Ace of Spades HQ

October 11, 2012

Flashback: Obama Is a Lightworker, Like Jesus
— Ace

I forget who the heck I got this from. You've read it already.

But I've had this tab open for days now. At some point, I either have to close it or post it.

So let us return, briefly, back to the start of the Cult of Obama.

Is Obama an enlightened being? / Spiritual wise ones say: This sure ain't no ordinary politician. You buying it?
By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist
Published 4:00 a.m., Friday, June 6, 2008
...
Barack Obama isn't really one of us. Not in the normal way, anyway.
...
Dismiss it all you like, but I've heard from far too many enormously smart, wise, spiritually attuned people who've been intuitively blown away by Obama's presence - not speeches, not policies, but sheer presence - to say it's just a clever marketing ploy, a slick gambit carefully orchestrated by hotshot campaign organizers...
Here's where it gets gooey. Many spiritually advanced people I know (not coweringly religious, mind you, but deeply spiritual) identify Obama as a Lightworker, that rare kind of attuned being who has the ability to lead us not merely to new foreign policies or health care plans or whatnot, but who can actually help usher in a new way of being on the planet, of relating and connecting and engaging with this bizarre earthly experiment. These kinds of people actually help us evolve. They are philosophers and peacemakers of a very high order, and they speak not just to reason or emotion, but to the soul.
The unusual thing is, true Lightworkers almost never appear on such a brutal, spiritually demeaning stage as national politics. This is why Obama is so rare....
There's a vast amount of positive energy swirling about that's been held back by the armies of BushCo darkness, and this energy has now found a conduit, a lightning rod, is now effortlessly self-organizing around Obama's candidacy. People and emotions and ideas of high and positive vibration are automatically drawn to him. It's exactly like how Bush was a magnet for the low vibrational energies of fear and war and oppression and aggression, but, you know, completely reversed. And different. And far, far better.

Four dead in Benghazi, blood on the Administration's hands, and nothing but lies -- and the arrest of a filmmaker-- since.

Where's your Lightworker now?

By the way: How perfect is it that that drunk-dial of a column was posted at 4:00am?

Oh: Let me clear this one too: How the media loved Obama to death. It was in the sidebar, too.

Posted by: Ace at 01:47 PM | Comments (161)
Post contains 444 words, total size 3 kb.

1 This cheers me up. The last thread ruined my buzz!

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna at October 11, 2012 01:49 PM (9+ccr)

2 I'd forgotten that the execrable Mark Morford existed.

Saw the byline. Quit reading.

Posted by: Nicholas Kronos at October 11, 2012 01:49 PM (h9gW0)

3 I remember when this first appeared. I had a good laugh then, and having one again now.

Lightworker, my ass. He's a Doucheworker.

Posted by: EC at October 11, 2012 01:49 PM (doBIb)

4 All those faux Messiah quotes are collected at: http://obamamessiah.blogspot.com/ Makes you either want to laugh or cry at the nuttiness of the obama acolytes.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at October 11, 2012 01:50 PM (0nogT)

5 Morford is a hateful prick.

Posted by: california red at October 11, 2012 01:50 PM (Ho3p+)

6 http://tinyurl.com/8n8ooeg

Russia says it will not renew arms agreement with U.S.

another reason to corral the cult

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at October 11, 2012 01:50 PM (0It32)

7 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4yvvCv79QY

Posted by: Cake at October 11, 2012 01:51 PM (4pSIn)

8 Yeah, alot of innocent Mexicans are running from those Lightworker bullets too.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at October 11, 2012 01:51 PM (PHb2k)

9 Isn't the guy he quoted a developer for Bioware? Didn't we find out that this whole "Lightworker" silliness was based off of KOTOR or something?

Posted by: MrShad at October 11, 2012 01:52 PM (Xqfwb)

10 Rick Wilson @TheRickWilson And I thought Cutter hit bottom RT @freddoso: #facepalm Ben LaBolt: Â‘The person talking about Big Bird is Mitt RomneyÂ’ bit.ly/PqxHsm

Posted by: Evilpens at October 11, 2012 01:52 PM (ck76k)

11 All these memories are fresh in my mind -- 2008 seems like yesterday. I have to admit, these last 4 years went by fast. But I don't know if I can withstand another 4.2 years of this lying communist brother of Muslims.

Posted by: soothsayer at October 11, 2012 01:52 PM (jUytm)

12 Ace, are you hoarding tabs again? You're only hurting the browsers that love you by doing that.

Posted by: Hal at October 11, 2012 01:53 PM (2wZs/)

13 Is he Clear?

Posted by: Operating Thetan 1138 at October 11, 2012 01:53 PM (FGyIi)

14 Please, don't forget Fast and Furious. So many dead.

Posted by: yes at October 11, 2012 01:53 PM (LpQbZ)

15 blown away by Obama's presence - not speeches, not policies, but sheer presence -.....

===========

I'm pretty sure I've never been 'blown away' by anyone's presence.

Posted by: Tami at October 11, 2012 01:54 PM (X6akg)

16 I think he posted that 'light worker' comment into the AoS editor and it came out 'lightworker' and he stuck with it. 'Cause I don't think anyone would argue with that.

