Ace of Spades HQ

May 04, 2012

Michael Moore Becomes a Triple Threat, Incompetent In Three Different Arts
— Ace

Singing, now.

Here's Michael Moore's very bad version of "The Times They Are A-Changin'." This is just not terribly good at all.

You can also sample the official studio track.

Posted by: Ace at 04:55 PM | Comments (131)
Post contains 52 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Michael Moore gives his 'talent' because he ain't gonna give up his cash.

He's better than us.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 04:58 PM (MMC8r)

2 He sounds like he's trying to channel the Chad Mitchell Trio.

Posted by: mama winger at May 04, 2012 04:58 PM (P6QsQ)

3 I guess the hipsters assumed that because the original vocals suck, it would be okay to do a cover with crappy vocals too. Fuck you, hobo hipsters!

Posted by: wooga at May 04, 2012 05:00 PM (vjyZP)

4 Will he put out a diet book next?

Posted by: fluffy at May 04, 2012 05:00 PM (z9HTb)

5 "I believe no ... I believe not."

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at May 04, 2012 05:00 PM (ebPtk)

The times are a changing? Lets fucking hope!

Posted by: Jack at May 04, 2012 05:00 PM (zKFOT)

7 Speaking of monsters, Grimm is coming on now.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 04, 2012 05:00 PM (piMMO)

8
For a second I thought the headline read: " Michale Moore eats three triple bacon cheeseburgers.

Posted by: YIKES! at May 04, 2012 05:01 PM (eXigD)

9 His break dancing is better.

Posted by: eman at May 04, 2012 05:07 PM (XrDou)

10 Something bad must have happened to Ace, for him to visit this particular sin upon his faithful.

Must not have gotten enough wampum in the tip jar.

Posted by: Feynmangroupie at May 04, 2012 05:07 PM (oI744)

11 I think I'm gonna go with no. Not listening. Is that okay? Because I'm going with no.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at May 04, 2012 05:07 PM (bxiXv)

12
If he does a live performance I to see him jump off the stage into the audience call it the Tunguska finale.

Posted by: YIKES! at May 04, 2012 05:08 PM (eXigD)

13 I'd rather listen to Jabba the Hut sing 'Mandy.'

But how would I know the difference?

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:11 PM (MMC8r)

14 Hmm, he has a 1/32nd of the necessary talent. We should sign him!

Posted by: Harvard School of Fine Arts at May 04, 2012 05:11 PM (FcR7P)

15 He'll do this good deed to save his soul but all he really wants is to see his dick just one more time before he dies.

Posted by: Beto at May 04, 2012 05:12 PM (lpWVn)

16 What's the Album for? They wouldn't have made it to make money, would they?

Posted by: lowandslow at May 04, 2012 05:12 PM (GZitp)

17 Michael Moore is so fat that when he occupies the Wall Street, he really occupies the Wall Street.

Posted by: Zombie Henny Youngman at May 04, 2012 05:13 PM (t28jU)

18 his great-great-great-great-great Grandmother was a singer so he's valid

Posted by: Beto at May 04, 2012 05:13 PM (lpWVn)

19 I made it thirty seconds, no worse then any wannabe folk singer with a guitar, but that ain't saying much

Posted by: lowandslow at May 04, 2012 05:14 PM (GZitp)

20 His shoes? Bruno Magli Squatch Design

Posted by: Beto at May 04, 2012 05:15 PM (lpWVn)

21
Some titles off the album
When Belt Buckle Breaks
The A Moon Pie On The Rise
Dirty Fat Rolls Clean Dirt Cheap

Posted by: YIKES! at May 04, 2012 05:15 PM (eXigD)

22 "He sounds like he's trying to channel the Chad Mitchell Trio."

And he looks like he ate them.

