The TSA detention is unconstitutional.

ARTICLE I Section. 6.

Clause 1: The Senators and Representatives shall receive a Compensation for their Services, to be ascertained by Law, and paid out of the Treasury of the United States. They shall in all Cases, except Treason, Felony and Breach of the Peace, beprivileged from Arrest during their Attendance at the Session of their respective Houses, and in going to and returning from the same; and for any Speech or Debate in either House, they shall not be questioned in any other Place.

Posted by: Juicer at January 23, 2012 01:01 PM (84c8s)\

hey, don't forget us.

Posted by: eman at January 23, 2012 01:01 PM (3VSsp)

Iowa is doing away with traffic cams (they really aren't prevalent anyway) because the (GOP) governor was caught speeding in AZ with one.

He didn't whine or bitch about it, but all of a sudden he realized what a problem they were.

Look, if you guys can't see the threat posed by Senators' anomalies and geriatric colostomy bags, I can't help you.

Al Qaeda stooges.

Rand Paul has a Prince Albert piercing. 

I saw it in the Congressional showers, once. 

We were having our weekly tickle fight, Reps v. Sens, and Rand's towel slipped.

I don't see the average TSA security professional being big on politics,

The average TSA worker doesn't even speak English. 

Meanwhile Obama keeps rising in the polls because we are going to teach the GOP and the MSM a lesson.

He didn't whine or bitch about it, but all of a sudden he realized what a problem they were.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 23, 2012 01:04 PM (T0NGe)

And there is the problem with having a governing class that is separated from everyone else. If we had elected officials that served a few terms and then went back to the real world we'd never see things like traffic cams.

Seriously-most of us are addicted to politics-but could we pick out Rand Paul at random?

If he presents a photo ID with "Rand Paul" on it, yeah I would probably pick up on that.

Rand Paul has a Prince Albert piercing. 

I saw it in the Congressional showers, once. 

We were having our weekly tickle fight, Reps v. Sens, and Rand's towel slipped.

.... wait..... wut???

Posted by: tasker at January 23, 2012 01:11 PM (r2PLg)

You don't think after ten minutes, realizing he could miss his plane, that he didn't say "I'm your senator, rand paul and I'm on my way to DC and I need to catch my plane so can we move this along?"

To me, this is a no brainer. Day 1 promise. Obama may dodge the issue by throwing his hands up and pointing to procedure, but he is the boss of the TSA and he approves those procedures.

It's a very popular issue.

Has any republican candidate taken a stand of getting rid of the porno-scanners and the prison searches?

Didn't a gun just make it throught the TSA "checkpoint"?

This is why conservatives BEGGED Bush not to create the TSA and another federal beaurocracy.  Now, we're stuck with these slugs. We'll have to employ them and pay them for life and they can abuse any American they want ... except for muslims -the TSA aren't allowed to touch them.

I'm pretty sure your average frontline TSAer doesn't know who Rand Paul is.

That was my first thought as well. 

Has anything ever been done about that whole, gee, Timmy, sorry the scanner gave you cancer thing?  I mean, the EPA made Hershey put new scrubbers on the plant thus eliminating the smell of chocolate in the air in freaking Hershey, PA but it's a-okay to let the TSA goons work about radiation with no training or protective gear, right?

I would like to see The Sexoffender Agency abolished entirely, and DHS too - security through bureaucracy is insane.

But man, I would take it if I could just get them to perform par for the government course and stand around getting paid to do nothing, sans porno scanners and prison searches.

I like the idea of a Senator being taken and given the rubber glove treatment. Maybe it will light a fire under them to change this idiotic system.

Odd then, they did it to the only senator who was already on fire.

Half of all people are below average.

Yeah, I know... "Racist!!"

Posted by: tasker at January 23, 2012 01:03 PM (r2PLg)

Undoubtedly he had his father's campaign paraphenalia prominent.  A button or sticker on his carry-on.

And, frankly, the TSA might know exactly who Rand Paul is.  I'm sure he's one of their betes noires.

Bush, was dumb enough to sign off on it.

This.  Because we could see this idiocy and gigantic pork trough that is DHS coming several light years away.  Gotta have biochem response capbility in Boise, you know.

Who else gets the Vogon guard scene from Hitchhiker's Guide stuck in their head when discussing TSA?

That Catholic Guy on fox is going off on obama. Sorry I forgot his name.

Lino Rulli?

Really?

