December 20, 2013

In Hours Before Rare Obama News Conference, Healthcare.gov Goes Down Again
— Ace

Wonderful.

Joanne Peters, a spokeswoman with the Department of Health and Human Services, said the system was deliberately taken down Friday morning due to an error that needed to be fixed. She said it should be up by early afternoon.
"Right now HealthCare.gov is queuing consumers," Peters said. "This system is in place while the tech team works on fixing an error that happened during routine maintenance last night. This work started at 10 a.m. and we anticipate this could take two to three hours and that the site will be up and running again soon."

It's so totally fixed.

Before the launch of the site, the head IT guy, Tony Trenkle, refused to sign off on the system's security. So his boss signed it instead, despite the site not being secure. Trenkle then either resigned, or was fired, or some combination of the two.

That happened again with this relaunch. Sharyl Attkisson reports:

Teresa Fryer, the chief information security officer for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS), revealed the findings when she was interviewed Tuesday behind closed doors by House Oversight Committee officials. The security risks were not previously disclosed to members of Congress or the public. Obama administration officials have firmly insisted thereÂ’s no reason for any concern regarding the websiteÂ’s security.

...

According to federal standards set by the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST), the potential impact of a high finding is “the loss of confidentiality, integrity, or availability could be expected to have a severe or catastrophic adverse effect on organizational operations, organizational assets, or individuals.”

Details are not being made public for security reasons but Fryer testified that one vulnerability in the system was discovered during testing last week related to an incident reported in November. She says that as a result, the government has shut down functionality in the vulnerable part of the system. Fryer said the other high-risk finding was discovered Monday.

In another security bombshell, Fryer told congressional interviewers that she explicitly recommended denial of the website’s Authority to Operate (ATO), but was overruled by her superiors. The website was rolled out amid warnings Fryer said she gave both verbally and in a briefing that disclosed “high risks” and possible exposure to “attacks”.

Fryer also said that she refused to put her name on a letter recommending a temporary ATO be granted for six months while the issues were sorted out.

"My recommendation was a denial of ATO," Fryer told Democrats and Republicans who sat in on the day-long interview. According to Fryer, she first recommended denying the ATO to CMS chief information officer Tony Trenkle based on the many outstanding security concerns after pre-launch testing.

Speculation: @drewmtips thinks this guess sounds plausible in explaining the current system failure:


I'm not sure about that. This New Illegal Law was just previewed last night. Have insurers even had time to crunch the actuarial numbers to assign a price for such policies?

Drew also expressed doubts about the "planned" nature of the system failure:


Hah. What a dope Drew is. He still thinks there's a thing called a "deadline" which is real.

Posted by: Ace at 09:06 AM | Comments (554)
Post contains 598 words, total size 5 kb.

1 This is how every website starts. The liberals told me so.

Posted by: Mega at December 20, 2013 09:07 AM (hHFOx)

2 It's being hacked - funny.

Posted by: jacke at December 20, 2013 09:08 AM (5Cwv4)

3 "Routine maintenance"
LOL

Posted by: Max Entropy at December 20, 2013 09:08 AM (QKYRm)

4 Such liars they are.

Posted by: huerfano at December 20, 2013 09:08 AM (bAGA/)

5 This is like watching the "Hindenburg" go down, except it's taking months instead of seconds. Oh, the humanity!

Posted by: GuyfromNH at December 20, 2013 09:08 AM (kbOju)

6 *slow clap* Barky and company are managing to shoot themselves in the foot every few days on this instead of just once and getting it over with. It would be downright hilarious if not for the people getting totally fucked by them.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:09 AM (/Crba)

7

Healthcare.gov is way easier than Kayack and Amazon

 

 

got it?

Posted by: zipline Bob at December 20, 2013 09:09 AM (W6iIX)

8 They should just rename this System of a Down.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 09:09 AM (g1DWB)

9 Ms. Fryer, we'd like to talk to you about your tax returns from the last ten years. 

Posted by: IRS at December 20, 2013 09:09 AM (DrWcr)

10 #twoweeks

Posted by: Lauren at December 20, 2013 09:09 AM (hFL/3)

11 They just need a couple of hours to change the oil and put some new toner cartridges in the printer. Totally normal routine everyday manufacturers suggested maintenance. Nothing to see here.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (+lsX1)

12

oh and Barkey does not write code either!

 

 

who knew?

Posted by: zipline Bob at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (W6iIX)

13 So there are now two people who actually did their jobs. One either got fired or "resigned". I presume that Ms. Trenkle will now be audited.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (VtjlW)

14 They should put a little sad face emoticon on the page, like my Win8 $1500 system that cratered two weeks out of warranty. That fucking sad face makes me want to throw the computer across the room.

Posted by: DangerGirl at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (0MVzQ)

15 Maybe NASA should be in charge of the website and these guys should be doing the "outreach".

Posted by: Mega at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (hHFOx)

16 It would be downright hilarious if not for the people getting totally fucked by them. Posted by: Brandon in Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 01:09 PM


You can't break a tyrant's death grip on power without breaking a few citizens.  Or a few million.

Posted by: huerfano at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (bAGA/)

17
"Right now HealthCare.gov is queuing consumers," Peters said.




You got that right lady.

Oh --- queuing. Not what I thought you said.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at December 20, 2013 09:10 AM (kdS6q)

18 The Abortable Care Act.

Posted by: Mega at December 20, 2013 09:11 AM (hHFOx)

19 12 oh and Barkey does not write code either! who knew? --- I think Democrats are incapable of writing computer code. They seem unable to understand that computer systems run by using logic statements and not how the computer feels about a particular situation.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:11 AM (/Crba)

20 Inquiring minds want to know why Barack Jr. looks like Mark's twin brother; and why they both had a stepfather Soetero.

Posted by: panzernashorn at December 20, 2013 09:11 AM (MhA4j)

21 14 They should put a little sad face emoticon on the page, like my Win8 $1500 system that cratered two weeks out of warranty. That fucking sad face makes me want to throw the computer across the room. --- Alternatively, they could use the Twitter "Fail Whale" from when the system is overwhelmed.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:11 AM (/Crba)

22 why does wandering through IT professionals to find one who'll sign off on this boondoggle remind me of the Saturday Night Massacre?

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at December 20, 2013 09:12 AM (XrGnJ)

23 They should change the name of the website to TheAristocrats.gov.

Posted by: Dr Spank at December 20, 2013 09:12 AM (P1WNR)

24 They should partner with Target.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:12 AM (MMC8r)

25

500 million lines of code in the webpage

 

and not one republican voted for this

Posted by: zipline Bob at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (W6iIX)

26 They should change the name of the website to TheAristocrats.gov.


That joke at least works.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (XrGnJ)

27 They seem unable to understand that computer systems run by using logic statements and not how the computer feels about a particular situation. Boolean operators are so judgmental.

Posted by: Typical Lefty [/i] at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (6Nqkf)

28

Meet the new hack,

Same as the old hack...

Posted by: Conservative Crank at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (sQ0LB)

29 I think Democrats are incapable of writing computer code. Real world skills are beneath our law-degreed overlords.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (MMC8r)

30 Now wait just a minute here.  President Obama gave a speech right?  So everything is fixed, right?  right???!

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (F192H)

31 When everyone on your team looks and acts like pajama boy, how can the results be any different?

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (bCEmE)

32 why does wandering through IT professionals to find one who'll sign off on this boondoggle remind me of the Saturday Night Massacre?

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at December 20, 2013 01:12 PM (XrGnJ)


The difference is that this will be suppressed as much as possible by the media lapdogs!

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (o3MSL)

33 Literally every successful business has started off as a complete disaster. It's like when Amazon first launched and the site crashed constantly and shipped the wrong items and when you got your credit card bill you found that you were charged like six times as much as you were quoted. It's pretty standard stuff.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at December 20, 2013 09:13 AM (+lsX1)

34 If it's so damn secure, Obama should put his and his family's info on the website to prove it Choo choo joe should do the same

Posted by: Navypopojoe at December 20, 2013 09:14 AM (HQX6o)

35 Totally normal for a system admin to lunge towards the network cable 4 times a day.

Posted by: UWP at December 20, 2013 09:14 AM (2hQRj)

36 "I've giv'n her all she's got captain, an' I canna give her no more. She won't take much more of this. This jury-rigging won't last..."

Posted by: Montie O'Bamabit Scott at December 20, 2013 09:14 AM (KQp38)

37

Fryer also said that she refused to put her name on a letter recommending a temporary ATO be granted for six months while the issues were sorted out.  My recommendation was a denial of ATO.


-----


Oh snap.... forget the audit.   That's a drone strike.

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 09:14 AM (nELVU)

38 >>> They should change the name of the website to TheAristocrats.gov. You have won one internet.

Posted by: fluffy at December 20, 2013 09:15 AM (Ua6T/)

39 They need a peppy tune sung by a plaid-wearing douche with a guitar.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:15 AM (MMC8r)

40 It's all becoming clear to me now. I've been wondering what Corky Biden has been up to the last few months when he has been out of the public eye. Corky write computer!

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 09:15 AM (g1DWB)

41

"We have found the security breach, and it is wearing plaid pajamas."

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:15 AM (F192H)

42 Mrs H said she is so glad that Obama like totes completely fixed Obamacare with his press conference before he departed on his 17 M$ Hawaii vacation that 5 million American citizens that have had their insurance canceled could never afford.

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 20, 2013 09:15 AM (o3MSL)

43 Healthcare.gov is one epic chronic auto-buggering. There goes my schadenboner again.

Posted by: RightWingProf at December 20, 2013 09:15 AM (ceOhI)

44 That website is better than Target!!!

Posted by: United Identity Thieves of America at December 20, 2013 09:16 AM (wAQA5)

45 Maybe the 2 o'clock press conference is to announce he's resigning.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:16 AM (MMC8r)

46 42 Mrs H said she is so glad that Obama like totes completely fixed Obamacare with his press conference before he departed on his 17 M$ Hawaii vacation that 5 million American citizens that have had their insurance canceled could never afford. --- Don't forget that those 5 million have been offered the chance to get catastrophic insurance, which Barry calls "phony insurance", for the price of their old policies.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:16 AM (/Crba)

47 If it's so damn secure, Obama should put his and his family's info on the website to prove it
Choo choo joe should do the same

Posted by: Navypopojoe at December 20, 2013 01:14 PM (HQX6o)


A good start would be for Obarky to put his college transcripts on the web site!

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 20, 2013 09:16 AM (o3MSL)

48 I blame Big Anus.

Posted by: Dr. Jesse Pinkman at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (h4eud)

49 46 Maybe the 2 o'clock press conference is to announce he's resigning. --- If he's resigning, I'm a Chinese jet pilot.

Posted by: Ashley Williams at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (/Crba)

50 Impeachment      seems to be the only way to end this nightmare

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (gJyfA)

51

In Soviet Russia--look, I don't have a Yakov Smirnoff joke for this.  Even the Politboro couldn't screw up healthcare this badly.

Posted by: Conservative Crank at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (sQ0LB)

52 42. Uggggh Is it wrong to hope a disaster happens on the mainland so he stays there and leaves us alone?

Posted by: Navypopojoe at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (HQX6o)

53
*** sets down luggage packed for trip to Hawaii***

"....  BREACH????......  I thought you said BEACH...."

Posted by: Our President at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (nELVU)

54 "Wait, wait.  We found the problem.  It wasn't even plugged in!  Can you imagine?  No.  Wait.  That's not it...Hummmm..."

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:17 AM (F192H)

55 In my job for the federal government, we're made aware of all the laws restricting the dissemination of "Personally Identifiable Information".    (Ex:  SSNs, etc)  Made to know how carefully we have to handle any such PII we have access to.  

Funny how those laws get ignored.  

Posted by: ConservativeMonster at December 20, 2013 09:18 AM (ohV1B)

56 39 They need a peppy tune sung by a plaid-wearing douche with a guitar. Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 01:15 PM (MMC8r) Or four sinewy guys in their briefs dancing around with each other while wearing Santa/elf/reindeer hats. That outta fix it. Oh wait...http://tinyurl.com/llyys66

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 09:18 AM (bCEmE)

57 "Unexpectedly..."

i'm LMFAO at this whole mess, but only because that's a better option than utter despair for the future of my country.

Posted by: redc1c4 at December 20, 2013 09:18 AM (q+fqH)

58

Websites...how do they work?

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:18 AM (F192H)

59 51 right

Posted by: panzernashorn at December 20, 2013 09:19 AM (MhA4j)

60 "you go to War with the website you have"

Posted by: buzz at December 20, 2013 09:19 AM (i27M5)

61 Sign up for healthcare - get a $1 dollar off coupon for Target!

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:19 AM (F192H)

62 58. From "Suddenly" to "Unexpectedly"...

Posted by: panzernashorn at December 20, 2013 09:19 AM (MhA4j)

63 NASA can't remember how to build rockets we built in the 60s. HHS can't remember how to build websites we built in the 90s.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:19 AM (MMC8r)

64 AND UNPRECEDENTED!!

Posted by: panzernashorn at December 20, 2013 09:20 AM (MhA4j)

65 "Don't forget that those 5 million have been offered the chance to get catastrophic insurance, which Barry calls "phony insurance", for the price of their old policies."

Posted by: Brandon in BR at December 20, 2013 01:16 PM (/Crba)

And with higher premiums and higher deductibles and lower caps.

Amazing how with a few golden boy words, substandard plans can be transformed into the perfect interim solution!

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 20, 2013 09:20 AM (o3MSL)

66 You just didn't believe enough.

Posted by: Clownf*cker at December 20, 2013 09:20 AM (V40IZ)

67 52 In Soviet Russia--look, I don't have a Yakov Smirnoff joke for this. Even the Politboro couldn't screw up healthcare this badly. --- Every country have boneheaded political screw-up to make fun of. In America, it is Obamacare. In Soviet Russia, it is Obamacare.

Posted by: Yakov Smirnoff at December 20, 2013 09:20 AM (/Crba)

68 "Want a reminder?"  No thanks, I've been reminded enough about your incompetance.

