May 19, 2013

Forrest Gump II [CBD]
— Open Blogger

First treatment of the planned sequel to Forrest Gump.

[Casting notes: Tom Hanks is too fat, but he has demonstrated that he can lose the weight, so let's try to get him to reprise his role. Haley Joel Osment is perfect for Forrest Jr. because he is a druggie, and has no career to speak of]

Prologue: Forrest is told by his doctor that he has AIDS, contracted from his grasping harpy of a dead wife. 1. In a panic, he begins to run, this time South to North, but fails to understand the effects of cold on exposed flesh. He loses two fingers on his right hand, all of his toes, and the tip of his nose to frostbite during a storm outside of Winnipeg.

2. He returns to Alabama to care for Forrest Junior, who becomes increasingly difficult to handle as he grows older and discovers that his father really is a dumb-shit.

3. Forrest Jr. begins to dabble in drugs and petty crime, and soon attracts the attention of the local police chief, who blackmails Forrest Sr. into paying him to keep Jr. out of jail.

4. Forrest Sr. finds Forrest Jr. shooting heroin, but believes his son’s explanation that “it’s just medicine for cold and cough.” Forrest Sr. tries it, and is soon a full-blown junkie. Because he hasn’t told his son that he has AIDS, Forrest Jr. shares his needles with his father, and soon is diagnosed with AIDS.

5. Forrest Sr. depletes his savings paying off the sheriff and trying every quack remedy and becomes destitute.

6. Camera pulls away as father and son run maniacally through the yard of the foreclosed house, chasing a feather.

Fin

Posted by: Open Blogger at 12:15 PM | Comments (395)
Post contains 242 words, total size 2 kb.

1 I see ace loaned you the time machine that he totally doesn't have. Can I borrow it for a minute? I promise not to fuck up history again.

Posted by: DC in Towson at May 19, 2013 12:14 PM (jIaZt)

2 Speechless.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 12:14 PM (K+I6z)

3 Oh my... you guys...

Posted by: Yip at May 19, 2013 12:14 PM (/jHWN)

4 Auteur!

Posted by: Skip Tracer at May 19, 2013 12:15 PM (2+bRt)

5 2-1 Boston over the Rangers, 2nd period.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 12:16 PM (K+I6z)

6 I'll give you $500 million for it. Shatner can direct.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at May 19, 2013 12:16 PM (MMC8r)

7 Huh. CBD, where the heck is the barbecue thread.

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:16 PM (4Mv1T)

8 CBD, I assume you thought this up. How fast did it take?

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 12:16 PM (K+I6z)

9 The feel good movie of 2013?

Posted by: Minuteman at May 19, 2013 12:16 PM (YOWAW)

10 It's like a slice of Obamamericana.

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at May 19, 2013 12:17 PM (MMC8r)

11 CBD, Is there going to be a Game of Thrones thread?

Posted by: perdogg at May 19, 2013 12:18 PM (ziD3M)

12 CBD; did you mean Forest Junk?

Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 12:18 PM (53z96)

13 >>>I assume you thought this up. How fast did it take? Let me get this one. As long as it takes your average male in the men's room. IYKNWIMAITYD

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:18 PM (4Mv1T)

14 Does Honey Boo Boo make a cameo appearance?

Posted by: Minuteman at May 19, 2013 12:18 PM (YOWAW)

15 ...with 'Freebird' playing as the two fools painfully expire on the crabgrass lawn?

Posted by: Skip Tracer at May 19, 2013 12:18 PM (2+bRt)

16 CBD, where the heck is the barbecue thread.

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 04:16 PM (4Mv1T)

Believe it or not, that is going to take some real research. it's a topic near and dear to me, so I don't want to toss something up (unlike the above).

#twoweeks

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 12:18 PM (O6Tmi)

17 Life is like a box of leaky condoms. You never know what you're gonna get!

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 12:19 PM (niZvt)

18 BTW, I hated the original movie.  I should have known it was a POS because everyone was hyping it like it shit golden eggs.

Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 12:19 PM (53z96)

19 It's like Forrest Gump meets Philadelphia!

Posted by: Harvey Weinstein at May 19, 2013 12:20 PM (MMC8r)

20 Posted by: perdogg at May 19, 2013 04:18 PM (ziD3M)

My wife and I are two weeks behind on GOT, so it won't be coming from me.

But damn, it would be fun!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 12:20 PM (O6Tmi)

21 Needs Hooker's and blow

Posted by: Guido at May 19, 2013 12:20 PM (9YDlD)

22 Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 04:19 PM (53z96)

Well, it wasn't awful, but as you can see, there were some themes that irritated me in the first one.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 12:21 PM (O6Tmi)

23

Did I hear somebody say "Forest Dump"?

 

 

The answer is "yes, yes  I  do."

Posted by: A Bear at May 19, 2013 12:21 PM (pxDth)

24 Life is like a box of chocolates. You meet a nice man at the leather bar who gives you one from his Whitmans Sampler box. Hours later, you wake to find yourself handcuffed you to his basement jungle-jim, a ball gag in your mouth and, because you're wearing a stinking sock as a blindfold, you never know what you're gonna get.

Posted by: Skip Tracer at May 19, 2013 12:22 PM (2+bRt)

25 I want some of what you're doing.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 12:22 PM (piMMO)

26 And guns. Someone needs to get offed

Posted by: Guido at May 19, 2013 12:22 PM (9YDlD)

27 Can't be any worse than Hanks' next movie where he's a boat captain of a ship taken by Somali pirates.

Posted by: buzzion at May 19, 2013 12:22 PM (LI48c)

28 >>>#twoweeks Outstanding! Give us a heads up so we can buy extra beer. Guaranteed to be an epic flame war in the comments.

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:23 PM (4Mv1T)

29 It's just this war and that lying son of a bitch Johnson Bush...

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 12:24 PM (MMC8r)

30 Gump Fiction: Forrest finds himself as a hitman.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 12:25 PM (MMC8r)

31 Does Forest show up in the background in a future historian's film footage of the SCOAMF's impeachment trial?

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:25 PM (IC6Er)

32 Forrest Gump meets Gary Sinese and the Lt. Dan band in Savannah, GA.

http://tinyurl.com/ajvqmb8

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 19, 2013 12:26 PM (lVPtV)

33 30 Gump Fiction:

Forrest finds himself as a hitman.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 04:25 PM (MMC8r)

 

Its been done  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dymb0SvHCnY

Posted by: buzzion at May 19, 2013 12:26 PM (LI48c)

34 Life is like a box of chocolates. A cheap, thoughtless, perfunctory gift that nobody ever asks for. Unreturnable because all you get back is another box of chocolates. So you're stuck with this undefinable whipped mint crap that you mindlessly wolf down when there's nothing else left to eat. Sure, once in a while there's a peanut butter cup or an English toffee. But they're gone too fast and the taste is... fleeting. So, you end up with nothing but broken bits filled with hardened jelly and teeth-shattering nuts. And if you're desperate enough to eat those, all you got left is an empty box filled with useless brown paper wrappers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0acEl97ZBME

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 12:27 PM (hO8IJ)

35 Forrest Gump comes in third place in a one-legged-man ass-kicking contest.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 12:28 PM (pxDth)

36 It's Sunday and CBD is drunk.

Posted by: L, elle at May 19, 2013 12:28 PM (IyUTN)

37 Gump Fiction:

Forrest finds himself as a hitman.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 04:25 PM (MMC8r)


always wanted to steal the title of this Christian show titled Pope Fiction for a hitman Pope

Posted by: The Dude at May 19, 2013 12:29 PM (vJdyz)

38

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 04:27 PM (hO8IJ)

 

*****

 

And that one nasty maple-flavored one.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 12:29 PM (pxDth)

39 Yeah, I'm trying to understand why a movie where the two major female characters are portrayed as whores, pretty much explicitly, is so family friendly and uplifting. 

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Take us away. at May 19, 2013 12:29 PM (Gk3SS)

40 That made me choke up, it was so moving. No, wait, just gassy. Onions.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at May 19, 2013 12:29 PM (Up4f+)

41 A little mood music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQwWaWFjd0Y

Posted by: The Political Hat at May 19, 2013 12:29 PM (Vk2pI)

42 Make sure you get money up front or gross profits.

Posted by: Michael Moore'd in the Boobeh at May 19, 2013 12:30 PM (rCS6C)

43 Jane- Was that Hanks?

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:30 PM (4Mv1T)

44 And that one nasty maple-flavored one.

Burns: Anything left?
Smithers: Uh, only the sour quince log, sir.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 12:31 PM (hO8IJ)

45 #24 Did that really happen to you?

Posted by: occam at May 19, 2013 12:32 PM (DAHhf)

46 Stupid is.

Posted by: Skip Tracer at May 19, 2013 12:32 PM (2+bRt)

47 I found Tom Hanks very believable in the roll. I found 'Jenny' very believable in her roll. They actually represented quite well the people of that era. Dumb as shit, with the moral values of alley cats, actually believing that 'the whole world is watching' and that they were 'changing the world'. All the dumb fucks did was prolong a stupid war and embolden the enemy. Jane Fonda is still a ctupid sunt.

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 12:32 PM (U2UQk)

48 43 Jane- Was that Hanks?

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 04:30 PM (4Mv1T




No, he's a local actor who also does tours as Forrest.  I'll see if I can find a better video.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 19, 2013 12:34 PM (lVPtV)

49 I have no knowledge of that.

Posted by: Jay Carney at May 19, 2013 12:34 PM (5fSr7)

50 Once again I am reminded how Haley Joel Osment passed on the role of Harry Potter because the films couldn't live up to the books and any number of other pretentious actor comments when he was still being lavished in praise for The Sixth Sense. Careers, who needs them right?

Posted by: Bete resigned to just watching the world burn at May 19, 2013 12:34 PM (Lqb+9)

51 Dumb as shit, with the moral values of alley cats, actually believing that 'the whole world is watching' and that they were 'changing the world'.

And their grandchildren are doing the same shit.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 12:35 PM (hO8IJ)

52 I was hoping for a grittier, darker treatment.

Posted by: Javems at May 19, 2013 12:36 PM (c8xU9)

53

Just got done dealing with a massive cheating incident in my Advanced Finance class.  Gave the students a take-home Excel assignment.  Of the 52 in the class, 17 shared work on an "individual" assignment (including a group of 11 who shared the same file).  Unbeknownst to them, I had a hidden macro running in the file (they couldn't access the file's data unless VBA was enabled, so they were forced to have it running) that logged who had accessed the file, the name of their computer and ID, and when. 

End result: 1/3 of the class got nailed cheating.  Most of the cheaters were graduating seniors, with graduation this weekend.   So since I didn't want to have to go through the formal cheating judicial process (a real PITA that could have made me miserable for several months), I calibrated the penalty so that every student would lose a full grade level for the class (I.e. a B- instead of an A-, a C instead of a B, and so on).  But before I let them know that, I let them think that they weren't going to be graduating for a few days.  Of the 17, all 17 took it and went away with their tails between their legs, because they knew with what I was able to document, I could fry their little asses if I wanted.

