Ace of Spades HQ

September 26, 2011

The Fed Is Preparing Its Own AttackWatch
— rdbrewer

Two weeks ago, the media's heart went aflutter when it learned that the president had borrowed a page right out of ole' Joe McCarthy's communist witch hunt book with the launch of Attack Watch. The response by everyone, even fans of Obama, was immediate and brutal. . . . [The Federal Reserve,] in a Request for Proposals filed to companies that are Fed vendors, is requesting the creation of a "Social Listening Platform" whose function is to "gather data from various social media outlets and news sources." It will "monitor billions of conversations and generate text analytics based on predefined criteria." The Fed's desired product should be able to "determine the sentiment . . . of a speaker or writer with respect to some topic or document"... "The solution must be able to gather data from the primary social media platforms Â– Facebook, Twitter, Blogs, Forums and YouTube. It should also be able to aggregate data from various media outlets such as: CNN, WSJ, Factiva etc." Most importantly, the "Listening Platform" should be able to "Handle crisis situations, Continuously monitor conversations, and Identify and reach out to key bloggers and influencers." Said otherwise, the Fed has just entered the counterespionage era and will be monitoring everything written about it anywhere in the world.

Is this the best use of our tax dollars? How, exactly, does monitoring everything everyone says about the Federal Reserve benefit the taxpayer? I understand they're trying to gauge consumer sentiment, but reaching out to key bloggers and influencers? Why? I don't think propaganda is within the Fed's purview. Just make your measured statements, twiddle your monetary knobs and go away.

Follow me on Twitter. The dirty little secret is, of course, the Fed has already been reaching out to key bloggers and influencers:

Dear Ace:
We at the Federal Reserve have seen the things you have been saying about Mr. Ben Bernanke. While we think your blog is just great, we feel that your statements are unfair in that they cast Mr. Bernanke in a negative light. You should be aware that your statements could have a negative impact on the effect of the Federal Reserve's actions.
When you say that Mr. Bernanke is a dirty little amphibian who is too stupid to be experimenting on the economy and too spineless to stand up to the White House, people might start doubting whether Mr. Bernanke is trying to do what is best for the country. This could damage the efforts of the Federal Reserve.
We think it would be better if you would say that Mr. Bernanke is a good-looking and intelligent man who should be praised, and that his actions are well-crafted to help America though the current crisis.
Also, please note that Mr. Bernanke is taller than he appears on TV and that women are crazy about him. Men admire him and want to be like him.
Other facts are that Mr. Bernanke is a scratch golfer. He bench presses 250 pounds. He is a cigar aficianado, a wine connoisseur, and he prefers painting in the style of the late impressionists. And he once caught a marlin with his bare hands.
We know you care about America as much as we do, and that you will see to it that America knows Mr. Bernanke has a huge penis and that he has America's best interests at heart at all times.
Sincerely,
Ben Bernanke

Posted by: rdbrewer at 10:05 AM | Comments (80)
Post contains 583 words, total size 4 kb.

1 Haha...Ben Bernanke should make an Old Spice commercial.

Posted by: EC at September 26, 2011 09:46 AM (GQ8sn)

2 well, they told me that if I voted for John McCain, it would look like 1984 in this country in less than 3 years.

Posted by: wiserbud at September 26, 2011 09:46 AM (3Okgs)

3 Hope they don't have a SWAT team too...

Posted by: Brock O'bama at September 26, 2011 09:47 AM (6lGsn)

I and the anonymous internet legions of Liberty-Loving American Patriots are prepared for the Federal Reserve's Owellian Crackdown!

I'm routing my IP address through Canada to avoid the baleful eye of Big Government's Cyber-Fascists!

End the Fed!

RAWN PAWL!!!1!

Posted by: The Guy Who Brings Up RAWN PAWL!!!1! at September 26, 2011 09:47 AM (Vy1lZ)

I'm pretty sure that Zero Hedge is misinterpreting this.

A lot of people have been using social media to predict market movements by gauging public sentiment, rather successfully too. The Fed probably wants to get in on that. One of their biggest problems is making decisions in the absence of timely data.

