July 12, 2012

"Other Things Mitt Romney Does"
— Ace

...according to @theDemocrats.

@Andrew_Dad suggested "golfs too much," and I suggest "ate a dog."

Go!

Posted by: Ace at 12:12 PM | Comments (1056)
Post contains 25 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Flips his opponents the bird.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (QKKT0)

2 Disses the NAACP

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (QKKT0)

3

"wears mom jeans while missing the plate by twelve feet on opening day"

Posted by: kallisto at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (jm/9g)

4 Say "I won"...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (lZBBB)

5 He bows to every despot leader around the globe

Posted by: Memories at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (JmJSD)

6 is I still banned?
- in the non-banned sense of the word

Posted by: BumperStickerist at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (OQe0z)

7 Has a CAR ELEVATOR IN HIS GARAGE, ZOMG!!111!!!

Posted by: Theresa at July 12, 2012 12:13 PM (36Yg+)

8 Bow to the Saudis... which seems to have worked to get oil prices down...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 12:14 PM (lZBBB)

9 stutters.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:14 PM (VndSC)

10

Ace,

Are you going to write a peice about the Mormon cover on Bloomberg Businessweek?

Posted by: joe at July 12, 2012 12:14 PM (i3OIF)

11 enjoys having david brooks.

Posted by: Ebuzz Bunny, Feminist at July 12, 2012 12:14 PM (cNcWo)

12 visits Chicago Bathhouses with Rahm Emmanuel.

Posted by: Naqamel at July 12, 2012 12:14 PM (UMwMT)

13 Has a wife he doesn't mind sleeping with?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at July 12, 2012 12:14 PM (qVPyj)

14 Assasinates American Citizens... via drone....

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 12:15 PM (lZBBB)

15 Kills Mexicans in large numbers.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:15 PM (QKKT0)

16

Brushes his teeth with his index finger.

Posted by: Regrettable at July 12, 2012 12:16 PM (BvTwT)

17 I hear he electrocutes his wife's horses to get them to do ballet, and if they don't perform well, he takes them out back and drowns them.

Posted by: Ikemay Ickvay at July 12, 2012 12:16 PM (t/mao)

18 buys arugula when its not on sale!

Posted by: Ebuzz Bunny, Feminist at July 12, 2012 12:16 PM (cNcWo)

19 something about Osama.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:16 PM (VndSC)

20 Get it correct, Morons. ;^) It's about Romney.. not Obama. For instance, "Doesn't hate America."

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at July 12, 2012 12:16 PM (qVPyj)

21 Uses executive privilege to cover up his Justice Department giving guns to drug cartels.

Posted by: buzzion at July 12, 2012 12:16 PM (GULKT)

22 tries to eat his waffles in peace

Posted by: kallisto at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (jm/9g)

23 pines over Reggie Love's departure for weeks on end.

Posted by: Naqamel at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (UMwMT)

24 Blames Bush for everything.

Posted by: buzzion at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (GULKT)

25 Couldn't say his own name if he wasn't reading it off of a teleprompter

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (1Jaio)

26 Gets his "morning briefing" at 10:45.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (ZKzrr)

27 Is a proven competent.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - making bunnies cry since 1966 at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (hLRSq)

28 Blows off the NAACP.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:17 PM (ZKzrr)

29 Get it correct, Morons. ;^) It's about Romney.. not Obama. I'm so unappreciated.

Posted by: twitter irony at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (evdj2)

30 Slices like an f'n hammer

Posted by: Regrettable at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (BvTwT)

31 Gives shout-outs before announcing terrorist attacks, which he then calls "workplace violence".

Posted by: The Mega Independent at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (AjO9v)

32 Oh let em go... it's fun....

Posted by: mkn at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (XJtuW)

33 Get it correct, Morons. ;^) It's about Romney.. not Obama.

Um, I believe it's still Opposite Day.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (QKKT0)

34 Has an ugly, huge, hulking wife with a perpetual scowl on her face

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (1Jaio)

35 I'm his body man. IYKWIMAITYD

Posted by: Reggie Love at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (54vf8)

36 You should just change the title of the thread.

Posted by: Jaimo at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (9U1OG)

37 Sits in church where Rev. Wright is preeching for 20 years without hearing any racist remarks. 

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (TOk1P)

38
.... shuffles mistresses off to the Caribbean.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:18 PM (C8hzL)

39 hangs out much too much with gay fashionista types.

Posted by: Ebuzz Bunny, Feminist at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (cNcWo)

40 Drinks booze and has a beer summit on the public dollar

Posted by: Robert at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (r4GuR)

41 Love to comment but I'm presently suffering from a mood disorder.

Posted by: Libra at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (kd8U8)

42 Lies about where he was born.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (AjO9v)

43 >>Get it correct, Morons. ;^) It's about Romney.. not Obama.

I see you've never played this game before.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (ZKzrr)

44 #BeatingOnAmerica

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (evdj2)

45 Kissed Chavez's ass

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (1Jaio)

46 He punches above his weight.
<fey gesture>

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (sClIO)

47 Would have a kid that looks like travon!

Posted by: Robert at July 12, 2012 12:19 PM (r4GuR)

48 F'n irony, how does it work????

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (QKKT0)

49 Claims Kenyan birth in his publisher's biography.

Posted by: buzzion at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (GULKT)

50 enjoys a fine cup of chowder.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (tGvo7)

51 Believes in black liberation theology

Posted by: Robert at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (r4GuR)

52 Wears a bicycle helmet riding his Jet Ski.

Posted by: Michael Rittenhouse at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (2Oas0)

53 Questions about his citizenship status?  Let's see the birth certificate, Romney, if that is your real name!!

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (TOk1P)

54 Outsourced the writing of his autobiography to an international terrorist instead of using a domestic one.

Posted by: Mitt Romney's publisher at July 12, 2012 12:20 PM (t/mao)

55 Blames all of his failures on racism.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (QKKT0)

56
... has bombers write his auto-biography.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (C8hzL)

57 Doesn't get me.

Posted by: IRONY at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (54vf8)

58 Lies about Bain Capital

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (Y+wkX)

59

always addresses Valerie Jarrett with "Mistress may I..."

Posted by: kallisto at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (jm/9g)

60 Has giant Soviet Style propaganda posters made of himself that say stupid things like "Hope" and "Change".

Posted by: The Mega Independent at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (AjO9v)

61 klingon konsort

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (tGvo7)

62 Embarrassing Olympics fiasco. 

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (TOk1P)

63 slices every drive to the left.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:21 PM (VndSC)

64

Bows to foreign heads of state.

 

 

Posted by: alexthechick SMOD. It's what's for dinner. at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (VtjlW)

65 Blames Bush for everything. Says "Pock-E-Stan" every chance he gets. Keeps an enemys list. Attends but doesn't listen to Rev. Wright sermons. Was for the mandate.

Posted by: Jollyroger at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (htu8n)

66 OT:
I other news,
XCOR Aerospace moves its R&D operation to Midland, TX from Mojave, CA.

Posted by: RioBravo at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (eEfYn)

67 Doesn't look like other Presidents.

Posted by: naturalfake at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (54vf8)

68 Currently occupies the Office of the Prospective President-Elect

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (QKKT0)

69 Got Timothy McVeigh to ghost write his autobiography.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (G5ubv)

70 has beer summits.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (tGvo7)

71 Tried to interfere in a Honduran presidential election and shit all over their Constitution like his does ours

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (1Jaio)

72 Always photographed with a halo in back.

Posted by: buzzion at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (GULKT)

73 Thinks Kanye West is a jack@$$.

Posted by: Talor Swift at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (qyjnV)

74 eats hot dogs.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (VndSC)

75 keeps spelling potato with an "e"

Posted by: Regrettable at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (BvTwT)

76 Thinks the U.S. has 57 states

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:22 PM (QKKT0)

77 Manages his administration with check-box forms.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (sClIO)

78 Got a hummer from some guy named Larry.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (Y+wkX)

79 just "knows" when you've made enough money.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (0It32)

80 Thinks he's some sort of messiah that can lower ocean levels and heal cancer with his mind.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (G5ubv)

81 Votes "Present"

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (VJUQK)

82 Downgrades your credit rating.

Posted by: BuddyPC at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (KCuY9)

83 celebrates Cinco de Quatro

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (tGvo7)

84 Gave half a billion dollars to his Solyndra cronies.

Posted by: naturalfake at July 12, 2012 12:23 PM (54vf8)

85 Flies his dog on a separate plane.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (QKKT0)

86 knows some plumber named joe...

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (oZfic)

87 Hissssessss when he talksssss and it alwaysssss pissssessssss me off!

Posted by: Cobra Commander at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (t/mao)

88 Tried to interfere in a Honduran presidential election and shit all over their Constitution like his does ours
Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 04:22 PM
--------------------------------
grrrrr....

Posted by: Moron Still Pissed About This at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (ay6+/)

89 Honest to God, you morons are the best on the web. I love it here, keep up the good work please, without humor I'd be stalking Dems as we speak.

Posted by: BIG ROB at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (MuXag)

90 Thinks, at a certain point, you've made enough money.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (G5ubv)

91 Puts on a phony "black preacher" accent when he speaks to black audiences and does a stupid well-practiced phony black walk for street cred, but is otherwise whiter than Rue McClanahan.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (AjO9v)

92
SPENDS HIS OWN GODDAMNED MONEY.

( i know..... not keeping with theme here)

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (C8hzL)

93 Can't pronounce corpsman.

Posted by: A Monkey On Crack at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (O7Q1u)

94 gives tingles to newscasters.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (tGvo7)

95 Doesn't know certain words in Austrian

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (1Jaio)

96 Thinks Valerie Jarrett gives good advice.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (QKKT0)

97 speaks fluent Austrian.

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (115KO)

98 Has sex with the giant, golden embroidered drapery.

Posted by: wooga at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (vjyZP)

99 Failed to close Gitmo

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:24 PM (ZKzrr)

100 Sets up irrelevant strawman arguments when addressing the public.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (G5ubv)

101 Likes filling out NCAA brackets on company time.

Posted by: Hypocrit at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (qyjnV)

102 Gave the Queen of England an iPod with his own speeches on it

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (1Jaio)

103 Doesn't hear a word of what's said in church for 20 years.

Posted by: alexthechick SMOD. It's what's for dinner. at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (VtjlW)

104 leaves the guests with the bill for lunch..

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (oZfic)

105 Other things romney does/doesn't do:

...doesn't say yaow.

....can correctly name the stadium that the White Sox used to play in (and it ain't Cominskey).

...doesn't do ncaa brackets on ESPN.

...can produce, almost magically, a birth certificate for more than 3 people to inspect more than once.

...is willingly seen with a wife that doesn't terrify small children and lapdogs.

...says more than merci beaucoup in French.

....refuses to hand out i-pods loaded with his past speeches.

...will actively support the one sane and democratic state in the Middle East, without first being threatened with a loss of campaign funding.

...identifies the capital of Canada as Ottowa, as opposed to Iowa.

...has the nerve to give a speech in front of a hostile audience, instead of demanding IDs, taking away silverware, and pre-loading selected toadies to make up his crowd.

... will speak without magical lectric prompter paddles.

...will insist that his wife pay for her own vacations.









Posted by: Chariots of Toast at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (eNURf)

106 is just beside himself when Kal Penn's away.

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (115KO)

107 Is the first gay president.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (G5ubv)

108 he fucking rushes to judgment too quickly when one of his buddis gets pinchd by the cops, the white racist cops.

Posted by: Ebuzz Bunny, Feminist at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (cNcWo)

109 Is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable tyrant.

Posted by: A Monkey On Crack at July 12, 2012 12:25 PM (O7Q1u)

110
.... has 7 three puts and 4 lost balls on his score card.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (C8hzL)

111 Throw a sissy first pitch.

Can't get an umbrella through a garden gate.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (UOM48)

112 Makes old ladies faint.

Posted by: elliot m at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (zPich)

113 Purchased the entire "Mao for the Holidays" Christmas collection from the Commie Bastards Supply Depot

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (QKKT0)

114 have an affair with Ms. Baker, V. and Ms. Penn, Kal.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (QxSug)

115 Doesn't listen in church (for twenty-two years straight).

Posted by: Coprse Man at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (ay6+/)

116 Threw granny under the bus because she's a typical white person

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (1Jaio)

117 Is respected and lauded by David Brooks, David Frum and Meghan 'Back-Tits' McCain.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (G5ubv)

118 Will need some doddering old fool of a Senator as his running mate, just to make  it seem like there are grownups around. 

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (TOk1P)

119 Mitt Romney:  too much choom in his youth

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (1oeZb)

120 Gives a shout out to Indians after hearing of murders at Ft. Hood.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (Y+wkX)

121 presided over an organization that went trillion into debt

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (VndSC)

122 Has to be dragged off the golf course to make a Gutsy Call.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (UOM48)

123 108 is just beside himself when Kal Penn's away.

Hey! I resemble that remark!

Posted by: Reggie Love at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (vjyZP)

124 ring up $5T deficit handing out money to his donors and union contributors.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 12:26 PM (QxSug)

125 Has impeccable creases in his trousers.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (G5ubv)

126 Can say that we will be able to look back and tell our children that this was the moment when we began to provide care for the sick and good jobs to the jobless; this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal; this was the time – when we came together to remake this great nation so that it may always reflect our very best selves, and our highest ideals.

Posted by: Mary Katherine Ham at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (qyjnV)

127
Romney spends my money!!

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (9Q7Nu)

128 Tells us he's visited nearly all 57 states.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (UOM48)

129 maintains a state of cleanliness and articulateness.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (tGvo7)

130 If he had a son he'd look like Trayvon

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (1Jaio)

131 Just wants to eat his ice cream,

Posted by: A Monkey On Crack at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (O7Q1u)

132 eats icecream cones with a spoon

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (G7cU+)

133 lowered the oceans

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:27 PM (VndSC)

134 Wants to order some shrimp in peace.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (UOM48)

135 Will pay my mortgage!

Posted by: Peggy Joseph at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (O7Q1u)

136 Eats his peas.

Posted by: Sasha at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (qyjnV)

137 What's this.... Romney's New Party dues card????

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (TOk1P)

138 breaking news!

"Just What Signal a Woman Gives Out Remains Unclear--but It May Involve a Wiggle of the Hips, say German Scientists"--headline, Daily Mail (London), July 9

I think that the Big Bopper cleared this up for us many years ago.

Chaintily lace and a pretty face and a pony tail hangin' down
A wiggle in her walk and a giggle in her talk makes the world go round
There ain't nothing in the world
Like a big eyed girl to make me act so funny make me spend my dog gone money
Make me feel real loose like a long necked goose
Oh baby that's what I like.

Maybe those Kraut scientists were still too busy sieg heiling to pay attention.