Our Assistant Dean who handles all cases of academic dishonest was left sputtering.  She's a flaming liberal feminist (but I repeat myself) who always takes the students' side in cases like this.  But she had to admit that there was no other possibility but that the little rat-bastards (and bastardettes) cheated, because machine data don't lie.

Net result - 17 new scalps on my office door.  And word got out that I have near-mystical powers to catch cheating.  I didn't want them to know about the macro, so I gave them some story about digital footprints and our Computer Science Department's major in Digital Forensics. 

Good times, good times.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:38 PM (IC6Er)

54 Mama always told me.  " Life is like a bottle of Value-Rite vodka, never know if you are going to go blind or not".   heh

Posted by: t-dubyah-d at May 19, 2013 12:39 PM (u6lBN)

55 The drug charge was from seven years ago. Osment has since graduated from college.

Posted by: Vince Smetana at May 19, 2013 12:39 PM (FljB0)

56

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:38 PM (IC6Er)

 

*****

 

Are you expecting any incoming flak from meddling mommies and daddies?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 12:41 PM (pxDth)

57 Unbeknownst to them, I had a hidden macro running in the file

<Cameron Frye> RightWingProg, you're my hero.</Cameron Frye>

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 12:41 PM (hO8IJ)

58 This guy works as Forrest on several local tours.  Video isn't great, but I've seen him and he's pretty good.  Tourists (or "tourons" as we call them) go nuts.


http://tinyurl.com/a3honnr

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 19, 2013 12:42 PM (lVPtV)

59 Now we know who stole CAC's stash.

Posted by: Andy at May 19, 2013 12:42 PM (OZPoa)

60 CBD- You know. To really research the finest traditions of barbecue, and all its origins, it will require a road trip.

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:42 PM (4Mv1T)

61 Eh. I liked Forrest Gump. It valued virtue. As opposed to Pulp Fiction, which it beat for the Oscar, which I thought was a real cesspool.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 12:42 PM (MMC8r)

62 wtf is the point of this? pretty f***ing stupid if you asked me, but you didnt & ima say it anyway.

Posted by: MikeD at May 19, 2013 12:42 PM (iZiIb)

63 This has Uwe Boll masterpiece splattered all over it.

Posted by: Chandler's Ghost at May 19, 2013 12:43 PM (9JS/n)

64 And their grandchildren are doing the same shit. Except with at least minus twenty IQ points and a free ObamaPhone, free oral contraception, free condoms, and over-the-counter Plan B for 15 year old pubescent girls. Forward Comrades!

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 12:43 PM (U2UQk)

65 Cut! Print it.

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 12:43 PM (sdi6R)

66 We need a scene where Romney hires Forrest to run his campaign. Forrest tells him to be nice and to not criticize Obama who he thinks is Bubba's more retarded brother.

Posted by: WaltusRex at May 19, 2013 12:43 PM (VlXYw)

67 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:38 PM (IC6Er



Every single one of those little bastards could go to work in the Obama WH right now.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 19, 2013 12:43 PM (lVPtV)

68 @52: How about "Gump, MD," a heartwarming medical malpractice comedy centered around Forrest getting accepted to Med School on a special disability waiver. After earning his Participation Diploma, he establishes a brain surgery practice, leaving in his wake hordes of damaged individuals that all speak like Gabbie Giffords. "Surgery is like a crapshoot. You never know what you'll be able to say."

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 12:44 PM (niZvt)

69 RightWingProf I don't know, if there were any OWS types it might have been worth them learning consequences before they get employed and show the same lack of accountability when the go to work for the IRS and have you audited every year.

Posted by: Bete resigned to just watching the world burn at May 19, 2013 12:44 PM (Lqb+9)

70 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:38 PM (IC6Er) *Applauds*

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 12:44 PM (K+I6z)

71

Seamus:

Probably not.  I set the penalty such that it would hurt but not maim them.  And I let them know that if they accepted it, it would stay at this level, and in my control. 

However, if they wanted to protest it, it would involve a formal hearing, and at that point, anything could happen, since it was out of control.  I then let them know that my department chair was a real bastard about cheating due to being Chinese, and my Dean was worse.  And with the data I had, they know they'd probably lose.

Given this, I doubt any of them even talked with their folks.   I know if I'd been caught that dead to rights, I wouldn't have told my folks.

 

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:44 PM (IC6Er)

72 Hitler really was an idiot. Why he thought he could ever succeed in Russia beats me. It was too large and the troops would be cut off in the middle of nowhere. As they said, only two fools were unaware that Russia got freezing cold in winter: Adolph and Napoleon. Seriously, you guys, a major boner.

Posted by: Waldo Truth at May 19, 2013 12:45 PM (w+oEo)

73 Wow. Haley Joel Osment looks like his face stayed exactly the same size and his head grew around it.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 12:45 PM (MMC8r)

74 RightWingProf Nice work. Did you go under a different nic (if) at LFG? Chris the something-or-other?

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 12:47 PM (U2UQk)

75 Bring out the Gump.

Posted by: Zed at May 19, 2013 12:47 PM (4Qfnw)

76

Name Withheld

No- this is the only name I use unless I'm baiting trolls on Kos or other left-wing cesspool.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:48 PM (IC6Er)

77 "...and discovers that his father really is a dumb-shit."

I almost choked on the sandwich I was eating as I read this...

Posted by: Blacque Jacques Shellacque at May 19, 2013 12:48 PM (9+PGS)

78

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:44 PM (IC6Er)

 

*****

 

The pervasiveness of that mindset not just in college, but throughout society is truly mind-boggling.  With all the hemming and hawing, rationalization of behavior, parsing of terminology, cover-ups and downright blatant dishonesty from the government, the press and other sectors, the one word that has kept popping into my mind the last few weeks is...

 

...integrity. 

 

Where has it gone?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 12:49 PM (pxDth)

79 RightWingProf

nice.  Thanks for the heartwarming story.  I like happy endings like justice and comeuppance

Posted by: Yip at May 19, 2013 12:50 PM (/jHWN)

80 54 RWP " thunderous applause !!!!!!" Well played !!!! Great job !!!!

Posted by: Extremely grumpy momma bear at May 19, 2013 12:52 PM (lxnDI)

81

Seamus - a colleague and I are starting a large-scale study on cheating in college.  we have  priors that a lot more occurs than we want to admit.  Even so, I think we're going to be surprised.   In many ways, this semester's assignment was a perfect storm of events that led to cheating on my students' part - the same assignment for each student, it was much harder than they thought, the students had access to a lab where no one checked so they could work together, and they were graduating seniors who just wanted to be done with school.

But even so, the chutzpah of these student in working together in a group of 11 is pretty mind-boggling.  But I got the little buggers, so I can enjoy the weekend. and I'm done teaching until fall.

 

 

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:53 PM (IC6Er)

82 RightWingProf, I sure hope your Advanced Finance students don't get hired by the IRS...

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 12:53 PM (FcR7P)

83 >>>Where has it gone? To hell. ...and I blame the media, and the average american who consumes the entertainment and TV blather the media spews.

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:55 PM (4Mv1T)

84 The only thing that I forgot to tell them all as they left my office was "now get the hell off my lawn!"

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:55 PM (IC6Er)

85 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:38 PM (IC6Er)

Well....that certainly kicked the shit out of my post.

Well done sir! 

Well done!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 12:55 PM (O6Tmi)

86 Isn't Obama available?

Posted by: pat at May 19, 2013 12:55 PM (LLHgu)

87 WASHINGTON (AP) — The president and chief executive officer of The Associated Press on Sunday called the government's secret seizure of two months of reporters' phone records "unconstitutional" and said the news cooperative had not ruled out legal action against the Justice Department. http://preview.tinyurl.com/acwgaye

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 12:56 PM (MMC8r)

88

t-bird @86

If so, I can always leave the country or go Galt.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:56 PM (IC6Er)

89 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:53 PM (IC6Er)

In every large class I took in college there was cheating. And it was pretty damned obvious too, so clearly I wasn't the only person to notice it.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 12:57 PM (O6Tmi)

90 I'm touched. This is my first successful thread-jacking.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 12:57 PM (IC6Er)

91 The possibility of a female to male transmission of HIV is  extraordinarily low.  Not so low as to call it impossible, but closer to the chance  of winning a $550 million lottery than it is to the chance of male to male transmission.

I  realize your government will tell you otherwise, but in case you didn't know it, your government doesn't always tell you the truth. 

Posted by: BurtTC at May 19, 2013 12:57 PM (BeSEI)

92 74: the hit man was running out of cash is the reason for the foray into russia. his war time build up was all done on the national credit card.

Posted by: D. Hopper at May 19, 2013 12:57 PM (UsR5V)

93 @92: I'm having too much fun watching Biden Go Gump to leave the country.

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 12:58 PM (niZvt)

94 Our Assistant Dean who handles all cases of academic dishonest was left sputtering. She's aflaming liberal feminist (but I repeat myself) who always takes the students' side in cases like this. Let me guess, she isn't from a field that values...academic integrity. Something that ends in "studies" perhaps?

Posted by: AmishDude at May 19, 2013 12:58 PM (xSegX)

95 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:53 PM (IC6Er)

Keep the names, the data and their finals, and if one of the little rat bastards ever runs for office, trot it out.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 12:59 PM (O6Tmi)

96 >>>This is my first successful thread-jacking. And a damned fine job you did of it. You have taken "going OT" to a whole new level. Something for Morons everywhere to look up to. I certainly will. BraVO.

Posted by: Tobacco Road at May 19, 2013 12:59 PM (4Mv1T)

97 Difficult to see how you could provide a more horrifying sequel to one of the greatest horror movies of all time, but this comes close. Still, you don't have a villain. Need someone as terrifyingly horrific as that evil demonspawn Jenny.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 19, 2013 12:59 PM (OApiq)

98 This is my first successful thread-jacking.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:57 PM (IC6Er)

And your last.....

Posted by: Mr. Ban Hammer at May 19, 2013 01:00 PM (O6Tmi)

99 I took two full years of political philosophy in university; the only book I read through was The Prince because it was short and made sense. For final exams, the prof would give a list of 20 questions, and 3 of them would end up on the exam. He didn't care if you prepared by yourself or in a group. I always prepped in a group. I still consider it miraculous that I got through those classes. He was the only conservative prof on the faculty at the time.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:00 PM (K+I6z)

100 @102 Eeek!

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:00 PM (IC6Er)

101 I want Dennehy to play Lt Dan..... and the boat

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:00 PM (jucos)

102 Damn.  All the plot leak rumors about a move to Miami and taking up life as a Moonie working the Miami airport were bogus.

