Team Moron,

I just read the saddest thing ever:

via Ruth Marcus at WaPo

"The danger posed by the constitutional conservative approach is to attempt to lash together debates about what the federal government should do and what the Constitution allows it to do."

OMG!?  Is it this bad already?!  Living Constitution, indeed.

Ah, hockey! I'm looking forward to the start of the season. I got the NHL Center Ice last year and is was worth it so I'm getting it again.

Watching the video brought back memories. Mostly stuff like "whatever happened to Probert anyway??" and "Mother of God, those Canucks early 80's uniforms were butt ugly."

 GO PENGUINS!!

"liquor store gun store liquor store gun store where the fuck are you taking me?!?!" that line gets me every time with Chappelle. I live in Rialto. Literally that's all that exists down Baseline ave (oh and "EBT accepted here" being prominantly displayed everywhere, including at least 1 gun store).

stillers

email me at silentcal1929 at yahoo dot com  if you want to play in the Moron Fantasy hockey league

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at September 16, 2011 10:18 PM (c0A3e)

Getting drunker on my only Friday night off all fall.  Finally got moved into my new place, I hate fkn moving.  But its close to work and saves me a ton on gas so that's good.  And the guy had Fox news on when I came to check the place out, so he's a racist like me.

Yo Morons

Posted by: HeatherRadish at September 16, 2011 10:24 PM (0vDuM)

How you doin?

I see you won  in Fantasy last week.  Good luck this week....since I'm not playing you....

Posted by: eastvalleyphx at September 16, 2011 10:11 PM (qiOph)

After I am done with you in the "foreplay" you will be unable to make sammiches, bitch

And the guy had Fox news on when I came to check the place out, so he's a racist like me.
===================

Maybe he's just stalking Megyn Kelly, like you.

Posted by: CAC at September 16, 2011 10:15 PM (LdSq+)

What really pissed me off when I was back home in CA was the local Taco Bell advertising in storefront displays that they took EBT cards.  WTF!

Posted by: The War Between the Undead States at September 16, 2011 10:29 PM (KoclC)

Chicks, huh?  Whaddaya gonna do?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:33 PM (s7mIC)

I am already there. Now make me a sammich

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:33 PM (s7mIC)

 It's like some damn woman came along and posted the ONT.

Women can raise an ONT wonderfully, just like kids, single or not, overwhelming evidence, notwithstanding.

(and now I'm done)

Seriously, hope all da Moe Rons are having a good Friday Night. 

I'm chillin with some Rebecca Black, drinkin some Pinot Grigio.  Big Pimpin in other words.  Don't hate.

What really pissed me off when I was back home in CA was the local Taco Bell advertising in storefront displays that they took EBT cards.  WTF!

Posted by: NC Ref

Yeah, but you really get a lot of food for your money at Taco Bell.

Just sayin'.

I am already there. Now make me a sammich

Will you SHUT UP already?  The game is on!!!

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:33 PM (s7mIC)

check.

Yeah, but you really get a lot of food for your money at Taco Bell.

Just sayin'.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at September 16, 2011 10:36 PM (sJTmU)

brb, about to kill another profitable business....

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy

They come mostly at night, they do.

Mostly.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:33 PM (s7mIC)

Posted by: Robert at September 16, 2011 10:34 PM (4q6A5)

You betcha squared!

I'm already two martinis in and so happy that the ONT is up.

Da Bears!!!

DA BEARS!!!!!!!!!!!

new orleans will get beat like a little boy's ass in micheal jackson's bedroom

 Maybe it's better when I don't try....


lol

You sound like Dagny....she who still has Peyton Manning as a starter in week two.....

Well, yes, you did win.  Care to trade me your best player for a kicker or something? 

In all seriousness, take a looksy, you have a real chance to compete.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo (NJConservative) at September 16, 2011 10:18 PM (LH6ir)

Yes I do.

Oh and @twiceblessedmom

hey!

Will you SHUT UP already?  The game is on!!!

I show you a game in a second , bubba. You will wake up praying to Buddah

They come mostly at night, they do.

Mostly.

Uh, Huda Naccache?

btw CBD

I don't think Jimbo will be much of a problem. DU trolls who fake racism then go "OMGZ LOOK AT THE BLOGGZ RACIST!" are few and far between these days.

Very rarely do we have an actual stray from strom frontmond.

Posted by: TwinPeaksMom at September 16, 2011 10:41 PM (HjxoE)

I see what you did there.

The best was the deep fried watermelon.

Deep fried KoolAid was pretty close behind that though, like eating a cake donut filled with a pixistick.

Deep fried ribs and deep fried avocado were both blah. The first too salty, the second too mushy.

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at September 16, 2011 10:44 PM (HjxoE)

I'm feeling like I need to send an 'ette photo to Maet but your photo has me completely intimidated. You rock, Lady.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at September 16, 2011 10:27 PM (JdI+R)

I'll try to get with GGE about a date and time, he's been working on one for a while.  For the Black Amex, you'll have to find TxJew with all his sweet oil money, I'm just trying to get drunk off this cheap Beast Ice.  And its working!

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 10:43 PM (otfJ1)

I like the aggressive side, in a heterosexual way, of course

Posted by: twiceblessedmom

There was no deity involved here.

Posted by: Spiker at September 16, 2011 10:41 PM (4t9J5) 

<<_<<

>>_>>

Lyzanxia - Unsu

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 10:43 PM (otfJ1)

I like the aggressive side, in a heterosexual way, of course

Posted by: Ma Bell at September 16, 2011 10:46 PM (H/MnC)

Lol-ing ovah heah.

Isn't this special, Olive Garden, Michelle Obamas anti-obesity partner receive a health care bill waiver.

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at September 16, 2011 10:45 PM (HjxoE)

I was infuriated when I found out there was no deep fried butter.

However, OC Fair 2012 is next year, and they have Deep Fried Butter and a new monstrosity- Deep Fried Bacon Wrapped Hot Dog on a Stick.

Isn't this special, Olive Garden, Michelle Obamas anti-obesity partner receive a health care bill waiver.

you're fucking kidding me - did this happen just recently?

god I hate these people

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at September 16, 2011 10:46 PM (JdI+R)

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at September 16, 2011 10:47 PM (HjxoE)

Okay. I will. Soon. I don't think I should do it this week because it would give away the answer on "Who's the moronette?" but I will do it soon. I think I need to get a current pic so I can include an Ace of Spades in the pic.I have a friend coming to visit next weekend. I'll hand him the camera and see if we can get something good.

Posted by: chemjeff

It's entropy, dude. Everything returning to a more disordered, lower energy state.

And it never stops.

