January 30, 2013

Jay Carney: Despite Economy's Contraction, We're "Still Poised" for Growth
— Ace

I'm "still poised" to win the special lottery they secretly enter you in every time you masturbate.

I've got like sixty thousand secret Masturbation Lottery tickets. One of them smells like a winner.

Others... Well, I keep them in a crawlspace.

Economic Status Update: Poised.

Secret Masturbation Lottery Status Update: Lock of the week.

So it's going to be this all month, "best looking contraction you've ever seen" and "we're totally open to the prospect of a recovery."

All month? Laugh. The press won't ask about this past 3PM.

Via @lilmissrightie

What I Meant To Say Was... Now this link to The Conversation should work.

I had to just clean a few things up for you.


Posted by: Ace at 10:05 AM | Comments (439)
Post contains 136 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Oh, we're poised all right, poised at the brink of the precipice.

Posted by: joncelli at January 30, 2013 10:06 AM (RD7QR)

2 Poised to hurl

Posted by: Decker at January 30, 2013 10:06 AM (uhftQ)

3 I'm poised for slight incompetence

Posted by: Barry at January 30, 2013 10:06 AM (83G/4)

4 "Even MORE Growth Now Possible"

Posted by: t-bird at January 30, 2013 10:06 AM (FcR7P)

5

Missed it by one post

 

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at January 30, 2013 10:06 AM (uhftQ)

6 More lying media shit.  Everything is going to be reported as sunshine and roses as long as the stuttering clusterfuck is at the top of the responsibility chain. 



If this were George Bush, we would never stop hearing about the "McJobs" he's creating.  


Posted by: DiogenesLamp at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (bb5+k)

7 Jay Carney, what an appropriate name.

Posted by: dogfish at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (NuPNl)

8 Poised......on the edge of a cliff.....

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (uhftQ)

9 We are pushing deeper into Eurasia than ever. Eastasia will fall soon.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (pmDdf)

10 Poised, Wile E. Coyote-like, in mid-air.

Posted by: joncelli at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (RD7QR)

11 Well, I know where he is now!

Posted by: General Hooker, Optimistic upon hearing General Jackson had rolled up on his flank at Chancellorsvil at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (F6KtL)

12 McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!!




Remember when they used that term??

Posted by: DiogenesLamp at January 30, 2013 10:07 AM (bb5+k)

13 The heights that our economy is poised to scale never looked higher!

Posted by: t-bird at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (FcR7P)

14 "Poise" is the name of a hygiene product for older women. *cough*

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (ZKzrr)

15 One of them smells like a winner.


It's a funny kind of smell,right?

Posted by: dantesed at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (++FkS)

16 "best looking contraction you've ever seen" ________ Like the mess in my pants.

Posted by: Al Roker at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (r2PLg)

17 It's gonna be great, it's gonna be awesome, just you wait.  You're gonna love my recovery baby.  My big huge recovery.  All the girls say I have the biggest recovery you've ever seen and it will rock your world.

Trust me.

Apropos of nothing in particular, you might find that something may find its way into your mouth.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (T0NGe)

18 I think, you dumb wingnuts, what Carney is talking about is Obama's economic plan, as he touted in the debates...obamanomics, if you will...of hiring 100,000 teachers and finally making the rich pay taxes. Like every great economy in history, 100,000 teachers and taxes are the keystone*, epicenter, soul, what have you of economic growth.\ So, suck it. We expect growth to occur. * = I can't be the only person totally annoyed with how this was literally the obama 2012 election campaign. right? He brought this up in each of the 4 debates (I mean, even Biden brought this up).

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (QxSug)

19 Your GDP growth has been INCREASED from  +3% to -0.1%.


Posted by: jukin at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (WGm5T)

20 They have less ammo now!

Posted by: Genera Burnside, Optimstic after three failed charges at Fredericksburg at January 30, 2013 10:08 AM (F6KtL)

21 And we laughed at Baghdad Bob...

Posted by: AmishDude at January 30, 2013 10:09 AM (T0NGe)

22 Obama has stopped the bleeding,,,good times ahead!

Posted by: shit my black friend@work saids at January 30, 2013 10:09 AM (NquK2)

23


Poised for positive shrinkage.


Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at January 30, 2013 10:09 AM (7zeCD)

24 Like the mess in my pants.

Posted by: Al Roker

-----------

Or mine

Posted by: Jason London at January 30, 2013 10:09 AM (uhftQ)

25 What difference does it make if the economy goes up or down? 

Posted by: Hillarity at January 30, 2013 10:09 AM (uEm7J)

26 Poised to jump. Like Thelma and Louise's car.

Posted by: t-bird at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (FcR7P)

27 That  $6 trillion  in "investments"  has  to  pay  of sooner or  later  right?

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (gmeXX)

28 Mein Fuhrer, we are poised to retake Stalingrad!

Posted by: General Paulus at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (RD7QR)

29

Ha! Now they have to fight!

Posted by: General Custer, Optimistic after being surrounded by Indians at Little Bighorn at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (F6KtL)

30 The choco-rat is poised for an increase.

Posted by: Warthog at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (WDySP)

31 I smell fish

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (uhftQ)

32 "we're totally open to the prospect of a recovery. _______________ Did they really say-- "totally open"? Who the hell is running that place--Lindsey Lohan?

Posted by: tasker at January 30, 2013 10:10 AM (r2PLg)

33 worst recovery since great depression 1.0 when we did the same thing as we're doing now. go figure. And how are we poised for growth? We are keeping interest rates so low that there's hardly any ROI on investments. Regulations up your ass, plebes. Say, taxes are stimulative right? In as much as "economists" like Susan Feinberg think that government spending is stimulative, eh? I can't really blame the GOP, the media's war on the truth continues. Even if a member of the GOP were to be clean and articulate (a first since reagan), there would be no platform from which to be heard.

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 10:11 AM (QxSug)

34 Poison?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 30, 2013 10:11 AM (C8mVl)

35 Who the hell is running that place--Lindsey Lohan? --- I'd think we would have ended up with more right by accident if Miss Lohan were running things than Sir Skeetsalot.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 30, 2013 10:11 AM (e0xKF)

36 Now I can finally prove I can ride through the whole Sioux nation with just 80 men!

Posted by: Captain Fetterman, Optimistic after being surrounded by Indians at Lodge Trail Ridge at January 30, 2013 10:12 AM (F6KtL)

37 I am, in fact, posting this from a mcDonalds in Glenn Burnie, MD. Enjoying a fish fillet. Economy looks robust from this vantage point.

Posted by: Serious Cat at January 30, 2013 10:12 AM (lPWWH)

38 Lance is yet again poised to win the Tour de Frog.  All he needs, like our economy, is a little boost.

Posted by: Hillarity at January 30, 2013 10:12 AM (uEm7J)

39 "we're  totally  open  to the prospect of a recovery."   Is  that the best lie they can come up with.  WOuld you at least  say,  "we completely  expect a strong  recovery."

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:12 AM (gmeXX)

40 Look fags, I don't make numbers. They just happen! Brought to you by Carl's Jr.

Posted by: President Camacho's Press Secretary at January 30, 2013 10:12 AM (LR8/y)

41 I had to just clean a few things up for you.


I hope you washed your hands first.





Sinner.

Posted by: eleven at January 30, 2013 10:12 AM (KXm42)

42

How could this happen, ABC, CBS, and NBC assured me the economy was going great!!!

 

Unlike the evil Booosh years of 5% unemployment and anemic 4% GDP growth? 

 

 

Posted by: rd at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (zLp5I)

43 And I'm open to winning the lottery...

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (uhftQ)

44  The one and only reason that 3Q 2012 was at 3% is most people in business thought that 0bama would lose. 4Q 2012 is them preparing for FORE MORE YEARS of true economic illiteracy.

Posted by: jukin at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (WGm5T)

45 Imagine the GDP without the gun/ammo and fracking contributions.

Posted by: Schwalbe: The Me-262© at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (UU0OF)

46 We'll play keep away from our horrible offense and make the other teams offense score instead of ours!

Posted by: Jacksonville Jags Front Office, Optimistic after taking a punter in the 3rd round at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (F6KtL)

47 40 Look fags, I don't make numbers. They just happen! Brought to you by Carl's Jr. --- Fuck you, I'm eating.

Posted by: Carl's Jr at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (e0xKF)

48 Debra Heine looks cute. In her pic she reminds me of Rashida Jones.

Posted by: logprof at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (jVAw4)

49 Like Japan was still poised for victory in 1945

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:13 AM (1Jaio)

50 The MSM is poised to keep felating Obama.


Posted by: Al at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (V70Uh)

51 Imagine if Romney won the election and this news came out just a couple weeks after his inauguration.  Wonder what the talk would have been....

Posted by: keena at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (JpqtI)

52 33 we are poised for growth - like cancer is. Hope you know spanish

Posted by: Bigby's Cold Dead Hands at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (pThb5)

53 Even if a member of the GOP were to be clean and articulate (a first since reagan), there would be no platform from which to be heard.

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 02:11 PM (QxSug)



And this is why we should stop being indulgent/tolerant of the media.  We need to express our selves to them as we would when facing a hostile enemy, because that is exactly what they are.  We must work AROUND them.  Not through them.  Everything that goes through them will be filtered and/or manipulated. 


It's long past time for us to start buying controlling interests in the broadcast hardware.







Posted by: DiogenesLamp at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (bb5+k)

54 And I'm open to being molested by the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders...

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (uhftQ)

55 What  difference  does it make?  All that matters is  bin laden is dead and general  motors  is alive.  

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (gmeXX)

56 37 I am, in fact, posting this from a mcDonalds in Glenn Burnie, MD. Enjoying a fish fillet. Economy looks robust from this vantage point.

Posted by: Serious Cat at January 30, 2013 02:12 PM (lPWWH)


Yup. Inside the DC bubble is fat city. 50 miles outside...not so much.