Posted by: @PurpAv at May 19, 2013 01:01 PM (/gHaE)

103 Meanwhile Iran hangs two men it accused of spying for the US and Israel.
http://tinyurl.com/asuy2m2

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 01:01 PM (zxYv0)

104 CBD-  do you have blogger authority to upgrade Right Wing Prof's AoSHQ membership status from paper to aluminum?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:02 PM (pxDth)

105 105 I want Dennehy to play Lt Dan..... and the boat

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 05:00 PM (jucos)

 

*****

 

Maybe Tom Cruise could play Bubba Gump's Shrimp.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:02 PM (pxDth)

106 Obama: "As An African American You Have To Work Twice As Hard As Anyone Else If You Want To Get By" Yeah, right. No, I haven't watched it and I'm not going to. http://tinyurl.com/a9q3lpy

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 01:03 PM (sdi6R)

107 RWP Reminds me of a prof I had in college who caught some buggers cheating. Two guys turned in essentially the same paper and this prof (being in the Netscape is fab and so new age of the internet) went to his files that he kept of all papers submitted to him and he went digging. Not only did he nail those two guys who were in the present but he also found a pair he had missed in previous years who had submitted their papers in different classes so it didn't trip his radar as part of the "Do not kick us out for cheating" plea was turning in the person they got the papers from and each had gotten it from a different one of the pair. The other part of the plea was that not only did the prof get scalps for his wall, the scalps were named and called out every time the prof did a class and advised against cheating.

Posted by: Bete resigned to just watching the world burn at May 19, 2013 01:03 PM (Lqb+9)

108

seamus:  or maybe they could cut my membership fees in half.

 

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:03 PM (IC6Er)

109 @107 So you're saying they were hung?

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:03 PM (niZvt)

110 112 -

And double the term of service!

Posted by: BurtTC at May 19, 2013 01:04 PM (BeSEI)

111 Obama can cameo as the brother of the shrimp guy, Bubba.

Posted by: pat at May 19, 2013 01:04 PM (LLHgu)

112

@115 - the dumber brother.

 

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:05 PM (IC6Er)

113 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:05 PM (niZvt)

114 Obama: "As An African American You Have To Work Twice As Hard As Anyone Else If You Want To Get By" Sez President Tee Time.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:06 PM (MMC8r)

115

I'd say 117 calls for a rim shot, but that would be wrong.

 

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:06 PM (IC6Er)

116 CoolCzech well they were left swinging in the wind. 

And what staff would the Huma become part of with the Weiner?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 01:06 PM (zxYv0)

117 I have a dear friend from High school posting shit on FB about how racist it is to criticize the president. It's all I can do to prevent myself from shitting all over him. I won't, but I want to.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:06 PM (jucos)

118 117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

 

*****

 

He must have seen the poll results.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:06 PM (pxDth)

119 Nothing like a Weiner joke to get our Morons to stand up at attention.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:07 PM (IC6Er)

120

122 117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff...
Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

*****

 

Did that cause Hillary to prick up her ears?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:09 PM (pxDth)

121 Hey CoolCzech. Good to see you back at the asylum. I missed your wit.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:09 PM (jucos)

122 I have a dear friend from High school posting shit on FB about how racist it is to criticize the president. Because criticizing black people is racist. They're not like white people, they're special. Sacred. Magical.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:09 PM (MMC8r)

123 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:38 PM (IC6Er) Dude, you are EVIL. I bow to the Master.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 19, 2013 01:09 PM (KZ5KD)

124 In other news, 4-2 Boston early in the 3rd period.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:10 PM (K+I6z)

125 @120: Uh, why his Twitter staff, of course. It's been hard up ever since she left it.

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:10 PM (niZvt)

126 I have a dear friend from High school posting shit on FB about how racist it is to criticize the president. It's their trump card. When they play it, they're very nervous.

Posted by: AmishDude at May 19, 2013 01:11 PM (xSegX)

127 I've always found it ironic that both Clintons were PO'd at what Anthony Weiner did.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:11 PM (K+I6z)

128 @125: Don't you tweet? Follow me @CoolCzech1

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:11 PM (niZvt)

129 or maybe they could cut my membership fees in half.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 05:03 PM (IC6Er)

No discounts...Ace just ordered a new hobo trident, and those things are shockingly expensive.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at May 19, 2013 01:11 PM (O6Tmi)

130 129 @120: Uh, why his Twitter staff, of course. It's been hard up ever since she left it.

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:10 PM (niZvt)

 

*****

 

That's really some in-depth reporting.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:11 PM (pxDth)

131 Ace just ordered a new hobo trident, and those things are shockingly expensive.

He couldn't just fashion one out of salvaged bindles?

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 01:12 PM (hO8IJ)

132 126 I have a dear friend from High school posting shit on FB about how racist it is to criticize the president. Preface the criticism with a lament about how terrible it is that SCOAMF's white half keeps dragging his noble black half into the mud.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 19, 2013 01:12 PM (KZ5KD)

133

So far, we're averaging a Weiner joke a minute since the first one.  I know it gets harder to keep it up as the thread gets older, but give it your best shot.

 

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:13 PM (IC6Er)

134

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:53 PM (IC6Er)

 

Were you amazed at the exceptionally high quality of the work, considering it was a collaborative effort from 11 students?

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at May 19, 2013 01:13 PM (AC0lD)

135 I don't tweet but maybe I should. I will Czech it out. G-d Damn I always wanted to say that to you.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:15 PM (jucos)

136 I don't think Forrest Gump II can be written until we find out if Joe Biden becomes President by virtue of being too stupid to have been party to any shenanigans.

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 01:15 PM (+H/dq)

137 So Weiner and Huma invite a Viagra rep for a personal meeting...

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 01:15 PM (zxYv0)

138 'Criticism? That's for WHITE presidents.' Point out that by suggesting that black politicians aren't up to criticism, they're making them less than fully human.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:15 PM (MMC8r)

139

@138

The only good thing abut the incident is that I checked the macro's log files before I started grading the assignments (it was a first time using it, and I was curious about what it would reveal). The results told me that they'd shared the file before I even checked their work.  So I didn't even have to grade 1/3 of the assignments.  Pure win.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:15 PM (IC6Er)

140 I wouldn't mind having Huma on my staff either.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:16 PM (jucos)

141 Forrest, Jr. catches the feather and makes a boa for Jenny.  Boas take off after the ghey community discovers his creation.

Bubba-Boay makes $100M in its first year of operation selling to Elton John fans.

Posted by: Oliver Stoned at May 19, 2013 01:16 PM (2iU3x)

142 Obama Gump Scandals You got yer IRS scandals, yer Benghazi scandals, yer AP scandals... we got EPA scandals, and criminal illegal scandals, cover-up scandals, birther scandals, ...

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 01:16 PM (piMMO)

143 Good work by the way. Congratulations on teaching them a real lesson.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at May 19, 2013 01:17 PM (AC0lD)

144 @139: They all do, Truck... They all do.

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:17 PM (niZvt)

145 I just want to repeat this, because it blows my mind that I live in this type of country now: The IRS delay of conservative groups applications was a denial of their ability to fundraise. A lot of donors will not donate to groups they believe in if they can't get the tax deduction. I have a client right now that has a promise of six months of funding, when and only when, they get their tax-exempt status. Think about that, in the run up to the election the IRS prevented conservative groups from getting money because of their perceived political views. And deliberately kept such a secret until after the election--they wanted to--and likely did--sway the election of President! Meanwhile, every Nazi-supporter Soros group is flush with cash and flaunts their disregard for the law.

Posted by: RoyalOil at May 19, 2013 01:18 PM (VjL9S)

146

117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff... Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

 

*****

 

Isn't that against the penal code?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:18 PM (pxDth)

147 146 All irrelevant!!

Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 01:18 PM (9XBK2)

148 @149: I fail to see what this has to do with Weiner's staff???

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:19 PM (niZvt)

149 Isn't that against the penal code?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 05:18 PM (pxDth)

 

*****

 

Although in his case it is probably just a misdemeanor.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:19 PM (pxDth)

150 @150: I think you mean, the penile code...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:19 PM (niZvt)

151 As they said, only two fools were unaware that Russia got freezing cold in winter: Adolph and Napoleon. Seriously, you guys, a major boner.

Not in a Russian winter.

Posted by: boulder t'hobo at May 19, 2013 01:20 PM (QTHTd)

152 Apparently if you claim your taxes are 'irrelevant' on form 1080/B, you get a pass.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:20 PM (MMC8r)

153 CC-  if you are ever catching so much heat on Twitter that you need to hide out for a while, I could probably cache a small czech.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:20 PM (pxDth)

154

117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff... Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

*****

 

She can type, but can she take dictation?

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:21 PM (pxDth)

155 @157: I'll czech it out, seamus...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:22 PM (niZvt)

156 Hey, no book thread this weekend?  I wanted Ace to know that I finished "The Monster of Florence" - pretty good, though it's disappointing to find that the case is still open at the end.  The main point was the Italian legal system running amok, though, and the book was very good at painting that nightmare.  My favourite part was the description of what happens in Sardinia when people get in trouble with the law.  They brazen it out as far as they can (Italian law doesn't apply to us!) and then when things get tight, they head for the hills and become bandits.  We should start thinking of adopting such a tradition when the Obamafascists tighten the nooses - what would be a good territory to set up Bandit Country?  Somewhere out in the West is the most obvious choice, but we might want to stay close to the Blue States in order to carry out predatory raids - we don't want to plunder our own kind, after all.

Posted by: Dr. Mabuse at May 19, 2013 01:22 PM (FkH4y)

157

117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff... Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

*****

 

A temporary position, only until after the next erection.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:22 PM (pxDth)

158 A zookeeper in Prague disappeared one evening after entering the enclosure of a breeding pair of lions. The case was never solved, because no one believed the chief investigator when he told them the Czech was in the male.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:22 PM (MMC8r)

159 OT - anybody have this place called 'Mothers Nutritional Center' in their area? Supposedly it's popular in Cali (of course.). It's a grocery store that is for the FSA. You go there and give them a list and they'll do the shopping for you while your 19 children are watched over. The prices are extremely inflated but hey, it's not your money. Tax dollars at work baby.

Posted by: RWC at May 19, 2013 01:22 PM (Wl/Ht)

160 Great treatment for FGII everybody, but could we please work in the following scenes?

- In their drug-addicted haze, Forrest & Son decide to have a luau but can't find a pig. Thankfully however, Michael Moore is passing through town. Hilarious hijinks ensue.

- Jane Fonda as a haggard, toothless bag lady who's been forced to resort to begging strangers for dimes to get by, but she always happens to choose the "wrong people" to ask. By the end of the film she's basically self-aware chunks in a jar riding in a rickety wheelchair with a cardboard placard.

- Scenes of Alec Baldwin being kicked hard in the balls, for no particular rhyme or reason.

Box office GOLD!!!!!

Posted by: qdpsteve at May 19, 2013 01:24 PM (7B7jB)

161 @162: there's a Czech gay joke in there, somewhere...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:24 PM (niZvt)

162

117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff... Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

*****

 

I heard the position was for a naval liaison officer.  He wanted to have her back on his dinghy.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:25 PM (pxDth)

163

- Scenes of Alec Baldwin being kicked hard in the balls, for no particular rhyme or reason.

