February 13, 2014

Feelgood Story Of The Day II: House Republicans Say Cruz Killed Immigration Reform
— andy

Ted Cruz. Is there anything he can't do?

"House Republicans who supported 'principles' of immigration reform floated by Speaker John Boehner late last month grumbled Tuesday that the plan was dead on arrival because Cruz blasted it as 'amnesty,' spurring a blizzard of negative phone calls to House Republicans."

Yeah. People were totally jamming the phone lines because Ted Cruz called it "amnesty". If that one blasted fellow hadn't said anything, people would've been a-ok with it.

These unnamed, grumbly House Republicans sound a lot like Al Gore's AGW co-religionists who blame Climate Change!™ for everything.

Meanwhile, out here in the hinterlands we don't need Ted Cruz to tell us that the House desperately wants to sell us out on amnesty. We have Drew M. for that.

Posted by: andy at 08:12 AM | Comments (475)
Post contains 153 words, total size 1 kb.

1 It's easier to blame one person than the thousands of people melting your phone lines.

Posted by: Dang at February 13, 2014 08:14 AM (MNq6o)

2 Ted Cruz is making Chuck Norris look like a putz.

-ZR

Posted by: Zionist Redneck at February 13, 2014 08:14 AM (/4rBF)

3 Burn him!!!

Posted by: RINO Betters at February 13, 2014 08:14 AM (Aif/5)

4 Snow. That is all

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 08:14 AM (aDwsi)

5 I think Ted Cruz must be Jewish.

Why else would he be blamed for everything?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 13, 2014 08:15 AM (QFxY5)

6 Why don't we just call everyone South of the Border a  US Citizen, send them a check every month, and just get it over with? This isn't the Hill to die on.

Posted by: Republican "Leaders" at February 13, 2014 08:15 AM (ndlFj)

7 Wooohooo Ted!

First he gets immigration "reform" dropped, then he makes Bitch McConnell take one for the establishment team! lol..

Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at February 13, 2014 08:16 AM (Z7PrM)

8 Ted "Global Warming" Cruz Cuz there's nothing he can't do.

Posted by: rockhead at February 13, 2014 08:16 AM (jtTKf)

9 But it's just like I told you last week, Boehner is listening to you so you should be happy with him.

Posted by: RINO Betters at February 13, 2014 08:16 AM (Aif/5)

10

Ann Coulter has a good piece on amnesty.

Posted by: Draki at February 13, 2014 08:17 AM (L8r/r)

11 Be aware that the link takes you to hard Left site.

Posted by: John W. at February 13, 2014 08:17 AM (PVBzL)

12 Perception, Andy, perception.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:18 AM (A98Xu)

13 And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for that meddling Cruz!

Posted by: Old Man Jenkins/Boehner at February 13, 2014 08:18 AM (FJYfm)

14 Your move, senator Cruz.

Posted by: Mr. Powerstroke Super Duty 4X4 King Ranch Edition at February 13, 2014 08:18 AM (IGDdf)

15 Is the Democrats' push for amnesty a sign that it'll be the only thing that'll save them in future elections?

Posted by: Draki at February 13, 2014 08:19 AM (L8r/r)

16 2 Ted Cruz is making Chuck Norris look like a putz.

-ZR

Posted by: Zionist Redneck at February 13, 2014 12:14 PM (/4rBF)

Ted Cruz once kicked a horse in the chin.  Its descendants are now known as giraffes.

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 08:19 AM (x3YFz)

17 Unlike Climate Change ™, Ted Cruz is very real.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:19 AM (olDqf)

18 All of Stephen King's novels are thinly disguised biographies of Ted Cruz.

Posted by: irright at February 13, 2014 08:19 AM (8GKDa)

19 Dirty hippie is recycling threads.

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:20 AM (6bMeY)

20 Be aware that the link takes you to hard Left site. Yes, do not read the comments. Unless you absolutely want to see blood shoot out of your eyes. Our country is finished.

Posted by: Schwalbe: The Me-262© at February 13, 2014 08:20 AM (9Bdcz)

21 If the R's could have passed amnesty quietly they would have. There were a few who were willing to shout from the roof tops that it was coming. Good for them. So yes, we did need Cruz in the hinterlands to shout it out, loudly.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:20 AM (A98Xu)

22 16 Ted Cruz once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are now known as giraffes. Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 12:19 PM (x3YFz) Ted Cruz = Mongo GOP = the horse

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:20 AM (olDqf)

23 Man, if he accomplished this, I'm all in.

Posted by: Y-not (@MoxieMom) at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (zDsvJ)

24 When Ted Cruz butt-fucks Immigration Reform, he wears Night of the Cougar Man (tm) brand condoms.

Posted by: Sharkman at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (TM1p8)

25 Okay, senator or not Cruz can be the next President. Of the new Republic of Texas.

Posted by: Mr. Dave at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (q3qkr)

26 Ted Cruz never wet the bed as a child.  The bed wet itself out of fear.

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (x3YFz)

27 10 Ann Coulter hasa good piece on amnesty. Posted by: Draki at February 13, 2014 12:17 PM (L8r/r) She's gone back to defending Krispy Kreosote.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (olDqf)

28 Heh, old Ted is just pissing in everybodys cheerios ain't he. I fucking love that guy.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (xWW96)

29 Cruz is Peruvian.

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (6bMeY)

30 I've been loving their comments.

Posted by: Draki at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (L8r/r)

31 I think we know what's embossed on senator Cruz's wallet.

Posted by: Countrysquire at February 13, 2014 08:21 AM (IGDdf)

32 Jenny? Things got a little out of hand. It's just this war and that lying son of a bitch Cruz and...

Posted by: hippie boyfriend [/i] [/b] at February 13, 2014 08:22 AM (cxs6V)

33 It's nice to hear Republicans think Ted Cruz is like right wing hate radio and needs to be silenced. Because that's what theyre saying. Republicans are angry that People are informed.

Posted by: Soothsayer says, at February 13, 2014 08:22 AM (mQ2Jz)

34 3, 2, 1,Â…...

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:22 AM (A98Xu)

35

I'm still getting those "conservative Republicans in Congress want to fix this immigration  problem, but don't you dare call it amnesty" ads during Rush's show.

 

Let's get Cruz on it, I'm tired of hearing them.

 

And while  he's at it, maybe he can stop the Vermont Teddy Bear/order your flowers NOOOOOWWWWW  ads too. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:22 AM (TOk1P)

36 I grow tired of all this Ted Cruz worship. The GOP has everything aligned for a stellar 2014 - if only that guy would shut up.

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 13, 2014 08:22 AM (VXk4i)

37 1 It's easier to blame one person than the thousands of people melting your phone lines. Posted by: Dang at February 13, 2014 12:14 PM (MNq6o) Well in that case may the Leviathan suffer the death of a thousand Ted Cruz's.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:22 AM (olDqf)

38 Sounds like Cruz is being thrown under the bus, to weaken his popularity.

If only the GOP had another target to focus their political ambitions.

Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 08:23 AM (Kkt/i)

39 Ted Cruz can divide by zero.

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 08:23 AM (x3YFz)

40 It is amnesty and the RNC leadership was more than willing to sell us out.  They are all a pile of dirty rotten RINOs.  And that is not meant as a joke.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at February 13, 2014 08:23 AM (T2V/1)

41 See, Republicans, like Democrats, think you're stupid. That's why they thought Zfuckerberg's insulting ads would actually work.

Posted by: Soothsayer says, at February 13, 2014 08:23 AM (mQ2Jz)

42 Our best fighters appear to be Gowdy and Cruz. A dynamic duo. These two guys can change the country if elected to the right offices.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:24 AM (xWW96)

43 "House Republicans who supported 'principles' of immigration reform floated by Speaker John Boehner late last month grumbled Tuesday that the plan was dead on arrival because Cruz blasted it as 'amnesty,' spurring a blizzard of negative phone calls to House Republicans."

Driveway and pipestem cleared of snow, cars cleaned off.  Now, at last, I have time to consider the important events of the day. 

What's this amnesty thing?  It does what?  Why wasn't I told? 

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 08:24 AM (6TB1Z)

44 Now we need Ted Cruz Sr. To,go do some big rallies in KN and SC.

Posted by: Jean at February 13, 2014 08:24 AM (4JkHl)

45

I think Ted Cruz  may have killed Meredith Kercher.  

 

To please Amanda Knox. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:24 AM (TOk1P)

46 Because he stood up, Cruz is getting some recognition for it (deserved or not). Perception baby, perception.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:24 AM (A98Xu)

47 Can we give him a gold medal?

Posted by: BignJames at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (ZNQKl)

48

Good.  Glad to see one area where the Democrats could actually be smacked resulting in a smack.  Not only that, the anti-amnesty position is actually the popular position in America, so another win.

 

 

Now to get the leadership to understand that just because you can't win on all fronts doesn't mean you don't fight on the fronts you can win on.  I mean - what else is more obvious than that?

Posted by: Mikey NTH - President's Day Sale - All Red Hot Rage 15% Off! at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (hLRSq)

49 Turned on NBC, there's a waifish ... dude? ... figure skating to AC/DC's Back in Black. He's fallen twice as I've typed this, but I think he gets bonus camp points. Not sure how the scoring works. Ohhh ... it just changed to Thunderstruck. It's a medley.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (ZPrif)

50 38 Sounds like Cruz is being thrown under the bus, to weaken his popularity. If only the GOP had another target to focus their political ambitions. Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 12:23 PM (Kkt/i) That will bite them in the ass, and hard. I think people on our side are really waking up to the fucking games the GOP is playing. McConnell's and perhaps Cornyn's primary challenges are evidence of that as well as Rove's money raising efforts drying up. Good.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (olDqf)

51 That's why Boehner comes out after jobs report and says, "Where are the jobs, Mr. President?" Because he thinks you're stupid.

Posted by: Soothsayer says, at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (mQ2Jz)

52 "Ted Cruz can divide by zero." Now that's funny!

Posted by: Draki at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (L8r/r)

53 Does he like Green Eggs and Ham?

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:25 AM (6bMeY)

54 Ted Cruz is very real.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 12:19 PM (olDqf)


He's real . . . and spectacular!!

Posted by: Sidra at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (Kkt/i)

55 42 Our best fighters appear to be Gowdy and Cruz. A dynamic duo. These two guys can change the country if elected to the right offices. Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 12:24 PM (xWW96) Mike Lee and Louie Gohmert as well.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (olDqf)

56 So is it: Ted Cruz = Emanuel Goldstein, or Ted Cruz = Karl Rove (the mythical Karl who was always credited with any mischief that occurred during Bush's presidency).

Posted by: Lizzy at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (POpqt)

57 Our best fighters appear to be Gowdy and Cruz. A dynamic duo. These two guys can change the country if elected to the right offices.

Except not long ago, Gowdy sounded pretty squishy on amnesty.  Or maybe that's what you meant. 

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (6TB1Z)

58 Why are you people so dense ? If we just give Obama everything he wants, the GOP will landslide his ass in 2014.

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (VXk4i)

59 RELEASE THE CRUZ MISSILE!

Posted by: model_1066 at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (LIQGY)

60 Is the Democrats' push for amnesty a sign that it'll be the only thing that'll save them in future elections?

Posted by: Draki at February 13, 2014 12:19 PM (L8r/r)

 

 

I'd say yes.  And I'd also guess that with the complete Charlie Foxtrot of ObamaCare they are desperate for some big win somewhere.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - President's Day Sale - All Red Hot Rage 15% Off! at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (hLRSq)

61 Cantor must go.

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (6bMeY)

62 53 Does he like Green Eggs and Ham? Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 12:25 PM (6bMeY) Only if he can shove them in Peter King's pasty face...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (olDqf)

63 I hated this when Bush supported it and still hate it now.

Posted by: joe dagostino at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (5vRRq)

64

Oh, and that Noah movie that's about to come out?

 

You know, with the flood and the big boat?

 

Spoiler alert:   Ted Cruz caused the flood. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:26 AM (TOk1P)

65 >>6 Why don't we just call everyone South of the Border a US Citizen, send them a check every month, and just get it over with? This isn't the Hill to die on. Posted by: Republican "Leaders" at February 13, 2014 12:15 PM (ndlFj) You know, I've been accused of being a purist without any sense of compromise. But you may have something there; it wouldn't be the first time we put Mexicans territory under military governors and gave them citizenship without representation in Congress.

