Ace of Spades HQ

November 16, 2012

Review: Twillight-- Breaking Dawn Part 2 Is An Unexpectedly Exciting Vampire Romp
— Ace

Three and a half stars. Full review below the fold.

Come on. I did not see "Twilight- Breaking Dawn Part 2" for God's sake.

Do you think so little of me?

Posted by: Ace at 10:02 AM | Comments (264)
Post contains 55 words, total size 1 kb.

1 We thought maybe you did.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:02 AM (GQ8sn)

2 This time I *knew* London Boys would pop up.

Posted by: logprof at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (jKE+Z)

3 I know. I know.

Posted by: ace at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (LCRYB)

4 Admit it, you really did go see, and you loved it.

Posted by: sdavis at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (njVMI)

5 thank God!

I was beginning to worry about your sudden interest in sparkly vampires

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (piMMO)

6 I knew you were going to do that.

Posted by: Batman at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (bRdb3)

7 Nah,
I knew it was gonna be London Boys but clicked anyway.
What I don't get is who pays Heather to link the birds?

Posted by: DaveA at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (MOWP1)

8 I knew that was what it was going to be and still I clicked.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Coming not nearly soon enough. at November 16, 2012 10:03 AM (VtjlW)

9 You all are a bug of bleery homophobes and bigots. It's enough to turn me non-libertarian.

Posted by: K M at November 16, 2012 10:04 AM (jKE+Z)

10 i just read the review at breitbart and was all like "Wha? huh?" Apparently this is the last movie-- allegedly. It's only been four years, that review claimed. Could that be true? Did Twilight coincide with the beginning of Obama's desolations? It seems like longer than that.

Posted by: ace at November 16, 2012 10:04 AM (LCRYB)

11 I knew what was coming.

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at November 16, 2012 10:04 AM (P7hip)

12 Ace, did you happen to catch the movie version of "The Trip" or did you watch the eps?

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:05 AM (GQ8sn)

13 I was having so much fun with Poundhamasmovies on twitter that in my distraction I actually believed.

Posted by: typo dynamofo at November 16, 2012 10:05 AM (+VMZ0)

14 How comes there's two London Boys but only one set of legs?

Posted by: Kensington at November 16, 2012 10:05 AM (znT2j)

15 Did you think so little of us that we would not see through the ruse so quickly?

Posted by: Hal at November 16, 2012 10:05 AM (MftY/)

16 I saw the movie "The Trip." It's good.

Posted by: ace at November 16, 2012 10:05 AM (LCRYB)

17 I'm hoping I can see The Hobbit in the theater over Christmas. That's only if we can get family to babysit. Other than that, I don't see myself going out to see a movie in the next several months.

Posted by: logprof at November 16, 2012 10:06 AM (jKE+Z)

18 OT, but that Jill Kelley bimbo apparently ate at the White House 3 times this year. See Drudge/Daily caller

Posted by: eureka! at November 16, 2012 10:06 AM (UL+ny)

19 I never imagined Derek Jeter to be a catcher, but that picture says otherwise

Posted by: The Q at November 16, 2012 10:06 AM (w4fEE)

20 After what Ace wrote for Prometheus you expected a brief below the fold review of Twilight? Whoever fell for this, can we pull your again? This time to see if it falls off.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (5CDzH)

21 So this is a stealth open thread? Anyway, Roger Simon (the good one, not the commie fuck) over at PJ Media wrote an open letter to Bibi, volunteering for the IDF. I'd go to, if they'd have my 52 year old, out of shape butt.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (XkWWK)

22 I haven't seen anything on it yet...

Did you guys catch the FNC piece yesterday about Jill Kelly attempting to extract a broker fee for helping a company secure rights to drilling in South Korea? (IIRC it was drilling)

She claimed that she could make arrangements at the highest levels of government and then demanded an $80 MILLION fee. Which immediately signaled to the head of that company that she had no fucking clue what she was doing and he ended talks post haste.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (piMMO)

23 I knew it! Ace likes the Rocky franchise but there's no way in hell he'd be into Twilight.

Posted by: soothie at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (ZZuvz)

24 Didn't get me this time, Ace. Knew when you said "Twilight" that shit was about to get teh ghey.

Posted by: eastvalleyphx at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (GRvW4)

25
So, you deny that you're a SCOAMF? So does Obama, I hear.

Posted by: J. Moses Browning at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (DAfG4)

26 go see skyfall

Posted by: Thunderb at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (Dnbau)

27 Come on. I did not see "Twilight- Breaking Dawn Part 2" for God's sake.

Do you think so little of me?

I was hoping you'd take one for the team because the review would be awesome.

But I wasn't surprised by the London Boys.

Posted by: Meiczyslaw at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (4+LTj)

28 19 I never imagined Derek Jeter to be a catcher, but that picture says otherwise Posted by: The Q at November 16, 2012 02:06 PM (w4fEE) And I had no idea Mickey Rivers was a pitcher.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at November 16, 2012 10:07 AM (XkWWK)

29 It NEVER gets old!

Posted by: Truck Monkey at November 16, 2012 10:08 AM (jucos)

30 14 How comes there's two London Boys but only one set of legs?

Posted by: Kensington at November 16, 2012 02:05 PM (znT2j)

Guess the one in back is really in the back... IYKWIM

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:08 AM (5CDzH)

31 Ace is the Official Proctologist of the London Boys

Posted by: TexasJew at November 16, 2012 10:08 AM (lD8ju)

32 I saw the movie "The Trip." It's good.

Ace, you need to re-watch the episode versions instead. There is soooo much more in there that was cut out for the movie. Altogether, there's an hour's worth of material left out of the movie version.

"You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!!!"

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:08 AM (GQ8sn)

33 Search YouTube for the spoony experiments review of breaking dawn part one. It is 90 minutes and worth every second as he rips on the movie while getting drunk. Hope does it for part 2

Posted by: buzzion at November 16, 2012 10:08 AM (+gS9F)

34 I was actually excited to see the London Boys. The other option, of Ace seeing and then reviewing Twilight? HORRIFYING.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:09 AM (da5Wo)

It's only been four years, that review claimed. Could that be true? Did Twilight coincide with the beginning of Obama's desolations?

It seems like longer than that.

Posted by: ace at November 16, 2012 02:04 PM (LCRYB)

-------------

Yeah, it does seem longer than that.

But then Barky-Years are like dog years.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 10:09 AM (ICEh3)

36 How comes there's two London Boys but only one set of legs?

*****

Glory hole?

A really big one?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:09 AM (piMMO)

37 I was actually excited to see the London Boys.

We will make you regret typing that.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (GQ8sn)

38 Barky Years are like Moochelle Years.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (5CDzH)

39 Maybe we'll get someone else on here calling us bigots for laughing at the london boys.

Posted by: Adam at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (/YJYi)

40 Not that it's getting old, but I saw that one coming.

Posted by: i am mad as hell - period at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (cgxNI)

41 >>Do you think so little of me?

