April 24, 2014

Man Reveals Secret of Success: Do Nothing But Drink, Party, and Bicep Curls, Then Get Into a Pointless Barfight Where You're Conked on the Head From Behind, and You Too May Become a Mathematical Intuitive Genius
— Ace

So, supposedly, this guy is one of only 40 -- forty! -- people in the entire world with "acquired savant syndrome," in which one suddenly gains a savant-like effortless, innate skill at art, math, or science after an brain injury or brain disease.

He became a mathematical savant -- after previously showing no talent or interest in any higher-thinking pursuit -- after suffering a "profound concussion" in a barfight.

“If it could happen to me, it could happen to anyone," he says in his new book, thus promising readers a surefire pathway to success -- careless living and drunken brawls.

So guys, go out there, get a load on, start throwing elbows and ethnic slurs, and maybe change the world.

And bring your protractor and compass -- you might need them later.


PadgettÂ’s world is bursting with mathematical patterns. He is one of a few people in the world who can draw approximations of fractals, the repeating geometric patterns that are building blocks of everything in the known universe, by hand. Tree leaves outside his window are evidence of PythagorasÂ’ theorem. The arc that light makes when it bounces off his car proves the power of pi.

He sees the parts that make up the whole. And his world is never boring, never without amazement. Even his dreams are made up of geometry.

...

Flash back 12 years: Padgett had dropped out of Tacoma (Wash.) Community College, and was a self-described “goof” with zero interest in academics, let alone math. The only time he dealt in numbers was to track the hours until his shift ended at his father’s furniture store, tally up his bar tab, or count bicep curls at the gym.
With his mullet, leather vest open to a bare chest, and skintight pants, he was more like a high-school student stuck in the 1980s — even though it was 2002, and he was a 31-year-old with a daughter.

He would race his buddies in a freshly painted red Camaro. His life was one adrenaline rush after another: cliff-jumping, sky-diving, bar-hopping. He was the “life of the party.” The guy who would funnel a beer before going out and would slip a bottle of Southern Comfort in his jacket pocket to avoid paying $6 for mixed drinks.

...

Party time came to end the night of Friday, Sept. 13, 2002, at a karaoke bar near his home. There, two men attacked him from behind, punching him in the back of the head, knocking him unconscious.

...

The next morning, while running the water in the bathroom, he noticed “lines emanating out perpendicularly from the flow. At first, I was startled, and worried for myself, but it was so beautiful that I just stood in my slippers and stared.”

...

Days went by, but the visuals remained.

...

During one of his meditations, he came to the conclusion that “circles don’t exist.”

“It was like a bomb went off in my mind. In a matter of minutes, I was no longer just a receiver of geometric imagery or a researcher; I was a theorist,” he writes.

It's pretty neat, and while I've excerpted quite a bit, there's more of his story -- essentially a superhero story, when you think about it, as he acquires Strange New Powers without any satisfying rational explanation for it -- at the link.

You should know that he wasn't entirely unprepared for sudden genius. He had always scored high on IQ tests, though he never had any interest in academics or doing much besides getting his liquor on and getting his weenie squeezed.

So, you know: A hero for us all.

When they make the movie, "Circles don't exist, baby," will be his pick-up line.

Posted by: Ace at 10:17 AM | Comments (431)
Post contains 693 words, total size 4 kb.

1 I'm on board for everything but the bicep curl.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 24, 2014 10:19 AM (8ZskC)

2 m'kay Ace you hold Average Joe and I'll get the sledgehammer

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:20 AM (TE35l)

3 Meh. We did this story on a Gilligan's Island episode.

Posted by: Sherwood Schwartz at April 24, 2014 10:20 AM (8ZskC)

4 Hold my beer...

Posted by: brak at April 24, 2014 10:20 AM (iEoiA)

5 Common Core Avenger!

Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:22 AM (GQ8sn)

6 When I left Seattle at 22, I never missed the rain, and I never missed the abundant amount of scruffy low-life men.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 24, 2014 10:22 AM (6H6o8)

7 5 Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:22 PM (GQ8sn)

Billy, bite this apple and face the board....

//Teacher with a ballbat

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:23 AM (TE35l)

8 I think we're all underestimating the importance of the mullet in this story. It cannot be unimportant that this happened to a man who still sported a mullet in 2002.

Posted by: Jenny Hates Her Phone at April 24, 2014 10:23 AM (QzEdR)

9 I can see oxygen, or air or whatever.

Posted by: Joe Biden at April 24, 2014 10:23 AM (8ZskC)

10 He had always scored high on IQ tests, though he never had any interest in academics or doing much besides getting his liquor on and getting his weenie squeezed.




Some of us call that Tuesdays.



Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:23 AM (GQ8sn)

11 Einstein wore what's called an "Austrian Mullet."

Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 10:24 AM (/FnUH)

12 The man's got Moron written all over him.

Posted by: Andy at April 24, 2014 10:24 AM (2OaXr)

13 How can you tell he isn't just a regular idiot?

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:24 AM (LJ7Ze)

14 My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.

Posted by: Hedley Lamarr at April 24, 2014 10:24 AM (8ZskC)

15 >> Einstein wore what's called an "Austrian Mullet." You know who else wore an Austrian Mullet ...

Posted by: Andy at April 24, 2014 10:24 AM (2OaXr)

16 I'm not just saying that because my genius/idiot brother still has a mullet, and I'd like a reason to smack him in the head. For science.

Posted by: Jenny Hates Her Phone at April 24, 2014 10:25 AM (QzEdR)

17 Pffft....big deal.



I was having mindthoughts and soulpatterns long before this douche.

Posted by: Scott Beauchamp at April 24, 2014 10:25 AM (GQ8sn)

18 14 My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives. --- Ditto

Posted by: Taggart at April 24, 2014 10:25 AM (APuJ7)

19 15 Posted by: Andy at April 24, 2014 02:24 PM (2OaXr)

yeah but Albert's was on his head not his crank like the other guys'...


Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:25 AM (TE35l)

20 Sorry for the too early O/T. But I had to send Rush an email that David Harsanyi isn't surprised that libs and the media (BIRM) are commies. I get frustrated with the fact that he isn't familiar with a lot of the good conservative bloggers and out there and just has his list of establishment (not in the sense of GOPe) blogs. He really needs to expand his blog reading.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at April 24, 2014 10:25 AM (r+7wo)

21 The next morning, while running the water in the bathroom, he noticed “lines emanating out perpendicularly from the flow. At first, I was startled, and worried for myself, but it was so beautiful that I just stood in my slippers and stared.” Sounds more like he's got clonked on the head and became autistic

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 10:26 AM (XyM/Y)

22 The next morning, while running the water in the bathroom, he noticed “lines emanating out perpendicularly from the flow. At first, I was startled, and worried for myself, but it was so beautiful that I just stood in my slippers and stared.”

I call those flashbacks.

Posted by: Marmo at April 24, 2014 10:26 AM (QW+AD)

23 >>>How can you tell he isn't just a regular idiot? I was wondering about that.

Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 10:26 AM (/FnUH)

24 He really needs to expand his blog reading.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at April 24, 2014 02:25 PM (r+7wo)



Or he could just come here.



Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:26 AM (GQ8sn)

25

He could have just as easily damaged his hypothalmus, resulting in erectile dysfunction.

 

Just understand the risks, is all I am saying.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 24, 2014 10:26 AM (sBUAE)

26 B.S.  The guy "scored high" on I.Q. tests, so he was already prepped for genius. Maybe it was because he was sober for once....

Posted by: JoeyBagels at April 24, 2014 10:26 AM (lqmo/)

27
**smashes paper against window

"Well ..... Ah got her numbah......  howdooyoo like dem apples!!!"

Posted by: fixerupper at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (nELVU)

28 This did not work for me.

Posted by: navybrat at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (JgC5a)

29 So there should be more math on this blog.

Posted by: rickl at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (zoehZ)

30 These brain enhancing techniques don't work consistently . Years ago in Cincinnati Ohio ,a guy who could have been Obamas son , only much larger ,threw a quart bottle of Wild Irish Rose at me from about 10 feet away. Hit me right on the back of the coconut and shattered into glorious pink spray . All I got was a fuckin' headache .

Posted by: awkward davies at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (whqez)

31 I can boink you on the head, Ace? You want me to do it?

Posted by: Sir Pug A Lott at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (8c12T)

32 The key to this guy's transformation was the Valu-Rite bottle he was struck with. It is known to impart wisdom.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (0HooB)

33 I call bullshit.

Posted by: Pythagoras at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (8ZskC)

34 32 The key to this guy's transformation was the Valu-Rite bottle he was struck with. It is known to impart wisdom. --- Maybe he got hit with the Almighty Clue Bat.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at April 24, 2014 10:27 AM (APuJ7)

35 Talk about having some sense knocked into you...

Posted by: JoeyBagels at April 24, 2014 10:28 AM (lqmo/)

36 24 Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:26 PM (GQ8sn)

He or one of his collation workers DO come here on occasion...

we've caught meme gen almost real time like during Antknee Wienah gate

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:28 AM (TE35l)

37 Sounds more like he got clonked on the head and became autistic. ----- Someone snuck an MMR vaccine to him in the ER.

Posted by: Jenny MMcCarthy at April 24, 2014 10:28 AM (QzEdR)

38 Flowers for Algernon.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:28 AM (LJ7Ze)

39 "If it could happen to me, it could happen to anyone," he says in his new book, thus promising readers a surefire pathway to success -- careless living and drunken brawls. Along with brain aneuryrisms, uncontrollable drooling, ......

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 10:28 AM (uVkIH)

40 he approximated the area of a circle by drawing 270 teeny-tiny pie-slice triangles within it. He knew the formula (I guess) for area of a triangle, and so he could use that to figure the area of the circle (approximately), and so approximate pi. I'm not sure that's really "genius" though. I mean, it's certainly a way to do it. All calculus courses begin with the "area under the curve" problem and the approximation of it by drawing a series of ever-thinner rectangles under the curve. But I don't see how it's "genius." Especially because you learn that trick the first day of calc.

Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 10:29 AM (/FnUH)

41 The same thing must've happened to Georrge Marrtin. He is an literary imaginative idiot savant. His stories have no beginning or end, just middles. Endless middles.

Posted by: Soothie § at April 24, 2014 10:29 AM (vT9IG)

42 I bet if I took a handful of LSD, I could see the fractals and emanating lines and squishy weird things, too.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 24, 2014 10:30 AM (6H6o8)

43 I hit my head on a gravel road so hard once I got amnesia. No super powers though.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:30 AM (LJ7Ze)

44 30 Posted by: awkward davies at April 24, 2014 02:27 PM (whqez)

AD in honor of Obama's Son # 376,421

http://youtu.be/o3-MrFOLXFs

Cincinnati Police 11/30/03

My momma taught me dis...