Posted by: Chris Balsz at February 13, 2014 08:27 AM (5xmd7)

66 Ted Cruz can touch MC Hammer.

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 08:27 AM (x3YFz)

67 Yeah, Gohmert is a conservative warrior too. He is great.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:27 AM (xWW96)

68 51 That's why Boehner comes out after jobs report and says, "Where are the jobs, Mr. President?" LULZ...we should give him a medal for his spine of steel.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:27 AM (A98Xu)

69 Titanic sinking? Totally Ted Cruz's fault.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (jNNPU)

70 Alinsky? Personalize it.... Freeze it... Its not that the US Worker wonders why the Government wants to let people into the country at a time when their are few jobs to go around... Its Cruz... because him we can attack...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (84gbM)

71 Bumper Sticker:  "Ted Cruz for President, more powerful than a Global-warmed, bacon-wrapped, Karl Rove."

Posted by: OCBill at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (rFipM)

72 66 Ted Cruz can touch MC Hammer. Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 12:27 PM (x3YFz) What about MC Escher?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (olDqf)

73 I don't know when the "hill to die on" meme for the GOP started but I'm glad at least one GOP dude is finding a hill to fight on. Thanks Ted.

Posted by: ExSnipe at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (LKJt3)

74 Ted Cruz has the world's largest collection of "DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW" mattress tags.

Posted by: jwpaine @PirateBallerina at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (2oU2+)

75 Have you ever seen Ted Cruz and Pauly Shore in the same room? O_o

Posted by: HR at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (ZKzrr)

76 If establishment GOP'ers WANT to make Cruz more popular, their whining about him is a damn good way to do it.

Posted by: irright at February 13, 2014 08:28 AM (8GKDa)

77 Yeah, the Left are determined to destroy Cruz.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (ZPrif)

78 Somebody should be able to work Ted into some Most Interesting Man In The World jokes.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (xWW96)

79 Great news, everyone! Thanks to some shrewd Republican maneuvering, there is now a 90% chance obama will not win in 2016. Thanks, Boehner and McConnell!

Posted by: Soothsayer says, at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (mQ2Jz)

80 69 Titanic sinking? Totally Ted Cruz's fault. Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 12:28 PM (jNNPU) A Joo sunk the Titanic. Iceberg. Or was it Goldberg?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (olDqf)

81

Who sold Phil Seymoor Hoffman his Ace of Spades heroin?

 

Say it with me:  Ted  Cruz sold him the Ace of Spades. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (TOk1P)

82 Remember though, there's nothing the GOP can do here, so might as well vote with Dems, and push Amnesty when they should be screaming from the rooftops about OCare. Because Strategery!

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (rCOda)

83
We have a lot to fear with Ted Cruz in the Senate.

Posted by: John F'n McCain at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (nQjHM)

84 Ted Cruz makes Chuck Norris look average.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (POpqt)

85 For the first time in his life, Chuck Norris has accepted someone as his equal.

Posted by: Meremortal at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (1Y+hH)

86 The GOP can't find a hill to die on because Ted Cruz stole all the hills.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 08:29 AM (jNNPU)

87 Another bumper sticker:  "Tyranny is just the government loving us".

Posted by: OCBill at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (rFipM)

88 I scanned the list of the 12 Republican senators that fell on their swords and voted with Mitch on the debt ceiling cloture vote and was astonished to see that Richard Burr's(NC) name was not to be found.

Posted by: mrp at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (JBggj)

89 Okay, senator or not Cruz can be the next President. Of the new Republic of Texas. Seconded.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (ndIek)

90 Lizzy!

Posted by: Meremortal at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (1Y+hH)

91 73 I don't know when the "hill to die on" meme for the GOP started but I'm glad at least one GOP dude is finding a hill to fight on. Thanks Ted. Posted by: ExSnipe at February 13, 2014 12:28 PM (LKJt3) Even when the leftists are in the minority, every hill for them is the one to die on. Perhaps there's a lesson here.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (olDqf)

92

Awww, Ted Cruz told the truth and people didn't like it and let their Representatives know?  Shame on him!  

 

[/sarc]

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (4df7R)

93 Any chance O'bumbles and teh Mooch will be exiled to Hawaii? I would pay for that.

Posted by: model_1066 at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (LIQGY)

94 A Canadian. The irony. But, then again... Alberta.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (IXrOn)

95 If establishment GOP'ers WANT to make Cruz more popular, their whining about him is a damn good way to do it. He's inside their OODA loop, no question about it.

Posted by: Harrison Bergeron at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (qNZ3I)

96 Have to agree, every time the GOP establishment pushes back on Cruz, I get out my checkbook and give him some campaign love. And the RNC can go screw itself.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (A98Xu)

97 Serious question ... is Cruz's popularity enough to galvanize a third party ? Oops, excuse me, a second party ?

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 13, 2014 08:30 AM (VXk4i)

98 93 You already are.

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:31 AM (6bMeY)

99
Ted Cruz is bad for America.

Posted by: Miss Lindsey Graham at February 13, 2014 08:31 AM (nQjHM)

100 Is that Chappelle running on the site? hehe Love him.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:31 AM (IXrOn)

101

Ted Cruz so doesn't give a shit that even the honey badger respects him.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 13, 2014 08:31 AM (4df7R)

102 Yeah, Cruz is our new conservative savior, rally around him, elevate him, give him power, them watch him become just like the rest of them. A great distraction for the masses, better scripted than pro wrestling. I'm done hoping and I'm done praying. Let it burn.

Posted by: UndercoverInLA at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (xVxeA)

103 Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 13, 2014 12:29 PM (rCOda) From the dead thread below: When the rank and file threatens to vote with the Democrats, they are traitors. When the leadership does so, it's fine.

Posted by: Meremortal at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (1Y+hH)

104 If these guys ever decided to honor Reagan's "Commandment", they'd be running this country in two minutes.

Posted by: Optimizer at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (saDM3)

105

The TED meetings,  showing off the brilliance and ideas of people from all over the world, are  of course  named  in honor of  Ted  Cruz.

 

 

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (B5y+v)

106
I would never suck Ted Cruz' dick.

Posted by: Michael Sam at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (nQjHM)

107 Cruz was, clearly, weakened tremendously by the shutdown fight in October of last year. Clearly.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (2x+V2)

108 Isn't he Canadian?

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:32 AM (6bMeY)

109 98 93 You already are. Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 12:31 PM (6bMeY) Really? What guarantee do I have that he will stay there? And finally, finally, shut the fuck up for once in his miserable, poorly educated, scumbag life?

Posted by: model_1066 at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (LIQGY)

110 Ted Cruz is Good Cop.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (IXrOn)

111 107 Cruz was, clearly, weakened tremendously by the shutdown fight in October of last year. Clearly. Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 13, 2014 12:32 PM (2x+V2) hahahaÂ…Good one.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (A98Xu)

112 What about MC Escher?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 12:28 PM (olDqf)



Escher was the best.  Images:  http://tinyurl.com/lhed3qe

Dude must have had the most wicked dreams.



Posted by: Sharkman at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (TM1p8)

113 Ted Cruz has a boner for Bohner.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (xWW96)

114

Ted Cruz  has in his possession the original long form of Barack H. Obama's birth certificate.

 

He won't release it because  he  hates  you. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (TOk1P)

115 106 I would never suck Ted Cruz' dick. Posted by: Michael Sam at February 13, 2014 12:32 PM (nQjHM) He doesn't have a dick. He has a great emancipator.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (olDqf)

116

Ted Cruz is out delivering food and hot coffee to D.C. shut-ins today. 

 

He already shoveled out the Pentagon, vowing that "America's defense will not be hampered by a little snowstorm!".

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (B5y+v)

117 93 Any chance O'bumbles and teh Mooch will be exiled to Hawaii? I would pay for that. Posted by: model_1066

Well, they do have that Mystery Mansion waiting for them....

Posted by: backhoe at February 13, 2014 08:33 AM (ULH4o)

118 Has anyone elsen noticed that Ted Cruz has little tiny hands? It's amazing how hard he can bitchslap with hands so small.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (jNNPU)

119 The Most Interesting Man in the World (tm) says he wants to be Ted Cruz when he grows up.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (POpqt)

120 Think about this for a minute: Right now Republicans are saying nicer things about Al Qaeda in Syria than Ted Cruz. #Time for enema in the GOP

Posted by: Soothsayer says, at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (mQ2Jz)

121 88 - mrp - Me too. I had a red-hot letter in mind to fire off to him, and a phone call. It is always possible that he remembers what happened when he voted for cloture during the shut-down. He heard plenty from me then.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (aDwsi)

122

RELEASE THE CRUZ MISSILE!

 

I still like "Put America on Cruz Control!"

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (zF6Iw)

123 118 Has anyone elsen noticed that Ted Cruz has little tiny hands? It's amazing how hard he can bitchslap with hands so small. Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 12:34 PM (jNNPU) More Pounds per square inch...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (84gbM)

124 You know, with the flood and the big boat?

Spoiler alert: Ted Cruz caused the flood.

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 12:26 PM (TOk1P)



Hmmm, I thought the movie focused on environmental spoliation (because of all the SUVs that Hammurabi forced his people to drive) and overpopulation (because the 1 million or so people who lived 15K years ago was just too much for the planet to handle.

Yep.  Ted Cruz alright.

Posted by: Sharkman at February 13, 2014 08:34 AM (TM1p8)

125 Ted Cruz does not need to read books. When he glares at them they give up all their information voluntarily.

Posted by: LFW - Honorary Pointy Eared Vulcan at February 13, 2014 08:35 AM (XiVKO)

126 So, if Superman bears Jack Bauer underwear, does this mean that Jack Bauer wears Ted Cruz underwear?

Posted by: Optimizer at February 13, 2014 08:35 AM (saDM3)

127 102 Yeah, Cruz is our new conservative savior, rally around him, elevate him, give him power, them watch him become just like the rest of them. A great distraction for the masses, better scripted than pro wrestling. I'm done hoping and I'm done praying. Let it burn. Posted by: UndercoverInLA at February 13, 2014 12:32 PM (xVxeA) ----------------------------------------------------- Dude. We are having fun. If Ted went rino (Cruz forbid) we'd drop him like a hot Rubio... And then Ted would cunt-punt us over the moon.

Posted by: irright at February 13, 2014 08:35 AM (8GKDa)

128 Posted by: Meremortal at February 13, 2014 12:32 PM (1Y+hH) Thanks for reposting that here. I thought it bore repeating, but by the time I read it, the thread was dead.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 13, 2014 08:36 AM (rCOda)

129

Senator Cruz is playing you like flutes. He isnt stupid enough to think that a position of intransigence on immigration reform will work. We cant have as many people running around undocumented, as we have right now. Amnesty is inevitable, not for the sake of these people, but because their presence is problematic for us. We're missing an opportunity to get as much as possible in return for compromising with Democrats and committing Democrats to that compromise.

 

I must implore every sane Republican to be reasonable on this subject and dont listen to the members of the tea-party hordes, who are not happy untill they made counter-productive, xenophobic noise!

Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 08:36 AM (Qk76p)

130 Ted Cruz stopped AGW this Winter;  so, the 'polar vortex' is all his fault

Posted by: confused, disoriented MFM at February 13, 2014 08:36 AM (omBWL)

131 Iron Man movies are thinly disguised biographical pieces on  Ted's  life.

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:36 AM (B5y+v)

132 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a malignant traitor.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:36 AM (PYAXX)

133 You know... I was working at work right up until the power went out...

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:36 AM (PYAXX)

134 Has anyone elsen noticed that Ted Cruz has little tiny hands? It's amazing how hard he can bitchslap with hands so small.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 12:34 PM (jNNPU)

 

As long as they're not like a doll's hands...

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (4df7R)

135 94 A Canadian. The irony. But, then again... Alberta. Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 12:30 PM (IXrOn) ************ Were they from Alberta? That does make sense.

Posted by: tasker at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (RJMhd)

136 @116 'Ted Cruz is out delivering food and hot coffee to D.C. shut-ins today. He already shoveled out the Pentagon, vowing that "America's defense will not be hampered by a little snowstorm!".' LOL Well, he WAS born in Canada! (But he sounds like a Buffalonian, to me, at least regarding snow).

Posted by: Optimizer at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (saDM3)

137 Has anyone elsen noticed that Ted Cruz has little tiny hands? It's amazing how hard he can bitchslap with hands so small.

Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 12:34 PM (jNNPU)

 

Oh, and he ain't slappin' with his hands, IYKWIMAITYD

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (4df7R)

138

Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p)

Surely it hurts to be that fucking stupid.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (xWW96)

139 And finally, finally, shut the fuck up for once in his miserable, poorly educated, scumbag life?

He's never going to shut up.  People will pay him to continue to read assorted lies and smears off a Teleprompter for the rest of his life. 

Last time I checked, Clenis had made a quarter-billion on speaking fees.

