Ace of Spades HQ

April 28, 2012

Why Do You Ask, Elizabeth Warren?
— andy

So it turns out the socialist bint vying to become my next U.S. senator is a Native American™. Well that certainly changes my vote.

Elizabeth WarrenÂ’s avowed Native American heritage Â— which the candidate rarely if ever discusses on the campaign trail Â— was once touted by embattled Harvard Law School officials who cited her claim as proof of their facultyÂ’s diversity.
WarrenÂ’s claim, which surfaced yesterday after a Herald inquiry, put the candidate in an awkward position as campaign aides last night scrambled but failed to produce documents proving her family lineage. Aides said the tales of WarrenÂ’s Cherokee and Delaware tribe ancestors have been passed down through family lore.

She lives on a reservation in Cambridge, Massachusetts referred to as Harvard University. The living conditions there are terrible, or so I hear, with an exorbitant cost of living and high rates of cultural, economic and historical illiteracy.

I, for one, thank Elizabeth "Pocamarxus" Warren for highlighting these issues and wish her well in her future endeavors as a member of the tribal council ... err, faculty. You allowed Harvard to fill not just one but two squares on their diversity bullshit bingo card, Liz. Good for you!

Posted by: andy at 10:24 AM | Comments (178)
Post contains 211 words, total size 2 kb.

1 She lives on a reservation in Cambridge, Massachusetts referred to as Harvard University. The living conditions there are terrible, or so I hear, with an exorbitant cost of living and high rates of cultural, economic and historical illiteracy.

And a high rate of substance abuse.

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 28, 2012 10:27 AM (g8py2)

2 Try and get on the tribal council Casino group with that claim

Posted by: The littl shyning man at April 28, 2012 10:28 AM (sZXWx)

3 This woman boils my pemmican.

Posted by: Running Bear Goldberg at April 28, 2012 10:29 AM (z9HTb)

4 Everyone who has spend six months in Oklahoma claims to be Native American. It is the same as everyone from New England is descended from someone on the Mayflower. As a native born Texan I am descended from Sam Houston, Mirabeau Lamar and Anna Raguet. I am lying and so is Liz.

Posted by: Bob at April 28, 2012 10:30 AM (PJXbW)

Yeah, we get a lot of "Native Americans" here too, most often it is about the casino money. The tribes have spent a lot of time weeding out real descendents from imposters hoping to hone in on the sweet, sweet cash.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 28, 2012 10:31 AM (RZ8pf)

6 What's this 'Native American' BS?
She claims to be part Indian.
(Casino, not convenience store variety)
Or if you prefer:
Feather, not Dot.

Posted by: Dastardly Dan at April 28, 2012 10:31 AM (rvLeh)

7 Shitting Bull

Posted by: xbradtc at April 28, 2012 10:32 AM (nX6AT)

8 I happen to know that I am 1/456 Visigoth.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 28, 2012 10:32 AM (7utQ2)

9 7 Shitting Bull
Screeching Shrew

Posted by: Dastardly Dan at April 28, 2012 10:33 AM (rvLeh)

10 Don't businesses pay taxes that pay for roads and schools and police protection?

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 28, 2012 10:34 AM (KNvk+)

11 To be fair, she is simply a White Native American.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 28, 2012 10:34 AM (7utQ2)

12 Eh. Just feed her some whiskey and a couple 9-point blankets and she'll vote any way you want.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:34 AM (zlvkY)

13 Two Dogs Fucking

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 28, 2012 10:34 AM (Rhie+)

14 She's also part asshole- 98%. Don't doubt her injun cred though, she might have scissored with a chick wearing braids in college.

Posted by: Ms Choksondik at April 28, 2012 10:34 AM (fYOZx)

15 I happen to know that I am 1/456 Visigoth. So did you take part in the Visigoth Pride Parade during Visigoth History Month?

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at April 28, 2012 10:34 AM (R5yLq)

16 Because of this woman, I might send Scott Brown a few bucks.

sigh

Posted by: fluffy at April 28, 2012 10:35 AM (z9HTb)

17 So it turns out the socialist bint vying to become my next U.S. senator is a Native AmericanÂ™.

So who doesn't? I've got Lumbee in my tree, and so also African.

Posted by: toby928© at April 28, 2012 10:35 AM (NG097)

18 The Shawnee wanted to build a casino around here years ago. There is in fact a remnant of the Shawnee around. I know him.

Anyhoo, my late father stood up at a meeting about the proposed casino and said, "Well, shit. We shot 'em out of here once."

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:36 AM (zlvkY)

19 >> Two Dogs Fucking My faith that the horde would get the headline was not misplaced. Well done.

Posted by: Andy at April 28, 2012 10:36 AM (I24y5)

20 I'm half Scotch.

The other half is beer.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:36 AM (zlvkY)

21 Our local Creek tribe got Federal recognition so they could open Wind Creek Casino.

Posted by: toby928© at April 28, 2012 10:37 AM (NG097)

22 I think she has a point. Guy builds a factory, gets roads, police, labor, etc. paid for by us. How dare he think he can get any of that stuff for free... ... he did what? Already paid the bulk of those taxes in the first place??? Nevermind. Elizabeth "Emily Litella" Warren for Senate: She Seems Nice

Posted by: BurtTC at April 28, 2012 10:37 AM (Gc/Qi)

23 mm, yes, and of course my geneology claims queens and kings as my forbears, so i must be a princess like millions of others.
making stuff up is fun!