This should be put in as a trailer for every movie for the next two years.  Just because it's funny.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:25 PM (IC6Er)

164 So which of you morons confused Czechs with Chechens, anyway? I couldn't believe it when the Czech ambassador had to give a statement explaining the difference, wearing his "Got Czech?" T-shirt.

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:26 PM (niZvt)

165 RightWingProf: that's what I've been telling 'em!! :-)

Posted by: qdpsteve at May 19, 2013 01:26 PM (7B7jB)

166 165 @162: there's a Czech gay joke in there, somewhere...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:24 PM (niZvt)

 

*****

 

Czech  and  czechmate.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:26 PM (pxDth)

167 If it's racist to criticize the Flaming Douche Of Marxism, then it's also racist to make excuses for him.

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 01:27 PM (6NDno)

168 CC- if you are ever catching so much heat on Twitter that you need to hide out for a while, I could probably cache a small czech. Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 05:20 PM (pxDth) --------------------------------------- Well played. If I ran this joint I would throw him outta here. Bounced Czech.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:29 PM (jucos)

169

Alec Baldwin being kicked hard in the balls

 

*****

 

Objection your honor.  Assumes facts not in evidence.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:29 PM (pxDth)

170 5-2 Bruins over Rangers.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:30 PM (K+I6z)

171 Anybody know of a compiled list of TFG scandals? Need some more material for Subversive Fun 101.

Posted by: RWC at May 19, 2013 01:32 PM (Wl/Ht)

172 So they're saying that Obama should only get 3/5ths the criticism of any previous president, I guess.

Posted by: AmishDude at May 19, 2013 01:32 PM (xSegX)

173 Nobody died in Benghazi. Nobody died in Gosnell's butcher shop. Nobody died from Holder's arms shipments. Because Obama is black, that's why. Now suck it up and pay your $5 trillion bar tab.

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 01:32 PM (b+dLf)

174 Jeebus this thread is deader than Ben Stein's foreskin. Where is everybody from the horde? Is the local strip joint running marathon lap dances again?

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:32 PM (niZvt)

175 I had a high school friend who graduated college with an accounting degree, then went off to work for the IRS. Sort of a 'gateway' job... the idea was to pick up enough experience in the 'enemy' camp to advise clients in the 'real' world. It worked for him. That's the way the system used to work. Now there is no there there... no 'real' world job for them to go to. They're probably pissed off and have decided the Tea Party is what is holding them back from that double six figure Wall Street job. As if. After this, I imagine having 'Ideological Revenue Service' on a resume is not going to have half the value it once had. Sure, every employer wants to hire someone like that. Not. The only way to clean up the mess and insure future employment is to 'clean house' and 'name names' and let the chips fall, all the way to the top, if necessary.

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 01:33 PM (U2UQk)

176

Name Withheld:

They'll probably still be able to get a job - having experience in the enemy camp becomes more important when the enemy can do more damage.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 01:34 PM (IC6Er)

177

166 117 In other news, Weiner telling friends he wants wife Huma back on his staff... Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:05 PM (niZvt)

 

******

 

Then she might have to be treated for a staph   infection.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:34 PM (pxDth)

178 After this, I imagine having 'Ideological Revenue Service' on a resume is not going to have half the value it once had. Sure, every employer wants to hire someone like that. Not. The more corrupt the system, the more desirable are people who were on the inside. No, no, such people will be even more valuable now.

Posted by: AmishDude at May 19, 2013 01:35 PM (xSegX)

179 Drudge is doing the juxtaposition I see.

And right below the headline, with Obama looking smug at Morehouse, is a link to an article "White House Aide Calls Criticism of Obama 'Offensive'...".

Once again: it's President We Are The Champions / Hector.

Posted by: boulder t'hobo at May 19, 2013 01:35 PM (QTHTd)

180

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 05:32 PM (niZvt)


fapping to the butterface in the gaming thread

Posted by: The Dude at May 19, 2013 01:36 PM (vJdyz)

181 Okay- I'm seriously winded here.  Somebody else will have to carry on from here, I'm gonna take a break.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:36 PM (pxDth)

182 Hey, no big deal on the IRS thing.  Seriously, you guys--if it were really a problem we would have gotten someone other than David Pfeiffer delivering the administration's position.  I mean on an NFL QB depth chart, Pfeiffer would at least be the guy keeping the cord from getting tangled on Tim Tebow's headset.

Those guys just deliberately insulted the intelligence of every single citizen.  And while some of us might deserve it, I am quite pissed.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 19, 2013 01:37 PM (IsF93)

183 A cob-log needs to post an IRS scandal thread to see if we can make the troll jump.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:37 PM (MMC8r)

184 175 Anybody know of a compiled list of TFG scandals? Need some more material for Subversive Fun 101.....Doug Ross @ Journal. Top right hand is Obamas historic firsts. Good list!!1!

Posted by: t-dubyah-d at May 19, 2013 01:37 PM (u6lBN)

185

I watched Detropia on Detroit's PBS station, it'll be on again at midnight for anyone in the area.

 

Good documentary. The film makers just shut up, let people talk and showed occasional facts about Detroit, my favourite third world city where my mother was born and raised, in a nice little house that later turned into a crack den and was eventually torn down after the family fled the city in the 80's.

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at May 19, 2013 01:37 PM (AC0lD)

186 Okay- I'm seriously winded here. Somebody else will have to carry on from here, I'm gonna take a break. Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 05:36 PM (pxDth) -------------------------------------------------------- Why are you Czeching out?

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:37 PM (jucos)

187 So that's how straight Indians in Manitoba got AIDS.
Asshole.

Posted by: andycanuck at May 19, 2013 01:38 PM (mGBy8)

188 andycanuck, are you in MB? Just asking. Former MB resident here.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:39 PM (K+I6z)

189 The much awaited thread in which Forrest Gump gives his son AIDS. I give it two arugula pizzas out of four. Don't ever touch my stash again CBD.

Posted by: AOSHQ resident conservative art critic at May 19, 2013 01:39 PM (Cf+1J)

190 Pinched nerve in my neck won't let me sit at the keyboard too long.  I'm just gonna watch the baseball game and lurk a little.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:39 PM (pxDth)

191 186 Really. I heard Pfeiffer on the radio and his machine gun delivery and rote repetition made him sound either retarded or high.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 01:39 PM (MMC8r)

192 So that's how straight Indians in Manitoba got AIDS.
Asshole.

Yeah, that is how straight men get AIDS. . .

Posted by: boulder t'hobo at May 19, 2013 01:40 PM (QTHTd)

193 CBD, Is there going to be a Game of Thrones thread?
I'm the GoT spread!

Posted by: princess sandra fluke of cooter mountain at May 19, 2013 01:40 PM (mGBy8)

194 Weather Channel airing live coverage of a forming tornado in Arcadia, OK. You Okies stay safe.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 01:40 PM (piMMO)

195 Well, that and the heroin, abuse of which does sometimes happen at the Rez

Posted by: boulder t'hobo at May 19, 2013 01:40 PM (QTHTd)

196 Really. I heard Pfeiffer on the radio and his machine gun delivery and rote repetition made him sound either retarded or high. Can't it be both?

Posted by: AmishDude at May 19, 2013 01:40 PM (xSegX)

197 Besides, it's Dante Bichette bobblehead day at Coors Field.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at May 19, 2013 01:41 PM (pxDth)

198 Seriously, you guys, a major boner. Not in a Russian winter. Posted by: boulder t'hobo at May 19, 2013 05:20 PM (QTHTd) They snap right off!

Posted by: Waldo Truth at May 19, 2013 01:42 PM (w+oEo)

199 I thought Huma was secretly on Hillary's staff?

Posted by: Waldo Truth at May 19, 2013 01:43 PM (w+oEo)

200

Here's what I'm wondering.

 

How does any conservative American ever feel that they are not possibly being targeted in any future dealing with the IRS?

Posted by: Stateless Infidel at May 19, 2013 01:43 PM (AC0lD)

201 Is Brian Dennehy reprising his role as the Thai tranny hooker with the lace wig and the heart of gold!

Posted by: runningrnnningrn at May 19, 2013 01:43 PM (PLOz8)

202 I thought Huma was secretly on Hillary's staff? Posted by: Waldo Truth at May 19, 2013 05:43 PM (w+oEo) Shouldn't you add "makeshift" somewhere in that sentence?

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:44 PM (K+I6z)

203 There are two events in life that form a conservative POV. One is running a small to medium size business. The other is having an infant daughter. Figure the employers in this country that fit one of those two parameters. Ideological Revenue Service current employees have seen their future job market squeezed tighter then Peter Norths junk in a Wicked Weasel thong.

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 01:46 PM (U2UQk)

204 OK, this made me LOL. "Smack My Bitch Up" performed by the Beatles http://tinyurl.com/ajrksym /hat tip Instapundit

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 01:46 PM (sdi6R)

205 It is discovered that Forrest's father was a black Kenyan. The media and dem's fawn. Forrest runs to DC and becomes president. Even though the economy tanks, jobs cannot be found, deficit skyrockets, and a truckload of scandals, the Dems and media still love Forrest.

Posted by: Mekan at May 19, 2013 01:48 PM (zG16+)

206 "Is Brian Dennehy reprising his role as the Thai tranny hooker with the lace wig and the heart of gold!"

Covered a lot of AoS memes in one short sentence, well done.

Posted by: lowandslow at May 19, 2013 01:48 PM (Fz2C7)

207 Jim Cantore is reporting from about 50 yrds from the tornado in OK. They've got a chopper in the air videoing it. Amazing

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 01:48 PM (piMMO)

208 Watching a tornado develop on the Weather Channel.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:49 PM (K+I6z)

209 WWW.tofighthiv.org/goto/jez

Posted by: JEZ at May 19, 2013 01:49 PM (pdyba)

210 How does any conservative American ever feel that they are not possibly being targeted in any future dealing with the IRS? Posted by: Stateless Infidel at May 19, 2013 05:43 PM (AC0lD) ----------------------------------------------------------- They won't. That is the point. Nothing is going to happen to anyone involved in this. The republic is dead.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 01:49 PM (jucos)

211 Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:38 Strong work! You sir, are a great American!

Posted by: runningrn channeling her inner Hannity at May 19, 2013 01:49 PM (PLOz8)

212 No, I lurk, I'm in west-end Toronto.

Posted by: princess sandra fluke of cooter mountain at May 19, 2013 01:50 PM (mGBy8)

213 No, I lurk, I'm in west-end Toronto. Posted by: princess sandra fluke of cooter mountain at May 19, 2013 05:50 PM (mGBy You poor thing.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:51 PM (K+I6z)

214 212 Jim Cantore is reporting from about 50 yrds from the tornado in OK. They've got a chopper in the air videoing it. Amazing Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 05:48 PM (piMMO) The Joint Chiefs were recommending that the USAF Reserve 53rd Weather Recon Squadron be paid according to the size of their balls. Came to realize it would be unsustainable within two years.

