Ace of Spades HQ

October 21, 2013

Request: Let's Keep Things Boring
— Ace

I ask this of both Guest Bloggers and commenters.

I didn't stress this enough to Guest Bloggers: My main goal this week is to have time off, not necessarily to have an interesting, provocative blog that gets high traffic.

These two things will frequently be in conflict, because the edgier and more provocative a post is, the edgier and more provocative comments will be, and that means the cobloggers (who all have day jobs and are just stealing time here and there, fifteen minutes a break) have to get more involved with Guest Blog posts, and that means, ultimately, I have to get more involved myself, because it's not fair to ask them to do so much more work just so that I can have a day off.

But this means that I wind up not having time off, as I'm making judgment calls in the coblogger coordination thread, and writing to guest bloggers, and so on.

The rule against provocative and edgy stuff will result in a vanilla week of blogging. But that's exactly what I want. If it's not vanilla, then I actually don't have time off, and I might as well just be writing the posts myself. Editing is rewriting, after all.

If you have a post you're not sure about, please pitch it to a coblogger before you do any work on it. This will save you from wasting your time if they say "Nah."

And they will probably say "Nah." The cobs this week have similar incentives to a business' lawyers. Ever ask a lawyer if you can do something? He almost always says "No." Because "No" is the easiest possible answer. "Yes, but..." requires him to do a lot of work digging up the exact limits of what's legally permissible. He'd rather just say "No."

And so that's why lawyers just say "No you can't do that." They're trying to make their lives as easy as possible.

Which is the right way for the cobloggers to play it.

With me off (in theory), the cobs are already doing a lot more work than usual with regard to posting content and monitoring threads and trollbusting and so forth. Please don't make additional work for them -- that defeats the whole point of the Open Blogger thing. The whole point of asking guest bloggers to post is to lighten the cobloggers' workload, not add to it.

Edgier type stuff can be pitched to me when I'm back from vacation. Then I won't mind so much thinking about a topic or suggesting edits to a writer.

And I do understand that provocative writing is often interesting writing. But interesting writing requires me to do what I do not wish to do this week, which is work, write, edit, make judgment calls, troubleshoot questions, and patrol threads.

I really only get to be off when things are pretty vanilla, uncontroversial, and drama-free. Please help me out with this. I'm not shooting for the Most Exciting Week of blogging ever. I'm really shooting for the Least Exciting Week of blogging ever, because the Least Exciting Week of blogging ever means I get to spend the most amount of time napping.

I'm shooting for a genuine week off, more or less. That's my ideal. I'd love to just check in with the coblogger coordination thread and see "No issues" every day. If there are several issues each day, that means I'm not really taking a day off; it just means I'm working half-days, behind the scenes.

Another way to put it: When the Boss is off, it's not the time for Exciting New Product Rollouts or Aggressive Entries Into New Markets. It's time for caretaking.

Remember, we do post guest blog posts all the time, when I'm not on vacation. So anything provocative can be pitched as a post... next week. This week, I want a week of not working.

I want an Obama Week. I guess that's my real goal: I want a week of watching TV and doing practically nothing, just like our President has 40 weeks a year. Maybe even some golf.

Posted by: Ace at 12:43 PM | Comments (283)
Post contains 695 words, total size 4 kb.

1 No Syria posts?

Posted by: wooga at October 21, 2013 12:48 PM (972Xo)

Shouldn't there be an open thread for political banter below this thread?

I kid, I kid. Please don't ban me.

Posted by: Austin in TX at October 21, 2013 12:48 PM (lKVc4)

3 I think I may be getting the flu. I am sure your week will be better than mine.

Posted by: Jmel at October 21, 2013 12:49 PM (cfFqn)

4 So just close the site for a week. Just say you're calling in the tech cavalry to fix registration issues. And post a fake phone number for us to call for any questions or concerns.

Posted by: NotCoach at October 21, 2013 12:49 PM (rsudF)

5 So you want POTUS's sex life when Reggie is out of town?

Posted by: Lemmenkainen, Freelance Warlord at October 21, 2013 12:49 PM (ZWvOb)

6 (pulls up cover song thread for a quick update...)

Posted by: wiserbud at October 21, 2013 12:50 PM (NXg/k)

7 >>>So just close the site for a week. Just say you're calling in the tech cavalry to fix registration issues. And post a fake phone number for us to call for any questions or concerns. that's not an awful idea but one always worries, "Will people come back?" Plus, that's a whole week of nearly zero revenue.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 12:50 PM (/IWYB)

8 Wait what?! I finally finish my Honest Discussion About Race and you're at home playing with your Xbox?

Posted by: Fen at October 21, 2013 12:50 PM (a422o)

Try mini-golf while half in the bag. It's fun.

Posted by: Barman at October 21, 2013 12:50 PM (PaKLC)

10 I have considered the idea of just officially shutting the blog down for a week, and giving everyone (including the cobs) a genuine week off. But it's a chancy thing.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 12:50 PM (/IWYB)

11 Would be nice if Choom Boy, Congress and the rest of the fuckweasels that inhabit D.C. see it your way, Ace.

Maybe we could get teh Muzzies to cool it 'til next week, too.

In fact, let all of 'em go the hell away and make the world safe for normal, G*d-fearing human beings.

Then you could come back and regale us with a string of movie reviews!

Posted by: MrScribbler at October 21, 2013 12:50 PM (kaGpp)

12 I don't always blog but when I do it's boring. p.s. just kidding, enjoy the week off Ace, you've earned it. mean it seriously, not in a n eddie haskell way though

Posted by: Ace, The Most Boring Blogger in the World at October 21, 2013 12:51 PM (RGgMp)

13 Every thread should be about tittehs,Problem solved.

Posted by: steevy at October 21, 2013 12:51 PM (zqvg6)

14 Dammit. My Dino/Alien/Nano/Treebeard erotica post is off, I guess.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here)-also drooling imbecile incapable of doing algebra or something at October 21, 2013 12:52 PM (659DL)

15 Mmmm. Vanilla.

I always like the recipe threads.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 12:52 PM (/kI1Q)

awwww, how come we can't have nice stuff?

Enjoy your week off, Ace.

Posted by: Havedash at October 21, 2013 12:52 PM (F0WNa)

17 Every thread should be about tittehs,Problem solved. Posted by: steevy at October 21, 2013 04:51 PM

No, just 75% of them.

The rest should be about kittehs.

Posted by: MrScribbler at October 21, 2013 12:52 PM (kaGpp)

18 Happy vacation Ace, enjoy!

Posted by: prescient11 at October 21, 2013 12:52 PM (tVTLU)

19 Just make it a football thread, then!

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (IXrOn)

20 Vanilla it is. I'm sorry you haven't been able to enjoy some down-time.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (DmNpO)

Anybody here like Political Conservatism?

How about kitties (or puppies, if you prefer?)

Posted by: Vanilla Commenter at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (2ESh+)

22 Here's a good laugh for your vacation. When you've lost the onion.... (link in sig)

Posted by: Lauren at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (ELdpj)

23 If you want beautiful vanilla (stuff where you say "Oooh, Sweet," instead of "Oooh Shit", I can send you links to my blog. Travel & Photography roughly three times a week. The blog is at the URL link above (FerryTrails). Bill

Posted by: Bill Ferry at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (kCXjW)

24 Vanilla is my favorite flavor.

Posted by: steevy at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (zqvg6)

25 Vanilla? That's racist.

Posted by: Ray "Choco-town" Nagan at October 21, 2013 12:53 PM (p2s4o)

26 (racks brain for the most boring topic...Ah!)

What are the main uses of symbolism in Waiting For Godot?

Posted by: Splunge at October 21, 2013 12:54 PM (bKA83)

27 #22 Here's a good laugh for your vacation. When you've lost the onion.... (link in sig) -- love it!

Posted by: Ace, The Most Boring Blogger in the World at October 21, 2013 12:54 PM (RGgMp)

28 So I guess anal is out of the question.

Posted by: Lets B. Frank at October 21, 2013 12:54 PM (wmU4G)

29 I thought the blog was humming along just fine....didn't even notice any trolls. Must be something going on behind the scene.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami - GO CARDS - WOOHOO!!! at October 21, 2013 12:55 PM (bCEmE)

30 The rule against provocative and edgy stuff will result in a vanilla week of blogging. But that's exactly what I want. Can we do butter pecan?