How many freakin' rounds of golf has he shanked in four years?

Posted by: Schrödinger's cat at October 11, 2012 01:54 PM (feFL6)

17 I forget who the heck I got this from. You've read it already. Nope, I'm pretty sure I'd remember puking on my monitor. What drivel! These nitwits can't get crushed soon enough.

Posted by: t-bird at October 11, 2012 01:54 PM (FcR7P)

18 @7

They need more "flexibility." I will grant them this, as I'm incredibly flexible. (anally speaking)

Posted by: Borock O'bama at October 11, 2012 01:55 PM (d4vjp)

19 Peronal Jesus under the link. I called that fat softball right over the heart of the plate.

Posted by: AndrewsDad at October 11, 2012 01:55 PM (C2//T)

20 Please, don't forget Fast and Furious.
So many dead.

And so much Vin Diesel. Man, that guy is buff!

Posted by: Joe "on the aisle" Biden at October 11, 2012 01:55 PM (vjyZP)

21 Lightworker my a$$. Evil has a palpable presence too.

Posted by: Cate Simpleton at October 11, 2012 01:55 PM (1JJGO)

I'm going to throw up.

Like the last time.

Posted by: HtP at October 11, 2012 01:55 PM (jx2j9)

Morford is a hateful prick.

and nuttier than a fruitcake, apparently.

Posted by: fluffy at October 11, 2012 01:55 PM (4pSIn)

I typically find those that say they are spiritual are full of it. They say that because they know they should like God, and maybe actually believe he exists, but they certainly don't want a God that may interfere with their life. And in no way are they spiritual at all.

Posted by: SH at October 11, 2012 01:56 PM (gmeXX)

25 I'm pretty sure I've never been 'blown away' by anyone's presence.
You've never met Jasmine Byrne

Posted by: wooga at October 11, 2012 01:56 PM (vjyZP)

26 While Obama is hanging with Hollywood celebs, Romney's visiting with Revs. Graham.

https://twitter.com/andreamsaul/status/256511493141577728

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at October 11, 2012 01:56 PM (piMMO)

27 Lightworker my a$$. It's been said before: more like "light worker".

Posted by: t-bird at October 11, 2012 01:57 PM (FcR7P)

28 who've been intuitively blown away by Obama's presence "intuitively blown away" ... ROFLMAO! That isn't even human-speak, let alone English. ....... ....... ....... I'm still laughing.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 11, 2012 01:57 PM (X3lox)

Is that you fluffy?

Posted by: concrete girl at October 11, 2012 01:57 PM (y2Ojs)

30
[Obama is] going to win on sheer gut instinct. Not his Â– ours. HeÂ’s going to win because no matter what little bump Romney enjoys in a handful of polls, no matter the sad truism that Obama just wonÂ’t bare his intellectual fangs and go full throttle at the GOPÂ’s homophobia, racism, misogyny and appallingly awful economic agenda, he has been able to build a beautifully wrought foundation of rock-solid energy lo these past four years.

ItÂ’s the reassuring feeling that heÂ’s got it, that when it comes to pulling the trigger on Osama, finally supporting gay marriage, or responding appropriately to nearly any global crisis you can name, ObamaÂ’s intellectual acumen hooks right into the still-incredible sense that the man actually has a functioning soul, and you just know: the lights are on. HeÂ’s got it under control. ThereÂ’s tremendous sense of competence where we need it most.

Yogi Mark Morfords - Why wonÂ’t Obama step up? 10/9

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at October 11, 2012 01:57 PM (kdS6q)

31 "Spiritually advanced" = "Idiots"

Posted by: Marty at October 11, 2012 01:58 PM (XD+u1)

32 http://tinyurl.com/8p4nwn2

polls closed

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at October 11, 2012 01:58 PM (0It32)

reminds me of the song ... four dead in Ben-gha-zi ..

Posted by: Honey Badger at October 11, 2012 01:58 PM (GvYeG)

34 Post slower, please. I'm having trouble writing all your names down.

Posted by: IRS audit team at October 11, 2012 01:58 PM (4WhSY)

35 Wow, Beano Cook has passed. Not the biggest fan, but I thought him as virtually immortal.

Posted by: logprof at October 11, 2012 01:59 PM (V/U0X)

36 Shouldn't this post be accompanied by a photo of the Lightworker with a halo? So we can get the full impact of his godlike awesomeness and all? Oh, and apparently his light was a bit dim during his first debate with Romney, the mere mortal.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 11, 2012 01:59 PM (LhJo8)

37 Obama only has the ability to kill people, and I doubt he'll be able to work a miracle and reserect his re-election chances.

Posted by: Gmac at October 11, 2012 01:59 PM (IanLz)

38 By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist He's made his career by writing the worst liberal bullshit for years on end. Enough said.

Posted by: Ed Anger at October 11, 2012 02:00 PM (tOkJB)

39 "spiritual" = druggie.

Posted by: schizoid at October 11, 2012 02:00 PM (cS+VT)

Is that you fluffy?