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at September 16, 2011 10:49 PM (HjxoE)

awsum

bet it will be fun

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 10:47 PM (otfJ1)

Hon, you're from Alabama, right? Till last year I lived in Kentucky, now I am in northern California, and I am German. Talk about a fucked up german southern broad living in a hellhole

you're fucking kidding me - did this happen just recently?

god I hate these people

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:50 PM (s7mIC)

I forgot the link, I will go get it

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 10:43 PM (otfJ1)

Go with that feeling.

Okay, my balls twitched and that's the signal that I need to up the dosage.

Caution, utter annihilation to follow.

Gojira - The Art Of Dying

Believe it or not, these dudes?  Also French.

chemjeff.

Yeah the costs add up.

I've had to replace my roof, driveway, boiler(covered by warranty), and my water heater blew up but that was still under warranty too.

It's not just paying for the fixes, it's finding a trustworthy contractor to do the work, assuming you can't do it yourself.

Posted by: Papa Editor at September 16, 2011 10:48 PM (FZZ94)

We appreciate your contribution of your personal credit information.  You will be fucked over soon.  Thank you for playing PlayStationNetwork, please come again.

Olive Garden/Michelle link

http://tinyurl.com/42c29p5

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 10:52 PM (/ybwc)

that is great news for your mom!  how is she doing now?

Somewhat flattered? wow, that would cost a lot of blowjobs in my world

------------------

Wait, what?

Posted by: Peaches

Not a bit , kiddo.  People have wondered about your Mom since you told us she had the big C.  Here's hoping she can recover!

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 10:52 PM (/ybwc)

Great news, Peaches.  May God continue to be with your mom during her recovery and may He be with you and your family for comfort.  Thoughts and prayers...

Posted by: robtr at September 16, 2011 10:54 PM (MtwBb)

oh so they received the ObamaCare waiver last year

so it wasn't a quid pro quo thing, it was a "I'm totally on board with your whole dealie-o" thing

I will never go to Olive Garden again

Posted by: crisis du jour at September 16, 2011 10:30 PM (J1eJz)

Which one, crisis?  They're all pretty funny.

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 10:47 PM (otfJ1)

Hon, you're from Alabama, right? Till last year I lived in Kentucky, now I am in northern California, and I am German. Talk about a fucked up german southern broad living in a hellhole

Posted by: Ma Bell at September 16, 2011 10:52 PM (H/MnC)

Well, actually, I'm from El Paso, TX. I'm a military brat. I've been in North Alabama since the late 70s. I always thought I'd get the hell out of here as soon as possible but my daughter started giving me grandgirls so I'm not racing out of the area. (Caveat: grannie but in my 40s). I see the girls about once a month. I could do that from anywhere. My big concern these days is continued employment. I'm working on a gomerment job. I'm an Irish/French/Serbian/Danish mutt. And I can speak the language of the redneck (and the Latino).

We appreciate your contribution of your personal credit information.  You will be fucked over soon.  Thank you for playing PlayStationNetwork, please come again.

Posted by: The Russian Mob at September 16, 2011 10:54 PM (/izg2)

Yeah, like I was stupid enough to put any kind of personal information on my account.  Retards.

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at September 16, 2011 10:54 PM (HjxoE)

Thanks, sweetie.  I'm going down there to see them on Wednesday.  What happened with Bebe?  I am too sprung to troll through all the comments.

oh so they received the ObamaCare waiver last year

so it wasn't a quid pro quo thing, it was a "I'm totally on board with your whole dealie-o" thing

I will never go to Olive Garden again

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:56 PM (s7mIC)

Or their chit came due

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 10:52 PM (/ybwc)

That's good news Peaches!  Have you spoken to her?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at September 16, 2011 10:55 PM (JdI+R)

I've got pics.  Bwahahahahahaha!!!

_{Fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap.........}

Posted by: Spiker at September 16, 2011 10:49 PM (4t9J5)

They had their problems with GOPAC, I think they'd really object to my ritual rimjobbing of Mary Katherine Ham.

Gojira - Vacuity

#183

I noticed your faps were awfully small.

Peach,

Great news, pray for her speedy recovery.

Gojira - The Art Of Dying

Believe it or not, these dudes?  Also French.

Posted by: Robert at September 16, 2011 10:53 PM (4q6A5)

Jebus, Robert. Awesome. Completely awesome. Love this. (caveat: I'm a closet metal head) Do you like Murderdolls? Anthrax? Megadeth? I've been the older person at concerts that everyone looks at in suspicion wondering if I'm there looking for my kid. Usually, my kid is there with me thrashing.

Posted by: Tami at September 16, 2011 10:58 PM (X6akg)

Oh, God, no!  My dad sent me an email with her room number and the warning "under no circumstances call her tonight, she is very cranky."  No shit, sherlock.

Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for your prayers and your well-wishes and your concern and your friendship.  It means more than I could ever express.

#183

I noticed your faps were awfully small.

Trying to be discreet.  Its early.

Trying to be discreet.  Its early.

Posted by: NC Ref at September 16, 2011 11:03 PM (/izg2)

So when your girlfriend asks why it's small, you tell her "it is trying to be respectfully inconspicuous?"

Vollllllvo.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:02 PM (s7mIC)

Silly chemjeff, that will be a group effort .  .  . but I will make sure they don't violate you while you are unable to give informed consent.  That is my promise to you.

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 10:56 PM (otfJ1)

Good for your grand girls. My granddaughter died a few minutes after birth and all my kids live in CA now, so they made me move out here cause they can't live without Mama. I am loving them all the more for it

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 10:52 PM (/ybwc)

Nice.  Glad to hear it.  And may she keep battling Peaches.  Hope she has a speedy recovery.

So when your girlfriend asks why it's small, you tell her "it is trying to be respectfully inconspicuous?"

Vollllllvo.

Posted by: CAC at September 16, 2011 11:04 PM (LdSq+)

Heh I'm confident enough to carry purses in public.  Ever hear the story about the Lion, the Mouse and the Ferrari?

Jebus, Robert. Awesome. Completely awesome. Love this. (caveat: I'm a closet metal head) Do you like Murderdolls? Anthrax? Megadeth? I've been the older person at concerts that everyone looks at in suspicion wondering if I'm there looking for my kid. Usually, my kid is there with me thrashing.

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 11:01 PM (otfJ1)

I worship at the house that Dave Mustaine built.  Megadeth and Anthrax both have new albums coming out.  The new Anthrax might already be out.  It's a good year for the old school guys.

Now here's something that'll make you groove before tearing you a new asshole.

Gojira - Flying Whales

Posted by: Reno_Dave at September 16, 2011 10:55 PM (OL4L4)

So glad you're safe. Spent a portion of the evening texting and calling because some of my family went there for the races. In true moron fashion, they were drinking in the hotel when it happened. Their texts are terse--just that they're safe. I think they probably knew the pilot, and they're trying to see if anyone they knew was hit by the plane.

Heh I'm confident enough to carry purses in public.  Ever hear the story about the Lion, the Mouse and the Ferrari?

