Ace of Spades HQ

October 12, 2011

Feds Arrest Crusading Hero of Freedom, and Ass
— Ace

Scarlett Johansson's hacker is going to jail.

Posted by: Ace at 01:44 PM | Comments (112)
Post contains 23 words, total size 1 kb.

1 It would have been nice if TheOneÂ™ had dickpic'd Scarlett, and then he hacked the phone.

Posted by: John P. Squibob at October 12, 2011 01:46 PM (kqqGm)

2 I'm so conflicted.

When did conflicted become a synonym for turgid?

Posted by: John P. Squibob at October 12, 2011 01:46 PM (kqqGm)

3 This guy is going to be treated like a hero in prison. He gave all prisoners a reason to rub one out instead of ass-raping their cellmate.

Posted by: EC at October 12, 2011 01:47 PM (R15UB)

4 Seems to me that if you don't want nude photos of yourself out there, then maybe you shouldn't take any to begin with. Yes, the dude is a criminal and deserves jail time, but if nobody ever took the pics....

Posted by: tcn at October 12, 2011 01:51 PM (hQX3k)

5 No link to pics? Really? What have we become...

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 01:51 PM (66gFW)

6
If the tits are the shit, you must acquit.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at October 12, 2011 01:51 PM (QMtmy)

7 Pics or it didn't happen. Case dismissed.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 01:51 PM (ieDPL)

8 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.Scarlet thinks he's just fabulous.

Posted by: steevy at October 12, 2011 01:52 PM (fyOgS)

9 "Christopher Chaney was fingered"

Ewwwwwwww!!!!

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 01:53 PM (ieDPL)

10 2 Never happen,cause he's teh ghey.

Posted by: steevy at October 12, 2011 01:53 PM (fyOgS)

11 I have one word for the stupid scrunt. Polaroid.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 01:53 PM (ZDUD4)

12 "Christopher Chaney was fingered in a multi-count indictment Wednesday in a press conference announcing the arrest,"

I suppose that is an invitation to a jail rape joke.

But anyway, will this man get the same justice he'd get for posting a pic of a nobody online? If so, I'm glad.

Posted by: Dustin at October 12, 2011 01:54 PM (fF625)

The world is safe for democracy again, or something.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, Tea Party SOB at October 12, 2011 01:54 PM (d0Tfm)

14 Without photographic evidence, this thread is null and void.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at October 12, 2011 01:54 PM (VGBuo)

15 Who went to jail for sharing the Wiener pics? Oh that's right, the idiot sent them.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 01:55 PM (ZDUD4)

16 I saw the pictures and let me say, he needs jail time for not getting close ups of her front bottom. Now, she is hot and I'd happily break her down like a shotgun and pull her on like a boot (he says nervously looking around for the wife) but the pictures did NOT SHOW ENOUGH! Off with his head!

Posted by: Sgt. Fury at October 12, 2011 01:55 PM (ONGHB)

17 I found the pics online. They seem pretty harmless.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 01:56 PM (ieDPL)

18 Free Mumia Chaney!

Posted by: Bumper Sticker on a Prius at October 12, 2011 01:57 PM (ErTq7)

19
We need him on that wall.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at October 12, 2011 01:57 PM (QMtmy)

20 Sgt. Fury, the guy didn't take the pics himself. He just grabbed whatever ScarJo had on her phone. Can't blame him for that.

Posted by: EC at October 12, 2011 01:57 PM (R15UB)

21 I thought I was the lone wolf? No fair!

Posted by: Barry XVI at October 12, 2011 01:58 PM (FcR7P)

22 I for one, welcome our hot, bathroom mirror pic taking overlords.

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 01:58 PM (66gFW)

23 No link to pics? Really? What have we become...

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 05:51 PM (66gFW)

It's creeping Socialism. I fear for the future of the Republic.

Actually, I keed, I have no clue.

Is she perky?

Posted by: ErikW at October 12, 2011 01:58 PM (ttNrU)

I saw the pictures and let me say, he needs jail time for not getting close ups of her front bottom.

This is obligatory in this neck of the woods: link, please?