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:20 AM (F192H)

69 Mizz Obama, This holiday treat has corn in it and tastes like shit. Sincerely, America

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at December 20, 2013 09:20 AM (oFCZn)

70

Maybe the 2 o'clock press conference is to announce he's resigning.

 

You'll get an extempore lecture from Biden about Boolean logic before that happens.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 20, 2013 09:21 AM (zF6Iw)

71 I'm thinking that the website being inoperable or (mostly) down since Oct 1st was actually a good thing. Far fewer people have had their identities stolen and/or automatically enrolled in Medicaid than if the site was functional.
Still sucks for people who need insurance, just maybe sucks a teensy bit less?

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:21 AM (ruxvM)

72 55 "Wait, wait. We found the problem. It wasn't even plugged in! Can you imagine? No. Wait. That's not it...Hummmm..." Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 01:17 PM (F192H) Funniest part of Naked Gun 2 1/2 is when Frank trips over the cord, unplugging the device and thus disarming the bomb. Healthcare.gov is kinda like that.

Posted by: AmishDude at December 20, 2013 09:21 AM (T0NGe)

73 65 NASA can't remember how to build rockets we built in the 60s. HHS can't remember how to build websites we built in the 90s. --- Two words - "Operation Paperclip". Go into NASA today, shout "Heil Hitler!" and see how many of them stand up and salute!

Posted by: Mallory Archer at December 20, 2013 09:21 AM (/Crba)

74 When they built the website they couldn't get helium, so they used hydrogen.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:21 AM (MMC8r)

75 "you go to War with the website you have"

Posted by: buzz at December 20, 2013 01:19 PM (i27M5)


With Obama it's "You go to Hawaii with the website you have!".

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 20, 2013 09:22 AM (o3MSL)

76 30% of the time, the wesite works 100% of the time. 

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:22 AM (F192H)

77 71 Mizz Obama, This holiday treat has corn in it and tastes like shit. Sincerely, America --- We'll still eat it anyway! Sincerely, Democrats

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:22 AM (/Crba)

78 "Details are not being made public for security reasons"
Meanwhile, Target didn't just announce a 40 million card breach because they wanted to. They did it because its a federal law. Feds would have their ass in a cell if they didn't. There's only one entity immune from that law and guess who it is.

Posted by: UWP at December 20, 2013 09:22 AM (2hQRj)

79 So his boss signed it instead, despite the site not being secure.

Have I mentioned that if I or anyone in my office signed docs for the FAA knowing full well that our engine software had a major defect, we'd all go to prison?

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at December 20, 2013 09:23 AM (ZKzrr)

80 Uhh.. Is it possible that they're just turning off the age restrictions on the catastrophic plans and not giving insurers time to recalc the numbers? Dear god, that'd be awful, and predictable.

Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) No Really! at December 20, 2013 09:23 AM (GaqMa)

81 Problem was someone told them to build the website with rock and roll!

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:23 AM (F192H)

82 I love that this will hurt the insurer's bottom lines.  They got in bed with Obama because they loved the idea of everyone in the country being mandated to buy their products.  But now they have no idea what to sell to who but have to deliver the goods like everyone bought it, whether they did or not. 

Then I realize they'll all just get a bailout to cover the losses. 

Posted by: shillelagh at December 20, 2013 09:24 AM (hRzu2)

83 I blame Pajama boy.  No reason.  I just do.

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:24 AM (F192H)

84 I think we should all jump on the website, and request to have an email sent when the site is back up!  Just use the email address: sf.nancy@mail.house.gov

Think of the fun!

Posted by: Dave G at December 20, 2013 09:24 AM (WE9e/)

85 >>>I'm not sure about that. This New Illegal Law was just previewed last night. Have insurers even had time to crunch the actuarial numbers to assign a price for such policies?

Yes but I guarantee it would be a rough cut estimate. Another little diddy Obama doesn't understand. When you rush business to assume risk and price that risk, AND make them stand by that price. You think you are going to get a lean competitive quote, or a bloated quote full of contingency for stuff they didn't have time to thoroughly analyze? If the product is something a company is being forced to sell and doesn't really want to?

Yes Obama, more than willing to financially damage American families to paper over his incompetency at implementing his disastrous signature piece of legislation.

That is Obama and his Presidency in a nutshell.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Laughing Maniacally While Throwing Matches. at December 20, 2013 09:24 AM (GMaWX)

86 What's the over/under that Obama delays his Hawaiin vacation to stay at the helm during this critical period in the implementation of Obamacare?

{{laughs so hard my stomach cramps}}

OK, maybe he'll delay his departure for a few hours to "show" us how much he cares, you guys,  but mostly so that he can travel separately from Michelle.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:24 AM (ruxvM)

87 Clearly this is the fault of Booosh doe getting all the good programmers killed in a needless war in Iraq and sending those left alive to GITMO.

Posted by: Mallamutt, at December 20, 2013 01:22 PM (OWjjx)



Actually, this is the argument for total amnesty so we can get more Indian programmers on the job to do the job the Canadians couldn't do!

Posted by: Hrothgar at December 20, 2013 09:24 AM (o3MSL)

88 *points finger at wily GOP l33t h@ck3rz*

Posted by: jakeman at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (vH4YP)

89

Whaddya wanna bet that the press conference was originally called to announce  a new, improved website available for the masses just in time for Christmas?

 

God has a wicked sense of humor.....

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX (@Teresa_Koch) at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (PZ6/M)

90
Is it possible that they're just turning off the age restrictions on the catastrophic plans and not giving insurers time to recalc the numbers?

Dear god, that'd be awful, and predictable.

Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) No Really! at December 20, 2013 01:23 PM (GaqMa)


See?  I told you teabaggers the insurance would be free!

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (i9vov)

91 Duck Commander: works Obamacare: doesn't work

Posted by: WalrusRex at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (DvSqC)

92 We can laugh at their incompetence, but seriously, people are probably going to suffer and or die next year due to that incompetence.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (gJyfA)

93 In cable TV, carriage fees are key, that's the fee per subscriber the cable companies pay the networks to carry their channel. It's a wholesale price which then gets passed on to the subscriber's monthly bill. In 2010, ESPN was #1 with $4.08 per month. Per subscriber. With about 100M household subscribing that's $408M a month ESPN makes before selling a single advertisement. $5B a year before selling ad #1. A&E only got $0.25 per month. Fox News got $0.58. CNN got $0.51 CNBC got $0.29 MSNBC got $0.16. Here's the list. http://allthingsd.com/20100308/hate-paying-for-cable-heres-the-reason-why/ ESPN is reportedly up to $5.54 in 2013 and FoxNews is now over a $1. The actual amounts vary from cable provider to cable provider as Fox or Disney negotiates separate deals with Comcast, Time Warner, etc.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (ZPrif)

94 Go into NASA today, shout "Heil Hitler!" and see how many of them stand up and salute!

Posted by: Mallory Archer at December 20, 2013 01:21 PM (/Crba)

 

SCHLEMMER!!!!

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (zF6Iw)

95
OK, maybe he'll delay his departure for a few hours to "show" us how much he cares,

-----

I wouldn't bet on it.....

Posted by: Zombie Ambassador Stephens at December 20, 2013 09:25 AM (nELVU)

96 Have they tried turning it off and then turning it back on again?

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at December 20, 2013 09:26 AM (+lsX1)

97 Actually, this is the argument for total amnesty so we can get more Indian programmers on the job to do the job the Canadians couldn't do! --- Which still misses the point if they do this... The problem wasn't the programmers, it was the various executives who were supposed to be over the project such as a project manager and a systems architect. They would have been better off hiring the Two Bobs from Office Space as consultants to run this project.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:26 AM (/Crba)

98 Don't lie people. I went to Obamacare.com and got my insurance in less then five minutes. You people must be stupid or something when someone like me who never graduated high school can sign up like that. Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !

Posted by: Chrissy Liebowitz at December 20, 2013 09:26 AM (iB0Q2)

99 Pres Obama says Malia looking to get her driver's license, but he won't teach her to drive. "Too much anxiety and hollerin," for a parent. Awww. Just. Like. Us.

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 09:27 AM (fWAjv)

100 In 2010, ESPN was #1 with $4.08 per month. Imagine what a la carte pricing would do. Considering I never watch ESPN, fuck those lefty fucks.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:27 AM (MMC8r)

101 I inherited this website from my predecessor.

Posted by: King Bambi at December 20, 2013 09:28 AM (hHFOx)

102 What's funny is that healthcare.gov on facebook has been posting countdowns for coverage for the past few days. 5 days to get coverage! 3 days to get coverage! As you can imagine, this is going over like a lead balloon.

Posted by: Lauren at December 20, 2013 09:28 AM (hFL/3)

103 Please feel free to type in all your financial and medical data into our glitch prone website.  I mean, what's the worst that could happen?

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:28 AM (F192H)

104 peppy tune sung by a plaid-wearing douche with a guitar

I don't know the words, but I can hum.

Posted by: Chubbles Jhosnon at December 20, 2013 09:28 AM (NVvNk)

105

Old and busted: Reality has a liberal bias

 

New hotness: Math

Posted by: Conservative Crank at December 20, 2013 09:29 AM (sQ0LB)

106 103 Pres Obama says Malia looking to get her driver's license, but he won't teach her to drive. "Too much anxiety and hollerin," for a parent. Awww. Just. Like. Us. --- Not being said - "Why let her drive when we can force her Secret Service minder to do it for her?"

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:29 AM (/Crba)

107 What if the People's Republic of China hacks Obamacare so it works?

Posted by: Chris_Balsz at December 20, 2013 09:29 AM (5xmd7)

108

The same mindset that       demands a baker make a wedding cake for a homosexual wedding under pain of imprisonment, is the one that says     roll out an illogical law, with ever-changing rules, on a website that rarely works, by date certain regardless of how it ends up.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 09:29 AM (gJyfA)

109 103 Pres Obama says Malia looking to get her driver's license, but he won't teach her to drive. "Too much anxiety and hollerin," for a parent. Awww. Just. Like. Us. Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 01:27 PM (fWAjv) Not really...most of us taught our kids how to drive, anxiety and hollering included. Does TFG do anything!?

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 09:29 AM (bCEmE)

110 404care has Down Syndrome...

Posted by: john boner at December 20, 2013 09:29 AM (P9kUH)

111 "I shook the box with the website thingy in it, and now it is working."

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:30 AM (F192H)

112 >>"Too much anxiety and hollerin," for a parent.

Awwwww,I love it when he gets all folksy and drops his g's.
The use of "holler" is a nice touch, to.
Bet John "where can I get me a huntin' license" Kerry helped him with that one.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:30 AM (ruxvM)

113 I want to wish Senator Reed a speedy recovery and I know he will be OK because he is enrolled in Obamacare.  Please get well soon because we need you to fix Bush's screw-ups.......

Posted by: Chrissy Liebowitz at December 20, 2013 09:30 AM (iB0Q2)

114 If FoxNews is now above $1 per subscriber per month then, since they are also in about 100M American homes, that's a cool $1.2B per year in revenue. All before selling a single ad. All before any international distribution. Nice business.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:30 AM (ZPrif)

115 "Two words - "Operation Paperclip".


If you're saying "only scientists who lived under Nazi oppression  can build rockets", we're in  better shape than you'd think.

Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 09:30 AM (4I3Uo)

116 Does TFG do anything!? --- Supposedly he golfs. Maybe that's just a euphemism for Reggie putting on the 19th hole, though.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:30 AM (/Crba)

117 Old and busted: Reality has a liberal bias New hotness: Math They really won't like Mr. Math.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 09:31 AM (GjYxB)

118 >>Does TFG do anything!?

Above his pay grade.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:31 AM (ruxvM)

119

I don't know about the rest of you, but when I think about quality website design, I think about the federal government.

Posted by: Kirk's Gorn at December 20, 2013 09:31 AM (F192H)

120 120 "Two words - "Operation Paperclip". If you're saying "only scientists who lived under Nazi oppression can build rockets", we're in better shape than you'd think. --- I was making an Archer joke, but my underlying belief is that we used to hire for talent but, now, we're probably hiring to meet PC demands. As a result, the quality of what we're capable of doing has dropped drastically.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:32 AM (/Crba)

121  I suspect Obama is a lousy driver who knows next to nothing about cars.

Posted by: Mallamutt, at December 20, 2013 01:29 PM (OWjjx)

 

And I'm getting sick of always having to change the flat tires.

Posted by: Big Mooch at December 20, 2013 09:32 AM (wAQA5)

122 115 404care has Down Syndrome...

Posted by: john boner at December 20, 2013 01:29 PM (P9kUH)

 

 

 

Don't insult my daughter's intelligence like that.....

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX (@Teresa_Koch) at December 20, 2013 09:32 AM (PZ6/M)

123

They really won't like Mr. Math.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 01:31 PM (GjYxB)

 

Math doesn't get mad.  Math just gets even.

Posted by: Conservative Crank at December 20, 2013 09:32 AM (sQ0LB)

124 I FOUND THE PROBLEM.  UNPLUGGED THE SERVER AND "SYSTEM IS DOWN" NO LONGER APPEARS.

Posted by: BEN ROETHLISBERGER, GOVERNMENT CONTRACTOR at December 20, 2013 09:32 AM (B/VB5)

125 Thinking back on it, it was a good thing that this guy decided not to send us to Mars.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at December 20, 2013 09:33 AM (RubvK)

126 Have they unplugged the modem for ten minutes, and then turned it back on?

Posted by: Comcast Tech Support at December 20, 2013 09:33 AM (teMpq)

127 "As a result, the quality of what we're capable of doing has dropped drastically."

But our  Arabic is impeccable.