Posted by: RWC at May 19, 2013 01:52 PM (Wl/Ht)

215 Bruins win! 5-2

Posted by: RightOne40 at May 19, 2013 01:53 PM (qMdwv)

216 runningrnnningrn, you left out machine parts. 

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 01:53 PM (zxYv0)

217 OK, this made me LOL. "Smack My Bitch Up" performed by the Beatles http://tinyurl.com/ajrksym /hat tip Instapundit Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 05:46 PM (sdi6R) If only that pearl of wisdom had been applied to Yoko Ono...

Posted by: The Political Hat at May 19, 2013 01:53 PM (Vk2pI)

218 The Joint Chiefs were recommending that the USAF Reserve 53rd Weather Recon Squadron be paid according to the size of their balls. Came to realize it would be unsustainable within two years. *** I'd love to fly into the core of a (small) hurricane.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 01:54 PM (piMMO)

219 TPH, did you see the cosplay pic The Dude put up in previous thread?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 01:54 PM (zxYv0)

220 I hope I never see Jim Cantore in front of my house.

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 01:54 PM (sdi6R)

221 The "Republic" has been dead since 1865.

Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 01:54 PM (53z96)

222 That OK tornado is a biggie.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:54 PM (K+I6z)

223 Correction: That tornado is huge.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:55 PM (K+I6z)

224 203 I thought Huma was secretly on Hillary's staff? Posted by: Waldo Truth at May 19, 2013 05:43 PM (w+oEo) Speaking of snap-on tools...

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:57 PM (niZvt)

225 Lt Dan signs Forrest up to run as the Republican Candidate. He loses the primary to Romney. The Idiot continues to run for President. Forrest retires from politics.

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 01:57 PM (MhA4j)

226 TPH, did you see the cosplay pic The Dude put up in previous thread? Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 05:54 PM (zxYv0) Yup. Some of the others of her were better... but less "safe for work"

Posted by: 政治的な帽子 at May 19, 2013 01:57 PM (Vk2pI)

227 228 Correction: That tornado is huge. Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 05:55 PM (K+I6z) That's what she said.

Posted by: CoolCzech at May 19, 2013 01:58 PM (niZvt)

228 I'd love to fly into the core of a (small) hurricane. Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 05:54 PM (piMMO) Just turned it on. Yeah, this isn't a small one. Damn.

Posted by: RWC at May 19, 2013 01:58 PM (Wl/Ht)

229 The tornado near Wellston, OK could be as high as an EF4. It's a wedge tornado, which is very dangerous.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 01:59 PM (K+I6z)

230 The "Republic" has been dead since 1865. Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 05:54 PM *** The International Bankers have been at the helm ever since.

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 01:59 PM (MhA4j)

231 #149 yes I wish there would be more attention to the election rigging aspects of the IRS suppression. Should be able to make some back of envelope guesses at how much funding was lost and thus how many votes. Remember how the election of 2000 was thrown by a couple of cop cars near the polls making millions of blacks afraid to vote!

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at May 19, 2013 02:00 PM (NPVZD)

232

Momma  Gump  rises  from  the  dead  and  becomes  Zombie  Mary  Todd  Lincoln.  Sally  Field  says  she  will  gladly  join  cast!

Posted by: FG 2: Script Tweak at May 19, 2013 02:00 PM (utKTB)

233 That Forrest Gump thing is very funny, CBD, nice work!  I may be the only person in the developed world who has never seen that movie.  It looked really stupid.


Posted by: Peaches at May 19, 2013 02:00 PM (8lmkt)

234 227 That OK tornado is a biggie. Yup that's the kind we get out here In Oklahoma and Texas and Kansas

Posted by: Extremely grumpy momma bear at May 19, 2013 02:00 PM (lxnDI)

235 Well, that's creative.

Posted by: chemjeff at May 19, 2013 02:00 PM (BBWjt)

236 That OK tornado is a biggie. *** It started out as a few small vortexes rotating around each other, then they combined and it's been growing ever since.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:00 PM (piMMO)

237

WeÂ’re not political,Â’Â’ said one determinations staffer in khakis as he left work late Tuesday afternoon. “We people on the local level are doing what we are supposed to do. . . . ThatÂ’s why there are so many people here who are flustered. Everything comes from the top. We donÂ’t have any authority to make those decisions without someone signing off on them. There has to be a directive.”

 

 

The staff member, who spoke on the condition of anonymity for fear of losing his job, said that the determinations unit is competent and without bias, that it grouped together conservative applications “for consistencyÂ’s sake” — so one application did not sail through while a similar one was held up in review. This consistency is paramount in the review of all applications, according to Ronald Ran, an estate-tax lawyer who worked for 37 years in the IRSÂ’s

Posted by: thunderb at May 19, 2013 02:02 PM (nH8jP)

238 Everything comes from the top.We don’t have any authority to make those decisions without someone signing off on them. There has to be a directive.”

Posted by: thunderb at May 19, 2013 02:02 PM (nH8jP)

239 The International Bankers have been at the helm ever since.

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 05:59 PM (MhA4j)


I was serious.  The "Republic" was replaced with an oligarchy of controlling power interests, largely in the NE.  

Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 02:02 PM (53z96)

240 Forrest Gump III : The Gumpening Prologue: A spunky young AIDS virus crosses the blood-brain barrier of Forrest Gump's meninges into his brain. Once in Gump's visual cortex, we can see what Forrest sees. We see that Forrest is chasing the bird feather at the end of Forrest Gump II. On the bird feather, an adventurous Bird Flu Virus leaps off the feather to enter Gump's nose and through a thrilling CGI journey winds up in one of Forrest's retarded brain cells along with the spunky AIDS virus. The adventurous Bird Flu Virus and spunky AIDS virus have a romantic menage a trois with some of Forrest's retard genes. And a new highly contagious airborne virus- The Forrest Gump virus- is born. The Gumpening has begun. 1) As Forrest Gump lies dying, he coughs the Forrest Gump virus all over the hospital personnel. 2) The new FGV plague converts everyone who catches it into a dying, drooling retard who constantly runs around waving his/her arms, humping pumpkins and tom cats, and voting for Barack Obama. 3) Soon the entire East Coast is covered by a huge mass of infected retards running aimlessly about. 4) FADE OUT into the beginning of the movie World War Z. FIN

Posted by: Staff at May 19, 2013 02:04 PM (ZR4Xh)

241 It started out as a few small vortexes rotating around each other, then they combined and it's been growing ever since. Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 06:00 PM (piMMO) When I was a kid there was an EF4 in Edmonton, Alberta, and it was the strongest tornado to ever occur that far north. It was also multiple vortexes that formed into a biggie. It actually picked itself up and went over my house.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:05 PM (K+I6z)

242 I'm a Black Man! A Black Man! A Black Man!

Posted by: Barry de Black Man! at May 19, 2013 02:05 PM (w+oEo)

243 I was serious. **** I'm serious too. Now what we have is an amalgamation of criminal gangs using the public credit as their operating capital.

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 02:06 PM (MhA4j)

244 I'm a Black Man! A Black Man! A Black Man! Half black. And half a man.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 02:07 PM (MMC8r)

245 Well, the republic is well and truly dead now. It might have been dead as early as 1865, but I now know it is dead for sure. I no longer trust the institutions of the government. What happened to my country?

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 02:07 PM (jucos)

246 .....golf clap..... well done. how is it that you don't make the big bucks writing in hollyweird?

Posted by: sally at May 19, 2013 02:07 PM (s1Np6)

247 When I was a kid there was an EF4 in Edmonton, Alberta, and it was the strongest tornado to ever occur that far north. It was also multiple vortexes that formed into a biggie. It actually picked itself up and went over my house. *** Here in Florida we rarely get anything over about an EF2 but about 15 years ago there was a huge outbreak in the Orlando area and there was either an F4 or F5. My friend, a state trooper, took a photo of a refrigerator that was standing upright in the middle of the road. The door had been ripped off, yet the food was all still standing up perfectly in the fridge. Odd, odd beasts, they.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:08 PM (piMMO)

248 I'm a Black Man! A Black Man! A Black Man!

Posted by: Barry de Black Man! at May 19, 2013 06:05 PM (w+oEo)


I thought the correct term was half-rican american . . . I can't keep up with this shit, I don't really even try.

Posted by: Peaches at May 19, 2013 02:08 PM (8lmkt)

249 And half a man. Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 06:07 PM (MMC8r) ------------------------------------------------------- I object. It assumes facts not in evidence.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 02:09 PM (jucos)

250 KFOR is saying this thing is a mile wide. The Tuscaloosa tornado was that big.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:09 PM (K+I6z)

251 If anyone is a weather geek, americanwx.com is weather geekdom. I'm watching reports from locals in the midwest.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:12 PM (K+I6z)

252 What do Lindsay Lohan,Leonardo DiCaprio, Katherine Heigl, Robert Pattison, and Ace all have in common? http://goo.gl/4eTPb

Posted by: Barry de Black Man! at May 19, 2013 02:12 PM (w+oEo)

253 Oh, and if you guessed boobs, you're wrong.

Posted by: Barry de Black Man! at May 19, 2013 02:13 PM (w+oEo)

254 I hope wheatie is safe. Soona too.

Posted by: Ronster at May 19, 2013 02:14 PM (sa3Ro)

255 Quitting is easy. Just do it. Cold turkey. No gum or patches or e-cigs. They just prolong the angst that you put yourself through when trying to quit. Just do it. It has been almost 18 months for me.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 02:16 PM (jucos)

256 I thought they said quitting is easy -- not starting up again is the hard part.

Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 02:17 PM (w+oEo)

257 I'm a Black Man! A Black Man! A Black Man!

And I suddenly have a modified version of the Batman TV series theme playing in my mind.  Thanks a lot.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 02:17 PM (d0bTF)

258 Can you be sucked up out of a basement?

Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 02:18 PM (w+oEo)

259 Can you be sucked up out of a basement?

Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 06:18 PM (w+oEo)

How much you got?

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at May 19, 2013 02:19 PM (O6Tmi)

260 I thought they said quitting is easy -- not starting up again is the hard part.

This is why I never quit.  I'm not really a smoker-smoker, I am simply failure-averse.

Posted by: Peaches at May 19, 2013 02:19 PM (8lmkt)

261 The International Bankers have been at the helm ever since. Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 05:59 PM (MhA4j) I was serious. The "Republic" was replaced with an oligarchy of controlling power interests, largely in the NE. Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 06:02 PM (53z96) Good! They're not onto us yet...

Posted by: The Stonecutters at May 19, 2013 02:20 PM (Vk2pI)

262 Can you be sucked up out of a basement? Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 06:18 PM (w+oEo) ----------------------------------------------------------- I don't know. I've been blown in a basement before.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 02:20 PM (jucos)

263 I'm serious too. Now what we have is an amalgamation of criminal gangs using the public credit as their operating capital.

