August 25, 2011
— Ace Unless, I guess, if you pay for a private session.
Contessa Brewer, who has been a fixture on MSNBC since 2003, will no longer be an anchor on the network, TVNewser has learned.For the last year-and-a-half Brewer has anchored the NoonET hour on MSNBC as well as hosting the weekend documentary series “Caught on Camera.” Her final daily newscast is tomorrow but she will continue to host “Caught” and work on other projects for NBC News and MSNBC.
She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack.
She will be missed.
Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy
Posted by: Ace at
02:29 PM
| Comments (152)
Post contains 133 words, total size 2 kb.
Posted by: Curmudgeon at August 25, 2011 02:31 PM (ujg0T)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 02:32 PM (UOM48)
Another Diet Coke nasal enema. When will I learn?
Posted by: JFK's adrenal gland at August 25, 2011 02:33 PM (Xv7f/)
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 02:34 PM (2j/Mv)
Posted by: Al Dull Sharpton at August 25, 2011 02:35 PM (4nfy2)
Guess you haven't been in the MSNBC locker room lately.
Posted by: Keef and Rachel at August 25, 2011 02:35 PM (Xv7f/)
Posted by: SkandiaRecluse at August 25, 2011 02:35 PM (t2hzr)
"She won't be bringing the potato salad to the MENSA picnic"
Posted by: kbdabear at August 25, 2011 02:36 PM (Y+DPZ)
And that's a tough competition.
Posted by: Tami at August 25, 2011 02:36 PM (X6akg)
Try it with Wild Turkey 101...I'd rather roll around in broken glass then jump into a pool of hot sauce than experience that again...
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 02:36 PM (2j/Mv)
Posted by: Curmudgeon at August 25, 2011 02:37 PM (ujg0T)
Posted by: steevy at August 25, 2011 02:38 PM (pV6cO)
Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 02:39 PM (2p0e3)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at August 25, 2011 02:39 PM (UsjBj)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 02:39 PM (4nfy2)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 02:40 PM (UOM48)
Me too.
Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at August 25, 2011 02:41 PM (c0A3e)
Posted by: Max Entropy at August 25, 2011 02:41 PM (lH6z9)
Posted by: Mr Pink (not in a good mood today) at August 25, 2011 02:42 PM (rrdsd)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 02:42 PM (4nfy2)
Posted by: Revrum Al, yes, THAT one! at August 25, 2011 02:43 PM (Zgfnd)
Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at August 25, 2011 02:44 PM (c0A3e)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:40 PM (UOM4
Now that's some funny right there.
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 02:44 PM (/PFGQ)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 02:44 PM (4nfy2)
she hosts Caught on Camera?
that's funny cuz here is Contessa Brewer getting caught touching up her lips
Posted by: soothsayer at August 25, 2011 02:45 PM (Xs7AG)
Posted by: grease monkey at August 25, 2011 02:46 PM (VSWPU)
Me: if you think petroleum and SUVs are killing the planet, why do you own an SUV?
Lib: I just use it to go up to the mountains for skiing and fishing!
Me: Oh, so you wantonly rape the earth, poisoning the air and condemning future generations to misery and hunger just so you can selfishly indulge in your white, upper middle class leisure activities? I thought you were a member of the Sierra Club!
Lib: <sputtering rage>
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 02:46 PM (2j/Mv)
Posted by: Al, the guy who still owes a million dollar judgement at August 25, 2011 02:46 PM (PZiww)
Posted by: jukin at August 25, 2011 02:46 PM (vkkNZ)
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 02:47 PM (4nfy2)
The movie she said she was going to see?
"Closed for the Winter"
Posted by: kbdabear at August 25, 2011 02:47 PM (Y+DPZ)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 02:47 PM (UOM48)
Posted by: California Doomin tea party terrorist and proud of it bitch at August 25, 2011 02:47 PM (8DdAv)
Posted by: Wdavisterry at August 25, 2011 02:48 PM (EG/p1)
If he wasn't riding the barbed cock of Satan right now, I'd throw Ted Kennedy into that mix....and only one bottle of scotch.
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 02:49 PM (2j/Mv)
Posted by: GuyfromNH at August 25, 2011 02:50 PM (kbOju)
About the Times Square terrorist:
CONTESSA BREWER (7:06): I mean the thing is is that and I get frustrated and there was part of me that was hoping this was not going to be anybody with ties to any kind of Islamic country because there are a lot of people who want to use this terrorist intent to justify writing off people who believe in a certain way or
come from certain countries or whose skin color is a certain way. I
mean they use it as justification for really outdated bigotry.