Even if you have to send it with smoke signals.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, Tea Party SOB at October 12, 2011 01:58 PM (d0Tfm)

25 I hope I did help this kid pay his college tuition.

Posted by: dr kill at October 12, 2011 01:58 PM (le5qc)

26 This guy hacks phones so much better than Rupert Murdoch. Who wants to see naked pics of the Queen? Blech!

Posted by: Jordan at October 12, 2011 01:59 PM (XJYf4)

27 O/T: Any word on that big senate meeting? No leaks? Where's Leahy when we need him.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at October 12, 2011 02:00 PM (VGBuo)

28 What happened to her cheekbones (the ones on her face, morons)? The one thing about her that stood out (shut up!) was that she didn't have that typical look. She was kinda cute, but also, not. Now, she just looks like every other bimbo in Hollywood. Bleh.

Posted by: BurtTC at October 12, 2011 02:01 PM (Gc/Qi)

29 Fap! Fap! Fap! Wha???

Posted by: guy looking at the stolen nude pics at October 12, 2011 02:01 PM (90BnA)

30 Can't blame him for that.

Posted by: EC at October 12, 2011 05:57 PM (R15UB)

This is the fantasy of a lifetime and now you want to be all logical and shit? I know there were really good close ups of her flower at all kinds of angles, glistening and whatnot! I know it! Why'd he keep them to himself. Why? Throw the book at his selfish ass...

Posted by: Sgt. Fury at October 12, 2011 02:02 PM (ONGHB)

31 Was this hack orchestrated by Ahmedinejad? That's what the Senate is trying to determine right now from the pictures.

Posted by: t-bird at October 12, 2011 02:02 PM (FcR7P)

I found the pics online. They seem pretty harmless.

Please see comment #25, if for no other reason than tomorrow's my birthday and I've already started celebrating.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, Tea Party SOB at October 12, 2011 02:02 PM (d0Tfm)

33 They caught this guy pretty fast.High priority.

Posted by: steevy at October 12, 2011 02:07 PM (fyOgS)

Note how fast they have found, and shut down, this guy...

Yet Wiki Leaks? and all those Leaks from the Pentagon about Bush stuff? Never seem to be found or prosecuted...

I begin to tire of this Kabuki Theatre they call the Justice Department.

Posted by: Romeo13 at October 12, 2011 02:07 PM (NtXW4)

35 Arrested... to give him a surprise ticker tape parade?

Posted by: fb at October 12, 2011 02:08 PM (JVEmw)

36 I hope they send the MF to hardcore jail for years. I want hackers and assholes who send out the fake internet scan virus to get ass-raped daily for at least a year.

Posted by: Vic at October 12, 2011 02:10 PM (M9Ie6)

37 Yawn................

Posted by: Tami-Cardinals! at October 12, 2011 02:11 PM (X6akg)

38 37, Yeah, Dats right, I gonna make sho he be good an tickered.

Posted by: Tyrone #42678194 at October 12, 2011 02:11 PM (ZDUD4)

39 Google it man.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 02:11 PM (ieDPL)

40 Frankly, I don't give a damn.

Posted by: USS Diversity at October 12, 2011 02:12 PM (aD5Kx)

41 Vic! Dude! Decaf?

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 02:13 PM (66gFW)

42 You know, if everyone who rubbed one out to those pics offered to do a minute of jail time for this guy he could commit crimes the rest of his life and never use up his free minutes.

Social justice DEMANDs distribution of the penalty amongst the guilty and innocent alike.

Posted by: Voluble at October 12, 2011 02:14 PM (JKX4x)

I begin to tire of this Kabuki Theatre they call the Justice Department.

Posted by: Romeo13 at October 12, 2011 06:07 PM (NtXW4)

Yeah but look on the bright side. Holder might one day get cancer, so that's something to look forward to.

Posted by: ErikW at October 12, 2011 02:16 PM (ttNrU)

44 And I hope it's lymphoma, that shit is really nasty.

Posted by: ErikW at October 12, 2011 02:18 PM (ttNrU)

45 I'm thinking of starting a comedy club that features only naked female comedians.

I'm calling it 'Titters.'

Posted by: nickless at October 12, 2011 02:18 PM (MMC8r)

Hmmm...

The article says the cops/prosecuters said that "the celbrity status of the victim(s) played no part in this prosecution."

Riiiiiiight........

Posted by: ed at October 12, 2011 02:19 PM (Y2WVW)

47 Yeah but look on the bright side. Holder might one day get cancer, so that's something to look forward to. When I was in my twenties I made a joke comparing and individual to a downs syndrom child. Little did I know, one of the gentleman I was speaking to had a child with downs. Now I have a special needs child of my own. What's my point? The shit boomerangs dude, be careful.