Posted by: joncelli at January 30, 2013 10:14 AM (RD7QR)

57

Why TodayÂ’s GDP Report IsnÂ’t As Bad As It Looks
By Christopher Matthews - Time



Fuck!  I just got laid off!
By Christopher Matthews - Time

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at January 30, 2013 10:15 AM (kdS6q)

58 This can only get better.

Posted by: Capt. Max Pruss at January 30, 2013 10:15 AM (QKKT0)

59 PART-TIME McJobs.  Wouldn't want MessiahCare kicking in now, would we?

Posted by: dfbaskwill at January 30, 2013 10:15 AM (71LDo)

60

 

We are...'still poised'...for the monumental mass ass-fucking that is coming.

 

Posted by: wheatie at January 30, 2013 10:15 AM (BZMZX)

61 Yeah Jay you know every time you tell a lie your dick grows....Jay you're what 90 feet tall now?

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 10:15 AM (LRFds)

62 Your mouth is still poised to not have something in it.

Posted by: The Mega Independent[/i] at January 30, 2013 10:15 AM (xp8vD)

63 I'm poised to give Eliza Dushku the old 'what for'...

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:16 AM (8sCoq)

64 Low info voters are "default liberals" as Breitbart often noted he once was. Many of these folks are intelligent, busy professionals who are not terribly ideological, moderate to conservative in their personal lives, but unfortunately still swayed by the MSM, which they consider the most trustworthy source for news. They hear a soundbite about NRA goons heckling the poor Sandy Hook victim's dad, and they think, "wow, what rude, disgusting jerks." End of story. --That describes a lot of the old sports dorks like Peter King well.

Posted by: logprof at January 30, 2013 10:16 AM (jVAw4)

65 This is the Steiner Detachment Economy.

Posted by: Cicero, Semiautomatic Assault Commenter at January 30, 2013 10:16 AM (QKKT0)

66 I'm poised to win the Super Bowl!

Posted by: Tom Brady at January 30, 2013 10:16 AM (jVAw4)

67 We still beleive in Presdent Obama and Romney would have been a greater disaster. Without Presdent Obama's plan the economy might have shrunk more then 0.1%. I am proud of our black presdent and what he has done to help the middle class......

Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, Vt and Proud of it !!!!!!!!!! at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (48wze)

68 54 33 we are poised for growth - like cancer is. Hope you know spanish --- No esta Lionel Hutz, esta Miguel Sanchez. A donde estan las ambulancias? Neccisito trabajos.

Posted by: Miguel Sanchez at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (e0xKF)

69 >>>>>>One of them smells like a winner? What do the rest of the tickets smell like?

Posted by: L, elle at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (0PiQ4)

70

No, this is completely accurate.  I, for one, am completely poised to have sweet, sweet love showered on me by multiple college-coeds.  Now, that will never happen, not without a huge lottery winning on my part, but I am totally poised -- totes.

 

Will no one rid me of this troublesome Carney?

Posted by: acethepug at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (OQhDd)

71 My cruise line career is poised to improve dramatically.

Posted by: Capt. Schettino at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (QKKT0)

72 except for losing my job, my health insurance, and being underwater on my mortgage, things are looking up

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (8sCoq)

73 53 Imagine if Romney won the election and this news came out just a couple weeks after his inauguration. Wonder what the talk would have been....

Posted by: keena at January 30, 2013 02:14 PM (JpqtI)


Imagine if this was the 3rd quarter GDP #...President Romney would be piling on and complaining about the mess that JEF left.

Posted by: Ed Gibbon at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (4eNxd)

74 Imagine the GDP without the gun/ammo and fracking contributions.

Posted by: Schwalbe: The Me-262© at January 30, 2013 02:13 PM (UU0OF)


Imagine a 1st quarter GDP with an increase payroll tax. How the hell do you fuck up the holiday season, the season of all out consumption.

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (NzBQO)

75 Double fucking plus good.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (QF8uk)

76 60,000 That # isn't believable even in San Diego.

Posted by: DaveA (assistant Math Warlock) at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (tAie3)

77 "Poised" is the new "in between jobs".

Posted by: eleven at January 30, 2013 10:17 AM (KXm42)

78 71 >>>>>>One of them smells like a winner? What do the rest of the tickets smell like? --- Pineapple?

Posted by: Foul Bachelor Frog at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (e0xKF)

79 they really arent poised yet.

Posted by: Bigby's Cold Dead Hands at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (pThb5)

80 Chicago is poised to not have any murders

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (1Jaio)

81 Poised rhymes with Moist no? Makes the masterbatory allusion all the more piquant. Think about it.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (jucos)

82 I don't think I've ever seen such a look of misery and dejection on the face of my daughter as I just did a moment ago. I sat down with her on the sofa and (as calmly as I could) tried to explain to her why the Republicans have tanked the economy. I tried to keep my voice steady, but it became increasingly difficult - the rage and feelings of helplessness were just too much. She could tell something was wrong. I found myself at such a loss for words - nothing made any sense; nothing makes sense anymore. I finally had to admit, " I just don't know - I don't know what's going on in this country anymore..." When I finished her lower lip started to tremble and her eyes began to fill with tears, "Mommy" she said, "why are the Republicans doing this to the country?" Well, that was it for me: I finally fell apart. I just fell into her arms and we both began sobbing for several minutes. She had to comfort me and get me back on my feet. Sometimes I just think itÂ’s too much, but seeing the strength in my daughters voice helped me to get through.

Posted by: CheChe v.7.0 at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (feFL6)

83 Despite the maggots and putrefication, Teddy Kennedy is "poised" to reclaim his Senatorial seat.

Posted by: DangerGirl at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (yxa5A)

84 lolz, what difference does it make? While all roads lead to Glen Burnie, GB is quite far from the DC boom town. And if you're there, why not hit the doughnut place near the mcdonalds?

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (QxSug)

85

34 Poison?

 

Heh, yeah...still poisoned.

 

Jim Jones used poisoned koolaid, to kill off his followers.

 

Emperor Dung Beetle will hold the record, though...for the 'most people ass-fucked at the same time'.

Posted by: wheatie at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (BZMZX)

86 I won't cum in your mouth but I am poised to do it.

Posted by: Ken Royall at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (x0g8a)

87 "we continue to be poised for economic growth & job creation." ________________ translation: We've had America bent over for four years now--and they want more!!!

Posted by: tasker at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (r2PLg)

88 We still use it when discussing the Texas economy.

12 McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!! McJobs!!!!


Remember when they used that term??

Posted by: DiogenesLamp at January 30, 2013 02:07 PM (bb5+k)

Posted by: MSM at January 30, 2013 10:18 AM (cv5Iw)

89 Fuhrer, we are still poised to take back Berlin.

Posted by: A German General in 1945 at January 30, 2013 10:19 AM (F6KtL)

90 Hamburger Flipper Jobs!

OT
Where's Geraldo? There are koi ponds being destroyed by tornadoes in TN, MS, and GA  RIGHT NOW !!!

oh yeah, Red States, my bad


Posted by: T. Hunter - let it burn at January 30, 2013 10:19 AM (EZl54)

91 We're poised to win the pennant!

Posted by: NY Mets at January 30, 2013 10:19 AM (eHIJJ)

92 Hope you know spanish --- No esta Lionel Hutz, esta Miguel Sanchez. A donde estan las ambulancias? Neccisito trabajos. No trabajo for caca.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 30, 2013 10:19 AM (GFM2b)

93 Lolz, Steiner's assault will save the economy.

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 10:19 AM (QxSug)

94 OT Breaking news.  Gunman opens fire in office in Phoenix, AZ. 
http://tinyurl.com/ajhjv56

Pray for the Horde who live there.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:20 AM (wYPjI)

95 I prefer "fixin' to grow" over being "still poised" for growth.

Posted by: Muad'dib at January 30, 2013 10:20 AM (KjlbF)

96 and Scott Brown voted for dodd-frank. oh well, a soft red republican is 100x better than soviet agent Ted Kennedy.

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 10:20 AM (QxSug)

97 97 OT Breaking news. Gunman opens fire in office in Phoenix, AZ. http://tinyurl.com/ajhjv56 Pray for the Horde who live there. --- My sister used to live there. Between her roommates being worthless and the city becoming #2 in the world for kidnappings thanks to the cartel, she decided to move back to BR.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (e0xKF)

98 >we continue to be poised


who the fuck talks like this?

it's like saying 'I continue to stay put'

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (8sCoq)

99
Six Reasons to Discount the G.D.P. Shocker

John Cassidy - The New Yorker


The economy unexpectedly contracted in the fourth quarter, but analysts said there was no reason for panic

Lucia Mutikani - Reuters




*whirl* *whirl* *whirl*

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (kdS6q)

100 >>>96 Lolz, Steiner's assault will save the economy. Yeah, Big Poppa Pump will put the economy in the Steiner Recliner until it taps out.

Posted by: El Kabong at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (LR8/y)

101 We are still poised to get guns off our streets to stop senseless killings

Posted by: City of Chicago at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (F6KtL)

102 On FNC's jobs segment yesterday morning, they spoke of the thousands of positions open at various companies. Lowes: Thousands, but are seasonal between Feb and Sept. They noted that the jobs won't last that long, only that some locations will hire in February for a few months and others won't hire until May or June for a few months. Schlotskies: sub sandwiches Bank of America: Didn't they just have a layoff? Medifast: Which I am guessing is also seasonal and corresponds with "New Years resolution" season. Yep. The economy is just chugging right along.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (piMMO)

103 I've been 'poised' to get filthy rich for years; decades.


Kate Upton is 'poised' to pleasure me--just a matter of time, that.

Posted by: DOA in Scrambletown, FLA at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (Dll6b)

104 Stay tuned for Recovery Summer IV

Posted by: Joe Biden at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (e8kgV)

105 food for thought: before a huge crash politicos always, without exception, tell everyone that everything is FINE. only giveaways are thats the only thing theyre saying and key people start going to ground.

