Ace of Spades HQ

December 31, 2011

Freshy-Fresh New Year's Post
— LauraW

So fresh, this story is from tomorrow!
Australia has already seen the New Year. So it will be old and slimy and covered with the webs of poisonous spiders by the time it gets to us. Bastards!

On the other hand, it takes four people to subdue a snake there. Yeesh.

"It was like any other night, half an hour of playtime before bed," Ms Sullivan told The Sunday Mail.
"We were throwing a ball to each other and it rolled behind me, so Kye went to pick it up.
"He then let out that horrible scream where you know something is very, very wrong.
"By the time I got to him, and we are talking a second or two, the snake had latched on to his foot."

The foiled snake then turned on the kid's father and neighbors had to help extricate him.

Kye was then transported to Cairns Base Hospital but he began throwing up, his heart rate dropped and he stopped breathing during the one-hour trip. He was revived using oxygen and was wrapped in a heat blanket.
Cairns doctors took swabs of Kye's wounds and did X-rays to ensure the python's vice-like grip hadn't broken any ribs. Both tests came back negative. Kye was discharged the next day, nursing four bite marks and bruising on his lower left leg.
"We didn't spend that first night at home," Ms Sullivan said. "We stopped in to get clothes but the kids wouldn't get out of the car, so we stayed at my mum's."

Yeah, no kidding. If I lived in Australia I'd probably do that 'don't let your feet ever touch the ground' game that a lot of house cats play.

If you go to the article link, you'll see that this story has an unhappy ending.

Posted by: LauraW at 12:23 PM | Comments (377)
Post contains 307 words, total size 2 kb.

1 First!

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 12:26 PM (F26bS)

Heh.

Happy New Years, Moron/ettes!

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 12:26 PM (F26bS)

3 Fun fact: In Canada, New Year's Day is actually one month later, since Canada is still trying to figure out how to measure days using the calendar, instead of the sundial.

Posted by: Joffen at December 31, 2011 12:30 PM (zLeKL)

4 Not even...we tell time by when the igloos melt...

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 12:31 PM (F26bS)

5 The igloos actually melt? I thought they stayed frozen year-round...

Posted by: Joffen at December 31, 2011 12:32 PM (zLeKL)

6 Released into the rain forest? That frigging snake should have been cut in half with a shotgun.

Posted by: Berserker at December 31, 2011 12:34 PM (FMbng)

7 Well, farther up north they do...I'm pretty close to the border so we have to swich to teepees in spring...

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 12:34 PM (F26bS)

It would have been a happy ending if they said bye bye obama.

Happy New Year everyone!

Posted by: PugBoo at December 31, 2011 12:34 PM (Q5fHc)

9 CanaDave, close to the border? Where?

Posted by: Joffen at December 31, 2011 12:35 PM (zLeKL)

10 Berserker, I know!

I think if it were a mammal they would never have let it live after attacking a human.

Posted by: lauraw at December 31, 2011 12:35 PM (DbybK)

11 The Aussies have it rough. What with giant spiders, man eating snakes, and being upside-down and all.

Posted by: kartoffel at December 31, 2011 12:36 PM (uEmgg)

12 Snakes...... why did it have to be snakes?

Posted by: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Fosters at December 31, 2011 12:37 PM (gCa4h)

13 The kids wouldn't leave the car because they know that the murderous snakes all get turned loose.
_{Kinda like the penal system in California.}

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 12:38 PM (HBqDo)

14 They let the snake go?

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 12:41 PM (SsG4J)

15 They let the snake go?

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 04:41 PM (SsG4J)

Not on my lawn!

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 12:43 PM (i3+c5)

16 In a follow up to the story, the family was arrested for environmental tampering. A barrister was also appointed to represent Bitey as plaintiff in a civil action.

Posted by: er at December 31, 2011 12:43 PM (i421Q)

17 Did you know the lobster and butter shooters are awesome in Hawaii? Have a great New Year's Eve!

Posted by: Marie O at December 31, 2011 12:43 PM (6Cjut)

18 Happy and healthy new year to you all. Our collective insanity has made dealing with past 3 years of alternate reality bearable. Big year ahead!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at December 31, 2011 12:45 PM (UlUS4)

19 Is it just me, or did anyone else not know that one of the main buildings in the Red Square is actually a huge department store?

Posted by: Joffen at December 31, 2011 12:45 PM (zLeKL)

20 Okay, now wait a minute. The snake got her baby, then it got her husband and this woman didn't get a knife and start cutting???

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 12:46 PM (SsG4J)

21 I would have made a purse out of that snake.

Posted by: mpfs at December 31, 2011 12:47 PM (DsEXW)

22 I would have made shoes out of that snake. Well, at least one shoe.

Posted by: Marie O at December 31, 2011 12:48 PM (6Cjut)

23 Sucking down shrimp cocktail and tortilla chips with spicy white "queso". And beer. And a little later, whiskey...

Posted by: Lincolntf at December 31, 2011 12:49 PM (Qjh0I)

24 Posted by: Joffen at December 31, 2011 04:30 PM (zLeKL)

It's winter in Canada. There ARE no days.

Posted by: Shannow at December 31, 2011 12:49 PM (ozR6r)

25 If I lived in Australia I'd probably do that 'don't let your feet ever touch the ground' game that a lot of house cats play.

I'm relatively certain that in Australia there will be something that flies that could still get you.

Posted by: alexthechick at December 31, 2011 12:50 PM (Gk3SS)

26 Serious Question: What is the Dem/Liberal reason to vote FOR Obama in 2012?

With that track record of failure (by any real-world metric), incompetent staff full of bad-hires, divisive style of governing. Why am I supposed to vote for him?

Posted by: (Famous Original) My Sharia Moor at December 31, 2011 12:50 PM (KZi9D)

27 Python? More like a Dick Cheney snakeskin condom.

Posted by: nickless at December 31, 2011 12:50 PM (MMC8r)

28 The snake was 13 feet long. Y'all could have had several handbags, and shoes, and I coulda had a pair of boots.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 12:50 PM (SsG4J)

29 Happy New Year to morons and ettes everywhere. And a special Happy New Year to Ace and his band of merry co-bloggers. Happy hobo hunting tonight.

Posted by: USA at December 31, 2011 12:51 PM (6Cjut)

30 A barrister was also appointed to represent Bitey as plaintiff in a civil action.

Posted by: er at December 31, 2011 04:43 PM (i421Q)

Don't know for sure, but this would make sense: "The barrister will be paid by PETA. The basis of the civil suit is that the family denied food to the hungry snake. "

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 12:52 PM (i3+c5)

31 With that track record of failure (by any real-world metric), incompetent staff full of bad-hires, divisive style of governing. Why am I supposed to vote for him? Seriously? I ask my liberal friends/co-workers that all the time and they can't give me an answer. So...

Posted by: Joffen at December 31, 2011 12:52 PM (zLeKL)

32 4m is 12 feet. That's enough snake to furnish your whole family with shoes, purses and enough pants for a Jim Morrison retrospect. F'n hippies. Story SHOULD HAVE ended with "Kyle was overheard to say it "tastes like chicken".

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 12:54 PM (sOd/c)

33 Posted by: (Famous Original) My Sharia Moor at December 31, 2011 04:50 PM (KZi9D)
Bad question because its premise is that Dems/Liberals are capable of using real world metrics rather than the classical Marxist metrics of increased government power and decreased personal freedom.

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 12:55 PM (i3+c5)

34
What a bunch of pussies. I would have slept with the snake.

Posted by: Zombie Steve Irwin at December 31, 2011 12:56 PM (TkGkA)

35 Story SHOULD HAVE ended with "Kyle was overheard to say it "tastes like chicken".

Thank you.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 12:57 PM (SsG4J)

Why am I supposed to vote for him?

Because you're an evil heartless racist if you don't. I expect they'll have that one turned to 11 by September/October.

Posted by: kartoffel at December 31, 2011 12:58 PM (uEmgg)

37 Happy New Year's from Italy! One hour away from the witching hour and I may not make it, I'm so tired!

Posted by: Auntie Doodles at December 31, 2011 12:58 PM (Vl8Hu)

38 The only good snake is a dead snake. That's just me.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 12:59 PM (JGYCE)

39 Happy New Year, Auntie Doodles!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 12:59 PM (SsG4J)

@37

Chow!

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:00 PM (HPcQF)

41 I don't know about making shoes and purses with that snake. If it had been me, there wouldn't have been any pieces bigger than about an inch by the time I was done chopping.

Posted by: Retread at December 31, 2011 01:00 PM (joSBv)

My democrat associates are emotionally and psychologically incapable of holding Obama accountable for anything bad that happens or has happened. Incapable. All they know is that as much as he loves giving them handouts that his heart is obviously in the right place. With an unemployment rate of like 25% why would a black person ever vote for someone who supports open borders? R**e??

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 01:01 PM (sOd/c)

43 The only good snake is a dead snake. That's just me.

I am live and let live if they're not poisonous, and even then, if it's a water snake and stays by the water, I will leave it be.

But 13 effing feet long needs to be killed, especially if it has got ahold of my two year old child.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:02 PM (SsG4J)

44 "Ms Sullivan said she asked staff to swab for venom, but was told they didn't have the authority to do that. "They told me they didn't have the authority to do any swab tests any more, which is strange because we get a lot of snakes up here," she said." Gee. Sounds an awful lot like the States, dontcha think?

Posted by: NukemHill at December 31, 2011 01:02 PM (7WLzC)

45 Happy New year bitey. You are one lucky ass damn snake because if you had been in my yard you would be snake mush. A 12 gauge shotgun will do wonders on bitey snakey.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 01:02 PM (YdQQY)

46 I wold never set foot in that house again and would flee the entire country. When my boys were little we almost relocated to Australia for five years and tax free dollars with husband's job. I did not want to leave our families that long, and also learned of the poisonous spiders, etc which freaked me out. While Floriduh is bad enough for critters and these damn pythons popping up in toilets, I will take my chances here. God love the Aussies, they are a brave lot.

Happy New Year, Morons and "ettes. This year has been a horrible one for me and I am ready to kick 2011 to the curb.

May Obama be beat in November. That is my greatest wish, after health and happiness for my family.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 01:03 PM (baL2B)

47 14 They let the snake go?

Yes, but he has to wear a radio ankle bracelet. Barack Obama is considering this approach in the West for rattlers.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:04 PM (6TB1Z)

48 I wonder if snakes develop a "taste for humans"?

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 01:04 PM (sOd/c)

My grandpa, and old, crusty, Depression-era farmer, used to take a rake and knock'em out of the tree onto the ground and then stomp the slithery bastards to death. He used to tell me when he was working the mules pulling a plow in the spring he would turn up snakes pretty much every row he plowed.

I'll never even approach that level of toughness and fearlessness.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:06 PM (HPcQF)

50 A 12 gauge shotgun will do wonders on bitey snakey.

I believe most of them have a frappe button, don't they?

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:06 PM (6TB1Z)

51 Yes, but he has to wear a radio ankle bracelet.

LOL!

Barack Obama is considering this approach in the West for rattlers Conservatives.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:06 PM (SsG4J)

Tammy, I sometimes have lots of garter snakes in the yard. I don't kill them even after they scare the crap out of me. I would rather they lived somewhere else.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 01:07 PM (JGYCE)

53 I'll never even approach that level of toughness and fearlessness.

Probably not, but then I'm sure that 21st century men have it all over them in the expressive wrists department.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:07 PM (6TB1Z)

54 The foiled snake then turned on the kid's father and neighbors had to help extricate him. Wait. The snake was wearing a tinfoil cap?