Meteorologist Watch ... tips@forecastthefacts.org

Posted by: Willy at January 23, 2012 01:18 PM (ooyyD)

They were both the rotted musings of that pathetic joke, the 9/11 commission.  Pretty much everything that commission recommended was ridiculous and stupid .. and they didn't find jack sh#t about any deeper parts of 9/11.

once the commission made the recommendation it was tough for anyone to fight against it, but I blame Bush and Co for ever allowing that ridiculous POS commission to be put together, in the first place.  That was INSANE.  How they managed to get the author of many of the early anti-spy regulations and rules on the committee investigating why our spy agencies were so hamstrung and out of the loop is an utter mystery ...

Posted by: nevergiveup at January 23, 2012 01:22 PM (i6RpT)

The modified poodle haircut is a dead giveaway

Mine was when they swabbed my pork chops.

I'll take things that seem reall, really dirty especially when written at AOSHQ for $1,600, Alex.

Mine was when they swabbed my pork chops.
Posted by: HeatherRadish

Isn't that classified as sexual assault?

Oh, you mean ACTUAL pork chops.

Never mind.

TWICE I've been taken aside by the TSA for spot check pat downs as my plane is boarding.  Twice!   And this for a person who can count the number of times she's taken a plane on both hands and still have fingers left over.

I am white as a sheet with red curly hair and the athletic physique of a paunchy sloth.  The threat I pose?  Exactly zero.  But boy I tell ya, there is nothing so fun as having the contents of your purse turfed out on the floor and picked through by TSA agents like chimps combing each other for bugs while your fellow passengers march past you on their way to board the plane, eyeing you with intense suspicion because, "What did SHE do wrong?"

We all realize that if the TSA doesn't get axed somehow, or scaled back, in a few years they are going to expand into railway and subway stations right?

I mean they've been talking about that all along, once they feel like they have a handle on this airport stuff, they're going to expand to railways and subways and other forms of public transport. Because what's the point of just doing 1? It's the Transportation Security Administration.

So we are going to have to submit to undignified abuse if you want to use the subway or take a train, either.

And I don't expect gas prices (or CAFE standards) to come down.

Secede.  I think about 20 Texas Rangers could organize airport security for the whole Republic. 

Posted by: Ian S. at January 23, 2012 01:22 PM (tqwMN)

TSA are union.  You don't think that union guys are constantly told who the "stupid" Senators are who want to take away the unionsters' "hard won" benefits?

Wait, what?  I visited Hershey not that long ago and I was disappointed that the whole town didn't smell like chocolate.  I should've known the EPA was to blame.

I'm fuzzy on the details and way way too, um, attempting to conserve energy to look it up, but the gist is that new environmental regs came in that resulted in the elimination of the delicious, delicious chocolate smell.  Hershey attempted to get a waiver on the grounds that a. the old scrubbers still met the new requirements and the chocolate smell wasn't precisely pollution and b.  it was FREAKING HERSHEY and that's part of the whole tourist thing.  EPA said sorry, no.

Did you know that Hershey has moved a whole bunch of plants in the US and Canada to Mexico?  I'm sure that's just correlation and not causation.  Hell, I think the Hershey plant in Hershey is closed now.

So we are going to have to submit to undignified abuse if you want to use the subway or take a train, either.

Posted by: Entropy, Racism Delenda Est

If that happens, I think the morons might also what to consider bringing their own KY along on trips from now on too.  You know, just for convenience.

Just make sure it's in a contained that is 3 oz or smaller.

That is the heading for a very long list.

Nice man and patriotic American but like his dad, a big government republican that together with Clinton completely undid any good to come out of The Reagan Revolution, aside from the spirit that lives on with most of us here.

Posted by: Juan Williams at January 23, 2012 01:04 PM (DfsRf)

Could you have typed Juan's name in more of a racist fashion?

Posted by: joncelli, too stressed by half at January 23, 2012 01:28 PM (RD7QR)

I think the TSA should fine airlines that charge for the first bag.  You should have been able to check your CPAP machine and, frankly, if we were able to check our carryons, TSA would have less to do.

I am white as a sheet with red curly hair and the athletic physique of a paunchy sloth.  The threat I pose?  Exactly zero.

It's the boots.  And the soullessness.  But mainly the boots. 

I have to say though, a ticked off ginger is pretty damn high on the threat meter.

The least safe (watching people skirt the machines, and hiring security people sympathetic with the asswipes who hijacked planes) is Detroit Metro.

I used to fly thru Detroit Metro six times a year because, obviously, the fastest way to fly from NEPA to NC was through Detroit.  Every freaking time I was stuck there for a layover I got divebombed by the stupid birds that live in the terminal.  Every.  Freaking.  Time. 