Posted by: Bigby's Cold Dead Hands at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (pThb5)

106

So is "poised" a downgrade from "green shoots?"

 

Seems like it.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (CJjw5)

107 "we're totally open to the prospect of a recovery."

I'm totally open to the prospect of dinner at St. Elmo's tonight, and tonight when I'm home eating meatloaf I will blame everyone else for not picking me up, driving me downtown, and buying me a shrimp cocktail.

That's how totally open I am.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (ZKzrr)

108

"I've got like sixty thousand secret Masturbation Lottery tickets. One of them smells like a winner."

 

Ah yes, the aroma of baby oil, chlorine, and desperation.  Those were good times.

 

Good times.

Posted by: Your Very Very Smart Veep at January 30, 2013 10:21 AM (4I3Uo)

109 Haven't we been "poised for growth" for 48 months now?

Posted by: Teresa in Fort Worth, TX at January 30, 2013 10:22 AM (ADnWI)

110 "This stagnant economy, that I inherited from the Republican Congress..."

Posted by: CUS at January 30, 2013 10:22 AM (84pE9)

111 Yeah, the MFM is going to need a bigger shovel for this shit.

Posted by: runningrn at January 30, 2013 10:22 AM (Ag5D2)

112 We're poised to beat the Globetrotters!

Posted by: Washington Generals at January 30, 2013 10:22 AM (83G/4)

113 we're poised to miss that iceberg

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:22 AM (8sCoq)

114 great the last growth  meant a job paying less than 1/2 previous salary.
after  a year of being unemployed , so this one means  two years of being unemployed and wishfully   1/4 of pre 4 year ago paycheck?

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (nqBYe)

115 MFM: We're poised to not be a propaganda machine for the Democrat Party

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (1Jaio)

116

I'm still poised tp get Obama to do that reach around he's been promising me, but I was too fat for him to get his little girly arms around my waist.

Posted by: Chris Christie at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (F6KtL)

117 Looks  like  Drew  nailed it.   Carney is already  using the contraction  in an effort to  stave  off  sequestration.  Hopefully   Boehner  stands  strong.

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (gmeXX)

118 They're poised and I'm pissed.snafu

Posted by: weirdflunky at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (tlhtD)

119 Dexys Midnight Runners are poised for a comeback

Posted by: El Kabong at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (LR8/y)

120 103 >>>96 Lolz, Steiner's assault will save the economy. Yeah, Big Poppa Pump will put the economy in the Steiner Recliner until it taps out. --- HOLLA IF YOU HEAR ME!

Posted by: Big Poppa Pump at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (e0xKF)

121 83 Poised rhymes with Moist no? Makes the masterbatory allusion all the more piquant. Think about it.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at January 30, 2013 02:18 PM (jucos)


Great. Piquant ewok masturbation.

Posted by: joncelli at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (RD7QR)

122 I'm so sick of Republicans running the country!

Posted by: ette-channelning da left at January 30, 2013 10:23 AM (nqBYe)

123 Jay Carney is poised to grow tall

Posted by: My Hormone at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (DrC22)

124 If folks stop buying ammo, the contraction goes to double figures.

Posted by: Dark Ages at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (1CULz)

125 Wenn Steiner's Angriff commt.....alles in ordnung.


sicher; doch. 

Posted by: der OKW und Luftwaffe at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (Dll6b)

126 Not an accident. . They're poised to do something all right, just nothing good for you.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith's mobile at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (fKyp3)

127 On cue:

Fully 60 percent of Americans have a favorable impression of Obama in the new poll, up slightly from October but a clear shift in opinion from an election year in which his ratings hovered in the mid-to-low 50s.

Posted by: The "artist" formerly known as "The Artist former known as Prince" at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (e8kgV)

128 Falco is not poised for a comeback.  If he is, well then we have other more pressing things to worry about.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (wYPjI)

129 I am poised to have a romantic evening with Chris Brown.

Posted by: Rihanna's Black Eye at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (CJjw5)

130

There is one perfect response to Jay Carney, nearly every time:

 

"Are you high???"

 

That is all.

Posted by: Prescient11 at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (tVTLU)

131

115 Yeah, the MFM is going to need a bigger shovel for this shit.

 

They have...shovel ready jobs.

 

Posted by: wheatie at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (BZMZX)

132 Carney is already using the contraction in an effort to stave off sequestration. Hopefully Boehner stands strong.

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 02:23 PM (gmeXX)


hahaha

Posted by: ette-channelning da left at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (nqBYe)

133 Ah, remember the economic pessimism of the Bush years? All 12 Bush years, in fact? The economy was in a constant state of imminent death...and, magically, with a Democrat in office, it turned into fucking Ulysses.

Posted by: zsasz at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (MMC8r)

134 my aunt is poised to sprout balls and mustache and be my uncle

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (8sCoq)

135 I'm poised to be next POTUS!!!

Posted by: Sheriff Joe at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (Ag5D2)

136 Hindenburg: We're poised for a successful landing

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:24 AM (1Jaio)

137

Once again, this thread contains one impersonator of me. No doubt male, no doubt a pathetic right-wing troll like the rest of you.

 

Our economy is held hostage by right-wing forces. International Bankers own the Wall Street Machine, and they would rather starve Americans than let that machinery perform. Letting it sit idle to embarrass our wise multiracial President is preferable to these -steins and - bergs than Barack Obama receiving his due credit for undoing the damage caused by that pathetic faux-Texan cowboy-wannabe.

 

So remember, all of you will starve in the cold and the dark simply because the Right wishes to humiliate our rightful Leader.

Posted by: Mary Cloggenstein from Brattleboro, VT at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (jCQ+I)

138

I mean  Obama is  using  the contraction to stave  off  sequestration.  Carney is obviously  just the  spokesman.  I  look  forward  to seeing him as moderator of  Meet the Press in 4 years.

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (gmeXX)

139

OK, I'm breathing a little heavy and my heart rate is spiking.

 

I'm not in good enough shape to handle two blogs, so it's time to pick Ace, where do you want us?  Here or at the Conversation?

Posted by: jwest at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (ZDsRL)

140 I'm poised to sprout wings so I don't bump my ass a-hoppin'.

Posted by: Frog at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (e0xKF)

141 Titanic... unsinkable!

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (9+ccr)

142

you can think of this as a Star Spangled Banner day for the economy. The fiscal cliff was the rocket's red glare. The tax increases and spending cuts coming into the economy now are the bombs. But the recovery is still there.

Tim Mullaney - USA TODAY

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (kdS6q)

143 boy we grab a meme and beat it to death

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (8sCoq)

144 Glad I have you fuckers to keep me sane. Carry on.

Posted by: Eaton Cox at January 30, 2013 10:25 AM (q177U)

145  Dexys Midnight Runners are poised for a comeback

Posted by: El Kabong at January 30, 2013 02:23 PM (LR8/y)

 

Come on, Eilee- I mean, El Kabong. Would that necessarily be so wrong?

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (+/C3g)

146 new talking point sometime in the future, calling it

That was Nancy P's talking point in 2009.  You no longer need to work to support yourself, because she and Obama will take care of you.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (ZKzrr)

147 I am poised to inhale 5 miles of dick and 8 metric tons of chocolate cake.

Posted by: Lena Dunham at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (CJjw5)

148 148 boy we grab a meme and beat it to death --- It's justifiable homicide.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (e0xKF)

149 We should set up a play date with the president, sort of a reach across the aisle type of thing, where him and Cheney go skeet shooting. Obama can run the skeet machine.

Posted by: Whatev at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (A7Wh1)

150 I'm poised to be at least as funny as Margaret Cho.

Posted by: Kathy Griffin at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (eHIJJ)

151 Those redshirt security officers are poised for a successful return from the alien planet.

Posted by: El Kabong at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (LR8/y)

152

I'm sure he added to his poised for growth with the caveat - " as long as the Republicans do not continue with their obstruction "

Posted by: polynikes at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (m2CN7)

153 I'm poised to actually kick that fucking football for once.

Posted by: Charlie Brown at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (F6KtL)

154 looks more like equipoise

Posted by: Bigby's Cold Dead Hands at January 30, 2013 10:26 AM (pThb5)

155 I'm poised to make my big break into showbusiness!

Posted by: Ricky Hollywood at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (e0xKF)

156 Meine Vergeltungwaffen wird die Wirtschaft retten.

Posted by: A. Hitler at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (QKKT0)

157 I'm poised to make a deposit in my bank. By "deposit" I mean "puddle" and by "my bank" I mean "your mouth".

Posted by: Jay's Hung Like A Carney at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (1FLBb)

158 eatin' cocks??????


How's that working out for you, lad?

Posted by: Jim in Beam at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (Dll6b)

159 I'm poised .

 i must do something.
but i don't know what.
if i only knew what .

cracks egg

Posted by: ette-channelning da left at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (nqBYe)

160 I am poised to have a great luncheon after this motorcade.

Posted by: John F Kennedy at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (jucos)

161 Hunka hunka burning poise 

Posted by: Elvis Poisely at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (tdaam)

162 What he meant was that Mooch has ordered the large size Poise Pads, just in case anybody gets all wee-weed up about the latest recession/depression.


That's the Poise he was talking about.


H8'ers.

Posted by: tcn at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (VLG62)

163 boy we grab a meme and beat it to death

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 02:25 PM (8sCoq)

 

We do if we're trying to win Ace's interesting lottery.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (+/C3g)

164 I am poised to generate record profits for the Coca-Cola Company.

Posted by: New Coke at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (CJjw5)

165 Mark Sanchez is poised to win a Super Bowl.

Posted by: dantesed at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (++FkS)

166 152 new talking point sometime in the future, calling it

That was Nancy P's talking point in 2009. You no longer need to work to support yourself, because she and Obama will take care of you.