Of course, if you want to freak out about the Godlman Schs Gestapo, don't let me stop you.

Posted by: Mastiff at September 26, 2011 09:49 AM (60y5v)

6 Yeah, Mastiff, but reaching out to key bloggers and influencers?

Posted by: rdbrewer at September 26, 2011 09:50 AM (ry71S)

7 You're building a rat ship here, a vessel of sea going snitches!

... and Bernanke, Geithner, wherever you are out there ....

FUCK YOU TOO !!!

Posted by: Lt Col Frank Slade at September 26, 2011 09:51 AM (Y+DPZ)

8 I could see them wanting gauge reaction to their statements and moves, but trying to fiddle with public opinion? Bureaucrats like this don't need to be doing that.

Posted by: rdbrewer at September 26, 2011 09:52 AM (ry71S)

9 Yeah, Mastiff, but reaching out to key bloggers and influencers?

Posted by: rdbrewer

Agreed. This makes it message control, not merely information gathering.

Posted by: Blue Hen at September 26, 2011 09:52 AM (6rX0K)

10 They can call it whatever they want to. ....It's still creepy. ...Creepy control freak tactics.

Posted by: ConservativeMenAreJustHotter at September 26, 2011 09:56 AM (iCeCI)

11 How dare you quote ZeroHedge those guys are Ron Paul supporting loons. How can you take anything they say seriously? I am disappointed in you.

Posted by: joe at September 26, 2011 09:57 AM (Anl+W)

12 Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Posted by: Darrell Issa at September 26, 2011 09:57 AM (EL+OC)

13 So when I post "Bernanke is also a stuttering clusterf**k of a miserable failure" on my facebook page there is a little counter at the fed that goes ding and increments?

Posted by: Bob Saget at September 26, 2011 09:57 AM (F/4zf)

14 Great post, rd... but Ace just served you with a two minute slapdown. You gonna take that from him...?

Posted by: The Mega Independent at September 26, 2011 09:58 AM (BiNu/)

15 I don't always start bar fights, but when I do, I make sure that punk Ben gets his nose broken, at the very least.

Posted by: The most interesting man in the world at September 26, 2011 09:58 AM (GBXon)

16 Fed can 'spy' on the people, but we can't see their books. Sounds fair.

Posted by: The Schwalbe : © at September 26, 2011 09:58 AM (UU0OF)

17 Mr. Bernanke is a dirty little amphibian

Frogs actually eat bugs and are useful.

Posted by: DaveA at September 26, 2011 09:59 AM (jWTOk)

18 He eyes the gold standard with only skepticism... because using his x-ray vision would melt it. When the yield curve inverts, it does so in his bare hands. Some say he respects the Fed's dual mandate. The truth is he's man enough for more than two. He is the most interesting Fed Chairman in the world.

Posted by: George Orwell what knows Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure at September 26, 2011 09:59 AM (AZGON)

19 Our government drifts closer to the one from Deus Ex, but without the awesome.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at September 26, 2011 10:09 AM (FkKjr)

President O' dumbass just said on the linkedn propoganda polooza that "Warren Buffets secretary shouldn't be paying a Les taxrate than Warren Buffet"

Posted by: robtr at September 26, 2011 10:11 AM (MtwBb)

21 Stay jobless, my friends.

Posted by: The Most Interesting Fed Chairman in the World at September 26, 2011 10:12 AM (NS2Mo)

22 Is this the best use of our tax dollars?

Our? ha ha, good one you little scamp. Its not yours, look at it again. It says Federal Reserve Note. Its a note, a debt, not money. We'll use the debt you owe us any way we want.

Posted by: Teh Bernank and the Fed Reserve Dancers at September 26, 2011 10:12 AM (jiVmv)

23 If this site catches everything out in the blogosphere about the FED, they're gonna need a lot more bandwidth.

Posted by: Milo at September 26, 2011 10:13 AM (1agxt)

24 CAN I BE YOUR FRIEND?...

WAIT... DON'T RUN AWAY...

Posted by: SKYWATCH at September 26, 2011 10:13 AM (D6Uk6)

Hopefully we get another cool video parody about this.