Posted by: NC Ref at September 16, 2011 11:07 PM (/izg2)

I'm confident enough to buy tampons and Midol for the lady.

I'm that gangsta.

Man, I am feeling good tonight, much like Glen Rice in the 1989 Championship game Vs. Seton Hall.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:02 PM (s7mIC)

Silly chemjeff, that will be a group effort .  .  . but I will make sure they don't violate you while you are unable to give informed consent.  That is my promise to you.

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 11:05 PM (/ybwc)

Don't worry, we'll hav e things under control.

*Snaps surgical glove on hand*

Man, I am feeling good tonight, much like Glen Rice in the 1989 Championship game Vs. Seton Hall.

Posted by: Delta Smelt at September 16, 2011 11:09 PM (dWPyO)

TIME OUT!!!!!!!

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:07 PM (s7mIC)

Ya goofy bastard, the unconscious can't pitch, they can only catch.  Let me know if you need me to back your play . . . 

Posted by: Ma Bell at September 16, 2011 11:07 PM (H/MnC)

Ma Bell, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss but I'm glad to hear that you have joy in you life.

I'm confident enough to buy tampons and Midol for the lady.

Alpha for the former in certain circumstances, beta for the latter.

Midol is for old ladies.

(I'm messing with you.)

So Pennsylvania....thoughts?....but only if Undead chimes in......

G'night, TBM. You are awesome. So glad I've had the opportunity to "meet" you.

Robert, you are seriously rocking my world.

I always wanted to write a math paper in iambic pentameter.  It has to be a short proof, but so important that they have to accept it.

I would consider it the pinnacle of my career.

So Pennsylvania....thoughts?....but only if Undead chimes in......

Posted by: Delta Smelt at September 16, 2011 11:12 PM (dWPyO)

Lets split it.

War I know you are lurking somewhere.

Let PA split its electoral votes up by district, and we carry 10-11 EV's, even if Obama stuffs ballots HIMSELF in Philly.

I say we win the state outright right now though.

TIME OUT!!!!!!!

Posted by: Chris Webber at September 16, 2011 11:11 PM (/izg2)

4 years later in 93 against UNC.

Rumeal Robinson hit some key free throws in 89 against Seton Hall.  Glenn Rice got all the accolades though I guess...

Posted by: twiceblessedmom at September 16, 2011 11:11 PM (HjxoE)

Night tbm!

Let PA split its electoral votes up by district, and we carry 10-11 EV's, even if Obama stuffs ballots HIMSELF in Philly.

YES - splitting the EV's so fucking helps us, and you know what?  that is exactly what R governors and R legislatures in otherwise squishy states like PA and MI should do.  after all that is exactly what the D's have done for years.

I say we win the state outright right now though.

I am more skeptical, the D machine is strong, but I hope you are right

Let PA split its electoral votes up by district, and we carry 10-11 EV's, even if Obama stuffs ballots HIMSELF in Philly.

For selfish reasons I love this idea...out of principle/precedent, not so much. 

I like the electoral college.  The left tried to do this in Colorado before in was overtly a purple state.

Anyway, I ain't up for that debate.  I just want to see you and War shoot it out....

Or JeffB and everyone else.

Whatever....Entertain me!

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:19 PM (s7mIC)

I can't recall what the fem equivalent of fapping is but... me, too.

I say we win the state outright right now though.

Posted by: CAC at September 16, 2011 11:15 PM (LdSq+)

Yes, but I think that if PA splits its votes, we don't even have to campaign there and we win 270.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:19 PM (s7mIC)

Walker, Kasich, Corbett and whoever the fuck governs Michigan should get together and all do this.

It would guarantee the GOP 32 electoral votes at least, but 37 are easily reachable- without carrying a single one of those states.

We could lose all 4 of those states and still win the election- without carrying NH, CO, NM, IA, NV, or even Virginia.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:19 PM (s7mIC)

This is not Fapplebee's.  You know that, right, Mr. Swanky Furniture?

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at September 16, 2011 11:16 PM (ZDUD4)

You'd think someone with poet in his name would be familiar with that

I can't recall what the fem equivalent of fapping is but... me, too.

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 11:19 PM (otfJ1)

*wqik wqik wqik wqik*

*wqik wqik wqik wqik*

Posted by: CAC at September 16, 2011 11:21 PM (LdSq+)

Bwahahahha! Thank you. I'll try to remember that.

I can't recall what the fem equivalent of fapping is but... me, too.

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 11:19 PM (otfJ1)

*click* *Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*

Be careful what you wish for as for as this electoral splitting bidness....

Then again, I'm an old curmudgeon "in a super good looking and charming body of course", who longs for the days when the state legislature appointed senators.

Posted by: Reno_Dave at September 16, 2011 11:22 PM (OL4L4)

This.  Its a small world.

Posted by: buzzion at September 16, 2011 11:24 PM (GULKT)

I can do that but don't want to cause a brown out in my neighborhood. Or, try to explain to the paramedics my unexpected perm. It's hell being a single gal.

We could lose all 4 of those states and still win the election- without carrying NH, CO, NM, IA, NV, or even Virginia.

Posted by: CAC at September 16, 2011 11:21 PM (LdSq+)

Stop it or you'll get me all worked up!

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 11:29 PM (/ybwc)

I'm good with that. Fapfapfapfap.

Stop it or you'll get me all worked up!

Posted by: AmishDude at September 16, 2011 11:28 PM (73tyQ)

Blow your load at this-

we would gain 4 from Wisconsin, 12 from Ohio, 12 from Pennsylvania, 9 from Michigan. Again, without carrying the state. Detroit, Madison, Philly, and Cleveland would be rendered worthless for fraud.

Posted by: Michael the Hobbit at September 16, 2011 11:19 PM (KqQ0V)

wellcome to the ONT.... we might fight like brothers and sisters at times.... but we love each other, guess you could call us the ONT...........  did anyone tell you we drink and Obama is a sturrering clusterfuck of a miserable failure?

Posted by: Spiker at September 16, 2011 11:32 PM (4t9J5)

Lunacy at that point. He carries DC, Hawaii, Maryland, Rhode Island, Vermont, and Massachusetts at an absolute minimum, and almost certainly Illinois, Delaware, and California.

we would gain 4 from Wisconsin, 12 from Ohio, 12 from Pennsylvania, 9 from Michigan. Again, without carrying the state. Detroit, Madison, Philly, and Cleveland would be rendered worthless for fraud.

And in a couple years, when the mood has swung a bit, Dim Govs/legislatures would do the same thing to us right?

Or should we just go to a direct national vote and be done with it?  No thanks.

Or should we just go to a direct national vote and be done with it?  No thanks.

Posted by: Delta Smelt at September 16, 2011 11:35 PM (dWPyO)

That is the downside to it. It can always swing back.

I say we win the state outright right now though.

Horseshit. 