Ahh yes.  We could all go write poetry. And do some performance art.

Posted by: Muad'dib is Fixin' to Have a Beer at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (KjlbF)

167 Still poised to get to second base with my internet "girlfriend."

Posted by: Burt Man-boi at January 30, 2013 10:27 AM (TOk1P)

168 Robert Reich: I'm poised to be 6'5"

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:28 AM (1Jaio)

169 Inside the DC bubble not all is sweetness and light. Our little company's earning are down 60% this past year, nothing on the horizon, and we are competing against early retired government workers who have gold plated bennie plans that we don't. In 2009 we prepared over 40 1099's for subs and this year 11. Course we could have contributed to Moran and Murtha and been assured of a glorious future......

Posted by: Name changed to protect the innocent. at January 30, 2013 10:28 AM (l3vZN)

170 We are poised for a quiet docking.

Posted by: Captain of the Hindenburg at January 30, 2013 10:28 AM (Qfumq)

171 @ JDP


http://tinyurl.com/baaykl2

Posted by: T. Hunter - let it burn at January 30, 2013 10:28 AM (EZl54)

172 Michelle: I'm poised to have a tiny ass

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:28 AM (1Jaio)

173 college grad living in your basement, pretending to work on his resume but really looking at porn, "I am poised for greatness!!"

Posted by: Thunderb at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (Dnbau)

174 Now that that's out of the way, time to go back and see how many times I got beat to that one by you early birders...

Posted by: BurtTC at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (TOk1P)

175 White House: GOP responsible for contracting economy

White House press secretary Jay Carney laid the blame for a surprise economic contraction squarely at the feet of congressional Republicans Wednesday, saying economic threats during the "fiscal cliff" negotiations had prevented important defense spending.

"Our economy is facing a major headwinds, and that's Republicans in Congress," Carney said.

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (8sCoq)

176 I'm poised to win a Super Bowl Ring!!!

Posted by: Ryan Leaf at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (Ag5D2)

177 Tony Romo is poised to stop throwing passes to the other team.


Posted by: Wally in Walla Walla at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (Dll6b)

178

 

Any decent press pool would have laughed him out of the room.

 

I know, I know.

 

In other news, Ron Jeremy in critical condition, aneursym. But he's poised for comeback. Best wishes, Ron.

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (1Y+hH)

179 I am poised for a worldwide reunion tour with INXS.

Posted by: Michael Hutchence is hung like David Carradine at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (CJjw5)

180 If folks stop buying ammo, the contraction goes to double figures. They are going to. Not because they want to, but because there is none left.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (GFM2b)

181 We're poised for the successful destruction of Yavin.

Posted by: Grand Moff Tarkin at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (LR8/y)

182 The Moron Horde, we are poised to beat a meme to death just like the Chicago PD is poised to maintain disorder.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (wYPjI)

183 Fully 60 percent of Americans have a favorable impression of Obama in the new poll I'd venture that about between 50 to 60% of Americans have a form of 'Stockholm syndrome'.

Posted by: Schrödinger's cat [/i] at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (feFL6)

184 I'm still poised to be the great minority Republican candidate you've all been waiting for.

Posted by: Marco Rubio at January 30, 2013 10:29 AM (F6KtL)

185 I like the way Obama poised himself to shoot skeet.  The cutey-pie, custom-saddle, skeet shoes are the bees-knees, baby!

Posted by: Fritz at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (/ZZCn)

186 Custer was poised to defeat the natives at Little Big Horn.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (+/C3g)

187
Wait...  Where is:

Your Mouth, Poised.


Posted by: Guy Mohawk at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (p/cQy)

188 Poise counts!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMJnWrKQeqY#t=0m50s

Posted by: Waterhouse at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (xGlYu)

189 167 I lol'd. Thanks. Now back to work.

Posted by: Socktopus at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (1FLBb)

190

By my count we've been poised to make an   economic recovery since, oh, 2009.         That's a helluva lot of poise.     Ballerinas    spend less time poised than that.    

 

In fact, haven't we BEEN recovering since Preezy McSanchez     took office?     Or     were     the Preezy and his coterie lying about all those Recovery Summers?    Surely the Preezy wouldn't LIE.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (4df7R)

191 I'm poised to bark at your fucking cat.

Posted by: Killerdog at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (zT5fX)

192

Growth Stall Obscures U.S. Consumer, Business Pickup

Shobhana Chandra and Michelle Jamrisko - Business Week



Outlook still clear despite shower

Robin Harding and James Politi - Financial Times

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (kdS6q)

193 Wow, listening to the news break just now, I didn't know it was possible to use the words surprisingly and unexpectedly that many times in a 20 second blurb.

Posted by: mugiwara at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (wGIhN)

194

 

Gov Moonbeam poised to balance CA budget.

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (1Y+hH)

195 Hey, it could have been worse. And, you know, seeing as I already won this thing, IT DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE!!! 

Repeat after me: IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER, IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER, IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER

Posted by: barack obama as Augustus at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (4eNxd)

196 I'm poised for skeet. Or lunch. Mostly lunch.

Posted by: NCKate at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (niJ61)

197 The Conversation?

Posted by: Cabaret Voltaire at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (8MnhW)

198

ee-ee

ee

ee-ee

ee-ee

ee

ee-ee

ee

Posted by: a porpoise at January 30, 2013 10:30 AM (cePv8)

199

Interesting  paragraph  in the  Hill article:  "The unexpected dip was the first time the economy shrank since the 2009 economic depression, and came as a surprise to economists, who had projected modest growth."

 

One, I didn't  think  they ever referred to  it as the depression.  But since it is all about how the Republicans  were to blame, I guess this makes sense.  And 2,  what  happened early in 2009.  Oh yea,  Obama  became  president.  So we have  economic  depression  immediately  after  Obama is elected.  And first  contraction  after  he is reelected.  Its  almost  as if  electing  Obama is bad  for the economy. 

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (gmeXX)

200 listen people. We will get to the economy , soon, really, but first we must

make sure fluke has free b.c
make sure  folks have free phones.
make sure teachers are teaching the right stuff.
make sure right wingers do not have guns.



I wake up every morning thinking about jobs.   years ago said by someone.

Posted by: ette-channelning da left at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (nqBYe)

201 I am poised for a starring role in the Kill Bill prequel.

Posted by: David Carradine is hung like Michael Hutchence at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (CJjw5)

202 My gallbladder stump is "poised" to handle bacon. Any day now. Yep.

Posted by: CAC at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (DLXZb)

203

Posted by: a porpoise at January 30, 2013 02:30 PM (cePv

 

But are you a POISED porpoise?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (4df7R)

204 We must endeavor to perservere to remain poised.



And then we decided to make war with the white man.

Posted by: eleven at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (KXm42)

205 We are poised to make this an internet meme that will last for years to come.

Posted by: El Kabong at January 30, 2013 10:31 AM (LR8/y)

206 So if the GOP had won the election.... EXACTLY

Posted by: Melodicmetal at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (QY9FJ)

207 Michelle: I'm poised to have a tiny ass Psssst. It's gotta be believeable at the very least!

Posted by: rickb223 at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (GFM2b)

208 I'm poised to be shot at and broken up by President Obama when he does his skeet shootin'

Posted by: A Clay Disk at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (F6KtL)

209

 

We need to collect all the "green shoots" "recovery summer" "500,000 jobs a month" stuff from the last 4 years   in one large pile of crap and publish it in toto, everywhere....

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (1Y+hH)

210

Poised is a word used to make sure that in the event of a further downturn he can then use the word Unexpected.

 

 

Posted by: polynikes at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (m2CN7)

211 Just popping in to say that's the weirdest analogy I've ever read.

Posted by: Randy M at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (vI8R6)

212 You know what else we are "poised for"? A downward revision.

Posted by: tasker at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (r2PLg)

213 I'm poised to penetrate a cell of subversive underground dissidents. And by "cell of subversive underground dissidents," I mean "yo anus mang."

Posted by: Double-Aught Carney at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (1FLBb)

214 You know what will help this economy? Inviting even more unskilled people to come and work for low wages while we pay for their medical care, education, and food. YES!!!

Posted by: LASue at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (gjIQF)

215 We can't even see Orwell in the rear view mirror.

Posted by: toby928© for TB at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (QupBk)

216 I'm poised to live quietly and in obscurity, away from the maddening crowds...

Posted by: Bill Clintoon at January 30, 2013 10:32 AM (Ag5D2)

217 I'm poised to quit drinking.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on Amazon. http://tinyurl.com/ahc8poj at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (l86i3)

218 "The unexpected dip was the first time the economy shrank since the 2009 economic depression, and came as a surprise to economists, who had projected modest growth."

It's poised to become "unsurprising" .... and possibly even "alarming".

Posted by: T. Hunter - let it burn at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (EZl54)

219 and remember----the worst are still full of passionate intensity

Posted by: Yeats at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (Dll6b)

220 Tom Barrett POISED to beat Governor Walker in the next recall.

Posted by: CAC at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (DLXZb)

221 I'm poised to be shot at and broken up by President Obama when he does his skeet shootin'

Posted by: A Clay Disk at January 30, 2013 02:32 PM (F6KtL)

 

Awww, Clay Disk.   I think it's sweet that you expect the Preezy to actually hit you     and not fire wildly into the air like a spaz, leaving you unscathed.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (4df7R)

222 Poised...to do that thing I promised to never do again all over your face

Posted by: BCochran1981 at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (da5Wo)

223 I've got your recovery summer right here....

Posted by: Joe Biden at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (l3vZN)

224

You know what else we are "poised for"?

A downward revision

 

 

 

UNEXPECTEDLY!!!!!ELEVENTY!!!!!

Posted by: runningrn at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (Ag5D2)

225

"We believe that the right course of action is to take steps to make sure that sequester doesnÂ’t happen because itÂ’s bad for the economy and bad overall for the effort to reduce our deficits in a reasonable way," Carney said Monday.