Posted by: NASA at December 20, 2013 09:33 AM (4I3Uo)

128 News Corp's path to global domination is followed the classic Risk strategy -- first lock up Australia.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:33 AM (ZPrif)

129 Damn, I knew there was a reason I usually only molested one little boy at a time.

Posted by: Harry Reid from his hospital bed at December 20, 2013 09:33 AM (i9vov)

130 So basically God is trolling Obama.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 09:34 AM (RD7QR)

131 I think Democrats are incapable of writing computer code. They seem unable to understand that computer systems run by using logic statements and not how the computer feels about a particular situation. Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 01:11 PM (/Crba) The psychopaths for whom I used to work were all huge libs. They were constantly, and I mean constantly, stunned when they were informed that whatever it was they wanted could not be done. Here! We need this 45 minute video converted to digital format in the next 15 minutes! What do you mean that is physically impossible, failure is not an option! As you can guess, that is not a random example.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 09:34 AM (VtjlW)

132 So, what happens when it becomes common knowledge that the "mandate" is completely toothless if you don't get a tax refund? ACA says no criminal penalties can be assessed for failure to pay the mandate tax/penalty and the IRS is specifically prohibited from using the attachment power to enforce it. At best, they can reduce your tax refund.

Posted by: Komissar Vladimir at December 20, 2013 09:34 AM (sBegS)

133 Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 01:34 PM (VtjlW) In the list of times handed to me that I've been "unprofessional" one of them was because I told a fellow student "yeah, economics doesn't work that way." I didn't take it back.

Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) No Really! at December 20, 2013 09:35 AM (GaqMa)

134 129 I FOUND THE PROBLEM. UNPLUGGED THE SERVER AND "SYSTEM IS DOWN" NO LONGER APPEARS. --- The system is down! The system is down!

Posted by: StrongBad at December 20, 2013 09:36 AM (/Crba)

135 In Hours Before Rare Obama News Conference, Healthcare.gov Goes Down Again

 

It's news like this   that proves    Santa Claus exists.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 09:36 AM (4df7R)

136 Just  curious. Does everyone who signs up for Obamacare get a free, all expenses paid trip to Hawaii or is that simply reserved for Mr. Obama and his family?

Posted by: Marcus at December 20, 2013 09:37 AM (GGCsk)

137 Posted by: Komissar Vladimir at December 20, 2013 01:34 PM (sBegS) If I had to guess though, a lot of the people going without insurance will be eligible for refunds anyway. In my experience anyone who draws payroll check as a primary driver of income gets a refund because you can't control your withholding and they always conveniently overestimate.

Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) No Really! at December 20, 2013 09:37 AM (GaqMa)

138 Fuck you folks. Im gonna give a stupid speech for the LIV, then Im going to Hawaii for 3 weeks, on your checkbook. LOL.

Posted by: obama at December 20, 2013 09:37 AM (DG1Fm)

139 What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM?

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at December 20, 2013 09:37 AM (r+7wo)

140 The reason they call ACA "ObamaCare" is this: The "law" is simply a blanket permission for Obama to make Presidential Announcements about healthcare, at his whim and with no congressional participation. The law is not named after Obama because he write it nor because it was his idea; no, the law is named after him because it was created to give him dictatorial powers over this aspect of the economy. There are 2,000 pages in the law, and 20,000 ancillary pages of regulations. Do you think Obama has read ANY of these pages? Of course not. The first sentence of the ACA is "President Obama may make any pronouncement he likes concerning healthcare, and these pronouncement automatically become law." The remaining 1,999 pages all say, over and over, "ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES CONGRESS A DULL BOY."

Posted by: zombie at December 20, 2013 09:37 AM (+cx5n)

141 The psychopaths for whom I used to work were all huge libs. They were constantly, and I mean constantly, stunned when they were informed that whatever it was they wanted could not be done. Here! We need this 45 minute video converted to digital format in the next 15 minutes! What do you mean that is physically impossible, failure is not an option! As you can guess, that is not a random example. --- My former boss has been on the receiving end of a lot of my venting regarding this kind of bullshit and has been a saint about it because she agrees with me. She's only my "former" boss due to a reorg, not one of us quitting or having to be forcibly separated.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:37 AM (/Crba)

142 At this point, I think God is just fuckin' with Obama.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (teMpq)

143 What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM?

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at December 20, 2013 01:37 PM (r+7wo)

 

 

Scheduled maintenance at 10am on the last business day before the holiday week when everyone is supposed to have bought their insurance.

 

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (4df7R)

144 I just took solace in the likelihood that they're going to be as good at getting us into the camps as they are at getting us into Obamacare.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (MMC8r)

145 Have they unplugged the modem for ten minutes, and then turned it back on?

Posted by: Comcast Tech Support at December 20, 2013 01:33 PM (teMpq)


-----


Ive always thought a hilarious hack to the ACA website would be to have the sound of an old dial modem play in the background on the homepage....

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (nELVU)

146 What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM?

One for which the convenience of the workers on the site is the first and only priority, and fcuk the peasants.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (B/VB5)

147 145 What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM? --- One which has a server headquartered 7-10 hours "before" your time zone?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (/Crba)

148 I suspect Obama is a lousy driver who knows next to nothing about cars. What's the Vegas over-under on how many flat tires he's ever changed? I'll take the under.

Posted by: jakeman at December 20, 2013 09:38 AM (vH4YP)

149 Ive always thought a hilarious hack to the ACA website would be to have the sound of an old dial modem play in the background on the homepage.... --- Why hack that site? It's enough of a parody without anyone outside the government touching it.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 09:39 AM (/Crba)

150 It's only in recent years that FoxNews was able to charge more per subscriber than CNN. CNN's prestige kept them getting more money for a decade after FoxNews passed them in ratings.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:39 AM (ZPrif)

151 I'd piss on a spark plug if I thought it'd do any good.

Posted by: Gen. I.T. Berenger (Ret), Obamacare Director of Operations at December 20, 2013 09:40 AM (KQp38)

152 At this point, I think God is just fuckin' with Obama.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 01:38 PM (teMpq)


Shame it doesn't involve a few lightning strikes and some Indiana Jones-style face melting....

Posted by: Left Ear of Vecna at December 20, 2013 09:40 AM (i9vov)

153 What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM? Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at December 20, 2013 01:37 PM (r+7wo) They hired the people who maintain the Cross Bronx Expressway here in NYC

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 09:41 AM (t3UFN)

154 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces?

Posted by: 7 Days in May at December 20, 2013 09:41 AM (j6DTo)

155 BTW, there isn't any LAW anymore.

Just Guidelines and Recommendations.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 09:41 AM (LSDdO)

156 >>What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM?

Uh, you expect us to work off-hours?
My union says I don't have to do anything outside of M-F, 9:00am-5:00pm. Not with out A LOT of prior approval, advance notice and heavy compensation.

Posted by: Federal Employee at December 20, 2013 09:41 AM (ruxvM)

157 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces?

Marcotte's Syndrome

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at December 20, 2013 09:42 AM (ltdV/)

158

what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces

 

Poopophile.

 

 

You're welcome.

Posted by: eleven at December 20, 2013 09:42 AM (fsLdt)

159 My union says I don't have to do anything outside of M-F, 9:00am-5:00pm. That's why you hire an IT center in India.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:42 AM (MMC8r)

160 The remaining 1,999 pages all say, over and over, "ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES CONGRESS A DULL BOY."

No, the remaining pages detail all of what Insty likes to call the opportunities for graft.  We only wish they were nonsense.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 20, 2013 09:42 AM (B/VB5)

161 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces?

Posted by: 7 Days in May at December 20, 2013 01:41 PM (j6DTo)

 

Joe Biden

Posted by: The Jackhole at December 20, 2013 09:42 AM (nTgAI)

162 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces? MSNBC viewer.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:43 AM (MMC8r)

163

This website is to Obama like Banquo's ghost was to MacBeth.

 

I hope he enjoys his stay in Hawaii, because when he gets back this is still going to be sitting at the table, waiting for him.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Death Capades - ObamaCare on Ice! Sponsored by the Outrage Outlet at December 20, 2013 09:43 AM (hLRSq)

164 165 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces Poopophile. You're welcome. --- EWW! You sick little monkey!

Posted by: Mr. Mackey, Mmmm-kay? at December 20, 2013 09:43 AM (/Crba)

165 So where are the Republicans in all of this?

I get the schadenfreude and stepping out of the way of disaster. But where is the very public "guys in white hats riding to the rescue" effort?

We are going to repeal this disaster, this is why and this is what we are going to do. Lather, rinse, repeat until people get tired of seeing your face and hearing your voice.

Anybody?

Sooner or later, people are going to lump the entire government into one giant indistinguishable pile of hate.

Posted by: Marcus at December 20, 2013 09:43 AM (GGCsk)

166 As God is my witness, I thought this turkey would fly.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 09:44 AM (LSDdO)

167 We haven't even gotten to the inevitable ChiCom DNS attacks yet.   I'm sure their "specialists" are laughing their asses off over this mess.

Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 09:44 AM (4I3Uo)

168

what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces?

 

Ethan Krupp

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 09:44 AM (4df7R)

169 According to StateOfTheMedia.org Fox News had $1.8B in total revenue in 2012 CNN had $1.1B MSNBC had $0.4B In profit: Fox News had $985M in profit CNN had $413M MSNBC had $203M So they basically take half of their revenue as profit. Nice business.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:44 AM (ZPrif)

170 Poopophile. Probably 'coprophile.'

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:44 AM (MMC8r)

171 >>What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM? What seems more likely, the site crashed under a heavy load seeing as how this is the last weekday to buy insurance or they decided to do scheduled maintenance on what is likely to be the busiest time the site has ever seen?

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 09:44 AM (g1DWB)

172 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces? Cub's fan.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:45 AM (MMC8r)

173 What's the Vegas over-under on how many flat tires he's ever changed? I'll take the under. Before I ever began the first behind the wheel driver training with my daughter I made her change the tire -- well take it off and put it back on. She learned that a skinny 100# girl could actually lift up a 5,000 truck, loosen lug nuts, and wrestle a tire off and back on again. Confidence building exercise. I would have helped her if she needed it but she didn't. Kinda shocked me. Lesson number two was this is why you keep your eyes on the road and avoid hitting potholes.

Posted by: Regular Moron [/i] at December 20, 2013 09:45 AM (6Nqkf)

174 Can they use the extra money they got from screwing veterans to fix it?

Posted by: Meremortal, nicompoops everywhere at December 20, 2013 09:45 AM (1Y+hH)

175 That? That?

That's the sound of lefty trolls crying into their cheetos stained jockeys.

Hey ERG, Tom Sawyer, coome out too play-yaaaaaaay.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at December 20, 2013 09:45 AM (H4Rpo)

176 I saw Queuing Customers open for The Who in Cincinnati back in '79.

Posted by: Joe at December 20, 2013 09:45 AM (7pOq5)

177 Oop. 'Cubs.'

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:46 AM (MMC8r)

178 In the list of times handed to me that I've been "unprofessional" one of them was because I told a fellow student "yeah, economics doesn't work that way." I didn't take it back. Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) No Really! at December 20, 2013 01:35 PM (GaqMa) Oh I got called in before the office manager the day after the video incident and informed that I was to be officially reprimanded for refusing to do it. When I explained to her that I did not refuse to do it but that it was physically impossible for it to be done, she just stared at me and then said "Well, you should have found another way to do it." I laughed in her face. There was also the time that the video conferencing equipment went out in the middle of a deposition and all hell broke loose. After much screaming at our ISP by me, I was informed that the problem was that a trawler cut a transatlantic cable and pretty much half of the East Coast was down. When I informed my boss of that, that lovely next Tuesday started screaming at me in front of several people from out of the office about how I was lying and that it was my fault and I had to go fix it. I just turned on my heel and walked out of the room.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 09:46 AM (VtjlW)

179 Down for scheduled maintenance? If you believe that, I have a government website I'd like to sell you.

Posted by: uncle jj at December 20, 2013 09:46 AM (9b2ES)

180 "So where are the Republicans in all of this?"

Cowering in the corner, quivering in an ever-expanding puddle of piss and terrified that the MSM might say something mean about them.


Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 09:46 AM (4I3Uo)

181 CNN still charges higher advertising rates than Fox, at least as of 2011.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:46 AM (ZPrif)

182 We haven't even gotten to the inevitable ChiCom DNS attacks yet. I'm sure their "specialists" are laughing their asses off over this mess.

Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 01:44 PM (4I3Uo)


----


Ahhh.... soo  sorry commander.   We cannot hack American website.  Website cannot be hacked if it never is up.

Posted by: ChiCom Hacker at December 20, 2013 09:47 AM (nELVU)

183 165 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces You need to watch South Park's original Mr. Hanky episode right now!

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 09:47 AM (7ObY1)

184 They had accidentally added Catastrophic Bureaucratic Bungling and Malfeasance Coverage

Posted by: Beto at December 20, 2013 09:47 AM (MhA4j)

185 *had to do this the right way*

"As God is my witness, I thought this Turkey would fly."

Posted by: B Rocky O'Breezy at KCUF in DC at December 20, 2013 09:48 AM (LSDdO)

186 Under ObamaCare, 'scheduled maintenance' strikes without warning.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:48 AM (MMC8r)

187 and not one republican voted for this Posted by: zipline Bob at December 20, 2013 01:13 PM (W6iIX) I guess I should think of that every time I want to give Republicans hell. It's something.

Posted by: Meremortal, nick o' time at December 20, 2013 09:48 AM (1Y+hH)

188 and not one republican voted for this

Posted by: zipline Bob at December 20, 2013 01:13 PM (W6iIX)

 

The Republicans are the "stupid party", not the "clinically insane party".  The Democrats have that last lable firmly tied to themselves.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Death Capades - ObamaCare on Ice! Sponsored by the Outrage Outlet at December 20, 2013 09:48 AM (hLRSq)

189 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces?

play's?

Verrrry interestink.

Schtupid... but interestink.

Posted by: Arte Johnson at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (NVvNk)

190 "So where are the Republicans in all of this?" Cowering in the corner, quivering in an ever-expanding puddle of piss and terrified that the MSM might say something mean about them. Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 01:46 PM (4I3Uo) And working on amnesty.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (bCEmE)

191 Hmm, if this website stays down, I'll have nothing to talk about over the holidays except Women's Studies, indie music and organic soy.  My Dad is going to kick my ass again...probably grandma too.