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 01:07 PM (niZvt)

@54

It's pathetic how pussified we've become, me absolutlely included.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:09 PM (HPcQF)

56 Happy New Years Morons/ettes. Starting e-cig tomorrow. I hope I am successful in quitting. Wife has been done smoking for a week and now I want to quit. Start new job in March. Looking forward to '12.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at December 31, 2011 01:10 PM (jucos)

57 IM IN UR HOUSE SQZUIN UR KIDS

Posted by: the snake at December 31, 2011 01:10 PM (GTbGH)

58 And more people learn that humans aren't really that much of a "threat" to nature.

Posted by: Fa Cube Itches at December 31, 2011 01:11 PM (2xfbm)

59 Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 05:07 PM (JGYCE)

Good for you! They keep mice and such down, you know.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:11 PM (SsG4J)

@57

Care to share which e-cig you chose and why?

I am considering it myself.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:11 PM (HPcQF)

61 Pythons, pffft! Ever watch the dead Aussie Croc guy let the most venomous snake in the world crawl under his shirt? THAT TAKES BALLS. Oh and a camera man is right beside him filming it all.

Posted by: Mike Hunt at December 31, 2011 01:11 PM (G6kli)

62 ugh......i live in the desert..........we have wild goats, javelinas, coyotes (the animal kind) tarantulas, scorpions and of course snakes......rattlers.......about 4 yrs ago my truck was in the driveway and the kids were getting in and my youngest daughter almost stepped on a rattler.....she didn't see it but her brother did who screamed bloody murder.....thank God the garden loppers were right there.....i grabbed them and lopped it's f'n head 3/4's of the way off.......then flung the damn thing on to the mountain.....i hate snakes

Posted by: phoenixgirl all in for perry at December 31, 2011 01:13 PM (Ho2rs)

63 I am going to the store in a bit to buy e-cig. Don't know the brand name. Wife quit using Chantix

Posted by: Truck Monkey at December 31, 2011 01:13 PM (jucos)

64 A few year ago, an elderly lady in the US went outside to find a python eating her little dog. Does she run inside and grab the largest kitchen knife she has and stab the muthafucker to death? No. She grabs her camera and memorializes in a series of pixs her little dog terrified as it is being swallowed alive and whole. I just found that fucked up.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:17 PM (iTfHR)

65 We have every kind of poisonous critter that exists in the US here in SC. From what I hear we also have a new batch of poisonous spiders headed in from South America as well. These are the Brown Widow and Red Widow spiders.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 01:17 PM (YdQQY)

66 IM IN UR HOUSE SQZUIN UR KIDS

Posted by: the snake at December 31, 2011 05:10 PM (GTbGH)

Some moron got drunk and dislodged the cover to the Python's cage and it killed the girlfriends 2yr old toddler in the night

They're doing a dozen rent free years for murder 3

Posted by: Beto Ochoa at December 31, 2011 01:17 PM (lpWVn)

67 thank God the garden loppers were right there.....i grabbed them and lopped it's f'n head 3/4's of the way off

See, this is what I mean. I get that she couldn't use a lopper on a 12 ft snake, but she could've started in cuttting on it while calling for help.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:17 PM (SsG4J)

68 I believe we should kill anything that tries to kill and eat us. For example: bears mtn lions sharks bears bears bears

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:19 PM (iTfHR)

69 Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 05:17 PM (iTfHR)
Any guesses as to how she voted last time out?

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 01:19 PM (i3+c5)

70 We have every kind of poisonous critter that exists in the US here in SC

Ditto Arkansas. Southerners gotta be tough.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:20 PM (SsG4J)

71 If you stab a big snake, will it release it's prey??

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:21 PM (iTfHR)

72 Wait.

The snake was wearing a tinfoil cap?

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 05:07 PM (niZvt)

Coast to Coast AM is worldwide dude. Worldwide.

Posted by: Beto Ochoa at December 31, 2011 01:21 PM (lpWVn)

73 6 Poor little Kye should have at least gotten a new pair of python boots or a belt out of the deal.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 01:21 PM (mjR67)

Concerned that SOME measures be taken in order to remove any potential poisons transmitted by the snakebite, Kyle won the Youngest Ever award and international acclaim by exclaiming to his mother "It won't suck itself..."

*See what I did there?*

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 01:22 PM (sOd/c)

75 Posted by: mike
If you cut it in half it does.

Posted by: Lincolntf at December 31, 2011 01:22 PM (Qjh0I)

76 i hate snakes

/high-five

Posted by: Dr. Henry Jones at December 31, 2011 01:22 PM (jbVeA)

77 19 Is it just me, or did anyone else not know that one of the main buildings in the Red Square is actually a huge department store? Posted by: Joffen

It's not fair for me to answer that, because my major (back in the mists of time) was Soviet Studies. Yes, I knew that.

But I bet if you asked 10 people at random, they'd just stare at you.

Posted by: Dianna at December 31, 2011 01:22 PM (mKMj1)

78 If you stab a big snake, will it release it's prey??

I would think that if you keep slicing it, it would eventually. Anything would be better than sitting there like a useless effing helpless female while the damn thing is about to take your husband's arm off.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:23 PM (SsG4J)

79 See, this is what I mean. I get that she couldn't use a lopper on a 12 ft snake, but she could've started in cuttting on it while calling for help.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 05:17 PM (SsG4J)

This is why every toolshed should have a machete in it. They're cheap and and have a multitude of uses, including snake-chopping.

I've got an eyeball on a KA-BAR Kukri which is a bit pricier and looks almost too pretty to use.

Did I say pretty? Yes, I did.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:23 PM (LVLea)

80 72 If you stab a big snake, will it release it's prey?? Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 05:21 PM (iTfHR) If you stroke mine, it'll release its Second Chakra!

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 01:23 PM (niZvt)

81 Yeah, if Kye had been a good ol' boy he'd be wearing that snake as a hat

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 01:24 PM (sOd/c)

82 >>>If you cut it in half it does. Might need an axe handy for that.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:24 PM (iTfHR)

83 78 19 Is it just me, or did anyone else not know that one of the main buildings in the Red Square is actually a huge department store? Posted by: Joffen Are you talking about GUM?

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:24 PM (6TB1Z)

84 Why would you want to kill a bear? Bears don't intentionally cause humans harm.

Posted by: Timothy Treadwell at December 31, 2011 01:25 PM (jucos)

85 Nah, I think that alexthechick is wrong. I'm pretty sure that they don't have birds in Australia... Not native, anywise. Something to do with evolution and the fact that gravity is way heavier near the South Pole. Sure they have bats and shit but even the budgies (parakeets to you and me) are imported from New Zealand. And if you wonder why the Australia doesn't have birds but New Zealand does... Maori, haka

Posted by: Deety just makin' shit up at December 31, 2011 01:25 PM (RvDoQ)

86 Give me the freezing cold of Canada any day over poisonous spiders and assorted bitey things.

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 01:25 PM (F26bS)

@85

You're kidding right?

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (HPcQF)

88 KC and The Sunshine Band for halftime? WTF?

KC looks like he swallowed some live bacon whole.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (HBqDo)

89 I just saw an ecology special on black water snakes on the Great Lakes. So, this biology major gal, kind of a big gal, she walks up to a piece of plywood that she had placed there strategically the week before, flings it aside and there are about 20 snakes just a wrigglin'. Lo and behold she starts to grabbing 'em 2 and 3 at a time and stuffing 'em in to sacks. You would have thought they were diamond bracelets or something.

I would not do that on a bet.

Posted by: navybrat at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (54L/F)

Yeah, pythons are a bit beyond the knife-sawing stage. Stabbing doesn't seem like a great idea either, with their tough, slippery hides. I say go for the head area and just start hacking away.

Posted by: Lincolntf at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (Qjh0I)

91 Lived in Houston when I was really young. Can still remember our house, which was 1/2 mile from a bay, and every morning going out to the breezeway and seeing what snake mom had chopped up with her ax. Mom grew up on a dairy farm and she was determined to protect her young'uns.

Posted by: San Antonio Rose at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (nOFwj)

92 Well, you can't use an axe on it effectively while it's wrapped around someone, but ErikW's pretty Kukri might work, even tho I am averse to machetes.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (SsG4J)

93 One thing I always found interesting is that there are no poisionous snakes in Hawaii, or so I've been told.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:26 PM (HPcQF)

94 You need a sword like Conan used in the first movie...

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 01:27 PM (F26bS)

95 The snake was 13 feet long. Y'all could have had several handbags, and shoes, and I coulda had a pair of boots.

Or one First Boob Belt.

_{I denounce myself}

Posted by: Waterhouse at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (jbVeA)

96 The goddam snakes ate all the bird eggs

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (sOd/c)

@90

Hell of a lot better than Madonna.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (HPcQF)

>>Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 05:26 PM (HPcQF)

_{Sock of a Grizzly Lover/Victim}

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (HBqDo)

99 >>>You're kidding right? Check the handle.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (iTfHR)

100 94 You've been misinformed.

Posted by: Barack and Michelle at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (mjR67)

101 Posted by: Waterhouse at December 31, 2011 05:28 PM (jbVeA)

I lol'd!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:28 PM (SsG4J)

102 >slapping forhead<

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:29 PM (HPcQF)

103

that would be >slapping forehead<

damn, only had 4 beers so far

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:29 PM (HPcQF)

104 Are you talking about GUM?

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 05:24 PM (6TB1Z)

That's the one you would assume to be the Kremlin headquarters by it's look.

Posted by: lowandslow at December 31, 2011 01:29 PM (GZitp)

105
There's a reason for Rule 9 (always have a knife with you).

I understand snake tastes like chicken...

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie © at December 31, 2011 01:30 PM (1hM1d)

106 Since Hawaii is just one big lava blob seeping out of the ocean and was never attached to a land mass, why is their anything alive there that didn't arrive by ship or air?

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:30 PM (iTfHR)

107 KC's just relieved that his career isn't stagnating

Posted by: daVE at December 31, 2011 01:30 PM (sOd/c)

108 Well, you can't use an axe on it effectively while it's wrapped around someone, but ErikW's pretty Kukri might work, even tho I am averse to machetes.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 05:26 PM (SsG4J)

Machetes are your friend.

Add a 9 foot coiled leather bullwhip and the badassery is complete.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:30 PM (LVLea)

109 88 @85 Â You're kidding right? Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 05:26 PM (HPcQF) And by "intentionally," he means unless they are hungry, rabid, protecting a cub, in the middle of mating season, feeling protective of their territory, or just momentarily pissed off. Other than that, they're about as agreeable as a starving rat cornered in the freezer of your local Kentucky Fried Rodent.

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 01:30 PM (niZvt)

110 The snake was 13 feet long. Y'all could have had several handbags, and shoes, and I coulda had a pair of boots.

Or one First Boob Belt.

_{I denounce myself}

Posted by: Waterhouse at December 31, 2011 05:28 PM (jbVeA)

WINNAH!

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:31 PM (LVLea)

111

I've used a shovel a couple of times to cut off snakey heads. .....Works pretty good. .....I don't like snakes. There are some 'good' snakes, the ones that aren't venomous and eat lotsa mice and rats. But that doesn't mean I want to cohabitate with the slimey little fuckers.

I think I hate rats more than I hate snakes.

Posted by: wheatie at December 31, 2011 01:31 PM (oPkw3)

112

These are the Brown Widow and Red Widow spiders.

They will interbreed with the Black Widows and we'll be in for a world of hurt.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 01:32 PM (JGYCE)

113 Had a buddy in college who was from the Yellowstone Park area who used to tell me about his bear hunts. What really creeped me out was him telling me how the bears would start tracking and actually hunting hunters. Yowza!

