Ace of Spades HQ

January 02, 2011

Overnight Open Thread - End of the Holidays Edition
— Maetenloch

In just two years Obama has golfed more than Bush did in all his eight years in the White House. And I'm pretty sure that Bush could still beat him at the drop of a hat. Of course when a Republican golfs, it's a sign he's an out-of-touch, elitist fat cat. When a Democrats plays the game, well he's just taking a much needed break from the rigors of the office.

How To Build A Fusion Reactor in Your Own Home
Designs based on the Farnsworth Fusor really do work and aren't that hard to build. Unfortunately they are hard to scale up to make power generation with them feasible. And yes the fusor was invented by Philo T. Farnsworth, the man who also invented television.

New Global Warmening Threat: Grolers!
And of course the mutant bears are all your fault.

Fox Destroyed Their Competitors in 2010
They were number one in news for the ninth year in a row:

...Not only did Fox News wallop MSNBC and CNN, it ranked fourth among all cable networks in primetime, behind USA, ESPN and TNT. (MSNBC was 28th, CNN 32nd and HLN 37th.)
Fox owned the top 12 cable news shows in average total viewers and swept the top 10 among 25-54-year-olds (MSNBC's "Countdown With Keith Olbermann" came in 13th and 11th, respectively). Even the nightly repeat of the Â“OÂ’Reilly FactorÂ” averaged more viewers than MSNBC and CNN shows.

Stay-at-home Moms: No Credit Cards For You
Thanks to last year's Credit Card act it's now much harder for people to qualify for credit based on their spouse's income.

The Credit Card Act signed into law last year was supposed to stop financial institutions from sleazy antics. But instead, some retailers say, it may restrict stay-at-home moms.
Dress Barn Inc., Home Depot Inc., Citigroup Inc. and other companies are urging the Federal Reserve to drop a proposed rule that would require credit-card issuers to consider only a borrower's "independent" income rather than household income. The new standard, which would apply to new credit-card accounts and requests to increase limits on existing accounts, could make it difficult for some customers to get credit on the spot, especially stay-at-home moms.

So Where Were The Slaves in 1860?

In 1864, drawing on the most recent 1860 Census data, the United States Coast Survey issued this choropleth map depicting counties with relatively high slave populations. President Lincoln was seen looking over the map so often that it was included in Francis Bicknell Carpenter's painting "President Lincoln Reading the Emancipation Proclamation to His Cabinet."

2011 Is The Year of the Rabbit
And even the kittehs are getting into it.

The Looming Military Recruitment Crisis
Less than a third of today's youth could actually qualify for military service:

Simply stated, too many of those in the prime demographic group targeted for enlistment (18-25 year-olds) don't quality for military service, for reasons ranging from obesity and other medical issues, to academic problems and past run-ins with the law. By some estimates, only 28% of young Americans in the prime enlistment cohort actually qualify for military service (emphasis ours).

And often their physical fitness is so low that many have to go to special pre-boot camp programs:

Â“YouÂ’d be surprised, the soldiers that we get today,Â” says Frank Palkoska, who directs the ArmyÂ’s fitness school. Â“They canÂ’t do simple motor function movements, like a shoulder roll, the ability to skip Â— so weÂ’ve got to lay a base of foundational fitness, without injuring them.Â”

Is Everything Bigger in Texas?
Well this study says yes - they do breed'em bigger in the country.

The One-Man Village People

Weekly AoSHQ Commenter Standings
Top 10 commenters:
1 [421 comments] 'CoolCzech' [59.08 posts/day]
2 [391 comments] 'CDR M'
3 [349 comments] 'toby928▒'
4 [331 comments] 'kbdabear'
5 [315 comments] 'NC Ref'
6 [308 comments] 'garrett'
7 [308 comments] 'Oldcat'
8 [305 comments] '18-1'
9 [293 comments] 'Vic'
10 [273 comments] 'Kratos (Ghost of Sparta)'

Top 10 sockpuppeteers:
1 [143 names] '18-1' [20.43 unique names/day]
2 [106 names] 'kbdabear'
3 [70 names] 'fluffy'
4 [69 names] 'Alexandria City Councilwoman Alicia Hughes (I)'
5 [53 names] 'toby928▒'
6 [53 names] 'Wyatt Earp'
7 [47 names] 'NC Ref'
9 [36 names] 'andycanuck'
10 [35 names] 'ya2daup'

The group. Yeah.

Tonight's post brought to you by Ann-Margret on a bike:

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to maetenloch at gmail. Otherwise send tips to Ace.

Posted by: Maetenloch at 05:54 PM | Comments (547)
Post contains 722 words, total size 8 kb.

1 7-9

Posted by: Editor at January 02, 2011 05:56 PM (YX6i/)

2 DAMN, why was I born 30 years after Ann-Margaret?

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 05:58 PM (tJjm/)

3 First!

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 05:58 PM (JOQVN)

4 Lovely. Washington senator dishonors a fallen soldier.

And Ann-Margret? Damn!

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at January 02, 2011 05:59 PM (v1p3a)

5 Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011

Starting this week's top comment run early, huh?

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at January 02, 2011 06:00 PM (v1p3a)

6 Aloha Morons.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:00 PM (8uDC8)

7 This is why we need to recruit the gheys- they're the last group in America that is concerned with keeping themselves fit...

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 06:01 PM (JOQVN)

8 Phew! Love that new thread smell!

Posted by: Y-not at January 02, 2011 06:01 PM (IDL9N)

9 Back when I joined the AF (1981), they were glad to have me because of my ASVAB scores. I was a college drop-out.

The recruiters said that many would-be recruits couldn't make it because they were illiterate, high school diploma notwithstanding.

Posted by: baldilocks at January 02, 2011 06:02 PM (T2/zQ)

10 6 Aloha Morons.

No drinky tonight?

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at January 02, 2011 06:02 PM (v1p3a)

11 Â“They canÂ’t do simple motor function movements, like a shoulder roll, the ability to skip..."

What the fuck?

Posted by: Bomber at January 02, 2011 06:03 PM (d88g9)

12 Well! I can finally do girl push-ups! So there!

/feels accomplished

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:03 PM (8uDC8)

13 Actually, that particular Fusor was in fact a proto-type IUD. It didn't quite pan out.

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:03 PM (tJjm/)

14 thh, you in Hawaii now?

No, just silly. Also, wishful thinking.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:03 PM (8uDC8)

15 No drinky tonight?

Why are you guys determined to turn me into an alcoholic? e_e

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:04 PM (8uDC8)

16 Keef Olberdouche - big fish, microscopic pond.

Posted by: Cicero at January 02, 2011 06:04 PM (Ys0KI)

17 What's a "shoulder roll"?

Posted by: USS Diversity at January 02, 2011 06:05 PM (DLxD/)

18 16 I don't know how many times I see/hear the teens on my street playing Madden football instead of you, you know, actually going to the park and playing it for real.

My kids are outside all the time, but they're usually alone. The other neighborhood kids are video-game junkies. It's sad.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at January 02, 2011 06:05 PM (v1p3a)

19 Â“They canÂ’t do simple motor function movements, like a shoulder roll, the ability to skip..."

What the fuck?

My question is, why did the Military find out they can't skip?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:05 PM (8uDC8)

20 hi all

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 06:05 PM (PaSAU)

21 Why are you guys determined to turn me into an alcoholic? e_e

Because you were a riot on NYE!

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at January 02, 2011 06:06 PM (v1p3a)

22 Rachel Madcow - small bovine, microscopic pond

Posted by: Cicero at January 02, 2011 06:06 PM (Ys0KI)

23 Why are you guys determined to turn me into an alcoholic? e_e

You'll fit in better here.

Posted by: Bomber at January 02, 2011 06:06 PM (d88g9)

24 Ann-Margaret and a Triumph Bonnie? I am so there for that....

Posted by: MrScribbler© at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (Ulu3i)

25 I think the results of tonight's game won't affect the standings much. If I weren't a lazy lump, I'd try to figure out if I managed to hold on to 5th place in League 6... But I'm pretty lazy.

Posted by: Y-not at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (IDL9N)

26 You'll fit in better here.

THIS!

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (v1p3a)

27 Shoulder rolls and skipping? Have they changed the physical test to accommodate teh gheys?

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (zxpIo)

28 Evening, Morons

Posted by: fluffy smells like socks at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (4Kl5M)

29 Why are you guys determined to turn me into an alcoholic? e_e Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 10:04 PM (8uDC Have you ever tried some rum?

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (tJjm/)

30 I don't know how many times I see/hear the teens on my street playing Madden football instead of you, you know, actually going to the park and playing it for real. Mindboggling.

I'm a video game junkie, but sports game I have never understood. Also, I feel this way about real sports. I'd rather play them than watch them. And this is coming from someone who has zero coordination and finds a way to trip over her own feet fairly frequently.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:07 PM (8uDC8)

31 Have you ever tried some rum?

Ugh. No rum for me. I had an unfortunate experience with some Captain Morgan one time.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:08 PM (8uDC8)

32 From the "Bigguns Country" story:

Â“The stretched penile length in the flaccid state was measured with a rigid tape from the pubopenile skin junction to the top of the penis Â… under maximal [yikes!] but not painful [phew!] extension. The penile circumference was measured at the base of the penis Â… with a measuring tape. For obese males, the abdominal adipose tissue [body fat] was shifted manually to one side to measure penile length and circumference.Â”

Now here's a scientific study that I wouldn't want to be involved in, in a direct, hands-on way of course,

.

/But now we now have a partial explanation why rural areas trend Republican. Or is it reverse causality - that because rural areas trend Republican causes males there to have bigger genitalia?

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 06:08 PM (c0A3e)

33 I see promise in Wii/Kinect/Move that video games that actually require getting off your ass to solve that particular problem ... but the problem is most fitness games are billed as being just that, fitness games. When will the developers of the world learn that kids won't do something that's good for them if they're AWARE it's good for them.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 06:09 PM (XiSOm)

34 Nice bike.

Posted by: Robert Patrick at January 02, 2011 06:09 PM (ybA9f)

35 Because you were a riot on NYE!

...I should probably go back and read that thread and find out just how crazy I got. It's weird that my ability to type does not seem to be affected much by ungodly amounts of Kahlua.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:09 PM (8uDC8)

36 Happy New Year folksies! Hope all is well in Moronlandia.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 06:10 PM (fa9yq)

37 Good evening ladies and germs.

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 06:10 PM (3TjSM)

38 Keefums placed number 13. I can't even name 4 news shows so in my book Keef came in 13th out of 4.

I'm pretty sure that is pretty bad....Gaylord Fokker bad.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at January 02, 2011 06:10 PM (54F2e)

39 Why CC, you've beaten me. I should get used to this feeling. My New Year's resolution is to graduate and get another sheepskin before chaos envelops the world.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 06:10 PM (c0A3e)

40 I believe I shall move to rural Texas.

Yowzer!

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 06:11 PM (3TjSM)

41 Best ONT of the year!!

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 06:11 PM (ybA9f)

42 Â“The stretched penile length in the flaccid state was measured with a rigid tape from the pubopenile skin junction to the top of the penis Â… under maximal [yikes!] but not painful [phew!] extension. The penile circumference was measured at the base of the penis Â… with a measuring tape. For obese males, the abdominal adipose tissue [body fat] was shifted manually to one side to measure penile length and circumference.Â”

Eurgh. I'm always so confused by people who volunteer to be part of these studies.

Or is it reverse causality - that because rural areas trend Republican causes males there to have bigger genitalia?

^ This.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:11 PM (8uDC8)

Obama golfs more than Chimpy? The racists are finding a lot to complain about these days. They probably wish he was kept off golf courses or something.

Posted by: Ignorant Libtard at January 02, 2011 06:11 PM (bdXiI)

44 They canÂ’t do simple motor function movements, like a shoulder roll

If you can't do the shoulder roll or the flying leg kick, you're beneath contempt

Posted by: James T Kirk at January 02, 2011 06:12 PM (vdfwz)

45 nice trumpet Ann Margret's sittin on.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 06:12 PM (eCAn3)

46 Would an urban man's gonads increase in size if he moved to the country?

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 06:13 PM (c0A3e)

47 38 Nice bike.

yea thats what I thought and Ann Margret enhances the value

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 06:13 PM (3OCZw)

48 If you can't do the shoulder roll or the flying leg kick, you're beneath contempt

Yeah, but do you have the ability to skip, Captain?

Posted by: Bomber at January 02, 2011 06:13 PM (d88g9)

49 12 Â“They canÂ’t do simple motor function movements, like a shoulder roll, the ability to skip..."

What the fuck?

Posted by: Bomber at January 02, 2011 10:03 PM (d88g9)

Post DADT training regimen.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 06:13 PM (eCAn3)

50 You are so young CDR.

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 06:13 PM (3TjSM)

51 Obama golfs more than Chimpy? The racists are finding a lot to complain about these days. They probably wish he was kept off golf courses or something.

When Chimpy was in office, they didn't let blacks play.

Posted by: Typical Libtard at January 02, 2011 06:14 PM (v1p3a)

52 I am going to be able to do push-ups one of these days. /shakes fist

And if I get that far, I will move on to my arch-nemesis..... the pull-up! :O *gasp*

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:14 PM (8uDC8)

53 That's redundant, Uncle. She's a Sportster Babe.

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 06:15 PM (ybA9f)

54

I'm first by a landslide in the Cornell graduate demographic, so suck it bitches!

Posted by: Keith Olbermann at January 02, 2011 06:15 PM (vdfwz)

55 While I never had any sort of induction testing (is that what it's called?), I would imagine more of the push-ups, pull-ups, run a few laps sort of thing. Definitely never pictured a squad of new recruits skipping and shoulder rolling . . . until now. And I can't stop laughing.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:15 PM (zxpIo)

56 soon you will be doin the rope climb with one hand

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 06:15 PM (3OCZw)

57 59 That's redundant, Uncle. She's a Sportster Babe.

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 10:15 PM (ybA9f)

'cept she's parked that magnificent ass on what I'm pretty sure is a pre-unit TR-6

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 06:16 PM (eCAn3)

58 g'evening, 'rons

Posted by: AltonJackson at January 02, 2011 06:16 PM (jzOkH)

59 I'm first by a landslide in the Cornell graduate demographic, so suck it bitches!

Don't you mean Cornell A&M?

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at January 02, 2011 06:16 PM (54F2e)

60 I guess PE doesn't really exist in public schools any more?

I was chunky (still made weight) going into bootcamp and got beat extra good because of it, but I sure as shit could skip

Posted by: Zakn at January 02, 2011 06:16 PM (zyaZ1)

61 that bike would make a good cafe racer project

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 06:16 PM (3OCZw)

62 54 If you can't do the shoulder roll or the flying leg kick, you're beneath contempt

Yeah, but do you have the ability to skip, Captain?
Posted by: Bomber at January 02, 2011 10:13 PM

I won the Starfleet Academy Skipping Trophy!

Posted by: Lt Sulu at January 02, 2011 06:17 PM (vdfwz)

63 43 Why CC, you've beaten me.Â I should get used to this feeling.Â My New Year's resolution is to graduate and get another sheepskin before chaos envelops the world.Â Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 10:10 PM (c0A3e) Yeah, a pack of sheepskins should keep the doctor away, Kratos!

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:17 PM (tJjm/)

64 Wait, people can't do shoulder rolls? Don't you just kind of roll your shoulders?

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 06:17 PM (XiSOm)

65 Posted by: Lt Sulu at January 02, 2011

Oh my!

Posted by: George Takei at January 02, 2011 06:17 PM (v1p3a)

66 Shoulder rolls & skipping? Guess they've been planning on the repeal of DADT for a while.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 06:18 PM (KqBTY)

67 nice trumpet Ann Margret's sittin on.

Those saddlebags are particularly bad-ass.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:18 PM (zxpIo)

68 Â“YouÂ’d be surprised, the soldiers that we get today,Â” says Frank Palkoska, who directs the ArmyÂ’s fitness school. Â“They canÂ’t do simple motor function movements, like a shoulder roll, the ability to skip Â— so weÂ’ve got to lay a base of foundational fitness, without injuring them.Â”

No, I wouldn't be surprised at all. My daughter graduated from Army boot camp at Ft. Jackson in 2008 - my husband and I were amazed at the number of overweight (not pudgy, overweight) soldiers graduating with her unit. Hubby is a retired Marine, I spent four years in the Air Force, and neither of us can remember anyone graduating from boot camp over their max weight.
Five of the six "outstanding PT" awards given out went to females. Nothing wrong with that, but I can remember when the guys could at least hold their own.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:18 PM (Rwudm)

'cept she's parked that magnificent ass on what I'm pretty sure is a pre-unit TR-6

Good Eye. Didn't she ride Joe Namath's bitchpad?

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 06:18 PM (ybA9f)

70 I can do one jumping jack, skip a little, and the meanest shoulder roll you ever saw

But first they make me leave California

Posted by: Michael Moore at January 02, 2011 06:19 PM (vdfwz)

71 might be a tiger too, from the movie The Swinger in '66.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 06:19 PM (eCAn3)

72 Simply stated, too many of those in the prime demographic group targeted for enlistment (18-25 year-olds) don't quality for military service, for reasons ranging from obesity and other medical issues, to academic problems and past run-ins with the law.

I'm confused. John F'ing Kerry implied that only stupid people go into the military (and get stuck in Iraq)...

Obvious conclusion - Horse-face was wrong yet again.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 06:19 PM (c0A3e)

57 [redacted] rounds of golf and he's still a Shankapotomous.

Clinton had men that would look the other when he'd kick his ball back onto the fairway.

Obams is apparently surrounded by a bunch of 'yes men' that tell him he's getting better.

I wonder if these younger 'yes men' were trained by the 'yes men' of yesteryear. You know, the ones from Indonesia, Hawaii, Los Angeles, NYC, Boston, Chicago, DC.....

Affirmative Action is neat, ain't it?!

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:20 PM (R76Xe)

74 52 Would an urban man's gonads increase in size if he moved to the country? Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 10:13 PM (c0A3e) Depends where he sticks 'em, I suppose. They might change color, too.

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:20 PM (tJjm/)

Good Eye. Didn't she ride Joe Namath's bitchpad?