Mayhem at the White Castle

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:30 AM (TE35l)

45
Fuckers ALWAYS stealing my movie roles.....

Posted by: John Travolta at April 24, 2014 10:30 AM (nELVU)

46 Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 02:29 PM (/FnUH) pi*r^2 is one way to do it. I guess he really didn't pay attention in school.

Posted by: chique d'afrique (the artist formerly known as african chick) at April 24, 2014 10:30 AM (r+7wo)

47 thus promising readers a surefire pathway to success -- careless living and drunken brawls. So guys, go out there, get a load on, start throwing elbows and ethnic slurs, and maybe change the world. ___ I'm failing to see the problem.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:31 AM (x3YFz)

48 I guess it's more of an illustration of his sudden interest in geometry and his desire to explore it, even without knowing more sophisticated techniques.

Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 10:31 AM (/FnUH)

49 If real life were a crime show, his acquired savantism would just be a ruse to get the thugs who beat him up to come forward and collect their reward. I'd totally watch that show. It should star Joaquin Phoenix.

Posted by: Jenny Hates Her Phone at April 24, 2014 10:31 AM (QzEdR)

50 I hit my head on a gravel road so hard once I got amnesia. No super powers though. Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 02:30 PM (LJ7Ze) ...that you have discovered, yet. Keep at it!

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (x3YFz)

51 If you ever get a concussion and lose your memory, go get another one to get it back. I learned that from every sitcom.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (bxKJf)

52 Common Core 2.0
Boot to the head for all!!

( ... and another for Jenny and the wimp )

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (ujux6)

53 Bonk Bonk on the headÂ… good kid?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (CMkNk)

54 49 Posted by: Jenny Hates Her Phone at April 24, 2014 02:31 PM (QzEdR)

or Zombie River

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (TE35l)

55 *Ponders opening up an "Acquired Savant Syndrome" booth at NYCComicon, where lefty comic book geeks pay get bashed them on the head in the offchance they acquire super mental powers*

Posted by: LizLem at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (yRwC8)

56 So this guy has epiphanies when he stares at water, like a moron stares at boobs?



Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:32 AM (GQ8sn)

57 Here is one of those things he says doesn't exist:


O



Now if he was arguing that ampersands don't exist......

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (sjdRT)

58 In many ways, this is the story of every AoS commenter.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (x3YFz)

59 My oldest cousin suffered seizures as an adolescent.....one day he and his younger brother got into a fight and the younger brother punched him in the head.....hard enough to break his hand....and the older brother's seizures ended.

Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (j7iSn)

60 That's pretty impressive and everything, but let's see him plop an egg out of his vagina.

Posted by: Milo Moire at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (8ZskC)

61 I saw Acquired Savant Syndrome open for the Alan Parsons   Project at Burning Man, 1988

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (sBUAE)

62 57 Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 02:33 PM (sjdRT) 0 does so exist, because Islamophobia!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (CMkNk)

63 His stories have beginning or end, just middles. Endless middles. ---- If we could only perfect the novel-to-Oreo conversion process...

Posted by: Jenny Hates Her Phone at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (QzEdR)

64 61 I saw Acquired Savant Syndrome open for the Alan Parsons Project at Burning Man, 1988 --- APP, why so Sirius?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (APuJ7)

65 58 Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 02:33 PM (x3YFz)

it also explains Val Jar's PR-24 she carries everywhere

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:33 AM (TE35l)

66 The mind is a very strange thing. This is actually interesting versus worrying about girls allowances and stuff.

Posted by: Chaos the Other Dark Meat at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (oDCMR)

67 >>>My oldest cousin suffered seizures as an adolescent.....one day he and his younger brother got into a fight and the younger brother punched him in the head.....hard enough to break his hand....and the older brother's seizures ended. that's what we were always trying to do, knock some sense into our brothers.

Posted by: Union of Older Brothers at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (/FnUH)

68 Heh. Do a search for "head injury" and "guitar." There are a lot of people who became awesome musicians after getting boinked on the noggin.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (0HooB)

69 Oh wow that sentence came out all wrong there... should be "where lefty comic book geeks pay to get bashed on the head in the offchance they acquire super mental powers"

Posted by: LizLem at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (yRwC8)

70 he approximated the area of a circle by drawing 270 teeny-tiny pie-slice triangles within it. He knew the formula (I guess) for area of a triangle, and so he could use that to figure the area of the circle (approximately), and so approximate pi.

I'm not sure that's really "genius" though. I mean, it's certainly a way to do it.

All calculus courses begin with the "area under the curve" problem and the approximation of it by drawing a series of ever-thinner rectangles under the curve.

But I don't see how it's "genius." Especially because you learn that trick the first day of calc.



Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 02:29 PM (/FnUH)




I think he ripped that off from a mathematician.  I heard the "triangles" bit inside a circle before.

Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (GQ8sn)

71 punched him in the head.....hard enough to break his hand....and the older brother's seizures ended. Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 02:33 PM (j7iSn) FIXED!

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (x3YFz)

72 59 Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 02:33 PM (j7iSn)


of course so did his breathing...

//Grim Reaper on Open Mic night at the comedy barn

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:34 AM (TE35l)

73 Oops, up-side the head, I said oops upside the headÂ…

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:35 AM (CMkNk)

74 A lot of womens turn wild after a head trauma.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:35 AM (LJ7Ze)

75 68 Heh. Do a search for "head injury" and "guitar." There are a lot of people who became awesome musicians after getting boinked on the noggin --- There's also the opposite, like Krist Novosec bonking himself in the head with a guitar live on MTV. Since Nirvana dissolved after Cobain's death, he's become a politician.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at April 24, 2014 10:35 AM (APuJ7)

76

Well, shit.  If this were true, I'd be president by now.

 

Oh, wait....I forgot smart is not a qualification for president any more.

 

Then, I'd be Sec of state

 

Shit.

Posted by: FITP at April 24, 2014 10:35 AM (sqslj)

77 Women have acquired savant syndrome 42% less often then men, because Patriarchy,

Posted by: The MSM, Now With 20% More Truthiness at April 24, 2014 10:35 AM (8ZskC)

78 Smack Gabe in the head hard enough and he becomes Todd Akin.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:35 AM (CMkNk)

79 78 Smack Gabe in the head hard enough and he becomes Todd Akin. --- Do we keep going until he becomes Joe Biden?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at April 24, 2014 10:36 AM (APuJ7)

80 Like sand through the hourglass, so are the Morons staring at boobs. I am ashamed Horde, no discussion of what super powers one would like to acquire through scientifically applied head bashing? I, for one, look forward to my ability to Scanners people through the internet. Annnnd go!

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 10:36 AM (mf5HN)

81 But I don't see how it's "genius." Especially because you learn that trick the first day of calc. Posted by: ace at April 24, 2014 02:29 PM (/FnUH) I think he ripped that off from a mathematician. I heard the "triangles" bit inside a circle before. Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:34 PM (GQ8sn) Newton was stoned silly when he developed calculus. Food for thought.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:36 AM (x3YFz)

82 74 A lot of womens turn wild after a head trauma. Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 02:35 PM (LJ7Ze) Remove the word "trauma" from that sentence and you got it right.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:36 AM (CMkNk)

83

But I don't see how it's "genius." Especially because you learn that trick the first day of calc.

 

I am a true idiot.  In B-school they made the liberal arts refugees take calc.  I had no idea what I was doing.  Just brute force through the formulas, first derivative, second derivative...

 

It was when I was actually taking the final that I looked down and said, "oh, I get it.  This is the area under the curve and that's the tangent!"

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at April 24, 2014 10:36 AM (JtwS4)

84 He also acquired agoraphobia and is germ-phobic as well. What a trade-off.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 24, 2014 10:36 AM (6H6o8)

85 I, for one, look forward to my ability to Scanners people through the internet.



That was the plot of the third one, where the evil girl could do it over tv.


Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:37 AM (GQ8sn)

86 I volunteer for the punch John Kerrey in the face until he becomes smart project.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:37 AM (x3YFz)

87 I think he ripped that off from a mathematician. I heard the "triangles" bit inside a circle before.

Posted by: EC

Me too.

Posted by: Archimedes at April 24, 2014 10:37 AM (ujux6)

88 There's also the opposite, like Krist Novosec bonking himself in the head with a guitar live on MTV. Since Nirvana dissolved after Cobain's death, he's become a politician. Coincidence or job requirement?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (0HooB)

89 Did EC just call the Empress evil?

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (sjdRT)

90

Remember when Hillary "couldn't testify at Bengahzi because..... concussion?"


Im thinking this is a "ride along" to that......

Posted by: fixerupper at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (nELVU)

91 Newton was stoned silly when he developed calculus. Food for thought.



The only way it could ever have been done!


Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (GQ8sn)

92

Getting his weenie squeezed?  Someone's a poet.

 

OT:  Are any of the horde following the hilarious fight between George Clooney and Steve Wynn that happened in Las Vegas?

 

Clooney was in Vegas to promote some tequila he is going to try and hawk. He was sitting at a table with Wynn, and some other executives when they started talking politics - ruh roh.  Wynn called Obama an asshole and Clooney got pissed saying that Obama was his "long time friend" and ended up storming out of the event.

 

Anyway Wynn later told the LV media that Clooney was drunk and lost control.  Wynn said that Clooney's a great guy when he's sober but when he starts to drink you want to arrive late and leave early.

 

All I can think of is Clooney crying "Leave my boyfriend alone!".  Clooney stated that no matter what the politics, the office of the President should be respected.  He was defending GWB this way wasn't he????

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (G+Wff)

93 Me too. Posted by: Archimedes at April 24, 2014 02:37 PM (ujux6) Oh, go get screwed.

Posted by: Eratosthenes at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (8ZskC)

94

A lot of womens turn wild after a head trauma.

 

--

 

This would explain why cavemen used the club technique.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (sBUAE)

95 87 Posted by: Archimedes at April 24, 2014 02:37 PM (ujux6)

Isosceles PUT THE FUCKING MACE DOWN!

//Archimedes

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:38 AM (TE35l)

96 I didn't get past pre calc. Never once used matrixes in real life.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (LJ7Ze)

97 I think he ripped that off from a mathematician. I heard the "triangles" bit inside a circle before. Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:34 PM (GQ8sn) The basic integration setup model for a circular coordinate system using (r, θ vice (x,y).

Posted by: Hrothgar [/i][/s][/b] at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (o3MSL)

98 Annnnd go! Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 02:36 PM (mf5HN) Ability to breathe underwater and speak with sea-creatures!

Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (C/o9W)

99 Fall into a well, eyes go crossed. Get kicked in the head by a mule, eyes go straight again. It was a real miracle.

Posted by: Cousin Eddie at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (gOoFi)

100 Somehow, I just got the picture of Uncle Fester with the giant Jorgensen clamp on his headÂ…

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (CMkNk)

101 Did EC just call the Empress evil?

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (sjdRT)


There was a brother and sister who both had the Scanner power.  The brother was good, while the sister turned evil after taking too much of the drug that enhanced her powers.



Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (GQ8sn)

102 Any way we can get Obama in a bar fight?  I know he's The Smartest Man In The World, but something like this might make him even smarter. Maybe, like, Smartest Man In The Universe

Posted by: tu3031 at April 24, 2014 10:39 AM (yv+63)

103 Circles don't exist. They're all the letter o.

Posted by: Mega at April 24, 2014 10:40 AM (hHFOx)

104 94 A lot of womens turn wild after a head trauma. -- This would explain why cavemen used the club technique. Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (sBUAE) GEICO campaign reborn...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:40 AM (CMkNk)

105 Did EC just call the Empress evil? Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (sjdRT) Evil is so judgey. I prefer alternately moral.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 10:40 AM (mf5HN)

106 "Women have acquired savant syndrome 42% less often then men, because Patriarchy" Wait a minute, are we talking a savant "gap" here?

Posted by: MSM at April 24, 2014 10:40 AM (gOoFi)

107 89 Did EC just call the Empress evil? Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (sjdRT) I believe the accepted vernacular is "Alternatively Moral".

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 10:40 AM (da5Wo)

108 An idiot ceiling?

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (LJ7Ze)

109 Annnnd go! I'd like the ability to show Prog/Coms the error of their ways.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (0HooB)

110 My kid brother kicked me so hard in the groin area.....and look what happened to me!

Posted by: Mandingo at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (lqmo/)

111 I am ashamed Horde, no discussion of what super powers one would like to acquire through scientifically applied head bashing? I, for one, look forward to my ability to Scanners people through the internet. Annnnd go! X-ray vision. Too see all the boobies thru clothes. That or being able to pick the lottery. But mostly the boobies.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (uVkIH)

112 like a moron stares at boobs? Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:32 PM (GQ8sn) Usually gives me 4-hour epiphanies.

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Waiting for the Sun at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (bMHBT)

113 I believe the accepted vernacular is "Alternatively Moral".

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 02:40 PM (da5Wo)




How about 'amoral' for short?



Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (GQ8sn)

114 OT: Are any of the horde following the hilarious fight between George Clooney and Steve Wynn that happened in Las Vegas? Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (G+Wff) You can file that under men behaving like children, but I like Wynn. Clowny, not so much.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (x3YFz)

115

A lot of womens turn wild after a head trauma.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 02:35 PM (LJ7Ze)

 

 

I'll take "Why Were Headboards Invented" for $400, Alex.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (BAS5M)

116 The real question is does he still go to the bars and get hammered? Because if he stopped doing that then this is actually a tragedy.

Posted by: Buzzion at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (44SRE)

117 “circles don’t exist”

Oh yeah?!  Well take a look at this!  *starts looking around for a circle*


*continues looking*




Well I'll be a son of a...

Posted by: Dang at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (MNq6o)

118 105 Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 02:40 PM (mf5HN)

Majesty is merely Morally Flexible...

like Nadia Comăneci metaphorically speaking

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:41 AM (TE35l)

119 Annnnd go! Awesome card tricks

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (8ZskC)

120 PIE ANYONE?

Posted by: Pythagoras at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (ujux6)

121 "I prefer alternately moral. " Differently scrupled.

Posted by: Ricardo Kill at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (gOoFi)

122

Getting his weenie squeezed? Someone's a poet.

 

PJ O'Rourke had a piece called "How to Drive Fast on Drugs While Getting Your Wing-Wang Squeezed Without Spilling Your Drink".

 

Republican Party Reptile, maybe, early 90s.  (It's against the rules to look stuff up).

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (JtwS4)

123 Limited Invisibility.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (LJ7Ze)

124 Remember when Hillary "couldn't testify at Bengahzi because..... concussion?" Im thinking this is a "ride along" to that...... Posted by: fixerupper at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (nELVU) Begging for a compare and contrast between him getting smarter after a concussion and her staying just as obnoxious and dumb.

Posted by: Hrothgar [/i][/s][/b] at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (o3MSL)

125 Is anyone willing to hit Biden on the head repeatedly for the good of the country? Dear NSA-That was a joke. ;^) I endorse no violence against our stellar VP

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (XyM/Y)

126 X-ray vision. Too see all the boobies thru clothes. That or being able to pick the lottery. But mostly the boobies. Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 02:41 PM (uVkIH) My super power would be 'The Sexy Look' Tellin' ya... it's gold.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:42 AM (x3YFz)

127 120 PIE ANYONE? --- What is pie, Booger? Hair pie. What is hair pie? *whispering* *excited* "Hair pie!"

Posted by: Booger and Takashi at April 24, 2014 10:43 AM (APuJ7)

128 my superpower?

Empathy...so I could play Red Team to the idiot left's blue

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:43 AM (TE35l)

129 Circles do exist.


The technical definition of a circle is (and I still remember this from my 8th grade math teacher) the locus of all points equidistant from a fixed reference point.


Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:43 AM (GQ8sn)

130 Limited Invisibility.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 02:42 PM (LJ7Ze)


----


Unlimited Translucence ???

Posted by: fixerupper at April 24, 2014 10:43 AM (nELVU)

131 They named a truck after one of those Mathematicians. Euclid.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:43 AM (LJ7Ze)

132 PJ O'Rourke had a piece called "How to Drive Fast on Drugs While Getting Your Wing-Wang Squeezed Without Spilling Your Drink". That is a funny article and book

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 10:43 AM (XyM/Y)

133 Ladies and gentlemen of the Board of Directors:  I have seen the future and we ain't in it.

Posted by: Chairman of the Board, Acme Protractors and Compasses, Inc. at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (JBggj)

134 So that's how Obama did it. Explains a lot.

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (R5UOB)

135 Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 02:38 PM (G+Wff) Hah! Love it. Colore me surprised (not) that Clooney's superpower is to turn into a raging d-bag when immersed in alcohol.

Posted by: LizLem at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (yRwC8)

136 Pfft. But can he talk to cats?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (DmNpO)

137 Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 02:41 PM (uVkIH) Yes if you had the X-ray power, you wouldn't care if you won or lost the lottery!

Posted by: Hrothgar [/i][/s][/b] at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (o3MSL)

138 >The technical definition of a circle is (and I still remember this from my 8th grade math teacher) the locus of all points equidistant from a fixed reference point.


Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:43 PM (GQ8sn)<




As long as you preface that with the stipulation that you are only talking about 2 dimensions, sure. 

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (sjdRT)

139 Circles do exist. The technical definition of a circle is (and I still remember this from my 8th grade math teacher) the locus of all points equidistant from a fixed reference point. Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:43 PM (GQ8sn) Circles are all. A line is a circle with an infinite radius. /nerd

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (x3YFz)

140 Time Travel. I could go back to 1964 and get a piss load of silver dimes.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:44 AM (LJ7Ze)

141 How about 'amoral' for short? Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:41 PM (GQ8sn) Nope. The Empress has a moral code, it's just....slightly different....than most other people's.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 10:45 AM (da5Wo)

142 As long as you preface that with the stipulation that you are only talking about 2 dimensions, sure.


I got dimensions coming out my ass!!!


Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:45 AM (GQ8sn)

143 Personally, I'd pay $1500 for triangles.

Posted by: George Costanza at April 24, 2014 10:45 AM (R5UOB)

144 138 Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 02:44 PM (sjdRT)

Damn it who was the ONT troll who used to go on about dimensions?

He used words like interociter...

this'll bother me all day

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:45 AM (TE35l)

145 So, you know: A hero for us all.

Not if he had a mullet in 2002.

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 10:46 AM (ZKzrr)

146 He used words like interociter...

Isn't that the thing Marvin the Martian tries to blow up Earth with?

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 10:46 AM (ZKzrr)

147 136 Pfft. But can he talk to cats? ------ Anyone can talk to cats. The trick is getting them to listen.

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 10:46 AM (R5UOB)

148 I had an astrophysics prof, she worked on the Russian space program, was Armenian. Her husband proved, without dissent, that without rotation the universe wouldn't exist. Fantanstic woman. Miss her.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:46 AM (x3YFz)

149 Yes if you had the X-ray power, you wouldn't care if you won or lost the lottery! If I had x-ray power & could see thru clothes & look at boobies all day, I'd have won the lottery!

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 10:47 AM (uVkIH)

150 144 Interocitor? MST3000, Groo.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:47 AM (LJ7Ze)

151 "They named a truck after one of those Mathematicians" Thanks, assholes. I go off and invent geometry, change the world forever, and what do you do with my name? You put it on an ugly ass truck. A nice sculpture, a nice building, a park? No. An ugly ass old truck.

Posted by: Euclid at April 24, 2014 10:47 AM (gOoFi)

152 One time I shot my brother in the head with a horse chestnut from my wrist rocket but he just cried like a pussy and still doesn't know shit about math.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (+lsX1)

153 A line is a circle with an infinite radius.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 02:44 PM (x3YFz)


No. A line is a circle with an infinite radius plus 1.

Boo-yah!!!!!!

Posted by: Mega at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (hHFOx)

154 Have I wandered into, or out of Flatland?

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (aDwsi)

155 He used words like interociter... this'll bother me all day Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 02:45 PM (TE35l) Inter... what? 'ems fighting words!

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (x3YFz)

156 If I had x-ray power & could see thru clothes & look at boobies all day, I'd have won the lottery! Christina Hendricks hardest hit.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (0HooB)

157 146 He used words like interociter... Isn't that the thing Marvin the Martian tries to blow up Earth with? ---- Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (R5UOB)

158 ~Figure eight as double four,
Figure four as half of eight.
If you skate, you would be great,
If you could make a figure 8.
That's a circle that turns 'round upon itself.~

Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i][/b] at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (ujux6)

159 Radieschen , do you mean the illudium Q-36 explosive space modulator?

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (sjdRT)

160 146 Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 02:46 PM (ZKzrr)

That is the Alludium Q-36 Space Modulator....

the other thing was from "This Island Earth" I used to beat up on him pretty hard it was back in ~11 IIRC

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (TE35l)

161 I'd opt for the full Superman suite of abilities. Can't go wrong there. If only one ability is allowed, teleportation.

Posted by: Lincolntf at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (ZshNr)

162 X-ray vision. Too see all the boobies thru clothes. That or being able to pick the lottery. But mostly the boobies. Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 02:41 PM (uVkIH) IF you can win the lottery repeatedly, the subsequent wealth would easily put you into the contact of many beautiful women that would render the need for X-Ray vision in order to see them nekkid moot. But the power would be cool for other things, so is still a tossup?

Posted by: LizLem at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (yRwC8)

163 Damn your speedy fingers Foghorn.

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (sjdRT)

164 Space Modulator. Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (LJ7Ze)

165

This thread reminds me.  We haven't  had many of the intellectual musings  of Jose Conseco lately.

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 10:48 AM (zhmsH)

166 FB @ 122 - Sound hilarious.  I'll try and find it.

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 10:49 AM (G+Wff)

167 I saw this movie: Jon Tavolta was in it

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 10:49 AM (t3UFN)

168 One time I shot my brother in the head with a horse chestnut from my wrist rocket but he just cried like a pussy and still doesn't know shit about math. Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at April 24, 2014 02:48 PM (+lsX1) hit him again!