Posted by: meekrob at May 04, 2012 05:15 PM (x2CNJ)

23 There's A Moon Pie On The Rise

Posted by: YIKES! at May 04, 2012 05:16 PM (eXigD)

24 The only post where it would have been an asset to be Rick Rolled to the London Boys.

Posted by: lowandslow at May 04, 2012 05:17 PM (GZitp)

25 Occupy album, eh? I didn't realize it cost anything to rape women and poo on police cars. Who knew. But then, who's going to buy the album, occupoopers? They'll have to have a fundraiser to pay for it, thus someone else will have to put out an album, and..... Maybe they'll create a vortex and all fall in.

Posted by: BurtTC at May 04, 2012 05:19 PM (Gc/Qi)

26 A Mighty Wind II.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:20 PM (MMC8r)

27
I wonder if there's going to be a big group sing along like the "We Are the World" or "Do They Know It's Christmas"?

Posted by: YIKES! at May 04, 2012 05:20 PM (eXigD)

28 Figures that no-talent Marxist anal wart Tom Morello is on this album.

Posted by: meekrob at May 04, 2012 05:20 PM (x2CNJ)

OMFG - that's just...hmm...what's the word...horrendous? That guy(s) has some nerve being that bad and recording a song that's intended to be sold for money.

And where is Mooch? She should be deriding Moore for being morbidly obese.

Occupy this Album - free bag of crap with every order!

Posted by: SilverGTP at May 04, 2012 05:20 PM (MnSRY)

30 He's a dick, but he is putting my kids through college.

Posted by: Donny of Donny's Donuts at May 04, 2012 05:21 PM (z9HTb)

31 If there is anything anarchists and occupoopers love, it's '60s protest music. City governments ought to provide it for them at jet engine levels wherever they gather. Or opera. It's the friendly, supportive thing to do.

Posted by: huerfano at May 04, 2012 05:22 PM (bAGA/)

32 Micheal Moore was the reason those kids in Ethiopia were starving.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:22 PM (MMC8r)

33 GIGANTIC HORROR SINGER

Posted by: BurtTC at May 04, 2012 05:22 PM (Gc/Qi)

34 He should finish with a brick to the face.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:22 PM (MMC8r)

35 Does he really think he's going to inspire kids with 50 yr old baby boomer songs?

Posted by: fozzy at May 04, 2012 05:23 PM (FEzSe)

36 He'd go into music and wind up like Whitney Houston, except he can't fit in a bathtub.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:23 PM (MMC8r)

37 I think you are all being very critical and unfair. That performance was almost as good as Cuban health care.

Posted by: Hummingbird at May 04, 2012 05:23 PM (R5yLq)

38 Where's that drum scum dude when you need him?

Posted by: BurtTC at May 04, 2012 05:24 PM (Gc/Qi)

39 But my thighs, they are a'chafin'....

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:24 PM (MMC8r)

40 He sells this?

He's making money off a "smash capitalism" movement?

If he wasn't such a commie piece of shit, I might admire that.

Posted by: Radish A. Radish at May 04, 2012 05:25 PM (hO8IJ)

41 Odious B.I.G.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:25 PM (MMC8r)

42 cats f*cking sounds about the same---maybe better

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at May 04, 2012 05:25 PM (Dll6b)

43 The end of Braveheart is great. Fucking Robert the Fucking Bruce at fucking Bannockburn? Hells yeah!

Posted by: meekrob at May 04, 2012 05:26 PM (x2CNJ)

44 All I heard was a beeping sound, then I realized he was backing up.

Posted by: nickless at May 04, 2012 05:27 PM (MMC8r)

45 Matter of fact, he pretty much keeps the whole town employed, here at the food court.

Posted by: Donny of Donny's Donuts in North Star, MI at May 04, 2012 05:28 PM (z9HTb)

46 I think it was the "gather round people" part that really hit home. Groovy.

Posted by: Barack at May 04, 2012 05:28 PM (BEUA4)

47 A more appropriate song for the OWS crowd would have been Jocko Homo, sung with total obliviousness.

Posted by: CAC at May 04, 2012 05:28 PM (vzDUu)

48 When people gather 'round Mikey the Hutt, they really gather ROUND.

Posted by: meekrob at May 04, 2012 05:29 PM (x2CNJ)

49 The famous falling bear from last week is dead. Walked into traffic, I guess it was really a suicidal bear.

Posted by: fozzy at May 04, 2012 05:30 PM (FEzSe)

50 I think it was the "gather round people" part that really hit home. Groovy. Posted by: Barack at May 04, 2012 09:28 PM (BEUA4) Except it implies "gathering people" around this fat bastard, and we all know that every man woman and child on earth holding hands in a gigantic circle wouldn't approach a fifth of this man's circumference. Also, he's a big fat fuck.