Who you callin' fluffy?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xxgRUyzgs0

Posted by: Vernon Reid at October 11, 2012 02:00 PM (4pSIn)

41 Ease up on the pain meds...........

Posted by: J.B. STONE at October 11, 2012 02:00 PM (UPefW)

"intuitively blown away" ... ROFLMAO! That isn't even human-speak, let alone English.

Exactly! He obviously meant 'literally'!! Look, monkeys!!!!

Posted by: Joe Biden! at October 11, 2012 02:01 PM (Gt8ei)

43 I still can't believe how many people fell for this empty crap in 2008. I wonder how certain leaders get elected, but doing so quickly godwin's the topic.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at October 11, 2012 02:01 PM (FGyIi)

44 Yeah, yeah, lightworker, election, debate, whatever. That's not important. What's important is the smoking-hot brunette MILF in red behind home plate at Nationals Park tonight.

Posted by: General Zod at October 11, 2012 02:01 PM (2+bRt)

45 Hey what about us? We're lightworkers, too!!!

Posted by: Loafers at October 11, 2012 02:01 PM (KZi9D)

46 Obama is a Chicago Jesus. He brought us healthcare, the stimulus that saved the economy, and he killed Bin Laden. In his second term he will finally mandate government covered sex change operations. Why don't you want to pay for me to fully become Joan?

Posted by: Jon at October 11, 2012 02:01 PM (/YJYi)

47 Live long and perspire.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at October 11, 2012 02:02 PM (FGyIi)

48
I like the Building a Religion vid better, ymmv.

Other people enjoying the Light Worker Show:

23 million unemployed
48 million on food stamps
women in egypt
school girls in afganistan
people who drive with gas, or eat food, or use energy

Light. Worker.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at October 11, 2012 02:03 PM (PHb2k)

49 no matter the sad truism that Obama just wonÂ’t bare his intellectual fangs

He has.

Turned out he's got fangs like Herbert from Family Guy.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 11, 2012 02:03 PM (/kI1Q)

50 Oh, ace, you gotta start posting all the unicorn, rainbow, white robe, doves on the arm, glowing, distant stare images of this douche bag.

It's time to start rubbing their noses in all that shit.

***

How about the state of the union speeches where he is bathed in glorious rays of light?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at October 11, 2012 02:03 PM (piMMO)

51 Waves at JB...

Posted by: backhoe at October 11, 2012 02:04 PM (ULH4o)

52 Morford, when the ass was kissed.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at October 11, 2012 02:04 PM (FGyIi)

What's important is the smoking-hot brunette MILF in red behind home plate at Nationals Park tonight.

**Furiously rewinding PVR**

Jackpot

Posted by: Lurking Canuck at October 11, 2012 02:04 PM (Gt8ei)

Back in 2008, after that butt-dialed column went up, I engaged in some "complete waste of time" on-line arguments with dummies who actually believed that crap. Or AxelTurfers who were being paid to spew on cue.

How could anyone with more than one functioning brain cell think for one minute that a Chicago Machine Political Hack could be anything other than a greedy, grasping, grifter of a soulless political thug?

Vote Early Vote Often isn't a joke in places like Chicago, it's how those scum live their entire lives. They lie, cheat, steal, and make promises they know perfectly well they have no intention of delivering.

Posted by: Boots at October 11, 2012 02:04 PM (neKzn)

55 Oh, ace, you gotta start posting all the unicorn, rainbow, white robe, doves on the arm, glowing, distant stare images of this douche bag.

November 7.

WHERE IS YOUR LIGHTWORKER NOW?!

*pea soup*

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 11, 2012 02:04 PM (/kI1Q)

56 I remember reading Mark Morford during the Clinton years. He's a liberal drone, undeserving of critical examination.

Posted by: Ed Anger at October 11, 2012 02:04 PM (tOkJB)

57 Those Jobless Claims numbers were missing...

California!

Major adjustment on the way.

http://tinyurl.com/8ro2ock

Posted by: Dang© at October 11, 2012 02:05 PM (R18D0)

58 Can't we just take a moment to appreciate Obama? That was still my favorite.

Posted by: JackStraw at October 11, 2012 02:05 PM (TMB3S)

59 Lightworker? I think everyone has misinterpreted the phrase. It's Light Worker... as in lazy-assed.

So, yes, Obama was and is a light worker. A very light worker.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at October 11, 2012 02:05 PM (eHIJJ)

60 In order to read Morford you must first know that every single flaw that he points out in others are flaws that he himself exemplifies.

Posted by: navybrat at October 11, 2012 02:05 PM (DWX1w)

61 Not only is he not a God, he's not even a very good example of a human. He's a dope.

Rope a dope. That's my cue!

Posted by: Joe Biden aneurysm Inc. at October 11, 2012 02:05 PM (BAnPT)

He is the One. Do you believe now Trinity?

Suck it Wingnutz, You have Magical Hair/Undies, we have the Lightbringer.

Posted by: Gregg at October 11, 2012 02:06 PM (VrVBw)

63 BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That's the funniest thing I've read in months!

I better laugh or I'll stop sobbing at the thought that supposedly intelligent, mature Americans (well, mostly Americans) put a-holes who think like this in charge! My God!