Posted by: Pajamas Boy at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (eV1I0)

192 I get the schadenfreude and stepping out of the way of disaster. But where is the very public "guys in white hats riding to the rescue" effort? I saw on Tammy Bruces twitter a couple of days ago that a shitload of (R) signatures are behind a proposal. I read the two page synopsis of the plan, but since they still expected people to pay for insurance it didn't look too promising.

Posted by: Regular Moron [/i] at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (6Nqkf)

193 I'd like to see Rand Paul stride to the Senate floor for a speech about ObamaCare, laugh heartily for ten minutes into the microphone, then cede the floor.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (MMC8r)

194 Boolean operators are so judgmental.

I'm stealing that.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (ZKzrr)

195 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces? Hebephrenic.

Posted by: zombie at December 20, 2013 09:49 AM (+cx5n)

196 What type of stupid website does scheduled maintenance at 10 AM? The type maintained by a Union goon who only "works" 10am to 3pm.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b] at December 20, 2013 09:50 AM (A0glY)

197 "And working on amnesty."

Well, *somebody* has to clean up this puddle of piss.  It most certainly isn't going to be *me*.

Posted by: Your Pre-Moistened GOP Betters at December 20, 2013 09:50 AM (4I3Uo)

198 Fox Business Network actually was profitable in 2012 for the first time, after bleeding cash since it's inception in 2007. CNBC is still king. Question is how long Bloomberg TV will last. Fox Business has a huge advantage that News Corp always bundles it with FoxNews. So the carriers have to pay up for it if they want ratings juggernaut FoxNews.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:51 AM (ZPrif)

199 >>I'd like to see Rand Paul stride to the Senate floor for a speech about ObamaCare, laugh heartily for ten minutes into the microphone, then cede the floor.

Followed by Ted Cruz saying, "I gave them the opportunity to delay this and they called me a terrorist."

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:51 AM (ruxvM)

200 I saw  Hebephrenic  at  my   friend's Bar Mitzvah in '77.

Posted by: eleven at December 20, 2013 09:52 AM (fsLdt)

201 What are we going to be saying when it's up and running finally? Because it will be. And all this will be forgotten. The MSM will make sure of it.

Posted by: rrpjr at December 20, 2013 09:52 AM (s/yC1)

202 Last November, Pornhub offered to help with Healthcare website: http://tinyurl.com/koyp8fn

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 09:52 AM (bCEmE)

203 There was also the time that the video conferencing equipment went out in the middle of a deposition and all hell broke loose. After much screaming at our ISP by me, I was informed that the problem was that a trawler cut a transatlantic cable and pretty much half of the East Coast was down. When I informed my boss of that, that lovely next Tuesday started screaming at me in front of several people from out of the office about how I was lying and that it was my fault and I had to go fix it. I just turned on my heel and walked out of the room.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 01:46 PM (VtjlW)

 

Good lord, you really have worked for some serious psychos.

Posted by: Insomniac at December 20, 2013 09:53 AM (DrWcr)

204 They had accidentally added
Catastrophic Bureaucratic Bungling and Malfeasance Coverage

Posted by: Beto at December 20, 2013 01:47 PM (MhA4j)


----


Hmmmmm..... I wonder if casualty providers could offer up a plan that would cover an individual financial losses from 404 Care incompetence and get away with not calling it Healthcare Insurance...... kinda like an "uninsured motorist" rider on your car insurance....

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 09:53 AM (nELVU)

205 You know who would have been really great with Breezy McBama giving a speech?

Just imagine there is a podium, and the scheduled start time is 2:00pm
And the nation watches this empty podium for about fifteen minutes.

And then Andrew Breitbart walks out, taps the mic....and begins to talk!

Oh if there really was a Santa Clause.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 09:53 AM (teMpq)

206 >>What are we going to be saying when it's up and running finally? Because it will be. And all this will be forgotten. The MSM will make sure of it. Gosh, my insurance is expensive. Why am I paying for maternity care? Damn, my doctor isn't in my new network. Holy shit, my deductible is now $5,000! etc.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 09:54 AM (g1DWB)

207 Oh look, almost noon EST, Obama should be at the podium any minute.....
I'm guessing he'll start about 12:33?

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:54 AM (ruxvM)

208 Healthcare.Gov down? Well you can bet the house michelle never went down

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 09:54 AM (t3UFN)

209 What are we going to be saying when it's up and running finally? Because it will be. And all this will be forgotten. The MSM will make sure of it. The website is just the clown show in the center ring. This is a three-ring circus, where the cancellations, price increases, doctor retirements, and network collapses go on continually.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:54 AM (MMC8r)

210 Last November, Pornhub offered to help with Healthcare website:

Makes sense, a lot of their customers have had a stroke or two.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at December 20, 2013 09:54 AM (4WhSY)

211 >>I'd like to see Rand Paul stride to the Senate floor for a speech about ObamaCare, laugh heartily for ten minutes into the microphone, then cede the floor. Followed by Ted Cruz saying, "I gave them the opportunity to delay this and they called me a terrorist." Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 01:51 PM (ruxvM)
That's more polite than my preference for Ted Cruz getting up and saying "Told you so, bitches!" and then doing a few victory laps around the floor followed by shoving a copy of the ACA down the front of his pants. You're welcome for that image.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 09:54 AM (VtjlW)

212 Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 01:54 PM (VtjlW)

I would pay good money to see that.

Posted by: GMan at December 20, 2013 09:56 AM (sxq57)

213 >>You're welcome for that image.

{{moves a plate of shortbread w/festive red and green sprinkles on top over to AtC}}

Perfection!

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 09:56 AM (ruxvM)

214 So, what's the over/under on how late Obammy is getting to the podium?   I'll take 30 mins

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 09:56 AM (4df7R)

215 What are we going to be saying when it's up and running finally?

----

"HOLEEE SHIT!!!!!  Look at the size of that deductible!!!!  Yet the in-network doctor list is sooo tiny."

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 09:56 AM (nELVU)

216 @jaketapper says reporters are wondering whether to ask about Duck Dynasty or Santa's race at WH press con. today.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (bCEmE)

217 Speaking of going down....Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws.

Nothing says respect for women like legal prostitution.

How do liberals keep their cognitive dissonance straight?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (QFxY5)

218 So, what's the over/under on how late Obammy is getting to the podium? I'll take 30 mins And delay his vacay?

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (MMC8r)

219 so obama is going to hawaii for Christmas? I 'm going to my kitchen

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (t3UFN)

220 221 So, what's the over/under on how late Obammy is getting to the podium? I'll take 30 mins

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at December 20, 2013 01:56 PM (4df7R)


Still selecting his shorts. You can't rush these things.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (RD7QR)

221

Last November, Pornhub offered to help with Healthcare website

 

Why not?  You're going to get screwed anyway.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (zF6Iw)

222 what is that Medical definition of a patient who play's in their feces? Coporophiliac or something like that. True story, my wife was in a changing room this last week where someone had smeared poop on the wall. She made a hasty exit and told the poor shop girl.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b] at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (A0glY)

223 Fox News revenue has gone up 350% since 2003. CNN has gone up about 35% MSNBC has gone up about 100% CNN also has much higher costs than Fox or MSNBC cause they operate so many more international bureaus.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (ZPrif)

224

What are we going to be saying when it's up and running finally? Because it will be. And all this will be forgotten. The MSM will make sure of it.

-

When the website works, the actual workings of the law won't, because they defy the laws of economics.

 

The entire thing is a    joke, inside a FUBAR, wrapped in a Mongolian Cluster- F#%#.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 09:57 AM (gJyfA)

225 How do liberals keep their cognitive dissonance straight? Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 20, 2013 01:57 PM (QFxY5) A little KY jelly and some viagra

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 09:58 AM (t3UFN)

226 223 @jaketapper says reporters are wondering whether to ask about Duck Dynasty or Santa's race at WH press con. today. Hard times call for SOFT NEWS!

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 09:58 AM (MMC8r)

227 "HOLEEE SHIT!!!!! Look at the size of that deductible!!!! Yet the in-network doctor list is sooo tiny." And looks suspiciously like the names were cribbed from an Islamabad, Pakistan phone book.

Posted by: Regular Moron [/i] at December 20, 2013 09:59 AM (6Nqkf)

228

Any guesses when Barky will show up for the 2pm presser? I would say after 3pm, but I know he has a plane to catch to Hawaii. So I would say he shows up only 22 minutes late.

 

Any takers? Over/under?

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 09:59 AM (+/C3g)

229 224 Speaking of going down....Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws. Considering what goes on in the back rooms of their strip clubs (the "Canadian Ballet" as we call them) they haven't been prosecuting prostitutes for a long time. I-I mean, I've HEARD about what goes on there. Just gossip. From the guys. In the neighborhood. Period.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 09:59 AM (7ObY1)

230 The entire thing is a joke, inside a FUBAR, wrapped in a Mongolian Cluster- F#%#. --- Fuck you Mongorians! You destroy my shitty wall!

Posted by: City Wok Proprietor at December 20, 2013 09:59 AM (/Crba)

231

Dang it, MWR! Beat me to it.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 09:59 AM (+/C3g)

232 Late

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 10:00 AM (t3UFN)

233 Considering what goes on in the back rooms of their strip clubs (the "Canadian Ballet" as we call them) they haven't been prosecuting prostitutes for a long time. I-I mean, I've HEARD about what goes on there. Just gossip. From the guys. In the neighborhood. Period. --- Fits with what I've heard about Canadian strippers in Windsor, Ont. Full-nude dancing and fairly grabby with the customers.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:00 AM (/Crba)

234 Is Barky flapping his law hole yet?

Posted by: toby928© Texan by birth, Moron by the grace of Ace at December 20, 2013 10:00 AM (QupBk)

235 Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws. Time for a run to Tim Horton's for a 'Winnepeg Cruller.'

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:01 AM (MMC8r)

236 241 Is Barky flapping his law hole yet? Posted by: toby928© Texan by birth, Moron by the grace of Ace at December 20, 2013 02:00 PM (QupBk) Not yet.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:01 AM (bCEmE)

237 Heeeeeeeeeeeer eeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeee's Shit. Late again.

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 10:01 AM (fWAjv)

238

Confucius say....  read thread before makey joke.

Posted by: eleven at December 20, 2013 10:01 AM (fsLdt)

239 Yeah, okay, 2:00, what about it? Press conference? Dude, I haven't chosen my board wax, the peons will just have to wait.

Posted by: President Kowabunga at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (RD7QR)

240 Speaking of going down....Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws. I lived in Ottawa for a little while. My apt was actually in a pretty nice neighborhood, just a block or two away from some really nice houses. This poor lady was always out by the street trying to hitchhike. For weeks nobody would give the poor woman a ride out of the neighborhood.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b] at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (A0glY)

241 Fits with what I've heard about Canadian strippers in Windsor, Ont. Full-nude dancing and fairly grabby with the customers. Yep. I'm near Fort Erie and Niagara Falls's clubs, but I've been to Windsor on business. I mean, I've HEARD about this. Not that I have any personal experience or anything. Swearsies.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (7ObY1)

242 >>@jaketapper says reporters are wondering whether to ask about Duck Dynasty or Santa's race at WH press con. today.

And they really believe their profession requires a degree?
They sound more like teenage bloggers. Check that. Teenage bloggers are probably more inquisitive that those bozos.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (ruxvM)

243 242 Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws. Time for a run to Tim Horton's for a 'Winnepeg Cruller.' --- There's an Idiocracy joke about Starbucks and handjobs just waiting to be made there...

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (/Crba)

244 As a card-carrying capitalist shill I've always scratched my head about laws that let you give a product away for free but not charge for it.

Posted by: Regular Moron [/i] at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (6Nqkf)

245 That's not an empty podium, it's an address by Obama's Website Czar.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:02 AM (MMC8r)

246 Thank you, Lizzy. *noms* Good lord, you really have worked for some serious psychos. Posted by: Insomniac at December 20, 2013 01:53 PM (DrWcr) Yeah, the old firm was run by psychos. Complete entitlement whore psychos. I absolutely believe there is a correlation between that attitude and their politics.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:03 AM (VtjlW)

247 Sssssssssssssssssssss...

Posted by: The Fuse on the Employer Mandate Bomb at December 20, 2013 10:03 AM (8ZskC)

248 255 Sssssssssssssssssssss... Posted by: The Fuse on the Employer Mandate Bomb at December 20, 2013 02:03 PM (8ZskC) --- *cue up Mission Impossible theme*

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:03 AM (/Crba)

249 252 As a card-carrying capitalist shill I've always scratched my head about laws that let you give a product away for free but not charge for it.

Posted by: Regular Moron at December 20, 2013 02:02 PM (6Nqkf)


Agree. It makes the little libertarian in my head go "Heh?"

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:04 AM (RD7QR)

250 Full-nude dancing and fairly grabby with the customers. If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.

Posted by: Red Green at December 20, 2013 10:04 AM (MMC8r)

251 @jaketapper says reporters are wondering whether to ask about Duck Dynasty or Santa's race at WH press con. today. You know what I would ask? Who ordered the stand-down of the rescue mission to Benghazi? This simple question never gets asked of the piehole-in-chief.

Posted by: toby928© Texan by birth, Moron by the grace of Ace at December 20, 2013 10:04 AM (QupBk)

252 Mr. Reid was hospitalized because he was feeling poorly. Posted by: Little boy named "Poorly".>>

Teenage Tweeters works.
Or Twerkers

Posted by: Buzzsaw at December 20, 2013 10:04 AM (tf9Ne)

253 People say that ObamaCare isn't working. I say it is. It's doing exactly what we knew it would do: Giving crappy service selling policies nobody wants at exorbitant prices to people who have no choice but to buy them. That's pretty much what all these government "service" bureaus do: The IRS, the DMV, VA, park service, etc. This is nothing new, and this will never change. There is nothing to "fix".