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 10:18 PM (ybA9f)

she may have, although she was known to own a triumph of her own as well.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 06:20 PM (eCAn3)

76 Evening ya'll how was new years? Just a comment on the recruit problem... Another problem is the quality of soldiers/marines that are being let in. Generally we're seeing a lot of new guys that are soft ass bitches. I mean privates committing suicide after a generally "easy" deployment vs a staff nco that was at the battle of fallujah or ramadi plus a couple deployments under there belts. privates that bitch and complain and an NCO that can't fuck em up because of worries about hazing. Combine that with lower standards (to accomodate females and get numbers) in Infantry Basic (no women in the infantry yet...), Airborne School, etc and we're going to have a serious problem. It's a reflection on my generation. This whole me first, too dependent on technology at a young age, self entitled bullshit needs to stop. Ok rant off

Posted by: Marion "Cobra" Cobretti at January 02, 2011 06:20 PM (sCGdc)

77 @65 HOW DARE YOU, SIR! I gave up my spot and chose to attend Kornell Kow Kollege because it would have been wrong for a white man like myself to attend a prestigious university like Cornell.

Posted by: Keeth Olberdick at January 02, 2011 06:21 PM (bdXiI)

78 yeah that's a t100c tiger she's sitting on from the Swinger movie.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 06:21 PM (eCAn3)

Posted by: Michael Moore at January 02, 2011 10:19 PM (vdfwz)

Stay away from Guam! It is already in danger of capsizing!

Posted by: Hank Johnson at January 02, 2011 06:22 PM (c0A3e)

80 Training Film: Fighting a much stronger but slower opponent

Posted by: Starfleet Academy at January 02, 2011 06:22 PM (vdfwz)

Oh I just realized.... a round of golf for every state in the union!

Yay!

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:22 PM (R76Xe)

82 This whole me first, too dependent on technology at a young age, self entitled bullshit needs to stop.

Right after we issue all the new recruits their own smartphones.

Posted by: The Army at January 02, 2011 06:23 PM (d88g9)

83 I could use one of them thar fusion reactors on my bicycle

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 06:24 PM (3OCZw)

84 Ann-Margaret puts today's greyhounds with fake tits to shame

Now, excuse me while I prepare my bunk

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 06:24 PM (vdfwz)

85 "C. C. Rider" starring Joe Namath and Ann Margaret. Hell, he was probably drunk.

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 06:25 PM (ybA9f)

86 Yeah Ann Margaret was a dish, wasn't she?

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:25 PM (R76Xe)

Right after we issue all the new recruits their own smartphones.
-----------------------

Well I need death dealing tattooed killers.

Posted by: Marion "Cobra" Cobretti at January 02, 2011 06:26 PM (sCGdc)

More soldiers than you think will graduate Basic Training unable to do a single pull-up. What I saw there wasn't as bad as the article, but it wasn't very good.

Back to Shawshank Fort Jackson for me tomorrow. I'll miss you Morons for another three weeks.

Posted by: Cincinnatus at January 02, 2011 06:26 PM (sHytz)

89 Haiti doesn't have many if any golf courses, does it?

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 06:26 PM (vdfwz)

90 Oh, I thought you were talking about Hubert J. Farnsworth. He bought his nuclear reactor from IKEA. The only tools neccessary to assemble it were a hammer, screwdriver and a bender unit. They did so with several parts left over. It blew him through a wall.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 06:27 PM (R97p5)

91 Right after we issue all the new recruits their own smartphones.

Posted by: The Army at January 02, 2011 10:23 PM (d88g9)

Hell, they let 'em keep the ones they've got when they get to Ft. Jackson - my kid called home at least every other day to talk to her son, and when I asked her where the hell she was calling from (different area code every time) she said she was using someone's cell phone. A cell phone!! In boot camp!! She said they let 'em have them as long as they shared their minutes with people who didn't have/bring theirs.

Jeebus, we used to get "patio breaks" once in a while, you had to stand in line to use a pay phone and if you didn't get a turn before time to fall in, tough shit.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:27 PM (Rwudm)

92 84 yeah that's a t100c tiger she's sitting on from the Swinger movie. Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 10:21 PM (eCAn3) Think she'd bike with Progressive Flo? VROOM! VROOM!!

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:27 PM (tJjm/)

93 Random question to Moron nation...

Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 06:28 PM (DwhA2)

More soldiers than you think will graduate Basic Training unable to do a single pull-up. What I saw there wasn't as bad as the article, but it wasn't very good.

----

When I went to Airborne School back in 2005 right out of Infantry Basic at Benning it was know long required to do 6 pullups but a flexed arm hang so females could get through

Posted by: Marion at January 02, 2011 06:28 PM (sCGdc)

Haiti doesn't have many if any golf courses, does it?

Or the Gulf Coast? (No wait, I recall he may have played a round there when he went on his "hey everyone vacation down there" stint. memba that. I think the spent a total of nine hours down there).

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:29 PM (R76Xe)

Back to Shawshank Fort Jackson for me tomorrow. I'll miss you Morons for another three weeks.

Basic Training, E-10-2, April 1975. Promoted out of basic. Slow bus to Fort Polk (Little Vietnam) in the summer. Lost 25lbs. in 12 weeks. Good Times!

Posted by: Tommy Gunnar at January 02, 2011 06:29 PM (ybA9f)

More soldiers than you think will graduate Basic Training unable to do a single pull-up. What I saw there wasn't as bad as the article, but it wasn't very good.

Back to Shawshank Fort Jackson for me tomorrow. I'll miss you Morons for another three weeks.

Posted by: Cincinnatus at January 02, 2011 10:26 PM (sHytz)

How the hell can you graduate basic and not being able to do a pull-up?

Jeebus.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 06:30 PM (KqBTY)

98 Give me 13 weeks with those butterballs and I'll have them skipping through the obstacle course with Jeeps tied to their backs

Posted by: Sgt Hartman at January 02, 2011 06:30 PM (vdfwz)

99 2011 Prediction: I'll wake up tomorrow at six and drag my weary carcass to work, where I'll spend half my day productively cruising the Net.

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:30 PM (tJjm/)

100 Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 10:28 PM (DwhA2)

Well, sure, you could ask. Just don't get all pissed off when they pick c) none of the above.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:31 PM (Rwudm)

101 100
Just a little over the top.

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 06:31 PM (3TjSM)

102 Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

...yeah kinda. Unless they're okay with something really cheap.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:31 PM (8uDC8)

103 Do people actually ask for presents?

Posted by: Editor at January 02, 2011 06:32 PM (YX6i/)

104

Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

Yes.Far away weddings like that indicate they are trying to weed out certain people they don't want to dis-invite. That's why we eloped.

Posted by: USS Diversity at January 02, 2011 06:32 PM (DLxD/)

105

Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

Yes.

The gift is their attendance.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:32 PM (R76Xe)

106

My question is, why did the Military find out they can't skip?

I've never been in the military but, have you tried to skip lately? It takes a bit of coordination to do so and can wear you out quite quickly. Plus, I'm just spitballing here but perhaps asking a fella to do a skip is just one of the ways to teach a new recruit who's who and reinforce the whole when I say skip, you say how fast kind of theme.

Posted by: jmflynny at January 02, 2011 06:33 PM (piMMO)

107

Yeah... my 19 year old Son graduated Navy Boot 2 months ago... was home on leave for Christmas...

Went running a couple of times and he still can't outrun his old man...

I used to argue with my X Girlfreind, who was a Middle School Teacher about PE, and how we had it every day when I was growing up... but now they say they can't "AFFORD" it? Even though we pay more per student than almost anyone else in the world...

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 06:33 PM (AdK6a)

108 Barry Soetoro: man of the people.

Posted by: toby928™ at January 02, 2011 06:33 PM (S5YRY)

109 @100: YES. That's really tacky.

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:33 PM (tJjm/)

110

No, I wouldn't be surprised at all. My daughter graduated from Army boot camp at Ft. Jackson in 2008 - my husband and I were amazed at the number of overweight (not pudgy, overweight) soldiers graduating with her unit. Hubby is a retired Marine, I spent four years in the Air Force, and neither of us can remember anyone graduating from boot camp over their max weight.
Five of the six "outstanding PT" awards given out went to females. Nothing wrong with that, but I can remember when the guys could at least hold their own.

The PT scores are scaled by age and sex, and I think they scaled it too far down for the females ... but they're probably not going to change it just because of the outliers.

Posted by: Cincinnatus at January 02, 2011 06:33 PM (sHytz)

111 World's Hardest Golf Courses

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 06:34 PM (vdfwz)

112

Posted by: jmflynny at January 02, 2011 10:33 PM (piMMO)

I'm hoping the skip part means, maybe, a rope.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 06:34 PM (KqBTY)

113

I'll get those candy asses in shape.

Posted by: Gunny Thomas Highway at January 02, 2011 06:34 PM (4FGpb)

114

that bike would make a good cafe racer project

Nope. Restoration. With the possible exception of the wire baskets, unless they came from the factory, which I kinda doubt.

And thanks to Ann-Margaret for getting me thru puberty.

And for doing Elvis.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at January 02, 2011 06:34 PM (b6qrg)

115 100 Random question to Moron nation...

Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

Yes. Their presence is their gift, at that cost.

Posted by: Hank Johnson at January 02, 2011 06:34 PM (c0A3e)

116 Random question to Moron nation...

You're kidding, right? Skip the wedding, send a card and something medium-pricey from their gimme list.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:35 PM (zxpIo)

117 What's a "shoulder roll"?

I think that is a judo roll, where you fall forward, rolling over one shoulder and across your back to the other hip and then to standing.

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 06:35 PM (JOQVN)

118 Where were the slaves???

Averlap that map (or similar census decades) with current blue/purple/red maps of recent elections..

Posted by: Druid at January 02, 2011 06:36 PM (RnujI)

119 Just for the record, I'm not the one getting married. A good friend of mine - who I introduced to his fiancee and both of whom are now neighbors of mine - are planning to get married in Florida, as she loves the beach.

I spent several grand - and a week of leave - to go on a wedding cruise for better friends last year. I didn't enjoy it all that much, and I resent the fact the the fiancee is hanging over my head the fact that my buddy may ask me to be in the wedding, though he hasn't asked, and I don't expect him to do so. Personally, I think the whole thing is kind of shitty, as they're doing it to save money as opposed to having a larger local wedding and having to invite all of their extended family.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 06:36 PM (DwhA2)

120

Posted by: jmflynny at January 02, 2011 10:33 PM (piMMO)

Ret. US Navy Enlisted... used to run Fat Boy programs (hmmm... probably can't call em that anymore... LOL)...

Can't ever remember "skipping'... except maybe a few meals....

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 06:36 PM (AdK6a)

121

Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

No. Over the top would be asking a friend to travel from Florida to Ohio, for any reason.

Posted by: mark c at January 02, 2011 06:36 PM (SBIko)

122 I think that is a judo roll, where you fall forward, rolling over one shoulder and across your back to the other hip and then to standing.

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 10:35 PM (JOQVN)

Maybe for you, but I'm thinking it's just the normal 'pick your shoulders up, roll back, then forward'.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 06:37 PM (KqBTY)

123 21 What's a "shoulder roll"? Posted by: USS Diversity at January 02, 2011 10:05 PM

Who is this plebe !!!

Posted by: James T Kirk at January 02, 2011 06:37 PM (vdfwz)

124 114

My question is, why did the Military find out they can't skip?

Skipping can determine fast muscle twitch and balance. You stand on one foot and hop....land, then shift feet. If someone can't skip, alot of fine motor stuff ain't working. Just sayin'. Nothing makes you say "oh shit" faster than working with someone who can't skip.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 06:37 PM (fa9yq)

125

Posted by: James T Kirk at January 02, 2011 06:38 PM (vdfwz)

126

Maybe for you, but I'm thinking it's just the normal 'pick your shoulders up, roll back, then forward'.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 10:37 PM (KqBTY)

Steph, that's what I am picturing, too. That sort of shimmy you do when you're not quite dancing but definitely thinking about it.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:39 PM (zxpIo)

127 No. Over the top would be asking a friend to travel from Florida to Ohio, for any reason.

Well said.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 06:39 PM (DwhA2)

128 124 Random question to Moron nation... You're kidding, right?Â Skip the wedding, send a card and ~~something medium-pricey from their gimme list.~~ blow the $1,000 on a nice huge screen plasma TV for yourself. Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 10:35 PM (zxpIo) Edited that for ya, Peaches!

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:39 PM (tJjm/)

129 Evening all

Posted by: robtr skipping onto the ONT at January 02, 2011 06:39 PM (hVDig)

130

I think Destination Weddings are pretty selfish 90% of the time. Unless it's just family and you can coordinate it as a group vaca.

I mean, most people can (at best) afford one vaca a year. And work schedules a lot of times will dictate only a once a year vacation.

I think it's rude to expect your guests (ie, friends) to blow their time and money and your one day.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:39 PM (R76Xe)

131

Shoulder rolls are moving your shoulders around. Kind of like shrugging. Unless you are quadriplegic, or a democrat, you can do it.

Posted by: Gunny Thomas Highway at January 02, 2011 06:39 PM (4FGpb)

132 Maybe for you, but I'm thinking it's just the normal 'pick your shoulders up, roll back, then forward'.

Nah, I don't think their that bad. I can see a lot of kids who can't do a forward roll properly, which means that they have trouble with coordination, and that they are more likely to end up injured if they have a fall.

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 06:41 PM (JOQVN)

133 Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 10:36 PM (DwhA2)

Then I'd tell them no, sorry, I can't possibly travel that distance at that expense AND give you a gift. If you're asked to be in the wedding and accept, they should consider that to be your gift to the bride and groom. Otherwise, send 'em a nice gift card from someplace they wouldn't ordinarily be able to afford to shop at, and let it go at that.
Just my opinion.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:41 PM (Rwudm)

134

See. Nobody knows.

"Plebe" indeed.

Posted by: USS Diversity at January 02, 2011 06:41 PM (DLxD/)

135 132 21 What's a "shoulder roll"? Posted by: USS Diversity at January 02, 2011 10:05 PM

Who is this plebe !!!

Posted by: James T Kirk at January 02, 2011 10:37 PM (vdfwz)

Well... it does help...

Posted by: Capt. Peter Quincy Taggert at January 02, 2011 06:41 PM (AdK6a)

136 I suppose the wedding situation would depend on how many weddings you have had and just how many fucking blenders your friends are supposed to buy you.

Posted by: kansas at January 02, 2011 06:41 PM (4FGpb)

137 I used to argue with my X Girlfreind, who was a Middle School Teacher about PE, and how we had it every day when I was growing up... but now they say they can't "AFFORD" it? Even though we pay more per student than almost anyone else in the world...

Well, you know. Speaking as someone who used to be a chubby middle school/high school kid. PE did not help me get into shape, or do anything for me at all, other than embarass the shit out of me every day of my life and make high school suck more than it already did. You know what did get me over that? When I decided, on my own, that I was tired of being fat, and I wanted to be able to catch a fucking ball when someone throws it. Does anyone really think anything the school can do is going to make up for the kid sitting on his ass playing xbox 20 hours a day and eating forty eleven cheeseburgers?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:42 PM (8uDC8)

138 140

Shoulder rolls are moving your shoulders around. Kind of like shrugging. Unless you are quadriplegic, or a democrat, you can do it.

Yep, but there are those who give you a blank look and then move like Bill Murray crossing streams in Ghostsbusters. They can't isolate parts of their body.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 06:42 PM (fa9yq)

139 Obama has toothpick legs.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 06:42 PM (+u2hn)

140 124 Random question to Moron nation...

You're kidding, right? Skip the wedding, send a card and something medium-pricey from their gimme list. blow the $1,000 on a nice huge screen plasma TV for yourself.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 10:35 PM (zxpIo)

Edited that for ya, Peaches!

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 10:39 PM (tJjm/)

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:43 PM (Rwudm)

141

I had a friend get married the day after Thanksgiving (who does it on a Friday)? She wanted all her bridesmaids to be there for the rehearsal the night before......which of course was Turkey Day.

I said no way in hell. I'd be there Friday (which was already cutting into my family time). I told her I knew how to walk dowon a f*$&ing aisle - I could figure out the rest. . She kicked me out of her wedding

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:43 PM (R76Xe)

142 I thought a shoulder roll was a delicious pork sandwich. What do you mean drop down and give me 20?

Posted by: modern recruit at January 02, 2011 06:45 PM (SBIko)

143 100 Random question to Moron nation...

Ummm..... Yeah!

Posted by: Shannow at January 02, 2011 06:45 PM (hosB8)

144 to help with the shoulder roll confusion. it's a no shit roll your shoulders. not a cheetah flip or anything crazy. When you go to the MEPs station they have you do a bunch of tests... like roll shoulders, move different body parts, duck walk, skip etc. It's an issue of being able to do basic motor skills

Posted by: Marion at January 02, 2011 06:45 PM (sCGdc)

145

Good for you! BTW, I believe that the more selfish the wedding, the quicker the divorce.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 06:45 PM (fa9yq)

146 She kicked me out of her wedding

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 10:43 PM (R76Xe)

See? Problem solved.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:45 PM (Rwudm)

147 She kicked me out of her wedding

Was that the plan?

My parents got married on Christmas (before my time). Now it's 41 years later, and they still don't know why they picked that day.

Posted by: Bomber at January 02, 2011 06:46 PM (d88g9)

148 Yes.Far away weddings like that indicate they are trying to weed out certain people they don't want to dis-invite. That's why we eloped.

I hate weddings. If I ever get married I'm eloping and blowing some of the money it would have cost on a kickass honeymoon. Which is the only part that matters.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:46 PM (8uDC8)

149 I can't believe 74% of the comments on this thread involve shoulder rolls!

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:46 PM (R76Xe)

150

We got a bunch of history buffs here in the MoronNation.

Do you guys think it was the issue of slavery that the North and South were fighting over? Or was it the issue of States rights? I.E., could states succeed, or was that forbidden?

Personally, I think it was slavery. I don't believe that people would accept 500,000 plus dead over an issue as dry as States rights.

Lincoln said to the lady who wrote Uncle Toms Cabin "So you're the little lady who wrote the book that started this great big war."