Posted by: willow at April 28, 2012 10:37 AM (TomZ9)

24 John Stossel did a show wherein he addressed the difference between the welfare nation of reservations and the tribes who are self-sufficient. The contrast was astonishing.

Why would she let her peoples wallow in poverty?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 28, 2012 10:37 AM (piMMO)

25 I am descended from one of the innumerable bastards of a Scottish king. I think he claimed about 750 during his 41 years before he shuffled off this mortal coil. He was a really crappy king because it is apparent what he spent most of his time doing. For real. A big family joke.

Posted by: Bob at April 28, 2012 10:37 AM (PJXbW)

26 I saw in the movies that Indian kids are named after the 1st thing their parents see at birth.

Warren's Indian name is Wrecked Vagina.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 28, 2012 10:38 AM (KNvk+)

27 Aides said the tales of WarrenÂ’s Cherokee and Delaware tribe ancestors have been passed down through family lore. In other words, it's horseshit. She made the claim during her Harvard years to increase her lib cred, someone on the faculty was dumb enough to take it seriously, and now it's come back to bite her in her bony white butt. However racially motivated media will ignore the story, after all, if you have a D behind your name your beyond reproach.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at April 28, 2012 10:38 AM (R5yLq)

28 Can Elizabeth Warren do a Rain Dance?

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 28, 2012 10:38 AM (X3lox)

Stands With A Fister.

Posted by: wheatie at April 28, 2012 10:39 AM (O4AQQ)

30 Her and Obama ate dogs together.

Posted by: jwb7605 at April 28, 2012 10:39 AM (Qxe/p)

Native Americans ate dog, too!

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at April 28, 2012 10:39 AM (wypWv)

32 Always Be Grifting

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 28, 2012 10:40 AM (KNvk+)

33 >>Warren's Indian name is Wrecked Vagina.

Sounds like either an awesome shot or a terrible English dessert.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:40 AM (zlvkY)

34 9 7
Shitting Bull
Screeching Shrew
Two Dogs Fucking

Posted by: Satan's Barbed WeeWee at April 28, 2012 10:40 AM (Jls4P)

35 Lying is fun AND profitable!

Posted by: Terry at April 28, 2012 10:40 AM (i9ia1)

36 Dances with Dog-eater.

Posted by: wheatie at April 28, 2012 10:40 AM (O4AQQ)

37 Squawking Doe

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:40 AM (zlvkY)

38 Elizabeth 'Walking Eagle' Warren, so full of shit she can't fly.

Posted by: davidt at April 28, 2012 10:41 AM (ULGz+)

39 >>Elizabeth 'Walking Eagle' Warren

No-Balled Eagle

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:42 AM (zlvkY)

40 Her Indian name should be "Walking Eagle" because she's so full of shit that she cannot fly.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 28, 2012 10:42 AM (RvlzX)

41 Dang, davidt beat me to it,

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 28, 2012 10:43 AM (RvlzX)

42 Native Americans ate dog, too!

I went and googled Shoshone sausage to set up a joke and it's nowhere to be found. Is this a myth I picked up somewhere?

Posted by: toby928© at April 28, 2012 10:43 AM (NG097)

43 I'm beginning to think this woman might have a dick. It needs to be sniffed.

Posted by: Secret Service Chaperone at April 28, 2012 10:43 AM (IoNBC)

44 Having a strap-on made from old Jeep parts does not make you "part Cherokee".

Posted by: Blanco Basura at April 28, 2012 10:44 AM (xKC/c)

Pants On Fire.

That's her real name.

Posted by: wheatie at April 28, 2012 10:44 AM (O4AQQ)

46 Once the movement for Native American right got going in the 50s and 60s, there was a habit of some Northeastern blue bloods coming out of the woodwork and claiming Indian ancestry through intermarriage during colonial days. I'm willing to bet that's what's going on here. Assuming there's any truth to this, what this actually translates to is "one of my great-great-great-great-great grandfathers married an Indian in the early 1700s."

Posted by: AD at April 28, 2012 10:44 AM (krM9Z)

47 Stands with those that like Fisting

Posted by: lowandslow at April 28, 2012 10:44 AM (GZitp)

48 The only reason she is running is because the Dems can't put "Your Ex-Wife" on the ballot.

Posted by: fluffy at April 28, 2012 10:44 AM (z9HTb)

49 the 'Cherokee Nation' will send anyone a photo ID membership card to any who applies AND PAYS for it. Anyone ( we are all native Americans, yeah ?)

I've had blond, blue-eyed students show me theirs with wink, saying 'for the record' that they're 1/8 Injun. Some colleges give or used to give faculty a list of "minority students" to ""track their progress""

hint-- don't drop or fail these Endangered Once....

Posted by: just a guy who faps at old photos of PGIS at April 28, 2012 10:45 AM (Dll6b)

50 I'm well on my way to hating this woman as much as I hate Nancy Pelosi. And that's quite an accomplishment.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 28, 2012 10:45 AM (V/Aej)

51 >>When political victory is in doubt, claim you're anything but white.