Posted by: Socratease at December 20, 2013 10:05 AM (3V4IJ)

254 I like the new thing they have up asking if you want a "one time" reminder of when it comes back up. Instead of the 4 times a news that it just came back up.

Posted by: UWP at December 20, 2013 10:05 AM (2hQRj)

255 Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws. Time for a run to Tim Horton's for a 'Winnepeg Cruller.' Get a Yukon Swoosie.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 10:05 AM (GjYxB)

256 On Friday, sources close to the Duck Dynasty Robertson family told E! Online that the family was “very serious” about ending the show if Phil Robertson’s suspension stood. The source said, “They’re an extremely tight-knit family and they’re not going to let this get in the way. [Phil] is the reason for their success – they’re not going to abandon him. They’re also not about to let anyone threaten their religious beliefs.” Breitbart: http://tinyurl.com/k4z4c7j

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:05 AM (bCEmE)

257 I'm late because TOTUS is doing stretching exercises in the green room.

Posted by: Barky O'Genius at December 20, 2013 10:05 AM (8ZskC)

258 260 copy paste fail

Posted by: Buzzsaw at December 20, 2013 10:05 AM (tf9Ne)

259

I was going to send Harry a card in the hospital, but Halmark doesn't have a

 "I hope you die you miserable fuck" card ...

Posted by: Mr.Knowitall at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (uJK1E)

260 Time for a run to Tim Horton's for a 'Winnepeg Cruller.' It's Winnipeg, Yanqui. How about a Regina Vagina? A Windsor Wet Willie? A Quebecois Quicky?

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (7ObY1)

261 How do liberals keep their cognitive dissonance straight?
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo

It's.  Always. Someone. Else's. Fault.
Drilled into the psyche of every leftie.

There is no ownership of disasters of the Left because they think good thoughts, say good things, and attack those who don't.

They don't judge. They are so non-judgemental that good is bad, and bad is good. It's 'science.' It's better-than-you. It's malignant narcissism.

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (H4Rpo)

262 264 On Friday, sources close to the Duck Dynasty Robertson family told E! Online that the family was “very serious” about ending the show if Phil Robertson’s suspension stood. The source said, “They’re an extremely tight-knit family and they’re not going to let this get in the way. [Phil] is the reason for their success – they’re not going to abandon him. They’re also not about to let anyone threaten their religious beliefs.” Breitbart: http://tinyurl.com/k4z4c7j --- Your move, A&E. I'm curious as to what non-competes are written into their contracts should they leave the show. They may not be allowed to have a reality show elsewhere, but who says that Phil can't have a show on Blaze where he does a sermon every week?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (/Crba)

263 Time for a run to Tim Horton's for a 'Winnepeg Cruller.'


Pfft. You haven't lived until you've had a Berliner.

Posted by: Zombie JFK at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (8ZskC)

264 Oh hey on the whole what comes next, I was reading an article yesterday that pointed out that none of your out of network payments count towards your deductible. So since networks are now incredibly restricted, that means if you travel, say, to go home for Christmas, and break your arm while out of town, your insurance won't cover it, you'll have to pay full for the treatment and you will still not have spent a penny towards your deductible. Aren't there places in Florida where the network coverage is pretty much only in the county, not even the whole state? Yeah, that's going to be aces when that goes into effect.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (VtjlW)

265 Posted by: Regular Moron at December 20, 2013 02:02 PM (6Nqkf)

No.

Since all sex is rape, women pay psychologically in "relationships" that do not require monetary compensation.

Posted by: Naomi Wolf at December 20, 2013 10:06 AM (QFxY5)

266 I hope the programmers that hosed the Stalincare site aren't working on the TelePrompter, or else we are in for a long wait, or a very interesting speech.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 10:07 AM (gJyfA)

267 Dang it, MWR! Beat me to it.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 01:59 PM (+/C3g)

 

Great minds think alike! 

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 10:07 AM (4df7R)

268 268 Time for a run to Tim Horton's for a 'Winnepeg Cruller.' It's Winnipeg, Yanqui. How about a Regina Vagina? A Windsor Wet Willie? A Quebecois Quicky? --- How about a Yellowknife Sheath?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:07 AM (/Crba)

269 http://canadiansexacts.org/

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:07 AM (MMC8r)

270 Pfft. You haven't lived until you've had a Berliner. Tell me about it.

Posted by: Zombie JFK in HELL at December 20, 2013 10:08 AM (7ObY1)

271 Posted by: Tami at December 20, 2013 02:05 PM (bCEmE)

Integrity.

Who knew?

Posted by: Naomi Wolf at December 20, 2013 10:08 AM (QFxY5)

272 Old King Clancy Reverse Rick Moranis Montreal Meatpie Saskatoon Totem Pole Musty Goaltender Sticky Flapjack Squatting Eskimo Five-Legged Caribou Newfoundland Lobster Trap Manitoba Milk Bag Two-Handed Zamboni Sneaky Snowplow Full Mountie Sloppy Dog Sled Halifax Fudge Badger Two Girls, One Stanley Cup Brown Icicle Frosty Mitten Job Montreal Petting Zoo Wet Ski Mask Edmonton Soiler Salty Prime Minister One-Tusked Walrus Northwest Passage http://canadiansexacts.org

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:08 AM (MMC8r)

273 Oh...HELL!

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 20, 2013 10:08 AM (QFxY5)

274 *smacks the Horde* Now I want Timbits. Actual Timbits, not whatever pervy interpretation all y'all would put on something wholesome and innocent like that. Oh! Look! Baby lambs!

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:08 AM (VtjlW)

275 Since all sex is rape, women pay psychologically in "relationships" that do not require monetary compensation.

Posted by: Naomi Wolf at December 20, 2013 02:06 PM (QFxY5)


You may return to your embroidery.

Posted by: Edward I Longshanks at December 20, 2013 10:08 AM (8ZskC)

276 Have the Petulant Purple Lips Of Doom begun to flap yet?
 
Enjoy your 17 day taxpayer funded vacation, dickweed. We've earned it.

Posted by: GnuBreed at December 20, 2013 10:09 AM (cHZB7)

277 gee 10 minutes late and counting- shocka

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 10:09 AM (t3UFN)

278 How about a Yellowknife Sheath? There's just got to be a way to work poutine into this. Thinking, thinking...

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:09 AM (7ObY1)

279 How about a Regina Vagina?
A Windsor Wet Willie?
A Quebecois Quicky?

----

a Yukon Yanker
a Manitoba Mauling
a Klondike Klamper

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:09 AM (nELVU)

280 179. Banhammer?

Posted by: Navypopojoe at December 20, 2013 10:10 AM (9cjF1)

281 286 gee 10 minutes late and counting- shocka

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 02:09 PM (t3UFN)


I've got $5 on 2:23.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:10 AM (RD7QR)

282

One wonders how many people know that these plans aren't eligible for a subsidy?

 

link: http://preview.tinyurl.com/m635hvw

Posted by: speedster1 at December 20, 2013 10:10 AM (v40Bj)

283 Yellowknife

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 02:07 PM (/Crba)

I did some business in Yellowknife and narrowly avoided having to go there.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 20, 2013 10:10 AM (QFxY5)

284 >>> They may not be allowed to have a reality show elsewhere, but who says that Phil can't have a show on Blaze where he does a sermon every week? Doesn't he have a hunting show called Buck Commander?

Posted by: fluffy at December 20, 2013 10:11 AM (Ua6T/)

285 Speaking of Barky's "deadlines", what's the over/under on how late he'll be starting the press availability?

Posted by: Solomon at December 20, 2013 10:11 AM (QDWM2)

286 #283 Now I want Timbits. We have them as part of today's office party. Still a lot left. Plus some Timmy Ho's filled muffins. Which are fantastic, I might add. Open up that USB port, I'll share...

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:11 AM (7ObY1)

287 179. Banhammer?

Posted by: Navypopojoe at December 20, 2013 02:10 PM (9cjF1)

179.....Thread winner?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 20, 2013 10:11 AM (QFxY5)

288 And the #1 Canadian Sex Act: Margaret Trudeau.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:12 AM (MMC8r)

289 297. Sigh I hate you all

Posted by: Navypopojoe at December 20, 2013 10:12 AM (9cjF1)

290 Being habitually late is a disgusting habit

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 10:12 AM (t3UFN)

291 298 And the #1 Canadian Sex Act: Margaret Trudeau. --- The #2 act is the Pam Anderson. You have two oversized boobs in front of you and get infected with Hep C.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:13 AM (/Crba)

292 289 >> 179. Banhammer?
 
Platinum subscription and a get out of the Barrel free card.

Posted by: GnuBreed at December 20, 2013 10:13 AM (cHZB7)

293 "300 Being habitually late is a disgusting habit" It's also a cheap way to signal one's superiority. You will wait for me, damn it.

Posted by: Lauren at December 20, 2013 10:13 AM (hFL/3)

294 And the #1 Canadian Sex Act:

Margaret Trudeau.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 02:12 PM (MMC8r)


----


Also known as the Dudley Do-Me.

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:14 AM (nELVU)

295 Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 02:12 PM (t3UFN)

And you are a dentist? You must hate half of your patients.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at December 20, 2013 10:14 AM (QFxY5)

296 We have them as part of today's office party. Still a lot left. Plus some Timmy Ho's filled muffins. Which are fantastic, I might add. Open up that USB port, I'll share... Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 02:11 PM (7ObY1) Thank you, BSR! *preemptively shinkicks BC for opening USB port comments* Anyone know why ace is batting around a Buzzfeed toy on twitter?

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:14 AM (VtjlW)

297

Being habitually late is a disgusting habit

-

It is a telltale sign of an inferiority complex.  Or Penis envy, one of the two.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 10:14 AM (gJyfA)

298 Oh! Look! Baby lambs!

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 02:08 PM (VtjlW)

 

Not my fault.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 10:14 AM (4df7R)

299 300 Being habitually late is a disgusting habit Posted by: Nevergiveup

Yep- it reveals a number of bad character traits.

Posted by: backhoe at December 20, 2013 10:14 AM (ULH4o)

300 So SCOAMF's excuse for not going to Gettysburg was because he was coding the website or something. But its totes fixed now cuz he's flying off to Hawaii, amirite?

Posted by: Schwalbe: The Me-262© at December 20, 2013 10:15 AM (9Bdcz)

301 The #2 act is the Pam Anderson.

You have two oversized boobs in front of you and get infected with Hep C


She's real popular at the Number Six dance.

Posted by: Taggart at December 20, 2013 10:15 AM (8ZskC)

302 Plus some Timmy Ho's filled muffins. Which are fantastic, I might add. I'll pass on the Ho's filled muffin.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 10:15 AM (GjYxB)

303 312 Plus some Timmy Ho's filled muffins. Which are fantastic, I might add. I'll pass on the Ho's filled muffin. --- Get on the HO TRAIN~!

Posted by: The Godfather at December 20, 2013 10:16 AM (/Crba)

304 It is a telltale sign of an inferiority complex. Or Penis envy, one of the two.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 02:14 PM (gJyfA)

 

That presents an interesting thought experiment.   Is it possible for Obammy to experience penis envy, since he does not in fact have a penis?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/i][/s][/u][/b] at December 20, 2013 10:16 AM (4df7R)

305 Being late on purpose works as a power tactic. Unfortunately.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 10:16 AM (ZPrif)

306 Captain Bullsh!t still hasn't shown up? He's got no respect for anybody, shows it every chance he gets. I can't stand to even look at his stupid mug and pointless hand gestures anymore.

Posted by: gp at December 20, 2013 10:16 AM (+Jpqc)

307 We need this 45 minute video converted to digital format in the next 15 minutes! What do you mean that is physically impossible, failure is not an option! In the early days of the Internet I played around with some program (so long ago I forget the name) that would seriously cut the time it took to convert a video -- by about a factor of five, iirc. But the output would clip the hell out of continuous speech or music. Probably not good for a deposition. Unless your client was guilty.

Posted by: Regular Moron [/i] at December 20, 2013 10:17 AM (6Nqkf)

308 1 "This is how every website starts. The liberals told me so."
Yeah, seems like every fucking time I try to order something from Amazon or sell something on eBay the damn sites are down.  Then my Sheltie dog comes along and whines, pointing to the ethernet connector pulled out of its wall socket again, because the little plastic thingy broke off years ago. 
Have they checked that?  My dog will work for food, by the way.

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at December 20, 2013 10:17 AM (6rLSO)

309 It is a telltale sign of an inferiority complex. Or Penis envy, one of the two.
Posted by: Vashta Nerada at December 20, 2013 02:14 PM (gJyfA)


It's actually passive-aggressive. He's saying that his time matters and yours doesn't and you'll just have to wait.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:17 AM (RD7QR)

310 Even when everybody knows you are doing it just to make yourself look important, it works. Even when they think you are an asshole for doing it. It's like flattery, in that it works even when you are obvious and ham-handed about it.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 10:18 AM (ZPrif)

311 That presents an interesting thought experiment. Is it possible for Obammy to experience penis envy, since he does not in fact have a penis?



I experience Ferrari envy and I don't have a Ferrari.  So, yes.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at December 20, 2013 10:18 AM (8ZskC)

312 Anybody on speech duty?

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 10:18 AM (fWAjv)

313 A moment in obama time must be 20 minutes

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 10:18 AM (t3UFN)

314 322 Anybody on speech duty?

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 02:18 PM (fWAjv)


Yeah, I got this, but I'm getting time and a half AND holiday pay, got it?