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:32 PM (HPcQF)

114 105 Are you talking about GUM? Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 05:24 PM (6TB1Z) That's the one you would assume to be the Kremlin headquarters by it's look. Posted by: lowandslow at December 31, 2011 05:29 PM (GZitp) Interrogations were down in the bargain basement.

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 01:32 PM (niZvt)

115 Python. Pffft.

Posted by: Jonah at December 31, 2011 01:32 PM (yQwq5)

116 Other than that, they're about as agreeable as a starving rat cornered in the freezer of your local Kentucky Fried Rodent.

Maybe if you assholes were a little more generous with your pic-a-nic baskets ...

Posted by: some bear at December 31, 2011 01:32 PM (jbVeA)

117 How about a taser?

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:33 PM (iTfHR)

118 Machetes are your friend.

Eh, bad experience with one, but I definitely get the appeal!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:33 PM (SsG4J)

119 Interrogations were down in the bargain basement.

Actually, Lubyanka (where interrogations really were down in the basement) was a giant insurance company building that was liberated by Lenin's commies in 1917.

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 31, 2011 01:34 PM (yQwq5)

120 We're reasonably certain that by now any questions about how KC likes it have been fully explored and resolved

Posted by: Liberty Bowl audience at December 31, 2011 01:34 PM (sOd/c)

121 Of course, if you taser a snake, I don't know the effect it would have on the small pet in it's mouth or being squeezed to death.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:35 PM (iTfHR)

122 a pool guy found a diamond back next to our pool......after he removed it and put it in the desert he told me about it....i asked him where he released it exactly and he told me....i ran to get the flat edge shovel and he freaked out.....he said he couldn't stop me from killing it but he wanted me to respect him enough to let him drive away first because he couldn't bare to know that beautiful thing was killed.....i told him he better get going because i couldn't bare having a deadly snake on the property endangering my kids lifes.....i was not able to find it and i never saw that pool guy again.......

Posted by: phoenixgirl all in for perry at December 31, 2011 01:36 PM (Ho2rs)

123 Success! I always wanted to sock Timmy Treadwell.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at December 31, 2011 01:36 PM (jucos)

124 #109 Got a whip/prod from Cold Steel. It is used in Africa to herd cattle, etc. It will seriously hurt you. Keep under my car seat. Second line of defense, in case the gun is not an option.

Posted by: San Antonio Rose at December 31, 2011 01:36 PM (nOFwj)

125 A couple of weeks ago, I was searching the internet for people murdered by bears and notice that they always leave the dick. Bears won't eat it. Why not? Or, maybe they plan to save it for later like a tasty little treat?

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:37 PM (iTfHR)

126 The husband is on his 4th absinthe, has closed out of Guitar Port and is finally going to start playing Skyrim.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:37 PM (SsG4J)

127

@124

Congratufuckulations.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:37 PM (HPcQF)

128 i'd want to kill a bear to get a rug out of it.........

Posted by: phoenixgirl all in for perry at December 31, 2011 01:37 PM (Ho2rs)

129 Eh, bad experience with one, but I definitely get the appeal!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 05:33 PM (SsG4J)

Did you lop off a foot or something?

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:38 PM (LVLea)

130 I read somewhere that our fear of snakes comes from our most primitive part of the brain, a left over from our early evolution days. A whole discussion could be had on the evolutionary development of the types who think pet pythons in the same house with their 2 year olds is a good idea.

Posted by: Jypsea Rose at December 31, 2011 01:38 PM (digkk)

131

I always wanted to sock Timmy Treadwell.

Good feeling, isn't it? Last time I did it someone got all preachy and shit.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 01:38 PM (WHBt7)

132 I guess my wife is a bear

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 01:38 PM (sOd/c)

133 Phoenixgirl I don't know how you do it. We have snakes here and it freaks me out. I've killed Copperheads up in north Texas but rattlers - never.

Posted by: San Antonio Rose at December 31, 2011 01:39 PM (nOFwj)

134 Black Bears aren't a problem, so long as you don't feed them or leave garbage out.
Grizzlies I've read, (none around here) are a different story altogether.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 01:39 PM (HBqDo)

135 A couple of weeks ago, I was searching the internet for people murdered by bears and notice that they always leave the dick. Bears won't eat it. Why not? Or, maybe they plan to save it for later like a tasty little treat?

We take dick!

Posted by: Any Chinese Herbal Medicine Quack at December 31, 2011 01:39 PM (yQwq5)

136 What's all this about pool boys and snakes?

Posted by: Sarah Jessica P at December 31, 2011 01:40 PM (sOd/c)

137

I always wanted to sock Timmy Treadwell.

Now I'm jealous.

Posted by: Rachel Corrie at December 31, 2011 01:40 PM (yQwq5)

138 Hey Tammy al Thor! Happy New Year! What is that absinthe like? I've been dying to try it for about 7 years now. Friend of ours told us some stories about it but...I don't know.

Posted by: Jypsea Rose at December 31, 2011 01:40 PM (digkk)

139 People who have had close encounter with bears say that they all stink. Especially their breaths. Also, they don't make noise when they are killing and eating you. I guess it would be bad manners to do so when their mouths are full with your arms or legs.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:41 PM (iTfHR)

140

123 phoenixgirl,

Ooo, diamond backs are mean and nasty. ....Most rattlers are.

I had a rattler make a nest in our woodpile one time. .....Didn't know it was there. Problem was, the woodpile was right by our dryer vent. ....So the baby rattlers came in the house through the nice warm dryer vent.

Posted by: wheatie at December 31, 2011 01:41 PM (oPkw3)

141 I hate snakes more than anything (well, other than SCOAMF and Co). In Mississippi the cotton-mouths grow to be as wide as a man's thigh (so I was told and I stayed out of creek area until a hard freeze, as they also climb trees). They scare me as well as copperheads and, hey, any snake but a black one (who scares me but I know he won't kill me and they are usually thin). Kill them all.

My late brother, who died suddenly two months ago, was the only person on earth I felt safe with at the lake in the summer. He could calmly just beat a snake to death with a large stick without thinking a thing about it. I miss him for many reasons, but this is one of them.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 01:42 PM (baL2B)

142 Did you lop off a foot or something?

I was putting groceries in my truck and got shoved in from behind by a guy who then cut through my clothes with one.

i'd want to kill a bear to get a rug out of it.........

My kinda girl!!!!!!! jc on the ONT is a bear slayer, you know! And girl, I am a big nature lover, but when nature threatens your family, nature has got to be summarily dealt with, not turned loose.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:42 PM (SsG4J)

143 Good feeling, isn't it? Last time I did it someone got all preachy and shit. Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 05:38 PM (WHBt7) ------------------------------------------- St Pancake is talking to me! Sorry Dave.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at December 31, 2011 01:42 PM (jucos)

144 What really creeped me out was him telling me how the bears would start tracking and actually hunting hunters. Yowza!

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 05:32 PM (HPcQF)

Actually Blacks and even Grizzlies while aggressive don't track and hunt humans, those cute Polar Bears on the other hand will. Nasty bastards.

Posted by: lowandslow at December 31, 2011 01:44 PM (GZitp)

145 I had a rattler make a nest in our woodpile one time. .....Didn't know it was there. Problem was, the woodpile was right by our dryer vent. ....So the baby rattlers came in the house through the nice warm dryer vent.

Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes in this motherfucking dryer!

Posted by: Samuel L. Jackson at December 31, 2011 01:44 PM (yQwq5)

146

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 05:42 PM (SsG4J)

Oh shit, sorry Tammy.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:44 PM (LVLea)

147 >>>Black Bears aren't a problem, so long as you don't feed them or leave garbage out. WRONG! They will break into your house and fuck you up and then eat you. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fatal_bear_attacks_in_North_America

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:45 PM (iTfHR)

148 124 Success! I always wanted to sock Timmy Treadwell.

Funny, I always wanted to eat him.

Posted by: Grizzly with attitude at December 31, 2011 01:45 PM (6TB1Z)

149 Bears and pythons deserve each other

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 01:46 PM (sOd/c)

150 Got a whip/prod from Cold Steel. It is used in Africa to herd cattle, etc. It will seriously hurt you. Keep under my car seat. Second line of defense, in case the gun is not an option.

Posted by: San Antonio Rose at December 31, 2011 05:36 PM (nOFwj)

I checked the website and I like the idea of laying it across the dash. I might just pick one up.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:46 PM (LVLea)

151 Bears were always kind of a curiosity for me. I used to go up to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area every summer when I was a kid. Wasn't 'til I was in high school and a bear ripped through our tents and trashed our gear did I realize what damage they could do. There is a reason the guides tell you not to bring sweets on your trip into the BWCA.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at December 31, 2011 01:46 PM (jucos)

152 Hey, Jypsea!!! It tastes like black licorice to me. I just had a sip, not much of a drinker. Thor hates black licorice, but I bought it for him anyway, because of all the lore surrounding it. And ge loves it! He also says it's a very different kind of buzz. More like drugs than booze.

Happy New Year!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:46 PM (SsG4J)

153

@145

Well then he's a lyin SOB.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:46 PM (HPcQF)

154 >>>Actually Blacks and even Grizzlies while aggressive don't track and hunt humans, There was a recent case where one ate a couple of people and when other campers arrived via river, the bear tried to eat them and chased them in the water and on the banks for at least a half a mile.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:47 PM (iTfHR)

155 Other than that, they're about as agreeable as a starving rat cornered in the freezer of your local Kentucky Fried Rodent. Posted by: CoolCzech

Yeah.

A couple years ago, some poor guy opened his apartment door to go to work, and there was a bear.

I'm still imagining that particular 911 call.

"Sir, have you been drinking?"

Posted by: Dianna at December 31, 2011 01:47 PM (mKMj1)

156 148 124 Success! I always wanted to sock Timmy Treadwell.

Funny, I always wanted to eat him.

Posted by: Grizzly with attitude at December 31, 2011 05:45 PM (6TB1Z)

-------

You liar. ....You ate him all up, and didn't even leave me the dick.

Posted by: Grizzly with attitude's Girlfriend at December 31, 2011 01:48 PM (oPkw3)

157 There was a recent case where one ate a couple of people and when other campers arrived via river, the bear tried to eat them and chased them in the water and on the banks for at least a half a mile.

Actually, I believe that was me.

Posted by: Sasquatch at December 31, 2011 01:49 PM (yQwq5)

158 145 I have heard that bears in heavily hunted areas are no longer fearful of the report of a rifle. They will now go towards it because they have learned that fresh meat may be available.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 01:49 PM (mjR67)

159 From what I can tell, in Australia, you're either poisonous, or you're lunch.

I live in Florida and dream of a place where one can swim without worrying about gators or cottonmouths.

Australia is not that place.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 01:50 PM (piMMO)

160 I grew up in bear country, in AK. Black bears are hilarious. They get into the garbage and spread it all around. I once saw two of them bashing a feather pillow back and forth--looked like snow had come early. Grizzly bears are fine in the fall, but must be avoided like the plague in the spring, when they are hungry. They will eat just about anything and anyone in the spring. In the fall they couldn't give a damn.

Polar bears will hunt you down and eat you for sport. They are the meanest, nastiest of the bunch. By far. They like to hang out in the garbage dumps on the coast, so if you are in Nome, stay out of the dump, unless you are packing.

Posted by: tcn at December 31, 2011 01:50 PM (hQX3k)

161 It's the 10th anniversary of the Euro!

Yay.

Posted by: al-Cicero, Tea Party Jihadist at December 31, 2011 01:50 PM (yQwq5)

162 Seriously, I get that it's sad that the guy was killed by a bear. But so was his girlfriend, and that's on him.

In the old days, someone who tried to commune with bears would have been banished for sheer dumbassery.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:50 PM (6TB1Z)

163 I don't mind snakes and mice. (Ok, poisonous snakes and/or 13 foot snakes, yeah. I would have a problem with those.) What I really hate is creepy crawlies. Anything with more than 4 legs and I'm grabbing the industrial size can of Raid I have in the laundry room.