Could you have typed Juan's name in more of a racist fashion?

Juan "Food Stamp" Williams

Could you have typed Juan's name in more of a racist fashion?

Posted by: Chris Matthews' Va jay jay

You mean something like LAJuan or Wuan, or maybe LaJuanIsha?

Like that?

I have to say though, a ticked off ginger is pretty damn high on the threat meter.

Posted by: alexthechick

It's also pretty hawt.

the bottoms of my bare feet examined with a flashlight

Go on.

the bottoms of my bare feet examined with a flashlight

Hello.

It's the boots.  And the soullessness.  But mainly the boots. 

I have to say though, a ticked off ginger is pretty damn high on the threat meter.

This is true.  I always forget to take the 'aggravated ginger' quotient into account when analyzing my threat potential.  Of course, you'd assume that the TSA goons would realize that dragging me out of line so they can dig through my personal items in search of some phantom pair of nail scissors is going to make me a VERY aggravated ginger, instead of the mildly irritated ginger I was before.

I have to get myself some stompy boots.  Then at least I'd have a little added menace to go along with the Dead-Eyed Stare of Soulless Loathing.  At least then I could pretend that they're actually making an effort.

Posted by: alexthechick Team Meteor - sprinkle cupcakes, cookies, cheesecake, ELE what's not to love at January 23, 2012 01:29 PM (VtjlW)

No, but it was close to being shut down.

Blame the union.

Posted by: alexthechick Team Meteor - sprinkle cupcakes, cookies, cheesecake, ELE what's not to love at January 23, 2012 01:33 PM (VtjlW)

Okay, I've been through Detroit Metro twice and never saw any birds.  Where the heck are they so that the next time I (inevitably) get dragged through that awful place I can be sure to avoid them?

I think the TSA should fine airlines that charge for the first bag.  You should have been able to check your CPAP machine and, frankly, if we were able to check our carryons, TSA would have less to do.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 23, 2012 01:33 PM (T0NGe)

No way in hell would I check that machine. Number one, it's too delicate to handle the kind of abuse the baggage abusers put it through; number two, if I lost it my wife would divorce me. The CPAP thingie rides with me.

Okay, I've been through Detroit Metro twice and never saw any birds.  Where the heck are they so that the next time I (inevitably) get dragged through that awful place I can be sure to avoid them?

Just look for the massive avian cloud above Alex.

Posted by: franksalterego at January 23, 2012 01:30 PM (9XykO)

It's a bitch driving to the Carribean, though, isn't it? 

You mean something like LAJuan or Wuan, or maybe LaJuanIsha?

Like that?

Posted by: Sean Bannion at January 23, 2012 01:34 PM (sbV1u)

TaJuana

I'm black as the ....um Ace of Spades, and, you guessed it, I never get the pat down.  But we'll see what happens next month.

My step-dad says that he'd profile anyone with a funny name.  Now, all of his daughters have, shall we say, interesting names.  He said that he'd profile us first if he didn't know us.  But he's one of those evil black conservatives.

I call PROFILING!!!!!!!

He perfectly fits the "suspect" in those TSA training videos.

TaJuana

I'm black as the ....um Ace of Spades, and, you guessed it, I never get the pat down.  But we'll see what happens next month.

My step-dad says that he'd profile anyone with a funny name.  Now, all of his daughters have, shall we say, interesting names.  He said that he'd profile us first if he didn't know us.  But he's one of those evil black conservatives.

 Barack Husein Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable tyrant.

I not denounce myself.

Posted by: tasker at January 23, 2012 01:40 PM (r2PLg)

I could do that.  Of course, I'd whack my head on the airplane's doorframe (moreso than usual), but it might be worth it to see the terror in those puny TSA agents' eyes as I proceeded to Loom.

I am VERY good at Looming. 

He said that he'd profile us first if he didn't know us.  But he's one of those evil black conservatives.
Posted by: baldilocks

Personally, I'd rather that TSA just profile the guys looking shifty, speaking Arabic and praying toward Mecca before they get on the flight. 

I guess that's too much to ask.

Just look for the massive avian cloud above Alex.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at January 23, 2012 01:40 PM (B+qrE)

*SNORT!*

Okay, I just hrawked Blackberry-Pomegranate POM all over my computer.  G-ddammit, I have to stop consuming beverages when reading the HQ!

G-ddammit, I have to stop consuming beverages when reading the HQ!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit

Hang in there, it takes a while to discipline yourself that way.