Posted by: Tyrone #42678194 at October 12, 2011 02:20 PM (ZDUD4)

48 29 O/T: Any word on that big senate meeting? No leaks? Where's Leahy when we need him.
____________

Freepers are saying that Sen. Feinstein tweeted that she left the meeting with no doubt that the Iranian Quds force was behind the plot.

Don't know Feinstein's twitter handle and wouldn't want to hit twitter at work even if I did, so I can't verify.

Posted by: Eric Holder at October 12, 2011 02:20 PM (IrbU4)

49 Darn the sock.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 02:21 PM (ZDUD4)

50 Speaking of darn socks...

Posted by: Anachronda at October 12, 2011 02:21 PM (IrbU4)

51 So because some celebrities are too stupid to keep there phones secure and take nudie pics with them (instead of normal cameras) we have to waste federal resources chasing their hackers?

Fuck her sorry liberal ass.

Posted by: logprof at October 12, 2011 02:22 PM (QaKuj)

52 I demand that all evidence presented in this case be made public and easily accessible for anyone with an internet connection!

Posted by: Johnny at October 12, 2011 02:22 PM (jTasq)

53 Sen. Feinstein tweeted that she left the meeting with no doubt that the Iranian Quds force was behind the plot. What'd she she about the attacks along our border? Where are those weapons coming from?

Posted by: t-bird at October 12, 2011 02:24 PM (FcR7P)

54 So because some celebrities are too stupid to keep there phones secure and take nudie pics with them (instead of normal cameras) we have to waste federal resources chasing their hackers? Fuck her sorry liberal ass. THIS^^^^^^^

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 02:24 PM (ZDUD4)

55 Will the pics come out in the trial.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 02:25 PM (ieDPL)

56 The shit boomerangs dude, be careful.

Posted by: Tyrone #42678194 at October 12, 2011 06:20 PM (ZDUD4)

Yes it does. These cocksuckers would forcefully kill your child in utero if they found out your child had Down's. It's what they do.

Posted by: ErikW at October 12, 2011 02:25 PM (ttNrU)

57 53 Fuck her sorry liberal ass. Yes.Repeatedly.Like a VIKING.

Posted by: steevy at October 12, 2011 02:25 PM (fyOgS)

58 57, I have seen the pics. Google porn tube and you will see bigger, better and more perfect.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 02:26 PM (ZDUD4)

59 Has anyone noticed that the OWS demonstrations are happening mostly in blue cities? There's a statement to be made here.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at October 12, 2011 02:26 PM (VGBuo)

60 My 20 year son's felt Scarlett brought this on by never being completely nude in a movie. According to my son she has obligation to be nude in a movie at least once.

Posted by: long island at October 12, 2011 02:27 PM (TiURi)

61 First they came for the Scarlett Johansson nude photo hacker, and I did nothing...

Well, almost nothing.

Posted by: Not Drinking Nearly Enough at October 12, 2011 02:27 PM (HtUdo)

62 A story about what the dude actually allegedly did would be nice. Even as a semi-dork, there's a procedural gap between dude being some nerd in Florida thinking "Shit, it'd be cool if I could get dem noodz off ScarJo's phone" and him going "OK, got 'em!" that I don't understand how to fill in with mere h4xoring.

I mean, I understand how to get teh noodz. That's not difficult. But it takes more than a nerd wanting teh noodz and being a nerd to get teh noodz into the nerd's hands. ...I think.

Assy knoll!

Posted by: oblig. at October 12, 2011 02:28 PM (cePv8)

63 "I demand that all evidence presented in this case be made public and easily accessible for anyone with an internet connection!"

Done!

Posted by: Teh Internets at October 12, 2011 02:28 PM (/AHDz)

64 61, The statement is, we need to help them. If they want to be destructive, don't force them to look hard for the tools. Step in, be a friend, then run like hell when the SHTF.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 02:29 PM (ZDUD4)

65 62 My 20 year son's felt Scarlett brought this on by never being completely nude in a movie. According to my son she has obligation to be nude in a movie at least once.

Posted by: long island at October 12, 2011 06:27 PM (TiURi)

--She was "tastefully" nude on the cover of Vanity Fair.

Posted by: logprof at October 12, 2011 02:29 PM (QaKuj)

66 Blog is loading slow man.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 02:30 PM (ieDPL)

67 Decaf?

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 06:13 PM (66gFW)

If you ever get hit by one of those scan viruses you'll be ready to see them get ass-raped as well.