Posted by: Ben at September 26, 2011 10:13 AM (wuv1c)

26 And people think I'm kidding when I say the Russians and E. Europeans I know are eyeballing other countries to flee move to because they say we're becoming the USSA...

Posted by: Ranba Ral at September 26, 2011 10:14 AM (G99e4)

"Also, please note that Mr. Bernanke is taller than he appears on TV "

So what you're saying is we are going to need a stronger rope and a taller tree? Done and done.

Posted by: Go! at September 26, 2011 10:14 AM (U+JW2)

28 I don't always choose to fuck up an economy. But when I do, I fuck up the American economy.

Stay poverty-stricken, my friend.

Posted by: The Most Interesting Federal Reserve Board Chairman In The World at September 26, 2011 10:14 AM (QKKT0)

29 Posted by: The Most Interesting Fed Chairman in the World at September 26, 2011 02:12 PM (NS2Mo)

Bastard

Posted by: The Most Interesting Federal Reserve Board Chairman In The World at September 26, 2011 10:15 AM (QKKT0)

30 #29 Excellent, we have a winner!

Posted by: Milo at September 26, 2011 10:15 AM (1agxt)

31 @21. GOLD!

Posted by: Go! at September 26, 2011 10:16 AM (F3OJ5)

32 Posted by: The Most Interesting Federal Reserve Board Chairman In The World at September 26, 2011 02:15 PM (QKKT0)

Yours was better.

Posted by: grognard at September 26, 2011 10:16 AM (NS2Mo)

33 Want to hear something really frightening?

I also follow several "tin foil" type sites (yes, I am insane) and this has been mentioned there as well. In fact, it was mentioned the day ZH ran the story.

Am I the only one that finds the fact that a "smart military blog" and "the tin foil hat crowd" are reading the same thing disconcerting?

Posted by: shibumi at September 26, 2011 10:17 AM (z63Tr)

34 Quickest way to deal with it is to turn the "End the Fed" chatter up to 11. 12, even.

Posted by: Ken at September 26, 2011 10:17 AM (7yb9x)

35 What makes you think a "smart military blog" isn't pissed at the Fed too? And aluminum is getting expensive!

Posted by: Milo at September 26, 2011 10:18 AM (1agxt)

36 Also, I think we should End the Fed.

/patiently sitting at home, waiting for the men in the black helicopters to come for me....

Posted by: shibumi at September 26, 2011 10:18 AM (z63Tr)

37 Don't they know all they need to do is hit the tip jar generously?

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at September 26, 2011 10:20 AM (f9c2L)

And he once caught a marlin with his bare hands.

Can he lick his own balls too?

Posted by: harleycowboy at September 26, 2011 10:20 AM (wSTfB)

39 These folks at the Fed forget who they work for....

Posted by: The Robot Devil at September 26, 2011 10:20 AM (136wp)

40 And aluminum is getting expensive!

But, Gamera is friend to children!

Posted by: Dr. Hidaka at September 26, 2011 10:21 AM (136wp)

41 3 Hope they don't have a SWAT team too...

Posted by: Brock O'bama at September 26, 2011 01:47 PM (6lGsn)

Go to the Fed's website, click the careers tab. Law Enforcement positions. Super.

Posted by: fozzy at September 26, 2011 10:22 AM (FEzSe)

42 Can he lick his own balls too? Nope, cause if he could he would have never left the house.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at September 26, 2011 10:22 AM (ZDUD4)

43 didn't they pass a type of Fairness doctrine in last couple of weeks?

Posted by: willow at September 26, 2011 10:22 AM (h+qn8)

44 Am I the only one that finds the fact that a "smart military blog" and "the tin foil hat crowd" are reading the same thing disconcerting?

Please note, we have increased the tax on tin foil.

Posted by: CF Obama at September 26, 2011 10:24 AM (jiVmv)

45 44 didn't they pass a type of Fairness doctrine in last couple of weeks?
Posted by: willow

Yes, very quietly last week. Repubs are trying to block it, kill it, stomp it to death.