Posted by: LCDR M(Ret) at October 11, 2012 02:06 PM (qg8VH)

One would think that even the smartest stupid libs would be getting tired of SCOAMF the Hoople taking their money and giving it to his buddies like this:

http://tinyurl.com/9qh7pmb

Posted by: HtP at October 11, 2012 02:06 PM (jx2j9)

65 A poll (commissioned by 2 newspapers and a TV station) shows Romney up 7 in Florida at 51%.

I have a proposal for Obama: Don't campaign at all in swing states. I've noticed when people see Obama and his surrogates, they aren't favorably inclined to him.

In fact, I propose that Obama just stop appearing in public. He might win this election if he does it.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (T0NGe)

66 Hunh. I always thought "light worker" was a spoof. But there it is,in zeroes and ones. from the level-headed profession of journalism in the level-headed city of San Fransisco.

Posted by: Truman North at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (I2LwF)

67 o/t: bob beckel just said (& i'd read this today) that the early voting in OH was 2 to 1 Obama.

a: OH is not MA or CA or IL.
b: didn't i read that the by-party registration was favoring Republicans
c: is OH the only Dem enthusiastic place? cause it sure aint in other places

Posted by: kelley in virginia at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (HNwOT)

68 Let us not forget this juicy bit of banter from Barky fanboi, Evan Thomas, right after the election in 2008: THOMAS: There is a slightly creepy cult of personality about all of this. I mean, he is such an admirable -- ROSE: Â‘Slightly creepy cult of personalityÂ’? THOMAS: Yes. ROSE: WhatÂ’s Â‘slightly creepyÂ’ about it? THOMAS: It just makes me a little uneasy that heÂ’s so singular. HeÂ’s clearly managing his own spectacle. He knows how to do it. HeÂ’s a -- I think, a deeply manipulative guy -- you know, this could be a useful thing in a leader -- ROSE: How so is he Â‘deeply manipulativeÂ’? THOMAS: I think he's always in control, you know -- he controls events, events don't control him. He's a pretty calm guy. He seem to be able to get people to do pretty much what he wants. Of course, Thomas is talking about how the left is controlled by the Indonesian Dog-Eating Retard ... which is no mean feat as the left craves to be controlled by someone ... a Nobel savage being the ultimate in leftist masters. Thomas recovered very quickly from this bout with mild sanity and continued on with his aiding and abetting the ineligible retard in this quest to destroy America.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (X3lox)

69 Oh, and apparently his light was a bit dim during his first debate with Romney, the mere mortal.

Posted by: nerdygirl at October 11, 2012 05:59 PM (LhJo

------------------------------------------

Nothing out-shines the electric underwear.

Posted by: Soona at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (6szqB)

70 As for spirituality, I like the words of the late George Carlin:

"Girls, getting an Asian symbol tattooed on the small of your back doesn't make you more spiritual, especially when the only prayer you have ever uttered is 'God, I hope I'm not pregnant!"

Posted by: navybrat at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (DWX1w)

71 This Morford fellow would be the perfect foil for honing one's Lifesmanship skills. Bay area morons need to hook ace up with an invite to the SF Gate winter solstice party so we can get a 20,000 word post out of it.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at October 11, 2012 02:07 PM (+lsX1)

72 Captain Spock, Ace. He was a captain from STII forward. /geek

Posted by: Dr. Todd Ambrosius at October 11, 2012 02:08 PM (XquQz)

73 My own personal JESUS never did Hookah Hits , ate dog or swung clubs at little dimpled balls to release his aggression...

But thats just me ....

Posted by: AmericanDawg at October 11, 2012 02:08 PM (COr7y)

74 The last sentence seems to be missing:
"I love you man!!!"

Posted by: Max Entropy at October 11, 2012 02:08 PM (v469g)

75 In fact, I propose that Obama just stop appearing in public. He might win this election if he does it.

remember that the polling against Obamacare was horrible when Bambi got on TV daily to talk about it. Once he stopped that, the polling became some what better for Obamacare. Doesn't he get it?

Posted by: kelley in virginia at October 11, 2012 02:08 PM (HNwOT)

76 too funny, GOP should replay this stuff from 2008 more often.

Posted by: joeindc44 found the last comment to be vile, particularly vile at October 11, 2012 02:08 PM (QxSug)

77
2 to 1 obama. How the f would bob beckel know, they aren't counting votes yet. He is as full of shit as biden.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (PHb2k)

78 Those Jobless Claims numbers were missing...

California!

Major adjustment on the way.

http://tinyurl.com/8ro2ock

Posted by: DangÂ© at October 11, 2012 06:05 PM (R18D0)

ahhh exactly as I suspected

Posted by: The Jackhole at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (nTgAI)

79 I had this picture blown up and it now hangs on my wall over the bed. Ignore the stains on it.

http://tinyurl.com/9sxry5f

Posted by: Rupert Pupkin, Esq. at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (/YJYi)

80 "A poll (commissioned by 2 newspapers and a TV station) shows Romney up 7 in Florida at 51%." Great news for Obama. Derp!

Posted by: Gerg at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (aHR5E)

81 The bigger they are, the harder they fall.

Topple the idol.