Posted by: Spiker at September 16, 2011 11:35 PM (4t9J5)

Horseshit. 

Posted by: The War Between the Undead States at September 16, 2011 11:39 PM (KxADM)

And theeeeeeeeeeeeeeere you are.

Btw war, who plays "Bug Eyed" Bachmann in the Nailin Palyn sequel?

and are you pro/anti dividing PA's electoral votes?

Posted by: Joffen at September 16, 2011 11:40 PM (IKm9D)

fuck off, Moby

That is the downside to it. It can always swing back.

Like a swing pass from the elbow to Glen Rice in the corner for a wide open three....swish...!

Sorry, I can't get over this, as I'm a big basketball fan going back years + the political angle.

I think I'm done now.

Sooooo, how bout that Herman Cain and his 9-9-9 deal.  I'm hungry.

I love y'all with the passion of a thousand burning suns... however, I started drinking on the last thread and I think it's time for me to say goodnight.

'ettes, thank you so much for the validation. I'll send the pic soon. Robert, awesome links. Gracias!

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at September 16, 2011 11:39 PM (ZDUD4)I

i know a story about an officer in a chowhall in Iraq who had his hangin outta his flight suit. A Gunny tried to call him over to a secluded place to tell him to fix it. He would not come over.

He got belligerant that an enlisted was trying to tell him what to do. Why wouldnt they come over to him?

So, they just let him walk around, swinging in the breeze...nobody had anything further to say to him. Everyone saw.

I love y'all with the passion of a thousand burning suns... however, I started drinking on the last thread and I think it's time for me to say goodnight.

'ettes, thank you so much for the validation. I'll send the pic soon. Robert, awesome links. Gracias!

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 11:44 PM (otfJ1)

night ima!

>>>>>Btw war, who plays "Bug Eyed" Bachmann in the Nailin Palyn sequel?

That depends.  I injected a bunch of crack whores out here behind the Circle K with Official Merck Retard Vaccine and we'll see which of them reaches the maximum IQ requirement in time for the beginning of shooting.

>>>>>and are you pro/anti dividing PA's electoral votes?

I'm pro-apportioning EVERY state's electoral votes by district and have been since the 2000 clusterfuck.  But then I am also pro-appointing-myself-benevolent-dictator-of-America so that we can dispense with this election nonsense altogether.

I've got a nice buzz going on..is that a bad thing?

Horseshit. 

Posted by: The War Between the Undead States at September 16, 2011 11:39 PM (KxADM)

talk about horseshit..... my boss had this great idea that i should be at work at 8 am EST in the morning.......... wait, thats his name on my paycheck....... night ya'll.........

Posted by: Ima Wurdibitsch at September 16, 2011 11:44 PM (otfJ1)

Anytime, and good night!

ok...now reading later posts..I guess I'm in the league of morons

ok...now reading later posts..I guess I'm in the league of morons

Posted by: Bosk at September 16, 2011 11:48 PM (AFcK1)

welcome to the night shift!

"welcome to the night shift!" Oh I've been here for years. I just usually read at work and sometimes post. I know you all like the crazy aunt or uncle that you try not to catch the eye of.

Posted by: Peaches at September 16, 2011 11:49 PM (/ybwc)

I don't doubt it - retail grocery is a very small margin business

Posted by: As If! at September 16, 2011 11:45 PM (piMMO)

That needs one of those smartass sign responses by drawing "Don't insert your penis" drawing as well.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at September 16, 2011 11:48 PM (ZDUD4)

actually I don't think the Marxists changed the Senate rules, much to the consternation of their ultra-Marxist base

Posted by: Jeff Lebowski at September 16, 2011 11:51 PM (KxADM)

No.  Fuckin' Ralph's has announced that they will shut themselves down!  It's not like we don't have Gelson's, Bristol Farms, Whole Foods, Trader Joes, Target, Walmart, Smart & Final and a billion little bodegas we can shop at.  Very fuckin' weird, if you ask me.  They're bringing in temp help this weekend to empty out their stores. 

And, in case you have not been following this absurd story, it's because the grocery losers don't want to pony up an extra 9 bucks a week for their health insurance. 

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 10:46 PM (s7mIC)

A word of advice -- that's why there's industrial-strength. Don't screw around.

Chimney cap? Don't use the fireplace until you get one -- just close the damper and stick a postit on the front saying "don't light without chimney cap."

Weeds in the cracks of the concrete? http://www.flameengineering.com/Weed_Dragon.html

Cleaning gutters? If you're doing it twice, you're doing it wrong -- get screens.

Go nuclear on the problems, and they'll be afraid to re-occur.

But then I am also pro-appointing-myself-benevolent-dictator-of-America so that we can dispense with this election nonsense altogether.

I'd love to see what a WarUndeadStates/ Buddy Roemer Juggernaut could do for this country.

Sign me up.

I'm curious though...is their room for Bobby Jindal in your Dictatorship?

Actually, I'd like to be appointed as ambassador to Latvia......cool?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:57 PM (s7mIC)

i thought pantsless friday was everyday?

The problem with this apportionment strategy, is it isn't done nationally, it's done individually by certain states, who's political leaders view it as an advantage nationally.  (mostly by democrats recently, but now in PA).

Does going commando count as pantsless?

I'd love to see what a WarUndeadStates/ Buddy Roemer Juggernaut could do for this country.

Sign me up.

I'm curious though...is their room for Bobby Jindal in your Dictatorship?

Actually, I'd like to be appointed as ambassador to Latvia......cool?

Posted by: Delta Smelt at September 16, 2011 11:56 PM (dWPyO)

I shudder.

War would simply nuke Pennsylvania just so he can be perpetually right that it is unwinnable. I mean, nobody "wins" if there is no state, right?

While he is at it I hope he nukes Delaware too. It's stubborn existance makes a mockery of real states. States that are more than a toll road between Maryland and New Jersey.

There is nothing slow motion about Michelle Bachmann's trainwreck.

Though you could leave out the -motion and trainwreck and it would be just as applicable to Nutty Nanny Nanookette of the North.

Does going commando count as pantsless?

Posted by: Bosk at September 17, 2011 12:00 AM (AFcK1)

You bet it does!

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at September 16, 2011 11:57 PM (ZDUD4)

we need to make all laws and rules apply equally to everyone and be literally interpreted, not creatively. full stop.

most important is that all laws apply equally and that means for all lawmakers and staffers and their families too.

I'm pro-apportioning EVERY state's electoral votes by district and have been since the 2000 clusterfuck. But then I am also pro-appointing-myself-benevolent-dictator-of-America so that we can dispense with this election nonsense altogether.

Posted by: The War Between the Undead Sexes at September 16, 2011 11:47 PM (KxADM)

Emperor AmishDude.

"Embezzelment for a better tomorrow!"