Posted by: HR at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (ZKzrr)

140 Cruz just opened his freezer and destroyed the whole East Coast.

Posted by: dfbaskwill at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (ndlFj)

141 Meanwhile, out here in the hinterlands we don't need Ted Cruz to tell us that the House desperately wants to sell us out on amnesty. We have Drew M. for that.


Heh heh heh.

Posted by: alexthechick - oh great SMOD can you wait til curling's done at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (Gk3SS)

142 Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p) Here, you dropped this **hands over missing /sarc tag**

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (PYAXX)

143 Think about this for a minute: Right now Republicans are saying nicer things about Al Qaeda in Syria than Ted Cruz. --------- Of you just don't understand politics.

Posted by: Jazzie Halley at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (Aif/5)

144 Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p) Pigilio's girlfriend.

Posted by: Mr. Dave at February 13, 2014 08:37 AM (q3qkr)

145 Ted Cruz is now Emmanuel Goldstein. Except the Two Minutes Hate is directed at him by the so-called party of Opposition. God I fucking hate the GOPe. Stupid fucking motherfuckers. (sorry, Gipper. I tried to stay loyal to the party I joined because of you. But if you were still with us, I think you'd understand.)

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 08:38 AM (7ObY1)

146

Somebody should be able to work Ted into some Most Interesting Man In The World jokes.

 

When he was born, his mother had an orgasm.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 08:38 AM (zF6Iw)

147 I hope a couple of our regulars show up here and tell us how to think about this post. We always need the rational people (unlike us) to tell us what's what.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:38 AM (A98Xu)

148 Begonia, the stylebook dictates you should call us "teatards.". I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul

Posted by: DangerGirl and her Sanity Prod (tm) at February 13, 2014 08:38 AM (jNNPU)

149 Isn't there a prohibition in the Constitution about electing Icebacks to the Whitehouse?

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:38 AM (6bMeY)

150 *readjusts schadenboehner*

Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 08:38 AM (Kkt/i)

151 When  our  children  used up  their  Ted Cruz coloring books we were amazed to find the books had self-replicated and now the children have more adventures to happily color.  Its quiet in there!  Thanks Ted!

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:39 AM (B5y+v)

152 Thanks for reposting that here. I thought it bore repeating, but by the time I read it, the thread was dead. Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 13, 2014 12:36 Thanks for the opening....

Posted by: Meremortal at February 13, 2014 08:39 AM (1Y+hH)

153

129 -

 

Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p)

 

 

 

Ted Cruz reads comments like this,  and he actually UNDERSTANDS it! 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:39 AM (TOk1P)

154 He's um, he's the Senator from Canada. Tee hee hee.

Posted by: David Brooks at February 13, 2014 08:39 AM (2x+V2)

155 When he was born, his mother had an orgasm.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 12:38 PM (zF6Iw)

Heh. Nice.

Posted by: maddogg at February 13, 2014 08:39 AM (xWW96)

156 Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p) Hey, letsall writelike thetroll Itsfun nothavingto usegrammar oranything.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (7ObY1)

157 149 Isn't there a prohibition in the Constitution about electing Icebacks to the Whitehouse? Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 12:38 PM (6bMeY) Dual Citizenship for a President will not be an issue, until after Obama leaves Office... Then.... BAM!

Posted by: MSM at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (84gbM)

158 Nobody has ever seen Ted Cruz and Chuck Norris together. Explains a lot.

Posted by: Beagle at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (sOtz/)

159 Ted Cruz reads comments like this, and he actually UNDERSTANDS it! HA!

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (A98Xu)

160 Ted Cruz could force a peace in the Middle East.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (PYAXX)

161 Posted by: Begonia at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p) You're good. I didn't realize it was parody until the 4th sentence.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (rCOda)

162 heh. A remake of the 'Old Man & Human Resources' joke: Mitch McConnell: "Senator Cruz, what do you think is your greatest flaw?" Cruz: "I am honest." McConnell: "Well, I don't think honesty is flaw.." Cruz: "I don't give a shit what you think."

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (aDwsi)

163 @149 "Natural born citizen" means a [US] citizen by virtue of the circumstances of your birth. He had an American parent, IIRC, and so started off in life a US citizen.

Posted by: Optimizer at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (saDM3)

164 Even when the leftists are in the minority, every hill for them is the one to die on. Perhaps there's a lesson here. Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 13, 2014 12:30 PM (olDqf) The GOP should give the same lesson to the demonrats that the USMC gave the Japs when they tried their "hills to die on." They were almost always slaughtered.

Posted by: ExSnipe at February 13, 2014 08:40 AM (LKJt3)

165 A Canadian. The irony. But, then again... Alberta. Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 12:30 PM (IXrOn) ************ Were they from Alberta? That does make sense. Ted's dad was born in Cuba. Him mom in Wilmington, Deleware. Ted was born in Alberta while his parent's were there working in the oil bid'ness. They returned to Austin in '74.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 08:41 AM (ndIek)

166 Pigilio's girlfriend. Heh. Wasn't that the fucktard who tried to argue with ACE's amazing Amanda Knox post?

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 08:41 AM (7ObY1)

167 127 102 Yeah, Cruz is our new conservative savior, rally around him, elevate him, give him power, them watch him become just like the rest of them. A great distraction for the masses, better scripted than pro wrestling. I'm done hoping and I'm done praying. Let it burn. Posted by: UndercoverInLA at February 13, 2014 12:32 PM (xVxeA) ----------------------------------------------------- Dude. We are having fun. If Ted went rino (Cruz forbid) we'd drop him like a hot Rubio... And then Ted would cunt-punt us over the moon. Posted by: irright at February 13, 2014 12:35 PM (8GKDa) It's amazing how clueless some people are even here. They attempt to denigrate Cruz by calling him a "conservative savior" or accusing people of being cult like or else calling him the flavor of the week. And then they continue to push with "oh you'd all start hating him if he came out in favor of blah blah blah." Well you're damn straight we would. Because it's not a cult like view where we love what he says because he said it. We hear what is said and like him because of it. Newsflash: we're not looking for a savior, we're looking for a leader.

Posted by: Buzzion at February 13, 2014 08:41 AM (gbv4q)

168 I hear Ted Cruz uses BOTH a crossbow AND a longbow.

Posted by: RoyalOil at February 13, 2014 08:41 AM (VjL9S)

169 Ted Cruz once ate a box of donuts  in Reno,  just to make Meggie Mac cry.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 08:42 AM (zF6Iw)

170 They would have gotten away with it if it hadn't been for that meddling Cruz!

Posted by: Jon in TX at February 13, 2014 08:42 AM (PYAXX)

171 I hear Ted Cruz uses BOTH a crossbow AND a longbow. At the same time.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:42 AM (PYAXX)

172 But, but, but, my nephew's abuela is being threatened with deportation!

Posted by: Juan Williams, chief FoxNews leftist punching bag at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (tmFlQ)

173 I'm a minor local GOP party leader and you should hear the little establishment bitches whine when somebody actually stands up for platform principles. To them, the party is a) a way to enrich themselves b) a social club, a.k.a. a way to meet other like-minded thieves. c) a way to personally cfuk their enemies d) a way to launder donations e) all of the above Their motto: "Nothing wrong with a huge powerful government as long as the 'right people' are in charge. We are on the verge of a house cleaning as we get more liberty activists involved, but by God it's an uphill climb with these assholes running the show.

Posted by: Hurricane LaFawnduh at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (q/jNW)

174 The Senate is on Cruz Control!

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (B5y+v)

175 Ted Cruz *does* tug on Superman's cape, pull the mask off of the Lone Ranger, AND mess around with Jim.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (PYAXX)

176 13 And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for that meddling Cruz!

Posted by: Old Man Jenkins/Boehner at February 13, 2014 12:18 PM (FJYfm)

 

Gah, someone beat me to it.

Posted by: Jon in TX at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (PYAXX)

177 Always glad to receive my fresh  marching orders from Ted Cruz, as I obviously can't think for myself (unlike the intellectuals on the prog side).

Posted by: Hrothgar at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (o3MSL)

178 it just changed to Thunderstruck depending on the program, there has to be one or two changes of tempo. IANASkater, but I dated one for a couple of years.

Posted by: Fox2! at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (cHwSy)

179
Ted Cruz inherited the WarCock from Dick Cheney.

Posted by: Doctor Fish at February 13, 2014 08:43 AM (nQjHM)

180 Ted Cruzstein and Drew Mstein. Both of them ROCK.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (HVff2)

181 the plan was dead on arrival because Cruz blasted it as 'amnesty'
That's why I say "Hey Man, nice shot!"

Posted by: fluffy at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (Ua6T/)

182 143 Think about this for a minute: Right now Republicans are saying nicer things about Al Qaeda in Syria than Ted Cruz. *angry stare*

Posted by: John McCain at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (HJcb1)

183 IANASkater, but I dated one for a couple of years. Are they as bendy as they look? Inquiring Moron Minds want to know.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (PYAXX)

184 Newsflash: we're not looking for a savior, we're looking for a leader.

Posted by: Buzzion at February 13, 2014 12:41 PM (gbv4q)Exactly. No longer impressed by an "R". I'm looking for a "C".

Posted by: tubal at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (YEQ2h)

185 Ted Cruz gets shirts from Mr. Paul Anka's closet.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (zF6Iw)

186 13 And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for that meddling Cruz! Posted by: Old Man Jenkins/Boehner at February 13, 2014 12:18 PM (FJYfm) Ruh Roh.... Cruz got away with it!

Posted by: Meddling Kids at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (84gbM)

187 Ted Cruz sees no hills to die on, only the tiny hills of his enemies' graves. Which he dances on.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 13, 2014 08:44 AM (POpqt)

188 Hey, can anyone get me Ted's autograph?  For a friend.

Posted by: Jay Carney at February 13, 2014 08:45 AM (B5y+v)

189 Ted Cruz can make a stone so heavy he can't lift it. But then he lifts it anyway.

Posted by: Beagle at February 13, 2014 08:45 AM (sOtz/)

190 @129

"We're missing an opportunity to get as much as possible in returnfor compromising with Democrats and committing Democrats to that compromise. "

Because all past experiences have shown the GOP to brilliant strategists,  masters of negotiation, and steadfast and principled enforcers?  Maybe in bizarro world.

Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 08:45 AM (Kkt/i)

191 Last fall I made my liberal brother-in-law reverse tactics toot sweet when he made a big deal about "filibuster" and "Ted Cruz" with a sneer. How the "filibuster" was "wasting his time." Not sure how, as he is self-employed, but, hey! He watches CNN!

 He should have known better than to mess with me with my gin and tonic (as that is how I deal with in-laws. Liver on vacay now or until next trip West). As soon as I defended "filibuster" as, duh, it is not the first time you ignorant ninnyhammer lazy stoner and both parties do it (I threw in the dead KKK from WV Byrd's name as well, just to flip him out...and would bet he had no freaking idea who I was talking about). At that point he cut to his passive aggressive whiny pants yada. Then he smeared Cruz and I said "I like him." That made him run outside to have a cig. #poothead

So, anyway, if I use head-sploding barometer of in-laws as any type of reasoning on how his campaign (and my relationships) will go, as well as whoever the biased media smears (they are currently more afraid of Christie), well: go for it, Cruz!

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 08:45 AM (baL2B)

192 Heh. Ted Cruz is the reincarnation of Pecos Bill.

Posted by: LFW - Honorary Pointy Eared Vulcan at February 13, 2014 08:45 AM (kZVsz)

193 If only you people would listen to the more rational, even-handed Republicans that post here, you would continue to enjoy the successes of the GOP.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 13, 2014 08:46 AM (rCOda)

194 Their motto: "Nothing wrong with a huge powerful government as long as the 'right people' are in charge.

Posted by: Hurricane LaFawnduh at February 13, 2014 12:43 PM (q/jNW)


That is the universal statist mantra, beloved by progressive and pseudo-conservative alike.  But to be perfectly fair, you proles are really all the same and just need a firm guiding hand.

Posted by: Hrothgar at February 13, 2014 08:46 AM (o3MSL)

195 First: daily reminder- all trolls are Average Joe. Second: Mockery is better than argument with people past a certain level of dumb.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:46 AM (PYAXX)

196

185 Ted Cruz gets shirts from Mr. Paul Anka's closet

=====================================

 

Ted Cruz taught Mr. Paul Anka how to organize fractious bastards and get them playing the same tune.  Mr. Paul Anka worships Ted.

Posted by: Jay Carney at February 13, 2014 08:46 AM (B5y+v)

197 >169 Ted Cruz once ate a box of donuts in Reno, just to make Meggie Mac cry.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 12:42 PM (zF6Iw)<



*golf clap*

Posted by: Muad'dib at February 13, 2014 08:47 AM (sjdRT)

198 Ted Cruz simply walks into  Mordor. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:47 AM (TOk1P)

199

Way to go Ted! He must be the only one that can get the "GOP leadership" to vote on the record.