Lately I'm trying not to think at all.

......what's your name again?

Posted by: ontherocks at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (aZ6ew)

42 What's not to love? Shitty female lead character with only 2 facial expressions: horny and scared Lead male character is nothing but a robot there to fulfill teenage girls fantasies by barely talking and being madly in love with th female character to the point her stalker tendencies are pale in comparison and thus ok. Secondary male character who never wears a shirt and serves as a plot vehicle for shirtless people. Intetchangeable villains whose main focus seems to be bad fashion and getting in between the horny teenage girl and her mute boyfriend for no other reason than that they are old fuddy duddies who frown on inter racial relationships. Also powers that make the lead female character super cool and awesome and have no downside. Her dad also let's her out all night to bang her boyfriend because he is super cool and doesn't care if his daughter stays out all night being a whore as long as they are friends.

Posted by: Mr pink at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (1PF/K)

43 I've heard it's the best of the series. Seriously though, the outdoor photography in these movies is usually pretty nice. They make a tolerable rental when combined with plenty of adult libations.

Posted by: Max Power at November 16, 2012 10:10 AM (q177U)

44 I'm old and not hip. So I have to ask. What is the London Boys reference about?

Posted by: USA at November 16, 2012 10:11 AM (RIg+t)

45 We will make you regret typing that.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 02:10 PM (GQ8sn)

Lol.

Did you see my wife's facebook rant that I posted in the last thread?

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:11 AM (da5Wo)

46 Sorry, every time I see "Jill Kelley" I think of Jill Kelly

and Twinkies.

of which my grocer was out

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:12 AM (8sCoq)

47 EXPENDABLES 2 review: This is a spoof, right? Arnold Schwarzenegger is not even good enough to be an awful actor. Arnold is no kind of actor. Everyone except for Jason Statham and Jean Claude Van Dam makes no effort to act. Van Dam is pretty good in his role, oddly enough, and carried the movie and the only reason it qualifies as a legit feature action film is because of Van Dam.

Posted by: soothie at November 16, 2012 10:12 AM (BIKWJ)

48 I knew this was a Rick Roll . . . everybody knows the title of the movie is "Breaking Wind - Part 2."

Posted by: The Poster Formerly Known as Mr. Barky at November 16, 2012 10:12 AM (qwK3S)

I don't know the backstory of the london boys joke, but I laugh every time.

I'm conflicted though because i just learned they are dead from a car crash and left behind childrens. Sad. But I'll still laugh I am sure.

Posted by: California Red at November 16, 2012 10:12 AM (icSBv)

50 This thread is only gonna keep alive the "Is Ace ghey?" question.

Posted by: cool cal at November 16, 2012 10:12 AM (VDovR)

51 This is what keeps me sane, surprisingly. All politics in this circling-the-drain country would truly drive me mad. Thanks, ace.

Posted by: red sweater at November 16, 2012 10:13 AM (CUi62)

52 I'm old and not hip. So I have to ask.
What is the London Boys reference about?

It's actually kind of tragic. They were a one-hit group in the 90's. Both of them died in a car accident in Austria.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:13 AM (GQ8sn)

53 I figured it was just the estrogen talking.

Posted by: WodeshedWodeshed at November 16, 2012 10:13 AM (W1ydo)

54 I heard that in the movie the one that looks like Jeter gets raped by a wolfman and then the one that looks like Todd Bridges dies of a broken heart.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at November 16, 2012 10:13 AM (+lsX1)

55 Did you see my wife's facebook rant that I posted in the last thread?

No. Link?

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:14 AM (GQ8sn)

56 9 You all are a bug of bleery homophobes and bigots.

It's enough to turn me non-libertarian. Posted by: K M at November 16, 2012 02:04 PM

But first you will blow me

Posted by: Mel Gibson at November 16, 2012 10:14 AM (wwsoB)

57 I was hoping you would at least find a different album cover.

Posted by: RKinRoanoke at November 16, 2012 10:14 AM (DOEXI)

38 Barky Years are like Moochelle Years.

Oppressive and painful to watch.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 10:14 AM (ICEh3)

59 again: see RED with Brian Cox it's just a quiet little film about revenge and justice it's ROADHOUSE meets HARRY BROWN

Posted by: soothie at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (AQXdX)

60 19 I never imagined Derek Jeter to be a catcher, but that picture says otherwise
---- Puleeze, that is obviously John Cusack

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (SO2Q8)

61 There's a London Boys Twilight movie? Awesome.

Posted by: George Orwell what knows we are now Airstrip One at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (Lxw+T)

62 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a malignant traitor.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (8y9MW)

63 BCochran, a clue-scythe to cut down the truly clueless tools your wife was ranting on.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (5CDzH)

64 >>secure rights to drilling in South Korea? (IIRC it was drilling)
Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 02:07 PM (piMMO)

Yeah, it was drilling.

"ladies" of her ilk have been seeking fees for drilling rights since right after Eve served up the first apple pie.

Posted by: ontherocks at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (aZ6ew)

65 Bet Ace is wearing his twillight t-shirt.

Posted by: YIKES! at November 16, 2012 10:15 AM (qwExy)

66 That was so obvious, it was almost painful.

Nevertheless, I give it 'E' for effort.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (8y9MW)

67 I saw the first Twigay with my wife. The entire movie is Kristen Stewart staring at the fag vampire with her horny expression. And a pathetic scene with vampires playing baseball. I burned my man card after I watched the movie and then buried it in my backyard while saluting and playing taps.

Posted by: Mr pink at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (1PF/K)

68 From the mouth of fat fuck Trumka: Â“WhatÂ’s happening with Hostess Brands is a microcosm of whatÂ’s wrong with America, as Bain-style Wall Street vultures make themselves rich by making America poor,Â” BAINNNNNNNNNN!!!!

Posted by: RWC at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (fWAjv)

69 No. Link?

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 02:14 PM (GQ8sn)

You want me to give the Horde access to my wife's facebook page?????

I posted the actual rant. Hang on and I'll get it....

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (da5Wo)

70 19 I never imagined Derek Jeter to be a catcher, but that picture says otherwise Posted by: The Q at November 16, 2012 02:06 PM (w4fEE) And I had no idea Mickey Rivers was a pitcher. I think that is Curtis Granderson - explains a lot about this season.

Posted by: RKinRoanoke at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (DOEXI)

71 Oh KM is talking out the flap-hole again.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (5CDzH)

72
I knew it was gonna a be a joke, but I thought it was gonna be a picture of the fiscal cliff. Is that by the Washington Monument?

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (3BbLJ)

73 whew....

Posted by: phoenixgirl at work at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (u673+)

74 55 Did you see my wife's facebook rant that I posted in the last thread?

No. Link?

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 02:14 PM (GQ8sn)

I found it.

