March 15, 2011
— LauraW BREAKING NOW!
MUST CREDIT ACE OF SPADES HQ
DO NOT PANIC.
And hey, have a pleasant evening.
Posted by: LauraW at
03:54 PM
| Comments (203)
Post contains 27 words, total size 1 kb.
Posted by: Rocket J. Squirrel at March 15, 2011 03:59 PM (QKKT0)
Posted by: Lilikoi at March 15, 2011 03:59 PM (wfmlp)
Posted by: The Squirrel at March 15, 2011 03:59 PM (N2yhW)
Posted by: sTevo at March 15, 2011 04:01 PM (VMcEw)
Posted by: Sheriff Joe Biden at March 15, 2011 04:02 PM (QKKT0)
Posted by: Long Squirrel at March 15, 2011 04:04 PM (/8mBu)
I wish I was hung like a squirel! Oh wait ......
Posted by: Gilbert Gotfried at March 15, 2011 04:05 PM (oNphh)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at March 15, 2011 04:06 PM (qqrPQ)
PUDDING!!! YAAAYYYYY
Posted by: lauraw at March 15, 2011 04:07 PM (DbybK)
Posted by: hornyfemaledolphin at March 15, 2011 04:11 PM (MGC3K)
Posted by: Radagast the Naturalist at March 15, 2011 04:13 PM (MGC3K)
Posted by: GnuBreed at March 15, 2011 04:13 PM (ENKCw)
I thought I might go nut gathering, but it looks like I'm going diving . . .
Swiiiinnnnggg!
Does Squirrel have ta choke a bitch?!
Posted by: Da Squirrel at March 15, 2011 04:13 PM (penCf)
Posted by: Shepard Smith at March 15, 2011 04:15 PM (Gr1V1)
Posted by: momma at March 15, 2011 04:15 PM (penCf)
Posted by: Marcus at March 15, 2011 04:15 PM (l63Em)
Posted by: Catlady at March 15, 2011 04:16 PM (CyPWX)
U.S.-trained forces arrested in bloody slaying of kids 5 members of Jewish family killed inside their home
Posted by: FlaviusJulius at March 15, 2011 04:16 PM (qIHlG)
Posted by: Eric Cartman at March 15, 2011 04:16 PM (Gr1V1)
Posted by: jewells45 at March 15, 2011 04:16 PM (Z71Vg)
Posted by: asswhistle at March 15, 2011 04:17 PM (rgwre)
Posted by: Chris Matthews at March 15, 2011 04:17 PM (4ZxEW)
Posted by: us squirrels at March 15, 2011 04:17 PM (0GFWk)
Posted by: Cicero at March 15, 2011 04:18 PM (QKKT0)
Posted by: Bradley Manning at March 15, 2011 04:18 PM (MGC3K)
Posted by: Adriane at March 15, 2011 04:19 PM (0yDnd)
Posted by: nevergiveup at March 15, 2011 04:19 PM (0GFWk)
Posted by: Marcus at March 15, 2011 08:15 PM (l63Em)
Dude, not cool.
You don't shoot someone in the dick.
Posted by: Eric Cartman at March 15, 2011 08:16 PM (Gr1V1)
You can always use a knife...just sayin'
Posted by: Lorena Bobbitt at March 15, 2011 04:19 PM (YVZlY)
A billionaire auto dealer in Miami financed the recall petition that set up the recall election that turned out the mayor. "Financed the recall petition," as in "paid the signature-gatherers."
Paying the signature gatherers is exactly what the unions are doing in Wisconsin, in their efforts to recall republicans.
Who is paying signature gatherers to knock on doors and recall fleebagging dems?
Posted by: Cheesy at March 15, 2011 04:20 PM (4sQwu)
I'm a no.
Posted by: Dr Spank at March 15, 2011 04:21 PM (4ZxEW)
Posted by: Randall at March 15, 2011 04:21 PM (penCf)
Posted by: Lily Von Schtupp at March 15, 2011 04:22 PM (DbybK)
Posted by: nerdygirl's squirrel hating beagle at March 15, 2011 04:23 PM (EyTr4)
Posted by: CMU VET at March 15, 2011 04:24 PM (I4r6d)
'salright, Lilly von Shtupp, I know you were copying me.
Posted by: Zombie Marlene Dietrich at March 15, 2011 04:25 PM (cNHhh)
Posted by: Well hung fruit bat at March 15, 2011 04:25 PM (YVZlY)
Posted by: Dr Spank at March 15, 2011 04:26 PM (4ZxEW)
Posted by: Observer of squirrels at March 15, 2011 04:31 PM (YVZlY)
Is it time for "Big Dick" jokes?