Posted by: WalrusRex at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (Hx5uv)

139 Shuts down Manhattan for date night.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (UOM48)

140 Turns the shooting of a Congresswoman (and a dozen others) into a campaign stop complete with weird, creepy sloganized T-shirts. Bad Mitt Romney. Bad, Bad Mitt Romney!!!

Posted by: The Mega Independent at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (AjO9v)

141

...doesn't say: ..."If I had a son, he would look like _____"

 

Romney has 5 sons....and he knows what they look like.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (MbB0O)

142 Had two composite auto(?)biographies out before he had even done anything.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (FcR7P)

143 likes to throw people under a canadian manufactured bus...

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:28 PM (oZfic)

144

wants our guns.

 

insults foreign leaders, makes allies go through the back door.

 

wants to be bff with russia after the next election.

 

 screws the country's ability to have a financial recovery.

 

hires a DOJ leaders that kills allied countries citizens . and won't fire him.

 

goes after private citizens that say something he didn't want revealed, or lick His boots.

 

 

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (TomZ9)

145 sports mom jeans.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (tGvo7)

146 Takes long and frequent vacations on the tax payers dollars and his beast wife takes a separate plane to and from

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (1Jaio)

147 His old girlfriends are all composites.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (UOM48)

148 Relies on the ball-washers in the MSM to cover for him.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (sClIO)

149 Hangs ornaments on his xmas tree commemorating brutal dictators

Posted by: Uncledave at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (nJ32z)

150

"slices every drive to the left."

Redundant!

 

Posted by: 3rd_Bird at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (s2a4F)

151 Show some respect, Romney, get your feet off the desk!

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (TOk1P)

152 Sat in a pew every week and listened to a hatemongering racist asshole for 20 years.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:29 PM (G5ubv)

153 Posted by: Cobra Commander I laughed out loud, CC.

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (evdj2)

154 sends public money- BIG public money- to his donors.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (FcR7P)

155
..... got Bin Laden.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (C8hzL)

156 wears women's jeans and rides girls' bikes

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (G7cU+)

157 First week in office, sends the bust of Churchill back to the Brits.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (UOM48)

158 blows hippo ass

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (tGvo7)

159 Is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (G5ubv)

160 walks on the same water he drove the economy under.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (VndSC)

161 Hung out with domestic terrorists

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (QKKT0)

162 mastered the intricacies of opening and closing an umbrella in such a manner as to prevent his wife from getting wet.

Posted by: Penfold at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (1PeEC)

163 gives away rides on his private plane and gets so close in to Manhattan people begin running in fear...

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (oZfic)

164 Dumps his campaign costs on the remaining taxpayers after putting a shit-load of them out of work.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (sClIO)

165 Tries to enter the White House through a window.

Bumps his head getting out of Marine One.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:30 PM (x2CNJ)

166 ....says he has visited 57 States.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (MbB0O)

167

waxes philosophic with the choom gang.  in the choom van.  on the choom.

Posted by: cfh13 at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (W4M5J)

168 liberated Gitmo

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (0It32)

169 Has a beast wife who spend God knows how much money on a Spanish vacation for herself and 'close' friends

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (1Jaio)

170 Corpseman.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (wtHo/)

171
attracts flies.

and rats.....

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (C8hzL)

172

rainbows in the military

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (G7cU+)

173 Has only used one given name, and had one surname in his whole life. How can you trust someone who doesn't change his name periodically?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (Wx98x)

174 confuses the Queen with an iPod.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (tGvo7)

175 Married a woman with an Elizabeth Taylor sense of style and Phillis Diller looks.

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (VJUQK)

176 @166 FTW.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (QxSug)

177 Pronounces corpsman "corpseman".....twice in one speech.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (UOM48)

178 Goes on vacation and gets locked out of the White House.

Posted by: Dumb@$$ at July 12, 2012 12:31 PM (qyjnV)

179 is an out of touch, effete rich guy

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:32 PM (115KO)

180 Does a AF-1 flyby of the Statue of Liberty

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:32 PM (1oeZb)

181 Thinks printing money and setting fire to it saves or creates jobs.

Posted by: Al at July 12, 2012 12:32 PM (MzQOZ)

182 Bows to Saudi king and tin-pot dictators.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:32 PM (UOM48)

183 Has an eye problem, and a me problem...but mostly eye.

Posted by: Reis Gorthanes at July 12, 2012 12:32 PM (Xd92z)

184 Uses nuanced words like "uh" and "err".

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:32 PM (wtHo/)

185 motivates 100% of conservatives to get out and vote in November.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (VndSC)

186 says, regarding Bradley Cooper, he "gets it"

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (115KO)

187 You can tell he's lying because his lips are moving.  And he stammers.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (UOM48)

188 Is quite taken with himself.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (G5ubv)

189 makes energy rates necessarily skyrocket

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (G7cU+)

190 Claimed to have control over the oceans and the earth.
What an ego!

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (sClIO)

191 .....does a 'crotch salute' for fallen military personel, killed at Ft. Hood.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (MbB0O)

192 Believes that the "dig a hole, fill a hole" plan will lead to full employment.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (QKKT0)

193 Hands out campaign T-shirts at the memorial after a mass shooting.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (ZKzrr)

194 Waves in pictures and blocks other people's faces.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (x2CNJ)

195 has a penchant for arugula and executive orders

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (oZfic)

196 Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 04:32 PM (wtHo/)

and "tuh" don't forget tuh.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (0It32)

197 Knows how many states there are.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (Wx98x)

198 Puts "I", "me" and "my" into every sentence he utters, at least once.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (1oeZb)

199 babbles incoherently when asked to speak without a script

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:33 PM (115KO)

200 Truly understands profits and earning ratios.

Posted by: BuddyPC at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (KCuY9)

201 Gives a graduation speech and tells students about epantsipation. Must be an Austrian word

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (1Jaio)

202 has a new bff named john who has a penchant for wearing black robes..

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (oZfic)

203 Tells us we "should be thanking" him....for what?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (UOM48)

204 Whines about obstructionism and lack of bi-partisanship after 2 years of ramming shit through congress with majorities in both houses.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (G5ubv)

205 Wipes his ass with me.

Posted by: The Constitution at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (O7Q1u)

206
CNBC: A report from the Federal Reserve Bank of New York suggests the S&P 500 would be more than 50 percent lower if it weren't for the actions of the US central bank.

No doubt. The Fed meddled instead of allowing the market to correct itself. Now we have a propped up stock market that will eventually crash. Nice job, Fed.

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (9Q7Nu)

207 Thinks 5.4% unemployment is bad, but 9.0% is good.

Posted by: Al at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (MzQOZ)

208 Goes on endlessly about cars in a ditch and headwinds

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (1Jaio)

209 Gets all wee-wee'd up.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:34 PM (G5ubv)

210 Has yet to pass a mirror without winking at it.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (sClIO)

211

Thinks the U.S. liberated Auschwitz, which he figures is somewhere in New Jersey.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (Wx98x)

212

tells us that the bad guys really just need a big hug

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (G7cU+)

213 Forces you to pay for Flukety Flukes birth control.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (Y+wkX)

214 Totally looks like Urkel.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (x2CNJ)

215 Sure, but have you heard him speak without the teleprompter? 

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (TOk1P)

216 Takes care of his aunt.

Posted by: BuddyPC at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (KCuY9)

217 Provides "Elect Mitt Romney" T-shirts for women to be buried in.

Posted by: elliot m at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (zPich)

218 Goes to the Gulf coast after the BP oil spill, squats, and stares mystified at a little tar ball.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (UOM48)

219 names the dog after himself and then eats it, creating a Freudian Möbius Loop which disrupts the time-space continuum.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (tGvo7)

220
I hate it when Mitt Romney says "wee wee."

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (9Q7Nu)

221 looks stunning in mom jeans and special helemt.

Posted by: Vegan Meatball at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (mxnUd)

222 Names pets after his initials.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (x2CNJ)

223 Doesn't know the difference between 'intercontinental' and 'transcontinental'

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (sClIO)

224 Is a big fan of Sycacuse.

Posted by: BuddyPC at July 12, 2012 12:35 PM (KCuY9)

225 Seems uncertain about his children's ages and genders.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (ZKzrr)

226 Has multiple social security numbers

Posted by: Dave@ at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (SHHCw)

227 Demands that his statements are "perfectly clear".

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (wtHo/)

228 Closes Border Control Stations.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (Y+wkX)

229 Throws "typical white" granny under the bus.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (UOM48)

230 has figured out ways to showcase his middle finger in pics for conservatives to later discover

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (oZfic)

231 Won the Nobel Prize for breathing. While black.

Posted by: Al at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (MzQOZ)

232 I would "Go" but I'm twitter impaired.  I can never figure out who is talking to who or what anyone is even talking about.

Posted by: not the guy who says En Fuego, the other guy, the guy with his shoes on his knees at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (KXm42)

233 The Fed meddled instead of allowing the market to correct itself. Now we have a propped up stock market that will eventually crash. Nice job, Fed.

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 04:34 PM (9Q7Nu) 

 

The stocks aren't necessarily higher, but the dollars the stocks are measured in are certainly lower.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (1oeZb)

234
.... asks to send your wedding present to him.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (C8hzL)

235 ....re-writes the histories of past Presidential biographies, to include himself in their accomplishments.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (MbB0O)

236 thinks he can actually slam-dunk.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (VndSC)

237 His parents met for the first time in Selma, 4 years after he was born

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (1Jaio)

238

goes to war in a Foreign country without congressional approval.

 

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (TomZ9)

239 Thanks Rons, I'm doing my best schtick on the other thread but does anyone post so much as a Nood? No. Now I demand you all return to the previous post and read my last comment.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (9TTOe)

240 Eats ice cream while his wife bullies fat kids.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at July 12, 2012 12:36 PM (ZKzrr)

241

puts his stub in what must be the darkest and unholiest of holes.

Posted by: cfh13 at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (W4M5J)

242 Is completely incoherent off the teleprompter.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (Wx98x)

243 Loves going to baseball games at Kaminski Park.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (wtHo/)

244 Thought Sheriff Biden would sort things out

Posted by: Penfold at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (1PeEC)

245 Eats an Ice Cream cone with a spoon...

Posted by: CSMBigBird at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (jsWA8)

246 Thinks the Arabs were -tricked- into selling Africans to the Dutch ... by the British & Americans.

Posted by: Al at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (MzQOZ)

247 Says if congress won't pass it, he will.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (Y+wkX)

248 Invented an imaginary woman named Julia to show how wonderful cradle to grave government programs are

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (1Jaio)

249 >>puts his stub in what must bethe darkest and unholiest of holes.

That was hurtful.

Posted by: Kal Penn at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (ZKzrr)

250 Likes to inhale

Posted by: 3rd_Bird at July 12, 2012 12:37 PM (s2a4F)

251 Won the Nobel Prize for breathing. While black.

He really is the one they were waiting for.  Dude's whole fucking life is a magic carpet ride.

Posted by: not the guy who says En Fuego, the other guy, the guy with his shoes on his knees at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (KXm42)

252 Tells us we should all vacation on the Gulf after the oil spill, drags wife and kids down for quick photo op, and then it's off to the Vineyard, bitches!

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (UOM48)

253 gets coffee for Bill Clinton.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (tGvo7)

254 he lies!

Posted by: Joe Wilson at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (mxnUd)

255 Spikes the football.... Every. Freakin'. Day.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (qyjnV)

256 Spend Christmas in Hawaii, with hundreds of thousands of dollars in Federal and Local money to be spent on security and forcing police and staff to work overtime away from their families.

Posted by: Alex at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (79B50)

257 Can name all of his favorite White Sox players

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (1Jaio)

258 isn't an alcoholic, although he is a carrier.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (VndSC)

259 If he had a son, would name him Trayvon.

Posted by: jaylouem at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (/K6dk)

260 Stop it!  You guys are taking all the good ones!

Posted by: dogfish at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (N2yhW)

261 Thinks those are his kids.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (9TTOe)

262 Knows what a P/E ratio stands for.

Posted by: some evil Wall Streeter at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (t/mao)

263 Hates us all.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (ZKzrr)

264 Thinks the 'Nitally Lions' are just the greatest.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (G5ubv)

265 Has a father who also wasn't beaten by the British.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (Y+wkX)

266 Slurpee hater.

Posted by: naturalfake at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (54vf8)

267

loves George Clooney's Swiss parties

 

accepts foreign contributions

has his own European Outreach for accepting foreign contributions

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (G7cU+)

268 tells Jan Brewer "you are not the boss of me"

Posted by: kallisto at July 12, 2012 12:38 PM (jm/9g)

269 ....re-writes the histories of past Presidential biographies, to include himself in their accomplishments.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 04:36 PM (MbB0O) 

 

Romney job 1:  repeal the healthcare law

Romney job 2:  hire a re-writer

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (1oeZb)

270 Looks smart next to Joe Biden.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (tGvo7)

271

apologises to countries  for America.

 

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (TomZ9)

272 Throws baseballs like a girl.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (wtHo/)

273 Hates America.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (UOM48)

274 Thinks he's the fourth greatest president ever.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (G5ubv)

275 Doesn't smoke..............When anyone can see.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (9TTOe)

276 can't bowl his age.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (VndSC)

277 posts ghey pr0n links then lies about it

Posted by: joust me at July 12, 2012 12:39 PM (ggRof)

278 ....declares anyone who disagrees with him, the "Enemy".

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (MbB0O)

279 Picked a retard for VP.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (UOM48)

280 49 F'n irony, how does it work????   ---
It used to work, before barry got the car keys of the economy. Irony has been unemployed for 127 weeks now.

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (HPQnO)

281 Takes it up the poop chute.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (x2CNJ)

282 hates retards

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (tGvo7)

283 campaigns  for the Presidency in Other countries.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (TomZ9)

284 He tried really, really hard.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (G5ubv)

285 Thinks Bill Ayers is just some guy in his neighborhood.

Posted by: A Monkey On Crack at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (O7Q1u)

286 Was named in honor of an islamic murderer.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (QKKT0)

287 Gives himself a solid B+. The first time in his life he's gotten a grade that high

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (1Jaio)

288 Bowls "like the Special Olympics, or something."

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (UOM48)

289 Posted by: joust me at July 12, 2012 04:39 PM (ggRof)

---

You owe me a new monitor and some QT fresh brewed tea.....

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (C8hzL)

290 kills harmless flies.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:40 PM (tGvo7)

291

Observes cars in ditches.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (wtHo/)

292 Shows off his man boobs.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (8J5Ck)

293 Has no clue where those pre-paid credit card campaign donations are coming from. 

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (qyjnV)

294 hugs Helen Thomas every chance he gets

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (0It32)

295 Two words for you.

Bee.

Plus.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (x2CNJ)

296 Loves the Islamic morning call to prayer.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (9TTOe)

297 Coke when he can afford it?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (HPQnO)

298 Thinks you can tax and spend your way out of a bad economy

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (1Jaio)

299 Reads all the comments here. I've been watching him.



(and I've see *you* fapping too... you all know who I'm talking to...)