Posted by: CAC at May 04, 2012 05:30 PM (vzDUu)

51 Oops, forgot the link.

The famous falling bear from last week is dead. Walked into traffic, I guess it was really a suicidal bear.

http://tinyurl.com/6p7ohnx

Posted by: fozzy at May 04, 2012 05:30 PM (FEzSe)

52 Hands Across Michael Moore?

Posted by: meekrob at May 04, 2012 05:31 PM (x2CNJ)

53 A more appropriate song for the OWS crowd would have been Jocko Homo, sung with total obliviousness.

Heh.

"Won't Get Fooled Again" is a good revolutionary anthem.

Posted by: fluffy knows the lyrics at May 04, 2012 05:31 PM (z9HTb)

54 Hands Across Michael Moore? Posted by: meekrob at May 04, 2012 09:31 PM (x2CNJ) Again, not enough people to reach. The man is responsible for the earth's tilted axis. We are talking massive. Like a brown drawf, except 99.9999999999% lipids.

Posted by: CAC at May 04, 2012 05:33 PM (vzDUu)

55 32 He's a dick, but he is putting my kids through college.

Posted by: Donny of Donny's Donuts at May 04, 2012 09:21 PM (z9HTb)

------------------------------

Yeah, mine too.

Posted by: The K in KY Jelly at May 04, 2012 05:33 PM (uRumV)

56 Is competitive eating an art? I'm sure Moore's good at that one. Michael Moore is the boogeyman that all mama donuts tell the misbehaving baby donuts about to scare them at night.

Posted by: UGAdawg at May 04, 2012 05:34 PM (WYOrt)

57 I believe in cock.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:34 PM (x2CNJ)

58 "Won't Get Fooled Again" is a good revolutionary anthem. Posted by: fluffy knows the lyrics at May 04, 2012 09:31 PM (z9HTb) FREEDOM OF CHOICE also works. Implies their true desires.

Posted by: CAC at May 04, 2012 05:35 PM (vzDUu)

59 Posted by: YIKES! at May 04, 2012 09:01 PM (eXigD) Dog Bites Man.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at May 04, 2012 05:35 PM (AlYnQ)

60 Michael Moore is so fat, when he goes home he has to walk around and around his house until he's all in.

Posted by: Not an Artist at May 04, 2012 05:35 PM (uRumV)

61 Ooo cah too mah cahba. HOHOHOHOHO {slurp} Tu va mah ca sah mah hah. HOHOHOHOHO

Posted by: Bitter clinger and all that at May 04, 2012 05:36 PM (CP+yl)

62 I believe I love cock.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:36 PM (x2CNJ)

63 FREEDOM OF CHOICE also works. Implies their true desires.

How did one so young become so devoted?

Posted by: fluffy has a gut feeling at May 04, 2012 05:36 PM (z9HTb)

64 Do you think if he fell over, he'd roll, or just squish in like a flat tire?

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at May 04, 2012 05:36 PM (NVu2l)

65 Michael Moore is so fat he's got his own zip code.

Posted by: Bitter clinger and all that at May 04, 2012 05:37 PM (CP+yl)

66 #74 Is it 00000?

Posted by: Hummingbird at May 04, 2012 05:37 PM (R5yLq)

67 Michael Moore is so fat, he has asteroids orbiting him. They're made of Cheese Gromit!

Posted by: Bitter clinger and all that at May 04, 2012 05:38 PM (CP+yl)

68 >>Is competitive eating an art?