 

Invertebrate, feckless GOP. Cfuk'em.

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at February 13, 2014 08:47 AM (cDwCa)

200 sorry, Gipper. I tried to stay loyal to the party I joined because of you. But if you were still with us, I think you'd understand.) Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 12:38 PM (7ObY1) Well BlueState Rebel that isn't very nice, but it is understandable.

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at February 13, 2014 08:47 AM (HVff2)

201 Cruz can eat just one Lays potato chip. Cruz also knows damn well that it's not butter.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 08:47 AM (aDwsi)

202 Ted Cruz gets between Chris Christie and a buffet table.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:47 AM (PYAXX)

203
Ted Cruz mind fucked Kim Kardashian to keep his dick clean. 

Posted by: Governor Rick Perry at February 13, 2014 08:48 AM (nQjHM)

204 198 Ted Cruz simply walks into Mordor. Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 12:47 PM (TOk1P) Hmmm.... As the Mountain came to Mohamed... Mt. Doom came to Ted Cruz...

Posted by: Out of Work Nazgul at February 13, 2014 08:48 AM (84gbM)

205 I saw Xenophobicnoise open for Rammsteinn in the early 90's.

Posted by: RWC at February 13, 2014 08:48 AM (J2J7+)

206 The Hair Club for men just changed their motto to "Only your barber and Ted Cruz will know for sure."

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:48 AM (PYAXX)

207 Ted Cruz simply walks into Mordor.

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 12:47 PM (TOk1P)


Ted Cruz simply strolls into Mordor.

Posted by: Hrothgar at February 13, 2014 08:49 AM (o3MSL)

208 You guys get Andy was being sarcastic? Why?

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:49 AM (A98Xu)

209 Posted by: Begonia Teaphobic at February 13, 2014 12:36 PM (Qk76p) fify

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:49 AM (IXrOn)

210

Ted Cruz knows where Joe is.

 

And he rides Vinny Falcone's ass.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 08:49 AM (zF6Iw)

211 Their motto: "Nothing wrong with a huge powerful government as long as the 'right people' are in charge.

-

Runners up:

To get along, go along.

Don't make waves.

Don't rock the boat.

Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 08:49 AM (XUKZU)

212 Moar cowbell is  just  Ted Cruz  tribute  music secretly put forth by Ted's  many  lefty fans.

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:49 AM (B5y+v)

213 Ted Cruz simply walks into Mordor. Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 12:47 PM (TOk1P) Ted Cruz simply strolls into Mordor. Posted by: Hrothgar at February 13, 2014 12:49 PM (o3MSL) Ted Cruz rides a Harley into Mordor.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:50 AM (IXrOn)

214 208 You actually read the posts?

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 08:50 AM (6bMeY)

215 Waldo? He hiding from Ted Cruz.... who is not looking for him...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 13, 2014 08:50 AM (84gbM)

216 When he was born, his mother had an orgasm. Um, gross. Icky icky icky.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 08:50 AM (9PrpA)

217 Ted Cruz doesn't get fined for turning his library books in late; the library pays him for holding onto them.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:50 AM (PYAXX)

218 Cruz knows Calgon's 'ancient Chinese secret.'

Posted by: RWC at February 13, 2014 08:50 AM (J2J7+)

219 Ted Cruz'  scissors  cuts  both paper  AND rock. 

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:51 AM (TOk1P)

220 TEA CONNNNNNSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

/Kirk

Posted by: John Boehner at February 13, 2014 08:51 AM (5ikDv)

221 Ted Cruz understands quantum theory.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:51 AM (PYAXX)

222
Ted Cruz turned down the role of Booger in Revenge of the Nerds.

Posted by: Holywood Talent Agent at February 13, 2014 08:51 AM (nQjHM)

223 218 Cruz knows Calgon's 'ancient Chinese secret.'

Posted by: RWC at February 13, 2014 12:50 PM (J2J7+)Nutmeg.

Posted by: tubal at February 13, 2014 08:51 AM (YEQ2h)

224 @216 I don't see how orgasm can add any gross to birth all by itself.

Posted by: Beagle at February 13, 2014 08:52 AM (sOtz/)

225 Ted Cruz is a floor wax AND a dessert topping.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 08:52 AM (7ObY1)

226 You actually read the posts? Isn't that a barrel offense? It's getting lonely in here, quick somebody, cut and paste something from Word.

Posted by: The Barrel [/i] at February 13, 2014 08:52 AM (CnA98)

227 I would continue this line of comment, but, unlike Ted Cruz, my body is weak and requires food. Ted Cruz, of course, eats only for pleasure, since the nutrients queue up all on their own to be absorbed into his bloodstream.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 08:53 AM (PYAXX)

228
   Now hark back to the last time immigration reform was brought up.

   Remember the phone blitz, e-mails, etc.

    Takeaway?

    You CAN make a difference--told y'all that repeatedly.

Posted by: irongrampa at February 13, 2014 08:53 AM (SAMxH)

229 Better trade-up for conservatives... Kay Bailey Hutchinson for Cruz or Jim Bunning for Rand Paul?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 13, 2014 08:53 AM (/Crba)

230 Ted Cruz simply strolls into Mordor. Posted by: Hrothgar at February 13, 2014 12:49 PM (o3MSL) Ted Cruz soul train line dances into Mordor. Like a boss!

Posted by: RWC at February 13, 2014 08:53 AM (J2J7+)

231 So, when the GOP doesn't realize the super mega-wave they think Obamacare will give them effortlessly, the hate they have for Cruz now will look like a romance. Given that we're in uncharted territory, I have sincere and persistent doubts the GOP is right that Obamacare's epic failure will catapult them to victory.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 08:54 AM (9PrpA)

232 Ted Cruz, Bad Cop. Seriously, they wanted immigration reform to go away in the worst way. Blame it on your favorite boogie man and never speak of it again.

Posted by: AmishDude at February 13, 2014 08:54 AM (T0NGe)

233 CRUZ CONTROL!!!

Posted by: Dang at February 13, 2014 08:54 AM (MNq6o)

234 Ted   is  so  good  he  convinced me that I'm the wacko-bird!

Posted by: John McCain at February 13, 2014 08:55 AM (B5y+v)

235 Quislings, whores, and thieves Wanna pass the amnesty to kill work wages...

Posted by: Zombie Cher (well, the other one) at February 13, 2014 08:55 AM (QLbhS)

236

(This one goes too far)

 

Did you know Ted Cruz was a prisoner at Auchwitz? 

 

It's true!  He was such  good worker though, they set him free. 

 

(I'm sorry)

Posted by: BurtTC at February 13, 2014 08:55 AM (TOk1P)

237 So Comcast basically owns everything now?

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (ZPrif)

238 Ted Cruz runs with scissors.

Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (Kkt/i)

239 Kinda ot. Schadenboner alert. Colorado Health-Exchange Director Indicted for Fraud, Theft. http://tinyurl.com/keluh42

Posted by: YIKES! at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (mETGQ)

240 - 171 I hear Ted Cruz uses BOTH a crossbow AND a longbow. At the same time. Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 12:42 PM ----------------------------------- I call it the crongbow.

Posted by: T.C. at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (8GKDa)

241 Seriously, they wanted immigration reform to go away in the worst way. Blame it on your favorite boogie man and never speak of it again. The Chamber of Commerce has that much power that the GOP are lemmings for them?

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (9PrpA)

242 Ted Cruz used to do seabed surveys.  He did not need a sounding chain.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (6TB1Z)

243 OT, but in local news here in Crystal Lake, IL, black middle school kid being charged with hate crime, after attack on other student in school cafeteria. Delicious. The afrikaan amerikaan, a seventh-grader, jumped and beat up an Iranian eighth-grader, smashing him to the floor, flailing him, with the Persian kid sustaining two broken collarbones. The words from Mr Tough Guy Gangsta before the rumble, were "hey, persian, you want to fight a black man?" Eric Holder will be on the case, fo' sho'. In many ways, this is the story of Barack Obama.

Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 13, 2014 08:56 AM (tmFlQ)

244

237 So Comcast basically owns everything now?

===============================

 

They don't own Ted! 

Posted by: MTF at February 13, 2014 08:57 AM (B5y+v)

245
Ted Cruz was never in Cambodia on a special mission for the nation, and was never awarded three Purple Hearts. 

Posted by: John F'n Kerry at February 13, 2014 08:57 AM (nQjHM)

246 Ted Cruz thinks what's best in life is:

1- To crush your enemies.
2- See them driven before you, and
3- To hear the lamentations of their women....and RINOs.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 13, 2014 08:57 AM (POpqt)

247 Shannon Bream ‏@ShannonBream 34s SensCruz/Lee intro bill that would force fed govt to defer to state marriage laws - say admin finds "principles of federalism inconvenient"

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at February 13, 2014 08:57 AM (DmNpO)

248 Superman, Batman, and the Joker all sleep in Ted Cruz jammies.

Posted by: jwpaine @PirateBallerina at February 13, 2014 08:57 AM (2oU2+)

249 If it were WW2 at the Battle of Leyte Gulf: The dems would be the Japanese. The GOP would be Halsey. Ted Cruz would be Taffy 3.

Posted by: ExSnipe at February 13, 2014 08:57 AM (LKJt3)

250

For anyone that knocks Cruz and the Tea Party, I've got one thing to say:

 

Go get your fucking shine box.

 

This is how it's done.

Posted by: prescient11 at February 13, 2014 08:58 AM (tVTLU)

251 Ted Cruz is pudding.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:58 AM (IXrOn)

252 Ted Cruz's second album was better than his first.

Posted by: Beagle at February 13, 2014 08:58 AM (sOtz/)

253 The COC is vermin in my book. Also the "junior" version.

Posted by: backhoe at February 13, 2014 08:58 AM (ULH4o)

254 Last time I checked, Clenis had made a quarter-billion on speaking fees.

Posted by: HR at February 13, 2014 12:37 PM (ZKzrr)



File under "Fools and their Money".  The worst was when I heard he delivered a load of horseshit to some jooooos in Canada when the draft dodger talked about how he'd take up arms to fight for Israel.  I think he raped those people worse than Juanita Broaddrick.

Posted by: Captain Hate at February 13, 2014 08:58 AM (c3zQp)

255 Ted Cruz makes Chris Christie look like a Light Weight.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette: Countdown to V-Day... at February 13, 2014 08:58 AM (IXrOn)

256

This give a new meaning to TED talks

Posted by: The Jackhole at February 13, 2014 08:59 AM (nTgAI)

257 Persian kid sustaining two broken collarbones. That poor kid.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 08:59 AM (9PrpA)

258 Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at February 13, 2014 12:57 PM So that haven't got it through their thick skulls to STFU until after the election?

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 08:59 AM (A98Xu)

259 Here's the press release re that last comment: http://t.co/F6OIHAQBvC

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at February 13, 2014 08:59 AM (DmNpO)

260 Ted Cruz shoots broadswords out of his crossbow.

Posted by: Dang at February 13, 2014 08:59 AM (MNq6o)

261 They would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for that meddling Cuban-Canadian-Texan!

Posted by: McGehee at February 13, 2014 08:59 AM (D0kWg)

262 Hmm. Seems Senator Cruz is the Emmanuel Goldstein of not only the Dems but also the GOPe. Nice. And notice that it's not important what their voters actually think. Darn you to heck, Cruz!

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (r+7wo)

263 Cruz can eat just one Lays potato chip.

Cruz also knows damn well that it's not butter.

When Ted Cruz enters a grocery store, Mr. Whipple squeezes the Charmin for him.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (6TB1Z)

264 Ted Cruz is the bigger boat.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (aDwsi)

265 Ted Cruz knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.

Posted by: RWC at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (J2J7+)

266 Posted by: Captain Hate at February 13, 2014 12:58 PM (c3zQp)

I had a revelation the other day.  I decided that Bill Clinton was really Boyd Crowder with a law degree.

Posted by: Hrothgar at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (o3MSL)

267 So that haven't got it through their thick skulls to STFU until after the election? *** It's never a bad time to fight for states' rights.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (DmNpO)

268 (sorry, Gipper. I tried to stay loyal to the party I joined because of you. But if you were still with us, I think you'd understand.) Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 12:38 PM (7ObY1) He would. He stated: "I didn't leave my party, my party left me."