Posted by: mama winger in paul ryan's district at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (P6QsQ)

82 California! Major adjustment on the way. Wait 'til next week. With gas "necessarily skyrocketing" up to $5.50 in So Cal over the weekend, there's going to be adjustments, all right.

Posted by: t-bird at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (FcR7P)

83 thanks Guy--those Obama people--no lie is too outrageous

Posted by: kelley in virginia at October 11, 2012 02:09 PM (HNwOT)

84 What a load of crap.

Posted by: BignJames at October 11, 2012 02:10 PM (HtUkt)

85 yep, jesus was all up about gay marriage and abotryon

Posted by: joeindc44 found the last comment to be vile, particularly vile at October 11, 2012 02:10 PM (QxSug)

This is what serves as a dem priority:

http://tinyurl.com/8ukygwa

Posted by: HtP at October 11, 2012 02:11 PM (jx2j9)

87 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at October 11, 2012 02:11 PM (6o4Fb)

88 Morford makes Sully look calm and rational.

Posted by: Real Joe, ready for cocktails at October 11, 2012 02:11 PM (PD2ad)

89 o/t: bob beckel just said ( i'd read this today) that the early voting in OH was 2 to 1 Obama.

a: OH is not MA or CA or IL.
b: didn't i read that the by-party registration was favoring Republicans
c: is OH the only Dem enthusiastic place? cause it sure aint in other places

Posted by: kelley in virginia at October 11, 2012 06:07 PM (HNwOT)

Dickel is a drunken ass who never worked for a winning candidate and suffers from verbal diarrhea. If he said the sky is blue I'd look up to check.

Posted by: huerfano at October 11, 2012 02:11 PM (bAGA/)

90 As this guy was writing this he was fapping furiously.

Posted by: steevy at October 11, 2012 02:11 PM (6o4Fb)

Has anybody heard that Fox will be broadcasting the Documentary 2016 this coming Sunday evening?

I want to confirm before I tell any libtards in case they try shooting me down for a false report.

Posted by: LGoPs at October 11, 2012 02:12 PM (4x8W0)

92 Obama Is a Lightworker, Like Jesus Hidden transcripts, no records of him 'til he was thirty-three, just like Obama! --err, just like Jesus, I mean.

Posted by: Mark Mofo at October 11, 2012 02:12 PM (FcR7P)

93 Yeah. Is that the same guy who looked into the distance when he hugged grieving Sean Smith's mom in front of her son's casket? Enlightened indeed.

Posted by: TD at October 11, 2012 02:12 PM (C3KwS)

Gag me with a Matrix spoon. I always wondered where that "Lightworker" bullshit came from.

OTOH, I'd like to meet that idiot's drug dealer. I hear they get some pretty good shit out there on the left coast.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at October 11, 2012 02:12 PM (lOmbq)

95 Bickel is a loathsome toad.....and I mean that in a nice way.

Posted by: BignJames at October 11, 2012 02:13 PM (HtUkt)

96 Rick Wilson @TheRickWilson THAT is how we ROLL: RT @adamsmithtimes: Siren!: Romney opens up 7 point lead in Fla after debate bit.ly/RS1Qiz #sayfie

Posted by: Evilpens at October 11, 2012 02:13 PM (ck76k)

97 KELLY: Libya security cut while Vienna embassy gained Chevy Volts Examining the State DepartmentÂ’s misplaced green priorities Bring that up Ryan.

Posted by: Up with people! at October 11, 2012 02:13 PM (kzFo5)

98 "Rick Wilson @TheRickWilson THAT is how we ROLL: RT @adamsmithtimes: Siren!: Romney opens up 7 point lead in Fla after debate bit.ly/RS1Qiz #sayfie" Great news for Obama. Romney's toast. Derp!

Posted by: Gerg at October 11, 2012 02:13 PM (aHR5E)

52 I like the Building a Religion vid better, ymmv.

You mean the one with the Cake song, 'Comfort Eagle'?

Yeah.

The original one....the one that came out in 2008, that went viral....I like that one best too.

There have been others made since then.

But that first one was great.

Posted by: wheatie at October 11, 2012 02:13 PM (l5RhJ)

100 84 "A poll (commissioned by 2 newspapers and a TV station) shows Romney up 7 in Florida at 51%."

Great news for Obama. Derp!
=============================

all part of the master plan, creature who chooses to live in darkness instead of the Light of the Clean Articulate Human Valhalla!

Posted by: mallfly at October 11, 2012 02:14 PM (bJm7W)

101 Check out the size of the crowd in NC for a Romney rally tonight. http://tinyurl.com/9qaw89n

Posted by: JackStraw at October 11, 2012 02:14 PM (TMB3S)

102 As this guy was writing this he was fapping furiously.

Posted by: steevy at October 11, 2012 06:11 PM (6o4Fb)

--------------------------------------------

He needs to watch that. It'll gum up the hard drive.

Posted by: Soona at October 11, 2012 02:14 PM (6szqB)

103 I'll repost from my post of this morning, describing the best line in the Noemie Emory (sp?) column:

It had been the real thing, not a commonplace fling with your generic Democrat, but the love of a lifetime, the genuine article, the sum of all dreams: He was not just a Democrat, he was also a liberal. He was not just a liberal, he also biracial, also multinational; also hip, cool, and clever. He was themselves as they wanted to be.

