April 26, 2014

Movie Night With The Morons: Battleship Edition - [Niedermeyer's Dead Horse]
— Open Blogger

Welcome to the first in what I hope will become a series of the 'Movie Night With The Morons' posts. It's Spring, and the days are long, so we'll see how it goes for attendance. We'll poll the group for future feature selections.


Tonight's feature is Battleship, starring Taylor Kitsch, Liam Neeson, Brooklyn Decker, and this remarkable fellow.

About Gregory Gadson:

Colonel Gregory D. Gadson (born 1966) is an active duty Colonel in the United States Army and the current Garrison Commander of the U.S. Army Fort Belvoir . He is also a bilateral above-the-knee amputee, occasional actor, and motivational speaker. He served in the U.S. Army for more than 20 years as a field artillery officer and served on active duty for Operations Desert Shield and Desert Storm, Operation Joint Forge, Operation Enduring Freedom, and Operation Iraqi Freedom.

Gadson played football for West Point between 1985 and 1988, wearing the number 98 jersey and serving as co-captain. He was present when the New York Giants beat the Washington Redskins at FedExField in 2007 at the invitation of West Point classmate Mike Sullivan, who was then on the coaching staff of the New York Giants. This win was the beginning of a 10-game winning streak and came after Gadson had made an inspirational speech to the team. The streak culminated in the Giants winning Super Bowl XLII.[2] and in recognition for his contribution, Gadson received a specially minted Super Bowl ring.[3]

Gadson graduated from West Point in 1989 and holds Masters Degrees in Information Systems and Policy Management from Webster University. He is a graduate of the Command and General Staff College and the Advanced Field Artillery Officers Course and in 2010, he became an Army War College Fellow at the Institute of World Politics in Washington, D.C.

Did I mention Brooklyn Decker?

Oh, and ladies. How could this fellow escape notice?

If you have HBO, the movie is presently available via On-Demand for free. If not, it is available via On-Demand and Roku for just $2.99.

So, pop your popcorn and settle in. Let's make a night of it.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 03:50 PM | Comments (289)
Post contains 366 words, total size 3 kb.

1 Ok....First?

Posted by: Mr. alu Fods: Semi-Pro Lurker at April 26, 2014 03:53 PM (dVk8Y)

2 Apparently so.

Posted by: Mr. alu Fods: Semi-Pro Lurker at April 26, 2014 03:54 PM (dVk8Y)

3 Yep.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 03:54 PM (DmNpO)

4 Got the movie set to go. Say when.

Posted by: Mr. alu Fods: Semi-Pro Lurker at April 26, 2014 03:55 PM (dVk8Y)

5 Fun fact: Brooklyn Decker is married to Andy Roddick. Shortly after the marriage Roddick retired from tennis.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 26, 2014 03:56 PM (oFCZn)

6 just rented it off xbox. Standing by.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 03:56 PM (x3YFz)

7 Brooklyn Decker is married to Andy Roddick. Shortly after the marriage Roddick retired from tennis.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 26, 2014 07:56 PM (oFCZn)


clearly, she is sapping his strength for anything but marital bliss.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 03:56 PM (8lmkt)

8 At 8 pm hit the play button. I have it queued up to the beginning as well.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 03:57 PM (DmNpO)

9 Someone stole my nipples!

Posted by: Brooklyn Decker at April 26, 2014 04:00 PM (zDsvJ)

10 Dirty Harry is on,sorry Battleship.

Posted by: steevy at April 26, 2014 04:00 PM (zqvg6)

11 Amazon Instant has it also.

Posted by: Emily at April 26, 2014 04:01 PM (7Rn+/)

12 Amazon Instant has it also. *** Do they stream to laptops or tablets?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:01 PM (DmNpO)

13 isn't that shot of the Beacon Project the observatory in HI?

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:02 PM (x3YFz)

14 OK, there's the solar system...

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 04:02 PM (5i94q)

15 Alexander Skarsgård is the one I forgot to add to my list of actors whose career is heading for the toilet due to their poor choices of which movies to appear in. Come on, Al! You're not getting younger and that hairline isn't going to stop receeding...