Posted by: D-Lamp at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (bb5+k)

269 Didn't Cruz discover Peruvia?

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at February 13, 2014 09:00 AM (HVff2)

270 Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 13, 2014 12:56 PM (tmFlQ) Interesting.... now we will see WHICH Race is more protected...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 13, 2014 09:01 AM (84gbM)

271 Dual Citizenship for a President will not be an issue, until after Obama leaves Office... Then.... BAM! Posted by: MSM at February 13, 2014 12:40 PM (84gbM) You joke, but I see this as very likely occurring.

Posted by: D-Lamp at February 13, 2014 09:01 AM (bb5+k)

272 In many ways, this is the story of Barack Obama. Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 13, 2014 12:56 PM (tmFlQ) This will never get old.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:02 AM (r+7wo)

273 Meanwhile, out here in the hinterlands we don't need Ted Cruz to tell us that the House desperately wants to sell us out on amnesty. We have Drew M. for that. So...has anyone actually seen Ted Cruz and Drew M at the same time? Is Drew M == Ted Cruz?

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie © at February 13, 2014 09:02 AM (1hM1d)

274 He would. He stated: "I didn't leave my party, my party left me." So true, D-Lamp, so true. And so sad that Reagan said that about the Dems, but I have to say it about the GOP.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:02 AM (7ObY1)

275 GOPe

What is this?

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:02 AM (6TB1Z)

276 GOP establishment

Posted by: Chris Balsz at February 13, 2014 09:02 AM (5xmd7)

277 Ted Cruz was never in Cambodia on a special mission for the nation, and was never awarded three Purple Hearts.

Posted by: John F'n Kerry

Ted Cruz doesn't have a lucky hat.

He has Brill Cream.

Posted by: weft cut-loop[/i] [/b] at February 13, 2014 09:02 AM (cxs6V)

278 Ted Cruz doesn't wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

Posted by: the Butcher at February 13, 2014 09:03 AM (8g9qq)

279 You joke, but I see this as very likely occurring. Posted by: D-Lamp at February 13, 2014 01:01 PM (bb5+k) Who said I was joking...

Posted by: Cassandra at February 13, 2014 09:03 AM (84gbM)

280 It's never a bad time to fight for states' rights. Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at February 13, 2014 01:00 PM (DmNpO) I was being sarcastic. And you're right, it's always a good time to fight for states' rights.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 09:03 AM (A98Xu)

281 Ted Cruz for President, Congress, Senate and Ambassador.  Apparently, he is the only person who can get anything done in Washington that doesn't screw the American taxpayer!

Posted by: Stacy at February 13, 2014 09:03 AM (jJMNa)

282 The afrikaan amerikaan, a seventh-grader, jumped and beat up an Iranian eighth-grader, smashing him to the floor, flailing him, with the Persian kid sustaining two broken collarbones. That sounds vaguely familiar.

Posted by: George Zimmerman at February 13, 2014 09:03 AM (T0NGe)

283 163 @149 "Natural born citizen" means a [US] citizen by virtue of the circumstances of your birth. He had an American parent, IIRC, and so started off in life a US citizen. Posted by: Optimizer at February 13, 2014 12:40 PM (saDM3) No it doesn't, but I don't want to get into it. I suggest we simply avoid the topic ala Ted Cruz. I want him to win, and I don't give a shit if he doesn't qualify under the original meaning.

Posted by: D-Lamp at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (bb5+k)

284 I hope Cruz has good protection. Our dear leader and his minions don't like this kind of thing.

Posted by: spypeach at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (10H0T)

285 So...has anyone actually seen Ted Cruz and Drew M at the same time? Is Drew M == Ted Cruz? I am Ted Cruz.

Posted by: Spartacus at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (T0NGe)

286 GOPe What is this? I think it's Grand Old Party of Extremism.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (9PrpA)

287
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 12:49 PM (zF6Iw)

I sent you an email at your Kiss Me My Fool address about a story topic.

In case you don't get it: Conway Tearle

I'm sure you can start our morning with some interesting stuff about him for at least one day.

Posted by: Ed Anger at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (tOkJB)

288
Ted Cruz is probably married to a white woman like Clarence Thomas, or possibly a very dark Mexican.

Posted by: Alvin Holmes at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (nQjHM)

289 If it is true that Ted Cruz killed immigration reform...I have a total mancrush on Ted Cruz.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:04 AM (4+AaH)

290 Ted Cruz can named that tune in zero notes.

Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 09:05 AM (Kkt/i)

291 I hate to stay on topic, but Ted Cruz remains impressive.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/s]akula51 at February 13, 2014 09:05 AM (ySU/u)

292 O/T but still fits here: Yahoo linked USA Today photo and article about Mooch's tarp dress at French State dinner. Every single one of the first group of comments (there are 4000 and I am not reading any more) were negative.

Some people, who voted for Baroque and Co. make less than that $12,000 dress a year. Let them eat her crumbs!

Another odd thing about the tented dinner, in freezing DC, was she used goldfish bowls for salad from her organic winter greenhouse.??? Why not bedpans? Dust pans? Flower pots? Bird's nests? What was this groovy point?

I am sure some of the people swilling booze on our dime were "wut?" And, at 2500 cals and 150 grams of fat, baby, that is so cool! Wear that $12K dress!

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:05 AM (baL2B)

293

Sorry for off topic comment.

 

Trying to find/navigate to Monty's incredible post from last week about the value of "work".

 

Any suggestions?  Thanks! 

Posted by: RM at February 13, 2014 09:06 AM (HWE+X)

294 O/T Has there been any word about the unionization vote at V.W. Tennessee?

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at February 13, 2014 09:06 AM (lo1uS)

295 286 GOPe What is this? I think it's Grand Old Party of Extremism. Posted by: bonhomme at February 13, 2014 01:04 PM (9PrpA) Grand Ole Party EXTINCTION?

Posted by: Cassandra at February 13, 2014 09:06 AM (84gbM)

296 Ted Cruz wants Charlie Crist to smell his finger.

Posted by: Fritz at February 13, 2014 09:07 AM (TKFmG)

297 Ted Cruz / James Woods 2016. I'm all in.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/s]akula51 at February 13, 2014 09:07 AM (ySU/u)

298 The bigger Comcast gets the bigger a problem MSNBC is for them. MSNBC is tiny, tiny source of revenue for Comcast.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at February 13, 2014 09:07 AM (ZPrif)

299 I am Ted Cruz.

Posted by: Spartacus at February 13, 2014 01:04 PM (T0NGe)

We are all Ted Cruz

Posted by: Ted Cruz at February 13, 2014 09:07 AM (x3YFz)

300
   Now amnesty seems to be on hold, it is time to put the same effort calling for border security and enforcing EXISTING immigration law.

   The structure is in place, NOW see to implementation.

   And hammer that theme unendingly.

Posted by: irongrampa at February 13, 2014 09:08 AM (SAMxH)

301 I don't know if I could vote for a Peruvian.

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (6bMeY)

302 That sounds vaguely familiar. Posted by: George Zimmerman Seriously. I saw so many people online explicitly saying Zimmerman should have just taken the beating; ignoring completely that people are maimed/mentally incapacitated/killed in fights all the time. It's not like in the movies where a person can get kicked in the head multiple times without brain damage. Additionally, say Martin stopped slamming Zimmerman's head into the concrete when he passed out. Now Zimmerman is completely helpless and at Martin's mercy. Zimmerman's supposed to trust that Martin will leave him alone? It's like those morons who argue that "stealing a TV isn't a capital offense." As if you know that's all a home invader is going to do.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (9PrpA)

303 What is meant please by "all trolls are Average Joe"?

Posted by: Son of Sven at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (DrC22)

304 299 I am Ted Cruz. Posted by: Spartacus at February 13, 2014 01:04 PM (T0NGe) We are all Ted Cruz Posted by: Ted Cruz at February 13, 2014 01:07 PM (x3YFz) Ah.... then prepare the Cruxifictions!

Posted by: GOP Preatorian Guard at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (84gbM)

305 O/T Has there been any word about the unionization vote at V.W. Tennessee? **** Ckufing Bob Corker http://reut.rs/1c2y8lU

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (DmNpO)

306
Ted Cruz faps to Blue Oyster Cults Godzilla!

Posted by: Casey Kasem at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (nQjHM)

307 Evel Knievel broke every bone in his body multiple times trying to do what Ted Cruz does on his day off.

Posted by: jwpaine @PirateBallerina at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (2oU2+)

308

Thanks, Ed.  I'll check  that out.

 

OK, I'm going to head home now through the snow.  Stay safe, everyone.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (zF6Iw)

309 When Cruz speaks, there is a disturbance in The Force.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (aDwsi)

310 Trying to find/navigate to Monty's incredible post from last week about the value of "work". Any suggestions? Thanks! Value of work? No, there is only value in freedom! I believe that any such posting did not meet the standards for Critical Information Needs, and was thus replaced by the OFA reviewer by a feelgood story about Bo, the Portuguese water dog. Whose story, really, is the story of Obama.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (4+AaH)

311 When you pull Ted's finger, everybody else farts.

Posted by: tcn at February 13, 2014 09:09 AM (fwcEs)

312
MFM: Comrades your 2 minutes hours of hate on racist, sexist, homophobe Cruz begins in 5...4...3

Posted by: TheQuietMan at February 13, 2014 09:10 AM (1Jaio)

313 Ted Cruz turned me into a newt. . . . I got better.

Posted by: Andy at February 13, 2014 09:10 AM (OAEPo)

314 Didn't Cruz discover Peruvia? Not only did Cruz discover Peruvia, he planted all of the native species of plants and bred all the native animals himself.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at February 13, 2014 09:10 AM (0HooB)

315 303 What is meant please by "all trolls are Average Joe"? Something internal. And sucks cock by choice.

Posted by: [/i][/b][/s]akula51 at February 13, 2014 09:10 AM (ySU/u)

316
Will no one rid us of this meddlesome tea partier?

Posted by: Teh GOP Establishment at February 13, 2014 09:10 AM (n0DEs)

317 @293

This?

http://ace.mu.nu/archives/346955.php

Or Ace's follow up?

http://ace.mu.nu/archives/346960.php

Posted by: flounder at February 13, 2014 09:11 AM (Kkt/i)

318 Santa Claus tries not to be on Ted Cruz's naughty list.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 09:11 AM (PYAXX)

319 blaster - I have a copy, not sure if I would get busted for re-posting?

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:11 AM (aDwsi)

320 So is Peruvia somewhere NEAR Canada? Cuz, well, I'm pretty sure Ted is Peruvian.

Posted by: tcn at February 13, 2014 09:11 AM (fwcEs)

321 In all seriousness, is there one better candidate?

Anyone?

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 09:12 AM (x3YFz)

322 288 Ted Cruz is probably married to a white woman like Clarence Thomas, or possibly a very dark Mexican. Clarence Thomas is a white woman?

Posted by: Barbra Streisand at February 13, 2014 09:12 AM (DrC22)

323 Worst red-eye flight, evah. I'm never going back to Sushi. Evah.

Posted by: Bob Costass at February 13, 2014 09:12 AM (Dwehj)

324 306 Ted Cruz faps to Blue Oyster Cults Godzilla! Heck, Ted Cruz played all the instruments on "Godzilla." Including the cowbell.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:12 AM (7ObY1)

325 Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 01:05 PM (baL2B) Link please, m'lady.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:13 AM (r+7wo)

326 271?

Yep.

Posted by: backhoe at February 13, 2014 09:13 AM (ULH4o)

327 323 Worst red-eye flight, evah. I'm never going back to Sushi. Evah. Posted by: Bob Costass at February 13, 2014 01:12 PM (Dwehj) Greg Gutfled said that Costas is advertising for Red Eye.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:13 AM (7ObY1)

328 Ted Cruz is probably married to a white woman like Clarence Thomas, or possibly a very dark Mexican. Clarence Thomas is a white woman? Well played. Golf clap.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:13 AM (ndIek)

329 @319 I wouldn't admit to having a copy. Pretend it is like Fahrenheit 451. Memorize it. Then we will reconstitute the works down by the river.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:14 AM (4+AaH)

330 300 Now amnesty seems to be on hold, it is time to put the same effort calling for border security and enforcing EXISTING immigration law. The structure is in place, NOW see to implementation I've been told by security guys working near the border in Texas that an enormous section of actual fence/cement is being built on the border. Do any of you morons know more about this?

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 09:14 AM (A98Xu)

331 In all seriousness, is there one better candidate?

Perhaps Rand.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 13, 2014 09:14 AM (uhAkr)

332 321 In all seriousness, is there one better candidate?

Anyone?