Posted by: TOTUS at December 20, 2013 10:19 AM (RD7QR)

315 The darker Mallards are always late to the party.

Posted by: QUACK BACK at December 20, 2013 10:19 AM (Cs2tJ)

316 He's on - my guess of a 12:33 start was wrong...

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:20 AM (ruxvM)

317 272 Oh hey on the whole what comes next, I was reading an article yesterday that pointed out that none of your out of network payments count towards your deductible. So since networks are now incredibly restricted, that means if you travel, say, to go home for Christmas, and break your arm while out of town, your insurance won't cover it, you'll have to pay full for the treatment and you will still not have spent a penny towards your deductible. Aren't there places in Florida where the network coverage is pretty much only in the county, not even the whole state? Yeah, that's going to be aces when that goes into effect. Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 02:06 PM (VtjlW) ---------------------------------- One of my best friends lives in Bristol VA/TN. She lives in VA but her doctor, her kids' pediatrician, and her dentist all are on the TN side. Screwed. There are going to be a LOT of people hurt by this, not just on state boundaries but county/city lines. It's insane.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at December 20, 2013 10:20 AM (dfYL9)

318 Gee listening to him, I better check my bank account to see if all that money he is talking about is in my account?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 10:21 AM (t3UFN)

319 If you had 20-minutes-late, please collect your winnings at the pay window.

Posted by: toby928© Texan by birth, Moron by the grace of Ace at December 20, 2013 10:21 AM (QupBk)

320 Higher paychecks for the middle class because Obamacare is holding costs down? He's not even trying anymore, just straight up lying.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 10:21 AM (g1DWB)

321 C'mon Joe Wilson!!!

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 10:21 AM (fWAjv)

322 Damn. Missed it by THAT MUCH.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:21 AM (RD7QR)

323 A moment in obama time must be 20 minutes

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 02:18 PM (t3UFN)


----


Time runs different to the Gods than it does for us mere mortals.

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:22 AM (nELVU)

324 Blame right wing negative chi.

Posted by: Talking Point #342/subtext at December 20, 2013 10:22 AM (guDmW)

325 OT- In the continuing story of "As Baton Rouge Disintegrates", the union for the Baton Rouge PD has attacked the people trying to form the new city of St. George by saying that the new city will cause a 20% force reduction for the BRPD. Considering that the BRPD currently does NO law enforcement within the area that would become St. George, I think they're making the point for the people of St. George that they're getting taxed twice so that they can pay for BRPD and BR Fire Department (no services given) as well as the East BR Parish Sheriff's Office and the St. George Fire District (services provided.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (/Crba)

326 Hah! I love it. Can this piece of government designed crap get any worse? I think it can. Well nighty night all, its 3:20 AM in China, I'm inebriated and have an early day tomorrow, so I must say "Wan An" to all the rons and ettes. Be safe kids. Try not to wreck the joint while I'm comatose (asleep).

Posted by: Judge_Roy_Bean at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (Oxi7U)

327 He's already on vacation, this is just something he's doing on the way out the door.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (RD7QR)

328 Wow.

Posted by: Guy who says Wow at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (fsLdt)

329 The endless stream of "wrong promises" and delusional representations of reality. We'll see how long I can keep this on.


And he's just working up to "suboptimal performance."

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (8ZskC)

330 Chinese Steel Production is a Great Leap Forward.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (MMC8r)

331 Keebler Elves working on the website again?

Or is Barky gonna tell us that the unicorn is bringing replacement parts for the server.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 10:23 AM (teMpq)

332 >>Time runs different to the Gods than it does for us mere mortals. He exists outside of on-time?

Posted by: Mama AJ at December 20, 2013 10:24 AM (SUKHu)

333 Even my speeches make more sense than this Obama guy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwMSQhTMrZs

Posted by: The Dictator from "Bananas" at December 20, 2013 10:24 AM (cUbs5)

334 343 Keebler Elves working on the website again? --- Anyone else want to see Stacy Kiebler in an Elf costume showing lots of leg right now?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:24 AM (/Crba)

335 Off for 17 days in Hawaii bitches! Baraka

Posted by: steevy at December 20, 2013 10:24 AM (zqvg6)

336 In the early days of the Internet I played around with some program (so long ago I forget the name) that would seriously cut the time it took to convert a video -- by about a factor of five, iirc. But the output would clip the hell out of continuous speech or music. Probably not good for a deposition. Unless your client was guilty. Posted by: Regular Moron at December 20, 2013 02:17 PM (6Nqkf) Hand to God, the idiot who handed me that told me to hit fast forward when capturing the video and that would work. This was said to me complete with eye roll and in the duh tone of voice.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:25 AM (VtjlW)

337 Let me be clear. Nobody is more upset about having to show up at an Obama press conference than I am.

Posted by: Barky O'Genius at December 20, 2013 10:25 AM (8ZskC)

338 The web site would have been fine if it weren't for those meddling conservatives sticking food 'n booze in their USB ports.

Posted by: Obamba at December 20, 2013 10:25 AM (SUKHu)

339 >>> Keebler Elves working on the website again? Mmmm! Fudge stripes...

Posted by: fluffy at December 20, 2013 10:25 AM (Ua6T/)

340 ACA = Big savings for businesses. And so it begins. That's not a lie. Businesses will stop underwriting the cost of part-time employees and tell them to visit 404Care and save $2,500 like the JEF promised. I was talking to someone last week who works part-time that already got the notification for next year.

Posted by: Regular Moron [/i] at December 20, 2013 10:25 AM (6Nqkf)

341 No, seriously, he didn't blame sequester, did he?

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:26 AM (RD7QR)

342 One of my best friends lives in Bristol VA/TN. She lives in VA but her doctor, her kids' pediatrician, and her dentist all are on the TN side. Screwed. There are going to be a LOT of people hurt by this, not just on state boundaries but county/city lines. It's insane. Texarkana, Tx & Texarkana, Ar will be the same way then. There's a reason the main street is named State Line Avenue.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 10:26 AM (GjYxB)

343 I blame this on those H8ters at Duck Dynasty.

Posted by: Barney's wife at December 20, 2013 10:26 AM (0FSuD)

344 So ... what's is Prez Fucktard saying now?

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 10:26 AM (ZPrif)

345 Mmmm! Fudge stripes...

Posted by: fluffy at December 20, 2013 02:25 PM (Ua6T/)

 

I wove fudge stwipes!

Posted by: Bawney Fwank at December 20, 2013 10:26 AM (DrWcr)

346 Don't be cuttin' my OCare, homies! It's total rad! Later, gators, goin' beachin!

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:26 AM (MMC8r)

347 Doe his eyes look weird, like maybe his pupils are dilated?
Maybe it's just my PC....

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:27 AM (ruxvM)

348 "Jay prepared a list of who's naughty and who's nice." Guess Ed Henry won't get to ask any questions....

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:27 AM (bCEmE)

349 "Anyone else want to see Stacy Kiebler in an Elf costume showing lots of leg right now?"

*waves furiously*

Me...me..me

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 10:27 AM (teMpq)

350 The web site would have been fine if it weren't for those meddling conservatives sticking food 'n booze in their USB ports.

Posted by: Obamba at December 20, 2013 02:25 PM (SUKHu)


-----


..... an you think you've got problems.

Posted by: The Toaster at December 20, 2013 10:27 AM (nELVU)

351 Can we suck your dick now, sir?

Posted by: The MSM at December 20, 2013 10:27 AM (MMC8r)

352 359 Doe his eyes look weird, like maybe his pupils are dilated? Maybe it's just my PC.... --- Well, JFK's handlers WOULD give him amphetamines before sending him out to talk to people. It bit them in the ass when Kruschev delayed a meeting with him and the drugs were wearing off by the time they faced each other.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:28 AM (/Crba)

353 in·come ˈinˌkəm,ˈiNG-/Submit noun 1. money received, esp. on a regular basis, for work or through investments --- I didn't think they changed what that meant.

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 10:28 AM (fWAjv)

354 Dude looks tired.

Posted by: redenzo at December 20, 2013 10:28 AM (DG1Fm)

355 Figure 5 questions and he runs out the clock

Posted by: SamIam at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (FKt6g)

356 224 Speaking of going down....Canada just struck down all of its anti-prostitution laws. Niagara falls here we come!

Posted by: Boy's in the Hood at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (0FSuD)

357 366 Dude looks tired.

Posted by: redenzo at December 20, 2013 02:28 PM (DG1Fm)


Dicking the American people on a daily basis will do that to you.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (RD7QR)

358 I cannot find "poised to be covered" in my health plan.

Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (Sptt8)

359 For the children.

Posted by: redenzo at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (DG1Fm)

360 took credit 2x now for the oil/gas boom

Posted by: SamIam at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (FKt6g)

361 Blah blah blah blah Republican obstructionism blah blah blah blah blah nobody is angrier blah blah blah blah Bush economic policies blah blah blah blah middle class blah blah blah blah

Posted by: Barky O'Genius at December 20, 2013 10:29 AM (8ZskC)

362 One of my best friends lives in Bristol VA/TN. She lives in VA but her doctor, her kids' pediatrician, and her dentist all are on the TN side. Screwed. There are going to be a LOT of people hurt by this, not just on state boundaries but county/city lines. It's insane. Texarkana, Tx & Texarkana, Ar will be the same way then. There's a reason the main street is named State Line Avenue. Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 02:26 PM (GjYxB) The article was discussing how badly this is going to impact snow birds. It was a retired couple with a house in upstate NY and one in SC. They came to SC in the fall and winter because they both have arthritis and it's better for them. They've never had a problem with any of the doctors in SC accepting their NY insurance. Well, that's gone. So now they're going to sell the SC home because they can't afford to pay all of the out of pocket and the deductible and their primary doctors are in NY. You know what wasn't mentioned in the article? The tax that's going to be levied on them when they sell the second home. There's another lovely little ticking time bomb.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:30 AM (VtjlW)

363 "Doe his eyes look weird, like maybe his pupils are dilated?"

Gettin' his choom on in preparation for his 3 week Hawaiian vacay.  It's gonna be just like the good old days, but with better quality stuff.

Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 10:30 AM (4I3Uo)

364 "We're producing more oil and natural gas in this country than we've ever produced." Private land, dickwad....private land.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:30 AM (bCEmE)

365 This makes me think of the address President Merkin Muffley gave the American people before going off to his 'vacation' in the deep mines.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:30 AM (MMC8r)

366 can't listen anymore or I will hurt myself

Posted by: Nevergiveup at December 20, 2013 10:30 AM (t3UFN)

367 "some folks"

"There are some who would say"

"For the middle class"


How am I doing?

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (teMpq)

368 I cannot find "poised to be covered" in my health plan.

Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 02:29 PM (Sptt


----


..... look under "in shit".

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (nELVU)

369 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a malignant traitor.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (PYAXX)

370 Any members of the press ask if they can have his baby yet?

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (7ObY1)

371 Mmmmm... Pollo Mole.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (PYAXX)

372 took credit 2x now for the oil/gas boom The BALLS ON THIS GUY!

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (MMC8r)

373 >>Anyone else want to see Stacy Kiebler in an Elf costume showing lots of leg right now? http://tinyurl.com/nnga7lg

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 10:31 AM (g1DWB)

374 Okay... I've been at lunch, and I"m not reading through 400 comments. Reader's Digest version?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:32 AM (PYAXX)

375 "Millions will have healthcare on January 1st." 10's of millions won't.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:32 AM (bCEmE)

376 Okay... I've been at lunch, and I"m not reading through 400 comments. Reader's Digest version? Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:32 PM (PYAXX) Timbits are awesome.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:32 AM (VtjlW)

377 386 >>Anyone else want to see Stacy Kiebler in an Elf costume showing lots of leg right now? http://tinyurl.com/nnga7lg --- Thank you. Bunk.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:32 AM (/Crba)

378 OK, that female reporter has totes missed the point, eh?

Why is she asking him about his poll numbers when the reason his poll numbers are down is because his Obamacare baby is a failure that is leaving sick people without health coverage, jobs/hours cut back, etc.?
Who cares how it affects him?

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (ruxvM)

379

 "We're producing more oil and natural gas in this country than we've ever produced."

 

So why's gas still $3.50/gallon at the pump, fuckface?

Posted by: Insomniac at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (DrWcr)

380 Timbits are awesome. I have never had a Timbit.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (PYAXX)

381 Reader's Digest version?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:32 PM (PYAXX)


-----


We're boned.

Canada's got the best pussy money can buy.

Some assholes on TV before leaving for Hawaii.

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (nELVU)

382 We were all talking about your blog.

Posted by: eleven at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (fsLdt)

383 ewww... Prezzy Skezzy just threw Orange John Boehner, under the bus... 'commitment to move immigration reform forward next year'

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (lZBBB)

384 You wingnuts just won't let the poor man be clear.

Posted by: Ian S. at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (B/VB5)

385 Niagara falls here we come! Mints Gentlemen's Club Just sayin'. http://www.mintsstripbar.com/

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (7ObY1)

386 I can only assume Barky is going to wait till the end of his speech to call for nationalization of toilet paper factories and to declare a change from a bicameral legislature to a national assembly under his "I can't wait on Congress to act" powers.

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (eo3Zc)

387 Ya know, I think that Obama truly believes that the only problem with Obamacare is that the web site doesn't work.

Posted by: Anachronda at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (U82Km)

388 Readers Digest Version: The SCOAMTT is a SCOAMTTY SCOAMTT SCOAMTT SCOAMTT.

Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (Sptt8)

389 Okay... I've been at lunch, and I"m not reading through 400 comments.

Reader's Digest version?
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:32 PM (PYAXX)


These cocksuckers are keeping me from my vacation.

Posted by: President Bitchin' Tubes at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (RD7QR)

390 "Millions will have healthcare on January 1st."


Or dozens.  A guy who doesn't know the difference between a billion and a trillion isn't too good at math.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at December 20, 2013 10:33 AM (8ZskC)

391 NSA question now.... "Judge says NSA has failed to site a single case of the collection of the metadata stopping a terrorist attack."

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:34 AM (bCEmE)

392 "'Right now HealthCare.gov is queuing consumers,' Peters said."

Ahahahaha! The new HTTP RFC guidelines are now:

You MAY use the statement "Queuing Consumers" and return a 200 OK response header and webpage instead of returning a 501 Not Implemented status code error.

We're not out of business; we're queuing future consumers.