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 12:55 PM (KvM9d)

31 So just close the site for a week. Just say you're calling in the tech cavalry to fix registration issues. And post a fake phone number for us to call for any questions or concerns. ---------------- In other words, pretend it's the Obamacare website.

Posted by: flmom at October 21, 2013 12:55 PM (nSjrf)

32 How about a Vanilla recipes thread?

Posted by: lindafell at October 21, 2013 12:55 PM (PGO8C)

33 I took the weekend off (for my birthday). Turned off the phones. Didn't get on the computer. Didn't do laundry. Didn't even make my bed.

I actually have the opportunity to do that 52 times a year, because I don't have to accomplish important things like oversee the best blog on the internet. I wish you a happy week off, Ace.

Posted by: kathyssaysso at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (6H6o8)

34 This Is Just To Say
by William Carlos Williams

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious.
Sort of Blogging VÃ©ritÃ©. Next we'll have a sound file playing the clacking of Ace's keyboard.

so sweet
and so cold

Posted by: Cretin, high grade moron isotopes in thousands of centrifuges at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (tfSla)

35 Ewoks play golf?

Posted by: dantesed at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (0NHZO)

36 Can we do butter pecan? We can go as far as pralines and cream. No more.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here)-also drooling imbecile incapable of doing algebra or something at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (659DL)

37 Just to be public-spirited, I'm going to suggest a post:

Watching paint dry.

When we bought our house, we immediately painted it a nice, neutral shade of blue-gray. Unfortunately, it was too close to the color the house was previously (which had been just a touch less gray) -- and the new color's wet color was nearly identical to the old color's dry and faded color -- so the first coat, when it dried, missed a bunch of spots and really looked bad. This made it so that we ended up having to put three coats of paint on the house when the plan had been two.

I guess the lesson in this is that, when you do a thing to make a difference, you should really make a difference.

Posted by: cthulhu at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (T1005)

38 We'll aim to make our comments as bland as a Nilla Wafer, Chief Ewok.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (XrGnJ)

39 >>>Let's Keep Things Boring<<<

I'm thinking Vikings vs. Giants level of boring. Or is that way over the top?

Posted by: Fritz at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (UzPAd)

40 I'm so edgy, my pant creases have creases

sharp creases...

Posted by: Michael J Pollard at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (omBWL)

41 Mmmm. Vanilla. I always like the recipe threads. Just add Kaluha.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 12:56 PM (KvM9d)

42 just post pictures from around the web and put "caption contest" --- works for Free Republic on slow news days....

Posted by: Nora at October 21, 2013 12:57 PM (RGgMp)

43 Baby steps. Baby step through the posting. Baby step through the commenting. Baby steps, baby steps...Hey, it works!

Posted by: Bob at October 21, 2013 12:57 PM (ZshNr)

44 Now, Ace, don't be a "hover" blogger. You go out there an' red-line that fun-meter!

Posted by: Cretin, high grade moron isotopes in thousands of centrifuges at October 21, 2013 12:57 PM (tfSla)

45 17 Every thread should be about tittehs,Problem solved.

Posted by: steevy at October 21, 2013 04:51 PM

No, just 75% of them.

The rest should be about kittehs.

Posted by: MrScribbler at October 21, 2013 04:52 PM (kaGpp)

There ya go -- change the masthead to "Kittehs and Tittehs" for the time Ace is off.

Posted by: cthulhu at October 21, 2013 12:57 PM (T1005)

46 Mmmm. Vanilla. I always like the recipe threads. Posted by: HeatherRadishÂ™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 04:52 PM (/kI1Q) hehe, yea, me too Just spent the entire day cooking since the weather is so bad, and I had the time. Two quiches (spinach & mushrooms and spinach, goat cheese, and sundried tomatoes) and a kitchen sink chicken pot pie. We are set for two weeks! I missed the cookbook thread a couple weekends ago...

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (IXrOn)

47 This comment is so boring it makes Kaboom! seem socially dangerous.

Posted by: ObjectionSustained at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (oP5gc)

48 The duller the posts, the more time Ace has to read the stuff porn stars put on Twitter and Tumblr

Please be considerate

Posted by: kbdabear at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (aTXUx)

49 Public radio boring or waiting room boring?

Posted by: dananjcon at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (wmU4G)

50 Oh, goody, now I can post and not feel ashamed of my blandness. Speaking of vanilla....I had three....yes, three, of those wonderful Blue Bell vanilla ice cream cups this morning. Yummy!!

Posted by: Moron of Morgoth at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (CYS6Q)

51 Let's have a haiku war.

Posted by: kathyssaysso at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (6H6o8)

52 Can we do butter pecan?

Now I need cake.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (/kI1Q)

53 I finally met the Perfect Girl

A girl I just adore

She's dead and dumb and oversexed

and owns a liquor store

Posted by: Woody Woodbury ( dead comedian ) at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (omBWL)

54 Ace, I'm surprised you don't have canned pieces to throw up when you're gone. I'm sure a movie review wouldn't swing for you since you like to go back and forth discussing those. But, other things...

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 12:58 PM (IXrOn)

55 So basically we need to make this site East Germany for a week? Sounds like a plan. *Gets into my 1975 Trabant and drives away*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6AaIc9YWw4

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (BF+2f)

56 Now, Ace, don't be a "hover" blogger. You go out there an' red-line that fun-meter! If you don't tour the drunk tank, it wasn't really a vacation!

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (KvM9d)

57 Be honest, Ace. You're going to Washington DC to consult with obama on how to fix the website, amirite? I've heard 404care has a rich text problem.

Posted by: Havedash at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (F0WNa)

58 "deaf", not dead

although....

Posted by: Woody Woodbury ( dead comedian ) at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (omBWL)

59 Obamacare fail Operator don't answer Can't even log-in

Posted by: Bob at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (ZshNr)

60 that's not an awful idea but one always worries, "Will people come back?" Plus, that's a whole week of nearly zero revenue. Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 04:50 PM (/IWYB) I would come back. We can all decompress togetha!

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (IXrOn)

61 21 people lit on fire for world record http://t.co/ogG6iENMLk

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (DmNpO)

62 I don't often read blogs, but when I do, I read AoSHQ when he's on vacation.

Stay timid my friends.

Posted by: The Least Interresting Man in the World at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (/C6Mj)

63 Public radio boring or waiting room boring? Elevator muszak boring...

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 12:59 PM (KvM9d)

64 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhiCFdWeQfA

Posted by: Boycott Las Vegas! at October 21, 2013 01:00 PM (QgAFR)

65 I'd give a lot for boring right now. Real, serious, hardcore boring. Makes white bread look exotic boring. No-holds-unbarred, plenty-of-limits, makes Ben Stein look like a maniac bored to tears. I'm totally on board with this.

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:00 PM (qyfb5)

66 You won't have to worry about any provocative comments from me the rest of the week as I am going to pull an Obama and go on a four day golf and gambling trip. I will let the morons buy me dinner for the whole trip or pay double for it. I will put a hundred on black or red depending on the concensus in the next 20 comments.

Posted by: polynikes at October 21, 2013 01:00 PM (m2CN7)

67 You know what band do when they want low risk -- greatest hits albums.

Maybe bump some of the old humor pieces.

I thought that thing about the Sasquatch years ago scratching itself with tree branches was hilarious.

Posted by: Purp[/i][/b][/u][/s] at October 21, 2013 01:00 PM (l5zzX)

68 Ted Cruz sends his best wishes.

Posted by: Tom Servo at October 21, 2013 01:00 PM (8Fa5Z)

69 Sock off

Posted by: Lincolntf at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (ZshNr)

70 This is pretty boring-but sweet. Cute animal photos: http://tinyurl.com/yd4lmsn

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (23Kgq)

71 Ace of Spades -- the preferred blog of three-toed sloths everywhere.

Posted by: ObjectionSustained at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (oP5gc)

72 Real, serious, hardcore boring.

TWSS

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (/kI1Q)

73 Hey Mr O'Spades

This might be of interest to you

http://tinyurl.com/lfdjauo

Either way, just call me Johnny Vanilla, and have a good vacation.

We'll leave the light on for ya'.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (OuGy9)

If you really wanted time off, just ask.