My biggest problem with Cruz is lack of executive experience.  It's often easier to be the insurgent than the one who actually governs.  However, given how well Cruz is playing the PTB, I'm not sure that's as big a problem as it used to be.  Pity Walker is an immigration squish.  Otherwise, Cruz/Walker or vv would be my choice for the ticket.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:14 AM (6TB1Z)

333 In all seriousness, is there one better candidate? Better "candidate" how? Would campaign better? Get more votes? Or "would make a better president?" Because I have no idea on the former, but on the latter I can think of two names off the top of my head- at least two that I'd rather see as President: Scott Walker and Rick Perry. Really, any conservative Governor (as opposed to Legislator) would be a better choice for President.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 09:14 AM (PYAXX)

334 286 GOPe What is this? GOPe = DOPe

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:15 AM (7ObY1)

335 Pulls off rubber mask... Everyone says, in unison: "The Chamber of Commerce!" "And we would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for that meddling Ted Cruz."

Posted by: AmishDude at February 13, 2014 09:15 AM (T0NGe)

336 My biggest problem with Cruz is lack of executive experience. It's often easier to be the insurgent than the one who actually governs. However, given how well Cruz is playing the PTB, I'm not sure that's as big a problem as it used to be. Pity Walker is an immigration squish. Otherwise, Cruz/Walker or vv would be my choice for the ticket.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 01:14 PM (6TB1Z)



Prezzy Choom: Yeah, you can't have just anyone run for president.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at February 13, 2014 09:15 AM (1Jaio)

337 Now amnesty seems to be on hold, it is time to put the same effort calling for border security and enforcing EXISTING immigration law. Considering this admin won't properly enforce any law...

Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 13, 2014 09:15 AM (naUcP)

338 Perhaps Rand. I like Rand Paul, but I'm nervous his Dad has instilled some of his kookiness in the lad.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:16 AM (9PrpA)

339 Here you go, chique:    http://tinyurl.com/lnmyazd

Hope it works. I hate the linky thing.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:16 AM (baL2B)

340 GOPe = NOPe

Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 13, 2014 09:16 AM (naUcP)

341 I wouldn't admit to having a copy. Pretend it is like Fahrenheit 451. Memorize it. Then we will reconstitute the works down by the river. In. A. Van.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:16 AM (ndIek)

342 As much as I like Ted Cruz, I still think that elected executives are better candidates for elected executive. Or, maybe - just maybe - if you won a major war. Then you get a pass on the elected executive prereq.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:16 AM (4+AaH)

343 332 It's often easier to be the insurgent than the one who actually governs. Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 01:14 PM (6TB1Z)

Word!

Posted by: Barack Obama at February 13, 2014 09:16 AM (Kkt/i)

344 Prezzy Choom: Yeah, you can't have just anyone run for president.
Posted by: TheQuietMan

I know, right?

Posted by: Hillary "you don't need no stinkin' security" Clinton at February 13, 2014 09:17 AM (6TB1Z)

345 Amnesty is never defeated, only delayed. Amnesty is only on hold until after primary season is over.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at February 13, 2014 09:17 AM (ZPrif)

346 My biggest problem with Cruz is lack of executive experience.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 01:14 PM (6TB1Z)

/looks at Obama
/looks back at comment
/laughs

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 09:17 AM (x3YFz)

347 Oh, and in reference to the title of this post: good!

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (0HooB)

348 #338 I like Rand Paul, but I'm nervous his Dad has instilled some of his kookiness in the lad. That's my only stumbling block too. But so far, Rand has avoided association with the Kemtrail Kidz wing of his father's base. And I keep reminding myself not to punish the son for the sins of the father.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (7ObY1)

349 Colorado Health-Exchange Director Indicted for Fraud, Theft.
http://tinyurl.com/keluh42

Posted by: YIKES!

Fraud?  Fraud? 

But who could have foreseen that in a bill with 2500 pages and 10k pages of rules and regulation?????

Posted by: weft cut-loop[/i] [/b] at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (cxs6V)

350

Ted Cruz and Chuck Norris walk into a wrestling ring.

 

Discuss...

Posted by: prescient11 at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (tVTLU)

351 Ted Cruz gives us little people hope. 

Posted by: carolina at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (V4hj9)

352 My biggest problem with Cruz is lack of executive
experience.


Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 01:14 PM (6TB1Z)


/looks at Obama
/looks back at comment
/laughs

It isn't like I voted for the guy. 

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (6TB1Z)

353 I haven't stopped laughing yet.

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 09:18 AM (x3YFz)

354 >>My biggest problem with Cruz is lack of executive experience. Well, he hasn't just been a Senator. From Wiki: >>He was Solicitor General of Texas from 2003 to May 2008, after being appointed by Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott.[2] He was the first Hispanic Solicitor General in Texas,[4] the youngest Solicitor General in the United States, and the longest-serving Solicitor General in Texas' history. He was also the first Hispanic, and the first minority to be elected U.S. Senator from Texas.[5] >>Between 1999 and 2003, Cruz served as the director of the Office of Policy Planning at the Federal Trade Commission, an Associate Deputy Attorney General at the United States Department of Justice, and as Domestic Policy Advisor to U.S. President George W. Bush on the 2000 Bush-Cheney campaign. In addition, Cruz was an Adjunct Professor of Law at the University of Texas School of Law in Austin, where he taught U.S. Supreme Court litigation, from 2004 to 2009. Not the same as being governor, but better than community organizing.

Posted by: Mama AJ at February 13, 2014 09:19 AM (SUKHu)

355 I actually would not have a problem with amnesty if they set up some serious border security and "E-verify --for everything not just employment, B) did away with the stupid 'chained' immigration AND C) had some real efforts to sweep up illegals 'living in the shadows'  working for money under the table so no FICA, workmens comp etc etc that has to be paid so their labor is much cheaper,  + in the shadows so their wife and kids are drawing welfare benefits as single parent families.    If they got a SS# and are paying all the normal citizen costs even though that is technically ID theft  I don't have a problem with amnesty for that subset, and I would not have a problem with "pay penalties to make up for the coasting you did and get a green card" for the rest. 

BUT with this administration (and I mean the ICE employees and other federal workers, not just Ear Leader)  we know that there would be no enforcement no matter what congress passed --and I am not even sure if congress can set the immigration rules and undo chained immigration or if the State Dept or some other agency gets to set that policy.  So yeah its stupid to even think about what might be a workable congressional solution for "undocumented aliens"  until/unless there is serious reform of  the administration/agencies.  

Posted by: PaleRider at February 13, 2014 09:19 AM (m+nIW)

356 Not the same as being governor, but better than community organizing.

That's a pretty low bar.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:19 AM (6TB1Z)

357 It's often easier to be the insurgent than the one who actually governs. --------------------------------- Prezzy Choom: Yeah, you can't have just anyone run for president. ------------------------ Pep's point is valid. The problem, of course, is that few politicians these days have any experience in anything..., except politics. That is the reason that Romney should have been a shoo-in. As we know, however, the MSM drive the bus, and 53% the people will buy into whatever the MSM sells them.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:19 AM (aDwsi)

358 So Ted Cruz joins the pantheon of terrifying names like the Koch brothers and Boooosh and Cheney? We would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling kids and Cruzzzzzzzzzzzz

Posted by: ParanoidGirlinSeattle at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (RZ8pf)

359 Can you believe that 52% of the voting mass voted for a "community organizer?" hahahahahahaÂ…Â…DOLTS

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (A98Xu)

360 Elected. Executive. Experience. Or win a major war. The current crisis is a clear example of why.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (4+AaH)

361 OT: None of us are really free unless we can chose from between 50 different genders.

MENLO PARK, Calif. (AP) — You don't have to be just male or female on Facebook anymore. The social media giant is adding a customizable option with about 50 different terms people can use to identify their gender as well as three preferred pronoun choices: him, her or them.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (XUKZU)

362 Thanks, ChristyB. That's actually a more flattering pic of the dress. I was quite horrified when I first saw a pic of it and commented that Michelle's stylists must really hate her. Tarp dress is an apt description. She should have removed the tarp layer, because it's actually a pretty dress without it, but I guess a queen has to have a train or something.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (r+7wo)

363 When Ted Cruz does push-ups, he remains stationary while the Earth moves back and forth.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (0HooB)

364 Really, any conservative Governor (as opposed to Legislator) would be a better choice for President. That used to be the prevailing thought. Governors made better presidents than senators due to executive experience. After choomster, it's still sound advice.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (ndIek)

365 >>No, Libby. That a LIE!!!! You can tell because she said so 3 times and linked to Mother Jones.

I have to do some binging to get the details, but the reason the Obama events are so "big" is that when they first arrived they fired the WH party organizer and replaced it with a guy who had a party planning business. Think they also changed who he reported to. So he plans the parties - which are outsourced to his business - and then "approves" the expenses. It's not your imagination that things are extravagant and over the top.

Posted by: Lizzy at February 13, 2014 09:20 AM (POpqt)

366 Big Oil.

Posted by: Boss Moss at February 13, 2014 09:21 AM (6bMeY)

367 Cruz has shown a deeper understanding of the Constitution than our current idiot in chief.  And also, seems, unlike Mr. Constitutional Professor (who's colleagues thought he was an idiot) has a sense of morality.

So, pep, who do you recommend instead?

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 09:21 AM (x3YFz)

368 Not the same as being governor, but better than community organizing. You know, the same is true of being Mayor of Wasilla. But, no, we hate chicks or something.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:21 AM (4+AaH)

369 Ted Cruz runs Bartertown.

Posted by: RWC at February 13, 2014 09:21 AM (J2J7+)

370 How many Ted Cruz's does it take to change a lightbulb? One. He just holds it and the world revolves around him.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:22 AM (7ObY1)

371 So Ted Cruz joins the pantheon of terrifying names like the Koch brothers and Boooosh and Cheney? -------------------- Amazing how quickly the Haliburton! meme died.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:22 AM (aDwsi)

372 Pulls off rubber mask... Everyone says, in unison: "The Chamber of Commerce!" "And we would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for that meddling Ted Cruz." (Insert Scooby laugh here -->>) Hehehehehehehehehe.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (ndIek)

373 Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 01:20 PM (XUKZU) Is "them" for schizophrenics? Is multiple personality disorder now a gender identity? I hope they included ze. I read somewhere that that is what some prefer. Personally, I prefer "it" for alternate identities. I denounce myself vehemently.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (r+7wo)

374 TED CRUZ KILLED MY BABY WITH HIS MIND!!

Posted by: NWConservative at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (CK5Fh)

375 Ted Cruz is the man who killed Gus Fring.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (7ObY1)

376 65 >>6 Why don't we just call everyone South of the Border a US Citizen, send them a check every month, and just get it over with? This isn't the Hill to die on.
Posted by: Republican "Leaders" at February 13, 2014 12:15 PM (ndlFj)

If we're doing -anything- along those lines ... offer statehood instead.

(First: Not happening, so the -actual- problems irrelevant).

But: The Democrats would EXPLODE. This -would- be a wedge issue for the Democrats. They -HATE- Imperialism. Hate, hate, hate. But on the other side, you have "You racist pig, why don't you want Mexicans to have American freedoms?!?"

I'd pick the province that armed itself and chased out the drug cartels over the government's objections myself.

Posted by: Al at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (9ynpo)

377 >>But, no, we hate chicks or something. It's complicated.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (SUKHu)

378 Colorado Health-Exchange Director Indicted for Fraud, Theft.

http://tinyurl.com/keluh42





Posted by: YIKES!

Fraud? Fraud?

But who could have foreseen that in a bill with 2500 pages and 10k pages of rules and regulation?????

-

She not accused of fraud through Obamacare.  She is accused of old fashioned fraud in her last job.

The 12-page indictment alleges that, while serving as executive director of the federally funded Housing Montana, McClure, between 2008 and 2010, paid herself “significant sums” for consulting services, although she was already on the payroll as a full-time employee.

She also made payments to her family and used federal money for personal travel, to pay family bills and to buy consulting services, the indictment alleges.

She also is accused of charging homeowners for a $750 warranty that did not exist, converting a laptop for personal use, inflating the hours she was to be compensated and writing herself a $21,000 check to which she was not entitled.


The classics never go out of style.


Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (XUKZU)

379 (Insert Scooby laugh here -->> Hehehehehehehehehe.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 01:23 PM (ndIek)

well played.

Posted by: tangonine at February 13, 2014 09:23 AM (x3YFz)

380 Bitcoin? Cruz runs it as entertainment while he has his first cup of coffee.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:24 AM (aDwsi)

381 Speaker Boner doesn't need and won't wait for a majority of his party to vote for it.  He'll pass Shamnesty the same way he caved on the budget, with Ryan and a few other cronies, like Pelosi.  His tears of angst will be proof of his pain in doing so.