Good thing the White House brought in all those top-level advisers on internet tech.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at December 20, 2013 10:34 AM (eHIJJ)

393 JackStraw

You are a giver my man.
Thank yew.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at December 20, 2013 10:34 AM (teMpq)

394 Reader's Digest version?

Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure/tyrant.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at December 20, 2013 10:34 AM (ZKzrr)

395

Anyone else want to see Stacy Kiebler in an Elf costume showing lots of leg right now?

http://tinyurl.com/nnga7lg

I'd be willing to taste her E. L. Fudge.

Posted by: Insomniac at December 20, 2013 10:34 AM (DrWcr)

396 Who cares how it affects him? Remember ace's post about the "McGuffinization of American Politics?" Yeah. That.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:34 AM (PYAXX)

397 I think you mis-heard him. He didn't say "millions" will have insurance. It was, "minions" will have insurance.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at December 20, 2013 10:35 AM (N/Sup)

398 Camera pans down and catches ap reporter shining obamas shoes.

Posted by: redenzo at December 20, 2013 10:35 AM (DG1Fm)

399 411 I think you mis-heard him. He didn't say "millions" will have insurance. It was, "minions" will have insurance. --- Hey, I provide full benefits to MY minions.

Posted by: Gru at December 20, 2013 10:35 AM (/Crba)

400 412 Camera pans down and catches ap reporter shining obamas shoes. Posted by: redenzo at December 20, 2013 02:35 PM (DG1Fm) That ain't his shoes he's 'shining'.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:35 AM (bCEmE)

401 I saw Queuing Consumers open for Scritti Politti at Deer Creek Amphitheater.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (ZKzrr)

402 Note.... the first question was about... How do you feel... Not about... what the F did you do...

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (lZBBB)

403 Homeboy coming home! wahoo. I got some hot Blondes that look like that scandi for you and some dynamite weed. Can't wait! http://tinyurl.com/7vmc7ct

Posted by: Robert “Bobby” Titcomb at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (0FSuD)

404 I have never had a Timbit. Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:33 PM (PYAXX) If I had some, I would give you some. But I don't have any. *hides crumbs around USB port*

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Mmmm. Blondies with whipped cream. at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (VtjlW)

405 I'd love to see a ticker on Fox showing real time counts of people who have successfully signed up for SCOAMTTcare, been added to Medicaid and support Uncle Si.

Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (Sptt8)

406 Does body man Reggie make the trip to Hawaii?

Posted by: Just askin' at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (l3RZ9)

407 "'Right now HealthCare.gov is queuing consumers,' Peters said."



Hah. It took the Obama Administration to bring 1960s Soviet toilet paper distribution practices to the internet age.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (8ZskC)

408 Right now HealthCare.gov is queuing consumers,' Peters said." **** Once again, the audio quality must be way off. What he said was healthcare.gov is "screwing" consumers.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (N/Sup)

409 "We're producing more oil and natural gas in this country than we've ever produced." And it is all because of fracking and exploration on private land that you have been fighting against in court, tooth and nail the whole way.

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:36 AM (i2C8K)

410 Barky's blinking a whole lot while trying to defend the NSA program. Good thing that's not a sign of anything.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 10:37 AM (+/C3g)

411 "Obama administration officials have firmly insisted there's no reason for any concern regarding the website's security."

Go ahead Charlie Brown. I promise I won't pull the football.

Posted by: Lucy Obama at December 20, 2013 10:37 AM (eHIJJ)

412 401 Ya know, I think that Obama truly believes that the only problem with Obamacare is that the web site doesn't work.

Posted by: Anachronda

I keep saying the "man" is a dunce. I honestly believe he is. Slow.

Posted by: backhoe at December 20, 2013 10:37 AM (ULH4o)

413 The website and the NSA acted inappropriately. Boosh's fault.

Posted by: Barry, Chom leader at December 20, 2013 10:37 AM (0FSuD)

414 Barky's blinking a whole lot while trying to defend the NSA program. Good thing that's not a sign of anything. What? You're not suggesting the President is a liar, are you?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:38 AM (PYAXX)

415 Lie *QUACK* more lies *QUACK*

Posted by: QUACK BACK at December 20, 2013 10:38 AM (Cs2tJ)

416 387 Okay... I've been at lunch, and I"m not reading through 400 comments. Reader's Digest version? Barry stick sucks. That is all.

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:38 AM (0FSuD)

417 Did someone say "Timbits"?

http://is.gd/OkXXIp

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at December 20, 2013 10:38 AM (ZKzrr)

418 Our economy is doing great! But times are tough, so shame on you sorry guys for not extending unemployment insurance!

Posted by: Off-to-Hawaii Obama at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (X866z)

419 He just talks and talks and talks and talks and says absolutely nothing. He is a master of bullshit.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (g1DWB)

420 429 Barky's blinking a whole lot while trying to defend the NSA program. Good thing that's not a sign of anything. What? You're not suggesting the President is a liar, are you? --- Is the pattern "...---..."?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (/Crba)

421 I bet 10 times more people visited the Duck Commander website in the last 24 hours than visited Healthcare.gov

Posted by: Dave in Fla at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (xZQaE)

422 Go ed go.

Posted by: redenzo at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (DG1Fm)

423 Barky's blinking a whole lot while trying to defend the NSA program. Good thing that's not a sign of anything. Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 02:37 PM (+/C3g) ***** Fake sign language guy...meet fake Morse code guy.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (N/Sup)

424 Okay... I've been at lunch, and I"m not reading through 400 comments. Reader's Digest version? Posted by: AllenG Timbits are awesome. Posted by: alexthechick Ho's filled muffins not so much.

Posted by: rickb223 at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (GjYxB)

425 Ed Henry continuing with the NSA line of questioning....

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (bCEmE)

426 At this moment Joe Biden and a crack team of experts are working feverishly with paste and construction paper to get Healthcare.gov up and ready for the big year-end surge.

Posted by: Barky O'Genius at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (8ZskC)

427

What? You're not suggesting the President is a liar, are you?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:38 PM (PYAXX)

 

I have no idea what you are talking about. I mean, that's just a sign that he needs some Visine. Seriously, you guys.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (+/C3g)

428 Obama administration officials have firmly insisted there's no reason for any concern regarding the website's security.

----

Thats a TRUE statement.

So is THIS one: 

The IT Project People have firmly insisted there is ample reason for concern regarding the website's security.

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:39 AM (nELVU)

429 I bet 10 times more people visited the Duck Commander website in the last 24 hours than visited Healthcare.gov Well, that stands to reason. The Duck Commander website works, and has something people want.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:40 AM (PYAXX)

430 "So why's gas still $3.50/gallon at the pump, fuckface?"


That's actually a heady brew of ridiculous federal and state taxes,  recouping of high  regulatory costs by the oil companies,  collusion amongst the suppliers (read OPEC), and, most importantly, the fact that we've  proven  over and over again that we'll  grumble about high prices but we'll still buy the product in great quantity.  Why would they  ever drop it?

Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 10:40 AM (4I3Uo)

431 ""I think what's been interesting about this whole [NSA] exercise is..."

He doe know that he's not a character on The West WIng or playing Model U.N., right? Geez, could he be more dismissive?

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:40 AM (ruxvM)

432 Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:32 PM (PYAXX)

We're all kcufed, Obama's a dick and late to his speech and now he's doing his megalomaniac narcissist thing with the Presstitutes.

And Canada is now called WhoreLand.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:40 AM (LSDdO)

433 Actually, that statement was misreported. It's not "queuing"... it's "cueing." And we all know how painful that can be. Just ask The Chicken.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at December 20, 2013 10:40 AM (eHIJJ)

434 Barky's blinking a whole lot while trying to defend the NSA program. Good thing that's not a sign of anything. 'v..l..a..d..i..m..i..r........m...i..s..s..i..o..n......a..c..c..o..m..p..l..i..s..h..e..d'

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:41 AM (MMC8r)

435 Moar coffee.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:41 AM (RD7QR)

436 Everything that guy just said is bullshit.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:41 AM (bCEmE)

437 448 Actually, that statement was misreported. It's not "queuing"... it's "cueing." And we all know how painful that can be. Just ask The Chicken. --- Isn't "cue" French for something?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:42 AM (/Crba)

438 Did he say that the FISA court doesn't think that the NSA information won't be misused in the future? Really? The FISA court is in charge of the future?

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:42 AM (ai76/)

439 Everything that guy just said is bullshit. Is he done? Or will more organic fertilizer be forthcoming?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:42 AM (PYAXX)

440 451 Everything that guy just said is bullshit. --- Mr. Gambini's entire opening statement is to be stricken from the record, except "thank you".

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:42 AM (/Crba)

441 436 I bet 10 times more people visited the Duck Commander website in the last 24 hours than visited Healthcare.gov Well it works. http://tinyurl.com/kugecbd

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:42 AM (0FSuD)

442 Is he done? Or will more organic fertilizer be forthcoming? Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 02:42 PM (PYAXX) No he's not done...I was just avoiding the rush.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:42 AM (bCEmE)

443 Only 3 more insurance shopping days left.

Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at December 20, 2013 10:43 AM (V70Uh)

444 Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 02:39 PM (nELVU) Its also a fact that if a Commercial company gets hacked, they are legally required to tell you your data was at risk. The Government does not have to do so.

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 20, 2013 10:43 AM (lZBBB)

445 Guess what Pajamaboy is doing down in the basement right now.

Posted by: UWP at December 20, 2013 10:43 AM (2hQRj)

446 Are we through the news cycle yet?

Posted by: Barry S.[/i] at December 20, 2013 10:43 AM (klzyR)

447 Is President Face-Tumor still talking?

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at December 20, 2013 10:43 AM (ZPrif)

448 Nice, Clapper gets a slap down.

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:44 AM (0FSuD)

449 Ed Henry is bringing it. At least there is one actual journalist in the room.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 10:44 AM (g1DWB)

450 The Democrat Party is now forwarding all personal information entered on healthcare.gov to illegal aliens to establish new identities.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:44 AM (MMC8r)

451 The word is "queueing", not "queuing."


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (V70Uh)

452 Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 02:42 PM (/Crba) Cue cue cuew.....

Posted by: Sheriff Roscoe P. Coaltrain at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (lZBBB)

453 Barky saying

"We're producing more oil and natural gas in this country than we've ever produced."

=A Police Chief saying "Crime is at an all time high"

Posted by: Buzzsaw at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (tf9Ne)

454 If there is one thing the Obama Administration is known for it's security leaks.  Why would a dopey, pet-project website be any different for these clowns?

To most of them, security means guarding against the shame of incontinence in public thru wardrobe tricks and buttplugs.  But mostly buttplugs.

Posted by: Fritz at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (UzPAd)

455 461 Guess what Pajamaboy is doing down in the basement right now. You don't need to know, let's just say he's learning about a new kind of "chocolate"

Posted by: Barney at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (0FSuD)

456 He's running out the clock...going on and on and on about NSA.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (bCEmE)

457 Only 3 more insurance shopping days left. And I'll point out its not that many, not really. The SCOAMT can decree whatever he wants. People who have waited until now won't have coverage on 1/1. They may have coverage "dated" 1/1, but "Verification of Insurance Coverage" on 1/1 will come back as "not covered."

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (PYAXX)

458 "...there had not been evidence and there continues to not be evidence..."

cue Bart Simpson: "You can't prove it was me"

Posted by: Anachronda at December 20, 2013 10:45 AM (U82Km)

459 >>The Democrat Party is now forwarding all personal information entered on healthcare.gov to illegal aliens to establish new identities.

Que? This is our job!

Posted by: Obamacare Navigators - Enroll America, ACORN, La Raza, Planned Parenthood at December 20, 2013 10:46 AM (ruxvM)

460 466 The Democrat Party is now forwarding all personal information entered on healthcare.gov to illegal aliens to establish new identities. --- How many of them will be using the name Donald R. De Cicco?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 10:46 AM (/Crba)

461 "Right now HealthCare.gov is barbe-queuing consumers," Fixed for truth.

Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 10:46 AM (MMC8r)

462 Oh my....he just said 'There may be another way of skinning the cat.' I thought he liked dog?

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:46 AM (bCEmE)

463 "We're producing more oil and natural gas in this country than we've ever produced." =A Police Chief saying "Crime is at an all time high" At the very least it would be like the Mayor of Gotham City taking credit for the reduced crime-rate.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:46 AM (PYAXX)

464 Posted by: --- at December 20, 2013 02:44 PM (MMC8r)

In a way that's what they're trying to do; give the country an new electorate implant.

One that will vote the way they want them to and shut up.

Oh and who don't own any guns. (well except for the Mexican cartels but Eric know who has those to it's totes okay)

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:46 AM (LSDdO)

465 461 Guess what Pajamaboy is doing down in the basement right now. I'm playing with my My Little Ponies till Mommy gets home from work. I'm not supposed to open the door or talk to any strangers.

Posted by: Ethan Krupp at December 20, 2013 10:47 AM (7ObY1)

466 Brandon In Baton Rouge: "Isn't 'cue' French for something?"

When spoken by Obama, I believe the preceding "fu" is understood. So, yes, as French as John Kerry.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at December 20, 2013 10:47 AM (eHIJJ)

467 Throw that softball over the plate and I will give you a reach around later, thanks

Posted by: Barry, Chom leader at December 20, 2013 10:47 AM (0FSuD)

468 Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 02:42 PM (/Crba) PETA outrageously outraged in... 5... 4... oh wait... it was the Precedent.... never mind...

Posted by: Romeo13 at December 20, 2013 10:47 AM (lZBBB)

469 So to paraphrase: He now speculates that there must be some way to make people feel safe and forget the whole NSA thing.

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:47 AM (R7B1m)

470 Jeebus.  Just turned on the TV and there's a braying jackass on.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:48 AM (lVPtV)

471 I believe the SCOAMTT's method is to drone on in an annoying monotone to turn off brains. Folks.

Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 10:48 AM (Sptt8)

472 How many of them will be using the name Donald R. De Cicco?

Posted by: Brandon in Baton Rouge at December 20, 2013 02:46 PM (/Crba)


-----


About half the number of Heywood Jablowme's.