It's a sport.
http://www.ifoce.com/index.php

Posted by: Radish A. Radish at May 04, 2012 05:39 PM (hO8IJ)

69 A respectable Dylan cover necessitates perfect pitch.

Posted by: Jimi Ray at May 04, 2012 05:40 PM (Clp1x)

70 Guys, you should give me lots of cock.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:40 PM (x2CNJ)

71 Kobayashi still owns the world bratwurst-eating record. (http://www.ifoce.com/records.php)

It's good to have goals, right?

Posted by: Radish A. Radish at May 04, 2012 05:41 PM (hO8IJ)

72 I own the world choad-smoking record.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:43 PM (x2CNJ)

73 Moore keeps cheeseburgers warm between his layers of fat.

Posted by: eman at May 04, 2012 05:44 PM (XrDou)

74 Like I say, the Left is a reactionary nostalgia movement. I hope to see it die out completely before I do.

Posted by: PJ at May 04, 2012 05:44 PM (DQHjw)

75 Da derp dee derp!

Obama is god and I want his cock in every orifice.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:44 PM (x2CNJ)

So my 12 year old is watching this stupid documentary on the Discovery channel about Prezdint Gutsycall and the Bin Laden raid. Now while I'm pleased as punch to hear my boy, with no prompting or education from me, call bullshit on the whole thing...I just can't take it when one of the dudes they're interviewing actually talks about the GutsinessÂ™ the Prezdizzle displayed.

Then I was overwhelmed when another commented about how well the JEF joked around at a banquet dinner and keeping his composure by saying "I wouldn't want to play poker against President Obama".

I told my boy "I'm glad that you can see through this bullshit, but it's getting just a bit too thick for your old man to tolerate anymore."

When my boy, basically an average 6th grader who also isn't really known for his astute political analysis can immediately see through this nonsense, I feel safe in saying most Americans see the same thing.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at May 04, 2012 05:46 PM (rX1N2)

77 Know what would be a true delight to the ears?

"MM Does JJ: Michael Moore covers Janis Joplin's greatest hits."

Posted by: Nicholas Kronos at May 04, 2012 05:47 PM (t28jU)

78 Betcha he thinks Chris Christie is a big fat pig.

Posted by: torabora at May 04, 2012 05:47 PM (ApH8j)

79 And yet, when January rolls around and Romney is sworn in, this will be nominated for (and will win) a Grammy.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at May 04, 2012 05:48 PM (q1qCt)

Posted by: M. Moore at May 04, 2012 05:49 PM (x2CNJ)

81 And every speech at the Grammy awards will bemoan the onset of totalitarianism onto this land.

*spit*

Posted by: Radish A. Radish at May 04, 2012 05:49 PM (hO8IJ)

82 Michael Moore is being occupied by flesh eating bacteria. He's been given 100 years to live.

Posted by: Northern lurker at May 04, 2012 05:50 PM (J0qsH)

83 Whoever is fucking with raykon using the "hilarity" feature of the TB3K has my undying gratitude. I'm laughing so hard I cant even be mad that the Preds suck so hard.

Posted by: DC in Towson at May 04, 2012 05:50 PM (I/cLr)

Posted by: chemjeff at May 04, 2012 09:49 PM (7FadD)

You're harshin' my mellow dude...

Posted by: Burn the Witch at May 04, 2012 05:50 PM (rX1N2)

85 >>> "I wouldn't want to play poker against President Obama".

Translated: I'm an idiot who has no business playing Chutes & Ladders against Joy Behar's sweaty under-boobage.

Posted by: Nicholas Kronos at May 04, 2012 05:50 PM (t28jU)

86 Although the Preds suck, they don't suck nearly as much as the Prez. Or raykon, who sucks cock by choice.

Posted by: DC in Towson at May 04, 2012 05:51 PM (I/cLr)

87 Ladies, we have much in common. You see, I also like dicks.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:54 PM (x2CNJ)

88 How about NO, you crazy dutch bastard.

Posted by: Dr. Evil at May 04, 2012 05:54 PM (nwL1o)

89 But mostly Im ready to suck lots of cock.

Klaus Nomi, my hero?

