-e J-e-r-k at December 09, 2011 02:06 PM (Y7JPI)

195 She is the prototypical Pelosi voter.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, working towards full Curmudgeonhood at December 09, 2011 02:08 PM (d0Tfm)

196 Yeah, blast from the past.

Sad thing is it used to be funny, not status-quo par for the course every day type of thing. Since then we've had congress critters and a president making her look like a jet payload physicist.

I think that's what Ace is trying to imply here.

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at December 09, 2011 02:13 PM (Qxdfp)

197 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:59 PM (Rz2/W)

Is that your Mom, Gerg?

Posted by: HAL 9000 at December 09, 2011 02:15 PM (smit2)

198

She is so smart. I love her hair.

Posted by: boxxy at December 09, 2011 02:21 PM (t2Twx)

199 The backs of her knees are kind of nice. That's something.

Posted by: Kensington at December 09, 2011 02:25 PM (/AHDz)

200 That gene pool should have been drained 3 generations ago.

Posted by: Lojack at December 09, 2011 02:28 PM (9CHrJ)

201 She still has quite a long way to go before she reaches the levels of stupid attained by Sheila Jackson Lee, however.

Posted by: MissTammy at December 09, 2011 02:29 PM (SsG4J)

202 This woman is Exhibit A explaining why CA is so boned.

Posted by: A_Fib at December 09, 2011 02:30 PM (dpU+d)

203 It is painful to watch

Posted by: Prophet of Truth at December 09, 2011 02:33 PM (e8kgV)

204 It would be so, you know, great if we had politicians that weren't able to, you know, lie through their teeth, so maybe they could be replace with, you know, toothless politicians.

Posted by: Prophet of Truth at December 09, 2011 02:34 PM (e8kgV)

205 There is always room for Jello.

Posted by: sTevo at December 09, 2011 02:37 PM (VMcEw)

206 "And I'd like to thank the Nobel committee ..."

Posted by: Tits McGee at December 09, 2011 02:57 PM (cqydL)

207 Dumbest liberal? Nahhh

This is middle of the road average for them.

Posted by: Evan at December 09, 2011 03:56 PM (O3OlP)

208

I married an intelligent but evil woman.

To say it didn't work out would be an understatement.

I've learned to appreciate non-evil women, smart or not.

I hope she's not evil, and she makes some lucky guy very happy.

Temperament is huge, and she seems very sweet.

There are plenty of guys out there that are that dumb, but aren't that verbal.

Intelligence is overrated by the intelligent.

Intelligence is a gift; you are born with it. You didn't do anything to deserve it.

You are not responsible for being dumb if you can't help it.

Posted by: sadder but wiser at December 09, 2011 04:04 PM (t2Twx)

209 Really old and still really funny.

Posted by: AndrewsDad at December 09, 2011 04:11 PM (C2//T)

210 Stevie Vie from Zappa's band had a song about this... Not kidding.

Posted by: TomH at December 09, 2011 04:32 PM (wOrAR)

211

Intelligence is overrated by the intelligent.

Intelligence is a gift; you are born with it. You didn't do anything to deserve it.

You are not responsible for being dumb if you can't help it.

That is good stuff. I suspect you will take a beating here in the comments but you are correct.

That said, Liberalism claims its adherants come to it through intellectual prowess. Clearly this is not always the case.

And she does look comfy.

Posted by: kdny at December 09, 2011 04:37 PM (SrCor)

212 Wow this is soo helpful I have been trying to figure this out on my own for a long time now. Hopefully making this change will help encourage discussion on my blog.

Posted by: The Sojourn ePub at December 09, 2011 04:59 PM (sDk1i)

213 I think this was originally posted using lynx.

HAHAHAHA!

Posted by: pajama momma at December 09, 2011 05:16 PM (wdYeF)

214 You made a few good points there. I did a search on the matter and found a good number of people will agree with your blog.

Posted by: Locked On epub at December 09, 2011 05:19 PM (B8WDu)

215 When did Meghan McCain dye her hair dark? No, seriously, I want this chick to get her own reality show.

Posted by: azkag at December 09, 2011 05:24 PM (qVjM6)

216

Well there's a minute of my life I'll never get back again.

Sheesh Ace, I'd rather watch paint dry of play bingo than listen to that life support system for a female sex organ prattle on. Good Grief!

Posted by: chuck in st paul at December 09, 2011 05:27 PM (EhYdw)

217 This web site is my breathing in, really fantastic pattern and perfect subject matter.

Posted by: Who Fears Death ePub at December 09, 2011 05:33 PM (XwRTS)

218 Old.

And busty.

Posted by: Waterhouse at December 09, 2011 04:31 PM (dp+c+)

Yes to the former, hardly on the latter.

36GGG's to balance this.

So, she needs to either read more or get life-worth-living-sized breast implants.-Ace

Fixed it for you Ace.

Posted by: CAC at December 09, 2011 05:44 PM (aywBY)

219 Are you done reposting links from 3 years ago?

Posted by: Rollory at December 09, 2011 05:48 PM (T+g/u)

220 IÂ’ve been looking everywhere for this! Thank goodness I found it on Bing.Thx

Posted by: The Talk Show Murders AudioBook at December 09, 2011 05:51 PM (S8UYb)

221 Big Comfy Chair politics as usual.

Posted by: Corona at December 09, 2011 06:39 PM (fh2Y7)

222 California is doomed.

Posted by: rumcrook at December 09, 2011 06:54 PM (60WiD)

223 My understanding is that their is a sorority at UCSC that sends pledges to council meetings to do this kind of stuff. I have seen about a dozen of them, these girls are awesome.

Posted by: Roy at December 09, 2011 06:56 PM (tCLC5)

224 california is only doomed if you're one of the ones that ain't got no moneys.

Posted by: The Deej at December 09, 2011 07:27 PM (Zb6Vo)

225 Oh god help me. I've had about six drinks and I found that funny. It should have taken a quart and a couple of bongs.

Old and Busty !

Jesus didn't just weep at that, he blew snot through His nose laughing.

Posted by: West at December 09, 2011 07:27 PM (aZLpo)

226 that vid is at least three years old btw

Posted by: The Deej at December 09, 2011 07:28 PM (Zb6Vo)

227 IÂ’ve been looking everywhere for this! Thank goodness I found it on Bing.Thx

Posted by: The Fiery Trial ePub at December 09, 2011 11:37 PM (lkCSV)

228 She would be proud of Ace - for recycling old YouTube clips and stuff.

Posted by: TWoPolitics at December 10, 2011 02:46 AM (YOZVY)

229 I believe we have found the replacement for Hank Johnson!!

Posted by: PapaBear at December 10, 2011 03:53 AM (XQcOC)

230 137 Posted by: Hal at December 09, 2011 05:02 PM (Rz2/W)

William! Is that you?

Posted by: creeper at December 10, 2011 05:27 AM (gre5a)

231 ITYM "54GGG". A woman who is "36GGG" would have a ribcage the size of a 2-liter pop bottle. (When I was going to the U of Illinois too many years ago, there was a girl around campus known as "54 inches". I saw her up close a few times. She wasn't fat. 54GGG...)

Posted by: Rich Rostrom at December 10, 2011 06:13 PM (3j6jL)

232 @#8 But she is right up there with Rep Hank Johnson who was also featured on today's page.

Posted by: Rally at December 11, 2011 03:54 AM (/ZUI1)

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