Posted by: PAgirlinNC at December 31, 2011 01:50 PM (EsvOe)

164 no good deed: Oh, that's bad news. And if one is coming at you, don't waste a bullet firing a warning shot. Just let him have it.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:50 PM (iTfHR)

165 138

I always wanted to sock Timmy Treadwell.

Now I'm jealous.

Posted by: Rachel Corrie at December 31, 2011 05:40 PM (yQwq5)

Woulda made more sense if her name was Rachel Treadwell, when you think about it.

Posted by: Ace's liver at December 31, 2011 01:51 PM (1+XRG)

166 Wassup? Talking about bears, huh? How appropriate. Mr Y-not and I are headed off to see the Utah Grizzlies play hockey in a bit.

'Hope everyone has a great New Years Eve!

Posted by: Y-not at December 31, 2011 01:51 PM (5H6zj)

167 Erik, no worries. He was very drunk and one I snapped out of my helpless female shock, I got out of it with nothing but a teeny little scar to remind me that I am strong.

Christy, God bless you. I hope 2012 is better for you!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:51 PM (SsG4J)

168 One of my fondest memories is tossing a stick of dynamite into a rattlesnake den. BOOM, Motherf*ckers!

Posted by: Fritz at December 31, 2011 01:52 PM (FabC8)

169 Grizzly bears stole my VW Bus and smoked all my weed.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at December 31, 2011 01:52 PM (jucos)

170 We've been seeing coyotes quite a lot here in suburban Connecticut... Can't wait for the first report of one munching down on a toddler... All in all, I prefer my wildlife in a national park , the local zoo, or my grocer's freezer.

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 01:52 PM (niZvt)

171 Years ago I came home from work one summer afternoon and one of my neighbor's wives was in the pool with her young daughter. She told me there was snake in the skimmer but she couldn't get it out. (she was from Rochester, NY). I went over and looked at it and it was a water moccasin. She about shit a brick when I told her that.

Went in the house and got my shotgun. Got the snake out with the dip net and it started crawling away rapidly. So I popped him with the shotgun on the concrete. Big mistake. I was washing snake off the fence and my umbrella as well as the concrete. And it stunk bad.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 01:52 PM (YdQQY)

172

@164

I'm with you, I see a spider and I'm in total freakout mode, same thing with wasps, which makes spring and summer in Missouri particularly unpleasant for me when outdoors.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:53 PM (HPcQF)

173 160 From what I can tell, in Australia, you're either poisonous, or you're lunch.

I live in Florida and dream of a place where one can swim without worrying about gators or cottonmouths.

Australia is not that place.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 05:50 PM (piMMO)

California would be that place, or at least one of them. Of course, you sometimes have hippies on the banks of a waterway, but they generally stay away from the water itself.

Posted by: Ace's liver at December 31, 2011 01:53 PM (1+XRG)

174 >>>Grizzly bears are fine in the fall... Tell that to Zombie Treadwell and Zombie girlfriend. they were killed in the fall by hungry bears.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:53 PM (iTfHR)

175 All in all, I prefer my wildlife in a national park , the local zoo, or my grocer's freezer.

I agree with that, although there was a really beautiful hawk in my backyard today. OTOH, they can't pick you up and eat you. Well, at least without a fight.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:53 PM (6TB1Z)

176 Grizzlies I've read, (none around here) are a different story altogether.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 05:39 PM (HBqDo)

I always heard that you can tell grizzly scat from other bear scat because the grizzly scat has belt-buckles in it.

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 01:54 PM (i3+c5)

177 We've been seeing coyotes quite a lot here in suburban Connecticut... Can't wait for the first report of one munching down on a toddler.

I saw an article a few months ago that said they were all over NYC and long island now. I haven't seen any here but it probably will not be long.

We are getting armadillos now from TX.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 01:54 PM (YdQQY)

178

>>Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 05:45 PM (iTfHR)

I've seen Black bears around here, usually in my truck, as they are crossing the road or in a field several times. Twice in the yard, I live in a rural area.

I have never heard of any attacks around here ever, by story or in the news. And they will put them on anytime they are in a tree or in a yard on camera. But no attacks.

No one is dumb enough to leave garbage around or feed them.

Much more concerned about the Left than the Bears.

One thing for sure, you will not outrun them.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 01:54 PM (HBqDo)

179

Black Bears aren't a problem, so long as you don't feed them or leave garbage out.
Grizzlies I've read, (none around here) are a different story altogether.

Grizzlies (in the lower 4 are apex predators and have zero fear. They will doggedly pursue you if you present a potential for a meal. Other places, where they are hunted, they develop a sense of self preservation and respect most human boundaries.

Black Bear are much less aggressive and behave a lot more like raccoons than they do other bears. They'll still fuck your world up if you don't show them the proper respect, but are mostly timid and quite reclusive.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 01:55 PM (WHBt7)

180 @107 I hear ya, brah! Don't know how many times I've said to myself, "Hawaii is a stupid, lava bubbling, waste of time!" I so wish that an insider, who has served in the US House of Representatives, would write a newsletter and address this issue. Hell, I would PAY for that!

Posted by: Deety thinks it's the Jooos! at December 31, 2011 01:55 PM (RvDoQ)

181 @173 Yeah, I hate the flying things, too. I have a can of Raid for them as well.

Posted by: PAgirlinNC at December 31, 2011 01:55 PM (EsvOe)

182

I've never been face to face with a bear but my dearly departed grandpa had 140 acres in the hills of SE Ohio and we would take walks around the trail that Columbia Gas would use to access a gas well at the bottom.

One day we were walking along and grandpa spotted a large bear print in the clay with a smaller print inside of it. Grandpa said something to the effect of "We'd better turn around right the fuck now."

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 01:56 PM (LVLea)

183

I think they either have or soon will establish a bear season in Missouri for the first time in I don't know how many years.

A lot more mountain lions in Missouri now as well.

Weird. Must be global warming.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 01:56 PM (HPcQF)

184 Black Bear are much less aggressive and behave a lot more like raccoons than they do other bears. They'll still fuck your world up if you don't show them the proper respect, but are mostly timid and quite reclusive.

But do they make sensitive lovers, garrett?

Posted by: Y-not at December 31, 2011 01:56 PM (5H6zj)

185 >>>I always heard that you can tell grizzly scat from other bear scat because the grizzly scat has belt-buckles in it. But no dicks...

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:57 PM (iTfHR)

186 At the risk of inserting politics and the usual bile into what should be an animus-free zone, I present the following from Insty:

surging Mitt Romney unleashed a blistering attack on President Obama yesterday as the Republican presidential hopeful prepared to barnstorm Iowa, saying the Democrat is in over his head, has poisoned politics and will go down as nothing more than a footnote in history

More of this please.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 01:57 PM (6TB1Z)

187 173 Dave, stay away from West TX. The tarantulas breed in the summer. Our yard was full of them when we lived there. Those suckers are hideous, but then again, so are the rattlesnakes, scorpions, black widows and brown recluses.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 01:57 PM (mjR67)

188 The Sweater-Full-of-Mischief Award for Humorous News Blogging: Ace o' Spades

Posted by: s☺mej☼e at December 31, 2011 01:58 PM (oif6Y)

189

I have heard that bears in heavily hunted areas are no longer fearful of the report of a rifle. They will now go towards it because they have learned that fresh meat may be available.

Yep. My buddy had a big boar walk off with a 6 x 6 Elk a few year back. He just picked it up by the spine and took it off into the thick timber.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 01:58 PM (WHBt7)

190 >>>But do they make sensitive lovers, garrett? Yeah, if you like to be skull fucked.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 01:58 PM (iTfHR)

191 "162 It's the 10th anniversary of the Euro!" Heh! About a year after it was introduced, some young bargirl onboard my flight to Europe took offense when I tried paying for my bj drink with an old fashioned $20 bill. Given the current state of the Euro, I'll bet today she would serve me my drink, swallow my second chakra, and tongue tickle my prodigious testes for that $20 today!

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 01:58 PM (niZvt)

192 Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 05:57 PM (iTfHR)
Even bears have pic-a-dic standards!

Posted by: Yogi B at December 31, 2011 01:58 PM (i3+c5)

193

Armadillos are nothing to fear, they're harmless. ....But they can really mess up your yard, digging for grubs, if you have any.

Coyotes are a different story. .....They eat cats, small dogs....anything really, that they can catch.

A small pack of coyotes can take down a calf. .....A bigger pack can take down a full grown cow.

Posted by: wheatie at December 31, 2011 01:59 PM (oPkw3)

194 We are getting armadillos now from TX.

They are thick in Arkansas now, too, Vic. So much so that the mama red fox at the bottom of our property didn't ever have to hunt food for her kits. She'd just drag a freshly road killed armadillo down to them every other day.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 01:59 PM (SsG4J)

195 Every once in a while a suet bird feeder will end up in the middle of the pasture or a 10 gallon water bucket will end up smushed, but I have never once seen a bear here in NC. I tell myself it's just really big raccoons.

Posted by: Lincolntf at December 31, 2011 01:59 PM (uIz80)

196 erm, this one...

Posted by: s☺mej☼e at December 31, 2011 01:59 PM (oif6Y)

197 Yep. My buddy had a big boar walk off with a 6 x 6 Elk a few year back. He just picked it up by the spine and took it off into the thick timber.

Damn, not just the bears but the pigs too? The world is a dangerous place!

Posted by: Ace's liver at December 31, 2011 02:00 PM (1+XRG)

198

#190

Wait.. was it a boar or a bear???

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 02:00 PM (sOd/c)

199

@188

I will not be visiting West Texas soon, thanks for the heads up.

And those brown recluses are some nasty SOBs which we have plenty of here in Missouri.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 02:00 PM (HPcQF)

200 or, maybe, this one...

Posted by: s☺mej☼e at December 31, 2011 02:00 PM (oif6Y)

201 ontherocks: Where do you live?

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:00 PM (iTfHR)

202 I am participating in a legendary discussion. We are talking about bears.

Neal Stephenson wrote about it.

No one's mentioned menstruation yet?

Posted by: Dianna at December 31, 2011 02:01 PM (mKMj1)

203 Dammit. Never bet on the ACC team. Utah 30 GT 27.

Posted by: toby928© at December 31, 2011 02:01 PM (GTbGH)

204 Yeah, I hate the flying things, too. I have a can of Raid for them as well.

And, yet again, Florida seeks to out-gross the rest.

We have roaches. We have flying insects. And we have flying roaches.

And brown widows. I an walk around my house and point out about 20 at any given time.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:01 PM (piMMO)

205 Armadillos are nothing to fear, they're harmless.

Eh, yeah, except for the whole leprosy-carrying thing.

Posted by: Ace's liver at December 31, 2011 02:01 PM (1+XRG)

206 Armadillos are nothing to fear, they're harmless.

Oh I wasn't worried about that. What concerns me though is they are not native to this region and therefore probably have no predators to limit their increases. I worry that we will soon be overrun with them.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 02:01 PM (YdQQY)

207 Armadillos are nothing to fear, they're harmless

Yeah, except for the whole leprosy thing.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 02:01 PM (6TB1Z)

208 Armadillos carry leprosy.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 02:02 PM (mjR67)

209 Even after Treadwell, some old coot in Alaska was feeding grizzly bears close to his cabin. They arrested him and gave him a huge fine for it.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:02 PM (iTfHR)

210 ok... how about; this one?