I love your wife too.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (GQ8sn)

75 Vince Vaughn's new movie The Watch is teh funneh.

Posted by: Wodeshed at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (W1ydo)

76 Hostess is going under, Nutella is being taxed to death, jobless rates are going up, the Middle East is going up in smoke, and Twilight just came out, THE END IS NIGH

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at November 16, 2012 10:16 AM (NzBQO)

I never imagined Derek Jeter to be a catcher, but that picture says otherwise

Posted by: The Q

Thank you

Posted by: Lurking Canuck at November 16, 2012 10:17 AM (BrQrN)

78 You've been under a lot of stress and I could easily see you turning ghey, Ace. Ghey in a jimi ray style.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:17 AM (YaXd2)

79 After reading the 'Liz and Dick' review in the sidebar, it would appear that Ms. Lohan's looks are the only thing that make watching it worthwhile.

The reviewer tore apart every element of the film but couldn't help repeating himself how this-or-that can be overlooked as you "can't take your eyes off of" Lohan.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:17 AM (piMMO)

80 Do you think so little of me?
Posted by: Ace at 02:02 PM

Let's just say I was afraid to click "continue reading".

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at November 16, 2012 10:17 AM (Qxe/p)

59
again: see RED with Brian Cox

it's just a quiet little film about revenge and justice

I love that movie, 'RED'.

It's a 'Christmas movie' too...time to watch it again.

They're making a sequel. I hope they don't fuck it up.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 10:18 AM (ICEh3)

82 1) Buy up as many Twinkies, Ho-Hos, etc. as possible. 2) Head to Colorado for the weekend. 3) Profit!

Posted by: Captain Whitebread at November 16, 2012 10:18 AM (cVfX0)

83 I heard ace stayed through the credits.

Posted by: Tonic Dog at November 16, 2012 10:18 AM (X/+QT)

84 So here's the rant. And Anna, this was actually someone agreeing with her. Her friend put a post on my wife's page. A "can you believe these idiots" kinda thing. This was my wife's response:

[i] I know right! The problem is most people are so uninformed. Doesn't it
sound great that we'll all have healthcare!?! It'll be affordable! (
because the $20,000 we pay a year is super affordable.) Doesn't it sound
great to be on unemployment for 2 years
with no provisions to show you are even trying to find work!?! Welfare
FOREVER! Perfect! Now...here's the problem. Free stuff isn't ACTUALLY
free. All that stuff costs money. Someone else's money of course and OUR
money is infinite don't you know. Of course costs will go up!!! People
will lose their jobs ( as if our country needs more of that), people
will lose hours and not even qualify for their FREE healthcare because
they aren't full time anymore, and employers will be hesitant to hire
more employees because that may force them into the Obamacare bracket.
We know someone that owns several 's Chili's and Applebees chains going
up the coast. They cant afford Obamacare. It would bankrupt them. So
they are forced to either have lay offs, close certain restaurants
completely, or cut their hours in half and make them work at two
different restaurants and split the hours. That way they can have full
time hours but not qualify or benefits. It's ridiculous! It's stupid. He
doesn't understand business or basic economics and its going to crush
our country. All of it leads to rising costs all across the country for a
country that isn't working. Maybe we'll borrow a couple billion more
dollars from China! Makes me want to face palm everyone. The bottom line
is this: he's not a democrat. He's a socialist and socialism NEVER
works. Everyone ends up poor because there isn't enough money or workers
and the government can't provide. Government doesn't make money, it
spends it. If we want to make money, we need LESS government
involvement. We need people to get back to work. Unfortunately....not
going to happen anytime soon. At the end of his term, they'll be begging
us to clean up this mess.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:18 AM (da5Wo)

85 Nutella is being taxed to death

Damn if you had told me that before the election I may have been able to convince my sister to vote.

Posted by: Adam at November 16, 2012 10:18 AM (/YJYi)

86 You all are a bug of bleery homophobes and bigots.

I'm not a homophobe. I'm more of a homo-pffft.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 16, 2012 10:18 AM (QKKT0)

87 It's only been four years, that review claimed. Could that be true? Did Twilight coincide with the beginning of Obama's desolations? It seems like longer than that. The movie? Or the desolation?

Posted by: toby928© for TB at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (QupBk)

88 "Do you think so little of me?" Personally? I'd rather not say.

Posted by: wte9 at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (ZL7LA)

89 I came home from work and the wife was watching one of these. I calmly pick up my Glock 30 and put 8 .45 rounds through the tv, left the room and started up the grill.

Posted by: tangonine at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (x3YFz)

90 Why is that black guy crawling out of the white guy's ass?

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (YaXd2)

91 NDH, re: Lohan trying to portray Liz Taylor. I will just watch Liz's movies and save me the trouble of suffering through vapid acting that tries to recreate what is already on film. Talk about bottom of the barrel on creativity, wow Booray for Bollywood!

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (5CDzH)

92 Skyfall theme - Adele

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StJLvbPIvTw

Posted by: Mel Gibson at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (wwsoB)

93 I'd ask for a new rick roll, but I remember all too vividly the Helen Thomas Halloween pic in the sidebar for days.

Nope, better safe than sorry.

Posted by: GnuBreed at November 16, 2012 10:19 AM (ccXZP)

94 Israel closing Gaza roads near border. Preparation of the battlefield continues.

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:20 AM (1Y+hH)

95 You want me to give the Horde access to my wife's facebook page????? Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:16 PM (da5Wo) Where's the trust....the camaraderie... oh.. Yeah, good call.

Posted by: RWC at November 16, 2012 10:20 AM (fWAjv)

96 again: see RED with Brian Cox

it's just a quiet little film about revenge and justice

I love that movie, 'RED'.
It's a 'Christmas movie' too...time to watch it again.

They're making a sequel. I hope they don't fuck it up.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 02:18 PM (ICEh3)

I thought that was Brian Dennehy.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:20 AM (GQ8sn)

97 I fell for it. Good one.

Posted by: LASue at November 16, 2012 10:20 AM (gjIQF)

98 I saw Skyfall the other night. In the previews, just after the bit about Matt Damon's new anti-fracking mockumentary, was one for the new Red Dawn. So, we've got that.

Posted by: Wodeshed at November 16, 2012 10:20 AM (W1ydo)

99 I admit, I bought it hook, line, and sinker.

I was utterly shocked at the headline, and came in to the thread expecting to be flabbergasted at a fairly positive review of the Twilight series, and to then make some kind of post detailing why, exactly, the entire bloody thing was just wrong.

I am indeed a maroon. Well played, sir >.>

Posted by: Kinley Ardal at November 16, 2012 10:20 AM (XxBS0)

100 wheatthins, you might be confusing RED with RED with Bruce Willis. They're both titled Red and came out pretty much the same time.

Posted by: soothie at November 16, 2012 10:21 AM (A3dIE)

101 This is a spoof, right? Arnold Schwarzenegger is not even good enough to be an awful actor. Arnold is no kind of actor.