That sums it all up. Obama's acolytes are people of very little actual accomplishment. Or bears of very little brain. Whichever.

Posted by: Zetas everywhere at October 11, 2012 02:14 PM (6TB1Z)

104 Debate pushes Romney 7 points ahead of Obama; 51-44% in FL http://tinyurl.com/996379a

Posted by: Evilpens at October 11, 2012 02:15 PM (ck76k)

105 Captain Spock, Ace. He was a captain from STII forward. /geek

Posted by: Dr. Todd Ambrosius at October 11, 2012 06:08 PM (XquQz)

I see at least one more correction needed there.

Posted by: Captain Kir at October 11, 2012 02:15 PM (6LvlL)

106 by the way, I would have thought that everyone would know by now that a four iron is the modern equivalent of the Staff of the Shepherd of Shephards.

Posted by: mallfly at October 11, 2012 02:15 PM (bJm7W)

107 You're all biphobic transophobes.

Posted by: Mark Morford at October 11, 2012 06:11 PM (60GaT)

I've only had two drinks. Honest!

Posted by: HtP at October 11, 2012 02:15 PM (jx2j9)

108 Oh, and apparently his light was a bit dim during his first debate with Romney, the mere mortal.

That evil Mitt Romney and his damnable dimmer switch!

Posted by: pep at October 11, 2012 02:16 PM (6TB1Z)

109 from the level-headed profession of journalism in the level-headed city of San Fransisco. To be fair, I think "The Gate" one of those free streetbox papers like "The Metro" and "Yank".

Posted by: t-bird at October 11, 2012 02:16 PM (FcR7P)

110 What is this 'light' you talk about?

Posted by: helen keller at October 11, 2012 02:17 PM (Y//vu)

111 I have proof, proof(!!!) that Barack Obama descended from Heaven.

http://tinyurl.com/95fomqg

Posted by: Jordan at October 11, 2012 02:17 PM (/YJYi)

112 >>>It's exactly like how Bush was a magnet for the low vibrational energies of fear and war and oppression and aggression, but, you know, completely reversed. And different. And far, far better.

Bwahaha! Right before this was published, Mark and his editor were doing tequila shooters and lines of cocaine off of an unconscious, Brazilian cabana boy's naked torso.

Posted by: Fritz at October 11, 2012 02:17 PM (vm7ot)

113 re 110: Greg can tell you that that poll presumes that Republicans will actually turn out to vote instead of counting their money and trying to rob welfare recipients.

Posted by: mallfly at October 11, 2012 02:18 PM (bJm7W)

114 Beckel? Turd in The Five's punchbowl.

He's the token propagandist to make the set "fair and balanced". He's also the reason I refuse to watch the show. They knowingly employ an asshat liar to be a foil. Love Gutfeld and the leg chair but it's not enough to overlook the giant sphincter.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at October 11, 2012 02:19 PM (eHIJJ)

115 The fun parts in that Lightworker column are the comments! Priceless!

Posted by: mare at October 11, 2012 02:20 PM (A98Xu)

116 He's the Lightbringer.

That's "Lucifer" in Latin.

Posted by: Ozzie at October 11, 2012 02:20 PM (ZkIzO)

117 "Barack Obama isn't really one of us. Not in the normal way, anyway." That's pretty damn racist of you. Or are you referring to his overt homosexuality? "Dismiss it all you like, but I've heard from far too many enormously smart, wise, spiritually attuned people who've been ... blown ... by Obama ..." Yep. "it's just a clever marketing ploy, a slick gambit carefully orchestrated by hotshot campaign organizers" Yep. "Here's where it gets gooey." No, where it got gooey is where Obama was blowing all those people. "who can actually help usher in a new way of being on the planet" Yes, of being destitute. "of relating and connecting" No doubt about that. "they speak not just to reason" Yep. "There's a vast amount of positive energy swirling about that's been held back by the armies of BushCo darkness" Well, now we know exactly what sort of energy was swirling about and being held back by "BushCo." "People and emotions and ideas of high and positive vibration are automatically drawn to him." Mostly homosexuals. And Socialists. And racist African-Americans. And women who, to quote Obama speaking about his own mother, have "Jungle Fever." Or perhaps another kind of fever. (Although I don't think any STDs induce fever. Hardly an expert though.) And "ideas of high and positive vibration" like Communism, Islam, and "You're a Racist!." "It's exactly like how Bush was a magnet for the low vibrational energies of fear and war and oppression and aggression, but, you know, completely reversed. And different. And far, far better." Yeah. Thank Marx that Bush is gone, and we're now completely free of "fear and war and oppression and aggression."

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:22 PM (QEfsO)

118 This guy O-bah-muhh must have forgot to pay his union dues.

Posted by: Lightworkers Union Local 666 at October 11, 2012 02:22 PM (sTju8)

119

Hayssoose still has plenty of worshipers out there it would seem:

http://tinyurl.com/9ahj85h

Posted by: HtP at October 11, 2012 02:23 PM (jx2j9)

120 How does a professional journalist write that kin of Tiger Beat garbage and not be laughed out of the profession? Oh, wait, they're all gushing Moonie idiots.