Hand me the keys and relax. I'll keep an eye on things and maybe, just maybe, this place would function a bit better by the time you get back.

Hey, trust me.

Posted by: jwest at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (u2a4R)

75 "I'm really shooting for the Least Exciting Week of blogging ever" You do realize that you are daring the Iranians to conduct a nuclear test this week, don't you?

Posted by: Boycott Las Vegas! at October 21, 2013 01:01 PM (QgAFR)

76 need a flamwar week

Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (vJdyz)

77 I call for an online hacky-sack tournament!

Posted by: MrScribbler at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (kaGpp)

78 I've heard 404care has a rich text problem.

Posted by: Havedash at October 21, 2013 04:59 PM (F0WNa)

Will the 404care site permit ampersands? That is the REAL question.

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (BF+2f)

79 McCain - wacko bird
Romney - a big giant douche
The country is screwed.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (QdOC1)

80 My mother-in-law retelling her 1950s camp stories boring or visiting professor with heavy accent and lisp boring? [whoever started this is awesome]

Posted by: Nora at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (RGgMp)

81 read my speeches

knock you right out, they will

Posted by: Rick Santorum at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (omBWL)

82 Don't shoot me for lamely posting links, but here's an even more shocking anti-obama onion piece. (in sig)

Posted by: Lauren at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (ELdpj)

83 that's not an awful idea but one always worries, "Will people come back?" Come back? Hell, never left. Be hitting the refresh bar like a monkey on crack for a week...

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (KvM9d)

84 Speaking of speaking of vanilla. My parents went on a a Mexican cruise for their 40th anniversary and brought me back no-alcohol pure vanilla extract. That stuff is *awesome*. There really is a difference in flavor from the standard grocery store stuff.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (Pexsc)

85 This is pretty boring-but sweet. Cute animal photos: *** cute overload!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (DmNpO)

86 Didya miss me?

Posted by: Vanilla Ice at October 21, 2013 01:02 PM (NXg/k)

87 I was told if I like a blog, I could keep my blog...

Lying bastards all.

Posted by: Bruce at October 21, 2013 01:03 PM (rZI6o)

88 So, I'm making Chicken Pot Pies for my clients this week. I cook something different every Thursday. So far, I'm making 4 with 2 special request, one with no peas and one vegetarian. Is everyone asleep yet?

Posted by: lindafell at October 21, 2013 01:03 PM (PGO8C)

89 I know, let's help the guest bloggers out by offering boring subjects to them

Joe Biden's dental history

The Chevy Cruz owner's manual

NBC Overnight tv schedule

Posted by: kbdabear at October 21, 2013 01:03 PM (aTXUx)

90 Madagascar Bourbon Pure Vanilla Bean Paste yum

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 01:03 PM (IXrOn)

91 Ace will have to make a comment now and then to create an alibi to use when Johnny Law comes a-knocking about the decrease in the hobo population.

Posted by: kathyssaysso at October 21, 2013 01:04 PM (6H6o8)

92 $50 on red, $50 on black...

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:04 PM (KvM9d)

93 I was told if I like a blog, I could keep my blog... Lying bastards all. Posted by: Bruce at October 21, 2013 05:03 PM (rZI6o) I laughed. Perfect.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 01:04 PM (IXrOn)

94 I can do a post on the intricate differences between different BSDM fetishes

Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 01:04 PM (vJdyz)

95 No one wanted to participate in my roulette dealings so green it is. So long jackwagaons.

Posted by: polynikes at October 21, 2013 01:04 PM (m2CN7)

96 Another one:

The Grass is Growing!

We have been working with folks in North Carolina recently, and they seem surprised at how much you have to water your lawn during a California summer, just to keep it alive. Around this time of year, when it cools off a bit and you actually get a bit of dew in the mornings, the grass starts to really take off because it's not just in survival mode. Then, in the winter, it starts to slow down again from the cold, but you have to mow frequently or the lawn gets covered by fallen leaves and the grass all dies.

I should mow my lawn.

Posted by: cthulhu at October 21, 2013 01:04 PM (T1005)

97 Vanilla Blog...I heard them open up for Mother's Finest back in the day.

Posted by: Havedash at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (F0WNa)

98 I'm...so...happy.

This...sounds...like...my...kinda...place.

Posted by: Droopy Dog at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (/C6Mj)

99 Somebody should put up a movie review of "How to Make an American Quilt" or "Empire (1964)." Maybe a low-salt food thread.

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (qyfb5)

100 84 Speaking of speaking of vanilla. My parents went on a a Mexican cruise for their 40th anniversary and brought me back no-alcohol pure vanilla extract. That stuff is *awesome*. There really is a difference in flavor from the standard grocery store stuff.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at October 21, 2013 05:02 PM (Pexsc)

OMG that is the best stuff. Put it in anything and suddenly your confectionaries go from yummy to decadent. Mmmmmm...

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (BF+2f)

101 Even more boring than the MSM assignment desk editor who handles stories critical of the the White House?

Posted by: ObjectionSustained at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (oP5gc)

102 Speaking of speaking of vanilla. My parents went on a a Mexican cruise for their 40th anniversary and brought me back no-alcohol pure vanilla extract. That stuff is *awesome*. There really is a difference in flavor from the standard grocery store stuff. $9.99/qt at the Embarcadero in San Antonio.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (KvM9d)

103 Welcome to Fun With Flags

Posted by: Sheldon Cooper at October 21, 2013 01:05 PM (aTXUx)

104 I had nine surgeries in 3.5 years. Any takers, it's super boring...cures insomnia with no side effects. anyone? I'm smelling a guest post....

Posted by: Nora at October 21, 2013 01:06 PM (RGgMp)

105 Back in the day, the Navy was able to keep its most successful acquisition program off everybody's radar lest the politicos in congress and the 3rd floor get their fingers in it. The nuclear carrier program delivered every ship on time and on budget; with minimal rework. Of course, we did not have computers and building nuclear powered aircraft carriers is a lot simpler than building a functioning website. Just trying to be boring.

Posted by: VADM (Red) Cuthbert Collingwood (Mentioned in Despatches) at October 21, 2013 01:06 PM (O7OxF)

106

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 05:05 PM (KvM9d)

just cheaper to buy vanilla pods

Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 01:06 PM (vJdyz)

107 Damn that Ace of Spades is boring this week

Posted by: Maytag Repairman at October 21, 2013 01:06 PM (RGgMp)

108 This is a parody Healthcare site done by Rex Harrison's hat (a moron).....too funny! Try to 'apply now'.... http://tinyurl.com/lpj2kjq

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami - GO CARDS - WOOHOO!!! at October 21, 2013 01:06 PM (bCEmE)

109 Oh, yes, yes, yes. Mexican Vanilla is the bestest. There's an icecream shop here in town that makes a Mexican Vanilla icecream that is the best thing in the world. In fact, I'm now thinking about being the bestest mom ever and taking my kids to go get it. I blame the ewok.

Posted by: Lauren at October 21, 2013 01:07 PM (ELdpj)

110 In the world of IT management, managing programmers is described as herding cats.

So it sounds like managing guest bloggers is like herding mangy, flea infested weasels with bad cases of halitosis and distemper.

Because everyone knows, cats are a member of the weasel family.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 21, 2013 01:08 PM (wNF3N)

111 http://www.worldsmostboringwebsite.com/

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:08 PM (BF+2f)

112 Polliwog, I like using real vanilla beans in recipes. those little black specks just seems to add something special to dishes.

Posted by: lindafell at October 21, 2013 01:08 PM (PGO8C)

113 Basket-weaving thread. Just remember to put up a secondary "politics of suburban sidewalk repair" thread for those not into basket weaving.

