Ace of Spades HQ

July 05, 2012

***IMPORTANT SAFETY POST***
— LauraW

More and more land is going wild in the US every day. Unpleasant human encounters with wild animals are on the rise. It's important to be prepared, and above all, to REMAIN CALM if it looks like a human vs. animal interaction is imminent.

Okay, yeah, this was an emergency filler post.

I love how the raccoon looks up when he's spoken to.

Posted by: LauraW at 06:37 AM | Comments (141)
Post contains 69 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Yeah Rocky Raccoon looks very cute. You don't want to know what one of those things can do to your dog or your baby's face. A young couple in Michigan thought it would be neato keen to keep a raccoon as a pet.

Posted by: nerdygirl at July 05, 2012 06:41 AM (d9ErJ)

2 If you can't trust Pervy Santa, who can you trust?

Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 06:41 AM (z9HTb)

3 The obesity epidemic has hit racoons too, I see. He must be in a food desert.

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 06:41 AM (jxlCy)

4 I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that I think this raccoon is not a stranger to the gentleman.

Posted by: lauraw at July 05, 2012 06:41 AM (XwElj)

5 HA HA you're right, the Raccoon does a great job in this video. Looks like he's really trying to eat that guys arm, too.

Posted by: drawandstrike at July 05, 2012 06:42 AM (G3bCl)

6 As a man who has had his ass whipped right by 'coons on multiple occaisions, I can tell you they are, as a rule, meaner than Satan. Where can I get somma that 'coon repel?

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 06:42 AM (OlN4e)

7 So people have pet coons, huh?

Posted by: Ben at July 05, 2012 06:44 AM (C2Y4l)

8 And I still maintain that "Hannah Montana" sounds like a pr0n star name.

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 06:44 AM (jxlCy)

9 8 And I still maintain that "Hannah Montana" sounds like a pr0n star name. Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 10:44 AM (jxlCy) I got a feelin someday it will be.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Team Dagny at July 05, 2012 06:44 AM (9TTOe)

10 7So people have pet coons, huh?

Posted by: Ben at July 05, 2012 10:44 AM (C2Y4l)<<<<<

Sure, if you don't mind getting your ass whipped right now and again.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 06:44 AM (OlN4e)

11 Does the coon repellent have a rabies vaccine mixed in with it?

Posted by: Dave C at July 05, 2012 06:46 AM (2HxZw)

It's important to be prepared, and above all, to REMAIN CALM if it looks like a human vs. animal interaction is imminent.

Remain calm & SQUEEZE the trigger. Not yank it.

Posted by: rickb223 at July 05, 2012 06:47 AM (zji3t)

13 In-laws en route for a 4 day visit. Ugh.

Posted by: Lincolntf at July 05, 2012 06:47 AM (HethX)

14 I had several raccoons as pets, back when it was legal (illegal now due to rabies). The thing to remember is, coons are MUCH smarter than you. Don't even try your stupid human shit on them. You do have to be very careful of them as they get older. Don't startle them. Also, lock up your liquor...they're prone to alcoholism, given half a chance.

Posted by: S. Weasel at July 05, 2012 06:48 AM (6T7XU)

15 My grandpa had a pet racoon for a long time but eventually he had to get rid of it because it bit the mailman.

Posted by: entropy at July 05, 2012 06:48 AM (TULs6)

16 So Lauraw, it has come to this.

Posted by: Velvet Ambition at July 05, 2012 06:48 AM (mFxQX)

17 The obesity epidemic has hit racoons too, I see. He must be in a food desert.

He probably needs more sugar in his diet.

Posted by: RJ at July 05, 2012 06:48 AM (z9HTb)

18 I wonder if Hanna makes a male chimpanzee repellant? I know a woman who could have used some.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 06:48 AM (OlN4e)

Racoons are smart and viscious. They can, on occasion, be domesticated. This one is a pet, you can tell by how well groomed it is. And racoons are not that afraid of people. They are all over the neighborhood that I live in. As are skunks, foxes, and I think we also have a few coyotes around.