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 04:03 PM (8c12T)

16 Those were some fairly bright radio waves...

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 04:03 PM (5i94q)

17 I am convinced that the entire Skarsgard family has a collective portrait up in the attic. *scurries for popcorn* I don't wanna miss Taylor Lautner getting tazed in the best meet cute ever.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:04 PM (dMSj2)

18 isn't that shot of the Beacon Project the observatory in HI? *** Yup!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:04 PM (DmNpO)

19 Enter Decker

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:05 PM (DmNpO)

20 Alexander Skarsgard is pretty good bait but I have too much to do. Sigh. Popcorn sounds great right now, tho.

Posted by: Gem at April 26, 2014 04:06 PM (zw+pb)

21 I don't wanna miss Taylor Lautner getting tazed in the best meet cute ever. *** It is a great scene

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:06 PM (DmNpO)

22 I MISSED IT!

WAIT!

EVERYONE START OVER!

Three!... Two... One!...

"...said some jackass who thought he was being funny."

Posted by: Not That Slapweasel Guy, Except... at April 26, 2014 04:06 PM (lq3Ak)

23 Great use of Mancini music!

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 04:07 PM (5i94q)

24 * stares at monitor, feels left out. sobs softly *

Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 26, 2014 04:07 PM (aDwsi)

25 Yes, Amazon Instant will stream. They are charging $2.99 for the rental.

Posted by: Emily at April 26, 2014 04:07 PM (7Rn+/)

26 Enjoy the movie, folks! 
-I'ma watch some baseball.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:07 PM (lq3Ak)

27 getting tazered while bringing the hot girl a chicken burrito: which one of you wrote this movie?

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:08 PM (x3YFz)

28 Oh, wait. That's not him. Must be the Taylor guy... could swear I've seen that same photo of Eric, er, Alexander.

Posted by: Gem at April 26, 2014 04:08 PM (zw+pb)

29 It is a great scene Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:06 PM (DmNpO) If I were the judge I would totally let him off the hook too. The Court takes judicial notice that of course he broke in to get her a burrito, I mean c'mon. That is the only possible life choice to make. Charges dismissed.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:09 PM (dMSj2)

30 "* stares at monitor, feels left out. sobs softly *"
Posted by: Mike Hammer at April 26, 2014 08:07 PM (aDwsi)

There, there, buddy.  There's always "Huckabee".

...*Sobs Uncontrollably*

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:09 PM (lq3Ak)

31 27 getting tazered while bringing the hot girl a chicken burrito: which one of you wrote this movie? Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 08:08 PM (x3YFz) AlextheChick must've wrote the meet cute scene. I figured she'd throw in a throat punch but whatever.

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 26, 2014 04:10 PM (oFCZn)

32

Do they stream to laptops or tablets?

***

Yes, if you're Prime, streaming to any device is free.  You just have to register it.

Posted by: DL Sly at April 26, 2014 04:10 PM (nMWc+)

33 He's got a nice house: http://realestalker.blogspot.com/2012/10/alexander-skarsgard-buys-tinseltown.html

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 04:10 PM (8c12T)

34 He's got a nice house: *** Sweet!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:11 PM (DmNpO)

35 ok. soccer is never cool.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:11 PM (x3YFz)

36 ok. soccer is never cool. *** Well, it's not exactly volleyball, now is it?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:12 PM (DmNpO)

37 lol, tangonine!!!! 

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:12 PM (8lmkt)

38 Is RIMPAC a real thing?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:14 PM (DmNpO)

39 Hey Mike we can play Battleship instead.

Posted by: freaked at April 26, 2014 04:14 PM (JdEZJ)

40 Great thread idea. Just a thought, but maybe you might pick a movie on network television sometimes, so we could watch at the same time (I know, I know, there's rarely any good movies on network TV) Alternatively you could pick a "start time" that we could all try to start on... Oh who am I kidding, these drunks are harder to herd than a horde of morons

Posted by: Max Power at April 26, 2014 04:14 PM (q177U)

41 Why do people play naked vollyball? Everything's got to be flopping. That can't be comfortable.

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 04:14 PM (8c12T)

42 NDH, RIMPAC though badly named is a real thing ... and that's actual footage.

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 04:14 PM (5i94q)