Everyone except for Jason Statham and Jean Claude Van Dam makes no effort to act.

Wait. You expected acting? Seriously? The whole point of the movie is for Ahnald to make Ahnaldisms, Sly to speak in a barely comprehensible voice, Dolf Lundgren to be big, and awesome to wish it were Chuck Norris.

Oh, and for sh!t to blow up.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at November 16, 2012 10:21 AM (8y9MW)

102 Damn! Tricked again! .. . o/t have you seen the skydiving cats (insurance company ad)? A hoot!

Posted by: and irresolute at November 16, 2012 10:22 AM (DBH1h)

103 wheatthins, you might be confusing RED with RED with Bruce Willis.

Wait ... I thought Red was a Brian Denehey movie.

Posted by: Meiczyslaw at November 16, 2012 10:22 AM (4+LTj)

104 Retired Extremely Dangerous was a deliciously violent movie.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:22 AM (5CDzH)

105 101 I really wish Israel would take a more balanced approach.

Posted by: President Bammer at November 16, 2012 02:21 PM (60GaT)

50% airstrikes, 50% artillery?

Posted by: tangonine at November 16, 2012 10:22 AM (x3YFz)

106 yep Brian Dennehy plays "Red" the dog

Posted by: soothie at November 16, 2012 10:22 AM (AQXdX)

107 I thought Daniel Craig was looking long in the tooth. They have two more Bond flixs to shoot. They better hurry.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:22 AM (YaXd2)

108 Expendables 2 - Why Jet Li bailed with a paycheck.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (5CDzH)

109 O/T, but if Victoria's Secret can't dress up a model in an Indian outfit, what does this mean for the Village People?

http://tinyurl.com/bt5nftt

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (QKKT0)

110 She claimed that she could make arrangements at the highest levels of government and then demanded an $80 MILLION fee. Which immediately signaled to the head of that company that she had no fucking clue what she was doing and he ended talks post haste.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 02:07 PM (piMMO)

Ummmm.....why did the head of the company think she had a clue to begin with?

Posted by: Tami at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (X6akg)

111 yep Brian Dennehy plays "Red" the dog *** Pretty sure that was Rula Lenska.

Posted by: Wodeshed at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (W1ydo)

112 My God ..... its full of stars!

Posted by: uterus cannon at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (3ZtZW)

113 We're all waiting for Ace's epic 6-volume review of Lincoln

because I'm off for 5 days over Thanksgiving and need something to read

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (8sCoq)

114 thanks ace

Posted by: just L at November 16, 2012 10:23 AM (0PiQ4)

115 That must have been one helluva video that Israel posted on youtube for the fake-astinians to get so pissy.

Posted by: RWC at November 16, 2012 10:24 AM (fWAjv)

116 #67 Mr pink: I burned my man card after I watched the movie and then buried it in my backyard while saluting and playing taps.

Very possibly the best movie review I've seen in ages!

Add a random 2500 word dissertation on the movie's place in society and it could have been Ace's.

Posted by: MrScribbler, banned at TepidAir at November 16, 2012 10:24 AM (yKUrR)

117 You want me to give the Horde access to my wife's facebook page????? Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:16 PM (da5Wo) Now, now, now, what's the worst that could happen? I mean to us. You're going to be wishing for the sweet merciful release of death, sure, but you really should take one for the team.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Coming not nearly soon enough. at November 16, 2012 10:24 AM (VtjlW)

118 What if they had tapped Brian Dennehy for Lincoln?

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:24 AM (8sCoq)

119 Next, Ace will be reviewing bicycle seats.

Posted by: disappointed at November 16, 2012 10:24 AM (vYB+W)

120 It's really cool that Skyfall is using the old Aston-Martin DB5

Posted by: kbdabear at November 16, 2012 10:24 AM (wwsoB)

121

96...I thought that was Brian Dennehy.

I've never understood the Brian Dennehy reference.

Sorry.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (ICEh3)

122 The movie? Or the desolation?

Yes.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (8y9MW)

123 I'll be disappointed if I hear any of you went to see Lincoln. Very, very, disappointed.

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (jUytm)

124 Now, now, now, what's the worst that could happen? I mean to us. You're going to be wishing for the sweet merciful release of death, sure, but you really should take one for the team.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Coming not nearly soon enough. at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (VtjlW)

Fuck. No.

That is all.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (da5Wo)

125 So the movie's entire title is "Twilight: Two Guys, Two Legs?"

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit. at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (lOmbq)

126 She claimed that she could make arrangements at the highest levels of government and then demanded an $80 MILLION
fee.

But first....

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (GQ8sn)

127 Did Arnold get to the choppah this time?

Posted by: Dr. Varno at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (DAtCf)

128 It's really cool that Skyfall is using the old Aston-Martin DB5

*****

HAHAHAHAA!

I just remembered the 'Skymall' take on Skyfall I saw yesterday.

I'm going to have to find the clip.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (piMMO)

129

There's a photo at DRUDGE of a Palestinian holding a bloddy baby. but the photo crops out the guy's head so I can't tell if that's Green Helmet Guy.

Remember him?

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:25 AM (1Y+hH)

130 The only reason to watch twilight is to see Ashley Greene, or Anna Kendrick's amazing rack, and I don't think her character is even in the movies anymore.

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (NzBQO)

131

Come on. I did not see "Twilight- Breaking Dawn Part 2" for God's sake.

Do you think so little of me?

A few long nights without any Val-U-Rite or hobo skinning, and a man can end up doing some mighty odd things, Ace. We worry about you.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (zF6Iw)

132 If there was an AoShq Bond film, I could see Ace easily playing the Judi Dench character

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (YaXd2)

133 > It's really cool that Skyfall is using the old Aston-Martin DB5

Posted by: kbdabear at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (wwsoB)

which was created on a 3d printer

http://tinyurl.com/c4psfeb

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (8sCoq)

134 The rifftrax of twilight is quite good. The actual movies are still terrible and borderline unwatchable, even with that.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (gznAu)

135 I've never understood the Brian Dennehy reference.
Sorry.

I think it may be a lesser-known internet meme that we picked up on here.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (GQ8sn)

136 120 Next, Ace will be reviewing bicycle seats.

Posted by: disappointed at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (vYB+W)

It ain't as great as you might think.

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell's bicycle seat at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (x3YFz)

137 111 Tami Her fake boobs hypnotized him

Posted by: just L at November 16, 2012 10:26 AM (0PiQ4)

138 wow Rula Lenska now there's a name I haven't heard in ages

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (jUytm)

139 I remember Green Helmet Guy from the days of actually reading a site with a tiny gangrenous fooseball logo.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (5CDzH)

140 I KNEW what was going to be under the cut link. I KNEW. And yet I clicked anyway, out of sick fascination. Because even if it wasn't the London Boys, I would pay good money to read ace's review of "Breaking Dawn Part 2." I suspect it would rival Rifftrax.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit[/i][/b][/u] at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (4df7R)

141 Ummmm.....why did the head of the company think she had a clue to begin with?

*****

the bullshit "consul" tag and title they gave her?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (piMMO)

142 Looks like the sugar high at the DOW is over....

Posted by: Pelosi at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (UZQM8)

143 London Boys. Brian Dennehey. We're just explaining all the inside jokes today aren't we? I consider that unfair. People should have to suffer through the ignorance until they can piece together just what in the hell the Horde is talking about. Like I had to.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (da5Wo)

144

What if they had tapped Brian Dennehy for Lincoln?