That song that goes "As He died to make men holy let us die to make men free." Doesn't seem like an ode about states rights.

My father comes down on the states rights thing. He laughs at the idea that freeing the slaves had anything to do with it. And he'll quote that bit about how if he could preserve the Union without freeing the slaves, he'd do it.

Anyway, my father is a raging asshole. He rags on liberals and democrats ALL the time. Because my mothers side of the family are all blue collar democrats. So he rags on them constantly, for wanting to tax and spend. The infuriating part of it, is that he is truely a RINO thru and thru. All of his political positions are liberal democrat, except for maybe immigration. Maybe...

But he takes these positions just to be an asshole and throw it in their faces.

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 06:46 PM (QLhy5)

151 We have friends who's son invited people along for a cruise ship wedding. AND wanted gifts. It really is aself-centered, inconsiderate thing to do, subjecting friends to financial hardship & wasting their vacation days for the sake of someone else's wedding. Not to mention that getting married on a Carnival cruise is pretty cheesy, anyway.

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 06:46 PM (tJjm/)

152

Male Morons might appreciate this picture of crosstit crossfit women doing a pull-up.

I'll be making my bunk.

Posted by: Cincinnatus at January 02, 2011 06:46 PM (sHytz)

153

Does anyone really think anything the school can do is going to make up for the kid sitting on his ass playing xbox 20 hours a day and eating forty eleven cheeseburgers?

The key is starting them early, like first grade. You know, how we used to do it.

Children do three things very well: eat, sleep and play. My elementary school had us in PE for an hour and we had two 20 recesses every day. We ran off our excess energy and actually paid attention in class. Somehow, this got lost and I'm not sure why.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at January 02, 2011 06:47 PM (b6qrg)

154 149 148 Obama has toothpick legs.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 10:42 PM (+u2hn)

Hell, my legs are better.

Posted by: The Chicken at January 02, 2011 10:43 PM (5I8G0)

How you doin'?

Wait.........

Posted by: booger at January 02, 2011 06:48 PM (9RFH1)

155 Was that the plan?

Well not intially.....! But by the time it was all said and done she booted two other (sane) girls. She's not divorced (yet). But she doesn't have a lot of girlfriends anymore.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:48 PM (R76Xe)

156 She kicked me out of her wedding

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 10:43 PM (R76Xe)

That is a beautiful story, lacey. I am slack-jawed with admiration!

The last wedding I was obliged to attend, they sent out this fuckin' poem in the invitations that flat-out demanded money.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:48 PM (zxpIo)

157 Nah, I don't think their that bad. I can see a lot of kids who can't do a forward roll properly, which means that they have trouble with coordination, and that they are more likely to end up injured if they have a fall.

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 10:41 PM (JOQVN)

You're probably right, but considering it was in the same sentence as skipping...

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 06:48 PM (KqBTY)

158 The Farnsworth Fusor? Great for swingin' sex parties. Five, count 'em - FIVE HOLES!

Posted by: Dang at January 02, 2011 06:49 PM (TXKVh)

159 I can see a lot of kids who can't do a forward roll properly, which means that they have trouble with coordination, and that they are more likely to end up injured if they have a fall.

.... pfft, I couldn't do that. The falls and rolls and things are one of the major reasons I've never taken a martial art, even though I really really want to. Also, because trusting a random stranger to flip me over his head scares the ever loving crap out of me.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:49 PM (8uDC8)

160 For the record, my friends are getting married on a Friday, and they chose the hotel (not a cheap hotel - $200 a night for the discounted wedding rate ) based on the fact that her friend's family owns it. On top of that, they want all their "close friends" to come down early in the week and hit Disneyworld and a few select other destinations. Which means I would have to take an entire week off work.

I consider myself a fairly generous personal, but I'm getting a little fed up, considering another couple I introduced are getting married the same month in Jamaica, but aren't even asking family and friends to attend. They're doing a small reception once they get back.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 06:50 PM (DwhA2)

161

But he takes these positions just to be an asshole and throw it in their faces.

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 10:46 PM (QLhy5)

It's my understanding that it was about slaves in the Kansas Territories. Lincoln offered to the south that they could keep their slaves but any new territories would be slave free.

Posted by: robtr skipping onto the ONT at January 02, 2011 06:50 PM (hVDig)

162 I'd tell anyone who wanted me in their wedding that I'll do it if they can do a shoulder roll

Posted by: USS Diversity at January 02, 2011 06:50 PM (DLxD/)

163

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 10:42 PM (8uDC

I think it would depend on the way the class was run...

If its run as a time waster to play games in??? no..

But like my High School PE classes, where they actually TAUGHT both fitness and technique for various sports...

But heck, even if it gets them off their butts for an hour a day... it'll do at least some good...

I've tried to get my 19 year old Daughter in shape for YEARS... and cannot motivate her to work out... but... going on a hike? Going for a bike ride in the Moutains? Snow Skiing? those she will do...

My Son, her twin, now in the Navy, was much easier as I got him interested in Fencing when he was 9... and by the time he was 15 he could take many of the adults we practiced with..

As you said... its about motivation... but it helps if you give them an opportunity to get motivated...

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 06:50 PM (AdK6a)

164 Skipping is a good drill for runners, particularly sprinters. It builds explosive strength in the ankles and calves.

Just sayin'

Posted by: toby928™ at January 02, 2011 06:50 PM (S5YRY)

165 I hate weddings. If I ever get married I'm eloping and blowing some of the money it would have cost on a kickass honeymoon. Which is the only part that matters.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 10:46 PM (8uDC

I've basically done this twice - first time, I was stationed in England, my ex came over on leave for a month, we got married right after he got there and spent the rest of the time on our "honeymoon" (which in this case is code for "the whole f'ing base went on alert the day after the wedding and stayed that way for two weeks").

Second time, hubby and I got married by a preacher friend of ours, right after Wednesday night church services. Told our respective moms two weeks later. Much less hassle that way.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 06:51 PM (Rwudm)

166

The key is starting them early, like first grade. You know, how we used to do it.

....when did they stop doing that? I had recess in fifth grade and this was.... uhm.. 1997?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 06:52 PM (8uDC8)

167 Do they live in Florida, or are they traveling there specifically for the wedding? I'm getting married this summer, in Colorado because I live here, and due to the fact that both the husband-to-be and I have family scattered across the globe, people are going to have to travel, and not everyone will be able to make it, and that's okay. As for gifts, we haven't even thought about a registry yet ... I hate asking for stuff ... so I'd say it's probably okay not to give anything, but if your friends are the easily butthurt types, best get them something small from Target to make it look like you care

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 06:52 PM (XiSOm)

168 Personally, I think it was slavery. I don't believe that people would accept 500,000 plus dead over an issue as dry as States rights.

Even with the Emancipation Proclamation four slave states were in the Union and stayed that way until the 13th Amendment was enacted

"If I could preserve the Union without freeing one slave, I would do it" - Lincoln

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 06:53 PM (vdfwz)

169 When adults skip that's called plyometrics. But if they said that, nobody would know what they were talking about so they called it skipping.

Posted by: delmar at January 02, 2011 06:53 PM (d9sox)

170 I sthkip everywhere I go.

Posted by: Bwaney Fwank at January 02, 2011 06:53 PM (KDwap)

171 That's what a like about you lacey, no bullshit.

My kinda gal.

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 06:53 PM (3TjSM)

172 Not to mention that getting married on a Carnival cruise is pretty cheesy, anyway.

Yeah, my other friends did that. The ship sucked - only 1 swimming pool - and the cruise docked in Nassau on Good Friday. All the liquor stores were closed.

Wedding Fail

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 06:53 PM (DwhA2)

173 Peaches, if I ever get married, I want to invite you just so I can put next to Dress: (Optional, Pants) on the invite

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 06:54 PM (R76Xe)

174 They're doing a small reception once they get back.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 10:50 PM (DwhA2)

Expecting people to attend a destination wedding is 100% tacky unless the happy couple is providing transportation, lodging and meals. If they live in Ohio and need to get married in Florida, having a reception when they return is the correct way to do it.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 06:54 PM (zxpIo)

175 151

I had a friend get married the day after Thanksgiving (who does it on a Friday)? She wanted all her bridesmaids to be there for the rehearsal the night before......which of course was Turkey Day.

You know, I'm an inconsiderate son of a bitch. But that friend of yours sounds like the most self centered, selfish person I've ever heard of. Polite company outside of prison, of course...

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 06:55 PM (QLhy5)

176 179 Do they live in Florida, or are they traveling there specifically for the wedding?

They live in Ohio (south of Dayton), across the street from me. All of their immediate family members - and most of their friends - live in Ohio, as well.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 06:56 PM (DwhA2)

177 Give them some towels.

Posted by: toby928™ at January 02, 2011 06:56 PM (S5YRY)

178 A gift is expected no matter what. But no one should actually say, "I expect a gift from you." Give them a card and drop a gift card in it. I wouldn't go to the wedding if it's so far away. But I run with people of pretty modest income.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 06:56 PM (+u2hn)

179 kbdabear. when Lincoln said that he was talking to New Yorkers who were then same as now democrats. He tailored his speech to his audience.

Posted by: delmar at January 02, 2011 06:57 PM (d9sox)

180

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 10:52 PM (8uDC

Did you still have PE? Was it required or optional?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at January 02, 2011 06:57 PM (b6qrg)

181 Agreeing with THH on the gym class thing. Only thing that elementary/middle school gym did for me was get me to hate exercise with a seething passion. I was scrawny as hell and the only sport I was reasonable at was dodge ball, for the same reason I was horrid at all the other sports -- if a big red ball came flying at me, my first instinct was to get the hell out of the way. I didn't actually start enjoying exercise until college when I discovered rock climbing and those awesome elliptical machines at the school rec center. I still suck pretty hard at organized sports.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 06:58 PM (XiSOm)

182 Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 10:50 PM (DwhA2)

Just call them up and tell them you're sorry but you can't afford it.

They get it or they don't.

Posted by: Shannow at January 02, 2011 06:59 PM (hosB8)

183 The Rams/Seahawks game is hilarious, it's like that Three Stooges episode where they played football.

Posted by: booger at January 02, 2011 06:59 PM (9RFH1)

184 Disposing of a disgusting sockpuppet.

Posted by: steevy at January 02, 2011 06:59 PM (KDwap)

185 lacey, you are too kind, but I would never wear pants to a wedding. Well, unless it was one of those new-fangled lesbian deals and it was de rigeur. But, if it's going to involve overnight travel, I do hope you'll allow me to attend the prenuptial hobo hunt. Oh, hell, I'll just help you with the planning!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:00 PM (zxpIo)

186 blog broke for anyone else?

Posted by: laceyunderalls at January 02, 2011 07:01 PM (R76Xe)

187 Ok, decorations down and stowed away, house put back together, the holidays are officially over. Back to work, bitches!

Sad story about Ann-Margret and Elvis. Apparently they were madly in love, but at that stage of their careers, their managers made them stop seeing each other because they were worth more single and "available".

Evening all.

Posted by: mpurinTexas (kicking Mexico's ass since 1836) at January 02, 2011 07:01 PM (paOeu)

188 Did you still have PE? Was it required or optional?

I had required PE every year of my life, as far as I can recall. I can't remember if it was every day or not. I thought it was.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:01 PM (8uDC8)

189 191 kbdabear. when Lincoln said that he was talking to New Yorkers who were then same as now democrats. He tailored his speech to his audience. Posted by: delmar at January 02, 2011 10:57 PM

The more things CHANGE, the more they stay the same

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 07:02 PM (vdfwz)

190 Take that slave map and overlay it onto the map from the other night of most soda intake and you'll see more than a coincidental correlation.

Posted by: an erection lasting more than four hours at January 02, 2011 07:02 PM (ao9DD)

191 Screw em rabidsquirrel. Tell them as long as Obama is in office you will not be required to attend any weddings that require travel or large outlays of cash.

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 07:03 PM (3TjSM)

192 My parents got married on black friday. For reals. Don't think they were asses about it, though, and they kept it extremely small at any rate. It was my mom's second marriage and second weddings are rarely ever made a big deal of.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:03 PM (XiSOm)

193

We ran off our excess energy and actually paid attention in class. Somehow, this got lost and I'm not sure why.

Playing is considered unsafe. Children might get hurt playing (this does not, however, include playground bullying-bullies are misunderstood and are the victims). Instead, schools simply drug kids up with Ritalin. Problem solved.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 07:03 PM (+u2hn)

194

180Personally, I think it was slavery. I don't believe that people would accept 500,000 plus dead over an issue as dry as States rights.

Even with the Emancipation Proclamation four slave states were in the Union and stayed that way until the 13th Amendment was enacted.

Yeah, as I understood it, the Emancipation Procolmation was smart in that it advanced the Union Position and undercut slavery in the rebel states, but didn't antagonize states like Maryland. And since DC was in Maryland, if they succeeded, that would have been a huge problem.

172

It's my understanding that it was about slaves in the Kansas Territories. Lincoln offered to the south that they could keep their slaves but any new territories would be slave free.

Huh. I understood it to be that they started succeeding even before he took office. But I guess that even if they accepted his offer, that would mean that the slave states would gradually be outnumbered by the free states. Which is part of the reason why slave state expansion was such a hot issue, and so important for the current slave states.

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:03 PM (QLhy5)

195 195 The Rams/Seahawks game is hilarious, it's like that Three Stooges episode where they played football.
Posted by: booger at January 02, 2011 10:59 PM

It's for the NFC West CHAMPIONSHIP

You may resume with the laughing

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 07:04 PM (vdfwz)

196 PE was every other day at the middle school THH and I attended. But sometimes we'd get out of PE for health class or DARE. Oh, ghawd, DARE. Most useless thing ever, but I liked the getting-out-of-gym bit.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:04 PM (XiSOm)

197 Sad story about Ann-Margret and Elvis. Apparently they were madly in love, but at that stage of their careers, their managers made them stop seeing each other because they were worth more single and "available".

Talk about dodging a bullet, whew. And she married very well, in 1967, and the marriage is still going.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:04 PM (zxpIo)

198 Surprised they didn't flex the Packer/Bears game instead of this garbage

Posted by: Zakn at January 02, 2011 07:05 PM (zyaZ1)

199 100 Random question to Moron nation... Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding? Posted by: rabidsquirrel If you introduced them, consider that your gift. Or, plead some unavoidable issue, and send them a lovely gift card to Pottery Barn. I am pretty disgusted with the whang-do spendalicious weddings that girls think they are entitled to. Send a nice gift, and a lovely RSVP, I can't be there, and then don't worry about it. And when you get married (if you aren't already) remember this, and do something small and lovely-that's much more memorable. Plus, you will keep your friends if you don't ask them to pony up for more than a nice gift.

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 07:05 PM (dZmFh)

200 Interesting football tidbit from tonight:

The Rams have less than a quarter to avoid becoming the first NFL team in 70 years to have no pass plays of 50+ yards in an entire season.

Posted by: logprof at January 02, 2011 07:05 PM (BP6Z1)

201

CDR M at January 02, 2011 11:01 PM (5I8G0)

That's not me, its the lady from comment #151 who had to deal with that situation. I just commented on it.

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:05 PM (QLhy5)

202 Unfortunately, the military has long relied on a stream of generally healthy and physically fit recruits, and developed it's training programs accordingly. Furthermore, most NCOs that I've seen suck at PT. They run through the standards of push up, sit up, and then an ability group run, and that is it. Twenty years ago, or even ten years ago, that would have been enough for privates who were still fairly active. These days, however, soldiers spend all their time in their rooms after hours, and on staff duty they play video games non stop.

I know that they are revamping the APFT. I'd like to see one that goes: 40m sprints, ladder drills, push ups, bodyweight squats, pull ups, long jump, shot put, some ab exercise other than situp, 5 pound dumbbell exercises, and a five mile, 22 pound ruck march.

Separate basic training into two parts. The first would be eight weeks of pt, basic tumbling and gymnastics (important when you're trying to negotiate obstacles in body armor), hand to hand combat, drill and ceremony, and basic outdoor skills. The second part would be 8 weeks of squad and platoon tactics, military skills classes, marksmanship and heavy weapons qualifications and vehicle handling.

Commanders and senior NCOs need to become more aggressive about incorporating PT into the rest of training, and they need to stop viewing organized PT as "maintenance" and view it as developmental.

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:05 PM (JOQVN)

203 There was a story about one of the hybrid bears getting shot a few years ago. They called it a "pizzly."

Posted by: logprof at January 02, 2011 07:06 PM (BP6Z1)

204 Bradford's receivers have been letting him down, and now he's thrown a late pick.

Posted by: toby928™ at January 02, 2011 07:07 PM (S5YRY)

205 I'm guessing Fox said fuck off. There's a weird veto thing they have on dif games

Posted by: Zakn at January 02, 2011 07:07 PM (zyaZ1)

206

Do you think it's over the top to ask your friends to travel from Ohio to Florida, spend over $1000 to do so, and still ask for a gift for your wedding?

Give them yearlong membership in the "Jelly of the Month" club. It's a gift that keeps on giving the whole year.

Posted by: ed is chanelling his inner Cousin Eddie from Christmas Vacation.... at January 02, 2011 07:07 PM (QLhy5)

207 My parents got married on black friday. For reals. Don't think they were asses about it, though, and they kept it extremely small at any rate. It was my mom's second marriage and second weddings are rarely ever made a big deal of.

Well, both my parents made/are making a big deal of their second weddings...

Though my dad's sucked. And I had to wear lavender.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:07 PM (8uDC8)

208

TIHH, I'm reasonably sure that PE is optional down here. Lots of little pudgelets getting off the school bus on the corner...

And for the record, I sucked at PE too. No upper body strength, but soccer in fifth grade almost gave me legs like Tom Platz. I still think that the overreaction of mothers to child abduction stories reported breathlessly made them overprotective, keeping them inside for no real reason.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at January 02, 2011 07:07 PM (b6qrg)

209 Though my dad's sucked. And I had to wear lavender.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:07 PM (8uDC

Please please please tell me you're a female-type moron. Otherwise, the mental image is gonna haunt me for the rest of the night.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:09 PM (Rwudm)

210 If you introduced them, consider that your gift. Or, plead some unavoidable issue, and send them a lovely gift card to Pottery Barn.