Posted by: Andrew Breitbart (watching from above) at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (t/mao)

300 A rat trots in front of the podium during a Rose Garden speech.  He also attracts flies.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:41 PM (UOM48)

301 Is 30% from the free throw line.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (9TTOe)

302 Has 95 percent of the media ready, eager and able to fellate him at a moment's notice.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (G5ubv)

303 gives men tingles in their 'legs'

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (G7cU+)

304 Really likes the cut of Andrew Sullivan's jib IYKWIMAITYD.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (x2CNJ)

305 Won't show his college transcripts. 

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (UOM48)

306 .....passes the Largest Tax Increase in the history of the US, with enough added provisions to take over complete control of everyone's lives.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (MbB0O)

307 has always previously said things he hasn't said before

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:42 PM (115KO)

308 calls half of american citizens the enemy , while having called killers and terrorists misunderstood with some legitimate griefs

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (TomZ9)

309 Says Obamacare will lower your insurance costs by 3,000%

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (1Jaio)

310 Wants to know whose ass to kick. Turns out it was America's.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (G5ubv)

311 seems to have had no friends or classmates who can recall him.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (FcR7P)

312 Men

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (8J5Ck)

313 filled out his draft card in 2008

Posted by: Dave@ at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (SHHCw)

314 Never did an honest day's work in his life.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (1oeZb)

315 is worried the unemployment rate might go over 8% if we don't implement the stimulus

Posted by: ace at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (115KO)

316 Sports a near-sociopathic narcissism that turns seemingly-reasonable people into gibbering schizophrenics.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (sClIO)

317 is a Stuttering clusterfuck of a Miserable Failure.

Posted by: Really? 300+ posts? at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (mxnUd)

318 Loves him some wagyu beef.  And parties.  Lots and lots of parties.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (UOM48)

319 Thinks Joe Biden is one smart cookie.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (QKKT0)

320 Does not like our Guns, Religion or opinion of people that aren't like us.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (9TTOe)

321 Thinks your Grandma should just take a pill and zone out before she dies.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:43 PM (G5ubv)

322

309

 

 

all of us except Gotham Princess?

Posted by: kallisto at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (jm/9g)

323 is a Christian, in an atheist way

Posted by: Allah at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (F6KtL)

324 Bizarrely proud of catching a housefly.

Posted by: naturalfake at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (54vf8)

325 was disappointed that he didn't get to eat the tiger, too

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (G7cU+)

326 Commie campaign slogan!

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (TOk1P)

327 Points out we need more "Arabic translators"----for Afghanistan.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (C8mVl)

328 Thinks we live for his fucking brackets. 

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (UOM48)

329 .....inhaled frequently....."that was the point".

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (MbB0O)

330 Will get around to focusing on the economy like a laser any day now.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (G5ubv)

331 Hates the 1% and shows it by hanging out with Hollywood types and other assorted rich douchebags

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (1Jaio)

332 Visited Pakistan at a time that US passport holders could not.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:44 PM (1oeZb)

333 likes the progress our economy is making.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (FcR7P)

334 Thinks more people on food stamps is good for economy.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (Y+wkX)

335 thinks he'd be a better twitterer than all other twits.

Posted by: Vegan Meatball at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (mxnUd)

336 (and I've see *you* fapping too... you all know who I'm talking to...)

Hey, somebody has to keep the lotion and tissue manufacturers in business.  We've lost too many jobs already, it's my patriotic duty now.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (4WhSY)

337 Thinks he's always the smartest person in the room.

Posted by: West at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (1Rgee)

338  pivots to jobs..... again.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (C8hzL)

339 Thinks -Republicans- were the ones: In KKK sheets, with dog-threats & firehoses, lynching, and baring the schoolhouse doors.

Posted by: Al at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (MzQOZ)

340 Hires convicted pedophiles to work on kids' issues

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (QKKT0)

341 Justice Roberts is "His Bitch"

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (9TTOe)

342 Will let you decide on the red or blue pill

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (1Jaio)

343 has got all of the  Democrats'   backs.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (VndSC)

344 Romney is a blank tablet upon with we bitter clingers write our hopes and dreams.

Posted by: OregonMuse at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (xm1A1)

345 Covers up the fact that he is mentally unstable because his mother abandoned him when he was a kid but kept his sister.

Posted by: polynikes at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (A9hpr)

346 Least qualified person in the Oval Office.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (UOM48)

347 Thinks the private sector is doing fine.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (G5ubv)

348 sends the Dalai Lama out the back door past the trash bins.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (qyjnV)

349 Never washes his crotch.  (I'm not really sure about that one.)

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (wtHo/)

350 Personally killed Osama bin Laden

Posted by: A Monkey On Crack at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (O7Q1u)

351 Moobs!

Posted by: naturalfake at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (54vf8)

352 Thinks the private sector is doing fine

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:45 PM (1Jaio)

353 99%er during speeches, 1%er at fundraisers.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (sClIO)

354 killed bin Laden with his bare hands, just like that grizzley bear in Hawaii.

Posted by: Vegan Meatball at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (mxnUd)

355 Loves his Muslim faith.  Christian!  I said Christian faith!

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (x2CNJ)

356 Gas prices will neccessarily skyrocket under his energy plan.

Posted by: Z Ryan at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (tsC/8)

357 Wants to 'spread the wealth around'

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (1oeZb)

358
thinks Debbie Wasaman Schultz is "cute"

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (9Q7Nu)

359 hires 'Austrian' translators.

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (HPQnO)

360 Shits gold and sneezes great ideas...if you ask MSNBC.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (G5ubv)

361 searched out marxists and grievance mongers  to hang out with.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (TomZ9)

362 Recommends breathalizers for asthmatic kids.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (C8mVl)

363 Got verbally bitch slapped by a Jew on live TV.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (9TTOe)

364 organizes housing for the poor that stands the test of time.  Determines time later.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (0It32)

365 Smugly says "I won" and "I'm the one riding on AF One" to Republicans right after the election.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:46 PM (UOM48)

366 Wants to put the coal industry out of business

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (1Jaio)

367 thinks san bernardino is the model of government efficiency.

Posted by: cfh13 at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (W4M5J)

368 disses Special Olympic participants.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (8J5Ck)

369
is the One we've been waiting for....

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (C8hzL)

370

.....lied about "shovel ready jobs", then laughed about it.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (MbB0O)

371 wears a coconut bra and does a fantastic hula.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (tGvo7)

372

Romney made his wife proud of America for the first time by winning the Presidency.

Posted by: Z Ryan at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (tsC/8)

373 Under his plan, electricity costs will necessarily skyrocket.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (UOM48)

374 Refuses to place his hand over his heart during the Pledge of Allegiance.

Posted by: Coprse Man at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (ay6+/)

375 Thinks it's cool to toss premature newborn babies in closets to die cold and alone, because picking them up and swaddling them for a few hours might interfere with "abortion rights."

Posted by: HeatherRadish at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (ZKzrr)

376 Gifts the Queen of England with an I- Pod full of pop.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (r2PLg)

377 thinks Debbie Wasaman Schultz is "cute"

Posted by: soothie

 

Actually, she is fetching.

Posted by: A frisbee or a stick at July 12, 2012 12:47 PM (VndSC)

378 Pronounces "Pakistan" like a goof but not "Afghanistan." What's up with that?

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (x2CNJ)

379 When others salute the flag, he salutes his yam-bag.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (sClIO)

380 Made his wife proud of America for the first time by winning the Presidency.

Posted by: Z Ryan at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (tsC/8)

381 Aint putting his hand over his heart for any Honkey Country

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (9TTOe)

382 is one Bad-A Mo' Fo.

Posted by: Samuel L. Jackson at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (qyjnV)

383 stands between the CEOs and the pitchforks.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (0It32)

384 holds his junk during the National Anthem.

Posted by: Vegan Meatball at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (mxnUd)

385 Didn't inhale.

Oh...wait

Posted by: Corpse Man at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (ay6+/)

386 ...makes Narcissus look not so Narcissistic

Posted by: Obama's many composite girlfriends (and boyfriends) at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (F6KtL)

387

bases his investment decisions off of a stocks' profit/earnings ratio

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (8J5Ck)

388 Thinks we should all be driving "green" cars and cutting down on our oil use meanwhile he's driven around in an armored car and flies in Air Force One every time he feels like it

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (1Jaio)

389 Won't let you get a picture taken with him for less than $35,000.  Per family member.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (ZKzrr)

390 buttf*cks the economy

Posted by: Memories at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (JmJSD)

391
is a better speechwriter than his speechwriters

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 12:48 PM (9Q7Nu)

392 Wow...like shootin fish in a bucket.

Posted by: dananjcon at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (mJ0Oh)

393 Gifts the British PM a bunch of DVDs which won't work in Britain.  Has an aide run down to the WH gift shop and buy a couple of cheap toys for his kids.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (UOM48)

394 Resembles like the Joker in his campaign posters, but acts more evil.

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (VJUQK)

395 Has absolutely no experience and is in way over his head.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (G5ubv)

396 Goes long toasting.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (r2PLg)

397 Knows the police acted stupidly.

Posted by: Z Ryan at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (tsC/8)

398 Thinks Solyndra is a success.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (wtHo/)

399 Loves him some choom.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (x2CNJ)

400 Won't get dismayed by one lousy jobs report...or two..or five...or 30.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (C8mVl)

401 shuts down profitable car dealerships.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (4WhSY)

402
can turn a limping economy into a vegetable gimp

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (9Q7Nu)

403 His beast wife lectures us about what we eat but she has an ass the size of Montana

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (1Jaio)

404 Treats voters like individuals too much.

Posted by: Dave S. at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (WY3bD)

405 Can't even swear an the oath of office without a fucking teleprompter.

Posted by: Al at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (MzQOZ)

406 His wife puts her arm around the Queen.  A big no-no.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (UOM48)

407 wants to inflate my tires.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:49 PM (tGvo7)

408 thinks $250,000 makes you a millionaire or a billionaire.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (VndSC)

409

thought he made a funny when he called SJP "Missy Ed" at her 30k/plate fundraiser, then extended a spliff as peace offering

Posted by: kallisto at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (jm/9g)

410 Gets budget advice from Anna Wintour.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (r2PLg)

411 sucks his own dick, LIKE A BOSS!

Posted by: Lonely Island at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (mxnUd)

412 Has (ozFic) as an everlasting sucker of cock and an operative for "Attack Watch"!

Attach that to my dozier, bitch!

Posted by: Full Pint at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (7g1yh)

413 Thinks we can balance the budget by raising taxes on the top 1%.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (Y+wkX)

414 ....refuses to enforce Immigration Laws, then sues States which try to enforce those Laws for him.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (MbB0O)

415 Thinks he can do whatever the fuck he wants with executive orders.

Posted by: El Kabong at July 12, 2012 12:50 PM (G5ubv)

416 has shitty brackets

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (tGvo7)

417 Parties with the Secret Service.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (UOM48)

418 Wife uses unpaid child labor in her garden.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (ZKzrr)

419 Calls Harper the "president" of Canada.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (C8mVl)

420
leaks classified intelligence....  to bump his poll numbers.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (C8hzL)

421 thinks $250,000 makes you a millionaire or a billionaire.

---

Remember when that dipfuck Algore said people who make $250k a year are millionaires after four years?

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (x2CNJ)

422 >>392 Gifts the Queen of England with an I- Pod full of pop.     Don't forget recordings of his own speeches

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (8J5Ck)

423 Will reduce my premiums by 3,000%.

Posted by: Corpse Man at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (ay6+/)

424 Annoyingly whistles his "s"'s.

Posted by: angler at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (SwjAj)

425 Steals from GM non-union retirees and bondholders to give   it  to the UAW

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (1oeZb)

426 Thinks $800 billion is not enough!

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (r2PLg)

427 Chows down on burgers and fries when the wife isn't around.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (UOM48)

428 gives a shit what celebrities think.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:51 PM (tGvo7)

429 If Hillary doesn't trust him, well that's good enough for me! 

Posted by: BurtTC at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (TOk1P)

430 knows how dirty rotten tonsil doctors work when a kid has a sore throat.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (0It32)

431 Drops his "g"'s depending upon the audience.

Posted by: angler at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (SwjAj)

432 has a wife that won't go all the way down

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (G7cU+)

433 Is clean and articulate.

Posted by: Joe Biden at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (ay6+/)

434 444 Annoyingly whistles his "s"'s.



this^^^^^^^^^^^GAH

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (UOM48)

435 Celebrates his Cherokee ancestry.

 (ok, thats off, but I'm running out.)

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (Y+wkX)

436 cynically sets citizen against citzen, for political power no mattert the cost to families or neighborhoods.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (TomZ9)

437 Is off by three years when signing a register at Buckingham Palace.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:52 PM (Wx98x)

438
Seeks to confiscate all evil firearms in America....

----

.....and gives them to Mexican Drug Cartels.....

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (C8hzL)

439 Married Chewbacca.


Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (x2CNJ)

440 "The Middle East is obviously an issue that has plagued the region for centuries."

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (1Jaio)

441 Raises his chin and looks down his nose at the minions God that has always pissed me off.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (9TTOe)

442 Don't forget recordings of his own speeches Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 04:51 PM (8J5Ck) ***** Wait...oh no he didN't? Seriously?

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (r2PLg)

443 Makes the memory of Jimmy Carter seem like good times.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (1oeZb)

444 decided to not go pro,  and to remain an amateur.

Posted by: Roy at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (VndSC)

445

Gets his limo stuck on a speed bump.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (wtHo/)

446 OOPS!  Thing Romney does too much?  Holy crap!  Can we have a thread that reflects what he doesn't do enough of?

Posted by: Full Pint at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (7g1yh)

447 Manages to piss off-- Canada.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (r2PLg)

448 Tilts his head and thrusts his chin in the air.

Posted by: angler at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (SwjAj)

449 Won't rest until every Amercian becomes a ward of the State.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (sClIO)

450 437Wife uses unpaid child labor in her garden.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at July 12, 2012 04:51 PM (ZKzrr)

 

 

While the Labor dept. is trying to regulate what kids who live on Farms can do....

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (lZBBB)

451 Seeks advice from Fareek Zakaria of CNN. 

Weekly.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:53 PM (UOM48)

452 Tries to make us richer by destroying tens of thousands of used cars.

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (HPQnO)

453 Says the private sector is doing just fine.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (C8mVl)

454

While tax payers pay for Michelle Obama and the girls to travel around the globe, Mitt Romney spent time having fun with his family over the 4th of July holiday. (oh my!)

 

Pro-democrat hack media were all over the Romney part.

Posted by: Fresh at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (O7ksG)

455 464  Don't forget recordings of his own speeches
Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 04:51 PM (8J5Ck)

*****

Wait...oh no he didN't?