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 06:06 PM (MhA4j)



That is a culmination of the events started in 1965 by the arch criminal from Texas, LBJ.

Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 02:20 PM (53z96)

264 okay, the "cache a small Czech" was good


'cache' is a French word, you guys.

Posted by: Lanny the poker man at May 19, 2013 02:20 PM (omBWL)

265 Can you be sucked up out of a basement? Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 06:18 PM (w+oEo) ----------------------------------------------------------- I don't know. I've been blown in a basement before. Posted by: Truck Monkey at May 19, 2013 06:20 PM (jucos) *Sobs*

Posted by: 26 year old "child" in Mommy's basement enjoying funemployment at May 19, 2013 02:21 PM (Vk2pI)

266 256 If anyone is a weather geek, americanwx.com is weather geekdom. I'm watching reports from locals in the midwest. Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 06:12 PM (K+I6z) Wow, that's a great link. Bookmarked.

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 02:23 PM (sdi6R)

267 Can you be sucked up out of a basement? Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 06:18 PM An acquaintance disappeared in the Jarrel tornado along with his house and the slab it was sitting on and the adjacent streets pavement. In fact, there was about 18 inches of soil missing from where those houses sat.

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 02:23 PM (MhA4j)

268 Wow, that's a great link. Bookmarked. Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 06:23 PM (sdi6R) If they get overrun with activity (ie. Sandy last year) they'll restrict access to members, so it doesn't hurt to join. I'm a member and I don't post very often.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:25 PM (K+I6z)

269 That is a culmination of the events started in 1965 by the arch criminal from Texas, LBJ. Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 06:20 PM **** I'm glad you brought him up. My father worked for him but after Kennedy it changed. My Dad quit and we went back to the ranch once to pick up some of his things. I was seven and asked why we did not go to Stonewall any more and his answer was "Spooks son."

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 02:26 PM (MhA4j)

270  I like the cut of your jib and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.


I am MWR, and I approve of this evisceration of that trite piece of    regressive garbage known as "Forrest Gump." 


The only good thing about FG (besides a few catchy lines) was the soundtrack.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/b][/i][/u] at May 19, 2013 02:27 PM (CA2NO)

271 Can you be sucked up out of a basement? *** I would suppose so. If the house is wiped away you might be exposed.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:28 PM (piMMO)

272 Best. Sequel. Ever.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Trying the Wild Turkey folks speak of at May 19, 2013 02:28 PM (6rcHp)

273 Ping pong-sized hail in Norman, OK. Baseballs reported in KS.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:29 PM (K+I6z)

274 Who's directing? I recommend the Coen brothers. Aranofky is good, but he wouldn't give it that edgy humorous punch that makes this work.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Trying the Wild Turkey folks speak of at May 19, 2013 02:30 PM (6rcHp)

275 A month ago Bexar county (San Antonio, TX) was all crystal clear in Google Earth. All blurred now. Try it on your version and see. National security issue?

Posted by: The littl shyning man at May 19, 2013 02:31 PM (PH+2B)

276 The big tornado that hit a few days ago.... they showed a photo of a house where the roof and several walls were missing. You could look straight down into the house and the clothes were still hanging in the closet and the food was still in the kitchen pantry.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:31 PM (piMMO)

277 Haley Joel is a druggy? Say it ain't so.

Posted by: Tuna at May 19, 2013 02:31 PM (M/TDA)

278 Funny we are talking about basements here today.  Went to Charlotte yesterday with wifey to meet her brother who came out from Texas.


We were discussing TX, NC, and SC and the fact that few homes around here had basements.  We were pondering the reasons why there were a lot up North but very few down South.  My theory was that land in the South was much cheaper, therefore lot size was much bigger, therefore it was cheaper to build out rather than up and down.

Posted by: Vic at May 19, 2013 02:33 PM (53z96)

279 Ping pong-sized hail in Norman, OK. Baseballs reported in KS. Oh, my- mobilize all Marines around DC! I'll need an umbrella if the remnants of that storm make it here...

Posted by: Barky McDouche at May 19, 2013 02:33 PM (FcR7P)

280 (San Antonio, TX) was all crystal clear in Google Earth. All blurred now. **** Smoke from Mexico. http://www.accuweather.com/en/weather-news/smoke-to-affect-texas-louisian/12700119

Posted by: Dept. Of Acuracy at May 19, 2013 02:34 PM (MhA4j)

281 Ping pong-sized hail in Norman, OK. Baseballs reported in KS. Oh, my- mobilize all Marines around DC! I'll need an umbrella if the remnants of that storm make it here... Posted by: Barky McDouche at May 19, 2013 06:33 PM (FcR7P) Grow a pair, honey.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:34 PM (K+I6z)

282 Democrats and Organized Crime have been together since long before LBJ.

Posted by: JFK at May 19, 2013 02:38 PM (4Qfnw)

283 Fun from Wiki: Osment follows a mostly meat-free diet, though he does eat chicken and fish. Meat-free, except for the meat. Osment pleaded no contest to one count each of misdemeanor driving under the influence of alcohol and misdemeanor drug possession, on October 19, 2006. I'm betting Hollywood has more than one case of a vegan with a coke habit who has no sense of the irony.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 02:38 PM (MMC8r)

284 Oh, my- mobilize all Marines around DC! I'll need an umbrella if the remnants of that storm make it here...

Posted by: Barky McDouche at May 19, 2013 06:33 PM (FcR7P)

Oh, that the rains would roll off of you like the hidden truths of your origins or your current crapweaselry, eh?  It's water, Francis, deal with it.

Posted by: Peaches at May 19, 2013 02:39 PM (8lmkt)

285 To be fair, alcohol and drugs are mostly meat-free.

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 02:40 PM (FcR7P)

286 Peaches, may I provide bacon for you and treats for those whole rule over you?

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:41 PM (K+I6z)

287 *Replace whole with who in 291*

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:41 PM (K+I6z)

288 That's a lot of bacon.

Posted by: Ronster at May 19, 2013 02:45 PM (sa3Ro)

289 Damn. Now the Iowans are on alert.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:46 PM (piMMO)

290 Heck, Minnesotans are on alert.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:47 PM (K+I6z)

291 Would it be wrong to imagine a rain of bacon covering the White House?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 02:49 PM (d0bTF)

292 Damn. Now the Iowans are on alert. *Yawn*, nap time. Wake me if Chicago needs anything.

Posted by: Barky McDouche at May 19, 2013 02:49 PM (FcR7P)

293 There was a sequel to the book Forrest Gump:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gump_and_Co.

Forrest Gump was intended to depict people with traditional American
values as "Retarded."  When the producers of the film were asked why they
produced such a "Conservative" film, they denied that was their intention.

After finding out that audiences were cheering the scene where Forrest Gump
jumped across the table and kicked the crap out of the SDS scumbag who
slapped Jenny, Rush Limbaugh said:  "Face it, you produced a conservative
movie!"


Posted by: Leonard Jones at May 19, 2013 02:50 PM (VMLYI)

294 Damn spider just tried to jump on me. Hate that. Jumped down from the ceiling right on to my keyboard. Harmless little bastard, but I just hate, hate, hate that.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 02:50 PM (ZPrif)

295 Robert found this video, it should distract sufficiently for the Moron Horde.  And hypnotize probably.

Raquel Welch - Space Girl Dance.
http://youtu.be/pgqTS3XcAuI

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 02:51 PM (d0bTF)

296 Think I saw an alert for Wisconsin too. That must be an enormous line of storms.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 02:52 PM (lVb7s)

297 All spiders (snakes too) are considered harmful until dead.

Posted by: Ronster at May 19, 2013 02:53 PM (sa3Ro)

298 Haley Joel is a druggy? Say it ain't so.


I see purple people, Man!

Posted by: Haley Joel Osment at May 19, 2013 02:53 PM (z9HTb)

299 Think I saw an alert for Wisconsin too. That must be an enormous line of storms. *** Four states now on alert: IA, KS, OK, and WI

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:53 PM (piMMO)

300 Hoo?

Posted by: Haley Joel Owlet at May 19, 2013 02:54 PM (utKTB)

301 He rolled his car coming down a steep street. He was under the influence of alcohol and had some mj on him. It was treated more seriously because there were injuries - thought I think only to himself. Anyway, that was what? 7 years ago?

Posted by: Waldo at May 19, 2013 02:55 PM (w+oEo)

302 On his way north he stops into a Chicago bath house, thinking it would be where he can get a bath. He's approached below the waist by what he doesn't know is the future president of the United States. Feel free to include into the story.

Posted by: Up With People at May 19, 2013 02:55 PM (krveP)

303 I see purple people, Man! *** I once did a search for "purple people eater" and porn came up. Yep. Purple people eater porn.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:55 PM (piMMO)

304 That is a serious line of storms just now hitting the western border of MO.  About half way across Iowa.  And hitting Minneapolis.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 02:55 PM (d0bTF)

305 Why does baseball allow so many empty seats behind home plate? Looks horrible on TV. Put some kids there. Let a local kids sports team, or boy scout/gir scout troop, have those seats. Rotate in new groups. Instead they sell them to the rich guy who only show 30% of the time. Simple presentation trick. Don't show empty seats on TV if you don't have to. Normally only 20 or so seats behind homeplate are visible. Fill it with kids or charity groups who are excited to be there.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 02:55 PM (ZPrif)

306 I once did a search for _____________ and porn came up.

Posted by: garrett at May 19, 2013 02:56 PM (PTdRK)

307

Been getting some rain in central MN. 

Glad to see it.  The drought was not good. 

Doppler radar shows a possible tornado along the MN-WI border. 

Posted by: rd at May 19, 2013 02:56 PM (D+lxs)

308 I read somewhere that Raquel Welch really took off as a sex symbol after breast enlargement.Didn't think they did it that long ago but if you see very early pictures of her she does seem to have way smaller breasts.

Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 02:57 PM (9XBK2)

309 *Replace whole with who in 291*


I'll stick to "54 40' or fight!", thank you.

Posted by: James Knox Polk at May 19, 2013 02:57 PM (z9HTb)

310 I once did a search for _____________ and porn came up. *** Touche'

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 02:57 PM (piMMO)

311   Raquel Welch - Space Girl Dance. http://youtu.be/pgqTS3XcAuI 

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 06:51 PM (d0bTF)

Those guys are wearing goofy hats.  

Posted by: ConservativeMonster at May 19, 2013 02:59 PM (A4irB)

312 Brian Dennehy as the HIV virus and as a mutant sentient shrimp with the power to make chocolate out of coal? Brian is ready to stretch.