I am pretty disgusted with the whang-do spendalicious weddings that girls think they are entitled to.

Send a nice gift, and a lovely RSVP, I can't be there, and then don't worry about it. And when you get married (if you aren't already) remember this, and do something small and lovely-that's much more memorable. Plus, you will keep your friends if you don't ask them to pony up for more than a nice gift.

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 11:05 PM (dZmFh)

I'm not married, and would never dream of asking people to go to such extremes to attend my wedding. I've tried to explain this to the bride-to-be, but she just gets offended and claims I was one of the first people on the invite list. It pisses me off, considering I was roommates with the groom-to-be for five years, and now that he lives across the street from me he hardly even finds time to talk to me.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:10 PM (DwhA2)

211 Shoulder rolls. We are talking about pulled pork shoulder on a white bread roll, right? Cause I can do about five of those. No problem. Seven if I skip the slaw and potato salad.

Posted by: Dang at January 02, 2011 07:11 PM (TXKVh)

212 rabid, just out of curiosity, where are these folks registered and what kind of schwag are they angling for as gifts?

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:12 PM (zxpIo)

213 Heh, I love reading our gus's posts on Gateway Pundit.

Posted by: logprof at January 02, 2011 07:12 PM (BP6Z1)

214 @207: I really wonder when slavery would have ended in the South if it wasn't for the Civil War. 1880? 1900? I would think eventually the South would have been shamed into freeing the slaves.

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 07:13 PM (tJjm/)

215 It pisses me off, considering I was roommates with the groom-to-be for five years, and now that he lives across the street from me he hardly even finds time to talk to me.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 11:10 PM (DwhA2)

Probably "first on the invite list" translates to "everyone above your name said oh hell no".

Personally, I think brides-to-be watch too much reality television - all that bridezillas and pimp my bride nonsense goes to their heads.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:13 PM (Rwudm)

216 I only did the wedding production because I was the first to get married and my Mom never had a wedding. So I did it for mom and dad, it made them so happy. Now that dad is gone I'm glad I did.

Posted by: mpfs at January 02, 2011 07:13 PM (3TjSM)

217 Skip To My Lou

Posted by: Count de Monet at January 02, 2011 07:13 PM (XBM1t)

218 224-mercy, you can't win for losing on this. Are they going to live across the street from you after the wedding? Can you get out of your lease if they do?!

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 07:14 PM (dZmFh)

219 221 My parents got married on black friday. For reals. Don't think they were asses about it, though, and they kept it extremely small at any rate. It was my mom's second marriage and second weddings are rarely ever made a big deal of.

Well, both my parents made/are making a big deal of their second weddings...

Though my dad's sucked. And I had to wear lavender. **************************** Lavender...isn't that a fancy name for purple? And isn't purple pretty much the official color of lesbians? Heck, maybe that 5 foot 1 inch 200 lb lady that your dad married really was a lesbian after all. Just like you suspected... Is this where you get your nic? ThisHeavenlyHell? I'll bet there's some good Moron style stories there.

Posted by: ed is chanelling his inner Cousin Eddie from Christmas Vacation.... at January 02, 2011 07:14 PM (QLhy5)

220 PE was every other day at the middle school THH and I attended. But sometimes we'd get out of PE for health class or DARE. Oh, ghawd, DARE. Most useless thing ever, but I liked the getting-out-of-gym bit.

I hated Health class almost as much as Gym. Were you there the time there was a picture of a giant penis on the overhead projector and the teacher was saying something like "And then blood rushes into the spongey tissue and causes it to become hard..." and that kid David whats-his-face (We used to call him David Queer-gay because we were amazingly creative) randomly shouts "Mine's doing that right now!"

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:14 PM (8uDC8)

221 I have the opposite problem, I'd really like a small and intimate wedding, but both my fiance and I have like eleventy billion relatives who will be severely butthurt if they're not invited, so we have to make it bigger than we'd like. Bleh. As a result we're keeping it to only family and very close friends (the poor poor victim maid of honor, who is reading this thread, will be one of the few non-relatives), and we'll have a smaller informal party after the honeymoon with our friends. But I get to wear the dress again. Because PRETTY DRESS.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:15 PM (XiSOm)

222 Please please please tell me you're a female-type moron. Otherwise, the mental image is gonna haunt me for the rest of the night.

Yes. Yes I am. But I've burned the pictures.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:15 PM (8uDC8)

223 226 rabid, just out of curiosity, where are these folks registered and what kind of schwag are they angling for as gifts?

Not sure yet. They just got engaged in November, and are getting married the first week in June. I don't even know for certain who's in the wedding, though I'm guessing that since the groom hasn't said anything to me that I'm not among the wedding party. The bride-to-be did mention that it would be nice if my buddies and I went in together to get the groom a kegerator or some home-brewing equipment, since he's expressed an interest in that.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:16 PM (DwhA2)

224 Sam Bradford doesn't look old enough to drive, no less QB an NFL team

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 07:16 PM (vdfwz)

225 Kaiya,

You need to go with MAGENTA brides maid dresses. Trust me on this...

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:16 PM (JOQVN)

226

Stupid sock off...

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:16 PM (QLhy5)

227 @229: you know how it goes: 50 Grand for the wedding, 30 Grand for the divorce lawyer 5 years and 2 kids later. Love, American Style!

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 07:17 PM (tJjm/)

228 Kaiya,

You need to go with MAGENTA brides maid dresses. Trust me on this...

With ruffles. Lots of 'em.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:17 PM (zxpIo)

229 Shoulder rolls. We are talking about pulled pork shoulder on a white bread roll, right? Cause I can do about five of those. No problem. Seven if I skip the slaw and potato salad.

Well you've got the skipping part down, too! You'd better head to your local recruitment office ASAP! Your country needs you.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:18 PM (XiSOm)

230 Damn! I bet that even after thirty-some years, the seat on that bike is still warm to the touch!

Posted by: effinayright at January 02, 2011 07:18 PM (lhk1t)

231 235- my husband and I got engaged in Kuwait, after the first war. We had a reception there with our friends, and a small wedding at home with family. I got to wear my dress several times, since the custom for brides there was to wear the dress at showers (true story-had my dress made at a little post-war dress shop, and the shop burned down. Two weeks before we had to leave. We found a shop that did dresses for the emir's daughters who completed my dress overnight (it was simple) and for free. It was good to be American then. Now, not so much.(

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 07:18 PM (dZmFh)

232 Lavender...isn't that a fancy name for purple? And isn't purple pretty much the official color of lesbians? Heck, maybe that 5 foot 1 inch 200 lb lady that your dad married really was a lesbian after all. Just like you suspected... Is this where you get your nic? ThisHeavenlyHell? I'll bet there's some good Moron style stories there.

It's a gross pastel purple made specifically for hideous bridesmaids dresses. Not sure how my nic relates.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:19 PM (8uDC8)

233 mercy, you can't win for losing on this. Are they going to live across the street from you after the wedding? Can you get out of your lease if they do?!

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 11:14 PM (dZmFh)

No, they've already talked about buying a new house in the spring (he owns a house he rents out; they live in her condo across the street from mine), provided it has a swimming pool, because that's what she wants. Personally, I hope they move soon. I'm getting sick of both of them.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:19 PM (DwhA2)

234

claims I was one of the first people on the invite list.

Tell her thank you very much for thinking of you, decline the invite to the outrageous wedding, give them a Target gift card and prepare to be relieved of the company of this little darling from now on.

If she was a friend, she wouldn't make demands.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 07:19 PM (+u2hn)

235 241 @229: you know how it goes: 50 Grand for the wedding, 30 Grand for the divorce lawyer 5 years and 2 kids later. Love, American Style!

What's the lesson here, kiddies? Forsake marriage and decadence!

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 07:19 PM (c0A3e)

236 You need to go with MAGENTA brides maid dresses. Trust me on this...

Why are you so keen on getting me into a hideous magenta dress, Alex? e_e

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:20 PM (8uDC8)

237 With ruffles. Lots of 'em.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 11:17 PM (zxpIo)

Oh, yeah. Bridesmaids love that kind of thing. They'll still be thanking you years from now.

We're your friends...would we steer you wrong???

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:20 PM (Rwudm)

238 242 Kaiya,

You need to go with MAGENTA brides maid dresses. Trust me on this...

With ruffles. Lots of 'em.

And a black lace overlay.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 07:20 PM (fa9yq)

239

CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 11:13 PM (tJjm/)

Yeah, but it probably would have hung around until the 1960's. Which would have made the Boomers responsible for something good, as opposed to just a bunch of damn hippy wasters.

South African aparteid hung around until what? The 1990s?

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (QLhy5)

240 As a result we're keeping it to only family and very close friends (the poor poor victim maid of honor, who is reading this thread, will be one of the few non-relatives), and we'll have a smaller informal party after the honeymoon with our friends. But I get to wear the dress again. Because PRETTY DRESS.

Speaking of which, I want to know what I'm going to be wearing! Or at least what color

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (8uDC8)

241
What's the lesson here, kiddies? Forsake marriage and decadence! Live-in Thai ladyboys are cheaper and more fun!

FIFY

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (JOQVN)

242 This kick will determine if the 11-5 Saints have to play AT the 7-9 Seahawks next week.

Posted by: logprof at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (BP6Z1)

243

You need to go with MAGENTA brides maid dresses. Trust me on this...

With ruffles. Lots of 'em.

And a humongous bow in the front.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (+u2hn)

244 Why are you so keen on getting me into a hideous magenta dress, Alex? e_e

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:20 PM (8uDC

By tradition, aren't all bridesmaids' dresses hideous?

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (DwhA2)

245 the wedding blog
and the sea chickens lock it up

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 07:21 PM (3OCZw)

246 250-don't forget body glitter. And matching, glittery eye makeup. Bridesmaids love that too.

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 07:22 PM (dZmFh)

247 Well at least you can set up a basic homebrew scenario for not a ton of money, unless you get into doing your own mash. I can't imagine a bride really wants homebrew stuff all over the house, lots of clutter and smelly stuff going on. I'm thinking the Kegerator is what they're really angling for.

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 07:22 PM (bqjJT)

248 God bless Texas!

Posted by: Sekhmet at January 02, 2011 07:22 PM (FSpKM)

249 Why are you so keen on getting me into a hideous magenta dress, Alex? e_e

Because you must suffer!

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:22 PM (JOQVN)

250 I'm getting sick of both of them.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 11:19 PM (DwhA2)

And, yet, if you accede to their wedding invitation extortion, you will look back wistfully on these as the good ol' days.

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:23 PM (zxpIo)

251 And a humongous bow in the front.

Uh huh,
Butt Bow!!

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 07:23 PM (fa9yq)

252

Posted by: CoolCzech at January 02, 2011 11:17 PM (tJjm/)

Old joke: Love is grand, divorce is five grand.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at January 02, 2011 07:23 PM (b6qrg)

253 255
What's the lesson here, kiddies? Forsake marriage and decadence! Live-in Thai ladyboys Blow-up dolls are cheaper and more fun!

FIFM

Posted by: Palin Steele at January 02, 2011 07:23 PM (c0A3e)

254 What's the lesson here, kiddies? Forsake marriage and decadence!

Or get married for 20 bucks at a justice of the peace and also get a pre-nup. Problem solved.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:23 PM (8uDC8)

255 Uh huh,
Butt Bow!!

Posted by: Â¤Â§EZBÂ§Â¤ at January 02, 2011 11:23 PM (fa9yq)

And big, big pouffy sleeves.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:24 PM (Rwudm)

256 I don't think most women keep up with their bridesmaids anyway. Unless they're family. So just skip the wedding and start not keeping in touch a little sooner.

Posted by: Dang at January 02, 2011 07:25 PM (TXKVh)

257 this game has to be one of the worst I've watched this season

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 07:25 PM (Ig1Wo)

258 What did I ever do to you guys? ;-;

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:25 PM (8uDC8)

259 By tradition, aren't all bridesmaids' dresses hideous?

It beats down their self confidence and makes them more willing for a sweaty hook up with a groomsman in the broom closet during the reception

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:25 PM (JOQVN)

260 Don't expect the league to change anything after this. They'll reason that it's such a rare, fluke occurrence that there's no need to. I am in the camp of allowing division winners to make the playoffs (which would still allow the likes of Seattle 2010 in), but to base who plays at home on the overall records. That would mean Kansas City 2010 would have had to play in Baltimore, but it's fairer. I also think winning a division should still mean something since it intensifies rivalries.

Posted by: logprof at January 02, 2011 07:25 PM (BP6Z1)

261 270- golf clap for that comment! Well played sir!

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 07:26 PM (dZmFh)

262

'cept she's parked that magnificent ass on what I'm pretty sure is a pre-unit TR-6

Posted by: Unclefacts, Confuse A Cat, Ltd. at January 02, 2011 10:16 PM (eCAn3)

A TR-6 is a car. My friend's dad has a restored one I used to drive around in Florida.

Posted by: Bill R. at January 02, 2011 07:26 PM (EhlQq)

263 269 Uh huh,
Butt Bow!!

Posted by: Â¤Â§EZBÂ§Â¤ at January 02, 2011 11:23 PM (fa9yq)

And big, big pouffy sleeves.

YEP!
I suck at the URL thing,
uglydress dot com is a riot.... nothing but hideous bridesmaids dresses.!

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 07:26 PM (fa9yq)

264 What did I ever do to you guys? ;-;

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:25 PM (8uDC

All we're trying to do is make this wedding something you'll remember forever and ever and ever...

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:27 PM (Rwudm)

265 260250-don't forget body glitter. And matching, glittery eye makeup. Bridesmaids love that too. Hmmmm... all you need now is a lot of perfumey body spray and these Bridesmaids are starting to look and smell like an exact replica of strippers. Is that the goal? Or just a side benefit? Either way, I approve...

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:27 PM (QLhy5)

266 Personally, I hope they move soon. I'm getting sick of both of them.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 11:19 PM (DwhA2)

I think you answered your own question with that. Eff 'em.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 07:27 PM (KqBTY)

267

If she was a friend, she wouldn't make demands.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 11:19 PM (+u2hn)

There are days when I consider revealing to the groom that I had her first, and she wasn't that good. Then I sober up and try not to be a bad person.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:27 PM (DwhA2)

268 Ladies and gentleman, HISTORY MAKING SEATTLE SEAHAWKS!!!

Have a nice plane ride to Seattle, Saints. *snicker*

Posted by: Editor at January 02, 2011 07:27 PM (YX6i/)

269 uglydress dot com is a riot.... nothing but hideous bridesmaids dresses.!

I just pulled up that page, and the dress on the front is a dead ringer for the one we're describing. It's perfect!

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:28 PM (JOQVN)

270 http://www.uglydress.com/

damn!!!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:29 PM (zxpIo)

271 And it's official - the NFC West 2010 is the worst division in NFL history.

Posted by: Editor at January 02, 2011 07:29 PM (YX6i/)

272

There are days when I consider revealing to the groom that I had her first, and she wasn't that good. Then I sober up and try not to be a bad person.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 11:27 PM (DwhA2)

Yep, they prolly need to move, and quickly.

And I'd definitely skip the wedding, for reasons of personal and public safety.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (Rwudm)

273 216 There was a story about one of the hybrid bears getting shot a few years ago. They called it a "pizzly." ------ Maybe it's like a liger/tigon where what you call it depends on which parent was what gender.

Posted by: Anachronda at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (6fER6)

274 There are fireworks going off in Ballard, right now. Heh.

Posted by: Editor at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (YX6i/)

275 And it's official - the NFC West 2010 is the worst division in NFL history.

Posted by: Editor at January 02, 2011 11:29 PM (YX6i/)

I kept waiting for someone to catch a ball on the Rams and it never happened

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (Ig1Wo)

276 LOL but this one is so very patriotic: http://www.uglydress.com/prompatriot.html

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (XiSOm)

277

Garbled comment # 279 should show that (1) I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing here, and (2) The Johnny Walker is really kicking in.

So all is well.

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (QLhy5)

278 Wow - check out Dave Barry's end of year effort.

Reading it I'd almost say he was a fellow moron;

http://tinyurl.com/2vajvc6

...the U.S. economy suffers another blow as the Federal Bureau of Never Expecting Unemployment To Be As High As It Actually Is reports that, for the 37th consecutive month, unemployment is unexpectedly high. Â“Darned if we didnÂ’t get fooled again!Â” exclaims a bureau spokesperson, adding, Â“We expect it to be lower next month.Â” Meanwhile Federal Reserve Chairman Bernanke, speaking from his new office in Toronto, announces a plan to drastically increase the U.S. money supply by Â“quantitative easing,Â” a controversial process involving what Bernanke describes as Â“a major job for KinkoÂ’s.Â”

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (bgcml)

279 Fusion reactors are a gateway reactor to matter/anti-matter reactors. We must stop them (for the children).

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 07:30 PM (+iY8m)

280 OMG! That pregnant prom dress. Jeez Louise.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 07:31 PM (KqBTY)

281 I just pulled up that page, and the dress on the front is a dead ringer for the one we're describing. It's perfect!

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 11:28 PM (JOQVN)

Wow - a prototype!

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:31 PM (Rwudm)

282 Damn gas was 3.21 in Virginia today; did I miss something in the Persian Gulf?

Posted by: Jean at January 02, 2011 07:31 PM (CPefM)

283

I kept waiting for someone to catch a ball on the Rams and it never happened

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 11:30 PM (Ig1Wo)

I think that as part of the press conference after the game they should announce they are firing all the receivers. I'm sure they can find a guy with better hands selling hotdogs at Qwest.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:31 PM (bgcml)

284 Kaiya wants me to wear something like this: http://tinyurl.com/2bftjjq

Because we're dorky, and medieval stuff is cool.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:32 PM (8uDC8)

285 Now it's official:

Rams are the first NFL team in 7 decades to go an entire season without a 50+ yard reception. Wow.

Chalk it up to a rookie QB (albeit one who played in a trigger-happy offense in college) and lots of injuries at receiver.