Posted by: Johnny (John E.) at September 16, 2011 11:59 PM (nRTou)

I'm offended for those who are forced to watch me...you have no choice.

i thought pantsless friday was everyday?

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 16, 2011 11:59 PM (QNeKQ)

in the frat house, it is

now where's that sammich?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 16, 2011 11:57 PM (s7mIC)

Make me ambassador to Hungary.

They worship mathematicians and their women are hotttttttttt!!!

"Embezzelment for a better tomorrow!"

Posted by: AmishDude at September 17, 2011 12:03 AM (73tyQ)

it will be embezzlement, but it will be accounted for to the very last penny

i thought pantsless friday was everyday?

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 16, 2011 11:59 PM (QNeKQ)

in the frat house, it is

now where's that sammich?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:04 AM (s7mIC)

i ate it.

it will be embezzlement, but it will be accounted for to the very last penny

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:06 AM (s7mIC)

I can live with that, 'jeff.

Posted by: Johnny (John E.) at September 17, 2011 12:07 AM (nRTou)

But is he supposed to be funny?

I just figured Jason Statham is always in mortal danger.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 12:07 AM (QNeKQ)

lol you win

now where's that sammich?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:04 AM (s7mIC)

i ate it.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 12:07 AM (QNeKQ)

_{golf clap!!}

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 12:07 AM (QNeKQ)

lol you win

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:08 AM (s7mIC)

thank you

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at September 17, 2011 12:07 AM (tKFT6)

I found out later that sluttishness was much more prevalent than I was aware of. I should have gone to my 20th year reunion and rented a room with a king bed and cheap room service.

Fuckin' job-seekers.

now where's that sammich?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:04 AM (s7mIC)

i ate it.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 12:07 AM (QNeKQ)

_{golf clap!!}

Posted by: Peaches at the Rod & Gun Club at September 17, 2011 12:09 AM (/ybwc)

But i DID!

If you remember in the last thread all that sammitch talk made me hungry and i made Aurochs take me to get one for dinner. I wasnt even being a smartass ^(much)

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:14 AM (s7mIC)

Fuckit.  I'll go for #5 if you will go for #8.  Deal? 

Deal!

 Luckily for Statham most of his movie roles do not require him to do a lot of talking, unless he's shouting or being funny.  Usually its just him beating up a bunch of people and driving a car fast.

Posted by: As If! at September 17, 2011 12:14 AM (piMMO)

Yeah, there are rules for sluttishness.

You just call 911 and report them for prostitution.

He arrived at his room some time later and found her...and another guy...doing it in his bed.

Posted by: As If! at September 17, 2011 12:14 AM (piMMO)

I bet that was not what he had in mind when he agreed to give her his key.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:14 AM (s7mIC)

Stop at eight?  Stop when the sun rises and you can't remember what happened between now and then.

Fuckin' job-seekers.

Nice.

On that theme....

I ain't picky.  I love the Latvian babes, but would settle for Chile, Brazil, Israel, Russia...hell even Poland.......hook me up brah....

We are a frat house here ya know.....

Fuckit.  I'll go for #5 if you will go for #8.  Deal? 

Deal!

Posted by: Peaches at September 17, 2011 12:15 AM (/ybwc)

I've gone from Russian Imperial Stout to vodka.

I must have a thing for my married Russian colleague.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at September 17, 2011 12:16 AM (c0A3e)

Crank was the SHIT!  It was awesome.  You can get it so cheap on DVD.  It's one of those action movies like Taken that you can't go without.  It's 100 minutes of tough guy assholes beating the shit out of each other.  It's great, highly recommended.

^{(The sequel kinda sucked though.)}

Posted by: As If! at September 17, 2011 12:18 AM (piMMO)

Couldn't fire her either.

"She was fucking a guy in my hotel bed"

"How did she get into your room?"

"I gave her my key"

"Why?"

"I thought she wanted to fuck me!"

"We welcome everyone to today's sexual harrassment seminar...."

I'm not watching Leno, but crazy broads (like Bachmann) generally don't do humor well.  Especially attention whorish, excessively ambitious broads.

Not funny.

Posted by: As If! at September 17, 2011 12:14 AM (piMMO)

If you can't love the one you want...

"I thought she wanted to fuck me!"

"We welcome everyone to today's sexual harrassment seminar...."

That's why you have to destroy them one bit at a time, until they wish they were dead.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:01 AM (s7mIC)

I forget, do you have a one-story or two-story money pit? If it's a one-story, this is an extremely trivial thing to do. If two-story, it's an insanely-dangerous, extremely trivial thing to do.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at September 17, 2011 12:22 AM (ZDUD4)

Moderately libtarded.  Libautistic.  Libasperbery.

Mmmmmm, bergers!

Posted by: NY Betsy Rose at September 17, 2011 12:25 AM (a/wJb)

Be as underhanded and as deceitful as you feel comfortable.

And rest assured, there are some of us who think a law degree is an indication of mental retardation.

Posted by: NY Betsy Rose at September 17, 2011 12:25 AM (a/wJb)

glad you are here

there are more conservatives than you realize,even in NY

keep the faith

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at September 17, 2011 12:15 AM (tKFT6)

well if you are not stupid, and want to keep him you dont... i do NOT GET some women...

pretty much if you love someone and dont want him to look elsewhere you find out what he likes to eat, how he likes to fuck and you make sure he gets plenty of it.

OTOH...

Guys who dont get what they want might want to look into whats goin on with girlie.

i know someone who spent more time with his dog, his friends and at work, than with his wife... for some reason she didnt do much for him either after a while... and she started off crazy about him.... which was sad. She just got discouraged. So the road runs both ways i guess.

but i find guys to be pretty accommodating if they get lots of BJs steak and strange...

Posted by: DRUDGE SIREN!!! at September 17, 2011 12:27 AM (WCm02)

like my ex should?

or something else? as WHAT?

Posted by: The Dude at September 17, 2011 12:31 AM (M8yfa)

Would you like me to translate?

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:30 AM (s7mIC)

Huelga los enanos.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:33 AM (s7mIC)

hmmm.

how did you meet her? if its a dating site, which one?

this makes a difference

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:33 AM (s7mIC)

When you have a good sense that they aren't ax wielding maniacs.  Or profess their love for heavy metal, in which case you should make wedding plans right away.

If you want you can give them my phone number so I can vett them for you.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:27 AM (s7mIC)

Seriously, all you need is someone completely unconcerned about their safety to run up there and measure the hole, then order the thing on the internet, wait a few weeks, and have the same oblivious person run up and cram it onto the top of the chimney.....what's the difficulty with that? Hey, you don't have an abnormal fear of heights, do you?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at September 17, 2011 12:37 AM (JdI+R)

being stalked by a fatty is fun though :s

Posted by: Johnny (John E.) at September 17, 2011 12:39 AM (nRTou)

will that number work for texting too?