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:49 AM (x3YFz)

169

In many ways, this is definitely not the story of Barack Obama.

Primary among them the whole "savant" part...

Posted by: rabidsquirrel at April 24, 2014 10:50 AM (N8Ijm)

170 Christina Hendricks hardest hit. Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit at April 24, 2014 02:48 PM (0HooB) She certainly would be.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 10:50 AM (da5Wo)

171 163 Damn your speedy fingers Foghorn. Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 02:48 PM (sjdRT) ---- I'm in the cartoon business.

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 10:50 AM (R5UOB)

172 I knock out twice playing football in High School and what are we talking about again?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 10:50 AM (t3UFN)

173 Has anyone here ever actually proved that in the case of a right triangle the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse? I thought not.

Posted by: Suspicious at April 24, 2014 10:51 AM (aDwsi)

174 167 I saw this movie: Jon Tavolta was in it Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 02:49 PM (t3UFN) brain tumor?

Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 10:51 AM (j7iSn)

175 Nope. The Empress has a moral code, it's just....slightly different....than most other people's. Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 02:45 PM (da5Wo) And by different, you mean better. I mean, better for me. Other people may not appreciate it quite as much.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 10:52 AM (mf5HN)

176 173 Scarecrow? Isn't it a Theorem? D'bagging Theorem?

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:52 AM (LJ7Ze)

177 > 173 Has anyone here ever actually proved that in the case of a right triangle the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse? <



Back to geometry class with you.  Right now.

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:52 AM (sjdRT)

178 If only one ability is allowed, teleportation. Posted by: Lincolntf ------------- The Superman I knew, could not teleport.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 10:53 AM (aDwsi)

179 Deflagrating Theorem?

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:53 AM (LJ7Ze)

180 Has anyone here ever actually proved that in the case of a right triangle the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse?

No, because it's not.

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 10:53 AM (ZKzrr)

181

I would like to be able to zap myself to anywhere I want, mete out justice if needed with my Super-Ette strength.

 

I would also like to be able to make people disappear for good.  Not kill them mind you, but just make 'em disappear to some remote island or desert where they can not annoy the common population.

 

I would love to be able to communicate with animals.

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (G+Wff)

182 I was a savant; he's an idiot savant.

Posted by: zombie rené descartes at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (hn5v5)

183 "Hey, baby - I dig your curves.

In a purely mathematical sense, of course..."

(30 quatloos to Ace for the Link Wray reference...)

Posted by: Tex Lovera at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (wtvvX)

184

Man Reveals Secret of Success: Do Nothing But Drink, Party, and Bicep Curls, Then Get Into a Pointless Barfight Where You're Conked on the Head From Behind, and You Too May Become a Mathematical Intuitive Genius

 

 

I think we need a ruling here.  Is he still Horde material?

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch[/i] at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (JtwS4)

185 Yeah, if I can't have Superman's abilities, I'd take the one thing he couldn't do. But on reflection, I'd prefer telekinesis.

Posted by: Lincolntf at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (ZshNr)

186 I saw this movie: Jon Tavolta was in it Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 02:49 PM (t3UFN) brain tumor? Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 02:51 PM (j7iSn) Phenomenon

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (t3UFN)

187 I knock out twice playing football in High School and what are we talking about again? Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 02:50 PM (t3UFN) I got hit in the nuts playing catcher (I was 3d base and our catcher caught a bat in the face so I got promoted). First fucking pictch. Low, under the mitt, kicked up... I saw stars.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (x3YFz)

188 173 Has anyone here ever actually proved that in the case of a right triangle the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse? I thought not. Posted by: Suspicious at April 24, 2014 02:51 PM (aDwsi) Square root of the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse.

Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 10:54 AM (j7iSn)

189 Pythagoras talked like a fag.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (+lsX1)

190 I keep reading the comments here hoping it happens to me too

Posted by: Erik L at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (RYQAM)

191 A nice sculpture, a nice building, a park? No. An ugly ass old truck.

You also got a street in Des Moines.


Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator.

Maybe there was an interociter in it.

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (ZKzrr)

192 No, because it's not. Posted by: HR ---------- Ok, ok. ...the square of the hypotenuse ... picky, picky. The question remains the same.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (aDwsi)

193 I doubt animals would have anything of value to say. Vonnegut went on along that line. Talking with animals.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (LJ7Ze)

194
So, it looks like Terry Pratchett's therapeutic phrenology (from Diskworld) is real! Who knew?

Posted by: Brown Line at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (VrNoa)

195 The ONE day I didn't wear a cup.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:55 AM (x3YFz)

196 186 Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 02:54 PM (t3UFN)

Damn I was gonna say "Boy in the Plastic Bubble"

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (TE35l)

197 My powers would be:


1.  To be in many places at once.

2.  Assume the identity of anyone.

3.  Immortality.

Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (GQ8sn)

198 Far right triangles have been waging a war on the hypotenuse for centuries.

Posted by: Lincolntf at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (ZshNr)

199 Aw, great. Now the morons are going to be whacking each other in the head. Like they're not brain damaged enough already.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (ynL/v)

200 **Smacks  Erik L in the back of the head with a Swingline stapler***

Posted by: Muad'dib at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (sjdRT)

201 I think we need a ruling here. Is he still Horde material?

Do we allow mullets?

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (ZKzrr)

202 My powers would be: *** To not require sleep

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 24, 2014 10:56 AM (DmNpO)

203 193 Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 02:55 PM (LJ7Ze)

Yes, yes social constructs and compacts and all that noise...

hey Baldy you have any bananas?

//Bonzo the Chimp to Dr Doolittle

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (TE35l)

204 Aw, great. Now the morons are going to be whacking each other in the head. Like they're not brain damaged enough already. Posted by: nerdygirl at April 24, 2014 02:56 PM (ynL/v) I guess you didn't hang out with a lot of guys in high school?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (t3UFN)

205 If I had x-ray power & could see thru clothes & look at boobies all day, I'd have won the lottery!

Posted by: rickb223

 

Would this be an x-ray power that you could turn on and off?  Cuz there are some things better left unseen.  If you have ever been to a nudist colony/beach you'll know what I mean.

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (G+Wff)

206 Aw, great. Now the morons are going to be whacking each other in the head. Like they're not brain damaged enough already.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 24, 2014 02:56 PM (ynL/v)




Guess what's going to be happening at the MoMee?



Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (GQ8sn)

207

Has anyone here ever actually proved that in the case of a right triangle the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse?

 

 

No, because it's not.

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 02:53 PM (ZKzrr)

 

 

--------------------------------------------------

 

 

This deserves a consensus. 

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (zhmsH)

208 I would also like to be able to make people disappear for good. Cornfields work.

Posted by: Billy Mumy at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (8ZskC)

209 Sounds like a story I read in Annals Of Mathematics Forum.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (P1WNR)

210 Instead of speed dating, the ladies can start a bonk-on-the-head, then check back later dating sensation. Searching for "the one" while piling up the bodies.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (IXrOn)

211 "Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 24, 2014 02:48 PM"


Aaaand...the Schoolhouse Rock earworm for the win!

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (knoK7)

212 I believe the accepted vernacular is "Alternatively Moral".

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 02:40 PM (da5Wo)

 

 

Capricious.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - Let the Warmth of Spring Grow your Rage at the Outrage Outlet at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (hLRSq)

213 Square root of the sum of the squares of the legs is equal to the hypotenuse. Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 02:54 PM (j7iSn) dude... pythagoras crawled out of his grave to strangle you because all you had to say is: a^2 + b^2 = c^2

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (x3YFz)

214

Part of my fraternity's initiation ritual was proving, no shit, the Pythagorean Theorum under pressure. 

 

It was all keggers and blowjobs after that, though.

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch[/i] at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (JtwS4)

215 If we could only perfect the novel-to-Oreo conversion process... I like the way you think.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (vT9IG)

216 My powers would be, destroy everything leftist and send them all straight to Hell.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (CMkNk)

217 Far right triangles have been waging a war on the hypotenuse for centuries. Posted by: Lincolntf ------------- Vast conspiracy.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 10:57 AM (aDwsi)

218 202 Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 24, 2014 02:56 PM (DmNpO)

With great power comesgreater responsibility REALLY HIGH POST COUNTS

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 10:58 AM (TE35l)

219 We have a Euclid Road in my town.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 10:58 AM (LJ7Ze)

220 Time travel. It would be great until I accidentally killed my grandfather.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 24, 2014 10:58 AM (8ZskC)

221 To be first on every post!

Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:58 AM (GQ8sn)

222 Moe, Larry, and Curly are the fathers of this phenomenon, of course.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 10:58 AM (vT9IG)

223 Sounds like a story I read in Annals Of Mathematics Forum. Posted by: Dr Spank at April 24, 2014 02:57 PM (P1WNR) probably a great dating site.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 10:58 AM (x3YFz)

224 173>> I thought the square of the hypotenuseÂ…Â…was equal to the sum of the squares of the legsÂ… c^2 = a^2 +b^2 HA! your suspicions are confirmed....

Posted by: CrotchetyOldJarhead at April 24, 2014 10:59 AM (60Vyp)

225

Do we allow mullets?

 

Good point.  Application denied.

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch[/i] at April 24, 2014 10:59 AM (JtwS4)

226 A lot of animals are real assholes - especially dolphins. Listening to one of them talk would be like having a conversation with a smirking serial rapist. No thanks!

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at April 24, 2014 10:59 AM (+lsX1)

227 Strike that...


To be first and threadwinner on every post!





I've actually done that, btw!


Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 10:59 AM (GQ8sn)

228 With great power comes greater responsibility REALLY HIGH POST COUNTS *** HA! Then again, your body NEEDS sleep. It just doesn't get it.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 24, 2014 10:59 AM (DmNpO)

229 if this head injury technique is so effective, why isn't Joe Rogan talking theorems n'shit with this week's MMA champ?

Posted by: MC at April 24, 2014 10:59 AM (lrfmC)

230

129 "The technical definition of a circle is (and I still remember this from my 8th grade math teacher) the locus of all points equidistant from a fixed reference point."

 

That's a sphere.   A circle would be all points on a single plane that are equidistant from the reference point.