43 Just a thought, but maybe you might pick a movie on network television sometimes, so we could watch at the same time (I know, I know, there's rarely any good movies on network TV) Alternatively you could pick a "start time" that we could all try to start on... Oh who am I kidding, these drunks are harder to herd than a horde of morons *** If I had an idea a week or so in advance of what is coming on a network channel, that would be a great idea. Do you know how to find that out?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:15 PM (DmNpO)

44 It won't stream to my Samsung tablet! And I have Prime.

Posted by: megthered at April 26, 2014 04:15 PM (iR4Dg)

45 My laptop could use some vigorous streaming about now...

Posted by: Max Power at April 26, 2014 04:16 PM (q177U)

46 The wife and I are in but late

Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 04:16 PM (HDwDg)

47 Alexander Skarsgard has a very nice brother too. http://bit.ly/1rtStnY I'm not even going to mention Stellan.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:16 PM (dMSj2)

48 show me 1 officer that drives an F250.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:16 PM (x3YFz)

49 I believe that 11-year-old boys may be the target audience for this dreck.

Posted by: Buddha at April 26, 2014 04:17 PM (s/sIv)

50 I believe that 11-year-old boys may be the target audience for this dreck. *** It works for me!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:18 PM (DmNpO)

51 I'm on an aircraft carrier, USS Lexington, does that count? Okay, it's retired, and a memorial now but I have to sleep on it with a bunch of strangers and about 200 hyper cub scouts. Yeah, I feel like I'm in hell. Did I mention the bunks....stacked three deep...in close quarters,etc???

Posted by: lindafell on the USS Lexington at April 26, 2014 04:18 PM (7+uJ1)

52 And Rihanna makes her debut

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:19 PM (DmNpO)

53 Is RIMPAC a real thing? Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:14 PM (DmNpO) yup.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:19 PM (x3YFz)

54 I'm on an aircraft carrier, USS Lexington, does that count? Okay, it's retired, and a memorial now but I have to sleep on it with a bunch of strangers and about 200 hyper cub scouts. Yeah, I feel like I'm in hell. Did I mention the bunks....stacked three deep...in close quarters,etc??? *** God Bless ya!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:20 PM (DmNpO)

55 I believe that 11-year-old boys may be the target audience for this dreck. Posted by: Buddha at April 26, 2014 08:17 PM (s/sIv) Which is why it's perfect for the Horde. Of the many many many things that I love about this move is that Liam Neeson is playing Admiral Liam Neeson. Kind of how Sean Connery was playing Comrade Captain Sean Connery in Hunt For Red October.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:20 PM (dMSj2)

56 'I'm sorry, Brooklyn, it's over.'

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2014 04:20 PM (t6UXW)

57 RIMPAC. Pshaw. Try FLEASWTRACENPAC (pronounced FLEE -ass-wah-TRA-sin-pack). Stands for Fleet Anti-Submarine Warfare Training Center, Pacific. It's in San Diego.

Posted by: jwpaine at April 26, 2014 04:20 PM (68O4K)

58 Every time I see those Navy *cough* "battle dress* uniforms (a.k.a., you'll never find me if I fall overboard) I just shake my head in awe.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:21 PM (x3YFz)

59 RIMPAC. Pshaw. Try FLEASWTRACENPAC (pronounced FLEE -ass-wah-TRA-sin-pack). Stands for Fleet Anti-Submarine Warfare Training Center, Pacific. It's in San Diego. Posted by: jwpaine at April 26, 2014 08:20 PM (68O4K) It's an annual exercise.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:22 PM (x3YFz)

60 52 And Rihanna makes her debut Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:19 PM (DmNpO) Sans umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh.

Posted by: Thrawn at April 26, 2014 04:22 PM (WlWt+)

61 Brooklyn Decker is married to Andy Roddick. Shortly after the marriage Roddick retired from tennis. "I have nothing left to prove."