One of my cats is just like that - she bites lightly to show her affection.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes..... at July 05, 2012 06:48 AM (RFeQD)

20 Abolish the USPS and legalize racoons.

Posted by: entropy at July 05, 2012 06:49 AM (TULs6)

Pippi Mississippi was taken.

Posted by: Hal Burton at July 05, 2012 06:51 AM (iYvMQ)

22 He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions. http://tinyurl.com/877m3zt See what I did there??

Posted by: DAve at July 05, 2012 06:51 AM (h+/7G)

23 Racist!!

Posted by: A One-Eyed Cat Peepin' in the Seafood Store at July 05, 2012 06:52 AM (eMtQ2)

24 Now I know I heard him say "coon" this time.

Posted by: ABC Reporter at July 05, 2012 06:53 AM (AqaMO)

25 On a particular fishing trip in NH long ago we found out raccoons love nightcrawlers and none of us had the balls to do anything about it.

Posted by: eman at July 05, 2012 06:53 AM (ejmiE)

26 Does it work on bears?

Posted by: Timothy Treadwell at July 05, 2012 06:53 AM (6j180)

27 Mona Arizona.

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 06:53 AM (jxlCy)

28 Racoons have an air of "don't give a fuck" about them.

Posted by: Hal Burton at July 05, 2012 06:54 AM (iYvMQ)

29 With the power out going on day 6, and about 60 percent of the city's households having to empty their fridges, our wonderful city fathers have decided that for the next week they will only pick up the brush piles, not the rotting garbage that has been sitting in 90plus degree heat for the week. I look forward to seeing all kinds of wildlife around the house now since there are no lights to keep them away.

Posted by: MrCaniac at July 05, 2012 06:54 AM (1grxW)

30 27 Does it work on bears?

Posted by: Timothy Treadwell at July 05, 2012 10:53 AM (6j180)

Nope, just pisses us off. As you well know!

Posted by: Bears at July 05, 2012 06:55 AM (RD7QR)

31 Timothy Treadwell is a weathered pile of Grizz poop up north. So is his girlfriend. Bears don't tolerate stupidity well.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 06:56 AM (OlN4e)

32 On a particular fishing trip in NH long ago we found out raccoons love nightcrawlers and none of us had the balls to do anything about it.

Have I said recently how much I love the comments at this place? Cuz I do. Right up there with the main posts.

Posted by: Jay in Ames at July 05, 2012 06:56 AM (UEEex)

33 Zimmerman should have had this rather than a gun

Posted by: ABC Reporter at July 05, 2012 06:57 AM (AqaMO)

34 Posted by: eman at July 05, 2012 10:53 AM (ejmiE)

That's what .22 pistols are for.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo (NJConservative) at July 05, 2012 06:57 AM (nEUpB)

35 19 Racoons are smart and viscious. They can, on occasion, be domesticated. This one is a pet, you can tell by how well groomed it is. And racoons are not that afraid of people. They are all over the neighborhood thatI live in. As are skunks, foxes, and I think we also have a few coyotes around. One of my cats is just like that - she bites lightly to show her affection. Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes..... at July 05, 2012 10:48 AM (RFeQD) Sounds like your 'coons need to be shot more often. Nasty creatures. Definitely not to be messed with.

Posted by: blindside at July 05, 2012 06:57 AM (x7g7t)

36 He spent his ZZ Top fortune on a raccoon?

Posted by: Cicero at July 05, 2012 06:57 AM (6j180)

37 23 Weird. I found a baby opossum in my drivway last night. It looked like it may have been dropped by mama during transport. My wife wanted me to take it in but I figured it would be best to wrap it in a towel and leave it out and hope mama comes back. I guess I should go check the towel.
Momma won't come back. She doesn't even know she dropped it. (Part time wildlife rehabber)

Posted by: rickb223 at July 05, 2012 06:58 AM (zji3t)

38 He didn't say "raccoon attacks", he said "raccoon, a tax".

Posted by: J. Roberts, Esq. at July 05, 2012 06:58 AM (KWzDA)

39 Still day 3 of 10 day the produce juice diet. Hallucinations should be kicking in soon.

Posted by: Hal Burton at July 05, 2012 06:58 AM (iYvMQ)

40 >>>>Timothy Treadwell is a weathered pile of Grizz poop up north. So is his girlfriend.
Bears don't tolerate stupidity well.