Posted by: JPS at April 24, 2014 11:00 AM (g1xGh)

231 We have a Euclid Road in my town. Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 02:58 PM (LJ7Ze) would be interested to compare Euclid Road and Martin Luther King Blvd. On one you get shot, on the other you get a C

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:00 AM (x3YFz)

232 223 Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 02:58 PM (x3YFz)

Dear Math Forum I thought in only had a .0~101% chance of happening to me

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:00 AM (TE35l)

233 if this head injury technique is so effective, why isn't Joe Rogan talking theorems n'shit with this week's MMA champ? Posted by: MC at April 24, 2014 02:59 PM (lrfmC) heh.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 24, 2014 11:00 AM (IXrOn)

234 dude... pythagoras crawled out of his grave to strangle you because all you had to say is: a^2 + b^2 = c^2 Posted by: tangonine ----------------------- You guys are deflecting the question.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:00 AM (aDwsi)

235 If only we had the superpower to dispel Climate Change Shift theory... Yeah, we can't even disprove fake science.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 11:00 AM (vT9IG)

236 That's a sphere. A circle would be all points ona singleplane that areequidistant from the reference point. Posted by: JPS at April 24, 2014 03:00 PM (g1xGh) As a physicist, everything is a sphere.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (x3YFz)

237 229 if this head injury technique is so effective, why isn't Joe Rogan talking theorems n'shit with this week's MMA champ? Posted by: MC at April 24, 2014 02:59 PM (lrfmC) Because Joe Rogan's DouchePowers render all other powers obsolete.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (da5Wo)

238 One time I shot my brother in the head with a horse chestnut from my wrist rocket but he just cried like a pussy and still doesn't know shit about math. Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at April 24, 2014 02:48 PM (+lsX1) hit him again! Posted by: tangonine Hit him again!

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (uVkIH)

239 EUCLID INVENTS FIRST CIRCLE. SEZ "EASY AS PI"

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (CMkNk)

240 Report: Second Wave of Health Care Cancellations On The Way Thanks To ObamacareÂ… ButÂ… butÂ… butÂ… the debate is over! Via Vox: The Obama administration is quietly trying to stamp out some of the skimpiest health plans, a decision that industry officials say could trigger yet another wave of cancellation notices. Skimpiest plans? Shit those are obamacare plans, great benefits but not DOCs so no treatment????????

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (t3UFN)

241 You guys are deflecting the question. Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 03:00 PM (aDwsi) It's a superpower.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (x3YFz)

242

You guys are deflecting the question.

 

Yes. It is proven. There is math involved.

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch[/i] at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (JtwS4)

243 So taking a header out of my recliner after too much ValuRite could be a good thing ?

Posted by: McCool at April 24, 2014 11:01 AM (nCSwS)

244 a^2 + b^2 = c^2 Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 02:57 PM (x3YFz) Too simple!

Posted by: BignJames at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (j7iSn)

245 237 Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 03:01 PM (da5Wo)

He's like some weird area of effect Haitian off Heroes....


Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (TE35l)

246 I got hit in the nuts playing catcher (I was 3d base and our catcher caught a bat in the face so I got promoted).

First fucking pictch. Low, under the mitt, kicked up... I saw stars.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 02:54 PM (x3YFz)

 

 

-----------------------------------------

 

 

Don't tell us.  You can now accruately visualize the Big Bang  Theory. 

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (zhmsH)

247 Time Travel. 1964 here I come. Coming back with a sock full of silver dimes.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (LJ7Ze)

248 I like saying "Oiler" though. For Euler, I mean.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (vT9IG)

249 I would love the ability to win every argument with a line cuttingly witty and brilliant.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (CMkNk)

250 A friend of mine got hit in the head with a hammer and all he does is piss himself when you run the microwave.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 24, 2014 11:02 AM (P1WNR)

251 My superpower? I would love to be able to cook. Yes, I'm that bad in the kitchen.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 24, 2014 11:03 AM (6H6o8)

252 ButÂ… butÂ… butÂ… the debate is over! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Posted by: the GOP at April 24, 2014 11:03 AM (vT9IG)

253 249 Easy Peasy. RACIST!!!!

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:03 AM (LJ7Ze)

254 Yes. It is proven. There is math involved. Posted by: Frumious ------------------------ I only asked if anyone here has proven it.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:03 AM (aDwsi)

255 Don't tell us. You can now accruately visualize the Big Bang Theory. Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 03:02 PM (zhmsH) lol... it went something like that.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:03 AM (x3YFz)

256 I got hit in the nuts playing catcher (I was 3d base and our catcher caught a bat in the face so I got promoted). First fucking pictch. Low, under the mitt, kicked up... I saw stars. Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 02:54 PM (x3YFz) I caught and got hit in the nuts all the time. Ah the good old days

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:04 AM (t3UFN)

257 I kinda like getting my weenie squeezed too. Does that make me shallow? I like Bourbon too much too.

Posted by: maddogg at April 24, 2014 11:04 AM (xWW96)

258 Meanwhile, back at the ranch.... TFG's buddies at GE Healthcare blame 404care for declining profits http://tinyurl.com/l2f6kjf

Posted by: McCool at April 24, 2014 11:04 AM (nCSwS)

259 246 Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 03:02 PM (zhmsH) Yankees baseball game, mid 80's or so. Scooter and Tom Seaver were doing the announcing. Someone fouls a ball back right into his nuts. Doubles over in excruciating pain. Game is delayed. Seaver tries to be discreet and says "wow, it really caught him on the thigh," to which Scooter retorts "thigh my eye! He rung his chimes! I heard it all the way up here!"

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (CMkNk)

260 The technical definition of a circle is (and I still remember this from my 8th grade math teacher) the locus of all points equidistant from a fixed reference point. On a plane. Otherwise ya gots a sphere. But here's a head scratcher, a point has no width. So per your definition, the circle is theoretical. So give the point a little width, and you've got an imperfect approximation of a circle. So a theoretical construct that doesn't exist perfectly in real life. Is it real?

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (8ifMA)

261 A friend of mine got hit in the head with a hammer and all he does is piss himself when you run the microwave. Posted by: Dr Spank at April 24, 2014 03:02 PM (P1WNR) So how do you resist inviting him over and running the microwave over and over and over?

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (x3YFz)

262 I got hit in the nuts playing catcher (I was 3d base and our catcher caught a bat in the face so I got promoted). First fucking pictch. Low, under the mitt, kicked up... I saw stars. isn't that the first sentence in Stephen Hawking's autobiography?

Posted by: MC at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (lrfmC)

263 His favorite gift as a child must have been a Spirograph.

Posted by: Blech at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (xBryS)

264 Time Travel. 1964 here I come. Coming back with a sock full of silver dimes Coca Cola & McDonalds stock.

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (uVkIH)

265 For all you math lovers, the "Life of Pi" is not what you think.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 24, 2014 11:05 AM (P1WNR)

266 252 Posted by: the GOP at April 24, 2014 03:03 PM (vT9IG)

I have to admit something....

http://tinyurl.com/k5kloy7

This bit from National Urinal that highlights "neo-moderates" trying to oust Boner to "end the civil war between moderates and the conservatives" means that Canto/Boner/Mcdonald from KY-Jam are in fact "GOP Liberals"

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:06 AM (TE35l)

267 264 Time Travel. 1964 here I come. Coming back with a sock full of silver dimes Coca Cola & McDonalds stock. Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 03:05 PM (uVkIH) I'd come back with the internet!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at April 24, 2014 11:06 AM (CMkNk)

268 Really, though, Georrge Marrtin mustve said hey let's kill Joffrey now! Only an idiot lousy writer would give his audience such as unsatisfying death. For all the rotten shit Joffrey did, it was building up to a glorious moment of retribution. But no, Marrtin robbed his audience of that.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 11:06 AM (vT9IG)

269 So how do you resist inviting him over and running the microwave over and over and over? You don't. Cheap friday night entertainment!

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 11:07 AM (uVkIH)

270 a^2 + b^2 = c^2

I don't think that notation was invented until after Pythagorus' lifetime.

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 11:07 AM (ZKzrr)

271 I caught and got hit in the nuts all the time. Ah the good old days Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 03:04 PM (t3UFN) I wore two cups until he came back.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:07 AM (x3YFz)

272 To hell with circles. Let's get rid of the trapezoids. THEY ARE THE REAL THREAT.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at April 24, 2014 11:08 AM (659DL)

273 268 Really, though, Georrge Marrtin mustve said hey let's kill Joffrey now! Only an idiot lousy writer would give his audience such as unsatisfying death. For all the rotten shit Joffrey did, it was building up to a glorious moment of retribution. But no, Marrtin robbed his audience of that. Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 03:06 PM (vT9IG) You haven't read any of the books have you? Martin doesn't give a shit about karmic justice and glorious endings. People simply die. Like real life.

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 11:08 AM (da5Wo)

274 TFG's buddies at GE Healthcare blame 404care for declining profits

It's almost like taxing something makes people buy less of it.

Posted by: HR at April 24, 2014 11:08 AM (ZKzrr)

275 His favorite gift as a child must have been a Spirograph. *** My favorite toy when I was in first grade was a toy blender. I took it to show and tell because I was FASCINATED by the vortex it created.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (DmNpO)

276 I wore two cups until he came back. Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 03:07 PM (x3YFz) The cups were so uncomfortable.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (t3UFN)

277 http://tinyurl.com/ldr35ja

Tragic news The Kronos Konsort scrapped speaking at a graduation after protests...

"the children crammed to grank Klingon" Moochelle

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (TE35l)

278 a^2 + b^2 = c^2 Only if it's an Isosceles triangle. --Scarecrow

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (8ifMA)

279 So there is hope for Biden ?

Posted by: DrDrill at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (sOFZs)

280 A lot of animals are real assholes - especially dolphins. Listening to one of them talk would be like having a conversation with a smirking serial rapist. No thanks!

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head

 

 

 

You make a good point.  Plus there is the bad breath and unrepetent belching and farting during a conversation.  Who needs to hear their dogs/cats constantly whining for more food and treats? 

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (G+Wff)

281 Wait till the Cadillac Healthcare Tax hits. You aint seen nothing yet.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:09 AM (LJ7Ze)

282 Secret identity or loud and proud?

Posted by: Lincolntf at April 24, 2014 11:10 AM (ZshNr)

283

Geometry is for people who've never seen tits.

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 11:10 AM (zhmsH)

284 I would like to see Government Electric follow Government Motors onto the shitpile of history.

Posted by: maddogg at April 24, 2014 11:10 AM (xWW96)

285 One catcher and two cups?

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:11 AM (LJ7Ze)

286 TFG's buddies at GE Healthcare blame 404care for declining profits... they're probably cooking the books so they can bank a hidden profit plus matching gov't subsidy per the ACA.

Posted by: MC at April 24, 2014 11:11 AM (lrfmC)

287 Reading is for fags.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 11:11 AM (vT9IG)

288 Eh, I'm thinking that at best he had an innate ability that just needed the old Zen begging bowl upside the head bit. (Late to the thread so somebody has already said this, but when has that ever stopped me?)

Posted by: joncelli at April 24, 2014 11:11 AM (RD7QR)

289 Guess what's going to be happening at the MoMee? Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:57 PM (GQ8sn) Throat punches for everyone?