And so there was part of me was really hoping this would not be the case that here would be somebody who is not the defined. I mean heÂ’s accused heÂ’s arrested you know I donÂ’t want to convict him before itÂ’s time to do so. HeÂ’s the guy authorities say is involved. But that being said I mean we know even in recent history you have the Haitari militia from Michigan who have plans to letÂ’s face it create terror.
Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at August 25, 2011 02:50 PM (c0A3e)
Posted by: Faffner the Cat at August 25, 2011 02:52 PM (8DdAv)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (UOM4
My money is on Rachel Maddow being the only survivor, as she is probably the only one who knows how to properly swing a hammer.
Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 02:52 PM (2p0e3)
Brewer, a former news reader on Imus’ show, also said the I-man doesn’t know how to relate to “beautiful women.” “With that fat ass she’s got, she wouldn’t be one of ‘em,” Imus said on the air Friday. “That skank has to spend three hours with makeup in the morning … Who’s she kidding? . . . Plus, she’s dumber than dirt … Oh, my God, what a pig. But I was willing to cut her some slack and not say anything, you know, until – in fact, I didn’t say anything . . . That’s why they have those big double-doors there at MSNBC, you know, so they can get her fat ass in makeup.
Posted by: beedubya at August 25, 2011 02:52 PM (AnTyA)
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (UOM4
Small alteration.
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 02:52 PM (/PFGQ)
Its sad when boobs sag.
Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 02:52 PM (4nfy2)
A receptacle of some kind, I'm sure.
Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 02:53 PM (2p0e3)
Posted by: kansas at August 25, 2011 02:55 PM (nNgbi)
Posted by: Pooter Hound at August 25, 2011 02:55 PM (le5qc)
Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?
Pretty sure I saw him manning my local Carl's Jr. drive thru.
"I said NO onion on my Famous Star, jackass."
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 02:55 PM (3AuGS)
Posted by: Alex at August 25, 2011 02:55 PM (/yzYn)
Who the hell is hiring this wind bag?
Posted by: Jumbo Jogging Shrimp tea party terrorist and Perry supporter at August 25, 2011 06:51 PM (qjUnn)
There's always NPR.
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 02:56 PM (/PFGQ)
Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 06:53 PM (2p0e3)
Contessa Brewer - CumDumpster Extraordinaire
Posted by: eastvalleyphx at August 25, 2011 02:56 PM (qiOph)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fq607HQw26s
Posted by: Mark at August 25, 2011 02:56 PM (nAu6v)
He's now the color voice of that college football powerhouse Florida International University.
...seriously
Posted by: beedubya at August 25, 2011 02:56 PM (AnTyA)
Posted by: Pooter Hound at August 25, 2011 02:56 PM (le5qc)
C*ntessa can take her degree in Broadcast Journalism talking on tv and get a job anywhere!
I forsee a couch in her future......
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 02:57 PM (3AuGS)
He's now the color voice of that college football powerhouse Florida International University.
...seriously
heh
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 02:57 PM (UOM48)
Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 02:58 PM (mJznp)
Posted by: huerfano at August 25, 2011 02:58 PM (kD+se)
Posted by: Al at August 25, 2011 02:58 PM (PZiww)
I'm hoping for a filthy mattress in the alley of a DC ghetto...and being paid in crack.
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 02:59 PM (2j/Mv)
Posted by: dogfish at August 25, 2011 02:59 PM (N2yhW)
Posted by: Dr Phil at August 25, 2011 02:59 PM (8DdAv)
As for Jesse Jackson, I prefer the one where he says he's going to cut off Barry's balls.
Jesse doesn't have the guts to stick his hand in Michelle's pocket.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 03:00 PM (3AuGS)
Posted by: George Orwell what knows Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure at August 25, 2011 03:01 PM (AZGON)
Posted by: steevy at August 25, 2011 03:02 PM (pV6cO)
Posted by: Dr Phil at August 25, 2011 06:59 PM (8DdAv)
Leave my sister alone!
Posted by: Quisling Brewer at August 25, 2011 03:03 PM (UOM48)
ThatÂ’s why they have those big double-doors there at MSNBC, you know, so they can get her fat ass in makeup.
It's true, it's true. She has the kind of ass you beat with a car antenna.