Seriously?

Posted by: tasker

=============

yep

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (G7cU+)

456 Had a grandmother who was a typical white person

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (1Jaio)

457 "If you like your insurance, you can keep it."  Except we can't.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (UOM48)

458 Pontificates in front of styrofoam columns, like a low-rent Roman emperor presiding at the opening of a Wal-Mart.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (Wx98x)

459 Has a St. Bernard as a senior campaign advisor.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:54 PM (8J5Ck)

460 is the least competent person in any room he enters.

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (mxnUd)

461 Really truly believes he can make oceans recede just from pure awesomeness.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (x2CNJ)

462 ...loves to putt on the green when with Reggie 'Man' Love or Kal 'Giver, Not Taker' Penn

Posted by: Obama's many composite girlfriends (and boyfriends) at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (F6KtL)

463 Isn't alowed to touch his wife's ceremonial Bat'leth without permission.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (I9Qab)

464 matt damon

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (tGvo7)

465

Gives a speech in which he welcomes himself to Norway before realizing he's reading the other asshole's speech off the teleprompter.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (Wx98x)

466 Often gets his kids' ages wrong while using them as political props.

Posted by: Mitt's too many kids that he can't keep straight at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (t/mao)

467 Thinks babies are a punishment.

Posted by: Corpse Man at July 12, 2012 12:55 PM (ay6+/)

468 477 464 Don't forget recordings of his own speeches Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 04:51 PM (8J5Ck) ***** Wait...oh no he didN't? Seriously?Posted by: tasker =============yep Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 04:54 PM (G7cU+) ******** Noooo!! Gawd--I missed that one. I now have a headache.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (r2PLg)

469 He and his wife send their pre-teen daughter on spring break....to Mexico....with a plane load of friends and the Secret Service as baby sitters.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (UOM48)

470 has party member politicians that refuse to be seen with him

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (G7cU+)

471 Made his own campaign presidential seal prior to being elected president

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (8J5Ck)

472 Sings "The wheels on the bus go thump thump thump."

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (x2CNJ)

473 Hires key advisors who look like a fat Hitler with a bad comb-over.

Posted by: Cicero at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (QKKT0)

474 Speaks Austrian.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (r2PLg)

475 Prefers to spend his birthday with his body-man  at the stabbin' cabin rather than at home  with his family.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (I9Qab)

476 Lost out on the Olympics after making a personal appeal.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (1oeZb)

477
Thing unexpectedly happen.

Posted by: YIKES! at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (0xil9)

478 Preezy of the United Steezy.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 12:56 PM (wtHo/)

479 Creates a presidential seal.....for his first campaign.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (UOM48)

480 ....forgets who he has presented the Medal of Honor to....posthumously.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (MbB0O)

481
Downsizes and lops a day off his Parties Convention.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (C8hzL)

482

is the Czar of tsars.

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (mxnUd)

483 stabbin' cabin.... oh crap....

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (r2PLg)

484 ...punishes you financially for not having health care, but it's not a tax!

Posted by: Obama's many composite girlfriends (and boyfriends) at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (F6KtL)

485 When quoting the Declaration of Independence he removes the words, "by their Creator"

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (1Jaio)

486 Is a lying stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable tyrant.

That's all I got, folks.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (UOM48)

487 Won the first prospective Nobel Peace Prize

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 12:57 PM (1oeZb)

488 ...is on the down-low

Posted by: Cricket at July 12, 2012 12:58 PM (2ArJQ)

489 Destroys perfectly good vehicles because of a hoax.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 12:58 PM (d0Tfm)

490 stabbin' cabin.... Oh fuck that's funny.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 12:58 PM (9TTOe)

491 Gives prime ministers movie CD's on state visits,

Posted by: 0ld glazier at July 12, 2012 12:58 PM (Iz6HE)

492 once gave the Loch Ness Monster $3.50

Posted by: Chef Sr. at July 12, 2012 12:58 PM (mxnUd)

493 Pretentiously pronounces Honduras "Hohn-doo-rahs" to seem familiar with Spanish, while not knowing that H's are silent in Spanish.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 12:58 PM (C8mVl)

494 Tries real hard.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 12:59 PM (I9Qab)

495 Does not make a sound when he farts. *there is a reason why too*

Posted by: Truck Monkey at July 12, 2012 12:59 PM (jucos)

496 believes in 'whole lives' value for health care

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 12:59 PM (G7cU+)

497 Shit...it's stabbin' cabin for the block. Lost my train of thought.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 12:59 PM (r2PLg)

498 Oops....here's two more:

Pronounces Pakistan "Pokeestahn"

and Taliban "Tolleebon"

Idiot.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at July 12, 2012 12:59 PM (UOM48)

499 Creates Orifice of the Pre-President

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:00 PM (d0Tfm)

500 On Memorial Day claims he can see dead veterans in the audience

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 01:00 PM (1Jaio)

501 thinks giving a speech in Cairo created the Arab Spring Winter.....wait, on second thought....

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:00 PM (qyjnV)

502 Hates capitalism

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 01:00 PM (1oeZb)

503 ...has weird ideas about the Christian religion

Posted by: Cricket at July 12, 2012 01:00 PM (2ArJQ)

504 Can't beat the headwinds.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:00 PM (wtHo/)

505 Apparently sees dead soldiers in the audience while commemorating Memorial Day with other veterans.

Posted by: the kid from the Sixth Sense at July 12, 2012 01:01 PM (t/mao)

506 Gives prime ministers movie CD's on state visits[/i[ In a format that won't play in Europe.

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:01 PM (evdj2)

507 crap

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:01 PM (evdj2)

508 Single handedly killed the biggest economy the world has ever known Had to be said again

Posted by: Truck Monkey at July 12, 2012 01:01 PM (jucos)

509 Allowed the mother of the soul glow prince from Coming to America to design the new oval office carpeting.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 01:01 PM (9TTOe)

510 Cares more about the Muslim Brotherhood than for the people who pay his salary.

Posted by: MrScribbler at July 12, 2012 01:01 PM (MQc8e)

511 loves to make iReggie sweat

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (0It32)

512 >>517 Gives prime ministers movie CD's on state visits,     Yeah, partially blind prime ministers no less

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (8J5Ck)

513 Thinks that  window is a door.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (d0Tfm)

514

has a private tiny dancer assault people in the capitol showers

deliberately sought out the most marxist folk in college with whom to associate...avoided seeming too white

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (G7cU+)

515 forward

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (tGvo7)

516 ...runs a dirty campaign

Posted by: Cricket at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (2ArJQ)

517 Has all of these gaffes and issues and the MFM willfully ignores them

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (1Jaio)

518 kissed a girl and liked it, but hopes his boyfriend won't mind it.

Posted by: Katy Sumptin at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (mxnUd)

519

Can't get a break from the ATMs.

(yeah, you see what I did there)

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (I9Qab)

520

.....says that the American Flag is a "symbol of oppression, worldwide".

 

 

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 01:02 PM (MbB0O)

521 Loves the Arab Spring.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (wtHo/)

522

knows how to run the olympics.......

how to drink a beer.......

has ate a dog, a hot dog that is.........

Posted by: beer at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (QXzRP)

523 Solemnly tells Harry Reid he's "got a gift".

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (P2Ufm)

524 537Allowed the mother of the soul glow prince from Coming to America to design the new oval office carpeting.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already

================

and got the quotes wrong, too

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (G7cU+)

525 makes speaches over the playing of God Save the Queen cause he thinks the song is about him

Posted by: Rick in MB at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (/CIN4)

526 Thinks 10,000 people died in a Kansas tornado.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (C8mVl)

527
takes a divot.


On the green.

Posted by: fixerupper at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (C8hzL)

528 polls very poorly among dogs.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (tGvo7)

529 Has any mentioned to ugly beast he took as his bear.... er I mean bride yet?

Posted by: Truck Monkey at July 12, 2012 01:03 PM (jucos)

530

God Damn,   that boy can sing!

 

 

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 01:04 PM (I9Qab)

531 Invites terrorists to the WH.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:04 PM (wtHo/)

532 Can't get a break from the ATMs.
(yeah, you see what I did there)
Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 05:02 PM
-----------------------------------
I really need to stop visiting this site at work.

Posted by: Time Travelling Flaneur (Honorary Corpse Man) at July 12, 2012 01:04 PM (ay6+/)

533 Thinks he's a Navy SEAL ...

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:04 PM (GvYeG)

534 Wipes with his left hand, or a couple of small stones.

Posted by: 66chevelle at July 12, 2012 01:05 PM (QjSgY)

535 wants to build a mosque in the rose garden

Posted by: I'machristianohwaitI'mamuslimsometimestoo at July 12, 2012 01:05 PM (/Xv8z)

536

Orchestrated the merger between UNICEF and Smith and Wesson.

Shit, sorry, thats Other Things Bill Brasky Does

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:05 PM (8J5Ck)

537 561Invites terrorists to the WH.

Posted by: Soona

================

well, why not?  started his politickin' career in the living room of 2

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:05 PM (G7cU+)

538 Has any mentioned to ugly beast he took as his bear.... er I mean bride yet? Posted by: Truck Monkey at July 12, 2012 05:03 PM (jucos) ------------------------------------------------- What the fuck was that? I am not even drinking. Has anyone mentioned the ugly.....

Posted by: Truck Monkey at July 12, 2012 01:05 PM (jucos)

539 Sends the bust of the old, fat, imperialist whit guy named Churchill back to england, he didn't match the huggy Bear deco.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (9TTOe)

540 Accuses Nancy Reagan of holding seances.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (C8mVl)

541 Mooch's theme song:

http://tinyurl.com/3tn2ztd

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (x2CNJ)

542 Is sensitive about his ears. Is just trying to buy shrimp, leave him alone.

Posted by: David C. at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (ZtMso)

543

Used other people's money to take over businsesses, then shut them down

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (1oeZb)

544 damnit 534 ... I was going' for that one ... well done!

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (GvYeG)

545 does whatever his wife says

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (tGvo7)

546 Thinks I am fat, too.

*looks for shoulder to cry on*

Posted by: Kate Upton at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (t/mao)

547 Speeches that are assemblages of throat-clearing cliches and strawmen.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (sClIO)

548 never takes responsibilty for his decisions that fail , blames others for anything  that He fails at, like a five year old.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (TomZ9)

549 Wants to bowl from the ladies tees.

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 01:06 PM (HPQnO)

550 Loves him some George Soros.

Posted by: mediumheadboy at July 12, 2012 01:07 PM (x2CNJ)

551 Thinks the phrase "my brother's keeper" comes from the Sermon on the Mount.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:07 PM (C8mVl)

552 Mitt Romney snorts coke off the asses of middle age men as a prelude to barebacking every anonymous cornhole he lays eyes upon. Then Mitt Romney induces pregnancy and dumps the still live babies in the trash (cause he made it legal)...all before his 2nd round of 18 for the day!

Posted by: Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure at July 12, 2012 01:07 PM (qxcKC)

553

has a wife that's an awesome dresser (awesomely bad)

and she has amazingly toned arms (the better to put him in a headlock)

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:07 PM (G7cU+)

554 This is fun.  It's not me.

Posted by: The Chicken at July 12, 2012 01:08 PM (wtHo/)

555 Sends a thrill up Chris Matthew's leg

Posted by: David C. at July 12, 2012 01:08 PM (ZtMso)

556 576 Thinks I am fat, too.

*looks for shoulder to cry on*   ----   I have a very comfortable shoulder right here between my thighs..

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 01:08 PM (HPQnO)

557 Mitt Romney turned me into a newt.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:08 PM (Hcvyb)

558 Is not unfamiliar with the taste of penis.

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:08 PM (evdj2)

559 Shuts down US drilling, then sends taxpayer dollars to fund Brazillian drilling

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 01:08 PM (1oeZb)

560 hires a brazilian singer to be head of his hispanic outreach

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:09 PM (G7cU+)

561

He tries real hard!!!

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:09 PM (GvYeG)

562 Is allegedly a tremendous athlete but any scenes of him playing sports is laughable

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 01:09 PM (1Jaio)

563 I loved by Meggy McCain.

Posted by: The Chicken at July 12, 2012 01:09 PM (wtHo/)

564 Did he ever call himself an "artist"?

For some reason, this article has me enraged.

http://huff.to/LcOsPW

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 01:09 PM (piMMO)

565 Obsessed by the concept of people paying their 'fair share,' but has yet to define 'fair' once.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (sClIO)

566 Outsources NASA fights to the ISS

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (d0Tfm)

567 Slow jams the news

Posted by: David C. at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (ZtMso)

568 He drinks mead!!!!

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (GvYeG)

569 Is loved by Meggy McCain.

Posted by: The Chicken at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (wtHo/)

570

Had his opponents removed from primary ballots

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (1oeZb)

571 supplies fodder until the next post.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (tGvo7)

572 Makes his wife wear dropcloths cinched up with WWE championship belts.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (Wx98x)

573 Shit.  Fights=Flights.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (d0Tfm)

574

had to surrender his law license, but won't say why.

 

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:10 PM (G7cU+)

575 Mitt Romney slashed the tires on a meals on wheels van just because he could.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:11 PM (Hcvyb)

576

Site is slipping took until 112 for

 

SCOAMT

Posted by: Fair Tax Forever at July 12, 2012 01:11 PM (gZVu4)

577 Stammers

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:11 PM (evdj2)

578
cause I'mmmmm

sooo-oh In Love with yoooooo.

Posted by: Mitt Romney at July 12, 2012 01:11 PM (C8hzL)

579 Had a bunch of non-doctors dress up in doctor's coats to pretend they supported his health insurance reforms.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 01:11 PM (P2Ufm)

580 Throws a 50 foot fastball.

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:12 PM (evdj2)

581 597Outsources NASA fights to the ISS   

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 05:10 PM (d0Tfm)

 

 

To a country he just declared such a threat due to Nuclear Material stockpiling, that he had to sign an Executive order declaring it a State of Emergency...

 

 

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 01:12 PM (lZBBB)

582 Is a lifelong smoker and former drug enthusiast while his wife berates the American people for eating hamburgers.

Posted by: Dorian Taupe at July 12, 2012 01:12 PM (IfM3l)

583 608Stammers

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag

=============

perhaps something damaged his uvula???

(ref to ancient SNL with gilda radner)

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:12 PM (G7cU+)

584 Knows all the dance moves to Poker Face

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:12 PM (8J5Ck)

585 I just signed up for a Twitter account and @theDemocrats leads me to the official Democrat twitter account.

@theDemocrats. leads me to a place with IowaHawk, etc.

What's the difference?

Also, I was only given the chance to "follow" someone on initial signup. How do I sign up to "follow" other ppl?