Word.

Posted by: Newt Gingrich at April 28, 2012 10:45 AM (zlvkY)

Posted by: toby928Â© at April 28, 2012 02:35 PM (NG097)

Exactly. Anyone whose family's been here much time at all probably has *some* native blood. So ubiquitous as to not even be cool anymore. She must be really desperate.

Posted by: Polliwog, Teahada hobbit at April 28, 2012 10:46 AM (X8/ER)

53 Smiles not A Lot

Posted by: lowandslow at April 28, 2012 10:46 AM (GZitp)

54 My ancestors were four bears. But one fell out of the tree. He was black. Had a serious craving for 'sweets'. Anyway, the family name was changed to three bears, a beaver, and two prairiedogs.

Posted by: EROWMER at April 28, 2012 10:46 AM (sIm3i)

55 Having a strap-on made from old Jeep parts does not make you "part Cherokee".

Aaa-aaaand ... that one cleared the upper deck, Folks. We have a winner!

Posted by: Bob Eucker at April 28, 2012 10:46 AM (z9HTb)

56 Weren't the Cherokee the ones that just kicked a bunch of blacks off their memberships. The honorary memberships were costing the tribe money, so they said "Adios."

Posted by: 141Driver at April 28, 2012 10:47 AM (UQSBy)

57 >> the 'Cherokee Nation' will send anyone a photo ID membership card to any who applies AND PAYS for it.

Really? The Frau actually IS part Cherokee. That could be a serious help in that "minority owned business"shit.

Yeah. I'll blow someone for money. So sue me.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:47 AM (zlvkY)

58 the membership cards, if you read the small print on the back, were for 'honorary members'.

Posted by: SantaRosaStan, 100% white meat / pork at April 28, 2012 10:48 AM (Dll6b)

59 58 Weren't the Cherokee the ones that just kicked a bunch of blacks off their memberships. The honorary memberships were costing the tribe money, so they said "Adios."

Posted by: 141Driver at April 28, 2012 02:47 PM (UQSBy)

Probably the same local tribe that Ward Churchill bought his heritage from. That was back around 1970, IIRC.

Posted by: jwb7605 at April 28, 2012 10:48 AM (Qxe/p)

60 58 - The tribe said "adios?" RRRAAAAAAAAACIIIIIIISSSSSSSTTTT!!!!!!!!

Posted by: BurtTC at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (Gc/Qi)

61 OK. Which one of you dumbasses was it? http://tinyurl.com/cgse5l6

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (zlvkY)

62 45 Having a strap-on made from old Jeep parts does not make you "part Cherokee".

Too Funny! thanks

Posted by: Dastardly Dan at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (rvLeh)

63 ....so if you wanted the 'Nation' to do some digging to excavate your actual Cherokee ancestors, that would cost you a lot of extra coin.

Posted by: SantaRosaStan, 100% white meat / pork at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (Dll6b)

64 White woman speak with cunning tongue.

Posted by: nickless at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (MMC8r)

65 I, for one, am extremely proud of my Native American ancestry. And dicks.

Posted by: Secret Service Chaperone at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (IoNBC)

66 Another white Indian. Why do these vermin infest liberal college campuses?

Posted by: Sticky Wicket at April 28, 2012 10:50 AM (L7hol)

67 Just like Southpark: http://tinyurl.com/6rewb9t

Posted by: notropis at April 28, 2012 10:52 AM (cjcCc)

From Wikipedia

The Cherokee Freedmen Controversy is an ongoing political and tribal dispute between the Cherokee Nation of Oklahoma and descendants of the Cherokee Freedmen regarding tribal citizenship. During the American Civil War, the Cherokee who supported the Union abolished the practice of African slavery by act of the Cherokee National Council in 1863. The Cherokee Freedmen became citizens of the Cherokee Nation in accordance with a treaty made with the United States government a year after the Civil War ended. In the early 1980s, the Cherokee Nation administration amended citizenship rules to require direct descent from an ancestor listed in the "Cherokee By Blood" section of the Dawes Rolls. The change stripped descendants of the Cherokee Freedmen of citizenship and voting rights unless they satisfied this new criterion.

Posted by: 141Driver at April 28, 2012 10:52 AM (UQSBy)

69 Hunt not the Squaw in sensible moccasins.

Posted by: Ancient Cherokee Secret at April 28, 2012 10:52 AM (wypWv)

70 My cat has more Cherokee DNA than she does

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 10:53 AM (lpWVn)

71 Is she related to that other famous native American Ward Churchill?

Posted by: nick at April 28, 2012 10:53 AM (aij2o)

72 Hat Tip: Me at Acebook. Anyway, Democrats didn't care that Abe Blumenthal was a phony Vietnam vet, why would they care that Liz Warren is a phony Indian?

Posted by: Gregory of Yardale at April 28, 2012 10:53 AM (azHfB)

73 It's so unfair that she can check two boxes, while I can't check any. Unfair.

Posted by: The littl shyning man at April 28, 2012 10:53 AM (HgVYw)

74 She made the claim during her Harvard years to increase her lib cred

Having the native American box checked gives extra points during grad school selections and is almost better than tenure as a professor.