Posted by: logprof at January 02, 2011 07:32 PM (BP6Z1)

286 "Fusion reactors are a gateway reactor to matter/anti-matter reactors.

We must stop them (for the children)."

Ok but after I get a small one for my bicycle

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 07:32 PM (3OCZw)

287 283 uglydress dot com is a riot.... nothing but hideous bridesmaids dresses.!

I just pulled up that page, and the dress on the front is a dead ringer for the one we're describing. It's perfect!

The "Married in a Whorehouse" dress is one of my favs.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 07:32 PM (fa9yq)

288 When a Democrats plays the game, well he's just taking a much needed break from the rigors of the office.

Dude, I put in at least 40 hours. A month.

Posted by: Barack Obama at January 02, 2011 07:33 PM (bgcml)

289 And of course the mutant bears are all your fault.

But do they taste good with some fried potatoes and a beer?

Posted by: A Hungry moron at January 02, 2011 07:33 PM (bgcml)

290 Shhhh! A democrat is president. High gas prices are a secret.

Posted by: dagny at January 02, 2011 07:33 PM (d87x3)

291 Because we're dorky, and medieval stuff is cool.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:32 PM (8uDC

Well, it's not bad. But it's not magenta.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:33 PM (Rwudm)

292

I think that as part of the press conference after the game they should announce they are firing all the receivers. I'm sure they can find a guy with better hands selling hotdogs at Qwest.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 11:31 PM (bgcml)

I just kept wondering what the receivers wanted, Bradford put those right into their hands and no one could catch them

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 07:34 PM (Ig1Wo)

293 Fox Destroyed Their Competitors in 2010

Well, Obama almost destroyed the country, so I wouldn't call it even...

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:34 PM (bgcml)

294 Check out this blushing bride!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:34 PM (zxpIo)

295 252 242 Kaiya,

You need to go with MAGENTA brides maid dresses. Trust me on this...

With ruffles. Lots of 'em.

And a black lace overlay.

And a hoop skirt!

Posted by: sock puppeh at January 02, 2011 07:35 PM (VcPAo)

296 I denounce myself for bringing up the subject of weddings, and derailing this thread, especially wrt bridesmaid dresses. My apologies to the male Morons.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:35 PM (DwhA2)

297 There better be a lot of booze at this wedding.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:35 PM (8uDC8)

298 Less than a third of today's youth could actually qualify for military service:

Well, we repealed DADT, so we might be losing out on a third of that third...but the thousands hundreds dozens of recruits from San Fran and Boston will make up for....right?

Posted by: The Military Brass at January 02, 2011 07:36 PM (bgcml)

299 I'm surprised the the Morons haven't already found the tattoos and skanks page on the ugly dress site. Theys boobies there.

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 07:36 PM (bqjJT)

300 Check out this blushing bride!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 11:34 PM (zxpIo)

ROTFLMAO! Stop! I can't take it.

Posted by: Steph at January 02, 2011 07:36 PM (KqBTY)

301 There better be a lot of booze at this wedding.

Oh, there will be.

Sorry for the thread derail. We should go back to talking about fat kids trying to get in the military again.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:36 PM (XiSOm)

302 It beats down their self confidence and makes them more willing for a sweaty hook up with a groomsman in the broom closet during the reception

That's not happening either! I don't care how drunk I get!

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:36 PM (8uDC8)

303 Top 10 sockpuppeteers:
1 [143 names] '18-1' [20.43 unique names/day]

I rocked that list like No Name QB #3 rocked the Rams tonight.

Posted by: 18-1 Not Boasting At All at January 02, 2011 07:37 PM (bgcml)

304 On uglydress dot com my favorite part is the weird headgear.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 07:37 PM (+u2hn)

305

Yep, they prolly need to move, and quickly.

And I'd definitely skip the wedding, for reasons of personal and public safety.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 11:30 PM (Rwudm)

Sadly, I get along well with each of them on an individual basis. When they're together, they both act differently. I would never actually tell my buddy that I slept with his bride-to-be. And for the record, it was before I introduced them. I may be a moron, but I'm not an asshole.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:38 PM (DwhA2)

306 Damn gas was 3.21 in Virginia today; did I miss something in the Persian Gulf?

Posted by: Jean at January 02, 2011 11:31 PM (CPefM)

Hey, you people forgetting you've got me already?

Posted by: Barack "Ride a Bike" Obama at January 02, 2011 07:38 PM (bgcml)

307 I reached high school having never jumped rope, which was one of the exercises our PE class was graded on. I was trip-o-phonic with a rope in my hands.

All of us spazzes did many skipping laps around the gym until we learned to coordinate our rhythmic hops. After that, the rope part was easy. Which led to confident footwork in basketball, dance and faux-boxing.

Strength, stamina, coordination. You need all three.

Posted by: Little Miss Spellcheck at January 02, 2011 07:38 PM (a5ljo)

308 Kaiya wants me to wear something like this: http://tinyurl.com/2bftjjq

Because we're dorky, and medieval stuff is cool.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:32 PM (8uDC

I've got just the pillaging axe to go with that outfit.

Posted by: Some Viking at January 02, 2011 07:39 PM (bgcml)

309 I denounce myself for bringing up the subject of weddings, and derailing this thread, especially wrt bridesmaid dresses. My apologies to the male Morons.

Why are you apologizing to them? They're having fun teasing me. e_e

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:39 PM (8uDC8)

310 At ugly dresses dot com I just saw a Hello Kitty wedding dress. I happen to know a hot Asian-American babe that would snatch that sucker up in a heartbeat. Must Send Link

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 07:39 PM (+iY8m)

311 "I denounce myself for bringing up the subject of weddings, and derailing this thread, especially wrt bridesmaid dresses. My apologies to the male Morons."

And your penance shall be to watch msnbc for one entire week whilst consuming schnapps in a flavor of your choice

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 07:40 PM (3OCZw)

312

I just kept wondering what the receivers wanted, Bradford put those right into their hands and no one could catch them

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 11:34 PM (Ig1Wo)

What? Did you see handles on the ball? Because I didn't sure didn't as I was reaching for them.

Posted by: Some Rams Receiver at January 02, 2011 07:40 PM (bgcml)

313 When I enlisted right out of highschool along with the other forty guys in my flight only one guy washed out.He cracked mentally.But everyone else had no problems with the physical aspect.Those were the days before computers and we actually had phys-ed in school.What a nation of wimps we have these days.Can't do simple pushups.I'll bet half the guys in highschool now have the upper body strength of a female.No offense to our moronetts.

Posted by: ziptie at January 02, 2011 07:41 PM (0135J)

314 Do you guys think it was the issue of slavery that the North and South were fighting over? Or was it the issue of States rights?

Slavery, no doubt. There were other issues, but slavery was the one that couldn't be finessed. Slave owners saw it as an issue of economic survival. For opponents of slavery it was a very basic moral issue, good vs evil.

Posted by: Iowa Bob at January 02, 2011 07:41 PM (ZggM/)

315 That's not happening either! I don't care how drunk I get!

This case of Kaluha says otherwise...

Posted by: The Best Man at January 02, 2011 07:41 PM (JOQVN)

316

I just kept wondering what the receivers wanted, Bradford put those right into their hands and no one could catch them

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 11:34 PM (Ig1Wo)

Speaking of which, what the heck was the name of the guy that was dropping all the passes? I could swear I heard them call him Dinara.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:41 PM (bgcml)

317 I would never actually tell my buddy that I slept with his bride-to-be. And for the record, it was before I introduced them. I may be a moron, but I'm not an asshole.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 11:38 PM (DwhA2)

Well, no, of course you wouldn't. And you're obviously not an asshole, otherwise they wouldn't be getting married, certainly not with you on the guest list.

Just seems like it would make things a bit - uncomfortable. I dunno, maybe guys think differently about stuff like that.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:41 PM (Rwudm)

318 And your penance shall be to watch msnbc for one entire week whilst consuming schnapps in a flavor of your choice

Posted by: melvin at January 02, 2011 11:40 PM (3OCZw)

Damn. It's not like I killed somebody...

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:42 PM (DwhA2)

319 298 Kaiya wants me to wear something like this: http://tinyurl.com/2bftjjq

Because we're dorky, and medieval stuff is cool.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:32 PM (8uDC

I like it too.

Posted by: The inexplicable Dr. Julius Strangepork at January 02, 2011 07:42 PM (tDM6j)

320 296 Damn gas was 3.21 in Virginia today; did I miss something in the Persian Gulf? ------ I paid 3.32 this afternoon. CA in the desert.

Posted by: Anachronda at January 02, 2011 07:42 PM (6fER6)

321

ThisHeavenlyHell...yeah, that would be a good dress.

But this would do the nerd thing even better..

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 07:42 PM (QLhy5)

322

Speaking of which, what the heck was the name of the guy that was dropping all the passes? I could swear I heard them call him Dinara.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 11:41 PM (bgcml)

Dinario Alexander

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 07:43 PM (Ig1Wo)

323 This case of Kaluha says otherwise...

My love of Kahlua is not enough to get me to hook-up with random strangers.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:43 PM (8uDC8)

324

Just seems like it would make things a bit - uncomfortable. I dunno, maybe guys think differently about stuff like that.

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 11:41 PM (Rwudm)

It wasn't a big deal. We were both single and spent a lot of time hanging out. We were both cool with it.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:43 PM (DwhA2)

325 I'm surprised the the Morons haven't already found the tattoos and skanks page on the ugly dress site. Theys boobies there.

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 11:36 PM (bqjJT)

You realize we have access to the whole internet right? Google Image Search for *anything* with safe search off and you'd get boobies...

Uh, not that I'd know.

Posted by: Some GISing Moron at January 02, 2011 07:44 PM (bgcml)

326 At ugly dresses dot com I just saw a Hello Kitty wedding dress. I happen to know a hot Asian-American babe that would snatch that sucker up in a heartbeat.

At least you know what to get her for the wedding gift...

Posted by: The Hello Kitty Back Masssager at January 02, 2011 07:45 PM (bgcml)

327

ThisHeavenlyHell...yeah, that would be a good dress.

But this would do the nerd thing even better..

I own a cape. I had to stop wearing it because I got tired of creepy wiccans and goth kids thinking I was one of them.

And no, I wouldn't wear that.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:45 PM (8uDC8)

328 I want pictures of a TRON themed wedding. I know that they must exist...

Posted by: Alex at January 02, 2011 07:45 PM (JOQVN)

329 Night all-kids are back to school tomorrow, back to work, and no more staying up late. Have a great Monday, and Happy New Year to those I missed yesterday!

Posted by: moki at January 02, 2011 07:45 PM (dZmFh)

330 Because we're dorky, and medieval stuff is cool.

I already have one like that. Does that make me dorkier?

And while I'm at it, I might as well admit that I occasionally skip arm-in-arm with my teenage daughter.

And I'm currently sober.

I denounce myself.

Posted by: sock puppeh at January 02, 2011 07:46 PM (VcPAo)

331

It wasn't a big deal. We were both single and spent a lot of time hanging out. We were both cool with it.

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 11:43 PM (DwhA2)

Gawd, suddenly I feel so old...

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:46 PM (Rwudm)

332 My love of Kahlua is not enough to get me to hook-up with random strangers.

But the best man is in the air force, and will be wearing a kilt (maybe. his idea not mine. but goes with the theme.)!

Eh, I'm pretty sure he has a girlfriend anyway

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:46 PM (XiSOm)

333 Thanks for the feedback and opportunity to vent, Morons. Have a good Valu-Rite addled and hobo blood-stained New Year.

And for God's sake, avoid destination weddings!

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at January 02, 2011 07:47 PM (DwhA2)

334

But this would do the nerd thing even better..

Posted by: ed at January 02, 2011 11:42 PM (QLhy5)

Just don't wear it around a campfire.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:48 PM (bgcml)

335 Slavery, no doubt. There were other issues, but slavery was the one that couldn't be finessed. Slave owners saw it as an issue of economic survival. For opponents of slavery it was a very basic moral issue, good vs evil.

Posted by: Iowa Bob at January 02, 2011 11:41 PM (ZggM/)

Except that the VAST majority of men who fought for the South, my ancestors included, did NOT own slaves.

And if it had been about slavery, then why did Lincoln and the North not free the slaves at the BEGINING of the war?

As they say, the winners write history, and the winners of this one did not want the real reasons talked about... thus the "slavery" is all important meme.

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 07:48 PM (AdK6a)

336 Wow, it's LATE...nite, all...

Posted by: antisocialist at January 02, 2011 07:48 PM (Rwudm)

337 "I own a cape"

yea I one a couple of capes too but it's cool

Posted by: Batman at January 02, 2011 07:48 PM (3OCZw)

338 Damn gas was 3.21 in Virginia today; did I miss something in the Persian Gulf?
Posted by: Jean at January 02, 2011 11:31 PM

If the EPA succeeds in wiping it's ass with the Constitution, you'll see gas prices blowing through 4 bucks once they shut down Texas refineries over that carbon bullshit.

And the MFM will blame Republicans in Congress and the greedy oil companies. King Barry will propose a huge windfall profits tax once again

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 07:48 PM (vdfwz)

339

Dinario Alexander

Posted by: The Dude at January 02, 2011 11:43 PM (Ig1Wo)

Well, I guess I can understand now with all the beatings to the head the poor boy must have taken as a child.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:48 PM (bgcml)

340 Because we're dorky, and medieval stuff is cool.

In that case, you should find plenty of inspiration here. You're welcome!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 07:49 PM (zxpIo)

341

You realize we have access to the whole internet right? Google Image Search for *anything* with safe search off and you'd get boobies...

Uh, not that I'd know.

Yeah, guess that I haven't spent enough time GISing, or my use of keywords is weak, somehow I just don't seem to come across those images

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 07:49 PM (bqjJT)

342 A TR6 was also a 650 cc single-carb, but that's a 500 right there.

Who remembers the 68's, with the darling book-rack on the tank that was cited in court for "degloving" the rider's penis while he was headed over the bars?
And the strike years, when mechanics used to find a spare fork gasket torn in half and stuffed down the slider to jam the suspension travel?

Please put me the fuckin info of where the Army and Air Force hold "boot camp," jesuschristalmighty. Anybody look up the physical failure rate for WWII? Why, it was a national scandal. Did you read what the Army plans to do? Yoga and more vegetables. I shit you not.

And that "big"-cocks study was done in Bulgaria, not Texas; the difference was less than a quarter-inch, country to city, as if Texas has no cities, and the lengths were just over three and one-half inches. Now who was reminded of Texas by that?

Posted by: TV's Andy Levee halftime report at January 02, 2011 07:49 PM (hrwMe)

343 But the best man is in the air force, and will be wearing a kilt (maybe. his idea not mine. but goes with the theme.)!

Oh my... Doe he have an accent?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:51 PM (8uDC8)

344 Slavery, no doubt. There were other issues, but slavery was the one that couldn't be finessed. Slave owners saw it as an issue of economic survival. For opponents of slavery it was a very basic moral issue, good vs evil.

Not everyone who fights in a war is fighting for the same reason. Take Vietnam, for example. We were fighting to keep the world safe from commies. The Vietnamese (well, on the other side, anyway) were fighting to end a foreign occupation.

My guess is most of the Southerners fighting were doing so, like Lee, because they were defending their homes.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 07:51 PM (QgI7g)

345 Why are you so keen on getting me into a hideous magenta dress, Alex? e_e
Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 11:20 PM

It's not the dress, it's the magenta shoes

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 07:52 PM (vdfwz)

346 Except that the VAST majority of men who fought for the South, my ancestors included, did NOT own slaves. And if it had been about slavery, then why did Lincoln and the North not free the slaves at the BEGINING of the war? As they say, the winners write history, and the winners of this one did not want the real reasons talked about... thus the "slavery" is all important meme. Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 11:48 PM (AdK6a) Why did some States want to leave the US and form a Confederacy?

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 07:52 PM (+iY8m)

347 And the MFM will blame Republicans in Congress and the greedy oil companies. King Barry will propose a huge windfall profits tax once again

Posted by: kbdabear at January 02, 2011 11:48 PM (vdfwz)

Well, that might be one way to keep the tea party spirit going.

One of the critical issues we face is that the people that decide elections don't want to pay attention to politics.

Its why Democrats can talk conservative around election time and vote like Pelosi for the next 2 years, and why the State Media propaganda works.

Given a clear choice between left and right with an electorate paying attention, and the conservatives always win.

Yeah the media was able to blame it on Bush last time around, but people are pretty sold on the notion the president takes the blame for everything now - so it won't be as easy a sell.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:53 PM (bgcml)

348 Oh my... Doe he have an accent?

LOL well he does live in England ... when he came to visit last summer he was starting to get a trace of an English accent but he didn't quite have one, but he'll have had a whole year to practice.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 07:53 PM (XiSOm)

349 In that case, you should find plenty of inspiration here. You're welcome!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 11:49 PM (zxpIo)

An acquittance of mine had her second marriage to a man in a kilt. The daughter asked her why they were both wearing dresses.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:54 PM (bgcml)

350 At ugly dresses dot com I just saw a Hello Kitty wedding dress.

*faints from excitement*

Posted by: the future Mrs. Chemjeff at January 02, 2011 07:54 PM (xtR+a)

351
Yeah, guess that I haven't spent enough time GISing, or my use of keywords is weak, somehow I just don't seem to come across those images

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 11:49 PM (bqjJT)

Hmm, well if you can't find boobies out of GIS I suggest turning in your mancard...hey wait a minute.

Posted by: Some Moron at January 02, 2011 07:55 PM (bgcml)

352 LOL well he does live in England ... when he came to visit last summer he was starting to get a trace of an English accent but he didn't quite have one, but he'll have had a whole year to practice.

Bugger.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 07:55 PM (8uDC8)

353 The Vietnamese (well, on the other side, anyway) were fighting to end a foreign occupation.

There were Americans in North Vietnam?

Speaking of which, why weren't there Americans in North Vietnam?

Amazing what results you get when you don't fight a war to win it...

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 07:56 PM (bgcml)

354 Can we switch TCU into the NFC West?

Posted by: Jean at January 02, 2011 07:56 PM (CPefM)

355

Hmm, well if you can't find boobies out of GIS I suggest turning in your mancard...hey wait a minute.