Posted by: Andy Roddick at April 26, 2014 04:22 PM (t6UXW)

62 Provoking Liam Neeson into becoming overprotective of his daughter. What could possibly go wrong?

Posted by: Curate at April 26, 2014 04:23 PM (KXgbn)

63 I'm on an aircraft carrier, USS Lexington, does that count? Okay, it's retired, and a memorial now but I have to sleep on it with a bunch of strangers and about 200 hyper cub scouts. Yeah, I feel like I'm in hell. Did I mention the bunks....stacked three deep...in close quarters,etc??? *** God Bless ya! Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:20 PM (DmNpO LOL. Poor bastard.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:23 PM (x3YFz)

64 I graduated WP before Gadson (1983), but I remember him being there.

Posted by: Mole6 at April 26, 2014 04:23 PM (m0le6)

65 Dicknuts,

Oops, that's Sea Tunt not Battleship

Posted by: DaveA[/i][/b][/s] at April 26, 2014 04:23 PM (DL2i+)

66 Brought to you by Hasbro

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 26, 2014 04:24 PM (V4CBV)

67 Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 08:20 PM (dMSj2)

*lips full of lamb-fat, sipping tea*

*chewing ponderously*

"I give ush one-chanche-in-three."

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:24 PM (lq3Ak)

68 Is the Hasbro Decker life-sized?

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2014 04:25 PM (t6UXW)

69 Is the Hasbro Decker life-sized?

Posted by: garrett at April 26, 2014 08:25 PM (t6UXW)


Yes, but blessedly nipple-free.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:25 PM (8lmkt)

70 Touted as an adventure of a life time.... More like a window into hell..... I'm not cut out for this, my knees can't take the steep stairs everywhere. Lesson, have kids much earlier in life. Okay, I know bad attitude but it's my husband who should be doing this not me, hence the Cub Scout thing.

Posted by: lindafell on the USS Lexington at April 26, 2014 04:25 PM (7+uJ1)

71 Brought to you by Hasbro *** I giggle when I saw the big Hasbro pop up in the starting credits

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:26 PM (DmNpO)

72 lindafell, bless you for doing what you're doing and good luck.  it's probably gonna get real stinky . . .  we're here for you!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:27 PM (8lmkt)

73 Yes, but blessedly nipple-free. Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 08:25 PM (8lmkt) Wait... what?

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:27 PM (x3YFz)

74 tango nine: thought we were riffing on navy abbreviations tortured into acronimity. My bad.

Posted by: jwpaine at April 26, 2014 04:27 PM (68O4K)

75 62 Provoking Liam Neeson into becoming overprotective of his daughter. What could possibly go wrong? Posted by: Curate at April 26, 2014 08:23 PM (KXgbn) Liam Neeson is not killing anyone in this scene.

Posted by: From "Cinema Sins" at April 26, 2014 04:27 PM (WlWt+)

76 *lips full of lamb-fat, sipping tea* *chewing ponderously* "I give ush one-chanche-in-three." Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 08:24 PM (lq3Ak) I have never been able to decide if Sean Connery playing a Russian guy with a full Scots burr in Red October or a Spanish guy with a full Scots burr in Highlander is my favorite.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:27 PM (dMSj2)

77 Rihanna has absolutely horrible tastes in real estate: http://realestalker.blogspot.com/search?q=Rihanna&max-results=20&by-date=true

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 04:28 PM (8c12T)

78 oh, atc, Red October, cripes, one of the best movies ever!!!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:28 PM (8lmkt)

79 I'm not cut out for this, my knees can't take the steep stairs everywhere. Lesson, have kids much earlier in life. Okay, I know bad attitude but it's my husband who should be doing this not me, hence the Cub Scout thing. Posted by: lindafell on the USS Lexington at April 26, 2014 08:25 PM (7+uJ1) Sorry girl, belay my "bastard" comment. Replaces with "sorry, shoulda gone subs." /rib poke

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:29 PM (x3YFz)

80 Did I mention Brooklyn Decker? Please mention her early and often

Posted by: kbdabear at April 26, 2014 04:29 PM (aTXUx)

81 Lindafell , are they going to do ghost stories on the Lexington tonite? When our cubs went, the guy who did it told really good stories.

Posted by: Mole6 at April 26, 2014 04:29 PM (m0le6)

82 tango nine: thought we were riffing on navy abbreviations tortured into acronimity. My bad. Posted by: jwpaine at April 26, 2014 08:27 PM (68O4K) Naw my bad. Internets. NAVSPECWAR is bad enough. Navy comes up with some doosies.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:30 PM (x3YFz)

83 Rihanna has absolutely horrible tastes in real estate: *** The inside isn't bad but the outside is bizarre

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:30 PM (DmNpO)

84 ALIENS!

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:30 PM (x3YFz)

85 I met Col. Gadsen.  Amazing guy.  He was wearing a NY Giants Superbowl ring.  I told him cool but they got that after beating my Niners so not so cool.  He told me to put it on.  I did.