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:08 PM (qyfb5)

114 Public radio boring or waiting room boring? Elevator muszak boring... ------------------ Lili Von Schtupp boring!

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:08 PM (dfYL9)

115 Moscow in flames, missiles heading for New York... Film at 11.

Posted by: Boycott Las Vegas! at October 21, 2013 01:09 PM (QgAFR)

116 Lauren, I'll race you to Amy's

Posted by: lindafell at October 21, 2013 01:09 PM (PGO8C)

117 This is how Ace wants it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e8PGPrPlwA

Posted by: kbdabear at October 21, 2013 01:09 PM (aTXUx)

118 Everyone should mention what's in their fridge, a stable of early boring-blogging. I'll start: not a lot.

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:09 PM (qyfb5)

119 Compare & discuss: Trabant or Yugo.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (KvM9d)

120 >>> thought the blog was humming along just fine....didn't even notice any trolls. Must be something going on behind the scene. yes it was all saved to draft so no problem actually occurred. However, I did realize that I had never told anyone what I just wrote in the above post -- I guess I was counting on people Psychically Reading My Mind. But of course there's no such thing as Psychically Reading Someone's Mind. So I thought, to save people work (why write a post that won't be posted?), it's best to just state what had been unstated.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (/IWYB)

121 Have you ever heard me talk? You could do a series of posts on this topic.

Posted by: Steny Hoyer at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (RGgMp)

122

(Haiku Pattern: 5-7-5)

First Too Much Drinking
Next Forgetted My Grammer
And Down Goes Frasier

Posted by: Haiku Warrior at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (2ESh+)

123 Shall I teach you to count to 100 in Japanese?

Drone after me:

Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, locu....

Posted by: kathyssaysso at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (6H6o8)

124 Posted by: LizLem at October 21,2013 05:05 PM (BF+2f) Absolutely! I was really sceptical since I was already using "real" vanilla, but the lack of alcohol burn means it's almost good enough to just drink straight. Afraid I'll never be able to go back to standard vanilla extract.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette, assault Hobbit at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (Pexsc)

125 " Lauren, I'll race you to Amy's " Mini moron meetup? Let's do this thing (totally seriously, I want icecream!)

Posted by: Lauren at October 21, 2013 01:10 PM (ELdpj)

126 Everyone should mention what's in their fridge, a stable of early boring-blogging. I'll start: not a lot. Lots of chili meat. Chili cookoff Friday at work.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:11 PM (KvM9d)

127 Did someone say they wanted excitement?
Hot, pulse pounding excitement?
Not for the faint of heart.

Autostart warning

http://tinyurl.com/l9wn7au

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at October 21, 2013 01:11 PM (OuGy9)

128 118 Everyone should mention what's in their fridge, a stable of early boring-blogging. I'll start: not a lot. Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith at October 21, 2013 05:09 PM (qyfb5) Ok, then next we'll do a keyboard shake out. Compare crumbs.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami - GO CARDS - WOOHOO!!! at October 21, 2013 01:11 PM (bCEmE)

129 Baking soda vs White Vinegar: fight over which is best to clean a stove

Posted by: Helpful Henrietta at October 21, 2013 01:11 PM (RGgMp)

130 Thread ideas: Dialtones From Around The World A Brief History of Diesel-Electric Generators The Variety and Active Interplay of North Korean Elections, with Video Farming in Real Time, or Let's Start With Dirt

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:11 PM (qyfb5)

131 not to be a gaywad touchy-feeley liberal, but I do think that we create a lot of problems by not communicating. I did not communicate before what I just wrote above. So people didn't know. I created a problem by not communicating. So I'm trying to solve that problem by communicating. I think people are trying to think of Really Interesting Posts -- which is perfectly understandable. They want the blog to be good, after all. But I never before spelled out that "interesting," when it drifts into Troublesome Areas Fraught With Verbal Peril, actually creates a great deal of work for everyone.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:12 PM (/IWYB)

132 123 Shall I teach you to count to 100 in Japanese?

Drone after me:

Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, locu....

Posted by: kathyssaysso at October 21, 2013 05:10 PM (6H6o

Shouldn't that be, won, too, free, fuuh, ...?

Posted by: Havedash at October 21, 2013 01:12 PM (F0WNa)

133 Beige beige beige beige
Even if you add some white
Beige beige beige beige

Posted by: Vanilla Haiku at October 21, 2013 01:12 PM (6H6o8)

134 Baking soda vs White Vinegar: fight over which is best to clean a stove Both! At the same time!

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:13 PM (KvM9d)

135 Everyone should mention what's in their fridge, a stable of early boring-blogging.

Mostly beer. And a drawer full of cheese.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 01:13 PM (/kI1Q)

136 My mother-in-law retelling her 1950s camp stories boring...? What kind of camp? Band camp?

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b] at October 21, 2013 01:13 PM (sByIH)

137 crap, my husband's home and wants to spend time together. continue be boring without me

Posted by: Helpful Henrietta at October 21, 2013 01:13 PM (RGgMp)

138 yes it was all saved to draft so no problem actually occurred. However, I did realize that I had never told anyone what I just wrote in the above post -- I guess I was counting on people Psychically Reading My Mind. But of course there's no such thing as Psychically Reading Someone's Mind. So I thought, to save people work (why write a post that won't be posted?), it's best to just state what had been unstated. Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:10 PM (/IWYB) Ah....well, not to worry. Everyone has moved on the Mexican vanilla.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami - GO CARDS - WOOHOO!!! at October 21, 2013 01:13 PM (bCEmE)

139 A Brief History of Diesel-Electric Generators

Could actually be interesting, but potentially controversial.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 01:14 PM (/kI1Q)

140 Ok, then next we'll do a keyboard shake out. Compare crumbs. Posted by: Tami - GO CARDS - WOOHOO!!! at October 21, 2013 05:11 PM (bCEmE) Hide posts from (bCEmE) Keyboard cleaning thread? I could link to that "Twenty Four Hours of the Star Trek Enterprise Background Hum" video: http://youtu.be/ZPoqNeR3_UA

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:15 PM (qyfb5)

141 Ace
It's now a meme.
And if there is any single group of people capable of fixating on a meme...
It's Morons.

Could turn out to be a good thread.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at October 21, 2013 01:15 PM (OuGy9)

142 @NewsBreaker JUST IN: Navy officers arrested for trading secret data for prostitutes http://tinyurl.com/le8kg9c (Ok, where's 'Nevergiveup'?)

Posted by: [/i][/b][/u][/s] Tami - GO CARDS - WOOHOO!!! at October 21, 2013 01:15 PM (bCEmE)

143 "Butter vs. Margerine: the pros and cons" is in the rough draft stage right now.

Posted by: Dave S. at October 21, 2013 01:15 PM (3R0Zs)

144 The late night troll smiting business has been very brisk of late.

Something has been jazzing them the past couple of weeks.

Posted by: Purp[/i][/b][/u][/s] at October 21, 2013 01:15 PM (l5zzX)

145 Someone with more pull than me tell ace to go on and go on vacation and relax. We won't trash our second home. Much.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:16 PM (KvM9d)

146 133 Beige beige beige beige
Even if you add some white
Beige beige beige beige

Posted by: Vanilla Haiku at October 21, 2013 05:12 PM (6H6o

Heh.

Posted by: cthulhu at October 21, 2013 01:16 PM (T1005)

147 Ecru, eggshell, or Dover white? Discuss.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:16 PM (dfYL9)

148 Could actually be interesting, but potentially controversial. Posted by: HeatherRadishÂ™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 05:14 PM (/kI1Q) Hide posts from (/kI1Q) Obviously by "brief" I actually meant "droning on for hours in mind-numbing detail, with slides."

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:16 PM (qyfb5)

149 "Butter vs. Margerine: the pros and cons"

That one might get violent. Filthy oleofuckers.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 01:17 PM (/kI1Q)

150 How about a daily triage of Obamacare interface anomalies level of boring followed up with an afternoon projected code correction milestones discussion and a few random fishbone diagrams level of boring?

Posted by: Fritz at October 21, 2013 01:17 PM (UzPAd)

151 Ecru, eggshell, or Dover white? Discuss. Um, chocolate.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:17 PM (KvM9d)

152 A raven in flight,
Or raven on a gut-pile:
No less beguiling

Posted by: Cretin, high grade moron isotopes in thousands of centrifuges at October 21, 2013 01:17 PM (tfSla)

153 "Butter vs. Margerine: the pros and cons" That one might get violent. Filthy oleofuckers. Posted by: HeatherRadishÂ™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 05:17 PM (/kI1Q) haha

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 01:18 PM (IXrOn)

154 margarine automatically wins as it doesn't burn your donger when you're sunbathing in the nude

Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 01:19 PM (vJdyz)

155 Um, chocolate. Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 05:17 PM (KvM9d) troll!!!

Posted by: lindafell at October 21, 2013 01:19 PM (PGO8C)

156 Oh God mine eyes! Hillary Clinton in a pantsuit. Blind is preferrable.

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:20 PM (KvM9d)

157 Slit that hobo's throat.
Watch him bleed his life away
Until he is ecru.

Posted by: Vanilla Haiku at October 21, 2013 01:20 PM (6H6o8)

158 Um, chocolate. Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 05:17 PM (KvM9d) troll!!! Mmmmmmm. Troll House Cookies!

Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 01:21 PM (KvM9d)

159 So, obama, an orthidox Jew, and Michael J. Fox walk into a bar...

Posted by: Havedash at October 21, 2013 01:21 PM (F0WNa)

160 Regular solitaire? Spider solitaire? Free cell? Discuss.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:21 PM (dfYL9)

161 But I never before spelled out that "interesting," when it drifts into Troublesome Areas Fraught With Verbal Peril, actually creates a great deal of work for everyone.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:12 PM (/IWYB)

By "troublesome areas fraught with verbal peril" do you mean controversial conversational topics? Because this blog already covers the big 4: politics, religion, computer platforms, and cross vs long bows. Everything else is just peripheral chatter.

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:21 PM (BF+2f)

162 A solution to the vanilla blog week problem:

Ace of Spades HQ announces:

Brony Week

Come discuss your favorite episodes, and talk about your collectibles.

Might go a whole week without a click. Um, you might have to make sure Empire of Jeff doesn't have comment access.

Posted by: Splunge at October 21, 2013 01:22 PM (bKA83)

163 160 Regular solitaire?
Spider solitaire?
Free cell?

Discuss.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 05:21 PM (dfYL9)

I say, Giant Face-Eating Spider solitaire!

Posted by: kathysaysso at October 21, 2013 01:23 PM (6H6o8)

164 Nice day, huh? How about that weather? Not too cold, but not hot, either.

Gonna watch some tv tonight. Maybe 2 Broke Girls. Lotsa laffs. *cough*

Maybe some leftovers for dinner. Nom.

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 01:24 PM (Yy2ZT)

165 Cricket in Slow Motion British Retirement Community Game Rooms Less Well-Known Vegetables, Boiled

Posted by: Merovign , Dark Lord of the Sith [/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at October 21, 2013 01:25 PM (qyfb5)

166 163 160
Regular solitaire?

Spider solitaire?

Free cell?

Discuss.

Tetris, nuff said.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:25 PM (QdOC1)

167 163---I say, Giant Face-Eating Spider solitaire! Posted by: kathysaysso at October 21, 2013 05:23 PM (6H6o

------------------- :shock:

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:25 PM (dfYL9)

168 Anyone ever wonder why Hillary always wears pantsuits? Wonder no more: http://preview.tinyurl.com/m8c9836 Look at those legs! Pianos has slimmer legs!

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b] at October 21, 2013 01:26 PM (sByIH)

169 http://tinyurl.com/ke6d294 And the Tea Party is Gay(no, wait, thas not pink) and in the Czech Republic. Who'da thunk? Now I'm wondering how much that cost and if it's for sale.

Posted by: Keapon Laffin at October 21, 2013 01:26 PM (LRz3v)

170 Here's a topic that oughtta keep everyone busy for a week!

http://bathroomreader.com/2013/10/whatever-happened-singing-nun/

Naaah. Teh Ace would get involved and hang around, thus sacrificing vacay....

Posted by: MrScribbler at October 21, 2013 01:26 PM (kaGpp)

171 >>>But this means that I wind up not having time off, as I'm making judgment calls in the coblogger coordination thread, and writing to guest bloggers, and so on.

That sounds like an interesting thread. How about helping a brother out with a link?

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at October 21, 2013 01:26 PM (IN7k+)

172

"Butter vs. Margerine: the pros and cons"

That one might get violent. Filthy oleofuckers.

Posted by: HeatherRadishÂ™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 05:17 PM (/kI1Q)

Oleo is one step away from its plastic packaging.

Dammit, I'm getting this "let's be boring" shit wrong.

Posted by: steveegg at October 21, 2013 01:27 PM (o44nj)

173 Koala Bear Week

If Discovery can run a full week on sharks...

Besides, I like koala bears.

While I was a plant manager, I noticed and said aloud many times that lack of communications was the root cause of most problems. Try as you might, things/ideas/plans are always left unsaid that should be said. Its also why the peons think that TPTB operates on the Mushroom Management Theory.

Posted by: GnuBreed at October 21, 2013 01:27 PM (wNF3N)

174

Is he gone yet?

FOOD FIGHT!!!

Posted by: connertown at October 21, 2013 01:27 PM (H45zN)

175

:shock: :eyeroll:

Discuss.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:27 PM (dfYL9)

176 Gonna watch some tv tonight. Maybe 2 Broke Girls. Lotsa laffs. *cough*
Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 05:24 PM (Yy2ZT)

The only thing good about 2 Broke Girls is the curvy, black-haired chick with the too-red lipstick. Easy on the eyes, especially if the sound is muted.
Otherwise, I'll pass on it.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:28 PM (QdOC1)

177 Tetris, nuff said.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 05:25 PM (QdOC1)

Original Tetris, the bootleg Atari Tetris, or the bullshit Nintendo Tetris?

Posted by: steveegg at October 21, 2013 01:28 PM (o44nj)

178

:cinnamon roll:

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:28 PM (dfYL9)

179 149 "Butter vs. Margerine: the pros and cons"
That one might get violent. Filthy oleofuckers.
Posted by: HeatherRadishÂ™ needs a beer at October 21, 2013 05:17 PM (/kI1Q)

I actually just found out in the last few months that the whole bad fats, "palm and coconut oils will keeell you if you have one drop!" health campaign in the 80's was based on a study paid for by. . . the canola oil company. EVIL. I use coconut oil all the time now, it is really good for people with ADD, really delicious in baked goods. There is a "better fat sisters" PSA on my local talk radio, sponsored by the canola companies, want them to DIAF every time I hear it.

And apparently olive oil is bad for you when heated? I cannot stand all these stupid health rules, the stress of trying to decipher it all will kill you before the fat does! *flips table*

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:29 PM (BF+2f)

180 Enjoy your week off, Ace. I am a really boring commenter, so I'll try to comment even more this week, and to be more boring than usual. Mediocre people everywhere thank you.

Posted by: Mayday at October 21, 2013 01:30 PM (eHc+1)

181 Original Tetris, the bootleg Atari Tetris, or the bullshit Nintendo Tetris?

Posted by: steveegg at October 21, 2013 05:28 PM (o44nj)

Tetris that runs on my IBM PS/2 Model 30, DOS 3.1, whichever one that is.

Probably the original.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:30 PM (QdOC1)

182 The only thing good about 2 Broke Girls is the curvy, black-haired chick with the too-red lipstick. Easy on the eyes, especially if the sound is muted. Otherwise, I'll pass on it. Yep. She was cute in Thor too. That show is unwatchable. I tried, but "sleep farts". *shudder*

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b] at October 21, 2013 01:30 PM (sByIH)

183 Yep. She was cute in Thor too. That show is unwatchable. I tried, but "sleep farts". *shudder*

Posted by: bonhomme at October 21, 2013 05:30 PM (sByIH)

It's not unwatchable, just unlistenable.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:32 PM (QdOC1)

184 So, we just hold off on all the [CENSORED] until you get back next week, and then submit it all in a torrent of [CENSORED]Â… including the Jell-o?

Posted by: The Political Hat at October 21, 2013 01:32 PM (XvHmy)

185 It's not unwatchable, just unlistenable. I stand corrected.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b] at October 21, 2013 01:33 PM (sByIH)

186 This post strikes me as kind of edgy and provocative!

Posted by: steve walsh at October 21, 2013 01:34 PM (kaaqI)

187 Me @ 179

Oh sorry, whoops, I'm doing it wrong! *flips table back over gently, sits back down, twiddles thumbs, puts on show on public television where I watch grass grow*

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:34 PM (BF+2f)

188 >>>It's not unwatchable, just unlistenable. her boobs are wonderful and I cannot bring myself to watch that show. It is literally worse than the Holocaust.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:35 PM (/IWYB)

189 Old and Busted: Flaming Skull
New Hotness: http://tinyurl.com/msbz795 ?

Posted by: The Steward of Gondor at October 21, 2013 01:35 PM (2ESh+)

190 puts on show on public television where I watch grass grow* It's called golf, Philistine.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b] at October 21, 2013 01:35 PM (sByIH)

191 was that too edgy? Okay, it's *as bad* as the Holocaust.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:35 PM (/IWYB)

192 Worse than Whitney?

Posted by: dantesed at October 21, 2013 01:36 PM (lnIUR)

193 This is precedent setting. I don't ever recall a major political blog pleading to not be interesting. You clearly need professionals for this and I cannot think of anyone better suited than Joe Scarborough. Maybe Mika. Brooks and Shields could serve as backup. Why not invite them to guest blog for a week? Then we all can have a nice long nap.