Sorry, he's already playing the part of the state of Illinois.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit. at November 16, 2012 10:27 AM (lOmbq)

145 I saw the first Twigay with my wife.
The entire movie is Kristen Stewart staring at the fag vampire with her horny expression.

She has more than one???

Posted by: Hollowpoint at November 16, 2012 10:28 AM (SY2Kh)

146 Next, Ace will be reviewing bicycle seats. Posted by: disappointed at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (vYB+W) It ain't as great as you might think. Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell's bicycle seat at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM (x3YFz) ----------------------------------------------------- You have NO idea....

Posted by: Helen Thomas' Bicycle Seat at November 16, 2012 10:28 AM (jucos)

147 >>>130 There's a photo at DRUDGE of a Palestinian holding a bloddy baby. but the photo crops out the guy's head so I can't tell if that's Green Helmet Guy. Remember him? Posted by: Meremortal I believe that is an injured Israeli child being evacuated. The guy has hebrew writing on his vest.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:28 AM (YaXd2)

148 It's really cool that Skyfall is using the old Aston-Martin DB5 Apparently they used 3D printing to mock up three extra ones to use so as not to destroy the real one. That's awesome as well. Fuck. No. That is all. Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:25 PM (da5Wo) Sheesh, it's like you take your vows seriously or something. Apropos of nothing, can someone help me lug these cans of kerosene over here? I might need them to throw on something.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Coming not nearly soon enough. at November 16, 2012 10:28 AM (VtjlW)

149
137 120
Next, Ace will be reviewing bicycle seats.

Posted by: disappointed at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (vYB+W)

It ain't as great as you might think.

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell's bicycle seat at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM (x3YFz)

Speak for yourself.

Posted by: Kate Upton's Bicycle Seat at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (da5Wo)

150 which was created on a 3d printer
http://tinyurl.com/c4psfeb Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM

Models used in special effects? Say it ain't so!

Posted by: kbdabear at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (wwsoB)

151

Oh hey - talking to idiot Obozo voters at work about the Hostess SnackQuake in progress and they were all like *mouths hanging open* and *gAsP!* and fretting about Teh Breadlines Right Around Teh Corner.

Which is hysterical. I work in a County Building. I sez to 'em: "Uh, what did you think 2 years of unemployment plus welfare after that IS? Its a breadline, ya dope. You see it every damned day."

They are now asking me about stuffing money under mattresses, buying gold, and what kinds of food to stock up on. LMAO

Posted by: uterus cannon at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (3ZtZW)

152 If there was an AoShq Bond film, I could see Ace easily playing the Judi Dench character

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM (YaXd2)

I want to know who'd be Q...

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit[/i][/b][/u] at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (4df7R)

153 Natasha Kinski? or whatever her name is Remember her? She got real famous real fast in the early '80's. Mainly because of a poster -- she posed nood with a snake. /all the men are nodding right now saying oh yeahhh I remember that

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (jUytm)

154

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:18 PM (da5Wo)

Congrats on the barrel avoidance there. Hopefully wifey didn't hyperventilate while writing that, it's a good un.

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (1Y+hH)

155 Uh oh Alexthechick is about to seriously burn something. Will it be posted to YouTube after the assist?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:29 AM (5CDzH)

156 Yes. Yes

this airfield will do nicely.

Here is your receipt.

Posted by: Wen Jibao at November 16, 2012 10:30 AM (EZl54)

157 I saw that one coming. There was no way you posted a big review of any Twilight movie.

Posted by: OSUsux at November 16, 2012 10:30 AM (DFXmi)

158 I want to know who'd be Q... Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit at November 16, 2012 02:29 PM (4df7R) EoJ

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:30 AM (3Y7RV)

159 She got real famous real fast in the early '80's. Mainly because of a poster -- she posed nood with a snake.

/all the men are nodding right now saying oh yeahhh I remember that

I can close my eyes and see that poster with perfect clarity.

She was a diamond-tipped elbow hawtie back then.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:30 AM (GQ8sn)

160 I believe that is an injured Israeli child being evacuated. The guy has hebrew writing on his vest.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 02:28 PM (YaXd2)

Whoa, thanks. Auto-response on my part.

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:30 AM (1Y+hH)

161 Tawny Kitane, White Snake, white Jaguar.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:31 AM (5CDzH)

162 >I think it may be a lesser-known internet meme that we picked up on here.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM (GQ8sn)

not to pull the curtain too far back but I'm pretty sure the dennehy meme started right here

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:31 AM (8sCoq)

163

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 02:27 PM (5CDzH)

Can the photoshopped smoke clouds be far behind?

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:31 AM (1Y+hH)

164 144 London Boys. Brian Dennehey. We're just explaining all the inside jokes today aren't we? I consider that unfair. People should have to suffer through the ignorance until they can piece together just what in the hell the Horde is talking about. Like I had to.
Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:27 PM

To break the tension, depression, and general feeling of shittiness;

Hey, ace, how about a thread sticking as many inside jokes and memes built up over the years?

Posted by: Abe Vigoda and Paul Anka at November 16, 2012 10:31 AM (wwsoB)

165

"You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!!!"

When a Freemason is in trouble, they're supposed to shout, "Will no one help the widow's son?" and all Masons in the area are obliged to rush to their rescue. Perhaps "You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!" could be the distress / identification call for Moron Nation.

Either that or "Where's Joe?" Both are good.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at November 16, 2012 10:31 AM (zF6Iw)

166

142 Ummmm.....why did the head of the company think she had a clue to begin with?

*****

the bullshit "consul" tag and title they gave her?

---------

So this Kelly woman had a "consul" title?

And she's visited the White House all those times?

Hmm...

Sounds like a 'bagman' role....or in her case, a 'bagwoman'.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 10:32 AM (ICEh3)

167 not to pull the curtain too far back but I'm pretty sure the dennehy meme started right here

Did it? I'm certain I saw it somewhere else too.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:32 AM (GQ8sn)

168 Next, Ace will be reviewing bicycle seats.

Posted by: disappointed at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (vYB+W)

Bicycle seat? Never use 'em.

Posted by: nosnhoJ selrahC at November 16, 2012 10:32 AM (v+QvA)

169 >/all the men are nodding right now saying oh yeahhh I remember that

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 02:29 PM (jUytm)

you're going to have to go back farther than that for me

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:32 AM (8sCoq)

170 Hmm...
Sounds like a 'bagman' role....or in her case, a 'bagwoman'.

Posted by: wheatie at November 16, 2012 02:32 PM (ICEh3)

A bag lady?