Wiki calls him an 'Amateur Naturalist".

That much was evident.

Posted by: Dave C at July 05, 2012 06:59 AM (2HxZw)

41 Does it work on bulldozers?

Posted by: Rachel Corrie at July 05, 2012 06:59 AM (KWzDA)

42 A raccoon ate my baby!

Posted by: Lindy Chamberlain at July 05, 2012 06:59 AM (evdj2)

43 41 Still day 3 of 10 day the produce juice diet. Hallucinations should be kicking in soon.

Posted by: Hal Burton at July 05, 2012 10:58 AM (iYvMQ)

If the cucumbers turn on you and attack it might be time to have some meat.

Posted by: joncelli, heartless Con and all around unpleasant guy at July 05, 2012 06:59 AM (RD7QR)

44 santa has raccoons?

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 06:59 AM (Ho2rs)

45 Does it work on muslim men?

Posted by: A Goat at July 05, 2012 07:00 AM (6j180)

46 Posted by: Rachel Corrie at July 05, 2012 10:59 AM (KWzDA)

Well, that joke fell flat.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo (NJConservative) at July 05, 2012 07:00 AM (nEUpB)

Posted by: rickb223 at July 05, 2012 10:58 AM (zji3t) <<<<<<

Not surprising. 'possoms have the mental acumen of an ice cube.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 07:00 AM (OlN4e)

48 13 In-laws en route for a 4 day visit. Ugh. Posted by: Lincolntf at July 05, 2012 10:47 AM (HethX) Have you considered spraying your driveway with "Hannah Mount-tana Coon Repellent"? I hear it comes in "My Little Pony Strawberry" scent now...

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:00 AM (136wp)

49 raccoons......isn't that a racist word?

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:00 AM (Ho2rs)

50 You jest but there are live bears wandering wild in areas of Detroit. Cougars come down to the outlying park areas in Oregon. The hunting laws and animal protection rules are making it unsafe for humans, again.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at July 05, 2012 07:00 AM (r4wIV)

51 santa has raccoons?

Bain suggested outsourcing to them - cheaper than elves.

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 07:01 AM (jxlCy)

52 Posted by: Rachel Corrie at July 05, 2012 10:59 AM (KWzDA)

Well, that joke fell flat.

The road to hell is paved with Rachel Corrie.

Posted by: Cicero at July 05, 2012 07:01 AM (6j180)

The thing to remember is, coons are MUCH smarter than you.

And smarter than the average bear. Why do you think he's called "Boo-Boo?"

Posted by: Yogi Bear at July 05, 2012 07:01 AM (zF6Iw)

54 i love that commercial with the kids in the yard with the possum ......

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:01 AM (Ho2rs)

55 29 Racoons have an air of "don't give a fuck" about them. These words are so very true. I think it's the posture.

Posted by: lauraw at July 05, 2012 07:01 AM (XwElj)

56 There's some nice videos on youtube depicting the raconification of Moochie.

Posted by: Hal Burton at July 05, 2012 07:01 AM (iYvMQ)

57 That's FDS not body spray you ol' coot.

Posted by: Hannah Montana at July 05, 2012 07:02 AM (AqaMO)

58 Who hasn't seen hanna Montana's coon?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at July 05, 2012 07:02 AM (05RcU)

59 Never trust a creature that wears a mask.

Posted by: toby928© at July 05, 2012 07:02 AM (evdj2)

60 48 Posted by: Rachel Corrie at July 05, 2012 10:59 AM (KWzDA) Well, that joke fell flat. Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo (NJConservative) at July 05, 2012 11:00 AM (nEUpB) You have to give it time to spread...