Posted by: Some Moron

Ya got me - I'm probably not spending too much time looking for boobie pics

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 07:57 PM (bqjJT)

356 Is there a flaming golf club available? Seems like a good time to review this gem from Jonathan Chait...

http://articles.latimes.com/2005/jul/22/opinion/oe-chait22

Posted by: Johnny Chait at January 02, 2011 07:58 PM (htQPz)

357 Oh crap. I made the top 10. It's the beginning of the end for sure!

Posted by: NC Ref at January 02, 2011 07:58 PM (VqMeI)

358 No capes!

Posted by: Edna Mode at January 02, 2011 07:58 PM (xtR+a)

359 Ya got me - I'm probably not spending too much time looking for boobie pics

Posted by: some wench at January 02, 2011 11:57 PM (bqjJT)

Hey, I've got this great movie you should see - its all about blue boobies...uh the importance of stopping resource wasting Americans...uh the importance of being human...uh ok boobies.

Posted by: James Cameron at January 02, 2011 07:58 PM (bgcml)

360 Hey, I've got this great movie you should see - its all about blue boobies...uh the importance of stopping resource wasting Americans...uh the importance of being human...uh ok boobies.

I've never seen that movie but I have seen Pocahontas and also Fern Gully and also the Smurfs so I can converse about it intelligently.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 08:01 PM (XiSOm)

361 *faints from excitement*

Posted by: the future Mrs. Chemjeff at January 02, 2011 11:54 PM (xtR+a)

hey now - I don't actually like Hello Kitty, you know, I just find the idea of Hello Kitty sex toys and Hello Kitty weaponry to be downright bizarre

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 08:01 PM (PaSAU)

362 Brett Favre is setting a record for the number of um's and uh's at a press conference.

Posted by: booger at January 02, 2011 08:01 PM (9RFH1)

363 Oh crap. I made the top 10. It's the beginning of the end for sure!

Posted by: NC Ref at January 02, 2011 11:58 PM (VqMeI)

Wow, you made both of them. Congratulations!

Posted by: Peaches at January 02, 2011 08:02 PM (zxpIo)

364 Why did some States want to leave the US and form a Confederacy?

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 11:52 PM (+iY8m)

Because the North was in the process of breaking the "contract" which was the Constitution. The Federal Government was overstepping its authority and dictating to the States.

And as the North had a higher population, it was going to control the Federal Government... thus if the Southern States wished to have the autonomy the Founders gave them... they had to leave.

Much like now... if the only arbiter of Federal Power, is the Federal Government itself... then in the end the only recourse if the Second Amendment.

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 08:03 PM (AdK6a)

365

#10 Kratos

Well duh, since boobs are mentioned about 3,492,129 times per thread, and he has an allergic reaction to such godliness, it all makes sense.

evening all btw.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:03 PM (lV4Fs)

366 @378

Thanks...I think?

Posted by: NC Ref at January 02, 2011 08:03 PM (VqMeI)

367 Riddle me this, y'all: If the Giants won, why is it they aren't going to the playoffs?

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 02, 2011 08:04 PM (ry5si)

368 hey now - I don't actually like Hello Kitty, you know, I just find the idea of Hello Kitty sex toys and Hello Kitty weaponry to be downright bizarre

I have Hello Kitty socks. They amuse me.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 08:04 PM (8uDC8)

369 Brett Favre is setting a record for the number of um's and uh's at a press conference.

Let me be clear, uh, um, that record, is uh, mine!

Posted by: The Pres-uh-dent at January 02, 2011 08:04 PM (xtR+a)

370 The Federal Government was overstepping its authority and dictating to the States. Posted by: Romeo13 at January 03, 2011 12:03 AM (AdK6a) Dictating what to the States?

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 08:05 PM (+iY8m)

371 You know what's fun? Vinegar in your windpipe.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 08:05 PM (8uDC8)

372 374 Hey, I've got this great movie you should see - its all about blue boobies... ----- Blue boobies is the porn industry spoof of blue man group, right?

Posted by: Anachronda at January 02, 2011 08:05 PM (6fER6)

373 There were Americans in North Vietnam?

Well, no, but the North Vietnamese and Viet Cong didn't want to give up because they didn't recognize Vietnam as two countries.

I wonder if the South Koreans would have gone along with the armistice (which they never signed) if they realized their country would still be partitioned in 2010.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 08:05 PM (QgI7g)

374 I have hello kitty socks too! Pink ones. I was a bit disturbed to find out my gay friend has the exact same ones.

I want the hello kitty toaster

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 08:06 PM (XiSOm)

375 Let me be clear, uh, um, that record, is uh, mine!

Posted by: The Pres-uh-dent at January 03, 2011 12:04 AM (xtR+a)

Hey asshole. Want to stop taking all the credit?

Posted by: The Tel-uh-prompter at January 02, 2011 08:06 PM (lV4Fs)

376 Anyone inviting you to a wedding at the other end of the country (or world) is playing upmanship, and no longer desires your friendship. The only exception would be if you are known to regularly travel to that area anyway.

Now, if they offer to pay your way, the way it's supposed to go, you have generous friends and should reciprocate appropriately.

Marriage is one thing; weddings, another altogether. Too many people do both just because they've run out of other options, but a good marriage can eventually make you a better person and improve your way of life -- and no one has ever said that about a wedding.

Posted by: comatus at January 02, 2011 08:06 PM (hrwMe)

377

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 11:48 PM (AdK6a)

Have you ever actually read any of the Articles of Secession? If it wasn't about slavery, why do they bring it up so damned often?

Posted by: Slow Joe for Preznit 2011! at January 02, 2011 11:54 PM (Sl8d5)

Difference between Trigger, and cause. Slavery was the issue that prooved to the South that they were loosing their autonomy.

Because if the Feds could over ride them on Slavery, which WAS talked about in the Consitutional Convention... then they would have no say on anything.

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 08:07 PM (AdK6a)

378 Would a Hello Kitty chain saw cost a guy his mancard?

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 08:07 PM (+iY8m)

379 Brett Favre is setting a record for the number of um's and uh's at a press conference.

yeah, but he's doing it without a teleprompter

no, wait.....

Posted by: B.H.Obama at January 02, 2011 08:08 PM (jzOkH)

380 Riddle me this, y'all: If the Giants won, why is it they aren't going to the playoffs?

Because Green Bay is ..

Posted by: Jean at January 02, 2011 08:08 PM (CPefM)

381 eman here ya go:
Hello Kitty Chainsaw

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 08:09 PM (PaSAU)

382 Dictating what to the States?

Posted by: eman at January 03, 2011 12:05 AM (+iY8m)

That owning people instead of doing the work yourself is as backwards as having a scrotum for a nose.

Midn you, they made this demand just years after ceasing this themselves. Besides, if all the slaves stayed in the south, where oh where were New Englanders going to find a massive source of dirt-cheap labor for their textile industry?

The North wanted dirt cheap labor and could use the federal government to provide just that, by taking the free labor from the south. One group of rich bastards trying to hide behind a moral imperative to rob from another group of rich bastards hiding behind states rights.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:11 PM (lV4Fs)

383

I want the hello kitty toaster

I have a friend who owns a Hello Kitty coffee maker.

Posted by: katya, the designated driver at January 02, 2011 08:11 PM (+u2hn)

384 Ann Margaret - yowsa! I'm a chick (who's not into chicks) and I would hit that.

Posted by: pforeman at January 02, 2011 08:11 PM (S7Xpi)

385 I have Hello Kitty socks. They amuse me.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 03, 2011 12:04 AM (8uDC

I get a little tired of hearing that you know. I can be manly too.

Posted by: Hello Kitty Boot Socks at January 02, 2011 08:13 PM (bgcml)

386

Mind you, re the CW i don't have a cat in this chinese stew- the war ended 145 years ago and the only people arguing over it like mad today are the guilt pimps rambling over past wrongs and the southerners who cannot let go of the fact that their ancestors got utterly butt-stretched by the Yankees.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:15 PM (lV4Fs)

387 The issues of slavery and loss of autonomy go hand in hand. You can't separate them. The reason slavery stands out in the mix is slavery was evil. The North wasn't trying to rid States or any new States of a tradition of clunky music or bad pudding recipes. Slavery was too evil to leave in place. Confederate squealing about State's Rights was just bullshit.

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 08:15 PM (+iY8m)

388 396 eman here ya go:
Hello Kitty Chainsaw

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 12:09 AM (PaSAU)

That website is aptly named...

Posted by: sock puppeh at January 02, 2011 08:15 PM (VcPAo)

389

A TR6 was also a 650 cc single-carb, but that's a 500 right there.

I did not know that. Who would have thought that a company that uses Lucas for their electrical needs would name both a car and a motorcyle the same thing!

Posted by: Bill R. at January 02, 2011 08:16 PM (EhlQq)

390 And if it had been about slavery, then why did Lincoln and the North not free the slaves at the BEGINING of the war?

Lincoln was a politician and we mythologize Presidents after a certain period has passed, but he was still a politician and acted like one. He needed to keep the border states that held slaves and there were significant parts of the North that didn't care or want to go to war over slavery, so he canned the slavery talk until he had a major victory.

Posted by: AD at January 02, 2011 08:17 PM (9r1ux)

391 This is awful:

http://tinyurl.com/2alhlhn

Posted by: Person Wanting to Leave CA forever at January 02, 2011 08:20 PM (QdxaI)

392 eman here ya go: Hello Kitty Chainsaw Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 12:09 AM (PaSAU) Trumped by reality again. Holy cow.

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 08:21 PM (+iY8m)

393 Confederate squealing about State's Rights was just bullshit.

I disagree. That tension underlies everything that's happened in this country from the beginning. The civil war may have meant the end of slavery, but the price was high - it was the end of the republic as well.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 08:21 PM (QgI7g)

394

#405

Doubtless there was, and slavery had to be kept legal at the time of the nations founding to ensure the South didn't balk and walk off. But if you really believe the war was either a fight for states rights or a fight against slavery, re-read the economic history of the era. Excuses can always sound noble.

btw, Alex Jones, really? I find that insulting to an extreme.

I have much better hair. Well, what is left of it.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:21 PM (lV4Fs)

395
Well, no, but the North Vietnamese and Viet Cong didn't want to give up because they didn't recognize Vietnam as two countries.

Perhaps, this was the official line - but do we have information on debriefed NVA prisoners? I have a strong suspicion that "I didn't want to be shot by the Communists for refusing to be drafted" was a much higher reason.

As for the Viet Cong weren't a significant force after the Tet Offensive. The war was won by the NVA.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:21 PM (bgcml)

396 As for the Viet Cong weren't a significant force after the Tet Offensive. The war was won by the NVA.

Agreed. But the sentiment that created the VC didn't come from nowhere. If it wasn't clear we intended to abandon our allies the VC would have been back in some form.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 08:24 PM (QgI7g)

397

The Civil War has been argued here over and over. Can we debate something a bit more pressing and relevant?

Like San Fransisco trying to regulate bacon?

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:24 PM (lV4Fs)

398 Of course it was about about slavery, at least it's expansion, into the new territories, that's what the Lincoln/Douglas debates were about, he was kind of a moderate abolitionist as opposed to Seward. If you think one could live with slavery consider
what three quarters of a century of segregation did afterwards. That was the next worse thing after slavery.

Posted by: justin cord at January 02, 2011 08:25 PM (c0+w5)

399 skipping? In the military? This is like a bad episode of monty pythons.

Posted by: Berserker at January 02, 2011 08:25 PM (gWHrG)

400 What is this I hear about bacon regulation?? Is this like when they tried to ban happy meals?

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 08:26 PM (XiSOm)

401
Agreed. But the sentiment that created the VC didn't come from nowhere. If it wasn't clear we intended to abandon our allies the VC would have been back in some form.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 03, 2011 12:24 AM (QgI7g)

Well, it depends. Kennedy's policy of allowing musical strongmen would have made any regime likely to produce instability.

Had he let Diem live, maybe not.

Interesting that the State Media lionize Kennedy. He was an unmitigated failure internationally, and while he was successful on economics it was via the hated "trickle down economics."

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:27 PM (bgcml)

402 CAC 397, That's ridiculous. The North had already found its source of cheap manpower with the massive failure of family farms beginning in 1816. And there was the continent of Europe, nicht war? Even Jefferson had commented that the northern states' commercial advantage was that they did not have to pay the upkeep of their laborers.

Virginia was nearly bankrupt, its profitable slave industries having slid from profitability way back in the 1820's. Unemployed slaves in those days were much more expensive than unemployed freemen. You're trying to use a Marxist argument against slavery. Here, of all places.

Discuss among yourself the impact of the Whitney cotton engine on the future of slavery, right at the time the constitutional variance expired. In the textile trade, the need for cheap semi-skilled labor was not in the north.

Posted by: comatus at January 02, 2011 08:28 PM (hrwMe)

403

Rumors for now, but so was the discussion on happy meals. Heard about it from my cousin living up in the bay. Something about the presence of nitrates.

Just for kicks I tried "nitrate free" bacon today. Fucking awful.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:28 PM (lV4Fs)

404 I disagree. That tension underlies everything that's happened in this country from the beginning. The civil war may have meant the end of slavery, but the price was high - it was the end of the republic as well. Posted by: Ace's liver at January 03, 2011 12:21 AM (QgI7g) Yes, the USA is out of balance and the Civil War engendered that state. Like I said, slavery and autonomy were fused together. Confederates and others should not say it was one or the other.

Posted by: eman at January 02, 2011 08:28 PM (+iY8m)

405 Ok, so here is a question. Why is the AoSHQ icon for the browser tab a cherry?

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:28 PM (bgcml)

406 Like San Fransisco trying to regulate bacon?

.... :O Kill it with fire.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 08:28 PM (8uDC8)

407 #416 Like San Fransisco trying to regulate bacon?

The deuce you say?

Doesn't surprise me though. San Fran-ians only want certain types of meat unregulated, alas, not those from the noble, dedicated pig.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 02, 2011 08:28 PM (c0A3e)

408 http://tinyurl.com/36qjcnm
A true story about Ann Mararet and her gentlemen. It starts about halfway down the page with "At a booksigning..."

Posted by: Bill R. at January 02, 2011 08:29 PM (EhlQq)

409 That would be Ann Margaret.

Posted by: Bill R. at January 02, 2011 08:29 PM (EhlQq)

410 "" Who would have thought that a company that uses Lucas for their electrical needs would name both a car and a motorcyle the same thing!""

Ah yes.... Lucas, the prince of darkness.

Posted by: Berserker at January 02, 2011 08:30 PM (gWHrG)

411 A true story about Ann Mararet and her gentlemen. It starts about halfway down the page with "At a booksigning..."

Posted by: Bill R. at January 03, 2011 12:29 AM (EhlQq)

So then I say to the GI, you are fighting for a lie! And the Saudis! And the Zionist cabal! Oh, and thanks for your service...chump.

And he didn't seem to take it well. Weird.

Posted by: Tim Robbins at January 02, 2011 08:31 PM (bgcml)

412 I somehow managed not to eat anything completely turrible today. But now the leftover holiday delicious death is calling to me....

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 08:32 PM (8uDC8)

413 The North, or actually the United States under Lincoln, fought to prevent that (unlawful, unconstitutional) secession. And won.

How would a state, or group of states, lawfully leave the Union?

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:32 PM (bgcml)

414 But now the leftover holiday delicious death is calling to me....

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 03, 2011 12:32 AM (8uDC

Everyone loves me.

Posted by: Black Forest Arsenic Cake at January 02, 2011 08:33 PM (bgcml)

415

Ah yes.... Lucas, the prince of darkness

It's great.....until the wires let the smoke get out.

Posted by: Bill R. at January 02, 2011 08:35 PM (EhlQq)

416 Bacon = Bad

Sausage = Faaaaabulous!

Posted by: Some San Franciscan at January 02, 2011 08:36 PM (xtR+a)

417 Lucas was dead before his company ever built anything electric. Poor devil was a teetotaler, and he went to Italy and drank the water. Triumph cars and Triumph motor cycles were not the same company.

I'm sorry, morons, I've had about enough for tonight. You're making me feel bad.

Posted by: comatus at January 02, 2011 08:36 PM (hrwMe)

418

#421

I was waiting for someone to actually blow that argument up with the obvious. Only took about 3 posts. I heard what I typed verbatim, ad nauseum, from three social studies teachers in high school. The last one believed Reagan was a Reptilian. Of course they often rambled this way just to bait both sides of the civil war argument nuts and gave me time to stare off into space or at the big tittied blonde who always wore buttoned shirts and would get red and start rambling about Northern Aggression. By the time we would get to the morality of slavery buttons one and two always came undone. God I loved history class.

Northerners also had a cheap source with thousands of young women working the looms in the cities, btw.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:37 PM (lV4Fs)

419 The North, or actually the United States under Lincoln, fought to prevent that (unlawful, unconstitutional) secession. And won.

I don't see how that could be construed as unconstitutional. The constitution simply doesn't address succession, and it isn't unreasonable to assume associations created voluntarily can be dissolved the same way.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 08:39 PM (QgI7g)

420 the morality of slavery

Why is it that you can get 10/10 liberals to argue that taking the fruits of labor of a group of people based on their race was wrong, but based on their nominal class is not?

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:40 PM (bgcml)

421 The deuce you say?

Doesn't surprise me though. San Fran-ians only want certain types of meat unregulated, alas, not those from the noble, dedicated pig.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at January 03, 2011 12:28 AM (c0A3e)

They have come after salt, happy meals, and food additives.

Bacon is the ultimate happy meal loaded with sodium and additives. It was only a matter of time.

Morons, THIS is the hill to die on.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:40 PM (lV4Fs)

422 The North, or actually the United States under Lincoln, fought to prevent that (unlawful, unconstitutional) secession. And won.

Alright, I'm going to play devil's advocate, but just for the purposes of debate:

I believe the Civil War was largely (though not entirely) the result of slavery. Why, though, was it unconstitutional and unlawful for those slave states to leave the U.S., but okay for them to leave Great Britain?

If representation and taxation were the only difference, would it have been okay for any U.S. territories 100 years ago, or today, to declare they're leaving the Union?