 

Never  let an  economic  contraction  go to waste.

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (gmeXX)

226 I'm poised for anorexia!

Posted by: Rosie O. at January 30, 2013 10:33 AM (MMC8r)

227
Its just a flesh wound!

Posted by: The Black Knight Economy at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (p/cQy)

228 Gay rights and immigration are more important then the economy right now. People don't really care about this stuff and that is why they voted for Presdent Obama. WE must do something about guns to protect our children or there will be no one left to fill the jobs of the future.

Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, Vt and Proud of it !!!!!!!!!! at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (48wze)

229

173 -

 

Woohoo!  I was first!!

 

I'm so disappointed in you people. 

Posted by: BurtTC at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (TOk1P)

230 The Polish Army is poised to stop Panzers.

Posted by: dantesed at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (++FkS)

231 what would be helpful is having all  the numbers  -amts spent on  green, or any other jobs by this govt, how many jobs per trillion were created?

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (nqBYe)

232

 

Gangbangers in Chicago poised for a cessation of hostilities.

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (1Y+hH)

233 I'm poised for anorexia!

I'm poised for an erection!

Posted by: Dingy Harry at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (xGlYu)

234 CAC does your gallbladder stump get a prothesis?

Posted by: Muad'dib is Fixin' to Have a Beer at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (KjlbF)

235 We're poised to be the first of a long list of Middle East countries that will embrace freedom and become a fledging democracy where everyone has the same rights

Posted by: Eygpt at January 30, 2013 10:34 AM (F6KtL)

236 I'm poised to give up my illegal guns and go back to school...

Posted by: Chicago Gangbanger at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (Ag5D2)

237

A St. Elmo's steak and a shrimp cocktail?

 

Whoever's paying would definitely qualify for a blow job.

Posted by: jwest at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (ZDsRL)

238 See, baby, economic recovery is like an orgasm. You can't hurry it, or you'll lose focus. But the longer you wait, the more intense it will be. Ya dig? We've been anticipating four years now. Just imagine what's waiting for you now. Ya dig? So relax, honey. Relax and let the Man do his thing. Yeah.

Posted by: Noted Economist Barry White at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (T3KlW)

239 Poised for effectiveness!

Posted by: GOP leadership at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (MMC8r)

240

 

Still not seeing the troll Obama worshippers?

 

They don't like today's threads much.

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (1Y+hH)

241 I'm poised to quit drinking.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on Amazon. http://tinyurl.com/ahc8poj at January 30, 2013 02:33 PM (l86i3)


I'm poised to start drinking.

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (nqBYe)

242 ee-ee ee ee-ee ee Posted by: a porpoise ISWYDT. Golf clap.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (GFM2b)

243 I think we need to get poised for some bend over here it comes tax increase.

Posted by: weirdflunky at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (tlhtD)

244 Repeat after me: IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER, IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER, IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER

Posted by: barack obama as Augustus at January 30, 2013 02:30 PM (4eNxd)

 

Even if we play so far above our heads that our nose bleeds for six to ten days, IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER.

Posted by: polynikes at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (m2CN7)

245 I'm poised to like, you know, whatever.

Posted by: Meggie McCain at January 30, 2013 10:35 AM (eHIJJ)

246 We are poised to fight the Nazis!

Posted by: Vichy French at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (Ag5D2)

247

"We believe that the right course of action is to take steps to make sure that sequester doesnÂ’t happen because itÂ’s bad for the economy and bad overall for the effort to reduce our deficits in a reasonable way," Carney said Monday.

 

 

Oh, you mean    the sequester your    cronies agreed to a couple of years ago?    Maybe you should have thought about the ill effects of such a thing back then and actually planned ahead to avoid it, don'tcha think,      Carney Barker!  

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (4df7R)

248 Carney blamed the republicans for the low number, and he also used the  shooting death of a 15 year old Girl who performed at the inauguration to push  the need for stronger gun control. It happened in bleeping Chicago fro God sakes! Could gun control laws being any stricter than Chicago has...

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (9+ccr)

249 The NRA's position on "only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun Is a good guy with a gun" was so "extreme" that is was embraced by President Barack Obama.

Posted by: The at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (e8kgV)

250 Jay Carney: Despite Economy's Contraction, We're "Still Poised" for Growth........just like the Palestinians are poised for lasting peace.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (da5Wo)

251 Poised... to pass a budget. Just kidding!

Posted by: Dem senator at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (gjIQF)

252 I'm poised for a contraction of the muscle formerly known as your brown ring of love.

Posted by: Prof. J. Carnjob at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (1FLBb)

253 215 I'm poised to be shot at and broken up by President Obama when he does his skeet shootin'

Posted by: A Clay Disk at January 30, 2013 02:32 PM (F6KtL)

 

I think you meant by several Secret Servicemen to protect His Royal Mom-Jeams from embarrassment.

Posted by: Virginia SoCon at January 30, 2013 10:36 AM (+/C3g)

254 or posit

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (nqBYe)

255 221 You know what will help this economy? Inviting even more unskilled people to come and work for low wages while we pay for their medical care, education, and food. YES!!! Posted by: LASue at January 30, 2013 02:32 PM (gjIQF) Exactly! I agree!

Posted by: Jordana at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (jVAw4)

256 I'm poised to stop getting used by the Democrats.

Posted by: Senator John McCain at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (DLXZb)

257 and remember, this negative growth was bought with $5T in deficit spending, meaning the total federal spending (not even including massive state spending) was more like $12Trillion since 2009. So, all that "stimulative," "Keynesian" spending and we get contraction. Maybe it's time to reevalute obamanomics. Well, until he gets those 100,000 teachers hired. And then it's boomtown.

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (QxSug)

258 226 and remember----the worst are still full of passionate intensity

Posted by: Yeats at January 30, 2013 02:33 PM (Dll6b)

and...the Falconer is dead


Posted by: Fred Nietzsche at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (4eNxd)

259 We're poised to shut down Alabama!

Posted by: Notre Dame at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (FcR7P)

260 Could gun control laws being any stricter than Chicago has... --- Possibly in DC.

Posted by: Ricky Hollywood at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (e0xKF)

261 ISWYDT. Golf clap. Posted by: rickb223 at January 30, 2013 02:35 PM (GFM2b) --- http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ma7widSnai1qzwelr.gif

Posted by: Poised to Help at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (1FLBb)

262 boy we grab a meme and beat it to death

Posted by: Jones in CO

---------

Then we resuscitate it, beat it to death, resuscitate it, then beat it to death once and for all.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at January 30, 2013 10:37 AM (uhftQ)

263 We're poised to stop seeing Senator Menendez.

Posted by: Dominican Prostitots at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (DLXZb)

264
You're poised to find that gold pot.  Its right over there at the end of the Rainbow.

really go over there.

Posted by: Leprechaun Carney at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (p/cQy)

265 Biden: I'm poised to have a functioning brain

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (1Jaio)

266 My cat is "poised", over the corner of my new rug. I bet the little bastard just pee'd.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (piMMO)

267 Poised...

http://is.gd/FcGCuI

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (8sCoq)

268 241 I'm poised for anorexia! I'm poised for an erection! Posted by: Dingy Harry at January 30, 2013 02:34 PM (xGlYu) Looks like Harry is hanging out at the all boys pre-school again

Posted by: Killerdog at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (zT5fX)

269

 

I see that IowaHawk has a double post over at 'The Conversation'.

Heh.

Posted by: wheatie at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (BZMZX)

270

You know what I think would     be freakin' hysterical, and subversive as hell?

 

the next time Bammy makes an appearance somewhere, instead of playing    "Hail to the Chief,"   someone should swap out the CD with       "God Save the King."

 

See if anyone notices.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (4df7R)

271 can we get a jobs number?

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (GVxQo)

272 listen intent matters you dippy right wingers.

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (nqBYe)

273 I'm poised to go straight.

Posted by: Barney Franks at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (m2CN7)

274 Barry: I'm poised to stop blaming Bush and everyone else for everything

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:38 AM (1Jaio)

275 256 Hello Donna,

Ah that is a change, I am sure the media pointed out that "hey uh Chicago has one or two gun laws yes?'

Nah they were busy writing down it's all our fault.

I don't get how I do it but I hurt Ba-Rahn-Ko Bama

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 10:39 AM (LRFds)

276 Sequester is bad for Carney because it will be like a meteor strike on all the people who feed off the government teat.  And since many of them live in or around DC, it means real people to Carney and the others.  So yeah they will do anything to avoid sequestration.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:39 AM (wYPjI)

277 278 You know what I think would be freakin' hysterical, and subversive as hell?

the next time Bammy makes an appearance somewhere, instead of playing "Hail to the Chief," someone should swap out the CD with "God Save the King."

See if anyone notices. Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist)

Wouldn't God Save the Queen be more appropriate?

Posted by: SFGoth at January 30, 2013 10:39 AM (dZ756)

278 267 If it hadn't been for his darn girlfriend who was in fact poised to come to life.

Posted by: weirdflunky at January 30, 2013 10:39 AM (tlhtD)

279 I'm poised to uphold and protect the Constitution...

Posted by: Barak Obama at January 30, 2013 10:39 AM (Ag5D2)

280 Still not seeing the troll Obama worshippers? Related: 500 layoffs at TIME, Inc.

Posted by: t-bird at January 30, 2013 10:39 AM (FcR7P)

281 Carney blamed the republicans for the low number, and he also used the shooting death of a 15 year old Girl who performed at the inauguration to push the need for stronger gun control. It happened in bleeping Chicago fro God sakes! Could gun control laws being any stricter than Chicago has...

I think we need Chicago control.

Posted by: AmishDude at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (T0NGe)

282 >>>>Then we resuscitate it, beat it to death, resuscitate it, then beat it to death once and for all.<<<<

I'm still alive.