Posted by: Levin at October 21, 2013 01:36 PM (cQ4Va)

194 pretty edgy stuff Ace... you just can't help it...

Posted by: Yip at October 21, 2013 01:36 PM (/jHWN)

195

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:35 PM (/IWYB)

So play in the comments with us a while. A year of doing nothing but that has done wonders for me.

Posted by: steveegg at October 21, 2013 01:37 PM (o44nj)

196 >>> Worse than Whitney? possibly. I don't know. I actually tried to watch 2 Broke Girls just for her boobs. I did not expect any actual entertainment. I had to turn it off because it was aggressively horrible.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:38 PM (/IWYB)

197 189 >>>It's not unwatchable, just unlistenable.

her boobs are wonderful and I cannot bring myself to watch that show. It is literally worse than the Holocaust.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:35 PM (/IWYB)

I was going to say that it was figuratively worse than the Holocaust, but, after careful consideration, I agree. It is literally worse.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:38 PM (QdOC1)

198 >>>This is precedent setting. I don't ever recall a major political blog pleading to not be interesting. >>>You clearly need professionals for this and I cannot think of anyone better suited than Joe Scarborough. Maybe Mika. Brooks and Shields could serve as backup. oh so funny. You're so witty. God forbid I should actually get time off instead of playing web-nanny all week. But you keep whining about how your needs aren't being sufficiently met by the blog. Say, have you heard of a site called Hot Air, by any chance...?

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:39 PM (/IWYB)

199 On the one hand knitting hats keeps your head warm. On the other, knitting mittens keeps your hands warm. I can see the value in either, or even both! If pressed to make a choice of only one, I would have a slight preference for the hat. My position is based on the assumption that my coat has pockets for my hands. If that assumption is wrong, everything goes out the window! I could be swayed by persuasive arguments, so let's hear them. Please discuss.

Posted by: Dave S. at October 21, 2013 01:40 PM (BfZ1r)

200 her boobs are wonderful and I cannot bring myself to watch that show. It is literally worse than the Holocaust. True fact: Kat Dennings is Jewish.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b] at October 21, 2013 01:40 PM (sByIH)

201 >>>I was going to say that it was figuratively worse than the Holocaust, but, after careful consideration, I agree. It is literally worse. i think it might be.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:40 PM (/IWYB)

202 dave s, now that's the kind of content i'm looking for!

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:41 PM (/IWYB)

203 It would be an interesting experiment worthy of study. A popular blog, takes a week off. All of the regular commenters and lurkers unable to comment... just a placeholder page saying site will return in 5, 4, 3 ..etc days... clicking down.

How many who visit regularly would not be right back? How many new visitors matter anyway if you lose them.. heh. You'd get more buzz after the week off.

Hmmm... have a chance to watch some movies for reviews... political landscape would rise and fall without snark or give-and-take, but we'd get right back to it. Of course, you'd have to give the premium members a break on the subscription, but it would be doable..

Posted by: Yip at October 21, 2013 01:41 PM (/jHWN)

204 Her name is Kat Dennings....

http://tinyurl.com/l3fg2cv

SFW

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 21, 2013 01:42 PM (oJ5Fd)

205 I have a suggestion - a great post might be one about say, fishing. Fishing is nice and has lots of content to share. People can talk a lot about fish and everyone reading it will just assume that it's all in good fun and everyone else is a liar except for themselves. It is a win/win situation. Content plus easy plus fun.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at October 21, 2013 01:42 PM (VFtsA)

206

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 05:38 PM (QdOC1)

Crap you guys, tone down the LOLs, if I start snorting out loud at work they'll be on to me! And explaining how a Holocaust joke is funny in cubie-land is unpossible. (But srsly, thanks for the LOL.)

Posted by: LizLem at October 21, 2013 01:43 PM (BF+2f)

207 Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 21, 2013 05:42 PM (oJ5Fd)

I suddenly have a craving for a large, tall, warm glass of milk.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:43 PM (QdOC1)

208 >>>Her name is Kat Dennings.... oh I know. I didn't tune into the show for the laughs. Actually I didn't tune in at all. The DVR wasn't synced right and it recorded her awful show instead of the Big Bang Theory. So I thought, "Oh, I'll just look at her boobs." Turned it off after five minutes. It is literally worse than Slavery.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:44 PM (/IWYB)

209 It is literally worse than Slavery.
Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:44 PM (/IWYB)

THAT ^^^ is proper 'toning down'.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:45 PM (QdOC1)

210 It is literally worse than Slavery.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:44 PM (/IWYB)

Well, thanks for taking the hit for the rest of us.

Although...those boobs are delightful.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 21, 2013 01:45 PM (oJ5Fd)

211

Posted by: Ex PFC at October 21, 2013 01:46 PM (XUKZU)

212 It is literally worse than Slavery. Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:44 PM (/IWYB) ------ Hey, that's what I say about the GOP!

Posted by: Debbie Wassermann Schultz at October 21, 2013 01:46 PM (BfZ1r)

213 Too prolix.

Posted by: Ex PFC Wintergreen at October 21, 2013 01:46 PM (XUKZU)

214 Sweetwater River in Wyoming is the fourth best fly fishing I have every experienced. First through third are 2 streams in North Western Montana (near Hungry Horse) and one branch of the Flathead that I've fished.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at October 21, 2013 01:47 PM (VFtsA)

215 "The only thing good about 2 Broke Girls is the curvy, black-haired chick with the too-red lipstick. Easy on the eyes, especially if the sound is muted.
Otherwise, I'll pass on it."
==============

*simmering*

Listen you stoopid, steaming DONKEY-SCRATCHING GOATFUKCER!!!1!!!!

THE BLONDE IS HOTTER! GOT IT? TEH BLONDE WITH THE MILE LONG LEGS IS

No, no. Sorry. Sorry! So sorry! We're not doing that this week. Sorry! I lost myself for a moment there.

You're opinion is perfectly understandable, and I respect its validity.

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 01:47 PM (Yy2ZT)

216 Tetris, nuff said. Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 05:25 PM (QdOC1) Defender. Arcade model.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 01:48 PM (IXrOn)

217 I got confused. For a moment I thought this signaled the release of the Hillary! Policy Papers for a Better America!! I stand corrected.

Posted by: The Poster Formerly Known as Mr. Barky at October 21, 2013 01:48 PM (OPzNA)

218 Actually, "2 Broke Girls" is largely unwatchable, and I finally stopped watching it earlier this year.

The only thing it had going for it was the unexpectedly sweet chemistry between the two girls, but it's not enough.

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 01:49 PM (Yy2ZT)

219 Cup of tea, anyone? Chamomile!

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 01:49 PM (Yy2ZT)

220 Can we do butter pecan? Posted by: rickb223 at October 21, 2013 04:55 PM (KvM9d) Yes, please!

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Waiting for the Sun at October 21, 2013 01:50 PM (LC91+)

221 "...sweet chemistry between the two girls..."

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 05:49 PM (Yy2ZT)

Obviously that doesn't mean what I hope it means.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 21, 2013 01:50 PM (oJ5Fd)

222 Defender.
Arcade model.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at October 21, 2013 05:48 PM (IXrOn)

It's not the same game. It's a different game, it has new content

Posted by: Reggie Fils-Aime at October 21, 2013 01:50 PM (vJdyz)

223 vanilla bean pods. worth the exorbitant price or just use artificial vanilla? I suspect pretentious cookery snobbishness, but I don't know by actual in kitchen experience.