Posted by: UGAdawg at October 11, 2012 02:24 PM (WYOrt)

121

Scutter on now...

I'm going to be sick again.

Posted by: HtP at October 11, 2012 02:24 PM (jx2j9)

122 Morford lives in a completely isolated fantasy world. That joke map of "the world as seen by San Franciscans" probably overestimates the size of "JesusLand" in his mind. Every time I read anything by him I double-check to make sure it's not a parody by one of Limbaugh's buddies, or Glenn Beck or somebody. He comes across like one of their parodies. I have met actual dope-smoking robed trustafarian hippes *at Berkeley* that are more grounded in reality than he is.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 11, 2012 02:24 PM (bxiXv)

123 "Many spiritually advanced people I know (not coweringly religious, mind you, but deeply spiritual) Â…" To rephrase Yoda, Be religious or don't be religious. There is no "spiritual." Or to quote Gutfeld, being "spiritual" is like saying you won a marathon without having run it. Or to quote me, people who call themselves spiritual, while vigorously denying they are religious, are typically full of shit.

Posted by: Glen at October 11, 2012 02:25 PM (K1CbB)

124 Jesus was a Community Organizer too.

Posted by: Things ObamaZombies said in 2008 at October 11, 2012 02:26 PM (sTju8)

125 Here's some fun "name magic" for everyone: Obama, in Latin: Ob (Against e.g. obscene) Am (Love e.g. amateur) A (Feminine Suffix e.g. fashionista)

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:26 PM (QEfsO)

126

https://bitly.com/90BLmt

My all-time favorite Obama iconography: The Tupac Jesus de Chicago.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at October 11, 2012 02:27 PM (eJkKU)

127 I don't see where some people think that Scruntter is cute. It's probably some scary shit without make-up.

Posted by: Soona at October 11, 2012 02:28 PM (6szqB)

128 Michigan was "blown away" too...Thanks for nothing, Granholm.

Posted by: JustDave in GR at October 11, 2012 02:28 PM (IxA54)

129 Bret Baier is hammering Cutter. Nice.

Posted by: JackStraw at October 11, 2012 02:28 PM (TMB3S)

130

129
Scutter on now...

I'm going to be sick again.

Bret Baer is being...too polite.

Way too polite.

But he's taking her apart.

Posted by: wheatie at October 11, 2012 02:29 PM (l5RhJ)

131 137 That's a bad way to get an STD. Not worth it...

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:30 PM (QEfsO)

132

Stephanie seems amp'd up.

Kudos to Bret for it.

Posted by: concrete girl at October 11, 2012 02:31 PM (y2Ojs)

133 Bret Baier is hammering Cutter. Nice. Posted by: JackStraw at October 11, 2012 06:28 PM (TMB3S) My Lord, she is such an annoying, worthless scrunt. But she doesn't back down one bit. She even had the chutzpah to challenge Baier, "Do you think WE were politicizing this?" which Brett refused to give the only reasonable answer to. This chick is Soviet-ready.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 11, 2012 02:31 PM (X3lox)

134 I don't get it. I cannot understand the type of personality, of an American, that could feel this way.

Posted by: PJ at October 11, 2012 02:32 PM (DQHjw)

135 I don't get it. I cannot understand the type of personality, of an American, that could feel this way. Posted by: PJ at October 11, 2012 06:32 PM (DQHjw) I was thinking about this. She really doesn't seem American, at all, to me. Except for her American English, there's nothing else about her that would seem to tie her to this nation, at all. Someone should ask her if she's American.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at October 11, 2012 02:33 PM (X3lox)

136 141 She's worth a lot to Obama/"Progress."

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:34 PM (QEfsO)

137 143 Well, I don't know. She is bitchy and seems to dye her hair...

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:35 PM (QEfsO)

138 Four dead in Benghazi, blood on the Administration's hands, and nothing but lies -- and the arrest of a filmmaker-- since. Where's your Lightworker now? You simply have to believe. It's the Doug Henning Presidency.

Posted by: George Orwell what knows poor people don't know how to dress themselves at October 11, 2012 02:36 PM (mukPq)

139

..."Four dead in Benghazi..."

I keep flashing back on that old song...."Four Dead in Ohio".

Posted by: wheatie at October 11, 2012 02:37 PM (l5RhJ)

140 Yes, I certainly do remember Morford's column four years ago. I think I was already creeped out by Obama's cult of personality even before June 2008. Oh, and the correct term is "Lightbringer".

Posted by: rickl at October 11, 2012 02:38 PM (sdi6R)

141 Building a Religion: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4yvvCv79QY

Posted by: DocJ at October 11, 2012 02:39 PM (V20sy)

142 I hear Adolf Schicklgruber was quite charismatic back in his day, too. Such admirable personal traits sometimes end badly for those overly influenced by them.