Posted by: Confused at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (7+pP9)

586 Believes Muslims have done something worth a shit for society.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (9TTOe)

587 Hates the Jooooooos!

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (GvYeG)

588 Romney? He loves him some Mayora Taveras!

Posted by: David C. at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (ZtMso)

589 Mitt Romney once shot a man for serving him overcooked quiche.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (Hcvyb)

590 Doesn't laugh unless it's at somebody.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (wtHo/)

591 Will change NASA's mission to focus on outreach to Mormons.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (P2Ufm)

592

Smokes everyone's weed.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 01:13 PM (I9Qab)

593 He can't jump!

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:14 PM (GvYeG)

594 wants to sen muslims into space okay

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:14 PM (tGvo7)

595 Throws up bricks.

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:14 PM (evdj2)

596

Releases his tax returns.

 

...has that one been done yet?

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:14 PM (XiVKO)

597 tells everyone he grew up poor and had to sleep in HoJo's

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:14 PM (G7cU+)

598 Does a full court press to get--Olympic fail.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (r2PLg)

599

Sends out four donation-solicitation emails in a day.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (XiVKO)

600 Always politely offers to push in your stool at the bar.

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (evdj2)

601 Gives guns to narco-terrorists ...

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (GvYeG)

602 Mitt Romney cheats and makes up words when playing Scrabble.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (Hcvyb)

603 Works less than Ace.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (I9Qab)

604 is not a conservative, unlike mee!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (8J5Ck)

605 Can't believe he couldn't find a fat white girl to marry like the rest of his friends.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 01:15 PM (9TTOe)

606 Loves vulgar jokes told at press dinners.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:16 PM (wtHo/)

607 Pre-emptively accepts Nobel Peace Prize.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:16 PM (r2PLg)

608 Toasts the Queen of England for Seriously Awkward Periods of Time

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:16 PM (XiVKO)

609

Waxes his legs ...

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:16 PM (GvYeG)

610 Becomes the poster boy for Anorexia Presidentia.

Posted by: Damon Bailey at July 12, 2012 01:16 PM (UgmA1)

611 Thinks a bullet train will answer everything.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (r2PLg)

612 Uses Just for Men, IYKWIM

Posted by: toby928© pushes the tag at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (evdj2)

613 Last one picked for basketball at the G-20.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet has been drinking already at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (9TTOe)

614

....granted 30 year waivers to Wind Farms, for killing Bald Eagles.

 

[Which....if Romney ever *did do* such a thing, the greenies would go apeshit crazy over.]

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (MbB0O)

615 Invents girlfriends for his book

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (1Jaio)

616 is sooooooo sad

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (8J5Ck)

617

Geez, it's been a long three-plus  years.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:17 PM (wtHo/)

618 Plays basketball like a goof, throws a baseball like a girl, golfs like a hack, rides a bike like a nerd, bowls like a blindman,, spells like a tard, pronounces words like an imbecile, lies like a rug, smokes like a chimney, governs like a communist, whines like a baby, deflects like a shield, smell like shit.

Posted by: polynikes at July 12, 2012 01:18 PM (L2I78)

619 Skips NAACP conferences ...

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:18 PM (GvYeG)

620 Screws up getting an umbrella through a gate.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:18 PM (XiVKO)

621 doesn't want us to call his bluff.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:18 PM (tGvo7)

622 loses bid for re-election?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 01:18 PM (HPQnO)

623 is a BFD?

Posted by: cajun carrot at July 12, 2012 01:18 PM (UZQM8)

624 Sneers at a president that had twice his brains and 10x his class.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (C8mVl)

625

Will confiscate your fork

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (d0Tfm)

626 Mitt Romney sends DVD's of his speeches out as stocking stuffers.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (Hcvyb)

627 Owes his office to Oprah.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (r2PLg)

628 I'm tapped out.  I'm sure there's more, though.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (wtHo/)

629 Has a pants-crease that could slice wagyu!

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (XiVKO)

630 >>>Uses Just for Men, IYKWIM Down there?

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:19 PM (tGvo7)

631 thinks geri ryan is a stuckup beotch

Posted by: cfh13 at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (W4M5J)

632 Held a real job.

Did other things before he thought he should be president.

Doesn't call every opponent a racist.

Doesn't hang out with Marxists.

Has verification on his website donation form.

Believes in the private sector.

Believes in America.


Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (MMC8r)

633 Tweets remarks beneath the POTUS ...

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (GvYeG)

634 Mitt Romney had a chairman Mao Christmas tree ornament on his tree.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (Hcvyb)

635 657---" Sneers at a president that had twice his brains and 10x his class." Thank you.

Posted by: Rutherford B Hayes at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (C8mVl)

636 658 Will confiscate your fork --while advocating bringing the guns to a knife fight.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (r2PLg)

637 One-term president.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (wtHo/)

638 Has a Brother living in a 6' x 8' hut in kenya he doesn't send any money to

Posted by: ConcealedKerry or SubMitt at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (vXqv3)

639 Spent the first two years of his presidency forcing through a "healthcare" plan that the majority of Americans didn't want, an idiot from San Fran said they had to pass to find out what is in it, so far will be 3x what it originally was supposed to cost and will turn our healthcare system into a Euro one

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 01:20 PM (1Jaio)

640 Chooses Joe Biden as a running mate because he needs intellectual heft on the ticket.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:21 PM (XiVKO)

641 Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 05:20 PM

Please don't make us have to explain irony.

Posted by: Ian S. at July 12, 2012 01:21 PM (tqwMN)

642 Probably doesn't  think we're having fun  with this  right now.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:21 PM (d0Tfm)

643 Mitt Romney secretly met with the Dali Lama at a garbage dump and offered him a snort of sterno.

Posted by: Purp (@PurpAv) at July 12, 2012 01:22 PM (Hcvyb)

644 promised to be a one-term president...

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:22 PM (G7cU+)

645 Is gonna let Bill Clinton finish this presser.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:22 PM (XiVKO)

646 Stop.  For God's sake, stop.

Posted by: A Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 01:22 PM (QKKT0)

647 Punches above his weight class.

Posted by: Marmo at July 12, 2012 01:23 PM (pcgW1)

648

incite  others, to get in other citizens faces.

 

being called enemies.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:23 PM (TomZ9)

649 Has an aunt living in the projects and on the taxpayer dime, who is here illegally and an uncle who got thrown in the slammmer for dwi

Posted by: ConcealedKerry or SubMitt at July 12, 2012 01:23 PM (vXqv3)

650 Stop. For God's sake, stop.

Posted by: A Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 05:22 PM (QKKT0)

--------

Better thee than me....

Posted by: The Chicken at July 12, 2012 01:23 PM (C8hzL)

651 Needs YOU to fight all those damn dirty lies your conservative neighbors  and family members are spreading by going to www.attackwaaaaatch.omg!

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (XiVKO)

652 thinks we built an Intercontinental Railroad.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (tGvo7)

653
Please don't make us have to explain irony.

Posted by: Ian S. at July 12, 2012 05:21 PM (tqwMN)


It's comment first, read last around here.

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (MMC8r)

654 Has an illegal immigrant uncle that name drops him after being pulled over for being shit-faced while driving.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (8J5Ck)

655

O/T

 

From SpaceWeather.com:

"X-FLARE! Big sunspot AR1520 unleashed an X1.4-class solar flare on July 12th at 1653 UT. Because the sunspot was directly facing Earth at the time of the blast, this is a geoeffective event. Stay tuned for updates about possible CMEs and radio blackouts."

 

Oh great.....this should be incoming, tomorrow....on Friday the 13th.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (MbB0O)

656 Stores his dirty tapes in the LATimes vault.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (C8mVl)

657 shudders at the thought  of burdensome grandchildren.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:24 PM (XiVKO)

658 Wants us ALL to live like his brother... the one in Kenya...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 01:25 PM (lZBBB)

659 Thinks every sentence can be improved by judiciously and commandingly using multiple adverbs.

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 01:25 PM (HPQnO)

660 posts zero content threads and disappears.

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at July 12, 2012 01:25 PM (mxnUd)

661 Oh great.....this should be incoming, tomorrow....on Friday the 13th.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 05:24 PM (MbB0O)


Yeah. Heh.

Posted by: The Mayans at July 12, 2012 01:25 PM (QKKT0)

662 jinx!  owe me a coke!

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:25 PM (TomZ9)

663 Oh great.....this should be incoming, tomorrow....on Friday the 13th.

----

tic toc tic toc

Posted by: Mayan Calendar at July 12, 2012 01:25 PM (C8hzL)

664 Can't wear a porkchop around his neck so the dog, who is afraid he will eat him, will play with him,. cause he is a Mooslim!

Posted by: ConcealedKerry or SubMitt at July 12, 2012 01:26 PM (vXqv3)

665 Has a sitting Senator from his party lobby against having the party convention in her state.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:26 PM (GvYeG)

666 Grows his own weed in the WH garden.  Think globally, act locally.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:26 PM (qyjnV)

667 Uses FelonsRUs  for all his real estate needs

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:26 PM (d0Tfm)

668 So incredibly worldly that he bungles 'Cinco de Mayo'.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:26 PM (FcR7P)

669 Doesn't miss his wife after the space traders take her.

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at July 12, 2012 01:27 PM (HPQnO)

670 Has a 'composite' girlfriend, IYKWIMAITTYD.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:27 PM (FcR7P)

671 Trys real hard so should get a second term!

Posted by: ConcealedKerry or SubMitt at July 12, 2012 01:28 PM (vXqv3)

672

thinks free birth control is more important than  old peoples health.

"time to take a pill"

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:28 PM (TomZ9)

673 Has his Sec of State, when in China, apologize for Arizona's immigration law.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:28 PM (C8mVl)

674

Romney doesn't golf!

BTW, this just in from Bain:

It must be hard for them to answer because the ceo of bain is a
bundler for 0b0z0.
This has to get around!

Bain Capital: Romney left in Feb. 1999

By DYLAN BYERS |
7/12/12 1:50 PM EDT

Bain Capital sends the following statement, following today's Boston
Globe article reporting that MItt Romney was CEO there until 2002:


Mitt Romney left Bain Capital in February 1999 to run the Olympics and
has had absolutely no involvement with the management or investment
activities of the firm or with any of its portfolio companies since
the day of his departure. Due to the sudden nature of Mr. Romney's
departure, he remained the sole stockholder for a time while formal
ownership was being documented and transferred to the group of
partners who took over management of the firm in 1999.  Accordingly,
Mr. Romney was reported in various capacities on SEC filings during
this period."

Posted by: n0b0z0 at July 12, 2012 01:28 PM (rsOPT)

675 Recycles his own campaign speeches...saving the environment one speech at a time.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:28 PM (qyjnV)

676 Has an Attorney General who ignores and breaks the law

Posted by: TheQuietMan at July 12, 2012 01:29 PM (1Jaio)

677 promises foreign leaders he'll be more flexible after the election

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:29 PM (G7cU+)

678 --attended a religious school

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 01:29 PM (oZfic)

679 Posted by: Confused at July 12, 2012 05:13 PM (7+pP9)


****

What's your handle?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 01:29 PM (piMMO)

680 another 1000 post thread

Posted by: Rick in MB at July 12, 2012 01:29 PM (/CIN4)

681

Finally got this roaring 357 Cyclone of an economy OUTTA THA DITCH!

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:30 PM (XiVKO)

682
the Boston Globe is a joke paper

Posted by: soothie at July 12, 2012 01:30 PM (9Q7Nu)

683 steals Pepsi's logo

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:31 PM (tGvo7)

684 Failed to make the Special Olympics Tapioca Eating Contest. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:31 PM (Ec6wH)

685 Keeps Cynthia McKinney in the WH attic.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:31 PM (qyjnV)

686 Insults Denmark

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:31 PM (Ec6wH)

687 Has a pr0n pic of his mom.

Posted by: Soona at July 12, 2012 01:32 PM (wtHo/)

688 Hugs Hugo Chavez.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:32 PM (C8mVl)

689 marry a woman that calls america a mean country publically to His followers.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:32 PM (TomZ9)

690 Insults Ireland

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:32 PM (Ec6wH)

691 reads less than W

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:32 PM (tGvo7)

692 Puts his feet up on the Queen Anne Desk...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 01:32 PM (lZBBB)

693

Can't speak Austrian

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:33 PM (Ec6wH)

694 Identifies everyone in his apocryphal past by their race.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:33 PM (FcR7P)

695 ...just wants to finish his damned waffles

Posted by: Time Travelling Flaneur (Honorary Corpse Man) at July 12, 2012 01:33 PM (ay6+/)

696 Gives his national security team Presidential Seal condoms.......but they always leak.

Posted by: Nukie at July 12, 2012 01:33 PM (yU1Dt)

697 ...just wants to be clear.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:33 PM (XiVKO)

698 Uses nautical metaphors in his two autobiographies despite not being a sailor.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 01:34 PM (P2Ufm)

699 Puts his feet up on the Queen Anne Desk...Posted by: Romeo13

Resolute Desk?

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 01:34 PM (sClIO)

700

Smells badly.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:34 PM (GvYeG)

701 knows shit's bad right now, with all that starving bullshit, and the dust storms, and we are running out of french fries and burrito coverings.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:34 PM (tGvo7)

702 As a little boy went to Pleasure Island for Lying and came back as a Jackass!

Posted by: ConcealedKerry or SubMitt at July 12, 2012 01:34 PM (vXqv3)

703 Wow, this has the makings of a Declaration of Independence...at least George III was certifiably insane. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:35 PM (Ec6wH)

704 Warned you about evil foot-choppin' doctors!

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:35 PM (XiVKO)

705 Doesn't.Drink.Mead.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:36 PM (GvYeG)

706 Doesn't tip ozFic the customary 10% for a BJ. Claims it's because they don't make coins smaller than 1 cent.

Posted by: joust me at July 12, 2012 01:36 PM (ggRof)

707 will be your own personal Jesus......for only $38,500 per plate.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:37 PM (qyjnV)

708 fondly remembered, when remembered at all, as a stoner.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:37 PM (FcR7P)

709 Gets rid of the scholarship program for DC kids, saying he's "supporting public schools" ---while sending his own kids to ultra-exclusive Sidwell Friends.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:37 PM (C8mVl)

710 745 Doesn't tip ozFic the customary 10% for a BJ. Claims it's because they don't make coins smaller than 1 cent.

Posted by: joust me at July 12, 2012 05:36 PM (ggRof)

doesn't tip and leaves his guests with the bill......

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 01:37 PM (oZfic)

711 makes us actually miss Bill Clinton

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:38 PM (tGvo7)

712 Actually made Canada seem well run by comparison.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 01:38 PM (OQpzc)

713 Makes us miss Jimmy Carter

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:38 PM (Ec6wH)

714

Is a SCOAMF!