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:55 PM (x2CNJ)

90 Then I was overwhelmed when another commented about how well the JEF joked around at a banquet dinner and keeping his composure by saying "I wouldn't want to play poker against President Obama".
Posted by: Burn the Witch at May 04, 2012 09:46 PM

Who would want to play poker against him when you have the MBM peaking at your cards and telling him out loud that you have an inside straight

Posted by: kbdabear at May 04, 2012 05:56 PM (Y+DPZ)

91 Blah blah blah my posts are drivel

Cock!

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 05:57 PM (x2CNJ)

92 I stick my hand in fans

I Am Con

Posted by: I Am Idiot at May 04, 2012 05:57 PM (Y+DPZ)

Michael Moore singing?

Ewwwwwwwwwwww!

Posted by: Jim in Virginia at May 04, 2012 05:57 PM (WF9oT)

94 I bang my head against the wall because it feels good when I stop

I Am Raykon

Posted by: I Am Idiot at May 04, 2012 05:57 PM (Y+DPZ)

95 Listened to the whole track. Resounding "meh"; wouldn't get a lot of dislike if it was being played at open mike night at a coffee shop, but a commercially available track? I think not. If this is really Michael Moore, he has that same speak-singing problem that William Shatner has. Can't reach the notes? Just recite the lyrics. Mark Knopfler can pull that shit off, but Mikey is no Mark Knopfler. Although these days, he sure is getting a hell of a lot of Money for Nothing . . .

Posted by: Rosa E. at May 04, 2012 05:58 PM (kxrRT)

96 We do deserve equal pay.

So no working for the Obama Administration for us.

Posted by: huerfano at May 04, 2012 05:58 PM (bAGA/)

97 DOOM is coming to Bank of America:
http://tinyurl.com/6vwdm8m

I've also taken note that BoA pulled its loan service out of Boulder last year, and its ATMs out of ... well... everywhere outside Denver last week.

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at May 04, 2012 05:58 PM (QTHTd)

98 Vaporboy's here early.

Posted by: toby928© denounces himself so you don't have to at May 04, 2012 05:58 PM (NG097)

99 I light a match to see how much gas is in the tank

I Am Raykon

Posted by: I Am Idiot at May 04, 2012 05:58 PM (Y+DPZ)

100 Thanks to the Amboy Dukes/Nugent link I just spent the last couple hours on YouTube listening to 60's and 70's music. Freak'n YouTube.

Posted by: lowandslow at May 04, 2012 05:58 PM (GZitp)

101

That actually wasn't too bad if you're an Occutard.

I'm assuming the fat tub o' lard fancies himself an Irishman and followed the hippie example of flutes and acoustic chord progressions.

He should have offered to sing along with "Celtic Woman" but the stage probably wouldn't support his tonnage.

Posted by: ErikW at May 04, 2012 05:59 PM (75Izs)

102 I wear my underwear on the outside because it gives me super powers

I Am Raykon

Posted by: I Am Idiot at May 04, 2012 06:00 PM (Y+DPZ)

103 Burn the Witch: I hate to tell you this, but there's a whole lot of dumb people out there. I just went to a carnival in the part of the county I grew up in (the original white flight zone) and it was full of people I can most succinctly describe as SCOAMT voters. I think there are more dumb people now than even a few years ago, their brains added by neglect and propaganda. Plus, I fear that these stupid people who voted for the SCOAMT in the first place did so out of emotion rather than intelligence or logic, which leads to denial and continued support. I pray daily for the end of the SCOAMT reign.