Posted by: Insomniac at November 16, 2012 10:32 AM (v+QvA)

171 157 Yes. Yes

this airfield will do nicely.

Here is your receipt.

Posted by: Wen Jibao at November 16, 2012 02:30 PM (EZl54)

Huh? What's an "azore?"

Posted by: US Foreign Policy at November 16, 2012 10:32 AM (x3YFz)

172 Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 02:31 PM (1Y+hH)

Thought those were a given. Perhaps now with more pixels.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (5CDzH)

173 also: get off my lawn you damn kids- trying to watch Matlock

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (8sCoq)

174 You would think Petraeus would have the decency of being brought down by a russian spy or a stripper -- not some Kim Kardashian wannabee.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (YaXd2)

175 "Do you think so little of me?"

In a word, yes. We've seen the posters in your room, Ace.

Posted by: Evil Otto at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (VPMjy)

176 I'll be disappointed if I hear any of you went to see Lincoln.

Very, very, disappointed. Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 02:25 PM

Saw the trailer for "Lincoln" on teh teevee. Whoever plays the role looks less realistic than the "Great Moments With Mr Lincoln" audio-animatronic at Mouse Land.

Besides, it's a Spielberg movie. I despise Spielberg.

Posted by: MrScribbler, banned at TepidAir at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (yKUrR)

177 O.K., now where's my damn pizza rolls?

Posted by: Harry Canyon at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (K24Ca)

178 I just got LondonBoy-rolled. And I liked it.

Posted by: jakeman at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (96M6e)

179 90 Why is that black guy crawling out of the white guy's ass? Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 02:19 PM (YaXd2) Because he is finished.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (3Y7RV)

180 Congrats on the barrel avoidance there. Hopefully wifey didn't hyperventilate while writing that, it's a good un.

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 02:29 PM (1Y+hH)

She's pretty riled up. I got the phone call this morning, "Yeah, I've been thinking about our convo last night...I think with the way this country is going to hell in a handbasket right now, the shotgun is a better choice than a second handgun. But plenty of ammo for both!"

Have I mentioned I love that woman?

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (da5Wo)

181 Know what kept me going during the first four years of TFG's Reign of Error?

The demented humor of this place

Posted by: kbdabear at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (wwsoB)

182 "I mean I consider it a real benefit and even blessing of the assignment of making a movie about Lincoln that I was able to look at the Obama years through a Lincoln lens, which I have found enormously useful. I think Obama is a great president and I feel that there is immense potential now for building - rebuilding a real progressive democracy in this country after a great deal of damage has been done to it." - Tony Kushner, screenwriter Lincoln. Heh heh.

Posted by: Jordan at November 16, 2012 10:33 AM (jRfn3)

183 EoJ

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 02:30 PM (3Y7RV)

Hmm... Perhaps. But I have a feeling EoJ wouldn't want to be cooped up in a lab all day making exploding pens. Not enough sex and violence; at least, not PURPOSEFUL sex and violence.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit[/i][/b][/u] at November 16, 2012 10:34 AM (4df7R)

184 uterus cannon thanks for the funny story. Ha on them

Posted by: just L at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (0PiQ4)

185 this was the poster on MY bedroom wall:

http://tinyurl.com/curk9fs

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (8sCoq)

186 Ummmm.....why did the head of the company think she had a clue to begin with?

****

I can't find the FNC story but, apparently, she really put on a show at the fella's NY offices with her "provocative dress and behavior" which aren't mentioned in piece below.

http://tinyurl.com/bumndoz

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (piMMO)

187 Hey, ace, how about a thread sticking as many inside jokes and memes built up over the years?

Posted by: Abe Vigoda and Paul Anka at November 16, 2012 02:31 PM (wwsoB)

Hell no. Rule #1 (expanded, living document) forbids that.

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (1Y+hH)

188 IF the AoS ever fielded a team of 00s I really do not think the world would survive.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (5CDzH)

189 140 I remember Green Helmet Guy from the days of actually reading a site with a tiny gangrenous fooseball logo. Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 02:27 PM (5CDzH) --Yes, 2006, with his sidekick the wailing burqa lady. It was not long after that I dropped out.

Posted by: logprof at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (jKE+Z)

190 >>>159 I want to know who'd be Q... Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit at November 16, 2012 02:29 PM (4df7R) EoJ Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Can he do ghey? The new Q is gayyish.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:35 AM (MazXE)

191 IF the AoS ever fielded a team of 00s I really do not think the world would survive.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 02:35 PM (5CDzH)

The SMOD Squad.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit[/i][/b][/u] at November 16, 2012 10:36 AM (4df7R)

192 153 If there was an AoShq Bond film, I could see Ace easily playing the Judi Dench character
Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM (YaXd2)

I want to know who'd be Q... Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit at November 16, 2012 02:29 PM

How about ME?

Posted by: Jeff Goldblum at November 16, 2012 10:36 AM (wwsoB)

193 How about ME?

Posted by: Jeff Goldblum at November 16, 2012 02:36 PM (wwsoB)

Shut up, you're dead.

Posted by: Insomniac at November 16, 2012 10:36 AM (DrWcr)

194 The SMOD Squad.

MWR for the win!

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (5CDzH)

195 How about ME?

Posted by: Jeff Goldblum at November 16, 2012 02:36 PM (wwsoB)

Never heard of you.

Posted by: Charles Gibson at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (4df7R)

196 Presumably in the new Red Dawn the communists arrive not by parachute but rather via the Hawaii/Indonesia corridor.

Posted by: Wodeshed at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (W1ydo)

197 Have I mentioned I love that woman?

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:33 PM (da5Wo)

With respect I love her too. Platonically of course. She sounds like what I call a foxhole girl.

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (1Y+hH)

198

Shut up, you're dead.

Outstanding! Can I have his hash?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit. at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (lOmbq)

199 Come on Ace, you so totally saw the vampire pr0n called Breaking Dawn.

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie ® at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (1hM1d)

200 I had a picture of Dorothy Stratten in my room. Then her druggie abusive boyfriend killed her.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (3Y7RV)

201 Shut up Jeff Goldblum, Brundel Fly got you.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:37 AM (5CDzH)

202 the radio ad for Lincoln has the president uttering the words "equality," "fairness," and "justice" all in one breath yeah, it's obvious that an Obama moonbat wrote the script

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 10:38 AM (jUytm)

203 So this Kelly woman had a "consul" title?
And she's visited the White House all those times?

Hmm...
Sounds like a 'bagman' role....or in her case, a 'bagwoman'.