Posted by: Aunti Entity at September 26, 2011 10:25 AM (FU3yL)

46 Go to the Fed's website, click the careers tab. Law Enforcement positions. Super.

I find this disconcerting and, as a result, will now increase the frequency of storing my excess cash in "millimeters" rather than "dollars."

Posted by: shibumi at September 26, 2011 10:25 AM (z63Tr)

47 This will cause Ron Paul and the Ronulan's head to collectively ass-plode.

Posted by: HondaV65 at September 26, 2011 10:25 AM (8X9tr)

48 Yes, very quietly last week. Repubs are trying to block it, kill it, stomp it to death.
Posted by: Aunti Entity

wish them success.

Posted by: willow at September 26, 2011 10:26 AM (h+qn8)

49 So, will the "FedWatch" website look like we expect it to? Like an html webpage from 1996?

Posted by: George Orwell what knows Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure at September 26, 2011 10:26 AM (AZGON)

50 This will be an epic fail just like AttackWatch. They never learn.

I'll give it a go...Ben Bernake is another SCOAMF and an epic economic d-bag. Come and get me guys. Will you be wearing fedoras?

Posted by: mpfs, TPT at September 26, 2011 10:30 AM (iYbLN)

51 Rush is saying that some people are starting a "Jew Janitors for Cain" group, LOL!

Posted by: PJ at September 26, 2011 10:32 AM (FlVA8)

52 H-E-double hockey sticks, even we can take out planes, nowadays.
NYPD can take down terror planes from skies in Â‘very extremeÂ’ situations, Ray Kelly says
http://tinyurl.com/3e4tf5y

Posted by: NYC Police at September 26, 2011 10:34 AM (136wp)

Do they know google has been providing that service for free for several years.

Posted by: Jimmah at September 26, 2011 10:36 AM (g9KCn)

Do they know google has been providing that service for free for several years.

Never get for free that you can spend hundreds of millions of dollars with a crony of the administration software company...

Posted by: The Robot Devil at September 26, 2011 10:37 AM (136wp)

55 52 Rush is saying that some people are starting a "Jew Janitors for Cain" group, LOL!
Posted by: PJ at September 26, 2011 02:32 PM

Oy, carumba!

Posted by: Julio Goldberg at September 26, 2011 10:38 AM (Y+DPZ)

56 Bill Brasky would laugh at Ben Bernanke. Brasky "poured beer" down Bernanke's back and Bernanke volunteered, "Hey, it's raining!"

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at September 26, 2011 10:38 AM (r4t7/)

57 What they envision: A roomful of minions, watching the Internet, and dropping...'helpful comments' every now an then.

What they'll get: A roomful of people uploading cat macros and downloading immense volumes of internet pr0n.

Your heavily devalued tax dollars at work!

Posted by: DarkLord© sez Obama is a stuttering clusterf--- of a miserable failure
Oh, and F--- Nevada! at September 26, 2011 10:41 AM (GBXon)

58 Ben Bernanke. The most interesting man in the world!

Posted by: NukemHill at September 26, 2011 10:48 AM (7WLzC)

59 the radio host Dennis Miller announced Monday that heÂ’s endorsing Cain for the 2012 Republican presidential nomination.

Miller, who mentioned his support for the Cain campaign on his national radio show, will headline a fundraiser for Cain in Los Angeles and has donated to the campaign, a Cain spokeswoman confirmed.

breitbart

Posted by: willow at September 26, 2011 10:50 AM (h+qn8)

Blog

Intelligence

Gathering -

Basic

Research

Organization

THEmatic

Report

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at September 26, 2011 10:55 AM (ItDg4)

61 Article:
It will "monitor billions of conversations and generate text analytics based on predefined criteria." The Fed's desired product should be able to "determine the sentiment . . . of a speaker or writer with respect to some topic or document"..

Addendum:
Written in Perl, the analytical parser can detect key words and phrases from any speaker in just about any language.
As of yet, programmers have not been able to decipher the rhetoric emanating from one Al Sharpton.

Posted by: Sphynx at September 26, 2011 11:00 AM (fEmj2)

62 Oy, carumba, LOL.

Posted by: PJ at September 26, 2011 11:05 AM (FlVA8)

Big Brother? Well, then --

Obama is a non-stuttering non-clusterf*ck of a non-miserable non-failure.