Posted by: Justamom at May 04, 2012 06:01 PM (Sptt8)

104 OH, you mean singing with his mouth I expected you to say he was making musical farts like Mr Methane lol

Posted by: Reaganite Republican at May 04, 2012 06:01 PM (qfiA8)

105 I like lick...
Ing cock
Give me cock
And I'll still be really stupid.

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:01 PM (x2CNJ)

106 At OWS, I hurt myself blowing up a bus

I burned my lips on the tailpipe

I Am Raykon

Posted by: I Am Idiot at May 04, 2012 06:01 PM (Y+DPZ)

107 I love cock
Yes it's true
So give me some
And I'll eat your spew

Burma Shave

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:03 PM (x2CNJ)

108 At 15, Julia has a relationship with a carnie which results in the birth of a special needs child named Raykon

Posted by: Barack Vandelay at May 04, 2012 06:04 PM (Y+DPZ)

109 raykon leaves the highway reststops every day with a bad taste in his mouth, and $14.75 in quarters

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at May 04, 2012 06:04 PM (QTHTd)

110 My needs r not special
All I need is cock

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:05 PM (x2CNJ)

111 My school nurse said I was fat so I drank paint thinner

I Am Raykon

Posted by: I Am Idiot at May 04, 2012 06:05 PM (Y+DPZ)

112 I wasted your bandwidth
Then mommy called down to the basement for me to go to bed

Cock

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:06 PM (x2CNJ)

113 Mommy, I don't want to go to sleep!
People are paying attention to me!

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:08 PM (x2CNJ)

114 Someone's parents grounded them so they came here for the night?

Posted by: phoenixgirl at May 04, 2012 06:08 PM (ycBV3)

115 Oh no, not parents
No idea who daddy is

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:09 PM (x2CNJ)

116 Uh oh, Ace centric ONT material

Posted by: kbdabear at May 04, 2012 06:09 PM (Y+DPZ)

117 I would suck Michael Moore's dick but first we must find it...

Posted by: I am troll at May 04, 2012 06:10 PM (x2CNJ)

118 Poor raykon, stuck in the basement on a Friday night.

Posted by: CDR M at May 04, 2012 06:10 PM (QaYwz)

119
Stupid.

A 26,000 word movie review of Bambi would be a better use of bandwidth.

Posted by: Ed Anger - Certified Kos Kid at May 04, 2012 06:10 PM (7+pP9)

120 Ace reviewed Bambi?

Posted by: CDR M at May 04, 2012 06:11 PM (QaYwz)

121 hm... very Bobby Goldsboros-ish. except with 25% more cheese. I can see a South Park episode with MM as the Gerbil King...he can do anything. (apologies tp Lemmiwinks)

Posted by: a music critic at May 04, 2012 06:20 PM (VkOOC)

122 I just love it when a trollbuster is on duty.

Posted by: Damn Sockpuppet at May 04, 2012 06:48 PM (fiXQh)

123 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at May 04, 2012 06:49 PM (6HIQG)

124 Michael Moore's only tactic is building fat cells.

Posted by: steevy at May 04, 2012 06:50 PM (6HIQG)

125 I got to the fourth word and shut it off. Is that a record?

Posted by: Jimmah at May 04, 2012 07:32 PM (UpwlP)

126 He sounds like he's trying to channel eaten the Chad Mitchell Trio.

FTFY.

*you're welcome*

Posted by: enter sandman, sometime commenter, fulltime troublemaker at May 04, 2012 07:55 PM (zxaA2)

127 Some editing features are not working...still. Dang.

Posted by: enter sandman, sometime commenter, fulltime troublemaker at May 04, 2012 08:08 PM (zxaA2)

128 Michael Moore forgot to take his butt plug out. Now, that I have done him it's jammed in so deep he can't get it out. I am leaving before he explodes.

Posted by: Barney F. at May 04, 2012 09:40 PM (VswEk)

129 You really make it seem so uderstandable with your presentation but I find this topic before really hard to understand. It seems too complicated and very broad for me.

Posted by: Most Talkative iBooks at May 08, 2012 04:07 AM (lHIrn)

130 Thanks for sharing, please keep an update about this info. love to read it more. i like this site too much.

Posted by: City of Lost Souls ePub at May 08, 2012 04:36 AM (L61Se)

131 Wow i really found this to be an interesting read; thanks for sharing

Posted by: Hard Country iBook at May 08, 2012 05:07 AM (BZ8t+)

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