Posted by: s☺mej☼e at December 31, 2011 02:02 PM (oif6Y)

211 And those brown recluses are some nasty SOBs which we have plenty of here in Missouri.

We have those too, but the good news is that when you have widow spiders, you don't have recluses. I'll take the widows any day because they aren't aggressive.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:02 PM (piMMO)

212 Dave, where in MO are you? We got plenty of tarantulas in northern Arkansas, so they must have 'em in southern MO.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:02 PM (SsG4J)

213 @203: Bears with Red Wings? Bet Yogi wouldn't like that...

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 02:02 PM (niZvt)

214 It's been my experience that most bear hunters really don't come come for the hunt.

Posted by: The Bear at December 31, 2011 02:03 PM (GZitp)

215 @206
I grind my teeth in fruitless rage.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 02:03 PM (6TB1Z)

216 Before bears hibernate they seal up their poopers with mud to keep the ants out. I can't imagine how a biologist would explain how that came about... it's a wonderful world

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 02:03 PM (sOd/c)

217 you guys better watch it with this leprosy shit

Posted by: Armadillo Anti-Defamation League at December 31, 2011 02:04 PM (jbVeA)

218 216 @206
I grind my teeth in fruitless rage.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 06:03 PM (6TB1Z)

Heh heh.

Posted by: Ace's liver at December 31, 2011 02:05 PM (1+XRG)

219 True bear story: Back in the mid eightys when I was fishing up in Alaska, we took a break and steered the boat to Afognak Island, just north of Kodiak for black tail deer season. The bag limit was three each, as a full grown buck wasn't much bigger than a large dog. Hunting was good. The first deer was dropped before the anchor, with my buddy taking a shot off the bow. The deer cooperatively rolled down the hill to the beach for easy gutting and transport. Anyway, about the third day we had all taken different trails and were anticipating wrapping things up since we were nearing our limit. Off to my left I heard BAM...BAM..BAM BAM BAM! Now I knew that the only guy on my left was the skipper, Houston McCroskey. Mac, as we called him was an excellent shot having been a hunting guide in Montana in an earlier iteration of his life. Furthermore, he wasn't going to be wasting lead in the thick underbrush that is common on the island. A few moments later I hear I him calling for us to come on over and "take a look at this fucking thing.". Turns out a big ol brown bear got a hair across his ass and decided to rush the wrong dude. Fucker must have been 800 pounds if an ounce. And yeah, he stunk. Pretty badass though, Mac didn't miss a shot. 5 rounds from a 30 30 was what it took.

Posted by: Wyatt's Torch at December 31, 2011 02:05 PM (zxrQh)

220

I bump into Black Bear all the time while out on my mountain bike. This past spring I split a mom and her two cubs on a downhill and had to get off my bike and back off the trai labout a 1/4 mile to let momma gather up her cubs. The important thing with the black bear is to give it space and afford it the easiest escape route. It's rare that they'll not take it. If you stumble across a lone boar on a food source, then you have a bit more to worry about...

really, it's the moose you want to avoid. you don't want to tangle with one of those things.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 02:05 PM (WHBt7)

221 Before bears hibernate they seal up their poopers with mud to keep the ants out. I can't imagine how a biologist would explain how that came about... it's a wonderful world

No effin way!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:05 PM (piMMO)

222 >>>Coyotes are a different story. .....They eat cats, small dogs....anything really, that they can catch. Yeah, that bimbo Paris Hilton put her two small dogs out in the yard one night when she lived in the Hwd Hills. That's like ringing a dinner bell. Even day light is not safe.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:05 PM (iTfHR)

223

Posted by: The Bear at December 31, 2011 06:03 PM (GZitp)

ah...the classics.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 02:06 PM (WHBt7)

224 Now I'm reconsidering taking Clemson over West Virgina.

Posted by: toby928©: Poluting your thread with football at December 31, 2011 02:06 PM (GTbGH)

225 Australia has already seen the New Year. So it will be old and slimy and covered with the webs of poisonous spiders by the time it gets to us. Bastards!
Ha-ha! Not here, hump lady.

Posted by: samoa at December 31, 2011 02:07 PM (sHY5w)

226 So, does anyone have a New Year's Eve/New year's day tradition they do? We always put a wallet with some money in it in the front doorway and definitely sauerkraut on New Year's Day.

Posted by: PAgirlinNC at December 31, 2011 02:07 PM (EsvOe)

227 I worry that we will soon be overrun with them.

You will be. And they will tear your yard up, too. I think we're allowed to shoot them as nuisances, but you never see them during the day. The only predator they have as near as I can tell is the automobile.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:07 PM (SsG4J)

228 ontherocks: Where do you live?

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 06:00 PM (iTfHR)

Within sight of Mt. Washington, right on the NH/Maine border.

I actually live in a log home, pretty far off the beaten path, dirt road and all, town doesn't even plow here.

Funny thing is, we have another place just south of Boston (otr) on the beach and we see coyotes all the time, even early mornings on the beach. Never have seen one coyote up here.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 02:07 PM (HBqDo)

229 NDH, I have a story for you. One night' my mother had just gotten out of the shower. She opened up the medicine cabinet to get something, and one of those dang flying roaches flew out and landed right between her breasts. She ran out the bathroom screaming and slapping at herself. Then, lost the towel and kept on running. My brothers and I were laughing hysterically. The more she slapped, the more that little bastard kept flapping its wings. I hate roaches.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 02:08 PM (mjR67)

230 Yeah, that bimbo Paris Hilton put her two small dogs out in the yard one night when she lived in the Hwd Hills.

Awaiting the inevitable "coyotes ate my pussy" comment.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 02:08 PM (6TB1Z)

231 So, does anyone have a New Year's Eve/New year's day tradition they do? We always put a wallet with some money in it in the front doorway and definitely sauerkraut on New Year's Day.

Black eyed peas

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:08 PM (piMMO)

232 222 Before bears hibernate they seal up their poopers with mud to keep the ants out.Â I do something like that with chocolate to keep Skippy out at night.

Posted by: Barney Frank at December 31, 2011 02:09 PM (niZvt)

233 Tell that to Zombie Treadwell and Zombie girlfriend. they were killed in the fall by hungry bears.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 05:53 PM (iTfHR)

They were eaten by a grizzly with whom they were trying to fuck. There is a big difference with giving a bear his space in the spring than in the fall. In the spring, his space is anywhere he wants to be eating you. In the fall, you can walk a wide path around them and they mostly will ignore you. Treadwell was trying to pet the damned thing. That couldn't be good for Grizz's image, not to mention his appetite.

Posted by: tcn at December 31, 2011 02:09 PM (hQX3k)

234

Armadillos carry leprosy? ....Damn. I didn't know that. .....But how would you catch it from one? .....They come through my neighborhood at night, ususally in late summer. I've never touched one of them.

Vic.....coyotes will eat armadillos, I think. But I know what you're saying. ....Armadillos will usually migrate back down to warmer climates, when the weather gets cold. So at least there's that.

Posted by: wheatie at December 31, 2011 02:09 PM (oPkw3)

235

And yeah, he stunk.

Like Death, Wet Ewok and Garbage... fucking.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 02:10 PM (WHBt7)

236 Oz is chock full of unpleasant critters, particularly their government.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at December 31, 2011 02:11 PM (6pkV7)

237 Chow!
No, I couldn't have another bite--I had a black lab for lunch.

Posted by: zombie kim jong-il at December 31, 2011 02:11 PM (sHY5w)

238 Well folks, time to break out the stuff and start drinking in the New Year. be back tomorrow.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (YdQQY)

239 NDH Â— I learned about that one when I moved south. Are you in/from the south?

Posted by: PAgirlinNC at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (EsvOe)

240 @phoenixgirl Yeah, here's the deal with rattlers in AZ... I gots no problem with you being all snakey and living your snakey life. You just can't do it in my back yard. Sorry, but I have pets/kids that WILL make you bite them because they are stupid, that way. I tried to relocate your ass, about 3 times but you keep coming back. Now I have to chop your head off with a shovel. OMG!!! Eeeew, eeew!!!

Posted by: Deety at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (RvDoQ)

241 NDH, I have a story for you. One night' my mother had just gotten out of the shower. She opened up the medicine cabinet to get something, and one of those dang flying roaches flew out and landed right between her breasts. She ran out the bathroom screaming and slapping at herself. Then, lost the towel and kept on running. My brothers and I were laughing hysterically. The more she slapped, the more that little bastard kept flapping its wings. I hate roaches.

Someone would have to clean up the trail of pee I'd leave behind if that happened.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (piMMO)

242

@213 Tammy

South central MO around Rolla and Ft. Leonard Wood, about 2 hours from the Arkansas border.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (HPcQF)

243 Treadwell was trying to pet the damned thing.

I really don't get why this is so difficult to understand.

Posted by: Charles Darwin at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (6TB1Z)

244 Black eyed peas

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 06:08 PM (piMMO)

Yep. Hoppin' John and collard greens in Thorland.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:12 PM (SsG4J)

245 They were eaten by a grizzly with whom they were trying to fuck. There is a big difference with giving a bear his space in the spring than in the fall. In the spring, his space is anywhere he wants to be eating you. In the fall, you can walk a wide path around them and they mostly will ignore you. Treadwell was trying to pet the damned thing. That couldn't be good for Grizz's image, not to mention his appetite. Posted by: tcn at December 31, 2011 06:09 PM (hQX3k) Maybe he assumed it was Ben from the old Grizzly Adams show, and tried getting his autograph?

Posted by: Barney Frank at December 31, 2011 02:13 PM (niZvt)

246 NDH Â— I learned about that one when I moved south. Are you in/from the south?

Jacksonville

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:13 PM (piMMO)

247 Off, sock

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 02:13 PM (niZvt)

248 Oh, and you can't do laundry on New Year's Day.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:14 PM (piMMO)

249 Most rattlers are fairly territorial too. If you see one, its been living in the same general area for a while. Coral snakes are vagabonds and rarely stay in the same place twice.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at December 31, 2011 02:14 PM (6pkV7)

250 >>Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 06:12 PM (YdQQY)

Happy New Year Vic, hope '12 is better for you than '11 and your good news outweighs the bad by a wide margin.

Posted by: ontherocks at December 31, 2011 02:15 PM (HBqDo)

251 Coyotes ain't nothin' to fret about.

Posted by: Rick Perry at December 31, 2011 02:15 PM (HPcQF)

252 You know, back when people were more enlightened and sophisticated they would hunt dangerous animals to extinction whenever they colonized a new area. We are truly on the decline when we forget the most basic prerequisites for establishing a civilization.

Posted by: Voluble at December 31, 2011 02:15 PM (JKX4x)

253

Which reminds me of story my Uncle told me about 25 years ago.

A friend of his wanted to go bear hunting with a bow and arrow (heavy compound hunting bow) and bought a permit to take a bear in Alaska. So he goes out and finds a grizz and shoots it. And that bear was plenty mad. He treed that guy for over 24 hours. The bear went off and killed something and drug it back to the tree and ate it while watching my Uncle's friend up in the tree.

Finally some of the hunter's guides showed up looking for him and killed the bear with rifles.

Moral of the story: If you are hunting a bear, make sure you are armed to kill it. A griz is large, smart, dangerous animal. Polar bears are in the same family as "brown" bears, aka Grizzlies. There are not too many grizzlies left in the lower 48 (most in the Rockies, Tetons, etc.). At short range you need a .45 ACP or a .357 Magnum to bring one down (or a .44 magnum, if you are big enough to shoot one). Their skull are pretty thick so even a head shot may not kill them.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at December 31, 2011 02:15 PM (sJTmU)

254 Well folks, time to break out the stuff and start drinking in the New Year. be back tomorrow.

Posted by: Vic at December 31, 2011 06:12 PM (YdQQY)

Happy New Year's, Vic.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 02:15 PM (LVLea)

255 Yep, we do the black-eyed-peas on New Years Day. Can't wait.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 02:16 PM (HPcQF)

256 Petting a Griz doesn't seem like an activity likely to pass along your genes. Perhaps it was for the best from an evolutionary POV.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at December 31, 2011 02:16 PM (6pkV7)

257 Yep. Hoppin' John and collard greens in Thorland.

I could eat collard greens every day of my life. Too danged bad I can't cook 'em. And someone here, within the last few days, made mention of fried cornbread.