****

There was a former intelligence office on FNC the other night, I can't remember his name, but he said that this entire affair raises his brow because if he were to seek to suborn a politician or high level military official, Kelly would be precisely the type of agent he would recruit.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:38 AM (piMMO)

204 And for the record, Jill St John was the best Bond Girl

we may have covered this earlier but I feel it bears repeating

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 10:38 AM (8sCoq)

205 I was worried. With the election and the master of your domain thing, I was thinking in a pit of despair you had taken up the TwiHard religion of wimpy vampires.

Posted by: Angrybell at November 16, 2012 10:38 AM (cQ6oO)

206 the reviews for Lincoln are already written awating to be published Lincoln is about today's homosexuals.

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 10:39 AM (jUytm)

207

Next, Ace will be reviewing bicycle seats.

Posted by: disappointed at November 16, 2012 02:24 PM (vYB+W)

It ain't as great as you might think.

Posted by: Rosie O'Donnell's bicycle seat at November 16, 2012 02:26 PM (x3YFz)
-----------------------------------------------------

You have NO idea....

Posted by: Helen Thomas' Bicycle Seat at November 16, 2012 02:28 PM (jucos)

Oh, I used to dream of being Helen Thomas' bicycle seat. . .

Posted by: Michelle Obama's Bicycle Seat at November 16, 2012 10:39 AM (zF6Iw)

208 185 You think that's funny? Next secretary that starts asking me, Imma tell her how to make Squirrel Gravy and Taters

Posted by: uterus cannon at November 16, 2012 10:39 AM (3ZtZW)

209 If we're casting the Horde as Bond people, I get to be the bad Bond Girl. Or, you know, Blofeld. One of those.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Coming not nearly soon enough. at November 16, 2012 10:40 AM (VtjlW)

210 this was the poster on MY bedroom wall:

Posted by: Jones in CO >>

I was gonna guess this one.

http://tinyurl.com/bs6ovre

Posted by: Buzzsaw at November 16, 2012 10:41 AM (tf9Ne)

211 I was admiring the new house Kristin bought: http://goo.gl/NtZ0y The weirdos in the comments were knocking it but I think it looks great. Not too big, not too small, and doesn't look like a fucking hotel.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 10:41 AM (MazXE)

212 And for the record, Jill St John was the best Bond Girl

Xenia Onnatopp, played by Famke Jannsen.

I say that because I had a girlfriend who was her identical twin.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:41 AM (GQ8sn)

213 this was the poster on MY bedroom wall: Posted by: Jones in CO >> Lee Majors? You make us guess, we're gonna guess.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:42 AM (3Y7RV)

214

How is today not over yet? The hands on the clock refuse to move!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit[/i][/b][/u] at November 16, 2012 10:42 AM (4df7R)

215

There was a former intelligence office on FNC the other night, I can't remember his name, but he said that this entire affair raises his brow because if he were to seek to suborn a politician or high level military official, Kelly would be precisely the type of agent he would recruit.

I'm honestly surprised that Jill Kelley wasn't a madam. Seriously. I expected to find out that she had a stable of girls that she rented out to VIPs visiting CENTCOM and Tampa, and that it was why she had the access that she did.

Posted by: Alex at November 16, 2012 10:42 AM (3x3F6)

216
210 If we're casting the Horde as Bond people, I get to be the bad Bond Girl.

Or, you know, Blofeld. One of those.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Coming not nearly soon enough. at November 16, 2012 02:40 PM (VtjlW)

Hell yes. Of course, you know, xxx parodies of movies and tv shows are all the rage now. So I'm told.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:42 AM (da5Wo)

217 OT My KDS 19in flat panel monitor has died. Emitted the last of its magic smoke apparently. So looking for a replacement.

Staples has an AOC 24in widescreen LED LCD monitor for $139.99. Tempting me.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:43 AM (5CDzH)

218 Presumably in the new Red Dawn the communists arrive not by parachute but rather via the Hawaii/Indonesia corridor.

Ummm...the trailer shows the cargo planes dropping them in. One gets shot down and hits the house next to the two main characters.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:43 AM (GQ8sn)

219

all the men are nodding right now saying oh yeahhh I remember that

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 02:29 PM (jUytm)

you're going to have to go back farther than that for me

Posted by: Jones in CO at November 16, 2012 02:32 PM (8sCoq)

Didn't know Alice Roosevelt Longworth ever did a poster. You learn something new every day.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at November 16, 2012 10:43 AM (zF6Iw)

220 And for the record, Jill St John was the best Bond Girl

Xenia Onnatopp, played by Famke Jannsen.

I say that because I had a girlfriend who was her identical twin.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 02:41 PM (GQ8sn)

Liz Clayman was your girlfriend?

Posted by: Meremortal, Let It Burn To The Ground at November 16, 2012 10:44 AM (1Y+hH)

221 DaR (Daughters of the Revolution) did some posters.

Posted by: soothsayer at November 16, 2012 10:44 AM (jUytm)

222 Oh, I used to dream of being Helen Thomas' bicycle seat. . .

Posted by: Michelle Obama's Bicycle Seat at November 16, 2012 02:39 PM (zF6Iw)

Would've been a palace to us.

Posted by: Michael Moore's custom made double-wide bicycle seat at November 16, 2012 10:44 AM (4df7R)

223 'twas a joke, EC.

Posted by: Wodeshed at November 16, 2012 10:45 AM (W1ydo)

224 The poster in my room as a kid.

http://tinyurl.com/ch5azlq

What? It was the 90's.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:45 AM (da5Wo)

225 Sounds like all the writers here on Ace should contribute to creating the ultimate AoS Lifestyle super spy movie. With 1000x Kung-Fu grip action!

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:45 AM (5CDzH)

226 Here's the new Skyfall trailer

http://tinyurl.com/bm67z85

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:45 AM (piMMO)

227 I really wish Israel would take a more balanced approach.

Riyadh, Teheran, Islamabad

3 points defines a plane.

Posted by: DaveA at November 16, 2012 10:46 AM (MOWP1)

228 Gotta fetch the youngens, later rons.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:46 AM (3Y7RV)

229

If we're casting the Horde as Bond people, I get to be the bad Bond Girl.

Xenia Onatopp, AtC. You were born to play that role.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at November 16, 2012 10:46 AM (zF6Iw)

230 Ace to AtC, "No more foreplay."

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:46 AM (5CDzH)

231 What? It was the 90's. Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 02:45 PM (da5Wo) David Hasselhof?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:47 AM (3Y7RV)

232 No love for Denise Richards' and her BRILLIANT nuclear scientist in the "Best Bond Girl" voting? *innocent face*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit[/i][/b][/u] at November 16, 2012 10:47 AM (4df7R)

233
Xenia Onnatopp, played by Famke Jannsen.

I say that because I had a girlfriend who was her identical twin.