Posted by: Vic at October 12, 2011 02:31 PM (M9Ie6)

68 Boo!!! We, the 99 percent, demand more boobehs!!!

Posted by: RINO Repellent at October 12, 2011 02:31 PM (DMxvZ)

69 somebody hacked it

Posted by: USS Diversity at October 12, 2011 02:32 PM (aD5Kx)

70 --She was "tastefully" nude on the cover of Vanity Fair.

Apparently for my son it wasn't enough.

Posted by: long island at October 12, 2011 02:33 PM (TiURi)

71 Blog is loading slow man.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 06:30 PM (ieDPL)

I know. I keep hitting refresh to see a new thread, but it keeps bringing me back to this one.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at October 12, 2011 02:34 PM (VGBuo)

72 68 All better now.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 02:35 PM (ieDPL)

73 69 Decaf?

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 06:13 PM (66gFW)

If you ever get hit by one of those scan viruses you'll be ready to see them get ass-raped as well.

Posted by: Vic at October 12, 2011 06:31 PM (M9Ie6)

LOL... you have NO idea how good those virus's have been for my startup IT business....

Sorry for your pain.... but... if'n its a Microsoft product? Restore is your friend...

Posted by: Romeo13 at October 12, 2011 02:37 PM (NtXW4)

74 Has anyone noticed that the OWS demonstrations are happening mostly in blue cities? There's a statement to be made here. Mom wouldn't drive us. That was the statement.

Posted by: The 99% at October 12, 2011 02:38 PM (FcR7P)

75 Maybe Ace has instituted a new 100 comment per thread rule. No new threads till you hit 100. Prolly not though, or we would still be on the sunday morning book thread.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at October 12, 2011 02:38 PM (ZDUD4)

76 Does she have any talent? Has anyone seen her in anything where she could actually act? I've only seen her in some horrible Woody Allen dreck and she was horrible.

Posted by: mike at October 12, 2011 02:38 PM (sRSZU)

77 Back things up ever wonst in a while.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 02:39 PM (ieDPL)

78 The thought that these are now Sean Penn's funbags is a boner deflater.

Posted by: mike at October 12, 2011 02:39 PM (sRSZU)

79 68 Blog is loading slow man.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at October 12, 2011 06:30 PM (ieDPL)

Been a long slow blog day all day long.

Posted by: Killerdog at October 12, 2011 02:40 PM (CZrbJ)

80 Did you see Google's banner by clicking on 65? Probably just a coincidence that we have a celebration of infantilism in all the Occupations and a Gumby celebration on Google. (Admittedly, it's a lot cooler than a doodle.)

Posted by: t-bird at October 12, 2011 02:42 PM (FcR7P)

81 77 Maybe Ace has instituted a new 100 comment per thread rule. No new threads till you hit 100.
_________

100 comments
Banhammer lurks overhead
'Til new thread arrives

Posted by: Anachronda at October 12, 2011 02:43 PM (xGZ+b)

82 Lets

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:44 PM (rwu/6)

83 Post

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:44 PM (rwu/6)

84 100

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:45 PM (rwu/6)

85 Comments

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:45 PM (rwu/6)

86 So

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:45 PM (rwu/6)

87 Great post!

Posted by: Phoning It In at October 12, 2011 02:45 PM (toCEh)

88 We

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:46 PM (rwu/6)

89 I realize the hacking aspect of this has significance but I couldn't care less what happens to Scarlett Johansson or any of Hollywood's other self-centered twits, for that matter.

Posted by: Soap MacTavish at October 12, 2011 06:42 PM (vbh31)

This. How about they stop being so self absorbed that they don't have nude pics of themselves on their phones.

Posted by: Tami-Cardinals! at October 12, 2011 02:46 PM (X6akg)

90 Can get a new post

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:46 PM (rwu/6)

twits, for that matter.

wrong vowel

Posted by: USS Diversity at October 12, 2011 02:47 PM (aD5Kx)

92 I used to be a crusading hero of ass, but then I got married and had to stop.

Posted by: sifty at October 12, 2011 02:47 PM (4CSeG)

Iran endorsed the Occupy Wall Street group today!

{The ayatollah commended the Occupy Wall Street protests in New York, Washington and other American cities, calling them a consequence of Â“the prevalence of top-level corruption, poverty and social inequality in America.Â” He denounced what he called Â“the heavy-handed treatment of the demonstrators by U.S. officialsÂ” and said that such treatment Â“is not seen even in underdeveloped countries with dictatorial regimes.Â”

Â“They may crack down on this movement but cannot uproot it,Â” Ayatollah Khamenei said. Â“Ultimately, it will grow so that it will bring down the capitalist system and the West.Â”} - NYTimes - no tinyurl for you. Too much fuckin' work!