Posted by: AD at January 02, 2011 08:41 PM (9r1ux)

423 "That's about as pertinent as asking how you would go about lawfully taking your neighbour's life." How so? You don't know my neighbor.

Posted by: FRONT TOWARD LEFT at January 02, 2011 08:42 PM (xJVlJ)

424 They have come after salt, happy meals, and food additives.

The thing with the happy meals was that apparently McDonald's was unlawfully using toys to market their unhealthy food to children, and since children have their own source of money and transportation it was unreasonable to assume parents could prevent them from partaking. Or something like that.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 08:42 PM (QgI7g)

425 Also I was allowed the occasional happy meal when I was a kid. And I'm only kinda fat. Also when I was a kid I was scrawny as hell. So there

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 08:44 PM (XiSOm)

426 I often wonder if a state like texas actually had the balls to try and leave the US what would actually happen, especially under preznit toonces.

Posted by: Berserker at January 02, 2011 08:45 PM (gWHrG)

427 I don't see how that could be construed as unconstitutional. The constitution simply doesn't address succession, and it isn't unreasonable to assume associations created voluntarily can be dissolved the same way.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 03, 2011 12:39 AM (QgI7g)

Hell, if you really wanted to play dirty, because the Constitution doesn't address it, you could argue the 10th Amendment grants the states the power to decide.

(Again, I'm not advocating secession and I do think the right side won the Civil War. I just never did get a clear argument on this and I want to debate it a little.)

Posted by: AD at January 02, 2011 08:45 PM (9r1ux)

428 . Once a state has ratified the Constitution there is no lawful method of secession short of a Constitutional amendment.

Posted by: Slow Joe for Preznit 2011! at January 03, 2011 12:40 AM (Sl8d5)

Please point me to article in the Constitution that specifically gives the federal government the right to force a state to stay in the Union.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:46 PM (bgcml)

429

#445

and thank GOD the San Fransiscans also put checkpoints up on the golden gate bridge to keep young children from driving into Marin Country to snag fries, a cheeseburger, and a shitty Shrek 6 toy.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:46 PM (lV4Fs)

430 The Congress shall have Power to dispose of and make all needful Rules and Regulations respecting the Territory or other Property belonging to the United States".

This doesn't discuss whether the federal government in fact owns states. And if it did, would never have been ratified.

So again, please find the specific enumerated power.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 08:48 PM (bgcml)

431 How would a state, or group of states, lawfully leave the Union?

Same way South Carolina did it, but this time, have more guns on hand

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 08:48 PM (PaSAU)

432

Howdy folks, I gave the thread a quick scan. Shoulder rolls, fat recruits in fat recruits out, spend a grand to show up and ask for more at the wedding, did I miss anything>?

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 08:49 PM (R97p5)

433 Howdy folks, I gave the thread a quick scan. Shoulder rolls, fat recruits in fat recruits out, spend a grand to show up and ask for more at the wedding, did I miss anything>?

I have to wear a frilly magenta dress with poofy sleeves and a butt bow to Kaiya Averone's wedding.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 08:51 PM (8uDC8)

434

#454

The 482,421,229,438th argument on AoS about the Civil War

San Fransisco trying to regulate/ban bacon.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 08:52 PM (lV4Fs)

435 The Congress shall have Power to dispose of and make all needful Rules and Regulations respecting the Territory or other Property belonging to the United States

See, it's been a while since I've studied this, but I believe that referred to actual federal property and non-State territories as opposed to the U.S. as a whole (or, otherwise, that section would be even more damning than the Commerce Clause in trying to put limits on congressional power).

Like I mentioned, it's been a while, though, so I could be all wet there.

Posted by: AD at January 02, 2011 08:52 PM (9r1ux)

436 Howdy folks, I gave the thread a quick scan. Shoulder rolls, fat recruits in fat recruits out, spend a grand to show up and ask for more at the wedding, did I miss anything>?

Best. ONT thread. Ever.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 08:52 PM (XiSOm)

437 There is no "legal" way for one part of a nation to leave the rest behind, when the rest doesn't want it to leave. Not for the US, not for any nation. The way you do it is, you declare that you're going to leave, and then you win the war of independence. No victory = no independence.

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 08:53 PM (PaSAU)

438 AD @ 459: that's right, that power means that Congress has power over territory that isn't an actual state yet, not that Congress can establish any rule whatsoever in any state

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 08:54 PM (PaSAU)

439

You'll look loverly.

BTW I'm a guy. we recognize red, blue, green, purple (but don't like it), yellow and safety orange. Black and white aren't colors.

What's magenta?

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 08:56 PM (R97p5)

440 461 There is no "legal" way for one part of a nation to leave the rest behind, when the rest doesn't want it to leave. Not for the US, not for any nation. The way you do it is, you declare that you're going to leave, and then you win the war of independence. No victory = no independence.

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 12:53 AM (PaSAU)

Well, if that's the rules then the wrong side won the war, IMO. How is this any different from the American revolution?

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 08:57 PM (QgI7g)

441 What's magenta?

Slutty, dirty red.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 08:57 PM (fa9yq)

442

BTW I'm a guy. we recognize red, blue, green, purple (but don't like it), yellow and safety orange. Black and white aren't colors.

What's magenta?

A really loud eye-raping shade of pink.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 08:58 PM (8uDC8)

443 Well, if that's the rules then the wrong side won the war, IMO. How is this any different from the American revolution?

It's not, except for the result.

American Revolution: Colonies won, they got independence
Civil War: South lost, they didn't get independence

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:00 PM (PaSAU)

444 For the record, I'm not making anyone wear magenta. I'm leaning towards dark green. But magenta is so much funnier

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 09:00 PM (XiSOm)

445 A really loud eye-raping shade of pink.

That's fushia.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 09:00 PM (fa9yq)

446
I can't point you to that any more than I can point you to the law that says you have to adhere to the edicts of some arbitrary contract that you personally sign. But once you name is on the dotted line you're going to have a hard time convincing the judge otherwise.

Posted by: Slow Joe for Preznit 2011! at January 03, 2011 12:51 AM (Sl8d5)

So the Constitution is not in fact the Supreme Law of the land?

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

If you cannot quote a specific enumerated power to keep a state in the Union against its will, the Constitution does not grant one to the federal government.

If the text of the Constitution is superfluous, then no one ever agreed to what the de facto Supreme Law of the land happens to be and your comparison to a contract is even more invalid.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 09:00 PM (bgcml)

447 There is a little-known codicil in the United States constitution which gives the president unlimited power to preserve order in time of national emergency.

Posted by: James Madison Wormer at January 02, 2011 09:01 PM (Ys0KI)

448 That's fushia.

Same thing

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:01 PM (8uDC8)

449 Dude I'm as girly as it's possible to get while still being a nerd, and I have no idea what the difference between magenta and fuscia is.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 09:03 PM (XiSOm)

450 My frogs seem to be wrasslin'.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:04 PM (8uDC8)

451 There is no "legal" way for one part of a nation to leave the rest behind, when the rest doesn't want it to leave. Not for the US, not for any nation. The way you do it is, you declare that you're going to leave, and then you win the war of independence. No victory = no independence.

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 12:53 AM (PaSAU)

As a nation we are specifically on record that a state should be able to achieve independence peacefully, e.g: Kosovo

Not that the Kosovars were particularly peaceful - but such was our argument.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 09:05 PM (bgcml)

452 I've always thought magenta was a darker red, while fuschia was a slightly brighter, sluttier red

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:05 PM (PaSAU)

453 Dude I'm as girly as it's possible to get while still being a nerd, and I have no idea what the difference between magenta and fuscia is.

Because there isn't one!

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:05 PM (8uDC8)

454 I went flying tonight with a friend. He was the PIC. I was ballast. Windy inflation and he torched the throat, a little, on takeoff. We flew till the sun was nearly down and thankfully found a teeny tiny hole to put the balloon in. We were going about 6 knots and he drug the balloon thru about 10 feet of a tree on approach. Though we leaned a bit, the drag was sufficient to stop the forward momentum of the envelope. Note to the unfamiliar, there is about 5,000 lbs of air in the envelope. Try to imagine stopping a couple cars rolling at 6 miles an hour in 30 feet. Back to story. As we cleared the tree we swung, like a pendelum, forward once and back. He put it down solid on the ground. Perfect landing for the situation. The guy did a great job. Made him feel a little better after torching the throat earlier.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:06 PM (R97p5)

455 So, if you sign a contract, & that contract doesn't explicitly say that you have to obey the contract, the contract isn't valid? Is that your argument?

Posted by: Slow Joe for Preznit 2011! at January 03, 2011 12:53 AM (Sl8d5)

Poor analogy. The "contract" only allows the federal government very specific enumerated powers. No enumerated power, no such *legal* power for the federal government.

Posted by: 18-1 at January 02, 2011 09:06 PM (bgcml)

456 477 I've always thought magenta was a darker red, while fuschia was a slightly brighter, sluttier red

If Magenta and Fushia were hookers, Magenta would be 7 years older.

Posted by: ¤§EZB§¤ at January 02, 2011 09:07 PM (fa9yq)

457

San Fransisco trying to regulate/ban bacon.

The Hell you say! Time to throw them out of the Union.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:08 PM (R97p5)

458 As a nation we are specifically on record that a state should be able to achieve independence peacefully, e.g: Kosovo

Or Sudan. Happening as we speak.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 09:09 PM (QgI7g)

459 Ohh, my arms, they are sore. I do not feel like putting away dishes.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:09 PM (8uDC8)

460 Watching Cobra, Stallone kickin' some ass.

Posted by: booger at January 02, 2011 09:10 PM (9RFH1)

461 482

San Fransisco trying to regulate/ban bacon.

The Hell you say! Time to throw them out of the Union.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 03, 2011 01:08 AM (R97p5)

Oh no you don't! If that were to happen the Republic of San Fancisco would declare war on the US in an effort to reconnect with that supply of sweet, sweet OPM. I might add, as a resident of California, thank you in advance for all the tax money you'll be shoveling our way when we go belly up this year or next.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 09:11 PM (QgI7g)

462 My frogs seem to be wrasslin'.

THH, come sit down. We need to have a talk. You see, when two frogs love each other very, very much...

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 02, 2011 09:12 PM (xtR+a)

463 Ohh, my arms, they are sore. I do not feel like putting away dishes.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 03, 2011 01:09 AM (8uDC

A woman's place is in the House! Uh, wait that isn't what we mean.

Posted by: National Organization of Nagging Women at January 02, 2011 09:12 PM (bgcml)

464 As a nation we are specifically on record that a state should be able to achieve independence peacefully, e.g: Kosovo

Well that's not what happens in real life. Kosovo fought their own little war too (with our help).

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:13 PM (PaSAU)

465 THH, come sit down. We need to have a talk. You see, when two frogs love each other very, very much...

Yeah, except that isn't how they mate. The male swims behind the female and grabs her just in front of her legs, and she swims around releasing eggs, and he releases sperm into the water, and it all just kind of floats around together and then the eggs stick onto plants and stuff.

Seck-say.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:15 PM (8uDC8)

466

#488

Until 1922, nagging was considered a crime in England. A husband could have his wife placed in the public stocks for it.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 09:15 PM (lV4Fs)

467 So I think Psyche's just being a bitch to Eros because she can.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:16 PM (8uDC8)

468 and he releases sperm into the water, and it all just kind of floats around together and then the eggs stick onto plants and stuff.

Seck-say.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 03, 2011 01:15 AM (8uDC

Skeet floats. Who knew?

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 09:17 PM (lV4Fs)

469

Because the North was in the process of breaking the "contract" which was the Constitution. The Federal Government was overstepping its authority and dictating to the States.

And as the North had a higher population, it was going to control the Federal Government... thus if the Southern States wished to have the autonomy the Founders gave them... they had to leave.

Much like now... if the only arbiter of Federal Power, is the Federal Government itself... then in the end the only recourse if the Second Amendment.

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 03, 2011 12:03 AM (AdK6a)

The Southerners only believed in states rights when it was convenient. The Fugitive Slave laws allowed southern cops to take blacks south from any northern state without even a trial. When the Northern states protested, they were told to shut up.

It is impossible to look at the thirty years of history leading up to the war without slavery. Even the route of the transcontinental railroad was held up until after the war because the South wouldn't let it connect to any northern state. The Democratic party was spilt because Douglas had said that a territory (not a state) could ban slavery at any time.

What the south really feared by Lincolns election was that the Republican government jobs would result in a native Republican party in the states. Remember this was the era of the spoils system. The South was used to being able to inspect the federal mail looking for antislavery literature.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:17 PM (CN+Qv)

470 Bad guy in grocery store - " I got a bomb, come any closer and i'll blow the whole place up"

Cobra -"Go ahead, i don't shop here"

heh

Posted by: booger at January 02, 2011 09:18 PM (9RFH1)

471

Until 1922, nagging was considered a crime in England. A husband could have his wife placed in the public stocks for it.

Posted by: CAC at January 03, 2011 01:15 AM (lV4Fs)

Maybe we shouldn't have gone for that whole revolution thing.

Posted by: Some Moron from before 1922. at January 02, 2011 09:19 PM (bgcml)

472 It's not, except for the result.

American Revolution: Colonies won, they got independence
Civil War: South lost, they didn't get independence

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 01:00 AM (PaSAU)

I find that one of the most amusing parts about the Civil War - that the South keeps trying to say that it was all legal and everything.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:20 PM (CN+Qv)

473 This whole head-of-the-RNC thing is too much to bear.

Sorry in advance for the whining, but here we are with a philosophy that begins with the observation "I am a subset of the universe", and leads us on to construct a microcosm of some significant aspects of that. A lifetime of conscious deference to what can be measured, not just imagined. Scorn, sometimes, for those who need the "narrative", their fantasy campfires. We can work in the dark.

It's never what you expected, that undoes you, is it?

I always saw the self-ashamed compensatory libertine as one of the nastier strains of lefty. Worse, I can't conceive that any but such a gushing juvenile fantasist would invent some Raintsy Prepuce to rise and symbolize the target of his scorn, the butt of the joke, as it were. Damned bad luck? No, enemy action! Worse, it turns out the world really is a narrative, like the pages of some book, and the idiot children with paint cans really are writing it. I can't stand it.

Posted by: Forger at January 02, 2011 09:20 PM (id91m)

474 I've always thought magenta was a darker red, while fuschia was a slightly brighter, sluttier red

If Magenta and Fushia were hookers, Magenta would be 7 years older.

Posted by: Â¤Â§EZBÂ§Â¤ at January 03, 2011 01:07 AM (fa9yq)

I read that Magenta the color was named for a battle of Magenta, which was particulary bloody.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:21 PM (CN+Qv)

475 @ 490

Ahem, well, it seems you've got that all worked out. Now you understand why you're not allowed to be around boys and pools.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 02, 2011 09:22 PM (xtR+a)

476 Forger, Well said Dude. I couldn't have put it better myself. I mean that because I don't have a clue as to what the hell you're talking about.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:23 PM (R97p5)

477 So, even though it was about Slavery, it wasn't really about Slavery? Are you seriously trying to argue that? Have you actually read anything pertaining to the Slave-holding States's actual, explicit reasons for seceding? Does it not paint a very clear picture? Are you seriously confused by the repeated and pointed use of the word "slave", as in Slavery, Slave-holding, et al?

Posted by: Slow Joe for Preznit 2011! at January 03, 2011 12:12 AM (Sl8d5)

Hmmm... so in your view WW1 was CAUSED by the shooting of the Archduke?

And yes, I've read pretty extensivly about the period, including what the SOLDIERS themselves wrote.

Its like if there would ... oh... be a rebillion triggered by the EPAs CO2 Cap and trade Crap... the TRIGGER is the EPA action... but the cause is the unConstitutional power grab. Yet if that happened, I'm sure any documents written about the "rebellion" would talk about the EPA. Would the Greens, if THEY won, then tell us the rebellion was all about CO2?

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 09:24 PM (AdK6a)

478 436 Bacon = Bad

Sausage = Faaaaabulous!

Posted by: Some San Franciscan

You can bet that if "nitrates" are banned from bacon in SFO, they will demand that amyl nitrate be put into it.

Posted by: effinayright at January 02, 2011 09:24 PM (lhk1t)

479 I know something else that floats in water, but Kratos hasn't been sent off to bed yet so I shall refrain.

Posted by: CAC at January 02, 2011 09:25 PM (lV4Fs)

480 If Magenta and Fushia were hookers, Magenta would be 7 years older.

Posted by: Â¤Â§EZBÂ§Â¤ at January 03, 2011 01:07 AM (fa9yq)

But its Magenta, and Columbia...

Posted by: Dr. Frankenfurter at January 02, 2011 09:25 PM (AdK6a)

481

500?

I guess Douchebag-In-Chief doesn't know that it's unsportsmanlike to lay the pin on the green.

Oh, who am I kidding?

Posted by: ErikW at January 02, 2011 09:26 PM (ShWM3)

482 Forger, Well said Dude. I couldn't have put it better myself. I mean that because I don't have a clue as to what the hell you're talking about.

LOL good, I'm not the only one!!

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 02, 2011 09:26 PM (XiSOm)

483

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 03, 2011 01:24 AM (AdK6a)

Well when the Southerners wrote their consitution, there were only two differences. Slavery was explicitly named and recognized, and the President got one six year term.

I dont think the four year term was a big issue that caused the war

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:26 PM (CN+Qv)

484 490 THH, come sit down. We need to have a talk. You see, when two frogs love each other very, very much...

Yeah, except that isn't how they mate. The male swims behind the female and grabs her just in front of her legs, and she swims around releasing eggs, and he releases sperm into the water, and it all just kind of floats around together and then the eggs stick onto plants and stuff.

Seck-say.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 03, 2011 01:15 AM (8uDC

Trust me, it gets much more interesting and much worse than that.

Posted by: Dr. Alan Grant at January 02, 2011 09:26 PM (9r1ux)

485 Scolding wife.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:27 PM (8uDC8)

486 I shall step out for a moment whilst the debate over the Civil War is settled. I shall return, hopefully with lite fare to titlate your fancies. Dan

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:27 PM (R97p5)

487 Woops I was gonna make some trollpost pretending to be THH's dad in response to the other trollpost pretending to be THH's dad, then changed my mind, but forgot to change my handle back. Fail on my part.