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:02 AM (136wp)

61 btw...i currently have a baby rattler in my garage....it's hiding under all the baseball equipment.....spent an hour last night looking for it and about 1/2 an hour this morning.....i'll have to get my rattler killing gear on and hunt that mfer down......

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:03 AM (Ho2rs)

62 A raccoon once bit my sister. I know. Not as cool as a moose.
But we don't have meese in Texas. (Goose - geese. Moose - meese?)

Posted by: rickb223 at July 05, 2012 07:03 AM (zji3t)

63 You jest but there are live bears wandering wild in areas of Detroit.

Do they have a bear hunting season in New Jersey? They should.

Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 07:04 AM (z9HTb)

64 63 btw...i currently have a baby rattler in my garage....it's hiding under all the baseball equipment.....spent an hour last night looking for it and about 1/2 an hour this morning.....i'll have to get my rattler killing gear on and hunt that mfer down...... Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 11:03 AM (Ho2rs) Could be a small nest?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Team Dagny at July 05, 2012 07:04 AM (9TTOe)

65 We've had racoons in the attic playing with the kids toys, and I swear I've seen racoons on my roof the size of buffalo. My stupid mutt will try and bite the head off of a skunk, but he keeps his distance from racoons.

Posted by: April 12, 1861 at July 05, 2012 07:04 AM (IVoJS)

66 Coons have the air of "don't give a fuck" because they don't give a fuck.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 07:04 AM (OlN4e)

67 64 A raccoon once bit my sister. I know. Not as cool as a moose.But we don't have meese in Texas. (Goose - geese. Moose - meese?) Posted by: rickb223 at July 05, 2012 11:03 AM (zji3t) I hate those meeses to pieces

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:04 AM (136wp)

Didn't Santa get the fuckin' memo? THE GUYS GET SHIRTS!

Where's Joe?

Posted by: Paul Anka at July 05, 2012 07:05 AM (zF6Iw)

69 I have a friend with a pet raccoon. Little bastard is smart, once locked my friend in his cage by baiting him with a flashlight. Friend notices flashlight shining in cage, crawls in to get it, coon is waiting and shuts the door behind him. He was in there for three hours, until his roommate got home.

The coon also has a love of cell phones. My friend always reminds people visiting not to leave theirs laying about, or it will end up being washed in the pool and then cached away somewhere. He's lost about a half dozen that way.

Posted by: Country Singer at July 05, 2012 07:05 AM (L8r/r)

70 @ 64 It's called a flock of moosen!

Posted by: Sophistahick at July 05, 2012 07:05 AM (AqaMO)

71 65 You jest but there are live bears wandering wild in areas of Detroit. Do they have a bear hunting season in New Jersey? They should. Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 11:04 AM (z9HTb) Yep, they do have a bear hunting season. Of course, the OuterLibLandians protested against it...

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:05 AM (136wp)

72 Anyone who is around raccoons should be warned that their feces can contain Raccoon Roundworm eggs - a nasty parasitical disease.

Posted by: x123 at July 05, 2012 07:06 AM (67n4t)

73 This, from a smart military blog?

Posted by: Jones in CO at July 05, 2012 07:06 AM (8sCoq)

74 Before white man come, my people lived in harmony with the land, following great raccoon herd across the plains.

Posted by: Elizabeth Three Wolf Moon Warren at July 05, 2012 07:06 AM (6j180)

75 69 I went and checked the towel and it wasn't there. Then as I was walking back I saw it walking around in the veg. At least I think it's the same one. It looks like the one from last night but it's much more active. I think I'll leave it to nature to decide. Posted by: runninrebel at July 05, 2012 11:04 AM (N/1Dm) Thanks for keeping my snack warm!