Posted by: Socratease at October 11, 2012 02:39 PM (iVBDH)

143 142 I don't get it. I cannot understand the type of personality, of an American, that could feel this way. Posted by: PJ at October 11, 2012 06:32 PM (DQHjw) There are millions of leftists who resent America so much it boils over into hate. They scream like stabbed rats when you point it out, but they bash and insult and try to diminish the country at every turn, they can't go a minute without doing it (just like they can't talk about Islamic extremism without saying "but the Crusades"). Some of them get elected - some appointed, like this one.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 11, 2012 02:40 PM (bxiXv)

144 "Where's your Lightworker now?" He's busy. Very, very, busy...

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:40 PM (QEfsO)

145 Jeezus, very funny and pathetic. I hope the author didn't forget to cup the balls.

Posted by: TheNoseKnows at October 11, 2012 02:41 PM (qAMin)

146 151 But don't you know that everyone loves Amerikkka equally?

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:42 PM (QEfsO)

147 So, would it be safe to say Mark Morford doesn't identify himself as a "skeptic"?

Posted by: fb at October 11, 2012 02:43 PM (JVEmw)

148

149 Building a Religion: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4yvvCv79QY

---------

That's it....the original 'cakesecret' video.

Cool.

I thought it had been scrubbed.

It got something like 15 million hits, before Youtube made them take it down the first time.

Posted by: wheatie at October 11, 2012 02:44 PM (l5RhJ)

149 155 He probably thinks of himself as a "free critical thinker" or something.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:45 PM (QEfsO)

150 But don't you know that everyone loves Amerikkka equally? Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 06:42 PM (QEfsO) If the Songun Blog quotes you extensively...

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at October 11, 2012 02:45 PM (bxiXv)

151 This is perhaps the biggest piece of stinkin' shlock I have ever read. It's hard to believe just what weiner suckers these people were/are to him. It's so embarrassing....for them. Hilarious.

Posted by: Larry the Cable Guy at October 11, 2012 02:46 PM (lTVJy)

152 Those of us who live in Commiefornia and have witnessed the sad, sick decline of the _San Francisco Chronicle_ (and its Web site SFGate) have been listening to similar silly spew from Mark Morford for quite a while now.

He is that particular sort of metrosexual yuppie liberal who thinks that gobbling designer drugs and sleeping with everything that moves are plain proofs of a more "highly evolved" personal status. He will go in one column from talking about how ZOMG global warming from evil Republicans is murdering Gaia to, in the next column, talking about how cool his new turbo Audi is. He wants to be big on "tolerance", both of gays and also of the Muslims who consider murdering gays to be an article of faith, without being able to see that these forms of tolerance are entirely incompatible with one another.

It's really stuff that I figure to be pulling up out of the Web archives 20 years from now to show the younguns how completely bughouse nuts certain segments of blue-state America had become during this period of history.

A period of history prior, of course, to the historic final implosion of Commiefornia in 2019, about which the kids will have learned in class.

Posted by: torquewrench at October 11, 2012 02:47 PM (ymG7s)

153 158

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at October 11, 2012 02:47 PM (QEfsO)

154

I'm pretty sure I've never been 'blown away' by anyone's presence. Posted by: Tami at October 11, 2012 05:54 PM (X6akg)

Oh, c'mon, Tami. If a shirtless Paul Ryan walked into your living room and said "Hey, girl, wanna crunch my numbers?" I bet you'd be blown halfway across the damn country...

Posted by: Donna V. at October 11, 2012 02:57 PM (dcIHW)

155

Or to quote me, people who call themselves spiritual, while vigorously denying they are religious, are typically full of shit. Posted by: Glen at October 11, 2012 06:25 PM (K1CbB)

Yeah - they think they're friggin' Zen masters because they go to Yoga class twice a week.

Posted by: Donna V. at October 11, 2012 03:00 PM (dcIHW)

156

[Barack Obama isn't really one of us. Not in the normal way, anyway.

]

I agree with this part.

Posted by: Warden at October 11, 2012 03:01 PM (HzhBE)

157

"Has anybody heard that Fox will be broadcasting the Documentary 2016 this coming Sunday evening?"

Hmmm - it's still playing in theaters - my sister saw it on Monday night.

Posted by: Donna V. at October 11, 2012 03:05 PM (dcIHW)

158

Many spiritually advanced people I know (not coweringly religious, mind you, but deeply spiritual) identify Obama as a Lightworker, that rare kind of attuned being who has the ability to lead us not merely to new foreign policies or health care plans or whatnot, but who can actually help usher in a new way of being on the planet, of relating and connecting and engaging with this bizarre earthly experiment.

Pass the sick bags. Quick!

Posted by: Jay Guevara at October 11, 2012 03:46 PM (U+DUu)

159 What? Hasn't Mark Morford died in a fire yet? What's keeping him?

Posted by: vanderleun at October 11, 2012 04:49 PM (mkMov)

160 If Morford's adjectives were free toppings, you could skip the burger and still have a complete meal.

Posted by: The Chap with the App at October 11, 2012 04:59 PM (fscec)

161 Obama as a Lightworker, that rare kind of attuned being who has the ability to lead us No. King Putt wouldn't know leadership if it jumped up and bit him squarely on his ass. If he had any actual leadership skills, we'd have been in a much deeper pile of shit.

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie ® at October 12, 2012 04:56 AM (1hM1d)

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