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 24, 2014 11:11 AM (oFCZn)

290 Dear Annals Of Mathematics Forum,
I never thought this would happen to me but...

Posted by: zombie rené descartes at April 24, 2014 11:11 AM (hn5v5)

291 palestinians play kissy kissy with Hamas Israel pulls out of "peace" talks palestinians call Israel stupid? kerry in tears

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:12 AM (t3UFN)

292 Many books are on CD now.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:12 AM (LJ7Ze)

293 Who needs to hear their dogs/cats constantly whining for more food and treats? Body language + eye focus + type and intensity of meow = no need to guess what my cat is trying to say. Feed meeeee! Pay attention to meeeee! I want to eat THAT BIRD! I'm sleepy.... I'm happy.... NO!

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 24, 2014 11:12 AM (8ifMA)

294 Oh wait, so 'shit happens' in Marrtin's GOT universe, just like in real life -- except for dragons...and zombies...and smoke assassins that emit from a ginger's ass.. Okay, so realism, then.

Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 11:13 AM (vT9IG)

295 Awesome sound clip. Link Wray should be used in more fight scenes, not just Desperado.

Posted by: wooga at April 24, 2014 11:13 AM (/Ido6)

296 Guess what's going to be happening at the MoMee? Posted by: EC at April 24, 2014 02:57 PM (GQ8sn) Throat punches for everyone? Atomic wedgies?

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 11:13 AM (uVkIH)

297 294 Posted by: Soothsayer § at April 24, 2014 03:13 PM (vT9IG)

Sooth the Smoke Ninjas bit is not Martin man...it's Sandy Fluck in a wig

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:14 AM (TE35l)

298 Ladies and gentlemen (also the Horde): I give you proof positive that Sen. Cruz is a Moron in good standing. http://bit.ly/1hsmtek Ahhhhh. That's the way to troll.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 11:14 AM (mf5HN)

299 Where I come from all of the math geeks got their asses kicked.

Posted by: Roy at April 24, 2014 11:14 AM (VndSC)

300 I don't think that notation was invented until after Pythagorus' lifetime. Posted by: HR ============= First used, I believe, in ALGOL60 (Arithmetic Language 1960)

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:14 AM (aDwsi)

301 i found myself knowing eveything, especially jeopardy answers and how to speak porteguese...all's i had to do was give up sex.

Posted by: george costanza at April 24, 2014 11:15 AM (cPCDj)

302 Legislation that would require Connecticut education officials to create a special K-12 curriculum about the virtues of organized labor and capitalism took a big step toward becoming reality on Wednesday. CTPost.com reports the state’s Senate – which is controlled by labor-union friendly Democrats – passed the bill 25-10, after lawmakers engaged in a rollicking 90-minute debate. (It’s worth noting that an amendment requiring the study of the U.S. Constitution was defeated 26-9 during that process.) The bill now heads to the Democrat-controlled House of Representatives. If the bill passes both chambers and is signed into law by Democrat Gov. Dan Malloy, “it would order state education officials to develop a (pro-labor and pro-capitalism) curriculum, but would not require its inclusion in local school programs,” CTPost.com reports. Make no mistake – this is mostly a pro-labor bill. The only reason pro-capitalism lessons are included in the proposed curriculum is because Big Labor’s previous attempts to slip their agenda into Connecticut classrooms have failed. This time, the unionists shrewdly decided to include free market teachings as a sweetener for on-the-fence lawmakers – and that strategy appears to be working. CT is as fucked up as MASS.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:15 AM (t3UFN)

303 Where I come from all of the math geeks got their asses kicked. Posted by: Roy ---------------- Yes. But who is it that now controls the ampersands?

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:15 AM (aDwsi)

304 brb, fartin a smoke ninja

Posted by: ginger witch at April 24, 2014 11:15 AM (vT9IG)

305 I would like to see Government Electric follow Government Motors onto the shitpile of history.

Posted by: maddogg

 

 

Me too.  He took you to the dance, bought you dinner, and now he wants a blow job or your goodies go away.  Enjoy.

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 11:16 AM (G+Wff)

306 The cups were so uncomfortable. Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 03:09 PM (t3UFN) and who makes cups? My junk, geometrically, doesn't fit into that thing. Note to self: get rich by designing the right cup.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:17 AM (x3YFz)

307 Middle East "peace" talks falling apart Violence in the Ukraine obama in Japan eating sushi and bowing

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:17 AM (t3UFN)

308 brb, gettin out of the scene as my son/brother is choking to death right in front of me

Posted by: Jamie Lannister at April 24, 2014 11:17 AM (vT9IG)

309 Body language + eye focus + type and intensity of meow = no need to guess what my cat is trying to say.

Feed meeeee!
Pay attention to meeeee!
I want to eat THAT BIRD!
I'm sleepy....
I'm happy....
NO!

Posted by: bonhomme at April 24, 2014 03:12 PM (8ifMA)

 

 

------------------------------------------

 

 

This may sound strange, but I used to have conversations with my Siamese cat.  He had a very large vocabulary of different sounds and meows.  And he only used them when I was talking to him.

 

I don't get out much.

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 11:18 AM (zhmsH)

310 Where I come from all of the math geeks got their asses kicked. Posted by: Roy at April 24, 2014 03:14 PM (VndSC) I posted on this earlier: went to a small school (graduating class of 24). If you weren't an "A" student, you were dismissed. Math nerds ruled.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:18 AM (x3YFz)

311 Don't bring the compass and protractor to the airport. You'll get arrested for having "weapons of math instruction".

Posted by: Dmack at April 24, 2014 11:18 AM (DRG6e)

312 The cups were so uncomfortable.

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 03:09 PM (t3UFN)

That's because you were wearing it wrong...they don't go on your knees.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 11:18 AM (QFxY5)

313 My favorite toy growing up was a bear trap. Mom kept leaving them in my dirty laundry basket.

Posted by: One armed man at April 24, 2014 11:19 AM (R5UOB)

314 Where I come from all of the math geeks got their asses kicked. Posted by: Roy at April 24, 2014 03:14 PM (VndSC) I posted on this earlier: went to a small school (graduating class of 24). If you weren't an "A" student, you were dismissed. Math nerds ruled. Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 03:18 PM (x3YFz) Oh, and we were all ranchers, football players, and our hands were leather by age 14. Fortunate, I was.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:19 AM (x3YFz)

315 Note to self: get rich by designing the right cup.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 03:17 PM (x3YFz)

Already done:

http://www.nuttybuddy.com/athletic-cups.html

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 11:21 AM (QFxY5)

316 Annnnd go! Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 02:36 PM (mf5HN) Instant hypnosis at a distance "Ms Upton, you're getting sleepy......."

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 24, 2014 11:21 AM (TIIx5)

317 That's because you were wearing it wrong...they don't go on your knees. Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 03:18 PM (QFxY5) Well that's were it hung down to?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:21 AM (t3UFN)

318 My superpower would be to get my 14 year old to stop rolling his eyes and scowling when dealing with me. ;^)

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 11:22 AM (XyM/Y)

319 Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 03:21 PM (t3UFN)

Touché

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 11:22 AM (QFxY5)

320 Just wish they had expanded on the "circles don't exist" thing. I'd love to hear the reasoning behind that one.

Posted by: Anachronda at April 24, 2014 11:22 AM (o78gS)

321 Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 03:22 PM (XyM/Y)

Just wait...it gets worse.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 11:23 AM (QFxY5)

322 So, since every thread after 250 comments is a gun thread, what have people heard about the Taurus PT609 9mm? It would be for concealed carry in my purse, if that makes any difference. I was also looking at a Smith and Wesson 9mm, but that would be too large for carrying concealed and I only want one handgun to start with.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:23 AM (GDulk)

323 a^2 + b^2 = c^2 Only if it's an Isosceles triangle. --Scarecrow Posted by: bonhomme at April 24, 2014 03:09 PM (8ifMA) Ahem...

Posted by: Mr Right Triangle at April 24, 2014 11:23 AM (o3MSL)

324 Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 03:23 PM (QFxY5) I have heard that. In what way?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 11:24 AM (XyM/Y)

325 Already done: http://www.nuttybuddy.com/athletic-cups.html Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 24, 2014 03:21 PM (QFxY5) Not bad. I caught a cleat to the taint on fumble drills once. Dove into the pile and it was slow motion: "nooooo!" I need kevlar. Body armor for my business.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:24 AM (x3YFz)

326 The cups were so uncomfortable.

Yeah, they actually go in the front.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at April 24, 2014 11:24 AM (+lsX1)

327 My favorite toy growing up was a bear trap. Mom kept leaving them in my dirty laundry basket. Posted by: One ------------- Actually, as a little kid, playing with rat traps on the farm was a pastime for me. Did I mention that the family was poor?

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:25 AM (aDwsi)

328 Ahem... Posted by: Mr Right Triangle at April 24, 2014 03:23 PM (o3MSL) common core /shakes head

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:25 AM (x3YFz)

329


Ok, ok. ...the square of the hypotenuse ...

picky, picky.

The question remains the same.

 

---  

 

Yes, putting up fences.  3' by 4' by 5' triangle.   The corner of the 3' leg and 5' leg is precisely 90 degrees.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 24, 2014 11:25 AM (sBUAE)

330 Four years ago today Obama wandered off the golf course and decided to make a statement about the Deepwater Horizon. It was already six days after the explosion.

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 11:25 AM (R5UOB)

331 Just wish they had expanded on the "circles don't exist" thing. I'd love to hear the reasoning behind that one.

Posted by: Anachronda at April 24, 2014 03:22 PM (o78gS)

 

 

--------------------------------------------

 

 

Well, they don't.  Because I said so.

Posted by: Baraka O'Preezy at April 24, 2014 11:26 AM (zhmsH)

332 I got hit in the head with a cue ball once and I still don't like math.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at April 24, 2014 11:26 AM (WvXvd)

333 and I only want one handgun to start with. Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:23 PM (GDulk) heh... and so it begins anew.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:26 AM (x3YFz)

334 The cups were so uncomfortable. Yeah, they actually go in the front. Depends on the school......

Posted by: rickb223 at April 24, 2014 11:26 AM (uVkIH)

335 Actually, as a little kid, playing with rat traps on the farm was a pastime for me. Did I mention that the family was poor? Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 03:25 PM (aDwsi) --- We used to DREAM about catching a rat. We used to settle for gravel soup.

Posted by: One armed man at April 24, 2014 11:27 AM (R5UOB)

336 a^2 + b^2 = c^2 Only if it's an Isosceles triangle. --Scarecrow Posted by: bonhomme at April 24, 2014 03:09 PM (8ifMA) Ahem... Posted by: Mr Right Triangle -------------------------------- COEXIST! a^2=b^2=c^2

Posted by: Equilateral Everything at April 24, 2014 11:27 AM (aDwsi)

337 A young Angie Dickenson wearing a nightgown is on the tv. Hmmm, what were you guys talking about....

Posted by: fairweatherbill deerslayer at April 24, 2014 11:27 AM (foVLY)

338

"They named a truck after one of those Mathematicians"

 

Thanks, assholes. I go off and invent geometry, change the world forever, and what do you do with my name? You put it on an ugly ass truck.