Woman - check
Minority - check

If she's gay, and has any sort of disability, she's got the superfecta of minority status chits mojo working.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at April 28, 2012 10:54 AM (1tPrB)

75 This dipshittery deserves its own thread --

tiny.cc/t0nhdw

'United Against the War on Women'

If you're on twitter, have at it!

Posted by: laceyunderalls at April 28, 2012 10:54 AM (HpKSk)

76 Why do we call them Native Americans? They're really native Siberians.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at April 28, 2012 10:55 AM (X3lox)

'United Against the War on Women'

Time to dig out the old 'Iron My Shirt' photo...

Posted by: garrett at April 28, 2012 10:56 AM (wypWv)

78 I just don't see how someone can understand the fine points of legislative maneuvering when she's still awed by the white man's thunderstick.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:56 AM (zlvkY)

79 Speciesism!

Posted by: Two Dogs Fucking at April 28, 2012 10:56 AM (IoNBC)

80 Yeah I'm descended from Attila the Hun, Super Man and Dick Butkus. Family lore says so.

Posted by: Jones in CO at April 28, 2012 10:57 AM (8sCoq)

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 02:56 PM (zlvkY)

Buy that man a shot of Fire Water. On me.

Posted by: garrett at April 28, 2012 10:57 AM (wypWv)

82 More genius from Harvard:
http://tinyurl.com/6qdnqdr

Remember these are our best and brightest. Future leadership in a cabinet position. Top men indeed.

Posted by: BlueFalcon in Boston at April 28, 2012 10:57 AM (KCvsd)

83 >>Yeah I'm descended from Attila the Hun, Super Man and Dick Butkus. Family lore says so.

Note to self: Don't drink with Jones.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 10:58 AM (zlvkY)

84 Did Che Boy ever get elected Queen of France?

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 10:58 AM (lpWVn)

85 Iron Eyes Warren in heap big trouble!

Posted by: tad blatherton at April 28, 2012 10:59 AM (HueOF)

86 I no move.

Posted by: Big Chief Bowels at April 28, 2012 11:01 AM (IoNBC)

87 Unfortunately, she's not the Last of the Motaxin's.

Posted by: Waterhouse at April 28, 2012 11:01 AM (IoPso)

88 I'd hit it.

And she'd get smallpox from my blanket, so she wouldn't call obsessively afterwards.

Win-win.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 11:02 AM (zlvkY)

89 85 They can't articulate an entire sentence without an edit.

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 11:03 AM (lpWVn)

90 I ain't votin' for the bitch.

Posted by: Everyone in Connecticut named "Armstrong" or "Custer" at April 28, 2012 11:03 AM (zlvkY)

91 Having a strap-on made from old Jeep parts does not make you "part Cherokee".

****

ZING!!!!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 28, 2012 11:03 AM (piMMO)

92 Unless things have changed what is being said about the Cherokee nation ID's might not be entirely accurate. My great grandfather was full blood Cherokee. I have a copy of his birth certificate. Some years back I phoned the nation down in Oklahoma and they seemed to want to make it very hard for me to get on the rolls and get a certificate of density of Indian blood. And no, it wasn't about money. It was about heritage. Though I wouldn't have turned down the lifetime hunting/fishing/trapping license that would have come with it.

Posted by: teej at April 28, 2012 11:04 AM (Y5LDn)

93 Dances with Grievances

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 11:04 AM (zlvkY)

94 I drive a Grand Cherokee.

Will that get me anything?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 28, 2012 11:04 AM (piMMO)

95
Having a strap-on made from old Jeep parts does not make you "part Cherokee".

No. It makes you McGyver

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 11:05 AM (lpWVn)

96 There'd better not be any talk about releasing your second Chakra's around here. I'm just sayin.'

Posted by: Secret Service Chaperone at April 28, 2012 11:05 AM (IoNBC)

97 White Butch lick with forked tongue

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 11:06 AM (lpWVn)

98 Blah blah blah blah

>lifetime hunting/fishing/trapping license that would have come with it.

*looks for spray on tan and leather chaps*

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 11:06 AM (zlvkY)

Actually, my wife's family has a similar tradition, so she may legitimately have have some "Native American" (I prefer the term "Aboriginal American", being a native American, myself) ancestry. But if its so far back that she can't trace to who it actually is, it's pretty laughable that she would be presented as an example of "ethnic diversity".

Ironically, her ancestry tends to refute popular the Lefty claims of how racist all white people are, and have always been. In another example from my wife's ancestry, some of her ancestors and relatives are buried in a small family cemetery - with an Aboriginal American buried right beside them (this is in central PA). There is a special marker there, due to his service in a certain military conflict we like to call the American Revolution.

In my own ancestry, there was an interesting story of the aboriginals surrounding the ship some of my ancestors arrived on, back in the 1650s. Their colony, New Sweden, had been overtaken by the Dutch while they were en route, and the new masters were turning their ship back. The aboriginals intervened, which resulted in my ancestors staying. It turns out that a ship from the Old World was a rare opportunity for said aboriginals to do some serious shopping, and they were willing to force the issue. Things were not as these guys like to paint it.