I ruined yet another keyboard last week.  The IT guys are starting to wonder what's up.

Hang in there, it takes a while to discipline yourself that way.

I ruined yet another keyboard last week.  The IT guys are starting to wonder what's up.

Posted by: Sean Bannion at January 23, 2012 01:46 PM (sbV1u)

I'm going to have to start blaming it on undiagnosed Tourette's. 

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 23, 2012 01:03 PM (UOM4

Welcome back, Jane.  The Horde missed you.  However, we understood that you needed to take a break from The Troll Who's Name Shall Not be Spoken.

Sit down, loser.

you rang?

Posted by: Honey Badger of the Sith at January 23, 2012 01:44 PM (GvYeG)

Has any republican candidate taken a stand of getting rid of the porno-scanners and the prison searches?

Posted by: Entropy, Racism Delenda Est at January 23, 2012 01:14 PM (mf67L)

No, they have much bigger fish to fry- other republicans.

Posted by: mpfs, back in my cubicle from hell at January 23, 2012 01:49 PM (iYbLN)

Tipping over because of the presence of too many American servicemen and women...

Yup.  They are called islands. 

Posted by: mpfs, back in my cubicle from hell

Are you as red as a lobster?  Or were you....prudent?

Posted by: mpfs, back in my cubicle from hell at January 23, 2012 01:43 PM (iYbLN)

Ha!  "TaJuana" is actually similar to the given name of one of my sisters.  I told my parents that I was glad that I was born before that fade was on the ascent.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Camellia Sinensis Operative at January 23, 2012 01:49 PM (0q2P7)

The thing is, no part of the machine was ever in contact with anything other than me and my furniture. And if I've started exuding nitro while I sleep I'd really like to know about it.

good to see you back Jane.

i have two screws holding my ankle togeather and they set off any scanner that i go through.

Yup.  They are called islands. 

Posted by: mpfs, back in my cubicle from hell

Are you as red as a lobster?  Or were you....prudent?

Posted by: Waterhouse at January 23, 2012 01:49 PM (hNdbt)

Each time I've flown into Detroit, I've ended up having to book it from one end of the airport to the other to reach my connecting flight.  It is a surreal experience from start to finish.

The thing is, no part of the machine was ever in contact with anything other than me and my furniture. And if I've started exuding nitro while I sleep I'd really like to know about it.

Ace is now at the stage of grief where he's funny again.  We call that stage 'desperate horror.'

Keep laughing into the abyss, fella.

Posted by: Dave at January 23, 2012 01:55 PM (Xm1aB)

Four days? What do you drive- a Volt?

I don't see what the problem is here.

Did Rand Paul go on to blow up an airplane? No? SUCCESS!

Posted by: franksalterego at January 23, 2012 01:57 PM (9XykO)

Pride has it's price, I guess. 

Posted by: alexthechick Team Meteor - sprinkle cupcakes, cookies, cheesecake, ELE what's not to love at January 23, 2012 01:29 PM (VtjlW)

As long as the highway there isn't I'm good.

You know who else throws the word "retarded" around as easily as you, Ace? Paul kooks, that's who.

You certainly seem angry today, so maybe this isn't the place for me to be, because I happen to think the word "retarded" in all its forms, is significantly more offensive than any number of words that will get you banned around here.  Unlike the precious protected classes, the mentally retarded are not in a position to defend themselves against such careless slurs. 

  I was at the airport in San Francisco going through the scanners etc. to fly back to the midwest after a trip touring a bunch of winerys.  This was in '03.  A guy about three people behind me was dressed in studded assless chaps over jeans and a studded leather vest sans shirt.  He was flaming- not that theres anything wrong with that... the TSA people did pat downs, hand held scan thingys etc. etc. and so forth- all the while the guy in studded leather was being loud and outraged at the TSA workers and making a huge sceen.

 I thought to myself at the time that there are dumb people in this world and then there are fuckin' idiots.

  Now, I kind of think it would be funny to wear that same outfit on my next trip (if I had the time and inclination to possibly be arrested) just to fuck with the TSA.   

Posted by: digitalbrownshirt at January 23, 2012 04:56 PM (uUtvO)

I think they have a hire the handicapped policy, like all govt agencies. The TSA guy on one of my flights who was looking into the viewer at the x-ray machine had a patch over one eye! He was half blind and was in charge of the x-ray machine!! Needless to say, many of us were detained to have our purses searched because of that suspicious lipstick bomb he saw.