THH's dad is perfectly innocent save for the fact that he is a raging sexual heterosaurus.

Posted by: Kaiya Averone at January 02, 2011 09:27 PM (XiSOm)

488 If that first picture is accurate, an 8 year old could snap him in two. Fly on the wall at an Easter Egg roll?

Posted by: Aunt Cranky at January 02, 2011 09:28 PM (S/q5/)

489 507 Forger, Well said Dude. I couldn't have put it better myself. I mean that because I don't have a clue as to what the hell you're talking about.

LOL good, I'm not the only one!!

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 03, 2011 01:26 AM (XiSOm)

Wait... what the??? Who the hell are you? *folds arms, glares at thisheavenlyhell's mom* Uh, honey, anything you want to tell me?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 02, 2011 09:31 PM (xtR+a)

490 Woops I was gonna make some trollpost pretending to be THH's dad in response to the other trollpost pretending to be THH's dad, then changed my mind, but forgot to change my handle back. Fail on my part.

Your first sockpuppet fail. *sniff* I'm so proud.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:32 PM (8uDC8)

491

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 03, 2011 01:26 AM (XiSOm)

Wait... what the??? Who the hell are you? *folds arms, glares at thisheavenlyhell's mom* Uh, honey, anything you want to tell me?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 03, 2011 01:31 AM (xtR+a)

As I was saying about the frogs . . .

Posted by: Dr. Alan Grant at January 02, 2011 09:33 PM (9r1ux)

492 O.D., I mean that the serious consideration of a manifestly squishy rhino with an openly liberal track record and a silly name to boot to head any sort of conservative is too absurd a thing to happen, even to people like us, without malicious intent driving it. I think we need to cut this ugly little foreskin off at the the root. Should have been done back when it should have been done.

Posted by: Forger at January 02, 2011 09:35 PM (id91m)

493 507) There was a degree of logicthere, 'then it t'ook a wrong turn at Albuquerque', I think Priebus (really) and Cino (you're putting me on, right) make Steele look like a Bircher

Posted by: justin cord at January 02, 2011 09:36 PM (c0+w5)

494 Well when the Southerners wrote their consitution, there were only two differences. Slavery was explicitly named and recognized, and the President got one six year term.

Well, that and there were no Northern states that could use weight of numbers to prevail on every issue.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 09:37 PM (QgI7g)

495

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 03, 2011 01:26 AM (XiSOm)

Wait... what the??? Who the hell are you? *folds arms, glares at thisheavenlyhell's mom* Uh, honey, anything you want to tell me?

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell's dad at January 03, 2011 01:31 AM (xtR+a)

As I was saying about the frogs . . .

Posted by: Dr. Alan Grant at January 03, 2011 01:33 AM (9r1ux)

Seems life finds a way.

Posted by: Dr. Ian Malcolm at January 02, 2011 09:37 PM (xtR+a)

496 Some say Slavery, I think property rights...wrong as it is, at the time slavery: buying, owning and selling was legal trade. The North wanted the south to give up their property with no compensation, and if you think that they are expensive now, they were even more expensive back then... The slave owners wanted to be compensated since they would now need to hire workers, it was a double economic loss to them. It would be the same today as telling every farmer that they had to turn in their tractors and get nothing for it, it meant doom to the southern economy...more than enough reason to fight on each side.

Posted by: Rob in Katy at January 02, 2011 09:39 PM (PiTBB)

497

This vid has been here before. Still funny. Three drunk rednecks and a dog on a quadrunner talk politics. She actually managed to embarass one of the other rednecks into covering his face. Apologies for the guy using the "N" word.

This is wrong on so many levels.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:40 PM (R97p5)

498 Well, that and there were no Northern states that could use weight of numbers to prevail on every issue.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 03, 2011 01:37 AM (QgI7g)

In a Democracy numbers are supposed to prevail.

Remember, the South got a bonus representation for their slaves, and outvoted the north unfairly for years.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:41 PM (CN+Qv)

499

I dont think the four year term was a big issue that caused the war

Posted by: Oldcat at January 03, 2011 01:26 AM (CN+Qv)

They did not NEED to change the Constitution, they just wanted the govenrment to ABIDE by the limitations it placed on a Federal Government.

It amazes me that folks today think large portions of NON SLAVE holding Southerners, would fight and die, for the slightly less than a third who did own slaves... especially in the Northern parts of the Confederacy, where the number of slave owners was much lower (much of the slave population was in the "deep" south).

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 02, 2011 09:42 PM (AdK6a)

500

Posted by: Rob in Katy at January 03, 2011 01:39 AM (PiTBB)

The Republican Party platform in 1860 admitted no desire or power to ban slavery in the states. It was against extension into territories - so no new slave states.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:43 PM (CN+Qv)

501

They did not NEED to change the Constitution, they just wanted the govenrment to ABIDE by the limitations it placed on a Federal Government.

Name one actual act before 1860 that the Feds did against the south or slavery. Fears don't count.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:44 PM (CN+Qv)

502

Posted by: Romeo13 at January 03, 2011 01:42 AM (AdK6a)

Slavery was both an economic system and a cultural system. It provided an answer to how blacks fit into the nation in the south - at the bottom. Even a free white got some value out of that.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:45 PM (CN+Qv)

503 I have to wear a frilly magenta dress with poofy sleeves and a butt bow to Kaiya Averone's wedding.

That would certainly drive me to drink!

Posted by: NC Ref at January 02, 2011 09:46 PM (VqMeI)

504 521, RiK, you win. I cede the pole position for most disturbing paradigm.

Posted by: Forger at January 02, 2011 09:47 PM (id91m)

505

Late to the party as usual and to offer my golf commentary, is it just me or does President Obama McDonald need some new kicks? Does FootJoy make oversize DryJoys for clowns?

It also looks like Barry is protecting his birthing hips by hiking his khakis way up to hide the golf balls he likes to cheat with. Maybe he's showing solidarity with Michelle and her boob belts.

Posted by: ErikW at January 02, 2011 09:47 PM (ShWM3)

506 I have never ridden in a Mini-Copper before till today. Now I have ridden in two. I used to really think very little of them. I thought they were a piece of crap and a death machine. The jury is still out for me on the death machine part and they don't look like much to me but I was impressed. Both had perky little drive trains hitting 60 or 70 quickly and driving as smooth as glass. The front seats had sufficient leg room but I lost a bit of that when the other pilot got in the backseat. The most impressive thing was the ride at 60 plus on back roads. The guy in the second one said he had done 105 on a a curvy back road. Bizarre.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:48 PM (R97p5)

507 Oops, stumbled into the Civil War. While I'm sure its an interesting and educational discussion, I'm out. G'night and Happy New Year!

Posted by: NC Ref at January 02, 2011 09:48 PM (VqMeI)

508 It amazes me that folks today think large portions of NON SLAVE holding Southerners, would fight and die, for the slightly less than a third who did own slaves... especially in the Northern parts of the Confederacy, where the number of slave owners was much lower (much of the slave population was in the "deep" south).

Oh that's easy. They did it because they were patriots, not necessarily because they loved or hated slavery one way or another. That, and they didn't get much choice in the matter (the Confederacy had a draft too).

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:49 PM (PaSAU)

509 The most impressive thing was the ride at 60 plus on back roads. The guy in the second one said he had done 105 on a a curvy back road. Bizarre.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 03, 2011 01:48 AM (R97p5)

Little cars (what we used to call rice rockets) have pretty nice pickup.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:50 PM (CN+Qv)

510 close your eyes and you would have no idea you were doing 60+

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:51 PM (R97p5)

511 yeah Mini Coopers look kinda neat, but then I remember who makes them - Chrysler, aka A Division of Obama Motors, so I won't be buying one. ever.

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:52 PM (PaSAU)

512 BTW has Chrysler gone under yet?

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:52 PM (PaSAU)

513 Oh that's easy. They did it because they were patriots, not necessarily because they loved or hated slavery one way or another. That, and they didn't get much choice in the matter (the Confederacy had a draft too).

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 01:49 AM (PaSAU)

Yes once push comes to shove both sides took up arms. A lot of Democrats who wanted to let them go became fervent supporters of the war once the South fired on Fort Sumter. And of course, some did not fight - West Virgina seceded in favor of the north, the border states did not go, and substantial numbers in mountain Tenessee and Alabama fought for the North

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:53 PM (CN+Qv)

514 537 BTW has Chrysler gone under yet?

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 01:52 AM (PaSAU)

Lately?

Posted by: AD at January 02, 2011 09:55 PM (9r1ux)

515 I agree, I will never buy a Chrysler or GM car again. For me it's Ford or foreign. I am a stubburn SOB and elephants have a long memory.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:55 PM (R97p5)

516 Slavery was both an economic system and a cultural system. It provided an answer to how blacks fit into the nation in the south - at the bottom. Even a free white got some value out of that.

Oh really? A sharecropper would want to support a system where his labor was in competition with that of slaves?

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 09:55 PM (QgI7g)

517 On the Civil War thing I'm gonna blow the ending. The North wins and the victor writes the history books. Goodnight all.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 02, 2011 09:57 PM (R97p5)

518

Well since he would be ridden out of town on a rail if he did try and overturn slavery, he might as well look on the bright side. Or emigrate.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:58 PM (CN+Qv)

519 I must go sleepytimes too. Night 'rons.

Posted by: thisheavenlyhell at January 02, 2011 09:58 PM (8uDC8)

520 Oh here's an answer to my own question
Chrysler IPO coming in 2011
but the article makes it sound like Chrysler is so hopeless, the IPO may not even happen in 2011
but I am glad to see that the "loans" (like they'll get repaid! ha!) that Chrysler got are at 14% interest - they deserve a high interest rate

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 09:58 PM (PaSAU)

521 ^{*pointing at Obumbles too far above the knee golf attire*}

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Posted by: LPGA tour players at January 02, 2011 09:58 PM (xtR+a)

522

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 03, 2011 01:48 AM (R97p5)

I've heard they're fun to drive because you can grind the gears without much worry and just generally raise hell with them.

I'd like to take one for a spin.

Posted by: ErikW at January 02, 2011 09:59 PM (ShWM3)

523

Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 01:58 AM (PaSAU)

Kind of odd calling it an IPO when they presumably had one already

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 09:59 PM (CN+Qv)

524 Oh really? A sharecropper would want to support a system where his labor was in competition with that of slaves?

there was virtually no sharecropping before the Civil War - there was no need for it. so it is a moot question.

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 10:00 PM (PaSAU)

525 there was virtually no sharecropping before the Civil War - there was no need for it. so it is a moot question.

According to wikipedia "Prior to emancipation, sharecropping was limited to poor landless whites, usually working marginal lands for absentee landlords."

In other words, "limited to" the bulk of the white population, and the bulk of the people that would end up doing the actual fighting. How many plantation owners do you think there were as a percentage of the total white population?

I don't think it's a moot question at all.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 10:11 PM (QgI7g)

526 537
BTW has Chrysler gone under yet?
Posted by: chemjeff at January 03, 2011 01:52 AM (PaSAU)

You mean, "... gone under yet again?" No, but it's genetic for them and so is only a matter of time.

Posted by: ya2daup at January 02, 2011 10:13 PM (yRrAd)

527

Okay. That photo of Obama golfing? Those black and white saddle shoes?

Gay. The President is gay.

_NTTAWWT

Posted by: Jones at January 02, 2011 10:17 PM (b+yWd)

528 In other words, "limited to" the bulk of the white population, and the bulk of the people that would end up doing the actual fighting. How many plantation owners do you think there were as a percentage of the total white population?

I don't think it's a moot question at all.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 03, 2011 02:11 AM (QgI7g)

There were a number of small family farms in the South. You can't go saying that the farmers were all slaveowners and that all nonslaveowners were landless. Some slaves were landowners and owned slaves themselves.

Reality is complicated.

Posted by: Oldcat at January 02, 2011 10:18 PM (CN+Qv)

529

BTW, my analysis of Obama's contorted figure while his putt curved left towards the hole before lipping out is that he lacks confidence.

We already knew that, it just sucks to realize that our Commander-in-Chief is a coward.

Posted by: ErikW at January 02, 2011 10:19 PM (ShWM3)

530 Mini Coopers aren't made by Chrysler, but by BMW. That's why they're usually sold alongside BMWs.

Posted by: Otis Criblecoblis at January 02, 2011 10:37 PM (fjoLg)

531 555 Mini Coopers aren't made by Chrysler, but by BMW. That's why they're usually sold alongside BMWs.

oh you're right, duh - I was thinking of PT Cruisers

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 10:40 PM (PaSAU)

532 okay good night all

Posted by: chemjeff at January 02, 2011 10:46 PM (PaSAU)

533 Wait a cotton pickin minute here.

Posted by: Rick Sanchez at January 02, 2011 11:11 PM (SJ6/3)

534 And Schwarzenegger leaves office pretty much as you'd expect, doing his utmost to help a Democrat.

Thanks Arnold for all the hard work -- for the other guys:

Schwarzenegger reduces sentence of Fabian NuÃ±ez's son
Sunday January 2

Esteban NuÃ±ez, son of the former [Democratic] Assembly speaker, had been sentenced to 16 years in prison after pleading guilty to voluntary manslaughter in the October 2008 stabbing death of a student during a fight near San Diego State. The governor's executive action, announced on his last day in office, commutes the sentence to seven years.

Schwarzenegger's statement notes that Nunez did not inflict the fatal knife wound, but was involved in the fight. The case has been sensitive all along due to the influence held by Nunez's father.

LAObserved

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at January 02, 2011 11:12 PM (we2xK)

535 I am a new arctic hybrid.

Posted by: ManBearPig at January 02, 2011 11:16 PM (SJ6/3)

536 There were a number of small family farms in the South. You can't go saying that the farmers were all slaveowners and that all nonslaveowners were landless. Some slaves were landowners and owned slaves themselves.

I find it difficult to believe most white people owned slaves. People who made their living through some kind of labor (like farming) would have been competing directly with slave labor in the labor market whether or not they owned the land.

Posted by: Ace's liver at January 02, 2011 11:39 PM (QgI7g)

537

At least our goofy bastard Dipshit-In-Chief found a way to look like a fucking clown. Again

I think Frank J. spoofed this once or thrice but it might be worth a repeat.

Posted by: ErikW at January 02, 2011 11:44 PM (ShWM3)

538 Well, our awesome combined US Force will not be that easily deterred. Happy New Year and a hearty fuck you all.

Posted by: goldbricker esq at January 02, 2011 11:53 PM (h2t8r)

539 And now Arnold wants to shill for this administration. I don't watch his movies anymore. How would you like to be the studio that has put up millions to produce movies with actors and actresses such as Shawn Penn, Jane Fonda, Arnold, O. J. Simpson and folks like themm only to have them turn off half the population with their words and actions. Oh I forgot, the studios are leftist commies also. Screw em.

Posted by: Ohio Dan at January 03, 2011 12:53 AM (R97p5)

540 When the north threw the constitution under the bus the south had every reason to leave the union. The great president Lincoln could not come up with a better plan to keep the union together than war? Lincoln wanted war. Not because of the slave issue but for federal power over the states. Well he got it and here we are. And Washington D.C. just keeps getting bigger and taking more of all of our rights away. The slave issue was nothing more than pr. that Linclon hid behind. But whatever, after a bloody war the slaves were free so the ends justify the means.

Posted by: Case at January 03, 2011 01:12 AM (0K+Kw)

541 The great president Lincoln could not come up with a better plan to keep the union together than war? Lincoln wanted war. Not because of the slave issue but for federal power over the states. Well he got it and here we are. And Washington D.C. just keeps getting bigger and taking more of all of our rights away.

Wow.

Revision much?

Judge Andrew Napolitano raises some legitimate points but... Jeebus!

Tell me again about how Lincoln fired on Ft. Sumpter again, George.

Posted by: Deety at January 03, 2011 01:37 AM (Jb3+B)

542 Tell me again about how Lincoln fired on Ft. Sumpter again, George.

Posted by: Deety at January 03, 2011 05:37 AM (Jb3+B)

AH we are trying to get a flame war going early today. The actual "revisionist history" began on day 1 with the propaganda pushed forth.

The war began when Lincoln dispatched troops with provisions from NYC to Charleston. Look at it this way. Suppose the U.S. finally grew some brains and decided to get out of the U.N. Then they ordered the U.N. and all its offices to leave the U.S. Then they all left except the office in NYC which armed up and then the European powers dispatched troops and arms to NYC to reinforce the U.N. there.

Posted by: Vic at January 03, 2011 02:10 AM (M9Ie6)

543 F&F making a big deal of Obama signing the bogus 9-11 health care bill for another 4.2 billion dollars for NYC.

Nobody anywhere in the MFM has told the truth about this BS bill. Could it be because not only do they all suck Obama's balls, but they all broadcast out of NYC.

This money really has NOTHING to do with taking care of "poor" 9-11 responders.

Posted by: Vic at January 03, 2011 02:19 AM (M9Ie6)

544 1966 T120C...but that clock looks chronometric so I'm not sure.

Posted by: torabora at January 03, 2011 02:21 AM (3ueax)

545

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Posted by: China-store at January 03, 2011 04:36 AM (t24Na)

546 Did the Farnsworth Fusor work? Yes it did. Farnsworth was able to ignite a fusion plasma with his desktop device - which none of the multi-billion dollar government fusion experiments have been able to do in the years since.

The Fusor does have a problem though, once the fusion plasma ignites the high temperature prevents any additional fuel from entering the burning plasma and it quickly burns out. As a result no one has been able to get more energy out of one than it requires to get the burn started.

The Fusor is the basis for the Bussard fusion experiments which do hold some possibility of success.

Sadly both Farnsworth and Bussard had untimely deaths that destroyed the progress of the experiments.

Besides the television Farnsworth also invented the photomultiplier tube and the first night vision devices during WWII.

Bussard is well known in science fiction circles for his idea of the Bussard ram jet (a fusion engine for ultra high speed flights between stars).

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