Posted by: Optimizer at April 28, 2012 11:07 AM (As94z)

100 >>White Butch lick with forked tongue

An Undersecretary position just opened up.

Posted by: Hillary! at April 28, 2012 11:08 AM (zlvkY)

101 Did Che Boy ever get elected Queen of France? Sadly no. He lost the run-off election in a landslide. Lol

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at April 28, 2012 11:08 AM (R5yLq)

102 Her family owned a Wooden Indian

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 11:08 AM (lpWVn)

103 What's the matter Herr, wake up feeling like the south end of a north bound horse?

Posted by: teej at April 28, 2012 11:10 AM (Y5LDn)

104 Scott Brown made a half-court shot today. Warren claims 1/256th indian ancestory. Only in MA would this even be a race.

Posted by: CAC at April 28, 2012 11:11 AM (ivJTD)

105 Like I was telling this chick in the bar last night, I'm part Irish. When she said she had some Irish in her, I asked if she wanted even MORE Irish in her. For some reason, she stormed off in a huff.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 28, 2012 11:11 AM (Rhie+)

106 >>What's the matter Herr, wake up feeling like the south end of a north bound horse?

Actually, I woke up feeling boobies, today.

But this was a good day.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 11:12 AM (zlvkY)

107 drive a Grand Cherokee.

Will that get me anything?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 28, 2012 03:04 PM (piMMO)

A lot of derisive remarks about the gas mileage.

Posted by: Velvet Ambition at April 28, 2012 11:13 AM (mFxQX)

108 Lies stampede from her mouth, like the mighty buffalo.

Posted by: Chief Runs With Premise at April 28, 2012 11:15 AM (hl09R)

109 I drive a Grand Cherokee. Will that get me anything? Well you can get protested or have it set on fire by the eco-nuts. Other than that.. well, unless your a leftist loon probably not much.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at April 28, 2012 11:15 AM (R5yLq)

110 Better start than I had then sir. *tips hat and goes back out to finish mowing, and trying to remember what a boobeh feels like*

Posted by: teej at April 28, 2012 11:15 AM (Y5LDn)

111 Kid: Do you hate them? Do you hate the progressives now?

Old Man: Conservatives, my son, they believe everything is alive. Not only man and animals. But also water, earth, stone. And also the things from them...
The progressives, they believe EVERYTHING is dead. Stone, earth, animals. And people! Even their own people! If things keep trying to live, progressives will rub them out. That is the difference between them.
And they bullshit way too much.

Posted by: Beto at April 28, 2012 11:15 AM (lpWVn)

112 Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo!
Wampum!
Sasquatch!
Squaw!
Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo!

Posted by: Elizabeth Warren forgot her Universal Translator at April 28, 2012 11:16 AM (hl09R)

113 Ching Chong

Posted by: Rosie Odonnal at April 28, 2012 11:17 AM (lpWVn)

114 Maize!
Geronimo!
Tatunka!

Posted by: Elizabeth Warren, looking for some batteries at April 28, 2012 11:19 AM (hl09R)

115

97 Unless things have changed what is being said about the Cherokee nation ID's might not be entirely accurate. ...

Yeah, teej. .....It has to do with the original Treaties, from what I've picked up in the local newspapers here.

The Tribes have to maintain a certain percentage of 'original' lineage, in order to still claim rights to the Treaties that were signed, way back.

Cheerokee Nation has gotten a lot more conservative, since Wilma Mankiller days. ....They are forming their own bank, insurance company, and have a lot of pumping oil wells, from what I've read.

A lot of the Tribes have their own Health Insurance.....and will let people with only a tiny percentage of Indian blood, get on their insurance plans.....even though they are not allowed on their 'voting rights' rolls.

Posted by: wheatie at April 28, 2012 11:21 AM (O4AQQ)

116 My family lore:

An English farmer that settled in the Can-tuck-ee might have taken up with a squaw woman.

Then he tossed her ass out and married a rich white girl.

True story.

Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 11:22 AM (zlvkY)

117 >>in order to still claim rights to the Treaties that were signed, way back.

Tee hee.

Posted by: Your Friends at the Bureau of Indian Affairs at April 28, 2012 11:23 AM (zlvkY)

118 For some reason, she stormed off in a huff. Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 28, 2012 03:11 PM (Rhie+) Well, she could've stormed off in a minute and a huff.

Posted by: thatcrazyjerseyguy at April 28, 2012 11:28 AM (MbeR6)

119 Part Delaware Indian? Her daddy ran a 7/11 in Dover?

Posted by: CoolCzech at April 28, 2012 11:44 AM (niZvt)

120 Optimizer, there is a great book titled "May Flower" by Nathaniel Philbrick (I think) that makes a similar point about the interaction with the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag. Both groups needed each other for their mutual survival. The Pilgrims needed the Wampanoag in order to gain the foothold in Plymouth and the Wampanoag needed the Pilgrims for their weapons and military skill to fend off other stronger tribes in the wake of a devastating small pox epidemic. Also, some genetic studies are beginning to show that the Americas may have been populated by not only Asians crossing the Bering Straits but also from Neolithic Europeans who followed the ice shelf that extended across the north Atlantic...evidently Europeans have been messing with the Indians for millennia?