Posted by: Your Friendly Neighborhood Racoon at July 05, 2012 07:07 AM (136wp)

76 oldsailor no.....it was seen slithering in last night as we were heading out to set off our fireworks........

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:07 AM (Ho2rs)

77 From all these descriptions, raccoons sound kinda like Honey Badger Lite.

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 07:07 AM (jxlCy)

78 i'll have to get my rattler killing gear on and hunt that mfer down......

Where's a honey badger when you need one?

Posted by: grognard, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:08 AM (NS2Mo)

79 My stupid mutt will try and bite the head off of a skunk, but he keeps his distance from racoons.

Posted by: April 12, 1861 at July 05, 2012 11:04 AM (IVoJS)

================

He's not so stupid.

Posted by: Tami at July 05, 2012 07:08 AM (X6akg)

80 Is a safety post like a safety dance?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 05, 2012 07:09 AM (1Jaio)

81 Anyone who is around raccoons should be warned that their feces can contain Raccoon Roundworm eggs - a nasty parasitical disease.

Posted by: x123 at July 05, 2012 11:06 AM (67n4t)

-----

Was already planning on immediately amputating any part of my body that comes in contact with racoon feces.

Posted by: Hal Burton at July 05, 2012 07:10 AM (iYvMQ)

82 If hippy Santa was a garbage can, that coon spray would be nothing more than seasoning.

Posted by: Fritz at July 05, 2012 07:10 AM (/ZZCn)

83 gronard.....i'm wondering why my husband didn't just take care of it......he's the one who saw it.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:10 AM (Ho2rs)

84 65 You jest but there are live bears wandering wild in areas of Detroit. At least there are not dead bears wandering wild. Or are there?

Posted by: eman at July 05, 2012 07:10 AM (ejmiE)

85 81 i'll have to get my rattler killing gear on and hunt that mfer down...... Oh please, give us a gear breakdown. I'm dying to know what that looks like.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Team Dagny at July 05, 2012 07:10 AM (9TTOe)

86 A safety post an OSHA standard.

Posted by: Sophistahick at July 05, 2012 07:11 AM (AqaMO)

87 83 Is a safety post like a safety dance? Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 05, 2012 11:09 AM (1Jaio) Um, no. Because, you can dance if you want to. The post you get if you want it or not.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Team Dagny at July 05, 2012 07:12 AM (9TTOe)

Bear spray is a necessity for these encounters:

http://tinyurl.com/cco7nck

Posted by: Erica at July 05, 2012 07:12 AM (X7atB)

89 Yep, they do have a bear hunting season. Of course, the OuterLibLandians protested against it...

Looked it up. 592 taken in 2010, 469 in 2011. Maybe the bears are retreating.

Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 07:12 AM (z9HTb)

90 76 This, from a smart military blog? Posted by: Jones in CO at July 05, 2012 11:06 AM (8sCoq) http://tinyurl.com/cz6xofj [PIC] ok, test, Identify this gun (because I have no idea what it is)

Posted by: Your Friendly Neighborhood Racoon at July 05, 2012 07:13 AM (136wp)

"Does it work on bears?"

Coon repellent does nothing to me. Poon, however, is *disgusting*.

Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at July 05, 2012 07:13 AM (6T8Ay)

92 Looked it up. 592 taken in 2010, 469 in 2011. Maybe the bears are retreating.

Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 11:12 AM (z9HTb)

Christie is formidable competition for food.

Posted by: Tami at July 05, 2012 07:14 AM (X6akg)

93 i'm wondering why my husband didn't just take care of it......he's the one who saw it.....

He's a guy. If he didn't need whatever the snake is on/next to, then it's not hurting anything.

Posted by: grognard, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:14 AM (NS2Mo)

94 NJ bears hang out at the shore and call each other Tony.

Posted by: eman at July 05, 2012 07:15 AM (ejmiE)

95 93 Yep, they do have a bear hunting season. Of course, the OuterLibLandians protested against it... Looked it up. 592 taken in 2010, 469 in 2011. Maybe the bears are retreating. Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 11:12 AM (z9HTb) They would like us to think that... Double the guard on picnik baskets...