I don't give a rat's patootie what anyone says, if it is cooked in an oven it isn't really southern cornbread.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:16 PM (piMMO)

258 South central MO around Rolla and Ft. Leonard Wood, about 2 hours from the Arkansas border.

Have you never seen tarantulas in October, walking along the damn road like they owned it? I'd think there'd be a good plenty 'round Ft Lost-in-the-Woods.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:16 PM (SsG4J)

259

#235

I'm not sure how you contract leprosy from an armadillo, but I know for sure that the UCMJ no longer prohibits it...

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 02:16 PM (sOd/c)

260

@259 Tammy

No, and I hope I never do.

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 02:17 PM (HPcQF)

261 Too bad no one had a pocket knife handy. Might have been that kid's only chance to scratch "get all stabby with an Amethystine Python" off of his bucket list.

Posted by: i like anchors 2012 at December 31, 2011 02:17 PM (LCZ3l)

262 tcn: Not quite. They were leaving the next day and were in their tents getting ready for sleep when bears wandered into their campground. Treadwell went out to scare them away and got attacked. GF tried to scare them away but couldn't. The bears left for a short time and then came back and dragged Treadwell off. He screamed for the girl to save herself. Apparently, she was unable to do so. The NPS said they were older, undernourished bears. Supposedly, the berry crops didn't do so well that year. I didn't know that berries were such an integral part of a bears diet.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:17 PM (iTfHR)

263 We are truly on the decline when we forget the most basic prerequisites for establishing a civilization.

Posted by: Voluble at December 31, 2011 06:15 PM (JKX4x)

What makes you think we are interested in establishing a civilization? Almost every political actions all Western civilizations have taken lately seem far more directed to disestablishing their existing hard-won civilization.

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 02:19 PM (i3+c5)

264 Well, I bought 10 Powerball tickets tonight. Dave Ramsey would disapprove, but I like dreaming about what I would do if I actually won....cheap entertainment, right?

Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2011 02:19 PM (HPcQF)

265 My Jack Russell Terrier found a big cottonmouth one time and wouldn't back away. Of course. I mean, JRT.

When the snake coiled to strike, I closed the six feet between us and grabbed it so fast, it didn't even have time to turn toward me. There was a pop when my hand hit it.

I was raised on Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. I know how to grab a snake.

That JRT was like my kid. It was pure adrenaline-fueled instinct. I'm sure I wouldn't have tried it otherwise.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 02:19 PM (+8ydH)

266 The word is "berries"... duh!!

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 02:20 PM (sOd/c)

267 I once petted a real buffalo. It was very gentle and surpringly soft. Kind of cold and lumpy, but getting ground and sitting in the refrigerated meat section can do that.

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 02:21 PM (niZvt)

268 ...and were in their tents getting ready for sleep when bears wandered into their campground. Treadwell went out to scare them away and got attacked. GF tried to scare them away but couldn't. The bears left for a short time and then came back and dragged Treadwell off. He screamed for the girl to save herself. Apparently, she was unable to do so

How do we know this?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:21 PM (piMMO)

269 deety lol........

Posted by: phoenixgirl all in for perry at December 31, 2011 02:21 PM (Ho2rs)

270 Their skull are pretty thick so even a head shot may not kill them.
Da, comrade.

Posted by: russian bear at December 31, 2011 02:21 PM (sHY5w)

271 I don't give a rat's patootie what anyone says, if it is cooked in an oven it isn't really southern cornbread.

Yea, I think we call that hoe cakes!

I love greens period; I actually prefer a mix of turnip and mustard greens, but collards are easier to come by. I buy the frozen kind; my grandmothers probably roll over in their graves!

You're probably just too health conscious to cook good greens. The amount of salt and pork product needed to make them truly well is sort of staggering.

Thor won't touch 'em, so I get 'em all,including the pot liquor !

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:22 PM (SsG4J)

272 if you missed the Georgia Tech/Utah game, too bad. You probably missed the best bowl game this cycle. It didn't go the way I wanted, but there's no denying the overtime win by Utah was exciting.

Posted by: naturalfake at December 31, 2011 02:22 PM (I49Jm)

273 #249 Â— I've not heard of that one... Interesting.

Posted by: PAgirlinNC at December 31, 2011 02:22 PM (EsvOe)

274

There are not too many grizzlies left in the lower 48 (most in the Rockies, Tetons, etc.).

There are too damn many.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 02:23 PM (WHBt7)

275 268 I once petted a real buffalo.

It was very gentle and surpringly soft. Kind of cold and lumpy, but getting ground and sitting in the refrigerated meat section can do that. Posted by: CoolCzech

Ha!

There's a small herd in Golden Gate Park. One dog I had used to always try to get them to pay attention to him - evidently, he thought they were very large dogs. Kids stare at them for hours.

Posted by: Dianna at December 31, 2011 02:23 PM (mKMj1)

276 You probably missed the best bowl game this cycle.

I switched away when GT had a 14 point lead. Did they miss a FG to win in regulation? Is that what I heard?

Posted by: toby928©: Poluting your thread with football at December 31, 2011 02:24 PM (GTbGH)

277 >>>How do we know this? It was recorded. They accidentally turned their camera on in their camera bag. The recording was never released but LEO and Herzog have listened to it. It's very unpleasant.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:24 PM (iTfHR)

278

That's nothing-

When i was young I was once in a room SURROUNDED by dozens of bears of every size and shape. And i wasn't scared AT ALL.

Especially when they started to sing

Posted by: I was visiting Anaheim at December 31, 2011 02:24 PM (sOd/c)

279
It didn't go the way I wanted, but there's no denying the overtime win by Utah was exciting.

I'm still denying it, but I agree it was a good game! I'll get over it in a few days.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:24 PM (SsG4J)

280 I get 'em all,including the pot liquor !

Hence the need for pan fried cornbread!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:25 PM (piMMO)

281

Bears are omnivores like humans. They will eat anything, including carrion (like a dead whale that is beached - in Alaska of course.)

It's always open season on coyotes. I remember camping out several times at my sister's farm in southern Ohio and hearing the coyotes howling at night. And that's been years ago. People shoot them down there all the time - when they see them.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at December 31, 2011 02:26 PM (sJTmU)

282 How do we know this?
I wrote story for Bear Pravda.

Posted by: russian bear at December 31, 2011 02:26 PM (sHY5w)

283 #249 Â— I've not heard of that one... Interesting.

Very old south. If you do laundry on NYD you'll do laundry for a deadman by year's end.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:27 PM (piMMO)

284 (like a dead whale that is beached -- in Alaska of course.)
Woo-wee. I thought that one had my name on it for a second there.

Posted by: moochelle o. at December 31, 2011 02:27 PM (sHY5w)

285 Â There are not too many grizzlies left in the lower 48 (most in the Rockies, Tetons, etc.).Â Â One within lunch distance of me is one too many. People are now fretting friggin' mountain lions may be returning to CT! As lomg as they only munch on Evironuts, I'm finewith that. Otherwise: they should all be mounted and put on display eating little kids in the elementary schools, to remind the little tykes how Freaking Lucky they are to live in a world where most wildlife has been wiped out.

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 02:27 PM (niZvt)

286 @277 Yeah GT missed that FG. Which makes 3 missed FGs for the game any one of which would've won it for them. They did get the overtime FG then Utah drove the ball down to score a TD.

Posted by: naturalfake at December 31, 2011 02:29 PM (I49Jm)

287 You're probably just too health conscious to cook good greens. The amount of salt and pork product needed to make them truly well is sort of staggering.

This was a real culture shock for me when I married my wife. My family, being Scandis, cook vegetables by lightly steaming them til they barely lose their crunch. Her family grew up stewing vegetables into mush in a mixture of fatback and salt.

Both are good, but one won't give you a heart attack.

Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 02:30 PM (6TB1Z)

288 Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 06:19 PM (+8ydH)

Terriers are bad ass. Fearless and tenacious. From the tiny little Boston Terriers all the way up to the bigger dogs. Have you ever heard of the Black Russian Terriers? Check them out. If the Russians fused Terrier genes into their dogs of war, that says a lot.

Posted by: i like anchors 2012 at December 31, 2011 02:30 PM (LCZ3l)

289

Mountain lions (cougars) can be extremely dangerous - very sly and unpredictable. A friend of mine lived in a neighborhood right up next to Arapahoe National Forest (Colorado Springs), and a cougar came down into the neighborhood one night and killed a dog. They guessed he was either a very young cougar without a territory or an older cat that lost his territory.

There was another story of a jogger that was running up an old logging road and surprised a cougar that had killed something and was eating it in the road. The cougar killed the jogger.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at December 31, 2011 02:31 PM (sJTmU)

290 Hence the need for pan fried cornbread!

I am one of the rare Southerners who doesn't care much for cornbread, actually! I drink my pot liquor right outta the bottom of the bowl!

If I do make or eat cornbread, it needs to be made from real corn meal, not Jiffy. I prefer white cornmeal.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:31 PM (SsG4J)

291 We had frequent mountain lion sightings in San Angelo. The most were right across the street from our neighborhood out by Lake Nasworthy.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 02:33 PM (mjR67)

292 I've probably told this story, but I don't remember.

When I was little and was sick my grandmother would make a thick soup for me. I loved it and would ask for it even when I wasn't sick. It was made with onions and chicken broth and lots of black pepper.

Yummy.

I was in my forties before I realized it was corn meal gruel.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 02:34 PM (piMMO)

293 Posted by: pep at December 31, 2011 06:30 PM (6TB1Z)

I lovee green beans cooked down with bacon, fried white corn and fried okra now and then...but other than that, I prefer my veggies raw, for the most part.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:35 PM (SsG4J)

294

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at December 31, 2011 06:26 PM (sJTmU)

We find their scat every once in a while on the cart paths at work. They might be trotting through your backyard right now.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 02:36 PM (LVLea)

295 I love buttered cornbread, milk and honey all mixed together.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 02:36 PM (mjR67)

296 I was in my forties before I realized it was corn meal gruel.

LOL!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:37 PM (SsG4J)

297 What the hell kind of a name is Kye, and how do you pronounce it?
(In Australian or American, I don't care which.)

Posted by: notropis at December 31, 2011 02:38 PM (Ca1QE)

298

Beer - yes

Booze - yes

Cigs - yes

Chips -yes

More Chips - yes

Crackers - yes

Dips - yes

Cheese - yes

All Systems Go

Posted by: Journolist at December 31, 2011 02:39 PM (szbkL)

299

Speaking of nature run amok, here's an interesting item from Martha's Vineyard, wherein wild turkeys attack local residents.

I assure you, this is NOT a problem in the south.

Posted by: Wodeshed at December 31, 2011 02:39 PM (SgLsM)

300 A few years ago there was a mother coyote with her pups out by my shop. She was trying to teach them how to hunt. My chickens were the target. I tried to scare them away. One pup was too dumb for his own good. Had to pop him.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 02:40 PM (JGYCE)

301 I love buttered cornbread, milk and honey all mixed together.

Lots of folks do! I don't like mine mixed up with sweet stuff at all, but that's how my mama eats hers.