****

Even as a woman, I feel totally secure in my heterosexuality in saying that Famke Jansen is not only gorgeous, but incredibly sexy.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:47 AM (piMMO)

234 231 Ace to AtC, "No more foreplay." Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 02:46 PM (5CDzH) Doin his laundry doesn't count as foreplay.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Wonders what Dagny thinks at November 16, 2012 10:48 AM (3Y7RV)

235
233 No love for Denise Richards' and her BRILLIANT nuclear scientist in the "Best Bond Girl" voting? *innocent face*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit at November 16, 2012 02:47 PM (4df7R)

I'm a big fan of Denise Richard's...acting abilities.....

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:48 AM (da5Wo)

236 Liz Clayman was your girlfriend?

Heh...no.

My girl looked exactly like Famke when Goldeneye came out. If she styled her hair just right, I could not tell who was who. And yes, the sex was as crazy as she was.

Lasted about two months.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:49 AM (GQ8sn)

237 WH petition for Twinkie bailout. Knew that was coming. Cuz this liberal will be all about socia. . . I mean taking over companies. Names Michelle and Bloomberg coCEOs. Twinkies will be green stuffed with arugula. There ya go, 5 million green jobs

Posted by: just L at November 16, 2012 10:49 AM (0PiQ4)

238 TLDR.

Posted by: Butters at November 16, 2012 10:50 AM (NIZHJ)

239 230 If we're casting the Horde as Bond people, I get to be the bad Bond Girl.

Xenia Onatopp, AtC. You were born to play that role.

I wonder if Alex has a thighmaster?

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:50 AM (GQ8sn)

240 I wonder if Alex has a thighmaster?

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 02:50 PM (GQ8sn)

I'm sure she has quite the list of volunteers.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at November 16, 2012 10:51 AM (da5Wo)

241 Sounds like all the writers here on Ace should contribute to creating the ultimate AoS Lifestyle super spy movie. With 1000x Kung-Fu grip action!

I call the crossbow scene.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at November 16, 2012 10:52 AM (SY2Kh)

242 Oh dear Lord.

My daughter just texted me from work, something she rarely does, and from the get-go I could tell it would be a doozy.

She said she just been involved in a heated debate about the election with someone who voted for Obama because he is black. Well, I suppose my daughter must have pointed out that he is also white because she was met with this argument:

Your DNA is determined by your father so Obama is fully black

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at November 16, 2012 10:52 AM (piMMO)

243 NDH, words fail when encountering such staggering bigotry who seems to be advocating a reverse 1/32d drop rule.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:54 AM (5CDzH)

244 Your DNA is determined by your father so Obama is fully black

NOT SURE IF SERIOUS.

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 10:55 AM (GQ8sn)

245 Your DNA is determined by your father so Obama is fully black>>

DNA = Democrat Number Assignment?

Posted by: Buzzsaw at November 16, 2012 10:56 AM (tf9Ne)

246 DNA = Denying Narcissistic Arse aka Obama.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at November 16, 2012 10:57 AM (5CDzH)

247 Wow. That never gets old, Comrade.

Posted by: Comrade Trainer at November 16, 2012 10:59 AM (QbdUW)

248 I was seriously worried for a moment!

Posted by: Steve at November 16, 2012 11:00 AM (fCHpM)

249 Jill St. John was great... but so was Lana Wood...

Diamonds was campy for a Connery, but those were a pair...

Posted by: phreshone at November 16, 2012 11:00 AM (MAhUT)

250 Jill St. John was great... but so was Lana Wood...

Diamonds was campy for a Connery, but those were a pair...

Plenty O'Toole.

"Yes you are!"

Posted by: EC at November 16, 2012 11:02 AM (GQ8sn)

251 Jill St. John was great... but so was Lana Wood...

Diamonds was campy for a Connery, but those were a pair...

Posted by: phreshone at November 16, 2012 03:00 PM (MAhUT)

Jane Seymour was my fantasy bunkmate. Though Honor Blackman was nothign to sneeze at, either.

OK, sick of work, so am going drinking. Have a great weekend, all.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at November 16, 2012 11:04 AM (zF6Iw)

252 You know, I really really want to hear these guys' songs now.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at November 16, 2012 11:08 AM (IOSGZ)

253 Honor Blackman was still performing in her 70s and she looked damn good.

Posted by: Walkers! at November 16, 2012 11:12 AM (MazXE)

254 So, part 2 was about butt vampires? Where's the glitter skin?

Posted by: HeftyJo at November 16, 2012 11:19 AM (EN3UW)

255 I didn't know Gutfeld sang

Posted by: Schwalbe: The Me-262© at November 16, 2012 11:25 AM (UU0OF)

256 This time I *knew* London Boys would pop up.

Posted by: logprof at November 16, 2012 02:03 PM (jKE+Z)

Me too. I was hoping for a "but mostly" joke instead, but this'll do for now.

Did I ever mention how much this still tickles my funny bone every time I think of it? ----> http://minx.cc/?post=294343

Posted by: no one of consequence at November 16, 2012 11:47 AM (whMsz)

257 Heh heh.

Heh heh.

Posted by: $16 trillion of debt, and compound interest at November 16, 2012 11:51 AM (hZ+2N)

258 I'm so relieved this was a joke. I thought he's lost his mind...There's been so much bad news. I wondered if you were escaping it through any movie available.

Posted by: Melissa at November 16, 2012 12:06 PM (1bFvg)

259 So I was roped into going to the 1st Twilight movie with a bunch of my girlfriends (all of us ages late 30s to 40ish). I laughed my ass off the whole movie. Found out it was not a comedy. oops. Was not invited to view movies with this group of friends again.

Posted by: Beckster at November 16, 2012 12:59 PM (JhwZo)

260 I was just thinking there had better be a London Boys album cover under the fold.

Posted by: Deathknyte at November 16, 2012 04:34 PM (Dw/mg)

261 Stick to the movie reviews, you silly right-wing hater. You certainly know more about that than how to predict an election. You all laughed and laughed when I told you that I and everyone I knew supported our beloved President, Barack Obama, completely. And now here you are. Four more years of begging for scraps from His table. Progress will be made. America will be moved Forward. This hate-filled racist nation will be humbled before the world community. And all of you will pay dearly for your crimes.

Posted by: Mary Cloggenstein from Brattleboro, VT at November 16, 2012 07:08 PM (s1XiY)

262 I'm actually shocked by this post. I feel misled. :-(

Posted by: RJ at November 16, 2012 07:57 PM (5f8oG)

263 Is Mary Cloggenstein a real left-wing troll, or a right-winger pretending to be a left-wing troll? I seriously cannot tell.

Posted by: RJ at November 16, 2012 07:59 PM (5f8oG)

264

You know, I opened up this thread because I was so shocked by the headline. I was thinking "WTF??? He actually paid money to go see that thing?"

And then I opened it up, dropped my head and realized...that son of bitch did it to me again.

Posted by: Bets at November 18, 2012 03:03 AM (Atv/f)

Hide Comments | Add Comment | Refresh | Top

Comments are disabled. Post is locked.

208kb generated in CPU 0.2264, elapsed 0.4706 seconds.
64 queries taking 0.3868 seconds, 392 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.