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:16 AM (136wp)

96 At least there are not dead bears wandering wild.

Or are there? Posted by: eman at July 05, 2012 11:10 AM

Nope.

Posted by: zombear at July 05, 2012 07:16 AM (bAGA/)

97 OT: Drudge picked up the ObamaTax nickname.

Posted by: Thingamajig at July 05, 2012 07:16 AM (fD1lX)

98
i'll have to get my rattler killing gear on and hunt that mfer down......

Where's a honey badger when you need one?

Posted by: grognard, team dagny at July 05, 2012 11:08 AM (NS2Mo)

Meh. Call me when you got cobra.

Posted by: Honey Badger at July 05, 2012 07:17 AM (TIIx5)

99 >Oh please, give us a gear breakdown. I'm dying to know what that looks like.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Team Dagny at July 05, 2012 11:10 AM (9TTOe)

First, go to Walgreens and get a can of Hannah Montana Rattlesnake Repellant

Posted by: Jones in CO at July 05, 2012 07:17 AM (8sCoq)

100 95 "Does it work on bears?"
Coon repellent does nothing to me. Poon, however, is *disgusting*. Agreed.

Posted by: Anderson Cooper at July 05, 2012 07:17 AM (zji3t)

101 Bear spray is a necessity for these encounters:

Go Mama-san!

Posted by: fluffy at July 05, 2012 07:17 AM (z9HTb)

102 I put motion sensing lights over the trash cans. Kept finding them turned off, and I would yell at the kids. Caught a coon flipping the switch.

Posted by: Jean at July 05, 2012 07:17 AM (liPvR)

103 >[PIC] ok, test, Identify this gun (because I have no idea what it is)

Posted by: Your Friendly Neighborhood Racoon at July 05, 2012 11:13 AM (136wp)

Me neither, but it looks like a bitch to clean

Posted by: Jones in CO at July 05, 2012 07:18 AM (8sCoq)

104 106 95 "Does it work on bears?" Coon repellent does nothing to me. Poon, however, is *disgusting*. Agreed. Posted by: Anderson Cooper at July 05, 2012 11:17 AM (zji3t) Seconded

Posted by: Generic Bwarney Frank Reply at July 05, 2012 07:18 AM (136wp)

105 Phoenixgirl, you don't really need equipment to hunt rattlers. I used to catch them with my hands. Not too difficult, but you must be quick.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 07:18 AM (OlN4e)

106 shorts and cowboy boots.....gloves and long sleeve shirt......and then the beheading tool......the cloppers......i don't know what it's real name is.....it's the tree branch cutting thingy ....works great......

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:19 AM (Ho2rs)

107 19 . . . One of my cats is just like that - she bites lightly to show her affection.
*
*
So does my Siberian cat, who is nicknamed Tubby D. Purebred. I've been trying to extinguish that behavior by not giving him the chance to do it to me. So far, no luck.

Of the three sure-enough Siberians I've known, two have been prickly and one was sickly. Good cats, basically -- but I'm thinking Maine Coon or a good old-fashioned mix next time.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at July 05, 2012 07:19 AM (exvgC)

108 maddogg.....you are my hero.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 07:19 AM (Ho2rs)

109

Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 07:20 AM (KXm42)

110 http://tinyurl.com/7ow5onb [PIC] Check out this picture of the Chinese astronauts. Sitting in garden chairs with flower bouquets. I can't imagine Alan Shepard or Gus Grissom doing this after a mission.

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:20 AM (136wp)

111 shorts and cowboy boots.....gloves and long sleeve shirt......and then the beheading tool......the cloppers......i don't know what it's real name is.....it's the tree branch cutting thingy ....works great......

Assless chaps are strongly recommended while rattlesnake hunting. And pictures. Lots of pictures.