Posted by: The Chicken at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (p/cQy)

283 288 I'm poised to uphold and protect the Constitution...

Posted by: Barak Obama at January 30, 2013 02:39 PM (Ag5D2)



 Hahahahahahahahah

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (9+ccr)

284 t-bird, LOL.  To save cost TIME let go their troll division?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (wYPjI)

285 a jobs number? phoenixgirl?

i think they post em, with fancy fibalicious skills .

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (nqBYe)

286 can we get a jobs number? 4?

Posted by: rickb223 at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (GFM2b)

287

 

Poised for the Mother Of All Battles!

 

-Zombie Saddam Hussein

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (1Y+hH)

288 .

Posted by: Marcel Marceau at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (jucos)

289 What you inferior nutters fail to realize is that OUR president has no control over what happens in the economy. 

It hurts Him to have to remind you sub-people of your places.
 

Posted by: Jurdan at January 30, 2013 10:40 AM (EZl54)

290 CAC does your gallbladder stump get a prothesis? Posted by: Muad'dib is Fixin' to Have a Beer at January 30, 2013 02:34 PM (KjlbF) Sadly no. But I'm poised to get my prescription refilled. Wait.

Posted by: CAC at January 30, 2013 10:41 AM (DLXZb)

291 any.day.now.

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:41 AM (nqBYe)

292 284 Ms Puma,

and Boehner already got two big chips off the table with stability and the AMT fix...Ba-Rahn-Ko is gonna have to cave on entitlements.

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 10:41 AM (LRFds)

293

296

 

God, I hate mimes.

Posted by: jwest at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (ZDsRL)

294 I'm poised to unite this country!

Posted by: Barak Obama at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (Ag5D2)

295 294 can we get a jobs number?

  Well if it's a serious question those flunkies at ADP are projecting 192,000 new jobs for Jan. Of course they haven't been the most accurate...

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (9+ccr)

296 I'm poised to stop smoking!

Posted by: Barak Obama at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (Ag5D2)

297 I'm poised to hold back this shart.

Posted by: Al Roker at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (/ZZCn)

298

ee-ee

(Thump)
ee

(THUMP)
e

(THUMP, THUMP, THUMP)

Posted by: Posted by a Tuna Fisherman Who Hates Porpoises at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (uhftQ)

299

I'm poised to stop lighting strawmen.

 

Hey, anyone got a match?

Posted by: Barak Obama at January 30, 2013 10:42 AM (Ag5D2)

300 Hey PG!  Glad to see you okay.

We will get job numbers when Turbo Tax Timmy finishes counting his toes.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:43 AM (wYPjI)

301 Poised for justice...

Posted by: George Zimmerman and the Mohammed video guy at January 30, 2013 10:43 AM (TOk1P)

302
Poised for 500 handgun shooting deaths this year.

Posted by: Chicago at January 30, 2013 10:43 AM (p/cQy)

303 What you inferior nutters fail to realize is that OUR president has no control over what happens in the economy.

It hurts Him to have to remind you sub-people of your places.

Posted by: Jurdan at January 30, 2013 02:40 PM (EZl54)

 

Heh. Until and unless it does well. Then he gets ALL the credit.

 

(No worries there on our side.)

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:43 AM (1Y+hH)

304 I'm poised to take some swimming lessons...

Posted by: Ted Kennedy at January 30, 2013 10:43 AM (Ag5D2)

305 We are poised for something too.

Posted by: Israeli Defense Force at January 30, 2013 10:44 AM (mjR67)

306 Say  what  does  sequestration  (if  it takes  effect)  actually  cut?  I know a lot from Defense, but  what else, and what does it really cut from defense?

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:44 AM (gmeXX)

307 The Rs are poised to tear off a big chunk of that conservative latino vote.

Posted by: Invictus at January 30, 2013 10:44 AM (OQpzc)

308 I think we need Chicago control.

Wikipedia informs me they went on a "joint tour" last year with the Doobie Brothers.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 10:44 AM (ZKzrr)

309 Poised for not being a fucking ass!

Posted by: "Jordan" at January 30, 2013 10:44 AM (MMC8r)

310 This thread proves carney's comment is ridiculous:


anyone can claim to be 'poised' to do just about anything

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:45 AM (8sCoq)

311 File under sex with the hand.

Posted by: sTevo at January 30, 2013 10:45 AM (xdmzD)

312 I'm poised.   Okay.  Here I go.  Did anyone see it?

Posted by: Soona at January 30, 2013 10:45 AM (+8acg)

313 But I'm poised to get my prescription refilled.

Wait.

Posted by: CAC at January 30, 2013 02:41 PM (DLXZb)

 

You just need more deer antler extract. 

Posted by: Invictus at January 30, 2013 10:45 AM (OQpzc)

314

anyone can claim to be 'poised' to do just about anything

 

I  was  poised  to say the same thing.

Posted by: SH at January 30, 2013 10:45 AM (gmeXX)

315 I'm poised to stop smoking! Posted by: Barak Obama at January 30, 2013 02:42 PM (Ag5D2) --------------------------------------------------------- If anyone caught candid Barky at the inaugural parade knows that he hasn't quit smoking. He was chewing that gum so hard it looked like he was going to break his jaw.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at January 30, 2013 10:45 AM (jucos)

316

 

I'm poised for a record ski jump!

 

 

From the old "agony of defeat" clip. 

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (1Y+hH)

317 Doesn't Whoopi Goldberg have a commercial about something called 'Poised' or am I mistaken?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (wYPjI)

318 I'm poised to double down and not fold like a cheap hooker in the DR with Senator Menendez

Posted by: Speaker Boehner at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (F6KtL)

319 is that 40 minutes  300 comments?
i guess we are all seriously poised to find out 'what comes next'

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (nqBYe)

320 But I'm poised to get my prescription refilled.
---
Rub it in, why don't you?

Posted by: sTevo at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (xdmzD)

321 I'm poised to stop clicking "refresh" and do some actual work.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (ZKzrr)

322 Illinois budget officials say the state will delay today's planned sale of $500 million in construction bonds after a recent credit downgrade.







Illinois is poised to not be a shit state

Posted by: TheQuietMan at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (1Jaio)

323 Posted by: Marcel Marceau at January 30, 2013 02:40 PM (jucos)

I closed my eyes and didn't hear a thing you said.

Posted by: no good deed at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (mjR67)

324 If you aren't poised off, you aren't paying attention.

Posted by: Joe Mama at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (P4cxa)

325 I'm poised to be the best singer in the Les Miserables movie cast!

Posted by: Russell Crowe at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (Ag5D2)

326 Speaking of leftard sportsdouches, Mike Silver is on Rome's show now.

Posted by: logprof at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (jVAw4)

327 I'm still poised for scoring at my high school prom with Kate Upton!

Posted by: The Poster Formerly Known as Mr. Barky at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (qwK3S)

328

 

Poised to do the Macarena!

 

-Al Gore

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (1Y+hH)

329 314 SH,

It ios heavilt (too IMHO) focused on defense and nails discretionaries across the board at a lesser rate.

the "across the board cts" are 7.2-9.6% the Pentagons TRUE budget not the CRs withh take 11-13% medicare providers get nailed 2%

Now Donkey thinks he will "get oil subsidies" but somehow leave ethanol...

this is gonna be a fun, fun, fun fight.

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 10:46 AM (LRFds)

330 We need amnesty to get this economy roaring again!

Posted by: Jordum at January 30, 2013 10:47 AM (jVAw4)

331 I poised to take my nap...and not be around a few days...

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 10:47 AM (LRFds)

332 I'm poised to have a great NFL season this year

Posted by: Tim Tebow at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (F6KtL)

333 hehe if Ace cannot bring those left to the dark side, no one can keep it up, Sir

Posted by: beach grifter at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (LpQbZ)

334 An informal information session was held in my town at the little convention center, this in far far upstate NY, the topic being the new NY gun law. It was called a "forum." There to answer questions, was a colonel from the NY state police. I'll quote from the article, run loudly on the front page with a large color photo of those there in the crowd, and stupidly titled "A Shot at Understanding." The state cop official said, "he thinks that the new law will help police officers keep people safe."

Posted by: The littl shyning man at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (PH+2B)

335
Wouldn't God Save the Queen be more appropriate?

Posted by: SFGoth at January 30, 2013 02:39 PM (dZ756)

 

Heh.   The tune's identical, so why not?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (4df7R)

336
I'm poised to poise.

Posted by: Poiser at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (p/cQy)

337 I'm poised to double down and not fold like a cheap hooker in the DR with Senator Menendez

Posted by: Speaker Boehner at January 30, 2013 02:46 PM (F6KtL)

 

Kinda crazy the thing that pissed off the hookers here, and the FBI hookers is they got screwed out of their money.

Posted by: Invictus at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (OQpzc)

338 Wikipedia informs me they went on a "joint tour" last year with the Doobie Brothers. The President and Vice President?

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at the Joint Subcommittee meeting on the 50 yard line at January 30, 2013 10:48 AM (QF8uk)

339 So is Manti poised to have a real girlfriend?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (wYPjI)

340

 

Poised to stop the tides!

 

-King Canute

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (1Y+hH)

341 I'm poised to play for the Yankees.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (IDSI7)

342 347 MS Puma,

Yeth!

//Bawney Fwank

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (LRFds)

343 Super Bowl ad greatness... poised for it. 

Posted by: Kia at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (TOk1P)

344 this is gonna be a fun, fun, fun fight.

Posted by: sven10077 at January 30, 2013 02:46 PM (LRFds)

 

 

----------------------------------------------

 

 

Did someone say fight?  Ah, man!  Shit!