Posted by: fixerupper at December 20, 2013 10:48 AM (nELVU)

473 I'm in charge so we screwed up. Incredible. He is incapable of accepting any blame for anything.

Posted by: JackStraw at December 20, 2013 10:48 AM (g1DWB)

474 This guy should never give a presser. Every time he does more people realize what a fucking light weight he is. Thanks LIVs

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:48 AM (0FSuD)

475 Ohhh...just got a jab at Ed Henry because Fox.

How many times has this bastard said "I?"

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (lVPtV)

476

I...

I...

I...

I...


Posted by: LoneStarHeeb at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (BZAd3)

477 Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 02:48 PM (Sptt Wait.... autohypnosis? Is he part of the Magicians Union? Who taught him that???

Posted by: Svengali the Great at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (lZBBB)

478 "We're poised to do really good things." What an orator he is!

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (bCEmE)

479 Poised!

Posted by: weew at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (0tmLY)

480 I remember Nixon vividly. If he had come out and talked like this they would have rushed the podium, given him a wedgie and then beat the crap out of him.

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (1ZdDv)

481 TFG thinks you're stupid. Well, based on his re-election, he's right about more than 50% of the population.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (PYAXX)

482 I am posed to get fucked. I just need to get to Costa Rica and have that 100 bill.

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (0FSuD)

483 No one's as mad about this as I am.

Posted by: Braying Jackass at December 20, 2013 10:49 AM (V70Uh)

484 Oh, GOP shut down!

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:50 AM (0FSuD)

485 So basically:

Reporters: What are you doing about your poll numbers? Especially regarding Obamacare and the NSA.

Obama: We've been analyzing, and studying, and asking ourselves if we are providing enough assurance that we're operating within our ideas of civil liberties and stuff.
Oh, and we're poised to do really good things.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:50 AM (ruxvM)

486 Shorter TFG:  "I"

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:50 AM (lVPtV)

487 "We're poised..." one can tear a muscle being poised for so long.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at December 20, 2013 10:50 AM (ojnk6)

488 He's as posed as a ballet dance that's realized they're about to shit their pants. On stage.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (LSDdO)

489 "The end of the year is always a good time to reflect and see how you can do things better." Have you EVER heard such pure pearls of wisdom?! I mean....genius.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (bCEmE)

490 He is poised to get stoned (more than he is now).

Posted by: Ma Bell at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (RLdcX)

491 Don't look at me. I'm already in Hawaii.

Posted by: TOTUS at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (eHIJJ)

492 He only wishes all the folks were as poised as he.

Posted by: Justamom at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (Sptt8)

493 "I'll have better ideas after a couple of days of sleep and sun."

Fucking fucker.  How is that any different than every other day for the asshole?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (lVPtV)

494 Government websites that crash right before POTUS news conferences are racist.

Posted by: ULTRAMARINE at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (yhJhK)

495 I bet he is wearing a Poise pad right now.


Posted by: Grampa Jimbo at December 20, 2013 10:51 AM (V70Uh)

496 Posted by: The Obsidian Owl at December 20, 2013 02:50 PM (tWmgi) And today's show was brought to you by the word of the Day.... poised... And the Letter Q, and number I.....

Posted by: Sesame Street at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (lZBBB)

497 Yeah, I'm poised to win the lottery. Poised. No need to even buy a ticket.

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (RD7QR)

498 And OMG he just used the word 'poised' again. Obviously it focus-grouped better than "we're fixin' to." This is freaking ridiculuous and should be lampooned at every opportunity. Sure we're "poised" to get people insurance, or for massive economic growth, or whatever. "Poised" sounds active while being passive. Much like this whole Presidency, really.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (PYAXX)

499 I couldn't hate the worthless fuck more if I tried.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (lVPtV)

500 Brianna Keilar: "Mr President, can you please tell us how much the Republicans suck?"

Posted by: weew at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (0tmLY)

501 I am bipartisan, you do what I say, that's bipartisan. Got that?

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (0FSuD)

502 The ObamaCare website was built by white people to make Obama look bad, because racism.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (LSDdO)

503 What a dope Drew is.

Dopes and Meatballs being run by an Ewok.

Still better than TFG.

Posted by: DaveA[/i][/b][/s] at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (DL2i+)

504

"The end of the year is always a good time to reflect and see how you can do things better."

 

Sounds like the coach of a shitty team who knows he won't be fired.

Posted by: eleven at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (fsLdt)

505 I saw The Magician's Union open for Uriah Heep, Shea's Buffalo Theater, 1974. You could hardly see the stage through all the mari-ja-wanna smoke.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 10:52 AM (7ObY1)

506 Is this guy Canadian? Count the eh's

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (0FSuD)

507 Man those Duck Dynasty guys are quacking me up.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (N/Sup)

508 Oh, and we're poised to do really good things.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 02:50 PM (ruxvM)

 

Ask me what happens when they say they're "poised."  Go on, ask me.

Posted by: The Chicken at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (DrWcr)

509 ♪ Dont mean nuthin..... but a good time.

How can I resi-ssssst ♫

Posted by: Poised Un at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (nELVU)

510

>>>461 Guess what Pajamaboy is doing down in the basement right now.

 

"It all started when James Carville was lookin' at me during a Democrat meetup in Seattle, and he turned to Bill Clinton and said "See, I can even get *that* kid laid" and Bill started turning red and laughing? Anyway, they took some fairly high-stakes bets and next thing you know I'm posing in some PJs after they doped me up with cough remedies. Did it work? Hellz yes, these Obamabot girls might be ugly, but they are blowing up my cell. Thanks, Snakehead! And sorry, Bill."

Posted by: Bigby's Knuckle Sammich at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (3ZtZW)

511

History will treat this idiot far more compassionately than he will ever deserve.  And that makes me think that history is a lot like climate science. 

Talk about losing your blissful ignorance...

Posted by: LoneStarHeeb at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (BZAd3)

512 It's Complicated. These are complex and difficult problems.
Thanks Pres. McGenius. Unbelievable.

Maybe you should have thought about it before you f'd with everybody's insurance A - hole.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (MaP11)

513 "I'll have better ideas after a couple of days of sleep and sun."


Oh come on, he didn't REALLY say that, right? RIGHT?!?

Posted by: joncelli at December 20, 2013 10:53 AM (RD7QR)

514 I bet that's what Poland said in 1939 "we're poised to sign a treaty with Germany".

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:54 AM (LSDdO)

515 Nood thread up.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at December 20, 2013 10:54 AM (+/C3g)

516 526 Is this guy Canadian? Count the eh's Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 02:53 PM (0FSuD) ***** Except Canadians use the 'eh' as an exclamation point. He uses it as a semicolon or comma. Big difference.

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at December 20, 2013 10:54 AM (N/Sup)

517 I wonder if Mooch and the girls have already left for Hawaii?  It would be typical of these grifters if she couldn't wait an hour for him to do his stupid presser.  TFG can fly out with the two dogs (unless he gets hungry).

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:54 AM (lVPtV)

518 Great, spit in the face of the GOP before the holidays and expect them to roll over. What a fucking cheap shot.

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 10:54 AM (0FSuD)

519 518 And OMG he just used the word 'poised' again.

Obviously it focus-grouped better than "we're fixin' to."

The problem with "fixin'" is that it reminds people that it's broke.

Posted by: Anachronda at December 20, 2013 10:54 AM (U82Km)

520 Oh for fuck's sake? New Year's resolution?

Posted by: jakeman at December 20, 2013 10:55 AM (vH4YP)

521 Or the Japanese in 1941 "We're poised to deliver some American scrap metal we don't need to Pearl Harbor"

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:55 AM (LSDdO)

522 "My New Year's resolution is to be nicer than the WH press corps."



That ought to go over well.  Not.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:55 AM (lVPtV)

523 "What is your New Year's resolution?" Hard hitting journalism, right fuckin' there. Answer: "My NY Resolution is to be nicer to the WH press corps."

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 10:55 AM (bCEmE)

524 "The end of the year is always a good time to reflect and see how you can do things better."

So we can expect lots of posing in front of a mirror just as always?

Yes, this is a serious man.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at December 20, 2013 10:55 AM (eHIJJ)

525 I'm not going to negotiate on the debt ceiling because it is only raised to pay bills congress ran up. I have some good ideas about how congress should do their jobs though. Because I'm really smart and in charge and shit.

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:55 AM (CteMY)

526 Oh goody, another "can't comment on an open investigation" dodge. That one never gets old, especially when the investigations never actually happen, so they never get closed.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:56 AM (ruxvM)

527 Kramer, Seinfeld, Beauty Pageant, "Poise," Dead Birds.

Posted by: ULTRAMARINE at December 20, 2013 10:56 AM (yhJhK)

528 poised [poizd] Show IPA adjective 1. (of a person) composed, dignified, and self-assured. 2. being in balance or equilibrium: a balloon poised on the nose of a seal. 3. teetering or wavering: to be poised on the brink of disaster. 4. hovering or suspended in or as in midair: a bird poised in flight; a helicopter poised overhead.

Posted by: Sesame Street at December 20, 2013 10:57 AM (lZBBB)

529 "In spite of all our wars, we abide by the rule of law."

WTF does he mean by that? 

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:57 AM (lVPtV)

530 "...America, despite its warts,..."

What "warts" is he referring to?

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 10:57 AM (ruxvM)

531 "Great, spit in the face of the GOP before the holidays and expect them to roll over."

You say that as if there was actually any question about the GOP rolling over and showing their bellies.  Of course they will.

Posted by: Jaws at December 20, 2013 10:58 AM (4I3Uo)

532 Warts, not wars. If we abide by laws, why is he changing Obamacare whenever it suits him?

Posted by: Lizabth at December 20, 2013 10:58 AM (JZBti)

533 553 "...America, despite its warts,..."

What "warts" is he referring to?

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 02:57 PM (ruxvM)




White people, of course. 

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:58 AM (lVPtV)

534 "I've gotta go. I've got to put Bo and that other dog on their planes and then get in a round of golf before AF-1 leaves."

Posted by: Daybrother at December 20, 2013 10:59 AM (pzyOS)

535 I guess Santa needs to bring me a hearing aid for Christmas. 

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 10:59 AM (lVPtV)

536 That wart next to his nose.

It distracts him.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 10:59 AM (LSDdO)

537 Erick Ericsson is right (subbing for Rush today)... Look out for what is going to be released before Christmas, if not today... It is such a shifty thing to do, but that is the US of Frikking Mugabe.

Posted by: Baldy at December 20, 2013 10:59 AM (2bql3)

538 553 "...America, despite its warts,..." What "warts" is he referring to? Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 02:57 PM (ruxvM) Can't be me.... I'm fookin English...

Posted by: Aurthur, King of the Britons at December 20, 2013 11:00 AM (lZBBB)

539 Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 02:59 PM (lVPtV)

It's a lot of fun to go " what?" and make people repeat themselves.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Unexpurgated Edition) at December 20, 2013 11:00 AM (LSDdO)

540 552 "In spite of all our wars, we abide by the rule of law." WTF does he mean by that? Well, eh, we are looking, eh and a subset, eh, to help those, eh, that got screwed by the GOP shutdown, eh and the other point, eh, I forgot.

Posted by: Barry, Chom leader at December 20, 2013 11:00 AM (0FSuD)

541 I'm sure the Marines and their families are looking forward to being run off their beach so the Obamas and their trashy pals can have it to themselves.  Same with the base fitness center. 

Sucks to be them during the holidays.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 11:00 AM (lVPtV)

542 This Obama fellow is one droning, boring speaker.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 11:01 AM (lVPtV)

543 WTF does he mean by that? It's a shot at the war criminal Booooosh and his Reign of Torture.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 11:02 AM (7ObY1)

544 >>"In spite of all our wars, we abide by the rule of law."
WTF does he mean by that?

Exactly - makes no sense when answering a question about Snowden.

Posted by: Lizzy at December 20, 2013 11:02 AM (ruxvM)

545 I can't take any more.  Off to the nood thread.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 11:02 AM (lVPtV)

546

The ATO bit is a BIG F*ing DEAL. It makes for a living hell for cyber systems in the government. But it really is a minimum set of standards. There's plenty of room above those standards for cybersecurity risk.

 

Posted by: GWB at December 20, 2013 11:02 AM (kEVTZ)

547 I'm trying to type out his lies but he's lying so fast I can't keep up.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami at December 20, 2013 11:02 AM (bCEmE)

548 Eh, 85%, eh, are enjoying, eh, the benefits, eh, that,eh we have made, eh a basic structure, eh, that is working. Despite, eh, our, eh, problem, eh website, with common sense, eh, negate something, eh

Posted by: Barry, Chom leader at December 20, 2013 11:03 AM (0FSuD)

549 So now we're Hobbit terrorist warts in a ditch?

Posted by: Mama AJ at December 20, 2013 11:03 AM (SUKHu)

550 ah count at 5000. Someone count them.

Posted by: Nip Sip at December 20, 2013 11:04 AM (0FSuD)

551 In the immortal words of the late, great Ronnie James Dio: The world is full of kings and queens Who'll blind your eyes and steal your dreams

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at December 20, 2013 11:05 AM (7ObY1)

552 That ought to go over well. Not. Posted by: Jane D'oh at December 20, 2013 02:55 PM (lVPtV) The press corps just messed themselves. The One mentioned them.

Posted by: RWC at December 20, 2013 11:15 AM (fWAjv)

553 The Pajama Game with Barack Obama A Branco cartoon: http://legalinsurrection.com/2013/12/branco-cartoon-the-pajama-game/

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at December 20, 2013 11:28 AM (BC6cY)

554 "'m not sure about that. This New Illegal Law was just previewed last night. Have insurers even had time to crunch the actuarial numbers to assign a price for such policies?" I don't think they are too worried about price at this point. The way the site works is you have to enter in all your information up front and what you are presented with would depend on that information. Prior to last night, if you entered an age over 30, you would have not even been presented with an option for a catastrophic plan. That would require some coding changes. It was purely speculation on my part but the site would need to be "bounced" for that change to be reflected in a uniform manner across all the servers and databases.

Posted by: crosspatch at December 20, 2013 06:31 PM (ZbLJZ)

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