 

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:38 PM (GvYeG)

715 stiffs rib joints.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:39 PM (tGvo7)

716 Likes to vote "present"!

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:39 PM (GvYeG)

717 Makes me miss LBJ

Posted by: LBJ's Beagle at July 12, 2012 01:40 PM (Ec6wH)

718

thinks a personal person s success is fundamentally wrong (if they don't vote for him). and thinks they should be penalized for success.

and believe it is HIS job to punish success.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:40 PM (TomZ9)

719 has his press secretary emphatically decree that releasing college transcripts is preposterous

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:40 PM (G7cU+)

720 Makes me miss the plague

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:40 PM (GvYeG)

721 probably hates death metal.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:41 PM (tGvo7)

722 Thinks Penn State is the 'Littaly Lions' and the White Sox play at 'Kominsky Field'

Posted by: Schwalbe: The Me-262© at July 12, 2012 01:41 PM (UU0OF)

723 Looks funny.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:41 PM (GvYeG)

724 Makes Justice Smails look like Arnold Palmer

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:41 PM (Ec6wH)

725

Posted by: weft cut-loop at July 12, 2012 05:34 PM (sClIO)

 

Doh.... and his stupid is so contagious... its affecting ME!!! AAARGGHHH!

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 01:41 PM (lZBBB)

726 Hugs the owners of his campaign stops to death.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 01:41 PM (P2Ufm)

727 Less than 250 posts to go.  We can do this morons.  You are the ones you've been waiting for.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:42 PM (qyjnV)

728 761Makes me miss the plague

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead

=============

makes me yearn for SMOD

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:42 PM (G7cU+)

729

Sticks his pinky out drinking beer.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:42 PM (GvYeG)

730 Doesn't like hugs and kisses. 

Posted by: Jerry Sandusky at July 12, 2012 01:42 PM (Ec6wH)

731 Has an aunt living in the projects and on the taxpayer dime, who is here illegally and an uncle who got thrown in the slammmer for dwi also here illegally. Are there any members of the Obama clan who actually obey the law?

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 01:43 PM (QupBk)

732 Uses the Stalin method of the memory hole: Had Rev. Wright and Father Pfleger prominently displayed on his website as "people of faith for Obama"--- until their extreme racism and antisemitism was made known and they "disappeared" from the site.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:43 PM (C8mVl)

733 Can't believe racist white-America could ever bring itself to vote for a black man.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:44 PM (8J5Ck)

734 Had to receive coaching to speak somewhat like "his people", with whom he shares nothing.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:44 PM (FcR7P)

735 Makes us miss John Kerry.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:44 PM (9221z)

736 has a wife that uses Beyonce for workout music.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:44 PM (tGvo7)

737 Are there any members of the Obama clan who actually obey the law?

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 05:43 PM

=====================

 

the brother in the kenyan shack-nasty?

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:44 PM (G7cU+)

738

fishy.org, or attackwatch.

 

not creepy at All!

asks his constituents  for emails of those who dissent.

 

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 01:45 PM (TomZ9)

739 Doesn't know how to salute properly.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:45 PM (GvYeG)

740 Looks more bat-like each day.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 01:45 PM (OQpzc)

741 Campaigned for president in Berlin.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:45 PM (C8mVl)

742 Okay. After playing a bit in the Twitter litter box I'm learning the ropes. More accurately, the ropey stools.

Posted by: Confused at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (7+pP9)

743 had to be coached on how to properly salute.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (tGvo7)

744 Raffles himself off for dinner "dates".

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (r2PLg)

745 Thinks the entire fucking universe and everything in it belongs to him including your  money  and your  thoughts

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (d0Tfm)

746 Sends his money and his mistress to the Caribbean.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (9221z)

747 Appointed a slow-footed, weak-hitting left fielder to the SCOTUS. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (Ec6wH)

748

782Doesn't know how to salute properly.

==========================

won't come near us unless he needs photo ops

clears the room when he wants to speechify downrange

Posted by: eurw at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (G7cU+)

749 Holds a beer summit, because real manly-men hang out and drink beer together, amirite?

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (8J5Ck)

750 Encourages campaign workers and supporters to be thugs.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:46 PM (GvYeG)

751 thinks the grand prize in a national $3 lottery would be dinner with him.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:47 PM (FcR7P)

752 While campaigning in Berlin, said that Europeans aren't used to seeing someone looking like him represent the US --- forgetting that our last 2 Secs of State were black.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:47 PM (C8mVl)

753 Has blue lips from smoking.

Posted by: JIm Sonweed at July 12, 2012 01:47 PM (5z33c)

754 creates car-mageddon in LA for the 99% while he schmoozes the 1%.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 01:47 PM (qyjnV)

755 hates Paul Ryan.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:48 PM (tGvo7)

756 Disables verification software to facilitate illegal campaign donations

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:48 PM (9221z)

757

Wants to turn the Navy into the Good Ship Lollipop.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 01:48 PM (OQpzc)

758 Gets a BJ from ozFic and makes his guests pay the bill. They don't really mind because he only accounted for 1/100 of the total bill that night.

Posted by: joust me at July 12, 2012 01:48 PM (ggRof)

759 has more TV face time than Walter Cronkite.

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 01:48 PM (QupBk)

760 Ate my pizza.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:48 PM (GvYeG)

761 Has a 150 pound chipmunk as his main adviser.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (C8mVl)

762 Supports the PEPCO billing system

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (9221z)

763 Suggests engaged couples register with his campaign.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (Wx98x)

764 Looks more bat-like each day.Posted by: Invictos

You mean like this?
www.moonbattery.com/obama-batboy.jpg

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (sClIO)

765

Made his commerce secretary take the blame for his DUI. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (Ec6wH)

766 Wants the military to pay more for their healthcare.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (GvYeG)

767 805 Has a 150 pound chipmunk as his main adviser.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 05:49 PM (C8mVl)


Iranian Chipmunk thank you very much.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:49 PM (9221z)

768 Let Ernest Borgnine die. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:50 PM (Ec6wH)

769 is from Keynesia.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:50 PM (tGvo7)

770

>>While campaigning in Berlin, said that Europeans aren't used to seeing someone looking like him represent the US --- forgetting that our last 2 Secs of State were black.<<

 

Hell, just the opening phrase is enough. "Campaigning in Berlin??" Does he think the krauts get to vote here?

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 01:50 PM (Wx98x)

771 Is doing more than any other president in history to destroy what's left of my liver

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:50 PM (d0Tfm)

772 Wants to cut defense programs but forces navy to spend $26/gal on biofuels.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:50 PM (C8mVl)

773 Actually "gets" Paul Krugman.

Posted by: tasker at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (r2PLg)

774

Happy thought!

 

Let's call the "Obama lied about me" ad a trial balloon. McCain never dared take much of a swipe at The One. The worst I remember him doing was calling him a "celebtity".

 

Once they learn that a black man can be criticized, and as we get close enough to the election for people to remember, he can move in for the kill.

 

Instead of saying "he lied about me", they can ratchet it up to "he lied to YOU" - making heavy use of Obama clips of Obama saying stuff everybody now knows are not true.

.

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (As94z)

775 Let Ted Kennedy stay dead.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (9221z)

776 He HAS kept Abe Vigoda alive

Posted by: Truck Monkey at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (jucos)

777 According to new Pew Research Poll showing Obama leading by 7, ONLY 24% OF AMERICANS ARE REPUBLICANS!!!!

Don't they wish.

Will someone PLEASE expose this fraud?

Posted by: Bill Mitchell at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (hlUJY)

778 Has Bolshevik inspired campaign posters

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (8J5Ck)

779 Got a great job performance appraisal from his boss, George Soros.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at July 12, 2012 01:51 PM (Wx98x)

780 Is such a genius that his takeover of healthcare will lower your premiums by 3000%!

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:52 PM (FcR7P)

781 Damn, this election is getting amusing.

Right on cue, local leftie parrots the "Mitt is a felon!!!" line on the FB.

He, he, he. Right buddy. Go with that.

That JEF, sure is running on his record isn't he?

But seriously, it is stupid how obvious it is what they are doing--it's the only play the JEF has, the only play he has ever won with: smear, smear, and smear hard, fast and early.
Like I said earlier: The last time I recall this level of panic, anger and fear was just after the Palin VP announcement.

Something has got these rats spooked as hell. They're reading the leftie blogs, out there on the front line of what the left is thinking--and some sub-current they won't say out loud has them rattled.

Moar pleez.

Posted by: RoyalOil at July 12, 2012 01:52 PM (kSaUf)

782 Decorates his acceptance  speech stage like a Greek god

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:52 PM (d0Tfm)

783 Is pretty sure you've made enough money....now.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:52 PM (q/kmn)

784 Let the head of the IRS and the chairman of the ways and means committee get away with tax fraud.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:53 PM (9221z)

785 let Dog the Bounty Hunter get canceled.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:53 PM (tGvo7)

786

Ruined Facebook. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 01:53 PM (Ec6wH)

787 Sends Michelle to represent the US at the Olympics because godonlyknows she needs another expensive vacation on our dime.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:53 PM (C8mVl)

788 Spent $787 BILLION and now has an unemployment rate of 6% to show for it.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:54 PM (q/kmn)

789 Used his marriage to show that Klingons and Humans could find common ground.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:54 PM (9221z)

790 such a historic figure (or toddler) that every thing he does is "unprecedented!"

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:54 PM (FcR7P)

791 Makes us miss Jimmah Carter, Joseph Stalin and Idi Amin.

Posted by: Mouse Tongue at July 12, 2012 01:54 PM (VJUQK)

792 Pronounces Iwo Jima as "Iwo Hima".

Posted by: No wait, that was Substitute Spanish teacher Peggy Hill at July 12, 2012 01:55 PM (5z33c)

793 ...still needs your last three dollars...seriously...

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:55 PM (q/kmn)

794 Showed Bush what "Miserable Failure" really means!

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:55 PM (9221z)

795

hates you so much, Ace.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:55 PM (8J5Ck)

796 Makes me miss Arafat.

Posted by: Honey badger, drinker of mead at July 12, 2012 01:55 PM (GvYeG)

797 Keeps using words like "transparency" and "fair" that do not mean what he thinks they mean

Posted by: Inigo Montoya at July 12, 2012 01:55 PM (P2Ufm)

798 Wants you to watch Spanish soap operas that encourage you to go on food stamps...

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 01:56 PM (oZfic)

799 choked Mama Cass

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 01:56 PM (QupBk)

800 Ensured Breitbart's immortality

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 01:56 PM (9221z)

801

Has his face on "commemorative" puzzles in the WalMart toy aisle that are still on $1 clearance, three years later...

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 01:56 PM (q/kmn)

802 is taking the NAACP for granted

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 01:57 PM (oZfic)

803 handles the tough off-Prompter questions with a forceful, Presidential-quality "come on, guys!"

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:57 PM (FcR7P)

804 donkey punched the economy.

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at July 12, 2012 01:57 PM (mxnUd)

805 Can't stand the fact that there is ONE channel out of dozens that does not continuously slobber over him. Obsesses about it.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 01:57 PM (C8mVl)

806 while kissing up to LaRaza....

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 01:57 PM (oZfic)

807

Named his dog after his initials

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 01:57 PM (8J5Ck)

808 divides, tries to conquer

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 01:58 PM (tGvo7)

809 Compares the economy to  a car despite the fact that he can't change a  flat tire because the tire iron is heavy

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 01:58 PM (d0Tfm)

810 Relies on a group of pre-teen beer-pongin' speechwriters for his sparkling rhetoric.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 01:58 PM (sClIO)

811 is the kiss of death at sporting events. He picked you? You're dust.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 01:59 PM (FcR7P)

812 Uses gerbils as suppositories.

Posted by: No wait, that's Barney Frank at July 12, 2012 01:59 PM (5z33c)

813 reads the comments at politico

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 02:00 PM (oZfic)

814 Promised to hold legislative deliberations in open, then turned around and made a bunch of back-room deals to get the private sector to sign on to his boondoggles.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 02:00 PM (P2Ufm)

815 Rides a bike with flat tires with helmet all while being douche bag.Oh and mom jeans to boot.
 

Posted by: SOMEASSHOLESTOLEMYPEN at July 12, 2012 02:00 PM (YYmZm)

816 Constantly says "It's not about me," something other presidents have not felt compelled to say.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:00 PM (C8mVl)

817 Asked Ray Allen to teach Rajon Rondo how to shoo ta jump shot.

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 02:00 PM (8J5Ck)

818 Believes his own press.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 02:00 PM (OQpzc)

819 Permits flies to land on his face.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 02:01 PM (q/kmn)

820 Drove his car in a ditch while wearing purple lipstick and drinking a Slurpee.

Posted by: OldTexasChic at July 12, 2012 02:01 PM (k2qj/)

821 Thought marrying a Sasquatch would make for a great beard.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 02:01 PM (sClIO)

822 believes everything on msnbc

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:02 PM (tGvo7)

823 Decorates the Oval office in a style one (very pro-Obama) designer called "reminiscent of a lobby in an upscale Holiday Inn."

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:02 PM (C8mVl)

824 Has a bus with monster truck tires

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 02:02 PM (9221z)

825 I give free haircuts, so don't fuck around.

Posted by: Buzzcut Romney at July 12, 2012 02:02 PM (z9HTb)

826

 is the kiss of death at sporting events. He picked you? You're dust.

 

I was watching the Women's World Cup Final....the US was up well into the game, and the dingy announcer says that Obama was watching the match...and like an atomic bomb freeing Godzilla, the Japanese rose up to defeat our girls. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:02 PM (Ec6wH)

827 permits Glee to continue airing.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:02 PM (tGvo7)

828 Turns to Nancy Pelosi for significant legislation authorship.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 02:03 PM (q/kmn)

829 Gives speeches and doesn't notice the fly walking around on his face

Posted by: Jack Rackim at July 12, 2012 02:03 PM (VZn5B)

830 Insults SCOTUS at the SOTU address.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at July 12, 2012 02:03 PM (WItBr)

831 once told Michelle "Of course that dress doesn't make you look fat."

Posted by: Uncle Milty at July 12, 2012 02:04 PM (8J5Ck)

832 Aarrgghh!! inverse joke hurt caveman programmer brain needs !(joke)

Posted by: DaveA at July 12, 2012 02:04 PM (864A5)

833 Dissed Benjamin Harrison. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:04 PM (Ec6wH)

834 Needs you to  wait for him until the end of Entourage...

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 02:04 PM (q/kmn)

835 Best one yet about the PSU scandal (stolen from Fark):

What's the newest fraternity at Penn State?

Nambla Felta Thigh.

Posted by: Shameless Thief at July 12, 2012 02:04 PM (7+pP9)

836 Can't dunk a basketball.

Posted by: Jack Rackim at July 12, 2012 02:04 PM (VZn5B)

837 Personally got Firefly canceled.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 02:05 PM (OQpzc)

838 ROOOOTHERFEERRD HAYEZZzZZZZZ!!!!!

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at July 12, 2012 02:05 PM (sClIO)

839

O/T

 

Antibiotics in Chicken....causing 'superbugs' which are resistant to antibiotics.