Posted by: Sean Bannion at August 25, 2011 03:03 PM (HUZDZ)
Posted by: Faffner the Cat loves me some Rick Perry bitches at August 25, 2011 03:04 PM (8DdAv)
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 03:04 PM (/PFGQ)
Posted by: cvb at August 25, 2011 03:04 PM (Ud5ks)
If the congresswoman is a ten, and SecState is about an eightpointfive, where does Contessa rank?
Yo noon anchorwoman ass so fat---
Posted by: Pooter Hound at August 25, 2011 03:06 PM (le5qc)
Posted by: pep at August 25, 2011 03:06 PM (6TB1Z)
Posted by: MikeTheMoose Camellia Sinensis Operative at August 25, 2011 03:07 PM (0q2P7)
Posted by: Trimegistus at August 25, 2011 03:08 PM (5/200)
Posted by: C*ntessa at August 25, 2011 03:08 PM (N2yhW)
Posted by: pep at August 25, 2011 07:06 PM (6TB1Z)
It's a feature, not a bug. Does SCOAMF mean anything to you?
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 03:11 PM (/PFGQ)
Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 03:11 PM (mJznp)
And if it was a girl - Barack
Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 03:12 PM (mJznp)
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 03:13 PM (2j/Mv)
http://is.gd/gA8jiE
Seems she is stepping right into Contessa's shoes. She takes a Perry statement and completely misrepresents it -EVEN showing the whole statement to be not at all the way she interprets it.
Posted by: Less at August 25, 2011 03:15 PM (PGXeZ)
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into an all-you-can-eat buffet Weight Watchers meeting...
Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 03:15 PM (mJznp)
I've had luggage with more personality than her...was probably smarter, too.
Not to mention, better skin.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 03:15 PM (3AuGS)
Posted by: Hollowpoint at August 25, 2011 03:16 PM (SY2Kh)
A certain Ewok hardest hit. That piece on her was Bardian in its brilliance.
Now they need to get rid of that Rachel Maddow fella.
Posted by: BackwardsBoy at August 25, 2011 03:17 PM (d0Tfm)
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into a Weight Watchers meeting...
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into an all-you-can-eat buffet Weight Watchers meeting...
Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 07:15 PM (mJznp)
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 03:17 PM (3AuGS)
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 03:18 PM (/PFGQ)
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 03:19 PM (2j/Mv)
Posted by: dananjcon at August 25, 2011 03:20 PM (q1Tbv)
Posted by: dananjcon at August 25, 2011 07:20 PM (q1Tbv)
H8ter!!
Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 03:23 PM (/PFGQ)
Chris Jansing steps up to continue the noble journalistic traditions of being stupid and making shit up.
Posted by: AMartel at August 25, 2011 03:27 PM (1Bqk7)
Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 03:30 PM (2j/Mv)
Hmmmm, didn't she used to be on Strangers with Candy?
Posted by: Faffner the Cat loves me some Rick Perry bitches at August 25, 2011 03:30 PM (8DdAv)
The only test she needs to pass is the pencil test. Maybe she failed.
I think it was a urine bath you're referring to.
Posted by: Faffner the Cat loves me some Rick Perry bitches at August 25, 2011 03:33 PM (8DdAv)
Posted by: Crusty the Clown at August 25, 2011 03:36 PM (8DdAv)
Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:54 PM
He was being considered for a couple of anchor jobs in L.A. and bombed out on both.
Posted by: arhooley at August 25, 2011 03:43 PM (3n2lK)
She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack.
She will be missed.
Ace. That there's funny. Somebody has to e-mail that to her.
Posted by: observer at August 25, 2011 03:46 PM (GAP2O)
Posted by: toby928™ at August 25, 2011 03:53 PM (GTbGH)
Posted by: No Whining at August 25, 2011 03:59 PM (HVDho)
Posted by: NMS at August 25, 2011 04:05 PM (pcdjz)
Posted by: SFGoth at August 25, 2011 04:11 PM (dZ756)
Posted by: Ducatisti at August 25, 2011 04:14 PM (KYE7u)
Posted by: Sock Pro at August 25, 2011 04:26 PM (4t9J5)
Posted by: Jon Huntsman at August 25, 2011 04:34 PM (ApIyR)
Contessa Brewer represented the highest level of hotness that MSNBC is capable of providing, and without her, the average hotness plummets to negligible. With Rachel Maddow bringing up the rear.