Posted by: cthulhu at September 17, 2011 12:38 AM (kaalw)

I'd be crazy enough to do that for cj, if I lived near him. 

Posted by: booger at September 17, 2011 12:39 AM (9RFH1)

other than both feature a wheelman, those flicks have nothing in common. And Drive is an awesome flick btw

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:33 AM (s7mIC)

I mean this in the most sincere way, with no offense to the wonderful women we have here at AOS..... but...

Never ask females for dating advice.  I could write 20 paragraphs on this topic, but I won't.  Just don't do it. 

Bottom line, women will never admit what really attracts them to men, and almost all of their advice is counter productive.  You would be better off going "Costanza" and doing the exact opposite of what they tell you.  Really it ain't good for the most part.

Posted by: kbdabear at September 17, 2011 12:39 AM (Y+DPZ)

awsum

Posted by: cthulhu at September 17, 2011 12:38 AM (kaalw)

I'd be crazy enough to do that for cj, if I lived near him. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at September 17, 2011 12:41 AM (c0A3e)

See, CJ -- there's always somebody.

Posted by: Delta Smelt at September 17, 2011 12:42 AM (RzIGM)

I concur.  

Surefire way to win a woman?  Conquer Poland.

Bitches be all over you then.

Posted by: Papa Editor at September 17, 2011 12:49 AM (FZZ94)

does it matter? you know damn well he is going to bust his nut as soon as he touches a thigh

Posted by: sifty all up in yo mix at September 17, 2011 12:49 AM (4CSeG)

Aww, that's good to hear! 

Surefire way to win a woman? 

As for women not telling the truth: I don't believe that.

I know.  Women don't know when they are bullshitting themselves.  ;-)

 There won't always be someone around to tell you the appropriate thing to do, so you'd better find someone who likes you in spite of what you do when your buds aren't around to guide you.

If you understand females, in the broadest sense, you won't need your buddies around, giving you advice.

Look, like men, women have very reliable attraction buttons.  They just are a bit different than tits n ass....aka looks.....but reliable all the same.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:47 AM (s7mIC)

IF she seems to like you, three is fine.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:50 AM (s7mIC)

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 12:51 AM (QNeKQ)

yeah I learned that where we meet it will be in public, like a starbucks or something

Posted by: Papa Editor at September 17, 2011 12:53 AM (FZZ94)

might take a minute, he's looking for new batteries for his fleshlight

Posted by: Euro Porn Industry at September 17, 2011 12:52 AM (Y+DPZ)

Teach me your ways, master.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at September 17, 2011 12:48 AM (JdI+R)

Latest trip, it was Kew Gardens. I managed to circumnavigate the walkways of the glasshouses, but did you know they've got this?

after how many emails is it appropriate to give out the number?
2? 3?

Cmon man.

Who gives a shit.

And yeah, who gives a shit is the right answer.  Not being a dick.  Who cares about her.  That's your answer.  She will love you for it.  Babes hate hand wringers.

Get it?

Iow, don't give a shit.  You are worried about the micro when you need to work and improve the macro.  Seriously. 

Posted by: sifty all up in yo mix at September 17, 2011 12:56 AM (4CSeG)

With "free candy" written across the side.

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:50 AM (s7mIC)

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:54 AM (s7mIC)

Posted by: chemjeff at September 17, 2011 12:58 AM (s7mIC)

rather play games than stick my dick into a vibrator

Surefire way to win a woman? 

Posted by: Euro Porn Industry at September 17, 2011 12:52 AM (Y+DPZ)

Kbdabear you almost owed me a new keyboard....(note to self: AOSHQ and water is dangerous)

Posted by: sifty all up in yo mix at September 17, 2011 12:56 AM (4CSeG)

Greatest pickup line ever: Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at September 17, 2011 12:58 AM (JdI+R)

I was looking up at it from the ground, admiring the mesh flooring for it, and thinking -- you fucking pommy bastards, the only reason I'd go up on such a crazy thing would be to toss its designer over the rail....after which I could crawl to the exit with my eyes closed and make my escape.

Posted by: sifty all up in yo mix at September 17, 2011 01:02 AM (4CSeG)

The old days, when creepy old guys could show you photos of them skinny dipping.

goodnight cj.  Thanks for ruining another ONT.

Cmon, now.  CJ is out in the cold, fighting for a piece....you are sitting in your warm, cozy house, with your wonderful wife, content.  Let's give some leeway to the hungry single guy, a bit confused, just looking for some nourishment. 

 Don't make her pump you for information.

Seriously War?  I think this is what CJ needs. 

Cmon, now.  CJ is out in the cold, fighting for a piece....you are sitting in your warm, cozy house, with your wonderful wife, content.  Let's give some leeway to the hungry single guy, a bit confused, just looking for some nourishment. 

Posted by: Delta Smelt at September 17, 2011 01:07 AM (JZpkc)

You're right, I don't know what came over me.  I should have manned up and given him some great advice on how I won over my wonder wife...

Oh wait, I've done that a HUNDRED FUCKING TIMES!!!!

Seriously War?  I think this is what CJ needs.

Look, all I'm saying is that even if things go bad they can be patched back up.

Posted by: MissTammy at September 17, 2011 01:09 AM (SsG4J)

i try never to think about those things, like "what i want." It will limit you from discovering new things you could want but dont know about or havent considered much.

i do think about what are dealbreakers and stay the hell away from these things.

Also if i get a bad gut feeling i listen. every time i havent i got hurt. usually if you think something might be wrong, it is.

Best advice i ever got in Dating... "Kick the tires. When you think its all cool... kick em again. "

Posted by: Bunny, the terrorist, plus added bonus, Barbarian at September 17, 2011 01:12 AM (TN7KL)

Oh Baby, sweet Baby... what am I gonna do with you?

Best advice i ever got in Dating... "Kick the tires. When you think its all cool... kick em again. "

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 01:14 AM (QNeKQ)

you can't do that though, kicking tends to leave bruises on a girl and that usually means you end up on some register

_{Posted by: Joffen at September 17, 2011 01:17 AM (m8vQY)}

TL;DR

It's sexy party time.

Oh wait, I've done that a HUNDRED FUCKING TIMES!!!!

Yeah, but the 1st time is always the hardest....

Look, all I'm saying is that even if things go bad they can be patched back up.

Shit.  I only have come backs that would be inappropriate for even this irreverent place.  Well. whatever.  Damn.

Best advice i ever got in Dating... "Kick the tires. When you think its all cool... kick em again. "

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 01:14 AM (QNeKQ)

you can't do that though, kicking tends to leave bruises on a girl and that usually means you end up on some register

Posted by: The Dude at September 17, 2011 01:16 AM (M8yfa)

I used to wear these ugly fuckin engineer boots with steel toes. This friend of mine a squid who thought he was badass cuz really he kinda was, was bein an ass, i told him to knock it off or I'd kick him in the shins...