Posted by: Speaker Boner at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (+8acg)

345 I thought Jay Carnival was going to be replaced?

Last week I saw briefly the Clinton briefings of Benghazi while in Montana and enjoying snow. Then! Yesterday, in an airport somewhere (long day due to mechanical failure in Utah and blurring of day), Hillary was very cheerful on CNN with a brunette woman. She is going to sleep in retirement! Heck, it appears she has slept for four years. What has she been good for? Drinking? She has often seen double, do no know why she needs special prism glasses now.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky poised in fluid situation at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (baL2B)

346 Despite contraction, still poised for "recovery".

Posted by: Uranus at January 30, 2013 10:49 AM (P4cxa)

347

 

That's the whole problem, this administration is full of poisers.

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:50 AM (1Y+hH)

348 America voted for its own decline, a bad economy and "free stuff" from the producers.

Suck it, Obama voters.

Posted by: ok at January 30, 2013 10:50 AM (y1B+e)

349 waiting for this administration to do anything positive for the economy  is like waiting for your teenager to grow into a responsible adult.

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:50 AM (nqBYe)

350 I'm poised to take some swimming lessons...

Posted by: Ted Kennedy at January 30, 2013 02:43 PM (Ag5D2)

 

Driving lessons would have been better,   Teddy.

 

Though considering     where you are    at the moment,    i bet you'd LOVE to take a nice dip in a cold river right about now.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:50 AM (4df7R)

351 Poison "Every Rose has Its Thorn"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2r2nDhTzO4

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (8sCoq)

352 Poised to top the ratings this week. 

Posted by: Girls at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (TOk1P)

353 I've faced up to the fact that the government is merely reflecting what many voters want. We're turning into a nation of children. We demand to get what we want with no thought to the cost or consequences. Gimme, gimme, gimme, and let the rich guys pay for it. So where is the news media on the gawd-awful inflation in food prices? I'm glad those liberal bastards at the newspapers are losing their jobs. Let them try buying groceries when their income plummets. Maybe they'll think the Obama inflation is worth reporting then.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (EbE0l)

354 I'm poised to read something French.

Posted by: sTevo at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (xdmzD)

355

 

Those who vote for a living are poised to get paid by those who work for a living.

Posted by: Meremortal, watching it burn at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (1Y+hH)

356 65 I'm poised to give Eliza Dushku the old 'what for'...   ---   As i've aged, my 'what for' has evolved into   the old 'what two'   The old 'what one'   The old 'what was that thing we used to do?'
 

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (SO2Q8)

357 From Reuters.....Could be a leading economic indicator: J&J shops U.S. feminine pads unit, wants to keep K-Y: sources "

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at January 30, 2013 10:51 AM (l3vZN)

358 reagan's childhood chicago home to be demolished and become a parking lot for the scoamf's presidential library......lol we are dealing with one sick mf'er http://bit.ly/TXwMSU from the daily mail

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at January 30, 2013 10:52 AM (GVxQo)

359 Poised to wear poise undergarments. Little whiney baby america demands fwee stuff. Fwee stuff = economy suckage.

Posted by: ok at January 30, 2013 10:52 AM (y1B+e)

360 I am poised to take care of my 14 children without any government assistance.

Posted by: Octomom at January 30, 2013 10:52 AM (Ag5D2)

361 Old saying updated to today 's economy: Time is no money.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 30, 2013 10:52 AM (Qfumq)

362 Where's that photo of TFG with the shotgun where he's poised for picking up a double?

Posted by: Joe Mama at January 30, 2013 10:52 AM (P4cxa)

363
I'm poised to become more perky.

Posted by: Katie Couric at January 30, 2013 10:52 AM (ndqJC)

364 I'm poised to give you a bear hug.

Posted by: Def Leppard Drummer Rick Allen at January 30, 2013 10:53 AM (da5Wo)

365 reagan's childhood chicago home to be demolished and become a parking lot for the scoamf's presidential library......lol we are dealing with one sick mf'er

http://bit.ly/TXwMSU from the daily mail

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at January 30, 2013 02:52 PM (GVxQo)


wow that really does suck.

Posted by: ette at January 30, 2013 10:53 AM (nqBYe)

366
I'm poised to replace Miss Manners.

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at January 30, 2013 10:53 AM (ndqJC)

367 So poised to seeing the truth.

Posted by: See No Poise, Hear No Poise, Speak No Poise at January 30, 2013 10:53 AM (LpQbZ)

368

So where is the news media on the gawd-awful inflation in food prices?

 

 

Inflation?  Never heard of it!  Probably something better left to those masturbation advocating blogs.

Posted by: Charles Gibson at January 30, 2013 10:53 AM (Ag5D2)

369 Por poise

http://is.gd/vIpzwX

Posted by: Jones in CO at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (8sCoq)

370 reagan's childhood chicago home to be demolished and become a parking lot for the scoamf's presidential library......lol we are dealing with one sick mf'er

http://bit.ly/TXwMSU from the daily mail

Posted by: phoenixgirl

---------------------------

 

That's the commie way. Obliterate any traces of the enemy.

Posted by: Posted by a Tuna Fisherman Who Hates Porpoises at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (uhftQ)

371
J&J shops U.S. feminine pads unit, wants to keep K-Y: sources


"

Posted by: Jinx the Cat at January 30, 2013 02:51 PM (l3vZN)

 

"It was a lie!  Romney wasn't going     to outlaw    tampons!   HE WAS GOING    TO BAN      PADS!"

 

-Shrieking Leftwing Harridans

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (4df7R)

372 I'm poised to stop smoking! Posted by: Barak Obama Err, pole, that is. Not the Evil Tobacco.

Posted by: Barak Obami at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (FcR7P)

373

I've got like sixty thousand secret Masturbation Lottery tickets

---

might be time to buy a new sofa...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (SO2Q8)

374 We have turned into a nation of whiners.  Cops were at my door last night just after 11.  Bitch across the street called 911 cause there were some kids playing ding-dong-ditchem.  Freaking stupid.  Of course, as renters they aren't responsible for property taxes.

Posted by: Infidel at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (O/fK8)

375 Poised for my close-up, Mr. DeMille. 

Posted by: G. Swanson at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (TOk1P)

376 Oh, and when that buffoon Carney is eventually out of his white house job, he can get a job as a clown. Am I the only one that pictures him with gigantic shoes, a red nose, and a flower that squirts water in his buttonhole?

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (EbE0l)

377 I'm poised to win the masturbation lottery!

Posted by: Palin Steele at January 30, 2013 10:54 AM (Ag5D2)

378
I'm poised to speak out for something?

Posted by: Gabby Giffords at January 30, 2013 10:55 AM (ndqJC)

379 That's the commie way. Obliterate any traces of the enemy.

Posted by: Posted by a Tuna Fisherman Who Hates Porpoises at January 30, 2013 02:54 PM (uhftQ)


Also the Muz.

Posted by: Joe Mama at January 30, 2013 10:55 AM (P4cxa)

380

reagan's childhood chicago home to be demolished and
become a parking lot for the scoamf's presidential library

 

I read that this morning and got so angry I had to walk away from    my desk before I blew a gasket.   The rage continues to burn.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:55 AM (4df7R)

381 Poised... to take the Barbed Cock of Satan in the squeakhole... like he only does it to me

Posted by: Reggie Love at January 30, 2013 10:55 AM (Jls4P)

382 I still don't like Carneys.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at January 30, 2013 10:55 AM (p/cQy)

383 Poised for Rhett to come back  to Tara. 

Posted by: Scarlett at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (TOk1P)

384 I'm poised to make it through the second term without ending up in a stew.

Posted by: Bo, the Dog at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (EbE0l)

385
I'm poised for a triumphant comeback.

Posted by: Okra Winfrey at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (ndqJC)

386 388 reagan's childhood chicago home to be demolished and become a parking lot for the scoamf's presidential library

  Doubt they'll need much of a parking lot once he's out of office...

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (9+ccr)

387 Dow is doing great 13,950 capitalists are all happy, workers not so much. As the total cost of labor goes down record profits are still being broken

Posted by: occam at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (fbUla)

388 reagan's childhood chicago home to be demolished and become a parking lot for the scoamf's presidential library.

Presidential Library? Where a president's papers are kept? 

Why does he need a library?

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (ZKzrr)

389

FNC reporting the billions of birds and other wildlife domestic cats kill every year.  They're coming for our cats now. 

 

This shit is out of control.

Posted by: Speaker Boner at January 30, 2013 10:56 AM (+8acg)

390 I'm poised to lose some weight.

Posted by: Michael Moore at January 30, 2013 10:57 AM (mjR67)

391 @388. Read that as well, and reacted the same way. A fucking parking lot for TFG's Liberry and Choom Den? fuck you, Chicago!

Posted by: Pug Mahon at January 30, 2013 10:57 AM (K+mtQ)

392 PG, Chicago really hates Reagan doesn't it?  Like any thin skinned totalitarian despot of a banana republic, all reminders of any other great person must be removed post haste!  Strange timing that just last year they decided to deny the building protection.

Though the ultimate irony will be.  Univ. of Chicago buys and destroys the building.  Builds the parking lot.  And the Presidential Library gets built in Hawai'i.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 10:57 AM (wYPjI)

393 399 @388. Read that as well, and reacted the same way. A fucking parking lot for TFG's Liberry and Choom Den? fuck you, Chicago!

Posted by: Pug Mahon at January 30, 2013 02:57 PM (K+mtQ)


  Yeah, where is Mrs O'Learys cow when you need it?

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at January 30, 2013 10:57 AM (9+ccr)

394 Off drunken sot sock

Posted by: Soona at January 30, 2013 10:57 AM (+8acg)

395 Read that as well, and reacted the same way. A fucking parking lot for TFG's Liberry and Choom Den? fuck you, Chicago!

Posted by: Pug Mahon at January 30, 2013 02:57 PM (K+mtQ)



LiB

Posted by: Joe Mama at January 30, 2013 10:58 AM (P4cxa)

396 I'm poised for explosiveness too! Me too! Poised!

Posted by: Bob Menendez at January 30, 2013 10:58 AM (+GpbP)

397 Am I the only one that pictures him with gigantic shoes, a red nose, and a flower that squirts water in his buttonhole?