Posted by: Born Free at February 13, 2014 09:24 AM (xL8Hf)

382 Fraud? Fraud? But who could have foreseen that in a bill with 2500 pages and 10k pages of rules and regulation????? Oh she wasn't clever about it. She didn't bend the law for her own purpose. She was officially working there as Director, and also hired herself as a consultant, and hired her family members as consultants, and snagged a work laptop and said, "This thing here is mine too." Basically she was an idiot.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:25 AM (9PrpA)

383 So, pep, who do you recommend instead?
Posted by: tangonine

I don't have a favorite at this point, because they all have significant flaws, and I haven't decided what I'll have to swallow.  It could well be that a Walker/Cruz ticket is the best we can do. 

Rubio and Ryan are dead to me. 
Paul is a possibility, as are Nikki Haley and Bobby Jindal.

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:25 AM (6TB1Z)

384 MENLO PARK, Calif. (AP) � You don't have to be just male or female on Facebook anymore. The social media giant is adding a customizable option with about 50 different terms people can use to identify their gender as well as three preferred pronoun choices: him, her or them. It.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:25 AM (ndIek)

385 Never wash your face with anything that looks remotely like a Sandra Flook urine drop.

Posted by: Bob Costass at February 13, 2014 09:25 AM (Dwehj)

386 Ted Cruz is the man who shot Liberty Valance.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 09:25 AM (XUKZU)

387 Ted Cruz made my high school girlfriend dump me before prom.

Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at February 13, 2014 09:26 AM (0LHZx)

388 Ted Cruz? Never heard of him.

Posted by: Charlie Gibson at February 13, 2014 09:26 AM (IXrOn)

389 Ted Cruz's nickname is "Bacon."

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at February 13, 2014 09:27 AM (0HooB)

390 Colorado Health-Exchange Director Indicted for Fraud, Theft ------------------- In many ways, this is the story of the Democratic Party.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:27 AM (aDwsi)

391 Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 01:23 PM (r+7wo)
-
I don't know,  I have trouble choosing one from column A and two from column B at a Chinese restaurant.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 09:27 AM (XUKZU)

392 191

Good to know I'm not the only one with 'those' kind of in-laws.  Mine are uber educated college profs and are oh so much smarter than the general populace.  I had the pleasure last weekend of bestowing some moron knowledge to the group. 

After sitting through what felt like hours of conservative and christian bashing, SIL said she would like to see what would happen if the Dems ran Rachel Maddow for president.  Much giggling over the conservative's head exploding because, you know,  Reps hate women and gays.

Did my best blonde shoulder pad head bobble and said I don't get it.  Isn't Maddow a man and isn't Obama our first gay president?

Gobsmack all around.  No one will ask me my opinion again.

Posted by: Usedtocould at February 13, 2014 09:27 AM (Q5wIZ)

393 I have an idea. Let's talk about ghey football.

Posted by: Bob Costass at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (Dwehj)

394 In many ways, this is the story of the Democratic Party. Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 01:27 PM (aDwsi) Got to say, I enjoy that meme. Good one.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (A98Xu)

395 Republicans will not rest until every Mexican who wants to work has an American job.

Posted by: whoever at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (kGSN0)

396 Well, he hasn't just been a Senator. From Wiki:

...Domestic Policy Advisor to U.S. President George W. Bush on the 2000 Bush-Cheney campaign.

OMG ESTABLISHMENT INSIDER BURN HIM AT THE STAKE

Posted by: Hollowpoint at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (SY2Kh)

397 Pep's point is valid. The problem, of course, is that few politicians these days have any experience in anything..., except politics. Three cheers for law school!

Posted by: AmishDude at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (T0NGe)

398
I might break my self-imposed non-voting on federal offices if a Cruz/Rand or Rand/Cruz candidacy came about.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (n0DEs)

399 Greg Gutfled said that Costas is advertising for Red Eye.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 01:13 PM (7ObY1)


Gutfield is hilarious. Costas is starting his own pandemic. He should leave Russia if anyone will let him board without a plastic bag on his head. I am sure he is thinking: OMG, all of these decades, lifetime, yapping at Olympics and I will be remembered for PINK EYE!!!


If he has staph resistant gomboo, he be in big heap of fubar as gross as it seemed in both eyes. I still wonder if he wore his contact lenses too long (if he wears them, as I make things up) and/or got a grody amoeba in eyes that is not responding and burrowing little holes into his brain.  Or, he simply picked his nose and then inserted finger into eye. If I had only not become a nurse I would think normal thoughts! Why did no one tell me of "women's studies" or "travel journalism" or "art history" when I contemplated college. Oh, no. After wanting to be a flight attendant on TWA or Pan Am, traveling the world and probably being kidnapped (oh, wait! Started college with Ted Bundy at UofU same month!)....but my Mama made me get two years of college first as I was too young. But, as usual, I digress due to hunger and my supermodel flavored cotton-ball diet (today: raspberry!).


I also imagine the pillows Costa slept on, oh, the pillows from residents for the shortage! egad. I have my own pillow phobia in really good American hotels. You can bet the house I would not lay my head on a Sochi pillow (I travel with my own, thank you). Cooties. Heaven knows what goes on in the beds, much less the pillows! I also throw my comforter/duvet thing on floor: first things first! I am a blast to travel with. A good friend, a Dem earthy type, went to Nepal. I told her I would need my own Sherpa just for my cosmetics and first aid kit.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (baL2B)

400 She was officially working there as Director, and also hired herself as a consultant, and hired her family members as consultants, and snagged a work laptop and said, "This thing here is mine too." Basically she was an idiot. Posted by: bonhomme at February 13, 2014 01:25 PM --------------------------------------------------------- So she went 5% further than your average bigwig bureaucrat.

Posted by: irright at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (8GKDa)

401 Ted Cruz coined the term "Fus Rah Do"

Posted by: grognard at February 13, 2014 09:28 AM (/29Nl)

402 My biggest problem with Cruz is lack of executive experience. ___________ This is stupid. Sorry, but it is. I don't give a fuck if someone has never run a lemondate stand. If he/she believes in what I believe, that's what matters. The president doesn't run things on his/her own. They have thousands of people in the administration that do the day to day things. What you need is someone who will give the right directives to his subordinates and the rest will take care of itself.

Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at February 13, 2014 09:29 AM (0LHZx)

403 Personally, I prefer "it" for alternate identities. Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 01:23 PM (r+7wo) Um, I think I meant *alternative*.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:29 AM (r+7wo)

404 I am sorry but you are either male or female. I don't care what the fucked up voices in your head are telling you about your gender identification, biology either gave you girl parts or boy parts. I am sick to fucking death of the cis gender trans gender, omg tolerate me because I am a fucked up snowflake or else movement.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlinSeattle at February 13, 2014 09:29 AM (RZ8pf)

405 It's like Cruz took a fucking oath to preserve the Constitution or something. 

Posted by: Thomas Jefferson at February 13, 2014 09:29 AM (ZMzpb)

406

350 Easy ... Ted and Chuck are a tag-team. After performing the Doomsday Device on Road Warrior Animal, they call out the Four Horsemen. Chuck puts Ric Flair in the Figure Four, while Ted does a spine-crusher on Arn Anderson AND a Top Rope Suplex on Tully Blanchard.

 

Lex Luger says screw this and quits the group. Barry Windham declines to join.

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 13, 2014 09:30 AM (VXk4i)

407 Why does Cruz hate Hispanics???

Posted by: --- at February 13, 2014 09:30 AM (MMC8r)

408 Al Roker is on Twitter, bitching about DeBlasio not closing schools. Someone responded with #ShartsFired.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 13, 2014 09:30 AM (SUKHu)

409 Speaking of phone lines:  I have always wondered, can I get a hold of congressional phone call volume records for certain days?

I recall calling a poop-ton of congressmen and senators right around the passage of Obamacare, and running into "mailbox is full" messages and the like.

I'd be very interested to see what the actual call volume was then. I suspect it's historic.

And I've never seen anyone follow up on it.

Posted by: Bob's House of Flannel Shirts and Wallet Chains at February 13, 2014 09:30 AM (vgIRn)

410 Good to know I'm not the only one with 'those' kind of in-laws. Mine are uber educated college profs and are oh so much smarter than the general populace. In what?

Posted by: AmishDude at February 13, 2014 09:30 AM (T0NGe)

411 Give me 10 divisions of Ted Cruzs' and our troubles here will end very quickly.

Posted by: Col. Kurtz at February 13, 2014 09:31 AM (v3O05)

412 I meant to leave this sock on so I could post something funny about identifying as "Rooster" on Facebook.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 13, 2014 09:31 AM (SUKHu)

413 Christy - Not just cooties, Russian cooties. Some of those little bastards have been around Stalingrad, and are still pissed off.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at February 13, 2014 09:31 AM (aDwsi)

414 So she went 5% further than your average bigwig bureaucrat. Yes. I think if it weren't for being a Full-Time Employee AND Consultant at the same time, she'd be fine.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:32 AM (9PrpA)

415 410

English Lit and Creative Writing.  Yep.  I'm sure poli-sci and economics are involved in both of those fields.

Posted by: Usedtocould at February 13, 2014 09:32 AM (Q5wIZ)

416 Ted Cruz? Never heard of him. Posted by: Charlie Gibson>>

Don't cross the Memes

Posted by: Ghost Busters at February 13, 2014 09:32 AM (tf9Ne)

417 Holy shit.  b/c I am a giver

http://www.foxnews.com/ entertainment/2014/02/13/ kate-mara-strips-down-talks-house-cards-season-2/

take out the spaces

Posted by: grognard at February 13, 2014 09:33 AM (/29Nl)

418 408 Al Roker is on Twitter, bitching about DeBlasio not closing schools.

Someone responded with #ShartsFired.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 13, 2014 01:30 PM (SUKHu)

lol

Posted by: Barack Obama at February 13, 2014 09:33 AM (Kkt/i)

419
   Even given the disinclination of this admin to follow the law, I  believe that if enough screaming was done about the aforementioned enforcement, you could force at least a partial solution.

   THAT I conclude, would open the floodgate.

   Like give these spineless twerks enough impetus to do their job, if only to ensure reelection.

Posted by: irongrampa at February 13, 2014 09:33 AM (SAMxH)

420 Unpossibly difficult don't have the votes conserving our ammo nation of immigrants bipartisan solution not the hill to die on minority party Tea Party extremists jobs Americans won't do wait til November...

We're Number Two!
We're Number Two!
We're Number Two!

Posted by: Fightin' John Boehner and Mighty Mitch McConnell [/i] [/b] at February 13, 2014 09:33 AM (5ikDv)

421 Posted by: ParanoidGirlinSeattle at February 13, 2014 01:29 PM (RZ8pf) When the world was saner, we recognized this as a clear psychological disorder. Now we're supposed to embrace it as just another valid choice. Remember all the jokes about the guy who went to the doctor cos he thought he was a dog? Yeah, same thing. And there are people out there who feel they should have their limbs amputated. We don't go around celebrating them. What's the difference between that and a choppadickoffamy? I denounce myself, even more vehemently this time.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at February 13, 2014 09:33 AM (r+7wo)

422 We do it in your eyes.

Posted by: russian cooties at February 13, 2014 09:33 AM (8GKDa)

423

Our best fighters appear to be Gowdy and Cruz. A dynamic duo. These two guys can change the country if elected to the right offices.

 

Er, you might want to check this with regard to Gowdy and amnesty.  Granted, it's Pollutico, but Trey wouldn't admit he was trying to do anything good.

 

http://politi.co/1dL8UVC

Posted by: RushBabe at February 13, 2014 09:34 AM (hrIP5)

424 I am changing my Facebook gender ID to: He who walks behind the rows

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:34 AM (7ObY1)

425 I'm already sad next football season will be all about the gay.

Posted by: Seems legit at February 13, 2014 09:35 AM (A98Xu)

426 I am sick to fucking death of the cis gender trans gender, omg tolerate me because I am a fucked up snowflake or else movement. Yeah, without looking it up, I'd be very confused if someone called me cis-gender. Um, no, I'm a guy. My parts say guy, my brain says guy, I'm a guy. At least hetero-normative is self-explanatory without having to think back on my Chemistry classes.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:35 AM (9PrpA)

427 "Yakov Smirnoff" was just a Ted Cruz plot to make the USSR look bad. I mean, think about it.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:35 AM (7ObY1)

428 This is stupid. Sorry, but it is. ... What you need is someone who will give the right directives to his subordinates and the rest will take care of itself.

You mean like Obamacare or the stimulus? 

Self-awareness isn't your strong suit, is it?