Now and then I will get hungry for it, and will usually add cheese, green onion and jalapenos. At some point, it ceases to be corn bead, I suppose! But it makes great dressing.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:41 PM (SsG4J)

302 Kye, proper noun pronounced as "doosh" in all languages.

Posted by: Lincolntf at December 31, 2011 02:42 PM (hiMsy)

303

Beer...check.

Chips...check.

Dips...check.

Scotch...check

Smokes...check.

Ready for takeoff...

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 02:42 PM (F26bS)

304 I assure you, this is NOT a problem in the south.

Heh.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:43 PM (SsG4J)

305 Coyotes were always eyeing my chickens. I would chase them on my motorcycle untill they ran under a fence sometimes a mile away.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 02:43 PM (JGYCE)

306

CanaDave -

Lighter...Check

Wife upset.... Check, et seq

Posted by: Journolist at December 31, 2011 02:44 PM (szbkL)

307 Thx for the Absinthe tip, T al T. Was gone for a bit~had to take the puppies to the leash free area for a romp. We're heading out to sushi tonight and on the way home...the liquor store...because, I Love black licorice. You sold me!

Posted by: Jypsea Rose at December 31, 2011 02:44 PM (digkk)

308 There was a cyclist in Orange Co Calif that was attacked by a cougar. Then hours later, another biker was attacked and being dragged off by the same cougar. Her friends fought it off. Then they found the first victim partially buried and partially eaten. Occasionally, we get a mtn lion sighting in our neighborhood. They will pay big bucks to fly in some expert to say dont' do anything while the fucker roams the streets. Ridiculous. I live near downtown LA - not in the back country.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:44 PM (iTfHR)

309 because, I Love black licorice. You sold me!

You'll enjoy it!!! Google it a bit...there is a proper way to prepare it....drinking it neat is apparently not a good idea!

Happy New Year!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:46 PM (SsG4J)

310 There was a unique candy store in Carson City NV that sold a caramel with a black licorice center. I could live on that candy but apparently there weren't enough people who thought the same coz they went out of business. Sniff. I have no choice now, but to get my black licorice fix from absinthe. Sigh.

Posted by: Jypsea Rose at December 31, 2011 02:46 PM (digkk)

311

@Journolist...

...lets's go ahead an launch anyway, over...

Posted by: CanaDave at December 31, 2011 02:46 PM (F26bS)

312 We could stop all this unnecessary bloodshed by simply giving all these animals food stamps

Posted by: SCOAMF at December 31, 2011 02:47 PM (sOd/c)

313 There was a cyclist in Orange Co Calif that was attacked by a cougar.

Didn't grab a toddler at a playground awhile back, and his nanny beat it off? Now that took some courage. Brave, brave lady.

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:48 PM (SsG4J)

314 Okay. Gotta sign off for a bit. Husband suggested I shower before sushi. Coming from the dog park...meh...okay, sure. Be back later!

Posted by: Jypsea Rose at December 31, 2011 02:48 PM (digkk)

315 I have no choice now, but to get my black licorice fix from absinthe. Sigh.

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:48 PM (SsG4J)

316
I live near downtown LA - not in the back country.

It's a very apt metaphor, isn't it, for the collapse of civilization?

Posted by: Wodeshed at December 31, 2011 02:49 PM (SgLsM)

317 Food stamps for bears!!!

Posted by: OCCUPY the forest at December 31, 2011 02:49 PM (sOd/c)

318 Terriers are bad ass. Fearless and tenacious. From the tiny little Boston Terriers all the way up to the bigger dogs. Have you ever heard of the Black Russian Terriers? Check them out. If the Russians fused Terrier genes into their dogs of war, that says a lot. Posted by: i like anchors 2012 at December 31, 2011 06:30 PM

Yeah, they're corageous, and they have great personalities. I love 'em.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 02:50 PM (+8ydH)

319
Food stamps for bears!!!

We would prefer fresh souls.

Posted by: South Park Satan Worshipping Animals at December 31, 2011 02:51 PM (SgLsM)

320

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 06:40 PM (JGYCE)

You probably already know this but coyote are very cowardly animals. They only hunt in packs and even then they'll only go after prey if they greatly outnumber them.

There's tons of coyote around here but in the mid to late 00's they cleared out because bobcats moved down here from Michigan for whatever reason.

The coyote population in Ohio is coming back.

Also, I've never seen a bobcat but I hear those are some nasty cocksuckers that are not to be tangled with.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 02:51 PM (LVLea)

321
Christy, God bless you. I hope 2012 is better for you!

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 05:51 PM (SsG4J)

Thanks, Tammy. Happy New Year to you all.

Traditional Southern feast tomorrow: Hoppin' John for luck, with collard green's (Emeril's recipe made by one son...greens for riches), Mexican cornbread, with dessert of pecan pie (both for calories and just because).

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 02:52 PM (baL2B)

322

Posted by: Tammy al' Thor at December 31, 2011 02:54 PM (SsG4J)

323
..his nanny beat it off?

Je ne touche pas!

Posted by: Dominique Strauss Kahn at December 31, 2011 02:54 PM (SgLsM)

324

CanaDave -

Roger that.

Fridge turned to maximum..... Check

Posted by: Journolist at December 31, 2011 02:54 PM (szbkL)

325 The guy who was on his bike that was killed - they said that he was fixing a broken chain and might have been crouching down. Again, that is like a dinner bell to a cougar. They jump on your back, put their jaws around your head and bite, and then drag you off into the brush to nosh and bury the rest of you for a snack later.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 02:55 PM (iTfHR)

326
Cougars are just big pussies.

Posted by: Pistol Packing Perry at December 31, 2011 02:55 PM (SgLsM)

327

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 06:51 PM (LVLea)

You are correct about the pack hunting mentality, unless the prey is small, like a chicken. Coyotes would try to coax my part sheep dog out so they could circle and attack. He would make a run at one then run to the house where he could come inside.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 02:57 PM (JGYCE)

328

Then hours later, another biker was attacked and being dragged off by the same cougar. Her friends fought it off.

This is going to happen, again, where I mountain bike. It happened about 8 years ago to a kid.

I see cats a lot, I see their sign all the time...I also see tons of cute college girls running these trails, solo, with earbuds in. It's only a matter of time before a cat takes a poke at one of them.

Posted by: garrett at December 31, 2011 02:58 PM (WHBt7)

329 There's tons of coyote around here but in the mid to late 00's they cleared out because bobcats moved down here from Michigan for whatever reason.
Taxes.

Posted by: bobcat at December 31, 2011 02:59 PM (sHY5w)

330 Are you changing your name to mountain lion, garrett?

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 02:59 PM (mjR67)

331

So, I was a little guy, as most 2nd graders are. We took a class field trip to the natural history museum. After a couple of hours milling around and looking at the bones and plants etc., little guys get kind of worn out and so I leaned back against one of the glass displays that lined one of the larger halls. As kids will, I glanced back over my shoulder, and slowly turned my little body around until I was facing the display. I found myself with my face just inches from the biggest cobra on Earth, in full hood display, and he was definitely going to eat me. I froze. I am talking froze-froze. If he was going to eat someone moving, it wasn't going to be me. I must have been there for 5 minutes. My little heart was about to burst from fighting the flight instinct. My teacher was yelling at me to join the group, the other kids were yelling at me to "come on!", but I was stuck. It was me and the cobra in a death stare-down. Only when the teacher placed herself between me and the snake did I finally reach up and wrap my arms around her waste and let her gently walk me backwards away from certain doom. Talk about a formative experience! I can still see the look in that snakes eyes. Oh, yeah, he was dead as a brick, but that didn't ever enter into the equation between me and that dead-stuffed awful critter! LOL!! So, anyhow, only good stuff for all of you during the 2012 orbit is my wish!!

Posted by: Errol at December 31, 2011 03:00 PM (vewos)

332 It's only a matter of time before a cat takes a poke at one of them.
And that's why I'm here to give them a poke first.

Posted by: frank drebin at December 31, 2011 03:01 PM (sHY5w)

333

131 I read somewhere that our fear of snakes comes from our most primitive part of the brain, a left over from our early evolution days.

I had a golden retriever who'd never seen a snake (to my knowledge), but freaked - and I mean freaked - one day when I was pulling a hose past him. He looked down, saw the hose apparently slithering near him, and jumped up so fast he almost stepped on his dick.

So, yeah, I think there's something deep down in the mammalian brain warning against snakes and such.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at December 31, 2011 03:01 PM (wJrOF)

334

#334

My ex was a chronic sufferer

Posted by: DaVE at December 31, 2011 03:08 PM (sOd/c)

335

Coyotes would try to coax my part sheep dog out so they could circle and attack.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 06:57 PM (JGYCE)

Interesting you mention that because a buddy of mine who is an avid bow hunter told me about how he was circled by a coyote pack one evening while he was waiting for deer.

He said he put a bolt through one and the rest fled. And that's right here in Central Ohio.

Posted by: ErikW at December 31, 2011 03:08 PM (LVLea)

336 I had a Chesapeake Bay retriever as a kid that got bitten by a copperhead (we had nests of them on the property). He recovered and hated snakes for the rest of his life. He would dance around a snake dodging the strikes until the snake was tired. Then he would rush in, grab the snake behind the head, shake it to break the spine, and go off to enjoy his new chew toy. It was fascinating to watch.

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 31, 2011 03:09 PM (i3+c5)

337

When I was stationed at Ft. Stewart with the ranger battalion we were doing small boat (black rubber raft) operations on the Ogeechee River. We came around a bend in the mostly black water river and up ahead was a churning, roiling shoal. Our platoon sgt., who was from Arizona, directed us to steer toward it to investigate. We were going downstream toward it and came within 10 feet of the spot before we realized it was a ball of water moccasin in, I guess, a mating ritual. A writhing, whirling medusa ball of death!! You never saw so much action as we backstroked our way outta there. True story.

Posted by: Tommy Gunnarson at December 31, 2011 03:14 PM (ybA9f)

338 Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 06:50 PM (+8ydH)

Courageous, yeah. I like that better than fearless. Cuz if they are scared (how can we prove they're not?) that makes the shit they do all the more impressive.

Posted by: i like anchors 2012 at December 31, 2011 03:17 PM (LCZ3l)

339

In high school I was on a jeep trip through part of the Anza-Borrego desert when a member of our party killed a rattler. My buddy, who was driving our jeep, wanted to skin the carcass, and so put it in the back of the jeep.

Shortly afterward he saw a park ranger, and knowing that killing wildlife is a no-no in a national park, reached back, grabbed the still writhing (headless) snake, and tried to toss it at my feet (where it wouldn't be so visible if the ranger looked over). I didn't see any of this, because I was looking out over the landscape through the passenger window.

Unfortunately, his throw was a little short, and the fucking snake landed in my lap, writhing and twitching. I almost had a heart attack at age 16.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at December 31, 2011 03:17 PM (wJrOF)

340 A friend of my dad is deathly afraid of snakes. He was out fishing one evening and couldn't restart his boat motor. He paddled to the bank and bumped a tree. Whereupon, a water moccasin fell into the boat with him. He proceeded to shoot the snake and the bottom out of the boat.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 03:19 PM (mjR67)

341

Tommy Gunnarson at December 31, 2011 07:14 PM (ybA9f

I once saw a ball of garter snakes doing the same thing. Must be a snake ritual.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 03:20 PM (JGYCE)

342 It had to be snakes.

Posted by: Indeeeeeeeee at December 31, 2011 03:22 PM (+8ydH)

343 I read years ago, perhaps in Nat Geo, about how vicious wolves are. I know...I know...but still, animals or not, they seems vicious. The story was something like this:

A man (group of men?) walked up on an icy stream in the middle of Winter and found an elk standing in it. It made no attempt to run and when they got closer they could see that its flank had been eaten away and it appeared to be standing in the icy water to numb the wound. Basically, wolves had attacked it, eaten it alive, and then left it when they had their fill.