Posted by: I can do toast at October 21, 2013 01:51 PM (+qUfr)

224 inspector,

fishing is a good topic but it's more of a weekend thing. Would you submit a weekend fishing post for sat or sun?

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:51 PM (/IWYB)

225 Obviously that doesn't mean what I hope it means.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 21, 2013 05:50 PM (oJ5Fd)

I'd pay good money to watch Dennings and Behrs tribbing

Posted by: The Perv at October 21, 2013 01:52 PM (vJdyz)

226 Turns out the Boss is a control freak, who will not delegate, or let go. Also wants to live the Obama lifestyle.

Posted by: nip at October 21, 2013 01:52 PM (jI23+)

227 You're opinion is perfectly understandable, and I respect its validity.

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 05:47 PM (Yy2ZT)

Since I only catch that hideous show in passing as I channel surf, occasionally I will pop it on my TV split screen, muted.

The skinny blonde is not in my wheelhouse, but I think she is starting to grow on me.

Posted by: Ian Galt at October 21, 2013 01:52 PM (QdOC1)

228 I'm assuming that these troublesome posts are in draft? I would think the published posts today are right down the middle, readable/interesting but not provocative enough for major comment battles. The CBD bourbon thread yesterday was excellent BTW.

Posted by: Motionview at October 21, 2013 01:52 PM (2yPl+)

229 Dunno if it was mentioned above, but if ace wants to start out a quiet week, today's MNF game ought to start it right.

I mean really...A team with a 0-6 record vs a team with a 1-5 record?

Things don't get slower than that. Well, unless you are trying to fix the government healthcare web-site.

Posted by: HH at October 21, 2013 01:52 PM (XXwdv)

230 vanilla bean pods. worth the exorbitant price or just use artificial vanilla? I suspect pretentious cookery snobbishness, but I don't know by actual in kitchen experience.

Posted by: I can do toast at October 21, 2013 05:51 PM (+qUfr)

pods give a richer flavor IMO, worth the cash (though the price has gone way up over the last year)

Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 01:53 PM (vJdyz)

231 Two Broke Girls...doesn't that sound like Alice? How can they improve on "Kiss my Grits"?

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at October 21, 2013 01:53 PM (Ec6wH)

232 >>>229 I'm assuming that these troublesome posts are in draft? yes. and btw it's not that they're sooo bad I'm scandalized. they're just on topics that will spur some troublesome comments and thus will require nannying.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:54 PM (/IWYB)

233 Ace, sure. I write stupid and slow so it'll take me a bit. I'd be happy to try. I'll send it via the electonical mail thingy when I'm done.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at October 21, 2013 01:54 PM (VFtsA)

234 You know, I watched Judge Jeanine Piro on Fox News for the first time this past Saturday Night.

I'd never really paid any attention to her before, and she was going off on how much Obama and ObamaCare suck, and she seemed a little crazy, but she also seemed really really HOT.

And the longer she went on raving, the hotter she seemed. And she was wearing this tiny little red dress with high heels, and her legs were all oiled up, and I'm telling you -- she is freaking sexy as all hell.

And then I find out she's 63 years old!

Got to tell you: this is a new horizon for me, lusting after pre-seniors.

Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 01:54 PM (Yy2ZT)

235 200 On the one hand knitting hats keeps your head warm. On the other, knitting mittens keeps your hands warm. I can see the value in either, or even both! If pressed to make a choice of only one, I would have a slight preference for the hat. My position is based on the assumption that my coat has pockets for my hands. If that assumption is wrong, everything goes out the window! I could be swayed by persuasive arguments, so let's hear them. Please discuss. Posted by: Dave S. at October 21, 2013 05:40 PM (BfZ1r) ---------------------- Why not just put your head in a pocket? That would leave you a free pocket for your keys, phone, and wallet, etc. , whereas your hands would take over both.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at October 21, 2013 01:54 PM (dfYL9)

236 fix the government healthcare web-site. Fix? A government healthcare web site?!?! *barely suppressed giggle* How much ya' got?

Posted by: Top. Men. at October 21, 2013 01:55 PM (LC91+)

237 So who's going to be the hawt chick in Ace's "Blurred Lines" music video?

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2013 01:55 PM (PLOz8)

238 I was once involved in a trial about how paint dries. A painting contractor had a contract with a major developer to paint all of their house. The paint peeled off. Developer fired contractor. The contractor sued the paint provider for inferior paint. The issue was whether it was improperly applied or defective. About two weeks of battle of the experts on the subject of paint drying. Multimillion dollar verdict, though.

Posted by: Ex PFC Wintergreen at October 21, 2013 01:55 PM (XUKZU)

239 inspector, thanks. you can also wait until next weekend (after this weekend) if you like. no rush.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 01:56 PM (/IWYB)

240 206 I have a suggestion - a great post might be one about say, fishing. Fishing is nice and has lots of content to share. People can talk a lot about fish and everyone reading it will just assume that it's all in good fun and everyone else is a liar except for themselves.

It is a win/win situation. Content plus easy plus fun.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at October 21, 2013 05:42 PM (VFtsA)

H8r!!!!

Posted by: Fish Liberation Front at October 21, 2013 01:56 PM (T1005)

241 "yes. and btw it's not that they're sooo bad I'm scandalized. they're just on topics that will spur some troublesome comments and thus will require nannying."
==========

Freddy needs a nanny!

Posted by: Freddy at October 21, 2013 01:56 PM (Yy2ZT)

242 Got to tell you: this is a new horizon for me, lusting after pre-seniors. Posted by: Kensington at October 21, 2013 05:54 PM (Yy2ZT) It happens.

Posted by: Clint Eastwood at October 21, 2013 01:57 PM (LC91+)

243 I gotta say, the new Katy Perry song is catchy. I can almost forgive her for endorsing a radical Marxist-Leninist Chicago ward heeler who will lead the nation into utter doom. But it is a fun listen.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at October 21, 2013 01:57 PM (Ec6wH)

244 233 >>>229 I'm assuming that these troublesome posts are in draft? yes. and btw it's not that they're sooo bad I'm scandalized. they're just on topics that will spur some troublesome comments and thus will require nannying. Dude! You're suppose to be on vaca not babysitting us! Have a great time off, relax, enjoy! Nothing to worry about! That is until The Cat in the Hat arrives with Thing 1 and Thing 2, but don't you worry your pretty little head. The Fish is going to maintain order just like he did in the book...

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2013 01:58 PM (PLOz8)

245 Beth Behrs does a surprisingly good job with what was probably a broad mockery of Paris Hilton. She's outshining the more well known Ms. Dennings. for values of outshine. not even Chico Escuela and Stifler's Mom can salvage the show.

Posted by: help I am stuck in the couch at October 21, 2013 01:58 PM (+qUfr)

246 Laughing at all the bland things we could talk about.
But, you know, we could find a way to fight over all of them.

Posted by: Gidget at October 21, 2013 01:58 PM (tfg7i)

247 Well shoot. We just had drunken slumber party at Gushie's house, but I don't think there was any vanilla in the whipped cream. Guess we shouldn't post any of the pics Grimmy took.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 21, 2013 01:58 PM (0W1JK)

248 wish the gang of gaming morons wasn't a gang of 1, I can't blame anything on anyone else

Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 01:59 PM (vJdyz)

249 I can almost forgive her for endorsing a radical Marxist-Leninist Chicago ward heeler who will lead the nation into utter doom. Nah. Not even for a motor boat session....

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Waiting for the Sun at October 21, 2013 01:59 PM (LC91+)

250 248 Well shoot. We just had drunken slumber party at Gushie's house, but I don't think there was any vanilla in the whipped cream. Guess we shouldn't post any of the pics Grimmy took.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 21, 2013 05:58 PM (0W1JK)

Hmmm....that explains why Gushka never replied to my email.

Posted by: cthulhu at October 21, 2013 02:00 PM (T1005)

251
Or y'all could ponder for a week the visual of Rosie O'Donnell in spandex.

Posted by: irongrampa at October 21, 2013 02:00 PM (SAMxH)

252 231 vanilla bean pods. worth the exorbitant price or just use artificial vanilla? I suspect pretentious cookery snobbishness, but I don't know by actual in kitchen experience. Never, ever, ever, under any circumstance, use artificial vanilla flavoring. Always go for the real deal. If you can't find or afford the beans, use real vanilla extract.