Posted by: eman at May 19, 2013 02:59 PM (cQ4xo)

313 Russians launch a bunch of mice and lizards into space.  Not all survived.  Well now we know what happened to some dissidents da?

http://tinyurl.com/azud6rn

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 02:59 PM (d0bTF)

314 I once did a search for porn and ended up here!!11!???

Posted by: t-dubyah-d at May 19, 2013 02:59 PM (u6lBN)

315 Why does baseball allow so many empty seats behind home plate? Looks horrible on TV. Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 06:55 PM (ZPrif) Last I checked, at Nationals Park the-right-behind-home-plate tickets were $360 each plus service charges. You got an inside eating/drinking area, an inside buffet, and ballpark eats included in your ticket. Sodas, certain beer, and house wine included.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 02:59 PM (K+I6z)

316 wow, there are some angry red blobs headed my way

Posted by: chemjeff at May 19, 2013 03:00 PM (BBWjt)

317 Conservative Monster, read The Dude's post or the Neverwinter forums if you can stand the screaming.  But some people seriously ganked the diamonds for goodies market.

And you actually paid attention to what the guy's were wearing?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:02 PM (d0bTF)

318 Russians launch a bunch of mice and lizards into space. Not all survived. Well now we know what happened to some dissidents da? http://tinyurl.com/azud6rn Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 06:59 PM (d0bTF) Russians have a knack for killing living things via its space program.

Posted by: The Political Hat at May 19, 2013 03:02 PM (Vk2pI)

319 I know Huckabee isn't terribly popular around these parts yet, if you missed it last night, catch the replay this evening. The story of harassment told by Catherine Engelbrecht, founder of True the Vote, is chilling.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 03:02 PM (piMMO)

320 It's just dumb for baseball to do that. Penny-wise, pound foolish. You can give the rich folks great seats just out of camera range. Give em all the concierge service they want. The problem with the rich guy season tickets -- they often don't show up. Empty seats on TV make the game look unimportant. Some kids or a local charity in those prime 20 seats would look great on TV. This is like TV 101. The home plate seats are the main seats that are seen on TV. Put some butts in those seats.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:04 PM (ZPrif)

321 Last I checked, at Nationals Park the-right-behind-home-plate tickets were $360 each plus service charges. You got an inside eating/drinking area, an inside buffet, and ballpark eats included in your ticket. Sodas, certain beer, and house wine included. *** As with the Oscars, they could have some folks standing by to fill their seats when they go to the clubhouse.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 03:04 PM (piMMO)

322 Looks like that line of storms hits Eastern MO around midnight. Maybe I should take a nap, 'cause I won't be sleeping once the thunder starts.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 03:05 PM (lVb7s)

323 Korolev never left the ground and the Soviet system killed him.  Soyuz 1 and then the three Cosmonauts who died of asphyxiation because their hatch did not seal.  Then the rocket that exploded on the pad after the first stage failed to ignite and they forgot the second stage timer was still going.. and as people started to emerge those motors did fire.  Yeah a pretty brutal and lethal record that space program.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:06 PM (d0bTF)

324 What do you do with the charity kids when the ticket holder shows up in the second inning?  You've broken the contract you made with them when they purchased the tickets.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™, Crankypants Extraordinaire at May 19, 2013 03:06 PM (hO8IJ)

325 Batten down the hatches now Polliwogette.  Then catch a nap.  Really don't want you out in the dark chasing after stuff.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:07 PM (d0bTF)

326 Odd, odd beasts, they.

 

 

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 06:08 PM (piMMO)

 

 

Well... sure pardner.... but a Lasso goes a long way to harnesin the beasty...

Posted by: Pecos Bill at May 19, 2013 03:09 PM (lZBBB)

327 good luck Polliwogette

Posted by: chemjeff at May 19, 2013 03:09 PM (BBWjt)

328 Polliwogette, prayers for you!

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 03:10 PM (K+I6z)

329 Don't sell those seats. Reserve them as charity/kids seats. Don't have those on-camera seats be expensive season ticket seats. You can still have great rich guy seats just out of range a littler higher or a little to the left or right. Most MLB games I see, even the ones with decent attendance, have like half the on-camera seats empty. Or more.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:11 PM (ZPrif)

330 Now, now. Keep it gay!

Posted by: Gary Beach at May 19, 2013 03:11 PM (5J56L)

331 Nothing loose outside anymore, advantage of getting ready to move. Might make sure I'm wearing something I don't mind being seen by the neighbors in, just in case.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 03:11 PM (lVb7s)

332 Looks like that line of storms hits Eastern MO around midnight. Maybe I should take a nap, 'cause I won't be sleeping once the thunder starts. *** hunker down dear, and stay safe.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 03:11 PM (piMMO)

333 What does a billionaire decide to get for his museum?  If you are Paul Allen, a V-2 rocket.
http://tinyurl.com/b5xtwb7

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:11 PM (d0bTF)

334

What do you do with the charity kids when the ticket holder shows up in the second inning? You've broken the contract you made with them when they purchased the tickets.

 

That's when you snatch the little props from the seats and send them packing.

Posted by: Ronster at May 19, 2013 03:12 PM (sa3Ro)

335 Jeans and long sleeves in case things get really debris filled.  Please be safe.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:12 PM (d0bTF)

336 323 Russians have a knack for killing living things via its space program. Posted by: The Political Hat at May 19, 2013 07:02 PM (Vk2pI) Word.

Posted by: Laika at May 19, 2013 03:13 PM (sdi6R)

337 Attach a chair to those cable cameras that fly over the field. Now you've got a Powerball winner's seat.

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 03:13 PM (FcR7P)

338 Thanks for the good wishes, but I didn't mean to worry people. I've just always had a *thing* about thunderstorms and don't sleep well when they're happening.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 03:13 PM (lVb7s)

339 I guess in Cali, if you are a boy feeling pretty enough to be a girl, you can shower with them. STATE ORDERING GIRLS' LOCKER ROOMS OPEN TO BOYS Homosexual former teacher pushes bill through state assembly

Posted by: Up With People at May 19, 2013 03:13 PM (krveP)

340 It's only 80 home games a year. In a big city that should be easy to fill. If I were baseball I'd give it to local Little League teams. They'd be ecstatic. All decked in home team gear. Parents would splurge. Great PR. Great look on TV.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:13 PM (ZPrif)

341 342 Attach a chair to those cable cameras that fly over the field. Now you've got a Powerball winner's seat.

Posted by: t-bird at May 19, 2013 07:13 PM (FcR7P)



... except when there's a pop fly

Posted by: chemjeff at May 19, 2013 03:14 PM (BBWjt)

342 I'm watching OK TV, thanks to I lurk's link. http://www.news9.com/category/258217/weather-control-center#!/central/

Posted by: Laika at May 19, 2013 03:14 PM (sdi6R)

343 I'm a white man.

You're impressed, right?

Posted by: Craig Poe at May 19, 2013 03:15 PM (BVkEs)

344 File this under - What could go wrong?

USAF replacing flight manuals with iPads
http://tinyurl.com/a6cdego

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:15 PM (d0bTF)

345 Off, space dog sock. That's a good girl.

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 03:15 PM (sdi6R)

346 Thanks for the good wishes, but I didn't mean to worry people. I've just always had a *thing* about thunderstorms and don't sleep well when they're happening. *** well, you've had quite the experience, so nervousness is understandable.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 03:15 PM (piMMO)

347 Who cares about a damn movie when Choom Boy has just admitted that he's a black man?

What the stupid shit didn't acknowledge is that he would be living in a cardboard box, a jail cell or the back seat of a car parked behind the Mickey D's where he's flipping burgers if he wasn't black.

The ultimate success of affirmative action: President Historic First©.

Evey time the treasonous fuckweasel yammers about "responsibility," I want to vomit.

Posted by: MrScribbler at May 19, 2013 03:17 PM (mHrip)

348 In other weather news, SolarHam.com is reporting an inbound CME:

"The ACE spacecraft is detecting a solar wind increase to near 500km/s.  This signals the passage of an interplanetary shock past the ACE spacecraft.  The CME plasma cloud should sweep past Earth in the next 30 minutes."

And they just updated with:

"The magnetometer in Boulder, CO is now detecting a geomagnetic sudden impulse at 23:11 UTC."

Posted by: Country Singer at May 19, 2013 03:17 PM (cnmE6)

349 Homosexual former teacher pushes bill through state assembly Stop that! I'm not an exhibitionist!

Posted by: Bill at May 19, 2013 03:19 PM (sdi6R)

350 STATE ORDERING GIRLS' LOCKER ROOMS OPEN TO BOYS Because only special people have rights.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 03:21 PM (MMC8r)

351 Another fucked up child star,Edward Furlong(John Connor in Terminator 2) ,arrested on suspicion of violating a restraining order chapter in his sad saga.

Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 03:21 PM (9XBK2)

352 wow this thread is still up? I'm posting so that a new thread will go up.

Posted by: elizabethe loves her some karaoke at May 19, 2013 03:22 PM (qPCAa)

353 Huge, ugly, tornado northeast of OKC.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 03:22 PM (K+I6z)

354 Look forward to them explaining that to the devout muslim family whose daughter now has to share the bathroom with magical elf boy.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:22 PM (ZPrif)

355 And Neverwinter is still off-line.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:23 PM (d0bTF)

356 357 wow this thread is still up? I'm posting so that a new thread will go up.

Posted by: elizabethe loves her some karaoke at May 19, 2013 07:22 PM (qPCAa)


Good Strategery.

Posted by: Craig Poe at May 19, 2013 03:23 PM (BVkEs)

357 Last I checked, at Nationals Park the-right-behind-home-plate tickets were $360 each plus service charges. You got an inside eating/drinking area, an inside buffet, and ballpark eats included in your ticket. Sodas, certain beer, and house wine included. Last I checked, someone who could name those prices without one single obscenity is part of the problem. You are disconnected from the reality of the people who pay for your indifference.

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 03:24 PM (U2UQk)

358 Good Strategery. Posted by: Craig Poe at May 19, 2013 07:23 PM (BVkEs) thanks, though it didn't seem to work. Where's Merovign?

Posted by: elizabethe loves her some karaoke at May 19, 2013 03:24 PM (qPCAa)

359 Flatbush Joe, that would probably bring the program to a screeching and bloody halt.  Sacred honor compels the father to kill his daughter and all who even gazed at her ankle.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:24 PM (d0bTF)

360 STATE ORDERING GIRLS' LOCKER ROOMS OPEN TO BOYS
Homosexual former teacher pushes bill through state assembly

yet another good reason for me not to have an assault weapon . . .

Posted by: Peaches at May 19, 2013 03:24 PM (8lmkt)

361 Only thing longer than the weekend late afternoon threads are the overnight threads. The relaxing afternoon weekend threads. RAWT.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:25 PM (ZPrif)

362 Hi Anna! how are you? what is neverwinter? some kind of game, I gather? Is that why you have abandoned us lately?

Posted by: elizabethe loves her some karaoke at May 19, 2013 03:25 PM (qPCAa)

363 NDH, I got to thinking after or Twitter exchange and realized that the other tornado was in May. So it's been almost exactly 5 years. What was funniest is that we didn't even know it *was* actually a tornado (it passed at an angle behind our house and over a couple blocks) until power and cell coverage returned and we got the message my b-i-l left saying there'd been a tornado that ripped railcars off the tracks and were we okay.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 03:25 PM (lVb7s)

364 Remember, girls, your rights are secondary to Jimmy Who Feels Bad About Having A Penis.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 03:25 PM (MMC8r)

365 Speaking of Soviet space fatalities,remember the strange things those Italian ham radio operators heard in the 60's?Dying cosmonauts and such,supposedly debunked but I wonder.

Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 03:25 PM (9XBK2)

366 Anderson Cooper hitting on some poor North Korean on Sexty Minutes.

Posted by: Craig Poe at May 19, 2013 03:26 PM (BVkEs)

367 @362 -- Is that a joke. Nothing wrong with a rich guy able to afford rich tickets. Nothing wrong with expensive tickets. Just poor PR strategy by MLB to let those, often empty, seats be seen on camera with every single pitch. The most expensive are the luxury suites anyway. AC and better food.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:27 PM (ZPrif)

368 yet another good reason for me not to have an assault weapon . . . Posted by: Peaches at May 19, 2013 07:24 PM (8lmkt) Hi Peaches! seriously. I don't even know how to explain to people why this is wrong who can't already tell it's wrong. I mean, what do you even say?

Posted by: elizabethe loves her some karaoke at May 19, 2013 03:28 PM (qPCAa)

369 What does tbe magnatrometer reading translate to in terms of effect Country Singer?

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 03:28 PM (lVb7s)

370 Neverwinter is an MMO based off Dungeons and Dragons 4th Edition.  And apparently some people looted the game for goodies because the programmers failed to have a range check done on amounts entered.  So if you offered -20,000 Astral Diamonds for a piece of gear, you would get the gear and 20,000 Astral Diamonds.  And you can convert Astral Diamonds into Zen.  Zen can also be bought using real currency.  So its a real sticky exploit.

Plus it seems there was another exploit that allowed some to one kill some bosses.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:28 PM (d0bTF)

371 Remember, girls, your rights are secondary to Jimmy Who Feels Bad About Having A Penis.

If you have a penis and it's not your absolute favorite thing in the whole wide world, by far, then you are doing it wrong. 

Posted by: Peaches knows a lot about boys at May 19, 2013 03:29 PM (8lmkt)

372 Shawnee, OK, has been smacked by a tornado. Oklahoma City, look out.

Posted by: I lurk, therefore I am, new nic eventually at May 19, 2013 03:30 PM (K+I6z)

373 DC is a boom town,lots of well paid bureacrats and wealthy lobbyists(not to mention wealthy congress critters and their staff),so those expensive seats should sell like hot cakes!Times is good in DC!!

Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 03:30 PM (9XBK2)

374 haha! My strategy worked! New Thread. Thanks NDH.

Posted by: elizabethe loves her some karaoke at May 19, 2013 03:31 PM (qPCAa)

375 Everything must revolve around protecting our precious magical elves who are magically wondrous in all their girly ways.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at May 19, 2013 03:31 PM (ZPrif)

376 370 Speaking of Soviet space fatalities,remember the strange things those Italian ham radio operators heard in the 60's?Dying cosmonauts and such,supposedly debunked but I wonder. Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 07:25 PM (9XBK2) Yeah, I've read about that. I'm pretty sure it was a hoax. http://www.astronautix.com/fam/phaonaut.htm

Posted by: rickl at May 19, 2013 03:31 PM (sdi6R)

377 Thanks for the new thread NDH.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at May 19, 2013 03:31 PM (lVb7s)

378 Elizabethe, I am doing all right.  I should be using this time while Neverwinter's servers are being patched and purged to write.  But here I am. 

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 03:32 PM (d0bTF)

379 381 Yeah,I have that site bookmarked.Excellent website.

Posted by: steevy at May 19, 2013 03:32 PM (9XBK2)

380 Is that a joke. No way. The value of my home dropped by 25 grand last month while some DC inhabitant/bloodsucking leech thinks nothing of spending 1,500 bucks to sit with his family behind home plate sipping wine. There's a disconnect in this country and it's coming to critical mass faster then a 2 X 4 to the side of the head.

Posted by: Name Withheld Upon Request [/i] at May 19, 2013 03:36 PM (U2UQk)

381 You're welcome

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at May 19, 2013 03:37 PM (piMMO)

382 I've figured out why the IRS workers wanted to know what Tea Partiers were reading--had to figure out what books to burn at the next Party meeting.

Posted by: T. at May 19, 2013 03:39 PM (vxm37)

383 You forgot the part where they both knock up a couple Occupy types. Gotta keep The Narrative going across the generations, ya know.

Posted by: Cannot see the future at May 19, 2013 03:47 PM (nEDGE)

384 As an addendum, regarding the coming fuller inquiry into the IRS, there is one, and only one, area where a witchhunt is justified--Congressional investigators need to get out of the IRS folks who did these things where any names of non-involved folks that may have been submitted--familiy members, interns, etc.--went to (i.e., are they in the hands of some third-party?) and my *personal* comfort level involves waterboarding. Won't happen, but that is my comfort level, because I've had it with the Left and their reign of terror, the IRS folks are going to lie, and the idea of a lot of info in hands of vengeful leftist groups, or at least names of folks the Left thinks may be worth blackballing, is one that is intolerable, and is actually a possible career threat to those non-involved people if it happened. The Leftists in the IRS requested info on individuals. If any was submitted, where else did it go, if anywhere?

Posted by: T. at May 19, 2013 03:55 PM (vxm37)

385 322 Conservative Monster, read The Dude's post or the Neverwinter forums if you can stand the screaming. But some people seriously ganked the diamonds for goodies market. 

And you actually paid attention to what the guy's were wearing? 

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at May 19, 2013 07:02 PM (d0bTF)

I did skim a little.   Was highly amused people were giving away cats before the servers went down.  Quite the CATastrophe.   

As for the guys, I plead ADD.   I have 30 tabs open at any given time.  

In other news, Rookie Anna Puma and Merovign are on their first XCOM mission!   Mero's looking fine with his neon green hair and handlebar mustache

Posted by: ConservativeMonster at May 19, 2013 03:55 PM (A4irB)

386 Imagine the first rape or act of sexual assault/harassment caused by the boys in the girls locker room... "trans-gendered" is more equal than biological female in the left's anti-Kyriarchical heirarchy. You have to remember that the left considers biological sex and gender to be two different things. For them, biological sex is only about who has what parts, and nothing to do with how a person acts, thinks, &c. They consider "gender" to be a "social construct" which must be abolished... unless it is contra-normative, in which case it must be celebrated. More insanity about all that here: http://politicalhat.com/tag/gender/

Posted by: The Cis-Normative Hat at May 19, 2013 03:57 PM (Vk2pI)

387 94 I'm touched. This is my first successful thread-jacking.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 04:57 PM (IC6Er)


******************************

Not hard at all, is it? Moron interests are highly eclectic, and none of us stopped learning after graduation.

Posted by: Cannot see the future at May 19, 2013 04:37 PM (nEDGE)

388 I thought they said quitting is easy -- not starting up again is the hard part.

I quit every night when I go to sleep. It's after the two eggs, rye toast and coffee that gets me started again.

Posted by: Nobody knows the troubles I've seen at May 19, 2013 04:40 PM (R5lpX)

389 298 There was a sequel to the book Forrest Gump:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gump_and_Co.

Forrest Gump was intended to depict people with traditional American
values as "Retarded." When the producers of the film were asked why they
produced such a "Conservative" film, they denied that was their intention.

After finding out that audiences were cheering the scene where Forrest Gump
jumped across the table and kicked the crap out of the SDS scumbag who
slapped Jenny, Rush Limbaugh said: "Face it, you produced a conservative
movie!"

Posted by: Leonard Jones at May 19, 2013 06:50 PM (VMLYI)


Author Winston Groome had/has a house in Cashiers, NC and one in Highlands, NC. I did some work on his home in Cashiers. Never met the man, though. Only worked a couple of days for a general contractor and then my work was done.

Posted by: Nobody knows the troubles I've seen at May 19, 2013 04:52 PM (R5lpX)

390 95 The possibility of a female to male transmission of HIV is extraordinarily low. Not so low as to call it impossible, but closer to the chance of winning a $550 million lottery than it is to the chance of male to male transmission. I realize your government will tell you otherwise, but in case you didn't know it, your government doesn't always tell you the truth. Posted by: BurtTC at May 19, 2013 04:57 PM (BeSEI) 1. Jenny's scamper was pretty worn out by the miles of cocks she got in the 60, 70's and 80's, so she preferred Forrest to hit the old squeakhole. 2. Forrest and Forrest Jr. become teh luvahs, cause, well, that is the big thing now. 3. Forrest Jr. follows daddy's path to Alabama where he plays for the now legendary coach Nick Saban, and after becoming an All American and visiting the White House, he is drafted by the Dallas Cowboys, and after signing with Jerruh, he comes out as the first openly ghey NFL player. 4. After his marriage to Mark Sanchez, he announces he got teh AIDS from dear old dad. 5. He spends the rest of the movie blaming his parents for the mess he is in, especially after the BP oil spill destroyed the Bubba Gump Shrimp Company, and the lawsuits that Bubba's family filed against Forrest Sr. for embezzlement.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, formerly MrCaniac at May 19, 2013 04:53 PM (BXLPR)

391

@392

**Not hard at all, is it? Moron interests are highly eclectic, and none of us stopped learning after graduation.

I am constantly impressed by the breadth of knowledge (and depth of depravity) exhibited by the Moron Horde.  Y'all are my kind of sick twisted folk.

Posted by: RightWingProf at May 19, 2013 05:43 PM (E/o+q)

392 Well, that certainly filled some blog space...

Posted by: SGT. York at May 19, 2013 05:49 PM (IdV/i)

393 You forgot the scene in which Forrest is at the wig shop when Moochelle decides on bangs.

Posted by: Baldy at May 19, 2013 07:57 PM (tyDFN)

394 "126 I have a dear friend from High school posting shit on FB about how racist it is to criticize the president.

Because criticizing black people is racist. They're not like white people, they're special. Sacred. Magical.

Posted by: zsasz at May 19, 2013 05:09 PM (MMC8r)"



One of the Joseph Waumbaugh books about the Los Angeles Police Department was written after Chief Darryl Gates had said something about choke holds and how the blood vessels of black people do not recover as well as the blood vessels of "normal" people.  After that particular media firestorm, the LA cops stopped referring to their police cars as "black and whites" and started calling them "black and normals".

Posted by: Obnoxious A-hole at May 20, 2013 06:23 AM (31Nrp)

395 Thank-you for that glimpse into the future of the demorats liberal utopian future.  Now if you include people eating vermin to survive and maybe cannibalism you will have a more complete picture.  Magic mushrooms growing over major America population centers would be a nice touch too.  How about people dying in the streets because people refuse to worship at the altar of Obama and drop their drawers and grab their ankles, medical treatment DENIED.

Posted by: ron n. at May 20, 2013 06:58 PM (6fvl0)

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