 

A nice sculpture, a nice building, a park? No. An ugly ass old truck.

 

 

 

Posted by: Euclid at April 24, 2014 02:47 PM (gOoFi)

 

 

Be thankful you didn't discover what I did.

Posted by: Ernst Grafenberg at April 24, 2014 11:27 AM (BAS5M)

339 brb, gettin fatter

Posted by: Pip at April 24, 2014 11:28 AM (vT9IG)

340 I just skimmed this during a long training meeting and thought "This is the story of . . . wait for it, I'm not going to say 'Obama' . . . Jose Canseco!"

But then I read deeper and realized that it was really the story of some nameless prole.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 24, 2014 11:28 AM (TM1p8)

341 Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:23 PM (GDulk) Darlin, my advice for all 'ettes is start with a nice happy .38 special. But guns (I'll do the female comparison) are like shoes: go with what you're comfortable with. Forget caliber or 'cool', buy what you'd stake your life on. Because if you have to use it, that's exactly what you'll be doing.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (x3YFz)

342 brb, sulkin

Posted by: Sansa Stark at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (vT9IG)

343 Lamest superpower ever. If I get conked on the head, I want to be able to read minds or stop time.

Posted by: AmishDude at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (T0NGe)

344 320 Just wish they had expanded on the "circles don't exist" thing. I'd love to hear the reasoning behind that one. It's all about pi. A circle = pi are squared. But Pi are not squared. Cornbread are squared. QED

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (/g5vp)

345 Pres. Barky speaking to reporters: "Did you know that circles are round? I learn something new every day"

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (aDwsi)

346 I was also looking at a Smith and Wesson 9mm, but that would be too large for carrying concealed and I only want one handgun to start with.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:23 PM (GDulk)

 

 

-------------------------------------------

 

 

First.  What is your goal?  How many guns are you planning on carrying at once.

Posted by: Baraka O'Preezy at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (zhmsH)

347

I am a mathematical illiterate.  If I wasn't born with 10 fingers and 10 toes I'd really be screwed. 

 

Thanks to the internet though I've got all kinds of nice apps for math so I don't have to sweat too much.

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 11:29 AM (G+Wff)

348

This may sound strange, but I used to have conversations with my Siamese cat.

 

One of my most brilliant observations was walking around Thailand and saying "hey, all the cats are Siamese".

Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch[/i] at April 24, 2014 11:30 AM (JtwS4)

349 Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 03:26 PM (x3YFz) Lol, yeah. I figured it was better to start there than make silly declarations about only ever having one gun.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:30 AM (GDulk)

350 It's all about pi. A circle = pi are squared. But Pi are not squared. Cornbread are squared. QED Posted by: Bevel ------------------- Moreover, Pi is irrational, thus can not be a reliable reference.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:30 AM (aDwsi)

351 We used to DREAM about catching a rat. We used to settle for gravel soup. Posted by: One armed man at April 24, 2014 03:27 PM (R5UOB) burnt dirt. yum.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:30 AM (x3YFz)

352 Mmm. Pi are me.

Posted by: homer simpson at April 24, 2014 11:31 AM (hn5v5)

353 The best long gun for womens is an AR-15.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:31 AM (LJ7Ze)

354 322 Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:23 PM (GDulk)

Taurus can be hit and miss...

I got lucky with my Thunderbolt from them but a lot of people's ammo tube misfed...

the PT-609 weighs in at 1.8 lbs and is a Plymer/Steel combo similar to the S+W latter models...

I'd suggest you look at the S+W 6906 3d gen Wonder Nine

http://tinyurl.com/mwyvszu

It was marketed as a High-Cap back-up CCW for LE and has a wider range of holsters and rigs.

Just my 1/2 pence

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:32 AM (TE35l)

355 This may sound strange, but I used to have conversations with my Siamese cat. I do that all the time and they usually make more sense than I do

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:32 AM (t3UFN)

356 Moreover, Pi is irrational, thus can not be a reliable reference. It never shuts up, and keeps changing its story.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 24, 2014 11:32 AM (/g5vp)

357

I've got to pay off some bills first and then I want a nice hand gun.  Nothing fancy just enough to blow the fuck out of someone who makes the mistake of threatening my life.

 

Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 11:32 AM (G+Wff)

358 Off slime sock

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 11:32 AM (zhmsH)

359 One of my most brilliant observations was walking around Thailand and saying "hey, all the cats are Siamese". Posted by: Frumious -------------- * makes note to remember this when next in Myanmar *

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:32 AM (aDwsi)

360 I have a nice little Glock 17. Lightweight, and it will drive tacks at 25 meters. Wife doesn't like it because of the slide, she's a wheel gun girl.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:33 AM (x3YFz)

361
I was boinked in the bush, and became a celebrity slut Obama supporter who will do absolutely anything to remain relevant.  Ladies, protect your bush or you will suffer the indignity of conservative lies and fabrications about your private life. 

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at April 24, 2014 11:33 AM (nQjHM)

362

I won't be greedy ... near term prophecy will do it for me. Just enough to see ahead to the flop, turn, or river will do.

 

If I just had that, I could get the rest on my own.

Posted by: ScoggDog at April 24, 2014 11:33 AM (/95J8)

363 burnt dirt. yum. Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 03:30 PM (x3YFz) --- Only on holidays though.

Posted by: One armed man at April 24, 2014 11:33 AM (R5UOB)

364 It never shuts up, and keeps changing its story. Posted by: Bevel ------------------------- I know, I know. Tedious as hell.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:34 AM (aDwsi)

365 I just got out of a godawful long meeting and want to go home.  *whine*


But I saw this on an earlier thread and figured it's far enough into THIS thread to go OT, so...


Morons at a ComicCon.


Do. Not. Cross. The. Streams.


Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 01:55 PM (mf5HN)



I NEED this.   Make it happen, people.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 24, 2014 11:34 AM (4df7R)

366 Japanese PM: Obama is a philanderer and is planning his divorce from Michelle after he leaves office. DRUDGE BAM!

Posted by: Behind Enemy Lines at April 24, 2014 11:34 AM (thLL8)

367 ACE: Start a gun thread.... or this will turn into one.

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 11:34 AM (R5UOB)

368 It never shuts up, and keeps changing its story.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 24, 2014 03:32 PM (/g5vp)

 

Like when you confront your wife on how the fuck she maxed out all your credit cards.

Posted by: Insomniac at April 24, 2014 11:35 AM (DrWcr)

369 This story is right out of Jorge Luis Borges' Funes el memorioso, published in 1942.

Posted by: Buddha at April 24, 2014 11:35 AM (s/sIv)

370 Posted by: Baraka O'Preezy at April 24, 2014 03:29 PM (zhmsH) I certainly hope that carrying one at a time will be sufficient . I had originally been planning on getting a Bersa but apparently they don't make a 9mm and I wanted that because of availability and I honestly prefer it to the .32 which is the only other one I have experience with. I've heard Taurus get really mixed reviews here so was hoping someone may have first-hand knowledge.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:35 AM (GDulk)

371 The abilities I would want? Hmmmm.... 1. Invisibility 2. The ability to fix or build anything 3. Prehensile marriage tackle

Posted by: joncelli at April 24, 2014 11:35 AM (RD7QR)

372 366 Japanese PM: Obama is a philanderer and is planning his divorce from Michelle after he leaves office. DRUDGE BAM! --- Can you blame him?

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 11:35 AM (R5UOB)

373 Only on holidays though. Posted by: One armed man at April 24, 2014 03:33 PM (R5UOB) Nice to meet someone who also shopped for clothes in their cousin's hand-me-down closet.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:35 AM (x3YFz)

374 I was boinked in the bush, Posted by: Sandra Fluke at April 24, 2014 03:33 PM (nQjHM) So his aim was a little off.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 24, 2014 11:36 AM (TIIx5)

375
Morons at a ComicCon.




Do. Not. Cross. The. Streams.


Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 01:55 PM (mf5HN)

I NEED this. Make it happen, people.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit at April 24, 2014 03:34 PM (4df7R)

 

That would be epic.  We'd end up blacklisted from every future ComicCon ever, but it would be worth it!

Posted by: Insomniac at April 24, 2014 11:36 AM (DrWcr)

376 Can you blame him? I cannot.

Posted by: Behind Enemy Lines at April 24, 2014 11:36 AM (thLL8)

377 I know, I know. Tedious as hell. Almost as big a bore as dining philosophers. And talk about silverware hogs...

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 24, 2014 11:36 AM (nFI1a)

378 Japanese PM: Obama is a philanderer and is planning his divorce from Michelle after he leaves office. DRUDGE BAM! --- Can you blame him? Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 24, 2014 03:35 PM (R5UOB) Reggie lives?

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:36 AM (x3YFz)

379 I was under the mistaken assumption that AmishDude lived in PA.  My mistake.

Posted by: Jean at April 24, 2014 11:37 AM (Zj6oB)

380 Japanese PM: Obama is a philanderer and is planning his divorce from Michelle after he leaves office.



So the Japanese PM caught Obammy hanging out at a ritzy Host club   in Ginza    I assume?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 24, 2014 11:37 AM (4df7R)

381 I remember hand me downs. My brother was five years older so nothing came even close to fitting.

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:37 AM (LJ7Ze)

382 375 Posted by: Insomniac at April 24, 2014 03:36 PM (DrWcr)

That or comped...

no in-betweens...


Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:37 AM (TE35l)

383 Like when you confront your wife on how the fuck she maxed out all your credit cards. Posted by: Insomniac ------------------- " but Honey, I got it all on sale... "

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:37 AM (aDwsi)

384 Is this another one of those "Studly Obama wows the women" planted stories or did they suggest the correct gender of people whom he might be having affairs with?

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 24, 2014 11:38 AM (XyM/Y)

385 Posted by: Cheri at April 24, 2014 03:32 PM (G+Wff) Pretty much how I feel. One of the saddest bits of my life right now is that I no longer have anyone who loves me enough to get me a gun for my birthday .

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:38 AM (GDulk)

386 That would be epic. We'd end up blacklisted from every future ComicCon ever, but it would be worth it!

Posted by: Insomniac at April 24, 2014 03:36 PM (DrWcr)




And ace could come with us and totally blend in!  No one's going to notice an Ewok at Comic-Con.   He'd probably get compliments on his costume!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 24, 2014 11:38 AM (4df7R)

387 Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit at April 24, 2014 03:34 PM (4df7R) Hi Beth!!!! Hey MWR, here's something that AtC posted to brighten your day...http://tinyurl.com/lujq2u2

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 11:38 AM (da5Wo)

388 "Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:35 PM"

Love my S[ampersand]W 640 Centennial.  Loaded with heavy .38 Spcl +P.  .357 is fun, but the flaming muzzle blast is about 2 feet long.  Nice little wheelgun for concealed carry.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 24, 2014 11:38 AM (knoK7)

389 I was under the mistaken assumption that AmishDude lived in PA. My mistake. Posted by: Jean -------------- So, stereotyping, eh? Microaggression.