 

Linky to video at FoxNews, in my sig.

 

This is why I no longer eat chicken from KFC. ....They use Tyson chicken exclusively now.....and Tyson is one of the worst ones about feeding antibiotics to their chickens. 

 

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 02:06 PM (MbB0O)

840 Tries to show solidarity with the Argentine thugocracy by calling the Falklands the Malvinas --- but ends up calling them the Maldives.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:06 PM (C8mVl)

841 Realizes that Bobby Gibbs isn't as convincing a spox as he originally thought,  and then replaced him with Jay Carney.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 02:06 PM (q/kmn)

842 If I get this thread over 1000 comments, I get a stock bonus. I'll use the profits to buy ATVs for my grand-children.


You think the community organizer could pull that off?

Posted by: Mitt Romney at July 12, 2012 02:06 PM (z9HTb)

843 Thinks his wife is a fashion icon.

Posted by: jewells45 at July 12, 2012 02:06 PM (UljOc)

844 Needs a vacation after all this exhaustive fundraising and golfing.

Posted by: reason at July 12, 2012 02:07 PM (q/kmn)

845 thinks Abe Lincoln is a homeboy

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:08 PM (tGvo7)

846 Flies his barber in from Chicago every two weeks. WTF? He has a buzzcut. A monkey on acid could cut his hair.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:09 PM (C8mVl)

847 Invents the "Office of the President-elect" in order to give himself stature.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at July 12, 2012 02:09 PM (WItBr)

848 Focuses too much on policy when he should be focused on his "story".

Posted by: Lizzy at July 12, 2012 02:09 PM (2ucnU)

849 Rode the bus with dear Granny and sis and swam in the pool at the HOJO.Oh.. he loves him some ice making  machines...

Posted by: the pink cracker formerly known as the hobbit Donna at July 12, 2012 02:10 PM (ZHge+)

850 I hear they will copy my business plan for the Salt Lake City games in Chicago for 2016.


What? Oh, I'm so sorry. I thought it was a lock.

Posted by: Mitt Romney at July 12, 2012 02:10 PM (z9HTb)

851 Advised Geraldo to open Al Capone's underground vault in Chicago.

Posted by: Jim Sonweed at July 12, 2012 02:10 PM (5z33c)

852 If, under extreme duress he decided to jump off a building, his ears would make sure he had a soft landing.

Posted by: jewells45 at July 12, 2012 02:11 PM (UljOc)

853 Got Wicked Pinto banned for life.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:11 PM (Ec6wH)

854

889 Realizes that Bobby Gibbs isn't as convincing a spox as he originally thought, and then replaced him with Jay Carney.

 

I thought Gibbs got shit-canned for making that snarky remark about "the Institutional Left".

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 02:11 PM (MbB0O)

855 uses Air Force One as a pizza delivery truck

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:11 PM (FcR7P)

856

Turned healthcare reform over to the Lizard People.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 02:11 PM (OQpzc)

857 Rules the "special olympics" class

Posted by: Rick in MB at July 12, 2012 02:12 PM (2ocJB)

858 Still claims his mother wasn't treated for cancer because she didn't have health insurance, though this has been demonstrably proven false.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:12 PM (C8mVl)

859 O/T... I don't want to hear Portman or Ayotte mentioned as VP prospects again: @trscoop: Law of the Sea Treaty, is your Senator supporting it? You might be surprised --> http://t.co/uBDDSA1r #tcot

Posted by: Y-not at July 12, 2012 02:13 PM (5H6zj)

860 Chugs a Schlitz Malt Liquor before sex.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:13 PM (k1XCX)

861 Thinks The Newsroom is reality instead of the fantasies of a coked out Hollywood loser named Sorkin.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at July 12, 2012 02:14 PM (WItBr)

862 . . . doesn't release his medical records because they would prove his nuts have atrophied from constant exposure to Valerie and Michelle (and he misses Reggie)

Posted by: Natasha at July 12, 2012 02:14 PM (jU5uf)

863 Chugs a Schlitz Malt Liquor before sex. Before? Oh, right, we're talking about Romney...

Posted by: Kal Penn at July 12, 2012 02:14 PM (FcR7P)

864 Gets the Cheech, Chong and Choom munchies every time "Nice Dreams" comes on Turner Movie Classics.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at July 12, 2012 02:14 PM (0It32)

865 dances like a white guy

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:14 PM (tGvo7)

866 surrounds himself with criminals

Posted by: phoenixgirl, team dagny at July 12, 2012 02:15 PM (Ho2rs)

867 Needs the "Jaws of Life" to be extricated from Chinese Finger Puzzles.

Posted by: Jim Sonweed at July 12, 2012 02:15 PM (5z33c)

868 Often asks himself, "What would Mao do?"

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 02:16 PM (OQpzc)

869 Cries after sex.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:16 PM (k1XCX)

870 makes Jimmy Carter smile.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:16 PM (tGvo7)

871 Made sure  all   his Cabinet  members  had as little private sector experience as possible, just like him

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 02:16 PM (d0Tfm)

872 Has a video games czar. Nuf said.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:17 PM (C8mVl)

873 sleeps through the 3am phone call.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:17 PM (tGvo7)

874 Added choom-stuffed shrooms to White Douse dinner menus.

Posted by: Jim Sonweed at July 12, 2012 02:17 PM (5z33c)

875 when shown 'commanding', looks completely baffled by an operation he claims he authorized. In fact, looks like the last person to be invited.

Posted by: Kal Penn at July 12, 2012 02:17 PM (FcR7P)

876 probably hated Tron.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:18 PM (tGvo7)

877 Gets take-out pizza with a 747.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 02:18 PM (I9Qab)

878 Tries to run out the clock until after the election on Fast and Furious.

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 02:19 PM (lZBBB)

879 Told the House Democrats they didn't have to worry about the 2010 election turning out like the 1994 one because this time "you've got ME."

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:19 PM (C8mVl)

880 bogarts that joint.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:20 PM (tGvo7)

881

Does not take ANY responsibility for the things his own administration does.

 

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 02:20 PM (lZBBB)

882 Spells possum with an O and an apostrophe.

Posted by: Invictos at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (OQpzc)

883 Sucked a roadie's cock to get backstage at a Bell Biv  DeVoe  concert.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (I9Qab)

884 Once said: "Over the last three years, weÂ’ve opened millions of new acres for oil and gas exploration."

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (VJUQK)

885 Wears nice pants

Posted by: David Brooks at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (r2y+f)

886 doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he prefers Zima.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (FcR7P)

887 has Whoopi make excuses for him.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (tGvo7)

888 Cries like a bitch at the end of Lions For Lambs.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:21 PM (k1XCX)

889 Quoting: "
717 another 1000 post thread

Posted by: Rick in MB at July 12, 2012 05:29 PM (/CIN4)"

Getting real close!


Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:22 PM (VJUQK)

890 Bought a shitload of Lucite chairs to use in the State Dining Room because they're hip and modern and stuff.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:22 PM (C8mVl)

891 . . . speaks Indonesian

Posted by: Natasha at July 12, 2012 02:22 PM (jU5uf)

892 will never be on a minted coin. That's worth anything.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:22 PM (tGvo7)

893

OK, in the spirit of the War on Dogs, and then the War on Women, this nonsense about Romney's alleged felony also ricochets off.

 

If Romney has committed a felony, Obama's not doing his job, since his boy Holder should be having him arrested. Nobody - either side - is holding their breath waiting for that to happen.

 

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (As94z)

894 Hates work like ace hates women.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (k1XCX)

895 Prevented Color Me Badd from performing at the Inauguration. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (Ec6wH)

896 giggles inside every time he says "economic head winds"

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (FcR7P)

897 Doesn't "read too much" into one month's jobs report, for 36 months straight.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (P2Ufm)

898

908O/T...

I don't want to hear Portman or Ayotte mentioned as VP prospects again:

@trscoop: Law of the Sea Treaty, is your Senator supporting it? You might be surprised --> http://t.co/uBDDSA1r #tcot

 

Posted by: Y-not at July 12, 2012 06:13 PM (5H6zj)

 

---------------

 

Yeah, Y-not.

Both the LOST treaty and the UN Gun Control treaty, need to be shot down.

I wasn't thrilled with the idea of either Portman or Ayotte for the VP slot, before this....so now, definitely not.

 

And Rubio has screwed the pooch with all his talk about his own version of the Dream Act.

Which is why I keep coming back to Allan West.

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (MbB0O)

899 Can't tell when a microphone is hot  or a camera is on a press conference with a Russian

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (d0Tfm)

900 Cries like a bitch at the end of Silence of the Lambs.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:23 PM (tGvo7)

901 Has big Mommy and Grandmommy issues

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:24 PM (kXoT0)

902 Messed up that last post...hate that!

Oh...and had to take back the "jobs saved or created" claim

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:24 PM (VJUQK)

903 Likes to make highly staged pronouncements to the press ---like the amnesty one in Rose Garden, e.g. --- but will NOT open the floor to questions.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:24 PM (C8mVl)

904 just can't seem to find the right monosyllabic words and grunts to express his ideas to his followers so that they want to flush the country down the toilet in following a failed economic theory at the cost of tens of trillions of dollars.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:25 PM (QxSug)

905 Has sex with his teleprompter cuz he knows what's good for him.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:25 PM (k1XCX)

906 Has his own wife out him as having such bad hygiene that he stinks!

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:25 PM (kXoT0)

907 Looks like the incredible shrinking man next to his wife.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:25 PM (kXoT0)

908 doesn't admit when he uses a ghostwriter

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:25 PM (QxSug)

909 treats and talks  to citizens as if they are inferior beings that couldn't do a thing without his help.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (TomZ9)

910 Has a rat living in  his podium

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (d0Tfm)

911

Doesn't have to face Helen Thomas. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (Ec6wH)

912 taps his toes waiting for a new thread.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (tGvo7)

913 Hides his mother's "colorful" past. (by colorful I mean whorish)

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (k1XCX)

914 Loves crunchy figs.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (I9Qab)

915 Makes Bill Clinton look honest, and Jimmy Carter look competent...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (lZBBB)

916 Puts (smelly) feet on desk in the oval office.

Posted by: rusticbroad at July 12, 2012 02:26 PM (FjF3P)

917 Uses his wife to sew up the critical Sasquatch, Yeti, Swamp Thang, and Wookie vote.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (kXoT0)

918 Announces he has the most open & transparent administration in history in a closed door meeting.

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (qyjnV)

919 928 when shown 'commanding', looks completely baffled by an operation he claims he authorized. In fact, looks like the last person to be invited.     That's so unfair to say. It takes ANYBODY a while for their eyes to adjust to being inside, after being dragged off the golf course. 

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (As94z)

920 TOTUS is more credible than POTUS

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (VJUQK)

921 Has an even UGLIER woman in the Whitehouse than Bill Clintons intern...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (lZBBB)

922 Has no  gag reflex.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (I9Qab)

923 Has large, unexplained scars on his pointy little head.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:27 PM (kXoT0)

924 1000th post get a year free AosHQ membership.  Don't be # 999

Posted by: AndrewsDad at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (vYJuY)

925 Thinks pronouncing Pakistan as "Pok-e-stahn" makes one sound educated instead of just sounding like a pretentious twit.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (aY3VP)

926 sux ass.

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (mxnUd)

927 Doesn't hire blacks to run his campaign. 

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (Ec6wH)

928 Quoting #983: "Uses his wife to sew up the critical Sasquatch, Yeti, Swamp Thang, and Wookie vote."

...no..his wife IS the critical Sasquatch, Yeti, Swamp Thang, and Wookie vote.

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (VJUQK)

929 24 more days until the first NFL game of the season!

I don't even care that it's a preseason game. Bring it on!!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (piMMO)

930 Gets his prostate checked 3 times a day.

Posted by: garrett at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (I9Qab)

931 Morons  on fire!  A 1000 post on an afternoon thread?

A new low has been reached.

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (KZI7g)

932 Is so inept that ValJar and Michelle tell him what to do and when to do it.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (kXoT0)

933 Practices his Muslim faith in secret.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (k1XCX)

934 is a fucking retard.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:28 PM (FcR7P)

935 Because he does not have an American Upbringing... thinks he IS the Gipper.

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (lZBBB)

936 Post 1000??

Posted by: Cowfish at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (qyjnV)

937 thread death in 5... 4... 3... 2...

Posted by: Beefy Meatball at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (mxnUd)

938 off by one

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (KZI7g)

939 Yay...1,000!

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (VJUQK)

940 is glad we're past 1000.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (tGvo7)

941 Would suck the embalming fluid out of Lenin's corpse if given the chance.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (aY3VP)

942 We win!

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (FcR7P)

943

and finally.... because he likes Crossbows better than Longbows...

Posted by: Romeo13 at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (lZBBB)

944 Has a rat living in his podium soul

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:29 PM (piMMO)

945 damnit!

Has a rat living in his podium soul

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (piMMO)

946 I won!  Free membership for my birthday.  I would like to thank all the ugly members of the obama family and administration that made this birthday dream come true.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (kXoT0)

947 Thinks the key to a world-beating economy is hiring more cops and firefighters to bolster our key policing and firefighting industries.

Posted by: BS Inc. at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (P2Ufm)

948 has to be told it isn't  'his muslim faith, but 'his christian faith " by a journalist

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (TomZ9)

949 Would suck the embalming fluid out of Lenin's corpse if given the chance.

****

You're saying he hasn't?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (piMMO)

950 is waiting for someone to wake up Ace.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (tGvo7)

951 Takes a half day at the drop of a hat.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:30 PM (k1XCX)

952 Hey, Happy Birthday WNAFF!

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (Ec6wH)

953

Always uses the term "fiscal responsibility" at least 50 times, before pissing away another half a Trillion dollars.

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (As94z)

954 will soon be the first black ex-president.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (tGvo7)

955 Quoting Romeo13: "and finally.... because he likes Crossbows better than Longbows.."

...because longbows take too much work, and crossbows are for pansies.

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (VJUQK)

956 Ace is drunk, it's past noon right?

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (k1XCX)

957 In other news: Conservative blogger, Ace of Spades was found passed out on his toilet while a horde of morons took a zero content thread past 1,000 comments. Details at 11:00.