"You WOULDNT DARE"

I did kick his shins black and blue. I think his GF said one was bloody.

Everyone stood there and laughed he was mad but he did dare me, and i did warn him... so sometimes it works out. He didnt hit me or call the cops.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 01:20 AM (QNeKQ)

bruises are fun but then again, I LOVE hot wax, paddles and high heels meeting me in the nuts

Posted by: sifty all up in yo mix at September 17, 2011 01:21 AM (4CSeG)

when desperate, only thing a man should ever do is the 3 Fs. Desperation breeds shitty experiences outside of a quicky

Posted by: Joffen at September 17, 2011 01:17 AM (m8vQY)

I seen some polls said most seniors aren't frightened no matter what Mittens says they should feel.

That being said...beer, boobehs and metal.

This ONT requires one of these.

Oh and dudes, never listen to women who sound like men....

Women who say they are dating around, testing the market....playing the field...whatever....

Women who say this are putting on a brave front.  They are crying on the inside.  Don't fall for that independent jazz.  Even the most hardened corporate/lawyer aggressive babe wants a man she can look up to, love and all that (I don't recommend the high testosterone babe, but even they have feelings).

Whatever you do...consult human nature....and remember the difference between male and female nature.......just like you would do with politics.

Posted by: Chris Matthews at September 17, 2011 01:24 AM (Y+DPZ)

the gas stations around here still have the poles that hung the payphones

I don't want to come across as creepy, but I do want to come across as interested.

Not a moronette, but here's my two cents:  Arrange to meet somewhere public first.  I'm thing lunch or something similar in a public venue.  If things go well, you can swap phone numbers. 

Oh and dudes, never listen to women who sound like men....

Women who say they are dating around, testing the market....playing the field...whatever....

_{Women who say this are putting on a brave front.  They are crying on the inside.  Don't fall for that independent jazz.  Even the most hardened corporate/lawyer aggressive babe wants a man she can look up to, love and all that (I don't recommend the high testosterone babe, but even they have feelings).}

_{Whatever you do...consult human nature....and remember the difference between male and female nature.......just like you would do with politics.}

If that doesn't work, try the Shocker!

yo, did anyone try out windows8 yet?

i'm about to give it a shot and i'm wondering about IE10

yo, did anyone try out windows8 yet?

i'm about to give it a shot and i'm wondering about IE10

Posted by: navycopjoe aka Palinista Extremo at September 17, 2011 01:31 AM (R7NIt)

Whatever you do, don't give it your phone number after only 2 or 3 emails. 

yo, did anyone try out windows8 yet?

Posted by: navycopjoe aka Palinista Extremo at September 17, 2011 01:31 AM (R7NIt)

huh? is there a beta out or something? I just hope they go full hog on integrating the Kinect into Windows

Posted by: sifty all up in yo mix at September 17, 2011 01:17 AM (4CSeG)

sifty i am a regular Winston Wolf for all kinds of shit but its weird... my advice seems to be good only after 10:30 pm when the horse is down and in a full spasm.

everyone calls me at 9:30 am when the problem starts, but they never take the 9:30 advice. They wait all day, let the problem get worse, and then call back at 10:30 asking what was that again? then i have to break it to them the 10:30 advice is harder and more expensive.

I know thats just sick horses im talking about but it carries over into all kinds of things. I asked someone once why nobody listens to me.  "Because you look like you're Twelve!" She blurted.

sigh. im not sure thats it. But i do know this... im hard to relate to for some girls. Older women i can do fine with.

Aurochs says its because im more like talkin to a not prissy gay man who happens to have a vagina, than a real woman. Please dont tell Grim. The implications would really bother him. But it would explain how i ended up married to a man who liked men for 14 years.

Posted by: sifty says f*ck yo couch at September 17, 2011 01:28 AM (4CSeG)

Weak.

I want my shit in the tiniest of font, or big bold font.  Cmon now.

606  heh, so true

609  not a full beta but i think they unlocked the developers page for it this time

i have a technet account so i log in and get it, the msdn guys get the best stuff first of course but that is crazy expensive

Debbie, I think washing your nasty-ass caked up bukkake hair would go a long way toward fixing your looks.

Alpha!

Posted by: Bunny, the terrorist, plus added bonus, Barbarian at September 17, 2011 01:31 AM (TN7KL)

oh god. Maybe i am a gay man with a 'gina then... because Bunny thats just not me. And if ALL women are like that, then im a man who is penis challenged.

609  not a full beta but i think they unlocked the developers page for it this time

i have a technet account so i log in and get it, the msdn guys get the best stuff first of course but that is crazy expensive

Posted by: navycopjoe aka Palinista Extremo at September 17, 2011 01:37 AM (R7NIt)

lucky bastard. When they ask for feedback, write nothing except for the hope of Kinect integration

hey gushka, when you come here, pls don't kick me or i'll have my 'i'm almost ten...i'm an adult' girl soccor kick you in the ass

622  hmmm, let me find the link if you want to try it

You rush a miracle man you get rotten miracles

Hardly.  I got my wish.  My last comment you highlighted was in tiny font.  Thanks. Dreams do come true here at AOS.

oh god. Maybe i am a gay man with a 'gina then... because Bunny thats just not me. And if ALL women are like that, then im a man who is penis challenged.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 01:39 AM (QNeKQ)

Women are wired as many different ways as men. I think we men get judged a little less for being different from each other.

Men don't put up with other men making rules for how they dress or act. At least straight men don't.

Get a fuckin' hooker!

Pay top dollar.

You want a Companion?

Get a fuckin' dog.

No charge.

If this offends....

Tough shit, life's a bitch cupcake. Deal with it.

Posted by: sifty says f*ck yo couch at September 17, 2011 01:35 AM (4CSeG)

ok admission Sifty when i first met Grim i thought he looked like he was made of spare parts. I was NOT attracted to him, tho i did think he was healthy and fit. it was not ill later that i realized this didnt matter and wanted him to touch me.

Only weeks later i decided he was beautiful and i wanted to fuck him. So i quietly asked his ex GF is he sufficient? cuz if hes not i dont want to embearass him by revealing some tragic insufficiency somewhere...

IYKWIMAITYD

_{Get a fuckin' hooker!}

_{Pay top dollar.}

_{You want a Companion?}

_{Get a fuckin' dog.}

_{No charge.}

_{If this offends....}

_{Tough shit, life's a bitch cupcake. Deal with it.}

Now that there is good advice. That there is John Wayne level stuff.

Posted by: sifty says f*ck yo couch at September 17, 2011 01:43 AM (4CSeG)

dEVOLution!!!

Men don't put up with other men making rules for how they dress or act. At least straight men don't.

Posted by: sifty says f*ck yo couch at September 17, 2011 01:42 AM (4CSeG)

Do you think i sound like the kind of person who puts up with it either?

oh no. poor Grim. I am a man.... possibly not even a gay one....