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 02:54 PM (EbE0l)

 

he'd    be one of the clowns with the painted-on frown    and a painted-on tear drop on his cheek.   And all the other clowns would constantly    kick him into buckets of whitewash.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit [/i][/u][/b] at January 30, 2013 10:58 AM (4df7R)

398 I'm poised to accept my Acedemy Award

Posted by: A. Swarzenegger at January 30, 2013 10:59 AM (SO2Q8)

399 Poised to catch Major Strasser's killer. 

Posted by: Louis Renault at January 30, 2013 10:59 AM (TOk1P)

400
I'm poised to grab all the guns.

Posted by: Joe O'Biden at January 30, 2013 10:59 AM (ndqJC)

401 FNC reporting the billions of birds and other wildlife domestic cats kill every year. They're coming for our cats now. **** they've been building up to this for a while now. I have six cats in my yard and they have killed a total of 1 bird in 6 months. Cats are seriously outnumbered and the suggestion that they are decimating the population of any particular species is asinine. Survival of the fittest.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at January 30, 2013 11:00 AM (piMMO)

402 Of course, as renters they aren't responsible for property taxes. 

Sure they are, just not directly.  I wish someone would explain that to more people.  Of course, I'm still waiting for folks to understand that corporations don't pay taxes.  I know they are poised for understanding.

Posted by: no good deed at January 30, 2013 11:00 AM (mjR67)

403 FNC reporting the billions of birds and other wildlife domestic cats kill every year.

"other wildlife" = disease-carrying vermin

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at January 30, 2013 11:00 AM (ZKzrr)

404 Jerry, it's not a lie if you really believe it!

Posted by: George Constanza at January 30, 2013 11:01 AM (RFeQD)

405 Like the Germans were poised to march on Washington after they bombed Pearl Harbor...

Posted by: Mjölnir, banhammer from the gates of Hell at January 30, 2013 11:01 AM (Jls4P)

406 I'm poised to lose some weight.

Posted by: Chrispy Kreme Christie at January 30, 2013 11:01 AM (NYnoe)

407 We aren't poised anymore.

Posted by: Israeli Defense Force at January 30, 2013 11:01 AM (mjR67)

408 Poised to stop Ruby from shooting the prisoner. 

Posted by: Dallas PD at January 30, 2013 11:02 AM (TOk1P)

409 hey've been building up to this for a while now.

I have six cats in my yard and they have killed a total of 1 bird in 6 months.

What a coincidence, I have six cats in my yard too.

They don't kill birds either, but they being buried three feet under might be a factor.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at January 30, 2013 11:02 AM (SY2Kh)

410 I'm poised to wear something tasteful.

Posted by: Nicki Minaj at January 30, 2013 11:03 AM (qE3AR)

411 We're poised to start being funny.

Posted by: Cast of SNL at January 30, 2013 11:04 AM (NYnoe)

412 So far my four cats have offered unto me various field mice and even a squirrel.  But never a bird.  They must be slipping or something.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at January 30, 2013 11:05 AM (wYPjI)

413 Egypt, Libya, Syria, Mali, Turkey, Jordan and Lebanon are all poised to enter a new and improved period.

Posted by: The Muslim Brotherhood and Barack Obama at January 30, 2013 11:07 AM (b9a6v)

414 "371 Where's that photo of TFG with the shotgun where he's poised for picking up a double? Posted by: Joe Mama" The white house is holding back that photo until they put the halo in.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 11:07 AM (EbE0l)

415 @markknoller says this is just a "slight contraction". Eight years ago he would have changed that slightly to "fucking disaster".

Posted by: higgi at January 30, 2013 11:07 AM (zLQ9q)

416 I'm "still poised" to nail Kate Upton.

Repeatedly.

Posted by: Tex Lovera at January 30, 2013 11:08 AM (wtvvX)

417 We should all start mailing boxes of "Poise" pads to the Whitehouse.  I'm "poised" to $#!+ my pants laughing. 

Posted by: Sam In VA at January 30, 2013 11:10 AM (rFiOs)

418 * = I can't be the only person totally annoyed with how this was literally the obama 2012 election campaign. right? He brought this up in each of the 4 debates (I mean, even Biden brought this up).

Posted by: joeindc44 is now more concerned about Dark Ages 2.0 than Great Depression 2.0 at January 30, 2013 02:08 PM (QxSug)


This was indeed his stated plan to bring the economy back up. More teachers + tax evil corporations more = economic success!

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at January 30, 2013 11:10 AM (xAtAj)

419 We are poised to report the news fairly and without bias and stop being toadies to the Democrat party.

Posted by: The MFM at January 30, 2013 11:11 AM (Ag5D2)

420 "Bitch across the street called 911 cause there were some kids playing ding-dong-ditchem. " Is ding-dong-ditchemn a euphemism for something dirty?

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 11:13 AM (EbE0l)

421 oops, ditchem-n

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 11:13 AM (EbE0l)

422 "Doubt they'll need much of a parking lot once he's out of office... Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at " Yes, they will. He's "the first black president". They're going to do everything short of canonizing him a saint. Don't be surprised if he gets a national holiday.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 11:16 AM (EbE0l)

423 Poised to make this landing

Posted by: Evil Knievel at January 30, 2013 11:17 AM (FIDMq)

424 And the Titanicss still poised to arrive in New York harbor.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - there on Thunder Island! at January 30, 2013 11:21 AM (hLRSq)

425 "We believe that the right course of action is to take steps to make sure that sequester doesnÂ’t happen because itÂ’s bad for the economy and bad overall for the effort to reduce our deficits in a reasonable way," Carney said Monday. And yet the SCoaMF signed the bill.

Posted by: toby928© for TB at January 30, 2013 11:21 AM (QupBk)

426 "Presidential Library? Where a president's papers are kept? Why does he need a library? Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer " Golf scores? Don't they keep track of their scores on little slips of paper. Those suckers will be historic documents. Also, there will be displays of the spent casings from all the shooting he did at Camp David. And best of all, lots of those overly posed photos of TFG. You know the ones, where he's looking thoughtfully off into the distance, pretending to be intelligent. The ones where he's looking all serious, but you just know he's really pondering how to improve his golf score now that it wouldn't look good to have that whore Tiger Woods give him pointers.

Posted by: nerdygirl at January 30, 2013 11:22 AM (EbE0l)

427 "FNC reporting the billions of birds and other wildlife domestic cats kill every year. They're coming for our cats now. " Cats are evil geniuses. And they mock me. Mock me I tell you. Wipe 'em off the face of the earth.

Posted by: nerdygirl's beagle at January 30, 2013 11:26 AM (EbE0l)

428 Poised???  So our plan is to wait around all poised n stuff for the recovery.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at January 30, 2013 11:48 AM (SkyIE)

429 Hey, electorate. Got news fer ya. You *did* build this.

Posted by: akula51 at January 30, 2013 12:02 PM (YesJa)

430 Secret Masterbation Lottery Tickets that Ace is accumulating in a crawl space, otherwise known as Kleenex.

Posted by: Live Free Or Die at January 30, 2013 12:16 PM (iBbpm)

431 Yeah, and i am poised to shoot rainbow colored skittles out my ass.


Posted by: jeremiah God Damn Barack Obama the Mother Fucking SCoaMF wright at January 30, 2013 12:22 PM (+OTLF)

432 Like the guy who hasn't got a hit in six months, we're due!

Posted by: PJ at January 30, 2013 12:52 PM (ZWaLo)

433 That entire Obama administration consists of nothing but idiots.

Posted by: rplat at January 30, 2013 01:28 PM (U/Ao5)

434 50th floor: so far, so good ...   30th floor: so far, so good .... 5th floor: so far, so good....

It's not how you fall, it's how you land that counts.

Posted by: Jay "Man Falling From a Tall Building" Carney at January 30, 2013 01:44 PM (Xv7f/)

435 430.  Yes, they will. He's "the first black president". They're going to do everything short of canonizing him a saint. Don't be surprised if he gets a national holiday.

***

Aircraft carrier, at least.  And a mountain.  And O'Hare airport.  Anything less is racist. 

Posted by: Ululator at January 30, 2013 01:50 PM (Xv7f/)

436 443 430. Yes, they will. He's "the first black president". They're going to do
everything short of canonizing him a saint. Don't be surprised if he
gets a national holiday.

***

Aircraft carrier, at least. And a mountain. And O'Hare airport. Anything less is racist.

***

The City of Chicago official flag has four stars on it.  There is room for more, they just haven't decided what it should symbolize.

Done.



Posted by: Aghast ye matey at January 30, 2013 01:55 PM (Xv7f/)

437 _______________________________

Ace,

Your Secret Masturbation Lottery jokes made me laugh so fucking hard, I started to cry.

Sometimes you're just the bomb, man. Damn.


Posted by: _Dave_ at January 30, 2013 02:02 PM (J+Q+d)

438 "I'm 'still poised' to win the special lottery they secretly enter you in every time you masturbate."

What makes me laugh at that Twitter post is that in reply to Uncle Facts' question, "Does it ever occur to you to ask serious questions that may actually be construed as 'journalism'?", Knoller says, "What question do you think should be asked but isnt?".

Seems pretty evident that if there are any serious questions that need asking, Knoller won't be asking them.

Posted by: Blacque Jacques Shellacque at January 30, 2013 02:21 PM (vd7A8)

439 I refer to Jay Carney as "The Mouth of Sauron" for all of you Lord of the Ring fans. He lies on such a regular basis that his mouth should be cleaned out with bleach after every press conference.

He says "X" and I know that "Y" is the truth. He has zero credibility just like his master.

Posted by: Braden Lynch at January 30, 2013 05:52 PM (vecNL)

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