Posted by: Cicero at July 05, 2012 07:20 AM (6j180)

112 112 shorts and cowboy boots.....gloves and long sleeve shirt......and then the beheading tool......the cloppers......i don't know what it's real name is.....it's the tree branch cutting thingy ....works great...... Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 11:19 AM (Ho2rs) I was hoping for a I dream of Jenie costume. With the "Cloppers" of course.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Team Dagny at July 05, 2012 07:20 AM (9TTOe)

113 92 Bear spray is a necessity for these encounters: http://tinyurl.com/cco7nck Posted by: Erica at July 05, 2012 11:12 AM (X7atB) Do not piss off the wife....

Posted by: cajun carrot at July 05, 2012 07:21 AM (UZQM8)

114 Well, that joke fell flat.

Yeah, I was really scraping the bottom of the barrel.

Posted by: Ward of the State at July 05, 2012 07:21 AM (KWzDA)

115 That wasn't a raccoon it was a democrat congresscritter. They're easily confused in more ways than one.

Same thing holds true about them biting.

Posted by: ontherocks at July 05, 2012 07:21 AM (aZ6ew)

116 shorts and cowboy boots.....gloves and long sleeve shirt......and then the beheading tool......the cloppers......i don't know what it's real name is.....it's the tree branch cutting thingy ....works great......

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 11:19 AM (Ho2rs)

============

This is why your husband didn't take care of it.

Posted by: Tami at July 05, 2012 07:21 AM (X6akg)

117 115 Phoenixgirl, you don't really need equipment to hunt rattlers. I used to shotcatch them with my crossbow hands. Not too difficult, but you must be quick. FIFY Posted by: Mallamutt, RINO President for Life at July 05, 2012 11:20 AM (OWjjx) Longbow

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:21 AM (136wp)

118 shorts and cowboy boots

Bunk!

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 07:22 AM (jxlCy)

119 My exwife was bit by a rattlesnake. It was horrible. The poor thing. Then, mercifully, a few minutes later, the snake died.

Posted by: eman at July 05, 2012 07:24 AM (ejmiE)

120 http://tinyurl.com/7em4f7p [PIC] NSFW - language. Love the sentiment.

Posted by: The Huggable Robot Devil at July 05, 2012 07:24 AM (136wp)

121 "8 And I still maintain that "Hannah Montana" sounds like a pr0n star name.
Posted by: Waterhouse at July 05, 2012 10:44 AM (jxlCy)

I got a feelin someday it will be."

Nah,...she'll be divorced multiples though.

Had a coon trapped in my attic once. Sounded liked like Satan vs. chulthu (I spell it how I like). Wouldn't go near one of those those things with Steve Irwin's dick.

Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 07:25 AM (KXm42)

122 I chased down and caught a badger once. Turned him loose pretty quick. Snatching screech owls off their purch is not recommended either.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 07:26 AM (OlN4e)

123 THREAD WINNER! No really, why not. If you had eleven at post 116, go to the pay window and collect your money.

I'm shy before my first cup. Still can't figure out what gotdam button does that.

Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 07:27 AM (KXm42)

124 129 Wouldn't go near one of those those things with Steve Irwin's dick.
Hmmmmm.

Posted by: Anderson Cooper at July 05, 2012 07:28 AM (zji3t)

125 Think of it as content free commenting.

Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 07:28 AM (KXm42)

126 My grandpop used to have a pet raccoon, who just hated FDR's depression era fireside chats on Television. So, he got rid of the raccoon. Not the Television...see what I'm getting at? Try to tell that story to a republican . THEY JUST WON'T GET IT! It's a depression folks, we can't afford to outsource this to Romney and his weird mormon friends.

Posted by: J Biden VP & very smart individual at July 05, 2012 07:29 AM (4eNxd)

127 Did I slayeth your nice little thread with ny morning breath?

Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 07:30 AM (KXm42)

128 Garden hose works on small rattlers, cool them down till they get slow, then get them with the shovel.

Posted by: Jean at July 05, 2012 07:30 AM (liPvR)

129

Assless chaps.