Posted by: Big Daddy at April 28, 2012 11:45 AM (zgNcz)

121 122 My family lore: An English farmer that settled in the Can-tuck-ee might have taken up with a squaw woman. Then he tossed her ass out and married a rich white girl. True story. Posted by: Herr Morgenholz at April 28, 2012 03:22 PM (zlvkY) That would make him100 percent moron!

Posted by: CoolCzech at April 28, 2012 11:45 AM (niZvt)

122 And I was sure she was of the Redkunt tribe from the Cambridge area...

Posted by: CoolCzech at April 28, 2012 11:49 AM (niZvt)

123 George Zimmerman is a WHITE hispanic

Liz Warren is a white NATIVE AMERICAN

Got it?

Posted by: The New York Times at April 28, 2012 11:51 AM (Y+DPZ)

124 "Like Jim Carney, democrats don't lie"...
Scanning that quickly I read it as "Jim Carrey". NOW I realize where he lifted the I-can't-lie claim from - Liar Liar!

Posted by: sistrum at April 28, 2012 11:51 AM (AyryN)

125 ... he did what? Already paid the bulk of those taxes in the first place???

Posted by: BurtTC at April 28, 2012 02:37 PM

Doesn't that make her one of those people who give somebody something and then ask for it back .. like an ... uh ..

Posted by: Jerry Seinfeld at April 28, 2012 11:54 AM (Y+DPZ)

126 Lay off my fellow Democrats.

Posted by: Andrew "Kill 'Em All" Jackson at April 28, 2012 11:54 AM (KCuY9)

127 "She lives on a reservation in Cambridge, Massachusetts referred to as Harvard University." They even run a casino: Drop $200,000 in slot machine and then find out if you can get a job with that degree in Critical Grievance Theory.

Posted by: pst314 at April 28, 2012 11:54 AM (mFPMV)

128 Family lore.

Now there's a reliable method of accounting...

Posted by: Blacque Jacques Shellacque at April 28, 2012 11:57 AM (TsNVA)

129 Apparently she's a member of the Ward Churchill branch of the Cherokee. They're not generally found on reservations, but instead inhabit universities and colleges, mostly in the liberal arts departments (no pun intended).

Posted by: chuck in st paul at April 28, 2012 11:58 AM (EhYdw)

130 I've seen Jewish actors who played Indians in the old Westerns who were more Indian than this bint

Posted by: kbdabear at April 28, 2012 11:58 AM (Y+DPZ)

131 I don't understand the headline.

Posted by: Five Dogs in a Circle Jerk at April 28, 2012 12:00 PM (z9HTb)

132 She good woman, no lie...And she love shiny things!

Posted by: Chief Slow Joe at April 28, 2012 12:00 PM (/bywF)

133 She may be related to Chere. Or that Italian crying fake environmental keep American Beautiful, Indian. But as the progs will say who cares if their fake as long as the message gets out.

Posted by: Buffalobob at April 28, 2012 12:03 PM (qiFDD)

134 135 chuck in st paul "Apparently she's a member of the Ward Churchill branch of the Cherokee. They're not generally found on reservations, but instead inhabit universities and colleges, mostly in the liberal arts departments (no pun intended)." Where they earn a living carving grievances out of dead branches they collect from the forest of failed ideologies.

Posted by: pst314 at April 28, 2012 12:04 PM (mFPMV)

135 Where they earn a living carving grievances out of dead branches they collect from the forest of failed ideologies.

Ooooh, good one!

Posted by: professional student looking to score some grant money at April 28, 2012 12:08 PM (z9HTb)

136 Europeans were "intermixing" with East-coast Indian tribes for centuries. The "fishing foothold" was a *long* time before 1492. And probably a third of the country has Cherokee blood (as do I, known and recorded ancestor, not rumor). Those people sure got the fuck around. When possible I prefer to describe Indians by tribal name, for the same basic reason I mostly call people by the name they call themselves, rather than "hey you, honkey!"

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 28, 2012 12:11 PM (bxiXv)

137

Ugh--she not welcome in my tee pee--don't want her on the inside of tee pee pissing out. She can go live with Rotten Bear-and I'll stand outside Bear's tee pee pissing in.

Of course it get cold on prairie at night--maybe if get cold enough to be a "two dog night", I'll hire Elizabeth Warren and Hillary Clinton---three dog night--add choice of Janet Napolitano or Nancy Pelosi.

Posted by: Comanche Voter at April 28, 2012 12:12 PM (6USwK)

138 She'll fuck anything for a handful of beads

Posted by: Mr. Wonderful at April 28, 2012 12:13 PM (z8HSj)

139 >>she'll fuck anything<< I'm gonna cop to what a lot of palefaces are thinking. I'd fuck that Injun.

Posted by: General Zod at April 28, 2012 12:31 PM (2+bRt)

140 I'd fuck that Injun.

Really? Have you listened to her?