Posted by: FireHorse at September 26, 2011 11:07 AM (F5OMl)

64 Fuck the Fed. OK, you can report me now.

Posted by: I'm in a New York state of mind at September 26, 2011 11:07 AM (4sQwu)

Barack Obama's presidency: an administration marked by bad policy combined with gross incompetence, but no provable corruption.

Posted by: FireHorse at September 26, 2011 11:10 AM (F5OMl)

66 Obama's stimulus plan: Keeping the employment rate at 90.9%, which is an A-minus in most schools.

Posted by: FireHorse at September 26, 2011 11:12 AM (F5OMl)

67 "...And he once caught a marlin with his bare hands....."

Yeah, but can he use a cougar as a condom?

Posted by: Dick Cheney. What of it? at September 26, 2011 11:14 AM (qisYI)

68 Hmmm.

Did any of you read the Roger Ailes' Newsweek interview over at HuffPo? Yes. They are swerving to the center. It is by design.

Amongst the gems: O'Reilly hates Hannity. Kelly is afraid of blurting out a career killer. Shep is watched with a wary eye.

But, mostly, he reminds us, although not in these exact words, that FNC is a business and ratings is the name of the game.

It was an interesting read.

Posted by: As If! at September 26, 2011 11:16 AM (piMMO)

Hey, Ben: You look Maaaahvelous!

Now, please ask your attack goons to stop pounding on my bedroom door....

Posted by: JustTurnRight at September 26, 2011 11:25 AM (z83Rd)

70 Firehorse: It takes a DOJ that in interested in the law to prove corruption. With the DOJ up to its eyeballs complicit in the various scams and pogoms there will, of course, be no prosecutions for corrupion. I suspect that the Jan '13 Presidential Pardons list will include just about every senior administrator and czar in Washington, and a large chunck of the activist population outside DC.

Posted by: rabidfox at September 26, 2011 11:33 AM (ZdXcK)

71 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at September 26, 2011 12:14 PM (fyOgS)

72 How, exactly, does monitoring everything anything everyone says about the Federal Reserve benefit the taxpayer? FIFY

Posted by: dfbaskwill at September 26, 2011 12:14 PM (71LDo)

...borrowed a page right out of ole' Joe McCarthy's communist witch hunt book ...

The difference being that, whatever his other faults, McCarthy was fundamentally correct, as we now know from the VENONA decrypts and KGB files. So it wasn't a witch hunt at all - McCarthy stood alone in pointing out the extent of penetration of the US government. Bastard!

Posted by: Jay Guevara at September 26, 2011 12:35 PM (CZEZ0)

74 So I guess the Fed will be up 24/7 recording the conversations of Ron Paul and Rand Paul. Great use of our tax dollars. Another Cash for Clueless clunker program.

Posted by: eaglewingz08 at September 26, 2011 01:16 PM (na8r5)

75 What do you mean, "our tax dollars", Ben just has more money printed up. That's the real scary part, the Fed has UNLIMITED funds to purchase whatever listening they want to do WITHOUT any Congressional oversight. Money = Power

Posted by: dscott at September 26, 2011 01:32 PM (gaD9p)

76 Â“Military Industrial Congressional Complex.Â” Yes, advisers cut "Congressional" from the early draft of the speech. Just think, the line may as well have included the Fed for all the attention that Americans gave the warning.

Posted by: D. D. Eisenhower at September 26, 2011 01:45 PM (lpWVn)

77
Ben Bernake and The Fed: Another Stuttering Clusterfuck of a Miserable Failure (ASCoaMF).

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie © at September 26, 2011 02:51 PM (1hM1d)

78 And the comments blame the janitors. Was Joe McCarthy working for the janitors???

Posted by: anon at September 26, 2011 03:17 PM (UbPic)

79 Wow. I did not know all those things about Mr. Bernanke. Makes that Dos Equis guy look like a fairy. The question is, Would you???

Posted by: azkag at September 26, 2011 04:19 PM (O/yrI)

Posted by: ? at September 26, 2011 10:48 PM (mue7s)

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