Sure:
My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick
My dick is the Walrus, koo koo ga joob
My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee
My dick is so big, it's right behind you
(trust me, there's more)
Posted by: Jess at March 15, 2011 04:32 PM (cNHhh)
Posted by: USA at March 15, 2011 04:32 PM (YZISw)
Posted by: The Squirel at March 15, 2011 04:32 PM (NtXW4)
Posted by: Mike Huckabee at March 15, 2011 04:33 PM (7+pP9)
Posted by: Smileing Bob, the Enx1te Guy at March 15, 2011 04:34 PM (NtXW4)
He's grateful to be home and for all the prayers from the Moron Nation.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 15, 2011 04:35 PM (UOM48)
Posted by: MikeTheMoose at March 15, 2011 04:36 PM (0q2P7)
Posted by: CMU VET at March 15, 2011 04:37 PM (I4r6d)
Posted by: Eric Cantor at March 15, 2011 04:38 PM (UKSRV)
Posted by: Brian Fellows at March 15, 2011 04:41 PM (MWXXs)
He's grateful to be home and for all the prayers from the Moron Nation.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at March 15, 2011 08:35 PM (UOM4
Oh. Praise the Lord and thank a soldier! Your post brought tears to my eyes. How lucky you are to hug a hero, how awesome you are to have raised one.
Posted by: Pelosi's lonely, lonely scrunt at March 15, 2011 04:41 PM (penCf)
Posted by: USA at March 15, 2011 04:41 PM (YZISw)
Jane, of course that post isn't from Pelosi's lonely, lonely scrunt, it is from me.
Sorry, I'm not good with socks.
Posted by: momma at March 15, 2011 04:43 PM (penCf)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 04:43 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: Sparky at March 15, 2011 04:43 PM (NjXSJ)
Posted by: Sparky at March 15, 2011 04:45 PM (NjXSJ)
Just got D'oh Boy home from Tokyo.
I'm so glad, I know how much you've been missing him. Please thank him for his service and know we're always praying for all who serve.
Posted by: Annabelle at March 15, 2011 04:46 PM (4kxCX)
Posted by: Pat Fucking Caddell at March 15, 2011 04:46 PM (M70T8)
Posted by: yakima canutt, in below the sexy shoes at March 15, 2011 04:48 PM (tXbf1)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 08:43 PM (kUaEF)
And BANG KOK?
Posted by: Smileing Bob, the Enx1te Guy at March 15, 2011 04:51 PM (NtXW4)
Posted by: Whoooppee! Goldberg at March 15, 2011 04:53 PM (FJxYQ)
The pic is enough to make me sick.
Can anyone tell me what it says please?
Posted by: momma at March 15, 2011 04:53 PM (penCf)
Posted by: maddogg at March 15, 2011 04:53 PM (kW4zY)
Posted by: CoolCzech channeling Alfred Hitchcock at March 15, 2011 04:53 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: CoolCzech channeling Alfred Hitchcock at March 15, 2011 04:55 PM (kUaEF)
Yeah. It says "Get primed, the feckless fucktard is coming". No tomatos.
Posted by: maddogg at March 15, 2011 04:55 PM (kW4zY)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 04:55 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at March 15, 2011 04:56 PM (oBXlb)
Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at March 15, 2011 04:58 PM (oBXlb)
It's Brazil, so Portuguese, momma.
It says "Meet US President Barry. Free iPods and beer. Must be willing to applaud on command and be photographed".
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 15, 2011 04:58 PM (yf5H9)
Posted by: USA at March 15, 2011 04:58 PM (YZISw)
Posted by: phoenixgirl at March 15, 2011 04:59 PM (eOXTH)
Posted by: Bullwinkle at March 15, 2011 04:59 PM (YVZlY)
Posted by: Lady in Black at March 15, 2011 05:00 PM (x9xik)
Posted by: FlaviusJulius at March 15, 2011 05:00 PM (qIHlG)
Posted by: artesian at March 15, 2011 05:00 PM (vwHga)
Posted by: Le French Squirrel at March 15, 2011 05:01 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: phoenixgirl at March 15, 2011 05:01 PM (eOXTH)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 05:02 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: Crusty at March 15, 2011 05:02 PM (qzgbP)
Posted by: rdbrewer at March 15, 2011 05:02 PM (Hsbnu)
Posted by: Jethro at March 15, 2011 05:02 PM (oBXlb)
Posted by: FlaviusJulius at March 15, 2011 05:03 PM (qIHlG)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 05:03 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: humphreyrobot at March 15, 2011 05:05 PM (EiH7n)
Posted by: oldsailor's poet at March 15, 2011 05:05 PM (oBXlb)
Posted by: Guy who doesn't want to think up Brazilian wax joke at March 15, 2011 09:04 PM (YZISw)
If it was about Moochelle, you'd need a Brazilian wax factory.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 15, 2011 05:06 PM (yf5H9)
Posted by: humphreyrobot at March 15, 2011 05:08 PM (EiH7n)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 05:09 PM (kUaEF)
Posted by: Dave in Texas at March 15, 2011 05:10 PM (Wh0W+)
Posted by: oldsailor's poet at March 15, 2011 05:10 PM (oBXlb)
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 05:11 PM (kUaEF)
A guy decides to do something about his small dick. So he has a length of baby elephant trunk implanted. After his rehab time is up, he decides to try it out, so he calls a girlfriend.