Posted by: guy who jammed icepicks in his ears at April 28, 2012 12:35 PM (z9HTb)

141 Woman's tongue like aspen leaf, will flap with slightest breeze.

Posted by: Ancient Cherokee Saying at April 28, 2012 12:40 PM (ULGz+)

142 It doesn't really need to be said at this point but she's a f*cking liar. I have verifiable documentation that my great-grandmother was born on the Cherokee Reservation but they wouldn't give me the time of day when I tried to register due to not recognizing my 1/8 bloodline. I would have said it was my blond hair and blue eyes but I never got past the email stage.

Posted by: slug at April 28, 2012 12:41 PM (vVv3V)

143 I'd fuck that Injun. Posted by: General Zod at April 28, 2012 04:31 PM (2+bRt) I have never been that drunk.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 28, 2012 12:44 PM (bxiXv)

144 >>have you listened to her?<< Yep, but Talks Like River got no problem a gimp-hood wouldn't fix.

Posted by: General Zod at April 28, 2012 12:46 PM (2+bRt)

145 C'mon, people! Haven't you ever had one of those days where you're cutting the grass and the mower quits, and you've just crushed the last Bud in the garage fridge, and it's hot, and you kneel down to take out the sparkplug and you get dogshit on your knee, and then skin your knuckles trying to wrench the plug out of the mower? And you just wanna...grudge-fuck something? That's what I'm preachin'. What's love got to do, got to do with it?

Posted by: General Zod at April 28, 2012 12:51 PM (2+bRt)

146 "An English farmer that settled in the Can-tuck-ee might have taken up with a squaw woman." "Then he tossed her ass out and married a rich white girl." I think that probably happened a lot on the frontier, because white mountain men arrived a lot earlier than single white women in any numbers. Some of my relatives do Washington State pioneer history, and there's a well-documented case in one of their books of the exact same thing happening. Of course, there was also a lot of legal difficulty with mixed marriages once civilization arrived in those parts. In general, if your family has been in the US a long time and lived in frontier areas, there's actually a very good chance of real Indian ancestry. My amateur historian relatives have tracked the descendants of a number of Indian wives, and they not infrequently became the ancestors of very prominent, successful, very white people.

Posted by: Amy P at April 28, 2012 12:58 PM (J4kdf)

147 So is she saying she's an Affirmative Action hire?

Posted by: I'm the Honey Badger, BITCH! at April 28, 2012 01:04 PM (kuXrV)

148 I saw the photo ID cards--actual cards from actual people, identifying them as members of the Cherokee Nation.

One of the card-holders said he was 1/8 Cherokee and identified himself to the college as 'Native American' ---with that photo ID card as proof

what I wrote was 'entirely accurate'

Posted by: SantaRosaStan, 100% white meat / pork at April 28, 2012 01:06 PM (Dll6b)

149 The only Indian DNA Elizabeth Warren has in her is when she's doing charity work down at the reservation.

Posted by: Fritz at April 28, 2012 01:09 PM (KWdVT)

150

Haplotype the hag. She likes science, no?

Posted by: tad blatherton at April 28, 2012 01:18 PM (zJ0Rf)

151 Emphasize the "marx" in "Pocamarxus"

Posted by: Mr_Write at April 28, 2012 01:27 PM (HoeMo)

152 My wife is 3/4 Cherokee and has the documentation to prove it. By the way, the Federal Government requires you to have official documentation from your family tree to issue the papers. Warren is not that much older than my wife and this shit hasn't been grandfathered in recently. She has once again beclowned herself again and outed herself as a Democrat, iow, a fucking liar.

Posted by: Samuel Adams at April 28, 2012 01:29 PM (ZOf1l)

153 (I prefer the term "Aboriginal American", being a native American, myself)

Yes, as I assume just about all of us are. Indigenous works for me too. But Native American is just ignorant as a term. Like just about everything else PC.

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 28, 2012 01:31 PM (g8py2)

154 Maude Frickert is an injun?

Posted by: OxyCon at April 28, 2012 01:39 PM (ur8o6)

155

The Cherokee must have been extra friendly because every white person I know who claims to be Indian seems to be part Cherokee.

It's sort of a joke in Oklahoma. I look more Indian than most of the "Indians" I know. Unless she's got a tribal membership card I'm going to call her a liar.

Posted by: digitalbrownshirt at April 28, 2012 01:48 PM (eHwT1)

156 Pocamarxus, that's some funny stuff right there.

Posted by: Oldsailor's poet at April 28, 2012 01:58 PM (ZDUD4)

157
Giving Ward Churchill a blowjob does not mean you now have some Indian in you.

Posted by: Joe Mama at April 28, 2012 02:15 PM (9Hd+d)

158 Chutch was not available for comment.

Posted by: The Other JD at April 28, 2012 02:28 PM (LXrGH)

159

Joe Mama,

What if you swallow?

Posted by: stillers at April 28, 2012 02:29 PM (gVUg0)

160 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at April 28, 2012 02:36 PM (7W3wI)

161 My great-grandfather boned her granny, so her claim is cool, white devils.

Posted by: ward churchill's teepee at April 28, 2012 02:49 PM (nU/dt)

162 45 Having a strap-on made from old Jeep parts does not make you "part Cherokee".

Posted by: Blanco Basura at April 28, 2012 02:44 PM (xKC/c)

***********

Winna!