Posted by: Fake News Guy at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (mxnUd)

958 Drops no-content threads and leaves them up for hours until the ONT.

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (MMC8r)

959 Eats dog or, straps them on the roof or...i don't know. It's all so complicated.

Posted by: Time Travelling Flaneur (Honorary Corpse Man) at July 12, 2012 02:31 PM (ay6+/)

960 lets you be clear about things he's always said when he's not clear and hasn't really said or explained those things before in the first place.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:32 PM (QxSug)

961

wow , we did it! wipes forhead .

hopefully we earned a new thread.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 02:32 PM (TomZ9)

962 lets the terrorists win.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at July 12, 2012 02:33 PM (tGvo7)

963 Did not break any bones during the Klingon mating ritual.

Posted by: howcome at July 12, 2012 02:33 PM (KgDYO)

964 constantly railing about crumbling infrastructure while driving a car that weighs as much as a WWII tank when infrastructure is not crumbling anyway

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:33 PM (QxSug)

965 knows that the thread will change before any uncomfortable questions get asked.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:33 PM (FcR7P)

966 drudge is back to color!  what happened to black and white and why was it only black and white....?

"Developing...

ROMNEY NARROWS VP CHOICES; SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER"

Posted by: just me at July 12, 2012 02:33 PM (oZfic)

967 996 wrote "Quoting #983: "Uses his wife to sew up the critical Sasquatch, Yeti, Swamp Thang, and Wookie vote."

...no..his wife IS the critical Sasquatch, Yeti, Swamp Thang, and Wookie vote."

No, she is not the entire vote, just the monthly centerfold every month, she rocks the CreepCheek feature to the max.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:34 PM (kXoT0)

968 Mitt Romney is a  Satisfactorily Competent Official and Mormon Fellow.

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 02:34 PM (MMC8r)

969 Thinks pancakes will get you laid.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:35 PM (k1XCX)

970

said he would reduce the deficit , instead he  doubled down.

i don't believe he went through it line by line iether.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 02:35 PM (TomZ9)

971

ROMNEY NARROWS VP CHOICES; SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER"

Levi Johnson?

Suprise!

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 02:35 PM (MMC8r)

972 Known for 10,000 word rants followed by 2,000 word apologies.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:36 PM (k1XCX)

973 Thinks pancakes will get you laid.


****

Well, is there peanut butter on those pancakes?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:36 PM (piMMO)

974 Misprounces the elvish Lord's name Celeborn as Seleborn rather than Keleborn.

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:36 PM (VJUQK)

975 Buying shrimp is one of Mitts highest priorities.

Posted by: Sonnyspats at July 12, 2012 02:36 PM (Qr9Rc)

976

Derides people for saying he was born in a foreign contry, after having made the same claim himelf, to sell books. (Do we have to stop now, we're just getting warmed up?!)

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:37 PM (As94z)

977 ROMNEY NARROWS VP CHOICES; SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER"


Levi Johnson?

Suprise!


****

Nickless, that's twice in one day I've quote you on Twitter

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:38 PM (piMMO)

978 would've had a better term if only he hadn't violated every rule of economics to pay off his criminal coconspirators, i mean donors.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:38 PM (QxSug)

979 Believes foul mouthed, talking sandwiches is the wave of the future.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:38 PM (k1XCX)

980 sara palin? todd palin?

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:38 PM (QxSug)

981 Drudge headline: "ROMNEY NARROWS VP CHOICES; SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER"

Helen Thomas?

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:38 PM (VJUQK)

982 You folks still here? This has got to be some sort of record for longest, midweek, non-controversial thread.

Posted by: Y-not at July 12, 2012 02:39 PM (5H6zj)

983 VP Guess?

Jay Thomas, Helen's ugly liberal love child?

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:40 PM (kXoT0)

984 Is this the three-word story thread?

Posted by: Waterhouse at July 12, 2012 02:40 PM (61WCK)

985
Nickless, that's twice in one day I've quote you on Twitter

What was the first?

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 02:40 PM (MMC8r)

986 SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER Joe Biden? He's available.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:40 PM (FcR7P)

987 Is Ace on another secret VRWC conference call this aftenoon?

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 02:40 PM (QupBk)

988

Rick Perry?

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at July 12, 2012 02:40 PM (Ec6wH)

989 The amazing thing is that we went over 1000 comments with very, very few repetitions. Obama is really that bad.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at July 12, 2012 02:41 PM (C8mVl)

990 devalued American currency to fake boost value of stock market while leaving behind crippling debt and hidden inflation.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:41 PM (QxSug)

991 Who sadly shares a birthday today with me...all though he is older.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:41 PM (kXoT0)

992 ROMNEY NARROWS VP CHOICES; SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER 'The American People'?

Posted by: TIME Magazine at July 12, 2012 02:41 PM (FcR7P)

993 Nickless, that's twice in one day I've quote you on Twitter

What was the first?


****

NAMBLA NAMBLA NAMBLA

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:42 PM (piMMO)

994 Dick Cheney.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:42 PM (k1XCX)

995 Dick Cheney, FTW!

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:42 PM (FcR7P)

996 1067

Good, I was wondering if anyone noticed that one.

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 02:42 PM (MMC8r)

997 VP Guess?

Hillary or Bill?

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:42 PM (kXoT0)

998 Somehow boosted stock market numbers while causing silver to triple, gold to double, and platinum to explode, thereby rendering stock market gains meaningless...oh, and lets the Ben Bernake make interest rate like .25% killing ROI. http://t.co/gCPEjuua

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:43 PM (QxSug)

999 will have Roman columns supplied by his benefactor NWO proponent G.Soros at his acceptence speech venue.

Posted by: Sonnyspats at July 12, 2012 02:43 PM (Qr9Rc)

1000 ROMNEY NARROWS VP CHOICES; SURPRISE NAME EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER

I've always thought Zombie Ronald Reagan would be a good VP.

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:43 PM (VJUQK)

1001 Christina Hendricks.

Posted by: Dr Spank at July 12, 2012 02:44 PM (k1XCX)

1002 Rick Perry?


*****

I would be happy with the choice, but he doesn't bring any votes to the table.

If he picked a running mate who is black, then black voters can escape their guilt over abandoning Obama for a honkey.

Allen West? Condi Rice?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:44 PM (piMMO)

1003 The talking bust of Winston Churchill.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:44 PM (FcR7P)

1004 Dick Cheney, FTW! Hmm, experienced, articulate, cool under pressure, willing to shoot a friend in the face at need, and with a new heart, courtesy of Travelon. I say go for it.

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 02:45 PM (QupBk)

1005 You know, I know Surprise Name, and he's a good egg.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 02:45 PM (9221z)

1006 C'mon, Drudge...quit holding us in suspenders!

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:46 PM (VJUQK)

1007 Surprise VP: Seamus, the dog that lived.

Posted by: Dodge Report at July 12, 2012 02:46 PM (mxnUd)

1008 Good, I was wondering if anyone noticed that one.


****

It received a retweet as well.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:46 PM (piMMO)

1009 precided over the first United States rating downgrade.

Posted by: willow at July 12, 2012 02:47 PM (TomZ9)

1010 Romney's VP?  

Kevin Bacon.  Everybody loves bacon.

Posted by: Mmmmm bacon at July 12, 2012 02:47 PM (qyjnV)

1011 lolz, I like that joke, stealing it. Has Mr. Name, Surprize been vetted enough? Time will tell.

Posted by: joeindc44 says choom on fuckers at July 12, 2012 02:47 PM (QxSug)

1012 #1084 Thread Winnah!

Posted by: Guy who declares, "Thread Winnah!" at July 12, 2012 02:48 PM (mxnUd)

1013 1063 The amazing thing is that we went over 1000 comments with very, very few repetitions.
Obama is really that bad.       You sound surprised!     Did we hit the part about "called massive debt unpatriotic, and then doubled it"

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:48 PM (As94z)

1014 Said he would read every word of every bill he signed into law like the 2,500 pages of Obamacare he read in less than 48 hours. [Or whatever the exact page count is for the obamanation.]

Posted by: andycanuck at July 12, 2012 02:48 PM (vDl/w)

1015 C'mon, Drudge...quit holding us in suspenders! Errr, uhh, didn't expect you guys to break 1000 so fast...

Posted by: drudge at July 12, 2012 02:48 PM (FcR7P)

1016 XCOR Aerospace moves its RD operation to Midland, TX from Mojave, CA. Posted by: RioBravo at July 12, 2012 04:22 PM (eEfYn) I has a sad. :-(

Posted by: Peggy Noonan at July 12, 2012 02:49 PM (9wOfB)

1017 C'mon is Surprise Name less believable a name than Reince Priebus?

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 02:49 PM (9221z)

1018 Surprise VP: Matt Damon!

Posted by: Matt Damon! at July 12, 2012 02:49 PM (mxnUd)

1019 Sock be gone!

Posted by: Mary in LA at July 12, 2012 02:49 PM (9wOfB)

1020 Quoting: "Has Mr. Name, Surprize been vetted enough? Time will tell." 

Believe me, the LSM with "vet" whoever he/she is...you can take that to the bank...er, dog pound!

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:49 PM (VJUQK)

1021 How about Rick Snyder?

Conservative in a Dem state who is also taking on the unions.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:50 PM (piMMO)

1022 Whew! Whoever typed that commentin' is hard wasn't kidding. It's  time  for a cold Guinness...

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at July 12, 2012 02:50 PM (d0Tfm)

1023 Ace is back from the conclave.

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 02:50 PM (QupBk)

1024 maintains a marital relationship with a woman who thinks that a saddle cinch is a fashionable way to lift saggy boobs, - a.k.a. "dressage."

Posted by: Fritz at July 12, 2012 02:50 PM (02fNe)

1025 C'mon is Surprise Name less believable a name than Reince Priebus? Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 06:49 PM (9221z) Would you believe he has two brothers named Lather and Repeat?

Posted by: Mary in LA at July 12, 2012 02:50 PM (9wOfB)

1026 Surprise Name is a right-wing extremist!!!

(Start now, why wait?)

Posted by: nickless at July 12, 2012 02:50 PM (MMC8r)

1027 Dick Cheney!  Woot!

Posted by: Zharkov at July 12, 2012 02:51 PM (4lvcW)

1028 Surprise VP: Luap Nor

Posted by: Alien Overlord Counsel of Pain at July 12, 2012 02:51 PM (mxnUd)

1029 Surprise Name: Jon Lovitz! "Economy in flames. I'll go play golf. Yeah, that's the ticket!"

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:51 PM (FcR7P)

1030 Where I grew up, Surprise was actually someone's last name and the guy owned the local hardware store.  He loved to laugh about owning, Surprise Hardware, you never know what you will find.

Posted by: Will Not Assimilate For Food at July 12, 2012 02:52 PM (kXoT0)

1031 XCOR Aerospace moves its RD operation to Midland, TX from Mojave, CA.


****

Somebody's moving their business FROM Texas TO California?

With leadership like that, I give them a year. Tops.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:52 PM (piMMO)

1032 #1086...Nah...I think with this particular thread, only Obama-bashing posts should be eligible (admitting that #1084 was still pretty doggone good)

Posted by: Mr_Write at July 12, 2012 02:52 PM (VJUQK)

1033 Doesn't want his daughter punished with a baby...

Posted by: runningrn at July 12, 2012 02:52 PM (WGmy2)

1034 1099 C'mon is Surprise Name less believable a name than Reince Priebus?

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 06:49 PM (9221z)

Would you believe he has two brothers named Lather and Repeat?

Posted by: Mary in LA at July 12, 2012 06:50 PM (9wOfB)


And none of them have Dandruf.

Posted by: Iblis at July 12, 2012 02:53 PM (9221z)

1035 new post

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 02:53 PM (piMMO)

1036

Somebody's moving their business FROM Texas TO California?

 moves its RD operation to Midland, TX from Mojave, CA

 

Other way around.

Posted by: Infidel at July 12, 2012 02:53 PM (O/fK8)

1037 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at July 12, 2012 02:53 PM (Xb3hu)

1038

Doesn't know how magnets work.

 

... no, wait. That's the other guy.

 

Posted by: Max Entropy at July 12, 2012 02:54 PM (alV7J)

1039 runningrn, go read all the comments first! You'll find we've moved on.

Posted by: t-bird at July 12, 2012 02:54 PM (FcR7P)

1040 gnu thread

Posted by: wheatie at July 12, 2012 02:54 PM (MbB0O)

1041 Has a wife who photo-op shops at Target!

Posted by: runningrn at July 12, 2012 02:54 PM (WGmy2)

1042

Tells this sad story about telling his daughter that he's trying to plug the hole, when he didn't even call BP for a month and a half, and wouldn't even let Costner use his gadget.

 

Honestly, somebody should have made a billion dollars by airing a sitcom parady of this Administration. You just can't make this stuff up, and there's SO MUCH of it.

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:54 PM (As94z)

1043

Hasn't had a cabinet meeting since January.

 

 

(Maybe it doesn't count - the czars of the Shadow Government probably run everything anyway).

Posted by: Optimizer at July 12, 2012 02:57 PM (As94z)

1044 Dines 'n dashes.

Posted by: NC Ref at July 12, 2012 03:03 PM (/izg2)

1045 Somebody's moving their business FROM Texas TO California?
moves its RD operation to Midland, TX from Mojave, CA

Other way around.


****

"Reading"...I'll have to check into that someday.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at July 12, 2012 03:04 PM (piMMO)

1046 Neglects to pass a budget because he's too busy short-shanking into the nearest bunker.

Posted by: Fritz at July 12, 2012 03:06 PM (02fNe)

1047 Doesn't explain his success enough.

Posted by: toby928© at July 12, 2012 03:08 PM (QupBk)

1048 Sometimes forgets about how bad the economy he should be blaming on Bush is.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at July 12, 2012 03:15 PM (WItBr)

1049 Has a Connecticut social security number when he claims to have been born in Hawaii.

Posted by: Chicago Voter at July 12, 2012 03:34 PM (qZb8X)

1050 Says Mulligan at every tee.

Posted by: Beto at July 12, 2012 03:56 PM (BAnPT)

1051 oops

Posted by: Jane's New Phone Overlord at July 12, 2012 04:45 PM (pASI9)

1052 "It's dead, Jim."

Posted by: This thread at July 12, 2012 05:27 PM (5z33c)

1053 Says your racists  if you use his middle name, don't vote for his bills, criticize him, his policies, or his fugly wife!

Posted by: ConcealedKerry or SubMitt at July 12, 2012 05:45 PM (nonzP)

1054 Has mother in law as permanent white house staff. More interest in one murder in Florida, than the 100's in his hood. Wants photo ID 's for his show boating and plane riding but not for voting. Careless with allies, respectful to enemies. Treats republicans with I Won, and has the nerve to say they don't want to work with him. Will forever be known as pResident, with lazy work ethic for focusing on his next job assignment. Will be underemployed Jan. 19, 2013.

Posted by: Overthetop at July 12, 2012 07:45 PM (C9O2e)

1055

Had maintenance staff at golf course lower ball washers since he could not jump up that high.

Found out the ball washers were for his golf balls.

Posted by: Tazman44 at July 13, 2012 10:17 AM (w3/i6)

1056 1129 comments and Romney is STILL not the SCOAMF!

Posted by: Blacksmith8✡ at July 13, 2012 03:28 PM (nlRaq)

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