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2013 02:00 PM (PLOz8)

253 239 I was once involved in a trial about how paint dries. A painting contractor had a contract with a major developer to paint all of their house. The paint peeled off. Developer fired contractor. The contractor sued the paint provider for inferior paint. The issue was whether it was improperly applied or defective. About two weeks of battle of the experts on the subject of paint drying. Multimillion dollar verdict, though. Posted by: Ex PFC Wintergreen at October 21, 2013 05:55 PM (XUKZU) Heh...it's called prep work. The tedious shit that sucks shit through a straw and new guys are used to do it. ....or Home Depot Day Laborers..

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Waiting for the Sun at October 21, 2013 02:03 PM (LC91+)

254 1) Doesn't Ace have the guest bloggers' e-mail addresses? Can't he just e-mail them rather than continually air the site's dirty laundry on the front page?
2) Why does Ace even blog anymore? It's obvious he doesn't like it. What was a fun lark ten years ago has become an onerous chore. So quit and either shutter the site or turn it over to the co-bloggers.
3) Looking at today's posts, what was so terribly provocative that Ace had to interrupt his vacation?

Posted by: FART at October 21, 2013 02:03 PM (i14bS)

255 Speaking of trials, I have a sex assault by force case between two sixteen year olds. Just before preliminary hearing, defense counsel gave me what was purported to be a note from my victim to the defendant inviting him for a romantic adventure. I continued the PH to investigate. She denied writing the note suggesting it must be a forgery. I'm no expert but it sure likes like her handwriting to me. My victim advocate and I came up with a scheme. She called up the victim that we would just send the note off to get the DNA off it and if her DNA was on it we would know. Our thought was that then she would respond that the note was in fact written by her or say that there is no way the note could have her DNA on it. Instead she said that he never had paper in class so she routinely loaned her paper to him so her DNA would be on it.. This is answer I expect from a defendant, not a victim.

Posted by: WalrusRex at October 21, 2013 02:03 PM (XUKZU)

256 Posted by: The Dude at October 21, 2013 05:59 PM (vJdyz)

I dunno. That gang of 1 seems to do a pretty damn fine job.

Ummm, not that I read it of course...

Posted by: HH at October 21, 2013 02:04 PM (XXwdv)

257 252 Or y'all could ponder for a week the visual of Rosie O'Donnell in spandex. Posted by: irongrampa at October 21, 2013 06:00 PM (SAMxH) Great. Now I will never get a stiffy again.....

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Waiting for the Sun at October 21, 2013 02:05 PM (LC91+)

258 Say, have you heard of a site called Hot Air, by any chance...?

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2013 05:39 PM (/IWYB)

This never gets old.

The fact that it amuses me the fiftieth time is an indication of the depths of my immaturity however.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at October 21, 2013 02:07 PM (oJ5Fd)

259 "When the Boss is off, it's not the time for Exciting New Product Rollouts or Aggressive Entries Into New Markets."

Dear Admiral Dewey,

Please seize Manila.

Yours truly,

T. Roosevelt
Asst Secretary of the Navy

P.S. Secretary Long will be back in on Monday.

Posted by: Mr. Happy at October 21, 2013 02:09 PM (N57hb)

260 You're opinion is perfectly understandable, and I respect its validity.

*chokes on popcorn*

Sweet Bast, that's funny.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ #NukeIowaCity at October 21, 2013 02:11 PM (/kI1Q)

261

Ace...I'm sorry you haven't been able to take time off yet.

It's like having a tiger by the tail.

Most small business owners are aware of this aspect of owning your own business.

It sucks, I know.

As far as posting Boring Content...

I would suggest posting videos of those 'How It's Made' shows.

Posted by: wheatie at October 21, 2013 02:22 PM (RaSFf)

262
Ace, I enjoy your writing, but Dude, PLEASE work on being more CONCISE.

Posted by: Sphynx at October 21, 2013 02:23 PM (OZmbA)

263 Looks like we'll need gas masks distributed for those reading comment number 255, and not just because of the stinky sock's name either.

Posted by: steveegg at October 21, 2013 02:27 PM (o44nj)

264 How about a compromise - boring shit not requiring tending during the day, then once the cobs had a decent dinner, release the kraken for an hour or so.

Posted by: steveegg at October 21, 2013 02:30 PM (o44nj)

265 Enjoy your time off. Things will be fine.

Posted by: Titanium at October 21, 2013 02:44 PM (IgOQg)

266 "...just like our President has 40 weeks a year. Maybe even some golf." So you're implying tfg actually does some work the other 12 weeks a year? Surley, you jest.

Posted by: Ted Striker at October 21, 2013 02:50 PM (EJ/Tn)

267 And post a fake phone number for us to call for any questions or concerns. 1-800-crsbows

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent at October 21, 2013 02:55 PM (PMGbu)

268 >>"I'm shooting for a genuine week off, more or less."-- Ace

I thought you were already on vacation. You're not getting off to a very good start.

Posted by: Commissioner Gordon at October 21, 2013 03:21 PM (NFg1K)

269 Ace wants up to behave ourselves while we are away? *SNORT* Yeah, surrrre we will.

Posted by: WannabeAnglican at October 21, 2013 03:23 PM (S9Q43)

270 Ace ..... it sounds like you need to seriously start drinking and then go out on an overnight hobo hunt ... night vision goggles and all.

Posted by: bverwey at October 21, 2013 04:18 PM (zVt1j)

271 I knitted lots for a few years. Then I hurt my arm in a tragic shooting incident. I strained a tendon or something pulling back the slide on a new Ruger SR-9. Couldn't knit for months. Then realized I didn't really enjoy knitting after all. Shooting is more fun. Off to the range with my revolver.

Posted by: Qzsusy at October 21, 2013 04:26 PM (J0VjC)

272 So why not just shut down for a week and see if we come back. Basically you are saying it won't be worth reading anyway

Posted by: Dave at October 21, 2013 04:44 PM (aERqO)

273 Posting to your own idiot infidel blog while on vacation is forbidden under the sharia. Vacation is for vacation.

Rest, Ewok. Await your trial before Islamic court with clear head.

Posted by: Boko Haram at October 21, 2013 04:48 PM (uetv9)

274 GOOD! Let your stupid blog full of stupid people be boring! Maybe then you won't be such a one-stop shop for racist hatred against our beloved multicultural President who you RethugliKKKans refuse to accept in your lives!

Then maybe it will all go away and your can live your pathetic lives elsewhere!

Posted by: Mary Cloggenstein from Brattleboro, Vermont at October 21, 2013 04:50 PM (uetv9)

275 Boring, um, k.

Posted by: Socalcon at October 21, 2013 05:09 PM (K6CHr)

276 Where is Michael Savage tonight? Any other commentators missing? Are they having a super sekret meeting?

Posted by: just a citizen at October 21, 2013 05:10 PM (Nx76m)

277 Ace have a good vacation. We'll be fine, for varying values of fine. And I will continue my usual boring posts. So no worries.

Posted by: NaCly Dog at October 21, 2013 05:23 PM (u82oZ)

278

Just remember ... Drive for Show - Putt for Dough.

And so I see ACE is a golfer ... interesting.

Posted by: ScoggDog ... still not GOP at October 21, 2013 05:30 PM (6/+vz)

279 So ace..... need any help with your balls?

Posted by: B. Soetero, Caddie at October 21, 2013 05:58 PM (jucos)

280 Dude...you seriously need to learn to be able to let go of the blog at times. You're going to give yourself a heart attack with this kind of dependency.

Posted by: YourPoopyPants at October 21, 2013 06:07 PM (bOKSd)

281

We could discuss the ins and outs of the missionary position?

Jim

Sunk New Dawn

Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at October 21, 2013 06:14 PM (vvk2F)

282 I still can't decide if Cloggenstein is a really, really dedicated spoof or an actual lib idiot. It seems a little too eager with anti-conservative buzzwords to be genuine.

Posted by: Conservative Crank at October 21, 2013 06:19 PM (sQ0LB)

283 I genuinely hate conservative cranks, Mr. Crank! You and that terrible Mr. O'Spades person can BOTH take a long vacation with Megyn Kelly's garbage!

Posted by: Mary Cloggenstein from Brattleboro, Vermont at October 21, 2013 08:48 PM (ACq/K)

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