Posted by: Boomer Redneq hates O-fucking-bama at April 28, 2012 03:24 PM (eQnzo)

163 My matrilineal great-great grandmother was a full Cherokee; know her name and have a photo of her. That generation migrated from Mississippi to Oklahoma. One of my great-uncles took advantage of being one quarter Indian and was getting paid in Arkansas. He'd make no mention of his African heritage or his European heritage while doing so. None of that made any difference when he killed a man (white, BTW). He was executed in the 50s for it. Under the record, his race is listed as 'Native American.' His name was Bill Jenkins. http://tinyurl.com/87pe9u9 None of the rest of us ever cared about the heritage.

Posted by: baldilocks at April 28, 2012 03:32 PM (6kWFm)

164 The question is, where are the docs? Claiming Indian ancestry is probably more fraudulently claimed than anything except Mayflower ancestry, and Viet Nam vet status. But as with vets, membership in a tribe is heavily documented. Show the docs or she's a liar.

Posted by: Born Free at April 28, 2012 04:07 PM (cnH1l)

165 "Pocamarxus" ftw.

Posted by: thirtyandseven at April 28, 2012 05:25 PM (i1OJe)

166 You should respect this woman's courage in disclosing her ancestry. One's family history is a very important part of who you are. It is not nice to make of someone because of their ancestors. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

Posted by: Anastasia Romanov at April 28, 2012 06:06 PM (Uh+y6)

167 In fact, she looks a lot like one of my cousins. Gee, that means I could be a Native American too! Wouldn't that be exciting?

Posted by: Anastasia Romanov at April 28, 2012 06:08 PM (Uh+y6)

168 I am half Cherokee, 1/4 Apache, 1/4 Seneca. And I am offended that she was allowed to be called Native officially.

I am not offended that she referred to herself as Indian; she probably does have Indian ancestors.

But if she got any kind of special status at Harvard, she and the University both should be apologizing in public. My children had to provide paperwork to go to OSU.

Posted by: LurkingInjun at April 28, 2012 07:13 PM (33IG5)

169 "She lives on a reservation in Cambridge, Massachusetts referred to as Harvard University."

Have a quick look at what happened to the first natives who went to Harvard. Go ahead.
http://tinyurl.com/cz3x4kd
I wish the same for her. But quicker.

My mother was Ojibwa enough to get tribal membership, but she was too proud. And worried it might compromise the career of her brother, who was a colonel. When I talked to them about it, they said something about "mother blood," and that was the end of it. My father's family has a touch of the matzoh-brush, so to speak; needless to say they never played that up.

So a girl took me home to meet Mom. Mom was raised old-order Mennonite. I asked if she was an Alsatian. Dodging that, she joked, "I'm a Jewish Indian." I said we were going to get along fine. We have, too.

Posted by: Comatus at April 28, 2012 07:37 PM (ZOlM3)

170 I love you for the title of this post.
That is the only joke I know, and I love you for the reference.

Posted by: MayBee at April 29, 2012 01:02 AM (a9wIo)

171 If you follow the stupid, you'll eventually end up at the DNC.

Posted by: Vacuumjockey at April 29, 2012 03:16 AM (ffLXQ)

172 ...I'd hit it....

Posted by: Ward Churchill at April 29, 2012 05:54 AM (LWy3d)

173 How many scalps on her teepee?

Posted by: torabora at April 29, 2012 07:34 AM (JHOEK)

174 Easy enough to prove through DNA.

Posted by: independent thinker at April 29, 2012 05:22 PM (+oksp)

175 These guys actually expect people to vote for someone based on who their ancestors were?

Virtually everyone who can trace their ancestry back to the early days of European settlement in North America is descended from the one or more tribes of aboriginal peoples for which there really is no good generic name.

Calling them "Native Americans" is just leftist PC lie-speak.

Take the Cherokee for example. They are a culture and formerly sovereign nation that pre-dates colonization by the British or the formation of the United States of America. Calling a member of that group a "Native American" has got to be one of the biggest insults around considering that it was Americans who drove them west on the trail of tears. America is the nation which conquered them. To call a Cherokee "Native American" is kind of like calling an Armenian a Native Turk.

Calling them Indians or American Indians is just bad geography.

But whatever you want to call the American Aborigines, anyone whose family didn't just get off the boat can trace our ancestry to one or more of their tribal groups.

Warren's people are crazy to think that this makes her special, and even more crazy to think that it matters. Anyone who would vote for (or against) a candidate based upon the ethnicity of their ancestors is mentally ill.

Posted by: Lee Reynolds at April 30, 2012 07:56 AM (rJMw2)

176 What a fake, what a fraud, what a loser, Please just go away, the gig is up, you will get spanked by Scott Brown!

Posted by: Milt at May 01, 2012 07:27 AM (re/VS)

177 Wow this is soo helpful I have been trying to figure this out on my own for a long time now. Hopefully making this change will help encourage discussion on my blog.

Posted by: Kristin Cashore Bitterblue iBooks at May 03, 2012 04:35 PM (dgVis)

178 You really make it seem so uderstandable with your presentation but I find this topic before really hard to understand. It seems too complicated and very broad for me.

Posted by: Born of Silence ePub at May 03, 2012 05:29 PM (SqHXv)

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