They're out at dinner, talking. When all of a sudden, his schlong whips out on its own, grabs a piece of bread and disappears under the table.
The girl is impressed. "Wow, do that again."
"I'd love to, but I don't think I can fit another dinner roll up my ass".
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 15, 2011 05:11 PM (yf5H9)
Plus, it pissed off the squirrel.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at March 15, 2011 05:12 PM (7utQ2)
There once was a squirrel from nantucket
His dick was so long he could suck it
Oh my dear he said with a lear
If my ear were a pussy i'd fuck it.
Oh God, I needed a good laugh today! LMAO!! That was hilarious!
Posted by: jewells45 at March 15, 2011 05:13 PM (Z71Vg)
164 My dick can do kung-fu.
Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at March 15, 2011 09:06 PM (7utQ2)
Would you like some Cream of Sum Yong Gai with that?
Posted by: CoolCzech at March 15, 2011 09:09 PM (kUaEF)
That's waaaaaacist.
Posted by: Long Duk Dong at March 15, 2011 05:13 PM (yf5H9)
Posted by: Guy who doesn't want to think up Brazilian wax joke at March 15, 2011 05:14 PM (YZISw)
Posted by: Andi Sullivan at March 15, 2011 05:18 PM (YVZlY)
Posted by: Stephanie at March 15, 2011 05:18 PM (geKgm)
Earlier I posted the parallels between the Pres of El S. and Obama. Both were elected because they were popular 'stars', the are both communists, their wives are communists (his wife is a big wig for the Worker's Party), etc.
Posted by: momma at March 15, 2011 05:21 PM (penCf)
Hey, thanks a lot for making it clear. I owe you one. Is it ok to place a link on my site pointing to yours? I have many visitors who will be rather riveted by your information. Thanks.
Stephanie | free walmart gift card
Posted by: Stephanie at March 15, 2011 09:18 PM (geKgm)
Stephanie like teh squirrel schlong.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 15, 2011 05:22 PM (yf5H9)
Posted by: CoolCzech channeling Alfred Hitchcock at March 15, 2011 08:55 PM (kUaEF)
Man, I loved making fun of her boobie belt
Posted by: momma at March 15, 2011 05:23 PM (penCf)
Posted by: arb at March 15, 2011 05:25 PM (J0lam)
Posted by: jewells45 at March 15, 2011 05:25 PM (Z71Vg)
Posted by: Austin Powers at March 15, 2011 05:26 PM (YVZlY)
Four ladies are golfing, The first one hits a slice that curves right towards a foursome of guys on the adjoining fairway.
One guy clutches his hands to his crotch and doubles over, rolling around in pain on the fairway.
The lady, who is a massage therapist, feels terrible and rushes to his aid. She starts massaging his crotch.
"Does that feel better?"
"Yes," he replies. "Now could you do that to my thumb?"
Posted by: ErikW at March 15, 2011 05:28 PM (M70T8)
Posted by: CMU VET at March 15, 2011 05:29 PM (I4r6d)
Posted by: Kensington at March 15, 2011 05:33 PM (mEyVv)
My dick is so big, that it has its own dick. And even my dick's dick is bigger than your dick.
Posted by: Squirrel Dick at March 15, 2011 05:36 PM (MtwBb)
Posted by: nerdygirl's squirrel hating beagle at March 15, 2011 05:42 PM (EyTr4)
Posted by: Long Squirrel at March 15, 2011 05:47 PM (/8mBu)
Posted by: jcjimi at March 15, 2011 05:55 PM (ay6+/)
Posted by: Catlady at March 15, 2011 08:16 PM (CyPWX)
Only because your such a shitty cook
Posted by: us squirrels at March 15, 2011 08:17 PM (0GFWk)
_________________________________________________
Come on over and park it in my attic!
You might change your mind, they love nuts!
Posted by: Catlady at March 15, 2011 06:06 PM (CyPWX)
How embarrassing. I didn't realize anyone got a photo.
Christine O'Donnell turned me into a squirrel (I got better), but certain things remained proportional.
Posted by: malclave at March 15, 2011 06:21 PM (OCRaO)
Is it a radioactive breadsitck? Or worse yet, is it a radioactive squirrel? Is it contained? Oh gawd, it's on fire! The thing is melting down!
Oh wait, no, it's ok.
Crap, I was wrong! Evacuate now! Take iodine pills!
Ok, now everything is under control. Never mind
***
Rinse, repeat.
-Sheppy Smith, sooper jeenius news reporter.
Posted by: Marmo at March 15, 2011 06:32 PM (1KSBb)
Posted by: Angela at March 15, 2011 07:00 PM (NsLYI)
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Posted by: KG at March 15, 2011 03:55 PM (2k/Dg)