Just awful.

They shot it to put it out of its misery.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at December 31, 2011 03:25 PM (piMMO)

344 It has to be asked: how many killed and eaten human beings would environuts tolerate in return for a world full of the same predatory wildlife as existed c. 1492 in America?

Posted by: CoolCzech at December 31, 2011 03:26 PM (niZvt)

345 >>> Basically, wolves had attacked it, eaten it alive, and then left it when they had their fill. Yep, unless they bite your head and kill you, you're stuck being alive while they eat your limbs and take chunks out of you.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 03:29 PM (iTfHR)

346

Re: snake fear

I wrote this a while back in the thread about Salma Hayek's fear of snakes. IIRC, there is a video of her crawling up onto someone's neck during an interview.

I was doing some work in the backyard a couple of years ago. I hired a guy with a backhoe, a cowboy hat-wearin', tobacco-spittin' cowboy. The backhoe was a big one, too, about two stories tall. (I was installing a large, large french drain next to a retaining wall, eight feet deep, etc.) Anyway, as he excavated the back side of the retaining wall, he exposed a snake on one of the rock ledges. This was way below the level of the grade, and about half a mile from the totally enclosed, air conditioned cab of the backhoe.

He freaked out.

Granted, it was a water moccasin (or a cotton mouth-- depending upon where you're from). But he was freaking out. In that giant backhoe. I stood there on the edge of the hole completely befuddled. It took me a while to figure out what was wrong. I saw the snake and started looking down in the hole for a natural gas pipeline or something. Maybe an electrical cable. I couldn't hear him through the glass, but I saw where he was motioning. Frantically. It was the snake. He was paralyzed with fear.

Thank god he didn't try to drive the backhoe up onto my shoulders to get away from that snake.

He wouldn't move.

I jumped down into the hole, pulled the snake off the ledge, and tossed it over the retaining wall into the ravine. Then he went back to work.

I guess some people really have a deep fear of snakes.
Posted by: rdbrewer at June 09, 2010 04:46 PM

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 03:30 PM (+8ydH)

347 >>> It has to be asked: how many killed and eaten human beings would environuts tolerate in return for a world full of the same predatory wildlife as existed c. 1492 in America? Even the wildlife and NPS tend to be nuts. They always take the animals side. Unless it's their lives at stake. In fact, in the Treadwell case, they shot the bears because the bears were tracking and stalking the rangers. There's also a photo on the internet of a small plane that got attacked by a bear. I believe people were in it at the time but the plane was in shreds.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 03:32 PM (iTfHR)

348 One of my uncles was from Baton Rouge, and Cajuns/LSU fans are pretty crazy kin. He was driving on a highway one day and felt something in his pants. A snake of some sort had crawled up his pant's leg from the floor of the car. He braked on the highway and de-pants himself and the visitor after dancing a jig. I assume he was wearing boxers but was afraid to ask.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 03:41 PM (baL2B)

349 The snake was here first, he was only defending himself, and we can live in harmony with giant pythons, because I saw it at the movies. So I will tell my frightened 3-year-old to say bye-bye to the dangerous creature, scarring his little psyche for life, because animals are groovy.

Posted by: Idiot Aussie Mother at December 31, 2011 03:41 PM (DQHjw)

350 Snakes: My 90-pound grandmother killed a rattler with a hoe when she was 80 years old. She hated snakes.

Bears: When I was heading to IU's Geology Field camp in Montana, I was concerned about bears, having actually read about them. All of the rest of the guys and the prof laughed at me. Then we were in an area of hills and dry washes and one came up out of the wash and scattered about 50 students as it headed straight for the asshhole professor, who beat feet and went right through a barb wire fence.

Mountain lions: Several sightings in Indiana, including one on a night camera about 30 miles south of me at Camp Atterbury. It was dragging a full-grown buck in its mouth.

Posted by: Miss Marple at December 31, 2011 03:45 PM (GoIUi)

351 Here's a rattlesnake story I'm sure you will all enjoy. Years ago while mowing hay, the sickle plugged up, so I jumped off the tractor to clear it up. As I was reaching for the clump of grass, I noticed this wriggling mass of snakes among the grass. I had run through a rattlesnake nest. After I shook the turd down my pants leg, I got back on the tractor and let the sickle run for about 5 minutes to clean itself out.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 03:48 PM (JGYCE)

352 Awesome, Ronster.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 03:49 PM (mjR67)

353 Yeah, in my story I drew a discreet veil over the part about scooping out my undershorts.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at December 31, 2011 03:51 PM (wJrOF)

354 I have lots of stories concerning rattlesnakes and haying, but the rattlesnake nest was probably the scariest.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 03:52 PM (JGYCE)

355 My Dad killed a black bear when he was a fire lookout in Oregon in the 50s. The bear came through the open window in the middle of the night. Dad, who is blind as a bat without his glasses, picked up a Ruger .22 pistol and fired. He found it at the bottom of the hill the next morning. Now, a .22 is not really what I would call a bear killer, but this was the luckiest of lucky shots. The projectile bounced off the clavicle and punctured a major artery, causing the bear to bleed to death. We had that bear rug in my house when I was a kid, but I'm sure Mom got rid of it in one of their moves.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at December 31, 2011 03:52 PM (XL0x1)

356

Jay Guevara at December 31, 2011 07:51 PM (wJrOF)

That made me chuckle. You are just more civilized than I am.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 03:59 PM (JGYCE)

357 The stick I picked up to beat the snake to death with? Was a snake, not a stick.

Posted by: Boy Scout Tales at December 31, 2011 03:59 PM (4q5tP)

358 Back late 90's, I was driving La. 191 between Toro Bayou and Negreet. That's on the Louisiana side of the Sabine. It was about midnight and there had been some pretty serious forest fires in the Toledo Bend area with lots of critters migrating di-di. I saw a snake crossing the road and stopped to look (stayed in the truck). Rattler over 6 feet long and big around as a saucer. His head was almost as big as a red plastic cup. I had my .38 snubbie on me, but grabbed the camera first (for that Bigfoot or space alien photo). I got a good picture and decided if a bullet richocheted off the asphalt and took out a tire, I'd have to crawl under the truck for the spare. So I locked the wheel to the right and ran over him with the front left tire. When I backed up and shone the lights on him, he just shrugged and went on across the road. I was driving a stretch-cab F150. Just let his ass go. This evening a shot of rum at midnight, and tomorrow after church, porkchops, collards, blackeyed peas and rice, stewed okra, and cornbread. We have plenty of dangerous things in ETEX, some of them human. You just have to do your best no matter where you are, I suppose. Happy New Year and may America have a reformation and rejuvenation!

Posted by: EROWMER at December 31, 2011 04:05 PM (sIm3i)

359 I know where that is, erowmer. I have family in Florien.

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 04:09 PM (mjR67)

360 whats unhappy about the ending? did i miss something while supping my drink? the tot survived and the snake did too, right? help me out. Typo?

Posted by: Mike D. at December 31, 2011 04:11 PM (p8QOg)

361 Happy New Year Morons!
I am really enjoying these bear & snake stories. Took me an hour to get caught up and totally more than worth it. Wow.

Posted by: lauraw at December 31, 2011 04:12 PM (DbybK)

362 Mike D, I think the unhappy ending is that the snake was freed into the Rain Forest to squeeze another toddler on another day.. Not sure, but that is how I read it.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 04:13 PM (baL2B)

363 >>>whats unhappy about the ending? did i miss something while supping my drink? the tot survived and the snake did too, right? help me out. Typo? I bet you're the type that wants to release all the murderers from death row.

Posted by: mike at December 31, 2011 04:15 PM (iTfHR)

364 Snakes: My 90-pound grandmother killed a rattler with a hoe when she was 80 years old. She hated snakes.

I'm indifferent to them. They don't scare me at all. If it's a pit viper and there is little chance it will hurt me or another person or my pets, no biggie. But I'll kill a pit viper in a heartbeat if it's too close.

The non-poisonous ones? Don't even care.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 04:16 PM (+8ydH)

365 Happy New Year lauraw. You're not bad for a hump back.

Posted by: Ronster at December 31, 2011 04:16 PM (JGYCE)

366 BTW, it's good to teach a kid all the ways to identify a snake. That ability came in handy for me on at least a dozen occasions.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 04:17 PM (+8ydH)

367 If I lived there I would declare jihad on snakes and kill every one of the poisonous little SOBs. As it is, I live in the Southwest, and my jihad is against latrodectus mactans, the black widow.

Posted by: Jordan at December 31, 2011 04:18 PM (RSG1I)

368 rdbrewer, I am not sure what a pit viper is but I want them dead,too.

We were outside of Phoneix tubing (not sure which river now that I am drinking, but it made for numbness in water). It was 10am and there was a fast current sweeping my darlings ahead of me and generally freaking me out. I did settle down and enjoy the scenery about the time a bunch of tied-together tubes with partying college dudes and girls came by, chugging beers. One frat boy threw a water snake on the girl's tube, causing screams which caught our attention. Said water snake then was swimming towards me. My husband said the only thing touching my tube at that point was my finger and toe nails (I was in a back bend, very talented and bendy when scared).

Prior to this little expedition I had inquired about "moccasins" in river and got a blank look from tubing guys (who though I was referring to those injun shoes). The snake was probably harmless but I want them all dead.

Speaking of snakes, I am not seeing the term, SCOAMF used lately. Is it now forbidden like longbows? If you blink you miss something on this blog (I still don't know where one of my favorite 'ettes went). There needs to be an updated sidebar of events for those of us who travel.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 04:29 PM (baL2B)

369 Pit viper is a class of snakes that pretty much comprises all the poisonous ones in the US.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 04:31 PM (+8ydH)

370 Pit viper.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 04:32 PM (+8ydH)

371 Salt River, maybe, ChristyBlinky?

Posted by: no good deed at December 31, 2011 04:33 PM (mjR67)

372 Two kinda snakes: good ones, and live ones.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at December 31, 2011 04:34 PM (wJrOF)

373 I'll never forgive that damned Garden of Eden snake. Now I have to work for a living.

Posted by: CMU VET at December 31, 2011 04:38 PM (VYvY0)

374 @372: it was a river where you rode an old school bus squished in with big tractor tubes from the parking lot, but that sounds familiar. I considered the tubes air bags at the time as no way would I normally let my sons stand on a school bus without seatbelts in place. Let's just say I was not prepared for the entire gig the men in my family talked me into, and I am no sissy, having camped in Utah as a drunken college gal. I slept under the stars with scorpions and snakes and whatever in my innocent youth.

Drinking made me braver, I guess, also more foolish. I skiied on an icy ledge of a crevice with guys who kept saying, "You can do it!" to a girl from MS; as well as climbing down a shoot-thing in the "Firey Furnace" at Arches National Park with these same guys. Normally you are not supposed to enter this part of the park without a ranger, as it is like a maze.What was I thinking? Apparently I wasn't.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky at December 31, 2011 04:47 PM (baL2B)

375 Salma Hayek's snake freak out.

Posted by: rdbrewer at December 31, 2011 05:00 PM (+8ydH)

376 You made a few good points there. I did a search on the matter and found a good number of people will agree with your blog.

Posted by: Cast in Silence Audiobook at December 31, 2011 06:54 PM (VDV6K)

377 Pit viper is a class of snakes that pretty much comprises all the poisonous ones in the US.

Yo.

Posted by: A Coral Snake at December 31, 2011 11:25 PM (yQwq5)

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