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:36 AM (6TB1Z)

429 Even given the disinclination of this admin to follow the law, I believe that if enough screaming was done about the aforementioned enforcement, you could force at least a partial solution.

Good luck getting 60 votes for it, gramps.

Posted by: Harry Reid at February 13, 2014 09:36 AM (SY2Kh)

430 English Lit and Creative Writing. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA You should point out that English is their native language. So good job with that tough curriculum. I've practiced the derisive snort and can display it the moment I hear the name of a wussy field. It's awesome. Seriously? These people know what a physicist or computer scientist or, God forbid, a mathematician is and they think THEY'RE smart? *snk*

Posted by: AmishDude at February 13, 2014 09:36 AM (T0NGe)

431 Ted Cruz? Yeah, I've heard of him.

Posted by: Charlie Gibson at February 13, 2014 09:36 AM (Kkt/i)

432 So ... Um ... *cough*

Anyone got any good fishing stories?

Posted by: weft cut-loop[/i] [/b] at February 13, 2014 09:36 AM (cxs6V)

433 Is Lesbian Trapped in Man's Body a valid choice ?

Posted by: ScoggDog at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (VXk4i)

434

#shartsfired

Ha!

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Ready to get Liquored Up at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (K+mtQ)

435 So, did our favorite Ewok call in today or does someone need to go chisel him out of that dried pool of Valu-Rite and pudding?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (0HooB)

436 Who else? Let's start with Republican governors. There are a lot of them. Rick Perry (yeah, I know, but I bet he's a better candidate when he isn't on drugs) Bobby Jindal (seriously? that response was AGES ago.) Nikki Haley. (war on women, anyone? bring it. if she can beat the good ole boys in SC...) Scott Walker (beat the unions - in WISCONSIN) Mike Pence (he's got awesome hair!) Jan Brewer (finger in TFG's face!) Rick Snyder (a Republican winning in MICHIGAN) Chris Christie (I know I know I know. But, honestly, him or Hillary? Pick now. But careful - it matters. ) And that is just some of the current crop, plus some previous governors.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (4+AaH)

437 @407 Why does Cruz hate Hispanics??? Ted Cruz doesn't hate Hispanics, Ted Cruz hates Americans. I mean, without Hispanics doing the jobs Americans won't do, it means Americans will have to do the crummy jobs.

Posted by: Blake at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (HBuxY)

438 I'm already sad next football season will be all about the gay. To be fair, the pink month will be faaaaaaabulous!

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (ndIek)

439 Did my best blonde shoulder pad head bobble and said I don't get it. Isn't Maddow a man and isn't Obama our first gay president?

Gobsmack all around. No one will ask me my opinion again.

Posted by: Usedtocould at February 13, 2014 01:27 PM (Q5wIZ)


Ha! My family knows when I start drawling like Jean Smart on Designing Women that all hail is fixin' to break loose, as I don't normally talk so Southern Belle. Every now and then my husband will chime in with a zinger with his family, but he mostly feels you can't fix stupid. I can go most of the entire trip without fighting back, but sometimes the gin has not reached the levels I need, and, whammo, ChristyGoesBerserk.


I would love for Rachel Madcow to run. It would make me laugh, not fear. I love your comment about first geh preznit.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:37 AM (baL2B)

440 Even given the disinclination of this admin to follow the law, I believe that if enough screaming was done about the aforementioned enforcement, you could force at least a partial solution.
-
I see the FCC is backing off their recently announced witch hunt so maybe screaming does have an effect.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 09:38 AM (XUKZU)

441 So...anyone planning on making a movie about Ted Cruz? Just asking.

Posted by: Brian D. at February 13, 2014 09:38 AM (SUKHu)

442 AmishDude to the barrel for embiggening the blog.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:38 AM (9PrpA)

443 Yeah, Cruz ignored the talking points where "puppies" was supposed to replace the word "amnesty".

Posted by: Yancey Ward at February 13, 2014 09:38 AM (RGR0F)

444 I'm already sad next football season will be all about the gay.

Posted by: Seems legit

You think the pink ribbons was just coincidence?

Posted by: weft cut-loop[/i] [/b] at February 13, 2014 09:39 AM (cxs6V)

445 The chattering self-appointed elites are about as bright as Bizzaro.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 13, 2014 09:39 AM (+lpuZ)

446 And that is just some of the current crop, plus some previous governors. How about NM Governor Susanna Martinez (in the Veep slot). Having her on the ticket beats two memes at once.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:39 AM (7ObY1)

447 Who else? Let's start with Republican governors. There are a lot of them. Rick Perry (yeah, I know, but I bet he's a better candidate when he isn't on drugs) Aren't we all?

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:39 AM (ndIek)

448 I am changing my Facebook gender ID to:

I like big butts and I cannot lie.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 13, 2014 09:39 AM (XUKZU)

449 436 Who else? Let's start with Republican governors. There are a lot of them.

Rick Perry (yeah, I know, but I bet he's a better candidate when he isn't on drugs)
Bobby Jindal (seriously? that response was AGES ago.)
Nikki Haley. (war on women, anyone? bring it. if she can beat the good ole boys in SC...)
Scott Walker (beat the unions - in WISCONSIN)
Mike Pence (he's got awesome hair!)
Jan Brewer (finger in TFG's face!)
Rick Snyder (a Republican winning in MICHIGAN)
Chris Christie (I know I know I know. But, honestly, him or Hillary? Pick now. But careful - it matters. )

And that is just some of the current crop, plus some previous governors.

Posted by: blaster at February 13, 2014 01:37 PM (4+AaH)


That New Mexico governor is well-spoken (Susana Martinez). This is from the few brain cells left since November 2012. I liked her speech at the convention. She could be pro-open borders, I do not know.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:40 AM (baL2B)

450 I do not see "cthulhu" as a FB gender ID option. Haterz.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:40 AM (7ObY1)

451 "Wow what a hit! You really gotta wonder though , Joe, was he focussing on the play or on the possibility of dorking the running back in the squeakhole?"

"Yep he definitely drilled his ass, Bob. So to speak...er..."

Posted by: Future 2014 NFL color commentary at February 13, 2014 09:41 AM (5ikDv)

452 I think we should just remove any literature from libraries/kindles and bookstores. The only legitimate majors are maths and hard sciences and anyone who writes literature or teaches about that should be put in concentration camps. We'll have a Conservative Central Committee that decides what is legitimately appropriate to study, write and teach/ sarc. Yes, I know most people teaching in Universities are leftists (and that would include people IN the sciences and maths) and that majors in the arts/literature don't lead to jobs but I resist the idea than anyone that doesn't teach maths and sciences is only worthy of scorn and derision.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 13, 2014 09:41 AM (XyM/Y)

453 Nood

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 09:41 AM (ndIek)

454 You think the pink ribbons was just coincidence? I thought it was about tits!

Posted by: Most NFL Players[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 13, 2014 09:41 AM (9PrpA)

455 I've practiced the derisive snort and can display it the moment I hear the name of a wussy field. It's awesome.

Now Witness the power of this fully armed and operational derisive snort!

Posted by: pep at February 13, 2014 09:42 AM (6TB1Z)

456 Ace is awake, y'all.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at February 13, 2014 09:42 AM (0HooB)

457 Did my best blonde shoulder pad head bobble and said I don't get it. Isn't Maddow a man and isn't Obama our first gay president?

I'd kind of like this "first gay president" thing to get some traction, just because it's so much fun to watch proggies defend him against it, as if his being gay somehow diminishes him.  Hee-hee.

Posted by: HR at February 13, 2014 09:43 AM (ZKzrr)

458 441. Sounds like they did.  Man of Steel Balls

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at February 13, 2014 09:43 AM (R5UOB)

459 "That New Mexico governor is well-spoken (Susana Martinez). This is from the few brain cells left since November 2012. I liked her speech at the convention. She could be pro-open borders, I do not know." If you thought the liberals went crazy destroying a woman with Sarah Palin, just imagine what they would do if we ran a Hispanic woman. There would be no limit to the carnage.

Posted by: jwest at February 13, 2014 09:43 AM (u2a4R)

460 "And he's prancing over the fifty-yard line. Now he's flouncing over to the sideline. Uh-oh, looks like penalty on the play. Yes, the referee is indeed signalling for an Unfabulous Conduct penalty. Seems the linebacker's pink shoes clash with his green eyeliner. That'll be 10 yards and a smack on the butt from the opposing QB."

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:44 AM (7ObY1)

461 Also, for the record, I hate javascript.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at February 13, 2014 09:44 AM (PYAXX)

462 Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 13, 2014 01:41 PM (XyM/Y) I tutor kids in Lit and writing classes. Do I have to be unpersoned now?

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 13, 2014 09:45 AM (7ObY1)

463 Ask Amish Dude

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 13, 2014 09:47 AM (XyM/Y)

464 Ted Cruz freed Mumia. It was so frightening, he shit himself and begged to be returned to prison.

Posted by: Harrison Bergeron at February 13, 2014 09:47 AM (qNZ3I)

465 We really have to get rid of those voters and find some reasonable ones

Posted by: The RNC at February 13, 2014 09:48 AM (aTXUx)

466 In fact, one of the first tasks of the Conservative Central Committee will be to dig up the moldering bones of Shakespeare, Jane Austen and Eudora Welty and hang them in a little bag from a gibbet at a cross roads. ;^)

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 13, 2014 09:51 AM (XyM/Y)

467 438 I'm already sad next football season will be all about the gay.


To be fair, the pink month will be faaaaaaabulous!

Posted by: rickb223 at February 13, 2014 01:37 PM (ndIek)


I am sick of gay people demanding their crap. Just get on with it, y'all. Be gay. Be whatever you can be, like Barney and Mr. Rogers used to say:straight, gay, transgender, polygamist, purple people eater. No one cares! It is not shocking and is mainstream now and boring. Just be quiet about it and don't do it in the street and scare the horses. I say that, but it is disgusting there is a gay day in Disney. Children should not have to have this explained to them in freaking kindergarten why people have two mommies and/or two daddies or Chaz Bono! Let them believe in Santa and that babies come out navels or under a cabbage leaf. That is my main complaint of "diversity." What about us boring peoples? Where is my day? My parade? My color ribbon?


I am sick of gay crap in the Olympics and super, mega, sick of it being a topic in church. Just be gay and shut the hell up. I don't like to see heteros kissing with tongues in front of me or pawing down pants, so, of course, I sure as heck don't like Fulton Street. Take it inside. Leave footbawl alone (actually I think they will take care of this on their own, boyz). Gay bobsledders, whatever. Get over yourselves. Get married, but just not in church, have babies via surrogates, and pretend this is all normal. No one cares anymore! You win! /rant over

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:53 AM (baL2B)

468 1) Good on him. 2) Still don't want any young senator as preezy.

Posted by: HoboJerky, Hash Hunter at February 13, 2014 09:55 AM (E8IHS)

469 Let me amend that. Majors in the arts,. literature and writing don't always lead to jobs in those fields, but of course they do lead to jobs that require good writing and communication skills.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at February 13, 2014 09:55 AM (XyM/Y)

470
Someone responded with #ShartsFired.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 13, 2014 01:30 PM (SUKHu)
lol

Posted by: Barack Obama at February 13, 2014 01:33 PM (Kkt/i)


I love it!

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Duchess of Something at February 13, 2014 09:57 AM (baL2B)

471

Thsnks, flounder, for the link. Have posted Monty's original and Ace's follow up for ongoing reflection.

 

Ooops, now I need to figure out how to delete all this. I heard suspicious static noises on my phone a minute ago.

 

Oh well, when they come for me, they will likely be coming for everyone on AoS. And Ace, Monty, LauraW and all the other cobs will already be heading for Room 101.

 

We will meet in the place where there is no darkness, comrades.

 

 

Posted by: RM at February 13, 2014 10:02 AM (HWE+X)

472 11" of Climate Change today ... so far

Posted by: Islamic Rage Boy at February 13, 2014 11:43 AM (e8kgV)

473 Man if you read most of the comments after the article, they hate Sen Ted Cruz. It's a sorry state we have so many who support breaking the law, stealing identities. And now criminal holder wants to make sure all the dems in the prison get to vote for them. Yes, they are changing the country alright.

Posted by: Toronto Gal at February 13, 2014 12:48 PM (5cS5I)

474 I like how you stomped Drew M. He deserved it.

Posted by: Tattoo De Plane at February 13, 2014 03:05 PM (Y92Nd)

475 Isn't nice that your congressman thinks you are dummer than a box of rocks?  The American people only figured out it was amnesty because of Senator Cruz told them so. Other than that, we can get away with anything because Americans are really, really STUPID. 

Posted by: burt at February 14, 2014 05:52 AM (1+kJ5)

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