Posted by: sunny black at August 25, 2011 04:38 PM (0dyYY)
Posted by: RickZ at August 25, 2011 04:53 PM (SLo0H)
Posted by: Genetic Tunder at August 25, 2011 04:57 PM (dbYHP)
Posted by: tmi3rd at August 25, 2011 05:13 PM (WRtsc)
Posted by: Watership Down AudioBook at August 25, 2011 05:25 PM (z3/Dt)
Posted by: Brazofuerte at August 25, 2011 07:02 PM (c6PHY)
Posted by: Tanker J.D. at August 25, 2011 07:19 PM (8b126)
Posted by: fbaker at August 25, 2011 07:35 PM (ySLSS)
Posted by: Donna V. at August 25, 2011 08:08 PM (lb6Bt)
Posted by: Anthony Weiner at August 25, 2011 08:10 PM (NZMKc)
And to forget someone with a first name like "Contessa" tells you how completely forgettable this dull scrunt is.
Posted by: Donna V. at August 25, 2011 08:11 PM (lb6Bt)
"Is she, like, a real Contessa?"
Yeah, she's one of your socialists named after aristocrats. (Who, secretly, see themselves as aristos. Really, do you think Contessa considers herself misnamed? No, she undoubtably believes she is like an actual contessa ministering to the dumb serfs.)
Not suprising to me that educated left-wingers see themselves in such a flattering light. There are more than a few *laugh* "blue collar" Dem voters willing to grovel in front of the Obamabots. Really, honestly, I still know ancient Dem voters who convinced themselves 50 years ago that the Dems are for "the common man."
Their delusions are so deep, nothing will rescue them.
Posted by: Donna V. at August 25, 2011 08:23 PM (lb6Bt)
'Tessa....we hardly knew ye! So who gets the slot......
any "ho" dat de Rev decides? He be de top monkey
since Olbermann done crashed and burned.
Posted by: grizzlybare at August 25, 2011 11:24 PM (4V89N)
Posted by: Keef and Rachel at August 26, 2011 06:24 AM (Xv7f/)
An Ace Clasic that I saved:
As I have noted with footnotes and authoritative citations previously, Contessa Brewer is a dirty, lying, pus-mouthed whore.
A cheap, sore-riddled nasty bit of gutterscrunge who'll rent you her mouth for the change in your pocket.
A tawdry wallow-trollop oozing with syphilitic fester who raises her filthy skirts at the scent of crack-smoke.
A disease-dripping pincushion, the media's vile mattress of last resort, a pathogen in garish vinyl high heels, a loose-toothed croup-breathed night crawler reeking of bathtub gin, fungicide, and the genetic stink of human desperation.
A skanky bit of mung-trash sloughing off diseased skin like a leprous snake. (A leprous snake who whores out her verminous cloaca for two bits a pop, I mean.)
This sad clown of a whore, oozing with foul custard and slack and sloppy as an over-used trash bag, is too stupid to know how to lie judiciously, and so lies promiscuously and wantonly, demonstrating all the discretion she once showed in junior high when her nickname was "Automatic" Brewer.
By the way: No, I don't think Contessa Brewer really "did" this. She's too stupid. She doesn't have that kind of responsibility. Her job is to wear a wonderbra, eat rice pudding with a "safety spoon," blow the line producer, and read the phonetically-spelled questions someone else writes for her.
Some pale fat loser in the producer chair did it. But I don't know that porky nobody's name, and Contessa Brewer knew what was being done here, so the hell with Typhoid Brewer.
Posted by: PaulC at August 26, 2011 06:38 AM (F26eZ)
Posted by: Comanche Voter at August 26, 2011 06:41 AM (3ESDJ)
Posted by: Rocco at August 26, 2011 06:41 AM (Xv7f/)
Posted by: antineocon at August 26, 2011 01:20 PM (PtLXD)
Posted by: antineocon at August 26, 2011 01:22 PM (PtLXD)
If u hate Contessa, then I guess your idea of "interesting" news is the monumental dullard Scarborough. Luckily, Contessa never dumbed down her broadcasts to ur levels.........enjoy all the other MSNBC anchors that u think are sooo much better losers. Guess you would rather watch Al Sharpton instead. MSNBC proves yet again they cannot utilize true talent to save their lives. Contessa was always too good for them.
Posted by: Vinny at August 26, 2011 01:45 PM (Qe8+a)
Posted by: Cuntessa's job councillor at August 26, 2011 07:05 PM (fQYHU)
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Posted by: Vic at August 25, 2011 02:30 PM (M9Ie6)