Posted by: Japanese Sex Robot Industry at September 17, 2011 01:45 AM (Y+DPZ)

Ninja please!

here it is, dev of windows 8

disclaimer for all:  do not use this on your primary computer or at the very least, start a seperate partition to try it!  you easily can lose all your info!!!!

http://tinyurl.com/64spdr4

IYKWIMAITYD

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 01:45 AM (QNeKQ)

No, please explain further using detailed imagery and possibly a pair of dolls.

hey gushka, when you come here, pls don't kick me or i'll have my 'i'm almost ten...i'm an adult' girl soccor kick you in the ass

Posted by: navycopjoe aka Palinista Extremo at September 17, 2011 01:41 AM (R7NIt)

Seriously Joe, something tells me you'd be smarter than to look me in the eye and DARE me to.

@635 Sifty

Thanks Champ.

Guess what?

You're gonna do just fine up there in Idaho. Sounds like you lucked into a one in a million spouse type. You no doubt protect your son like a honey badger with a grudge and flaming hemmorhoids. You're a take no shit type, with a a realism bent.

Find a lake, drop a line and keep on keepin' on.

You got my respect, and that and a buck fifty will get you a cup of joe.

650  will get you a cup of joe.

a full cup?!!!!!!

damn, better get started then.....

fap fap fap fap fap

No, please explain further using detailed imagery and possibly a pair of dolls.

Posted by: Robert at September 17, 2011 01:47 AM (4q6A5)

Seriously? ok. here we go.

Gushka being pragmatic 101:

if  Single Gushka likes a guy, and want to ask him to spend the night, ask his ex GF if they (and you) are on good terms, and find out what goes on with him. (she is very glad to no longer be single)

that way if he doesnt know his way around the bed, or hes got a tiny winky, you dont embearass him.  And you can decide in advance what to do about it.

I do know someone who got in bed with someone and discovered an insufficiency so TRAGIC she suddenly discovered she had to wash her hair RIGHT THEN, jumped up and went home.

I never want to be that person.

I have heard BTW that Manson from Marilyn Manson has that problem continually, and that this does contribute to his problem is keeping hot women.

653  I always ended up dating dark haired, blue eyed, left handed Catholic baseball players, for some reason.

whoohoo!!!!

how you doing?

_{Guess what?}

_{You're gonna do just fine up there in Idaho. Sounds like you lucked into a one in a million spouse type. You no doubt protect your son like a honey badger with a grudge and flaming hemmorhoids. You're a take no shit type, with a a realism bent.}

Thanks Pal. I can't wait to get up there and breathe some free air.

All this concrete is killing me like a monkey in a cage.

Posted by: Robert at September 17, 2011 02:05 AM (4q6A5)

a few times. the wallet is attractive but i have heard sleeping with him is as satisfying as sitting on a toilet seat.

yo, did anyone try out windows8 yet?

i'm about to give it a shot and i'm wondering about IE10

Posted by: navycopjoe aka Palinista Extremo at September 17, 2011 01:31 AM (R7NIt)

You've got to be out of your fuckin' mind.

"Early adopter" of anything is another name for "sucker" -- and with Microsmurf, particularly, you get ripped.

They've got two development teams working on their operating systems -- one whose motto is "no guts, no glory", and the other whose motto is, "no glory, no bloody innards hanging around the cubicles....." The thing is, each can steal from the other, but they do their releases alternately.

Win XP -- same guys that did Win98 and Win7; Win Vista -- same guys that did WinME and are now releasing Win8. Any questions?

@ ncj

Button it sailor boy.

Just kidding. Doing your twenty with Uncle Sam, and still having an attitude gets you a well done. I'll bet that young whippersnapper daughter gets her killer survival instinct from her old man. You traded one mission for another.

Of course, being a democrat and rooting for the Cubs and Bears, probably made you hard hearted and that's as close to real as it gets.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 02:08 AM (QNeKQ)

I dunno, I've seen some toilet seats I'd like to sit on for a while.

What were we talking about again?

Did I already mention I had hot sauce?

Subject: Gushka seems like a female lead character in a Heinlein novel.

Discuss.

That depends.  What's her stance on orgies?

Posted by: Robert at September 17, 2011 02:05 AM (4q6A5)

I always ask around about a prospect. especially: what did you hate most about him???

and other stuff. take it all with a grain of salt. but forewarned is forearmed. if the breakup was psycho i know they are not grown ups and STAY AWAY. People who talk shit about a person without concrete reasons for resentment might talk that way about you later. People with a string of civilized relationships are generally folks who fight fair, and worth taking a chance on.

I dont like complete "strangers" and all their surprises. 

that part of dating sucked. i dont drink on a date, I never ever sleep with people i dont know well. Yes i have trust issues. why do you ask?

Grim and this chick were like family. She was so happy we liked each other, she was perfectly honest about the good, the bad the ugly and the awesome. oh She and her mom were the one who set us up.

every once in a while in the beginning hed fuck up with me, and shed call him up and bawl him out and then play master of the obvious so i never had to... it was odd. We just talk. very strange after an abusive marriage.

Posted by: GnuBreed at September 17, 2011 02:24 AM (ENKCw)

i was friends with Phillip K Dick's 5th wife. strange but true.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 02:25 AM (QNeKQ)

Mmmmm hhmmmmm

Megadeth - 1000 Times Goodbye

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at September 17, 2011 02:28 AM (bxiXv)

In Arab countries it's "maybe someday you'll find the right goat."

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 02:25 AM (QNeKQ)

Only if he's trying to get in your pants.  Otherwise, depending on who, it's a very big honor... if it's true.  If you're blowing smoke then not so much. 

Only if he's trying to get in your pants.  Otherwise, depending on who, it's a very big honor... if it's true.  If you're blowing smoke then not so much. 

Posted by: Papa Editor at September 17, 2011 02:32 AM (FZZ94)

agreed. this guy  was asking her to marry him. creepily enough they lived together. you know, with one bed.

Posted by: Gushka goes blue at September 17, 2011 02:35 AM (QNeKQ)

Anal doesn't count.

Goooooodnight everybody!

Posted by: Robert at September 17, 2011 02:37 AM (4q6A5)

FIFY

Posted by: GnuBreed at September 17, 2011 02:48 AM (ENKCw)

then you may have guessed that i am relentlessly ethical but care little for other peoples standard morality. Mercy, Dignity, and Truth are my guiding principals.

and i really really dont care much for what other people think. I tend to be pragmatic. Maybe i read too much Heinlein and Niven and William Gibson in my formative years. Mentioned the other night i named a filly Molly Millions.

right now im bummed tho. one of my feral kittens, the most tame of the bunch has disappeared. im hoping he shows back up and was just out chasing some pussy.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at September 17, 2011 02:55 AM (bxiXv)

i disagree. you just described Islam and the Holy Roman Empire.