Posted by: JDW at October 12, 2011 02:48 PM (9Q2Pi)

94 My heart sank when I saw that one of his names was jaxjaguars911, it's bad enough that we are 1 and 4.

Posted by: jags fan at October 12, 2011 02:49 PM (4nxhP)

95 I used to be a crusader of ass, but then women saw me debate.

Posted by: Rick Perry at October 12, 2011 02:49 PM (toCEh)

96 OT. Hmmm dinnerjacket says terror Plot is a lie....

Posted by: phoenixgirl at October 12, 2011 02:49 PM (rwu/6)

97 Vic, I was just teasing because you were putting evil virus makers in the same punishment boat as the guy who posts barely nude bathroom mirror pics of someone who makes a living off needing people to want to see her naked. That guy's punishment should be 20hours of high fives.

Posted by: Terry at October 12, 2011 02:49 PM (66gFW)

98

"The truth is on the march, and nothing shall stop it!"

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at October 12, 2011 02:50 PM (/qkBU)

99 New post.

Posted by: Rick Perry at October 12, 2011 02:51 PM (toCEh)

100 Mitt Romney once had his manservant google the term crusading hero of ass.

He did not like the results and promptly fired the poor chap.

Posted by: sifty at October 12, 2011 02:52 PM (4CSeG)

101 18 I found the pics online. They seem pretty harmless.

Yeah, pretty tasteful and soft-core stuff. I can understand the principle of the pics belonging to her and the wrong in her privacy being invaded, but she's certainly got nothing to be ashamed of. As left wing as she is, damn that girl is fine.

Posted by: Reggie1971 at October 12, 2011 02:57 PM (0DGtF)

102 I think the last movie I saw was United 93 in 2006. I despise Hollywood, but that's just me.

Posted by: Soap MacTavish at October 12, 2011 06:49 PM (vbh31)

I detest Hollywood as well and the last pic I saw in a theater was Mission:Impossible.

I watched Flight 93 on cable and it was good. Tough but good.

Posted by: ErikW at October 12, 2011 02:57 PM (ttNrU)

103 I was just teasing because you were putting evil virus makers in the same punishment boat as the guy who posts barely nude bathroom mirror pics of someone who makes a living off needing people to want to see her naked.

It sends the wrong message to hackers for people to laugh it off. To me hacking someones computer, be it home or portable, to steal private nude photos should be the same thing as peaking in bedroom windows.

Doing what this guy did is the same as shooting pictures in bedroom windows and distributing them.

FK him

Posted by: Vic at October 12, 2011 03:02 PM (M9Ie6)

104 I can't believe they caught this guy already! When are they ever going to bring Representative Weiner's hacker to justice?

Posted by: Dum Dum Dishonest Clod Seattle Slog at October 12, 2011 03:48 PM (Lbb9+)

105 This story gives the term schadenboner a whole new meaning.

Posted by: The Regular Guy at October 12, 2011 03:52 PM (nov+8)

106 So when is the media going to claim this guy is related to Dick Chaney?

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at October 12, 2011 04:09 PM (i0App)

107

That is useful information and its quite easy to come a croper if you are not vigilant.

Posted by: Helen Oyeyemi Mr. Fox ePub at October 12, 2011 04:46 PM (X8xUj)

108
Thanks for sharing, please keep an update about this info. love to read it more. i like this site too much.

Posted by: Into the Silence epub at October 12, 2011 06:06 PM (DBLIh)

109 Whats with this chick anyway? I swear you could look at 100 different pics, and think you're looking at 100 different people. She doesn't even look similar in many pics. Like serious fake nose and shit

Some major pancake action

Posted by: Governor Moon Beaner at October 12, 2011 06:34 PM (LqEzN)

110 I was very happy to search out this web-site.I needed to thanks to your time for this excellent read!! I definitely enjoying each little little bit of it and I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you weblog post.

Posted by: My Song AudioBook at October 12, 2011 06:36 PM (XZ+yh)

111

That is useful information and its quite easy to come a croper if you are not vigilant.

Posted by: Rise of The Governor ePub at October 12, 2011 06:52 PM (UY7HL)

112
Scarlett Johansson: skank.

Proof: she let Sean Penn put his peen in her vajayjay.

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie © at October 12, 2011 08:00 PM (cYzZf)

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