BUNK! Oh, wait. . .

Posted by: Andy Sullivan at July 05, 2012 07:31 AM (zF6Iw)

130 I'm of the opinion that rattlers should not be killed until they are of eating size. 3 feet or so, minimum. A 6 footer makes a good meal for 3 men if you have side dishes. But only two if one is a teenager.

Posted by: maddogg at July 05, 2012 07:33 AM (OlN4e)

131 Garden hose works on small rattlers, cool them down till they get slow, then get them with the shovel.

Alternatively, you could drop a bag of ice on it, and then go in and ask your husband to please bring that heavy bag of ice in from the garage for me darling.

Posted by: lauraw at July 05, 2012 07:35 AM (XwElj)

132 Garden hose works on small rattlers, cool them down till they get slow, then get them with the shovel.

I found out if you have one of those pesky flies buzzing you at the bathroom sink in the morning, water is an effective projectile. Get em wet so they can't fly and squash em. That's my Martha Stewart tip o the day.

Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 07:35 AM (KXm42)

133 water is an effective projectile. Get em wet so they can't fly and squash em. That's my Martha Stewart tip o the day. Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 11:35 AM (KXm42) If one of my cat's catch them, they eat em

Posted by: Nevergiveup at July 05, 2012 07:38 AM (05RcU)

134 shorts and cowboy boots.....gloves and long sleeve shirt......and then the beheading tool......the cloppers.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 05, 2012 11:19 AM (Ho2rs)

Hey, how you doin'?

Posted by: Uncledave at July 05, 2012 07:50 AM (nJ32z)

135 I was enjoying the view, from a bluff overlooking the river, following a rain storm one evening.
The dog was sniffing a bush about 2 feet away when a rattlesnake struck at him. The dog yelped and jumped back.
I thought the dog got hit so I clobbered the snake with a rock and chopped his head off with my Bear Claw. (Found out later the dog was not hit.)
I took the rattle too and used to shake it at the dog, He would go nuts every time.
Cheap entertainment.

Posted by: The Snakist at July 05, 2012 07:50 AM (I7O5y)

136 The old 8N decided it was to hot after about an hour and quit on me,>>

Hell I'm goin on 70 yrs old what do you expect?

Posted by: The old 8N at July 05, 2012 07:57 AM (tf9Ne)

137 I heard Miley Cyrus speak for the first time. One, she has a lisp. Two, she sounds like she smokes a carton for cigs a day.

Posted by: Redd at July 05, 2012 08:04 AM (suLy7)

138 I can see why the coon is biting him...he sat in the coon's chair. The coon was their first.

Posted by: Redd at July 05, 2012 08:05 AM (suLy7)

139 141 water is an effective projectile. Get em wet so they can't fly and squash em. That's my Martha Stewart tip o the day.
Posted by: eleven at July 05, 2012 11:35 AM (KXm42)
*
If one of my cat's catch them, they eat em
*
*
I had a big red Maine Coon who thought of big roaches as hors d'oeuvres. The little ones were beneath his notice, but the large ones, he'd play with 'em for a while (slap! slap!) until they were staggering, then crunch crunch crunch. I tried to take one away from him at first, thinking they were bad for cats. He growled at me. So I said, "Okay, cat, get sick, see if I care."

He lived to be 16, so maybe it was just good protein.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at July 05, 2012 08:44 AM (exvgC)

140 my bully-dog will chase, kill and eat any buzzing insects, including wasps and hornets. I think she likes the wasps because they're spicy. But moths and butterflies she leaves alone. Also had a golden retriever growing up that absolutely loved june bugs...the big juicy ones especially. gross.

Posted by: model_1066 at July 05, 2012 01:25 PM (YbQJm)

141 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at July 05, 2012 01:46 PM (Xb3hu)

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