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 11:39 AM (aDwsi)

390 Japanese PM: Obama is a philanderer and is planning his divorce from Michelle after he leaves office.

Should you really be saying that to the guy with the keys to the carrier battle groups between you and China?

Posted by: Jean at April 24, 2014 11:39 AM (Zj6oB)

391 " but Honey, I got it all on sale... " Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 03:37 PM (aDwsi) Oh, yeah. Should mention this Taurus is on sale for $150 off for another week.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:40 AM (GDulk)

392 385 Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:38 PM (GDulk)

Polli were we in the same state I'd give you my FEG P-9rk Ma'am...

have to use an FFL and it is a purse gun but I would...

I gave my boss a Swiss K-31, my driver a Winchester 97, and my friend a 7.4 inch Navy Colt....

Laws and hassles ma'am...

laws and hassles

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:40 AM (TE35l)

393 a knock on the head and ...

http://tinyurl.com/lh69364

Posted by: Clint and the Punk[/i][/b][/s] at April 24, 2014 11:40 AM (DL2i+)

394 Pretty much how I feel. One of the saddest bits of my life right now is that I no longer have anyone who loves me enough to get me a gun for my birthday . Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:38 PM (GDulk) Sounds like an IndieGoGo campaign to me.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 24, 2014 11:41 AM (TIIx5)

395

Polli ...

 

... these guys are idiots. Go crossbow or don't go at all. Longbows are for pussies.

Posted by: ScoggDog at April 24, 2014 11:41 AM (/95J8)

396 that I no longer have anyone who loves me enough to get me a gun for my birthday . Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:38 PM (GDulk) awww. Darlin I'd buy you an M240 if I could.

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:42 AM (x3YFz)

397 Colt Python?

Posted by: Boss Moss at April 24, 2014 11:42 AM (LJ7Ze)

398 I have to wonder if AmishDude wasnÂ’t better off under the Pope.

Posted by: Stephen Price Blair at April 24, 2014 11:42 AM (WX3R9)

399 Nood up.

Posted by: RedMindBlueState at April 24, 2014 11:42 AM (knoK7)

400 I've heard Taurus get really mixed reviews here so was hoping someone may have first-hand knowledge.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:35 PM (GDulk)

 

 

--------------------------------------------

 

 

Taurus shoots just like any other gun (unless you become anully fixated on trigger-pulls, etc.).  More than likely if your in a situation that you need the use it, the accuracy won't matter all that much either, since the person you'll be shooting at will probably be no more than 15 - 20 feet away.

Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 11:42 AM (zhmsH)

401 Pretty much how I feel. One of the saddest bits of my life right now is that I no longer have anyone who loves me enough to get me a gun for my birthday .

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:38 PM (GDulk)

 

Awwww.  We love you, Polliwog!  We're just dick broke...

Posted by: Insomniac at April 24, 2014 11:43 AM (DrWcr)

402 he came to the conclusion that “circles don’t exist.”

Not around there anyways.

Posted by: DaveA[/i][/b][/s] at April 24, 2014 11:43 AM (DL2i+)

403 In interesting news, base exchanges (PX/BX) now sell guns. No tax. FREE FOR ALL WOOOOO!

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:43 AM (x3YFz)

404 Hi Beth!!!!

Hey MWR, here's something that AtC posted to brighten your day...http://tinyurl.com/lujq2u2

Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 24, 2014 03:38 PM (da5Wo)



OMG that's hilarious.   The collective wailing and gnashing of teeth!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 24, 2014 11:44 AM (4df7R)

405 I NEED this. Make it happen, people. Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit at April 24, 2014 03:34 PM (4df7R) I am not dressing up as Sailor Moon.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 11:44 AM (mf5HN)

406 We used to settle for gravel soup. Gravel Soup?! Luxury! It was ditch silt for us. And .we.were.grateful.

Posted by: toby928© at April 24, 2014 11:44 AM (QupBk)

407 405 Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 24, 2014 03:44 PM (mf5HN)

YES!

Those who had Sailor Mars take your stubs to the window

Posted by: sven10077 at April 24, 2014 11:45 AM (TE35l)

408 " but Honey, I got it all on sale... " Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 03:37 PM (aDwsi) And I "saved" you money

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:45 AM (t3UFN)

409 Posted by: ScoggDog at April 24, 2014 03:41 PM (/95J Lol. Thank you T9 and Sven. You're both very sweet. Of course if John had lived I don't know as that I'd be looking for a gun, so I guess I'm just hard to please.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:45 AM (GDulk)

410 Not the PM; anMP. And he didn't finish the fancy sushi because he doesn't like the taste of fish so, you know, the evidence continues to accumulate.

Posted by: [/i]andycanuck[/b] at April 24, 2014 11:46 AM (hn5v5)

411 383 Like when you confront your wife on how the fuck she maxed out all your credit cards. Posted by: Insomniac ------------------- " but Honey, I got it all on sale... " Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 24, 2014 03:37 PM (aDwsi) *bangs head against wall repeatedly* Uh huh.......

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Waiting for the Sun at April 24, 2014 11:46 AM (bMHBT)

412 In interesting news, base exchanges (PX/BX) now sell guns. No tax. FREE FOR ALL WOOOOO! Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 03:43 PM (x3YFz) Isn't this a return to an old policy? IIRC, most of the original pre-B CZ75s in the US came from PX purchases in European bases, then imported with military folks' personal effects.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 24, 2014 11:46 AM (TIIx5)

413 And Insomniac too. Read your comment after already posting.

Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 11:46 AM (GDulk)

414 I've heard Taurus get really mixed reviews here so was hoping someone may have first-hand knowledge. Posted by: Polliwog the 'Ette at April 24, 2014 03:35 PM (GDulk) -------------------------------------------- Taurus shoots just like any other gun (unless you become anully fixated on trigger-pulls, etc.). More than likely if your in a situation that you need the use it, the accuracy won't matter all that much either, since the person you'll be shooting at will probably be no more than 15 - 20 feet away. Posted by: Soona at April 24, 2014 03:42 PM (zhmsH) It depends on when/where it was manufactured. They ran some questionable steel as barrels for many years. Meaning: you'd put 500 rounds down range and the barrel would increasingly deteriorate, possibly leading to a catastrophic misfire. I'm not a fan, and I'll never purchase one of their guns, but folks have said recently that they increased their QA so they're not as suspect. I'm old school, grumpy, and set in my ways, so I'll never buy one. In my order of reliability: Sig, HK. Those are what I carry. I have other brands but my P229 has never malfunctioned and I've put about 4K rounds through it and replaced the barrel twice (for maintenance, not for error).

Posted by: tangonine at April 24, 2014 11:48 AM (x3YFz)

415 super powers one would like to acquire through scientifically applied head bashing?

Smack the stupid right out of someone.

My arm would get tired but it'd be worth it.

Posted by: DaveA[/i][/b][/s] at April 24, 2014 11:54 AM (DL2i+)

416 TWO SUSPECTS IN CUSTODY AFTER SHELTER IN PLACE ORDERED AT NAVAL BASE POINT LOMA

Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 24, 2014 11:56 AM (t3UFN)

417 everybody knows pi are round and cornbread are square

Posted by: Festus at April 24, 2014 11:57 AM (++HCY)

418

I used to be an intuitive mathematical genius, until around 2002 I got hit on the head - hey, wait a minute!

 

Posted by: West at April 24, 2014 11:58 AM (1Rgee)

419 the symptoms sound like an LSD trip

Posted by: Lady Billingsgate at April 24, 2014 12:13 PM (+CfIC)

420 Man Reveals Secret of Success: Do Nothing But Drink Val-U-Rite, Party, and Bicep Curls, Then Get Into a Pointless Barfight Where You're Conked on the Head From Behind This sounds like the AOSHQ lifestyle done right.

Posted by: physics geek at April 24, 2014 12:14 PM (MT22W)

421

“If it could happen to me, it could happen to anyone," he says in his new book

Ummm, sounds like that savant thing didn't reach every part of his brain.....

 

Posted by: GWB at April 24, 2014 12:16 PM (Yv2t4)

422 406 We used to settle for gravel soup.

Gravel Soup?! Luxury! It was ditch silt for us.

And .we.were.grateful.   Ditch silt? Whooooaaa!, Now we are all "We got ditch silt!"   My family would've been ecstatic to get ditch silt! All we ever got was a bit o' vermiculite that was tossed out, thrice used, by the wal-mart garden shop. I remember me brother asking "Mom, couldn't we get a little ditch silt instead of this verm- verm- white gritty stuff?" and ma would say" You'll take Vermiculite and like it!"   Ditch silt indeed.        

Posted by: West at April 24, 2014 12:20 PM (1Rgee)

423 Now, my twin sister and myself were dropped on our heads, just born, and stuck in the toilet. If not for grandma and that shotgun, I would not have taught frat boys in the calculus when I was 10, and sis would not have flown helicopters, or helped create DHS. Good times. Except for the nuclear veapons. And dead goats. There was a rule for drowning useless changling bastards before fires and pestilence, probably not enforced apoliticallly, these days.

Posted by: neal at April 24, 2014 12:34 PM (H5Xyz)

424 Meh.  Same thing happened to Patrick Starr when he jumped off the cliff and broke his head. 

:-) 

Posted by: TheresaD-Even though everyone's long gone from this thread because that's the way I roll at April 24, 2014 12:36 PM (5+6y1)

425
Great, but the question is: Does it help him score with chicks?
(Mob scenes of guys saying "hit me from behind" ensue)

"Pi is irrational"

You never win an argument with Pi either, it's always constant, never changes.
Pi must be a woman.

Posted by: Hairy Reed at April 24, 2014 12:44 PM (wT9UL)

426 "366 Japanese PM: Obama is a philanderer and is planning his divorce from Michelle after he leaves office."

Clearly a planted story by Obama team flunkies so the cuckolded Obama seems as alpha-man-manly as the philandering Hollande saucy French PM and 'bareback rider' Pres Vlad 'tiny' Putin, whose GF calls him 'vlad the impaler'.



Posted by: Hairy Reed at April 24, 2014 12:53 PM (wT9UL)

427 That guy is totally wrong about circles!

Posted by: The Circle Jerk at April 24, 2014 01:18 PM (nbGZj)

428 My savantism isn't acquired - and it's fantastic!

Posted by: Julia Louis Dreyfuss at April 24, 2014 02:27 PM (8MjqI)

429 And spectacular.

Posted by: Julia Louis Dreyfuss at April 24, 2014 02:30 PM (8MjqI)

430 I regret my dad never followed through all those times when he said he was going to 'knock some sense into my head".

Posted by: profligatewaste at April 24, 2014 02:47 PM (R3JkO)

431 He's right. Circles don't exist. This is probably very important for quantum theory. I'd like to hear this elaborated, though Could you include more?

Posted by: Sammy Finkelman at April 25, 2014 06:10 AM (fcXn+)

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