Posted by: Where're my ping pong balls at April 26, 2014 04:31 PM (YxaXw)

86
I have never been able to decide if Sean Connery playing a Russian guy with a full Scots burr in Red October or a Spanish guy with a full Scots burr in Highlander is my favorite.


"He puts one of yours in the hospital, you put one of his in the morgue!"

Posted by: Sean Connery playing an Irish Chicago Cop with a full Scots burr [/i] [/b] at April 26, 2014 04:31 PM (5ikDv)

87 And further delayed as MIL just called. Question, why does the satellite shoot lasers?

Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 04:31 PM (HDwDg)

88 85 I met Col. Gadsen. Amazing guy. He was wearing a NY Giants Superbowl ring. I told him cool but they got that after beating my Niners so not so cool. He told me to put it on. I did.

Posted by: Where're my ping pong balls at April 26, 2014 08:31 PM (YxaXw)


Sorry, Gadson not Gadsen.  Got flag on the brain.

Posted by: Where're my ping pong balls at April 26, 2014 04:32 PM (YxaXw)

89 Question, why does the satellite shoot lasers? *** I think it might be a visual representation of sound

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:33 PM (DmNpO)

90 oh, atc, Red October, cripes, one of the best movies ever!!! Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 08:28 PM (8lmkt) Oh it is, it really is. But I love that Connery is like oh fuck it I'm not even trying to pretend I have a Russian accent.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:33 PM (dMSj2)

91 Question, why does the satellite shoot lasers? Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 08:31 PM (HDwDg) pew pew pew?

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:33 PM (x3YFz)

92 I met Col. Gadsen. Amazing guy. He was wearing a NY Giants Superbowl ring. I told him cool but they got that after beating my Niners so not so cool. He told me to put it on. I did. *** Seems like a cool dude.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:33 PM (DmNpO)

93 OK kids, I'll be out here in the car. Enjoy the movie!

Posted by: kbdabear at April 26, 2014 04:34 PM (aTXUx)

94 Now is when things start getting really good and really effed up at the same time.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:35 PM (DmNpO)

95 Question, why does the satellite shoot lasers? Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 08:31 PM (HDwDg) This is not the kind of movie where you ask those kind of questions. You ask the kind of questions like why is this a movie set in Hawaii and there's only one scene of Brooklyn Decker in a bikini and why is Taylor Lautner still wearing a shirt? I switched over to the race where Clint Boyer's car just caught on fire, presumably as instant karma for what happened on the first lap, so I'm having to go by memory of the movie at the moment. Has Alex done his Sean Bean impression yet?

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:36 PM (dMSj2)

96 92 I met Col. Gadsen. Amazing guy. He was wearing a NY Giants Superbowl
ring. I told him cool but they got that after beating my Niners so not
so cool. He told me to put it on. I did.

***

Seems like a cool dude.

I only talked to him for 10 minutes or so, but 2nd hand have heard that he's a great guy.  My impression was that he has a calm but "felt" presence, a leader-type.

Posted by: Where're my ping pong balls at April 26, 2014 04:37 PM (YxaXw)

97 This movie has so many technical problems that it must have been written by a Democrat. The main character enlists (meaning, he's an enlisted man, not an officer) to avoid going to jail. Five years later, he's a Lieutenant Commander (O-4) -- that means he must be a superstar. Instead, he's on the verge of being canned.

And let's not forget the scene where four burly guys struggle to carry a 16-inch shell about half the length of the ship. Said shell weighs 1,920 lbs -- if it's a high-explosive round, and it probably is. If it's an armor-piercing round, the weight goes up to 2,700 lbs.

And you CAN NOT drop anchor on a speeding battleship and get it to "powerslide."

Good thing it's so damned entertaining, or it would be a complete atrocity.

The single best scene: the reawakening montage to AC/DC's "Thunderstruck."

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 04:37 PM (BcAM8)

98 A science fiction writer takes on Battleship: http://www.jamescambias.com/blog/2013/04/battleship-part-1-not-stupid-enough.html

Posted by: Trimegistus at April 26, 2014 04:37 PM (r9ezw)

99 Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:33 PM (DmNpO) Probably but the whole CGI sequence with the satellite is hilariously bad.

Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 04:37 PM (HDwDg)

100 Stinky, yes. But the showers are even scarier.

Posted by: lindafell on the USS Lexington at April 26, 2014 04:38 PM (7+uJ1)

101 You ask the kind of questions like why is this a movie set in Hawaii and there's only one scene of Brooklyn Decker in a bikini and why is Taylor Lautner still wearing a shirt? *** Why is Skarsgard wearing a shirt at all?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:38 PM (DmNpO)

102 Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 08:37 PM (BcAM

OMG, I feel like I am actually watching the actual movie!!!!  Bless you, Joe Nobody, that was just great.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:38 PM (8lmkt)

103 "I have never been able to decide if Sean Connery playing a Russian guy with a full Scots burr in Red October or a Spanish guy with a full Scots burr in Highlander is my favorite."
Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 08:27 PM (dMSj2)

It is decidedly a "Two-Star" difference.  Red October gets 4.5 stars.  Highlander gets 2.5 stars.  I've discussed this to the point of madness, in the past.

*Notedly, I regret standing in the middle of the road screaming, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" back in '97.

It wasn't the action, nor the statement, in-and-of-itself.  It was the choice of Cleveland Indians batting helmet, codpiece and leg-warmers that defined the evening.

'Shrooms are a helluva drug.

-Don't Drink Tequila, neither.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:38 PM (lq3Ak)

104 Probably but the whole CGI sequence with the satellite is hilariously bad. ** Dude. You ain't seen nothing yet!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:39 PM (DmNpO)

105 The single best scene: the reawakening montage to AC/DC's "Thunderstruck." *** Oh yeah!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:40 PM (DmNpO)

106 I've discussed this to the point of madness, in the past.

It's the moron way, Slap. 

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:40 PM (8lmkt)

107 77 Rihanna has absolutely horrible tastes in real estate: http://realestalker.blogspot.com/search?q=Rihanna&max-results=20&by-date=true Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 08:28 PM (8c12T) This is Rhianna. She was probably drunk, high, and suffering from a concussion when she bought it.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, formerly MrCaniac at April 26, 2014 04:40 PM (HxSXm)

108 So you are traveling across the galaxy and you decide to have thousands of bumps and lines on the exterior of your ship?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:41 PM (DmNpO)

109 Why is Skarsgard wearing a shirt at all? Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:38 PM (DmNpO) Most cromulent point indeed. Slapweasel, I refuse to believe that tequila was involved in that event. You were wearing clothes, at least by certain definitions of clothing, and, as we all know, tequila makes your clothes fall off.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:41 PM (dMSj2)

110 And you CAN NOT drop anchor on a speeding battleship and get it to "powerslide." Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 08:37 PM (BcAM US Navy meets Fast and Furious.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:42 PM (x3YFz)

111 > If I had an idea a week or so in advance of what is coming on a network channel, that would be a great idea. Do you know how to find that out? Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse 1. Time zones screw that up. 2. This is a pretty good online tv guide http://ww2.titantv.com/default.aspx

Posted by: Comrade Arthur at April 26, 2014 04:42 PM (h53OH)

112 "It's the moron way, Slap."
Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 08:40 PM (8lmkt)

I know.  I still regret the leg-warmers.  Given a reprieve?

...I'd have gone with knee-socks.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:43 PM (lq3Ak)

113 Slap, my mother actually knitted me some legwarmers back in the day.  I'm not sure I ever wore 'em, they were kinda ghey.  They might still be in the ski drawer which I am afraid to even open.  Love knee sox but after 50, you want to dial that shit back lest you look ridiculous. 

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:45 PM (8lmkt)

114 BTW, they have the coolest weapons ever.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:45 PM (DmNpO)

115 "1 mil offset?" on a deck gun?

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:45 PM (x3YFz)

116 SOOOOOO not only has the advanced life-form decided that leap-frogging is the best way to travel on water, they seemingly have no way to retract their cables.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:47 PM (DmNpO)

117 You do have to love the phalanx chain gun. Want.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:47 PM (x3YFz)

118 Love knee sox but after 50, you want to dial that shit back lest you look ridiculous. Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 08:45 PM (8lmkt) So I guess Peaches in a naughty school girl outfit isn't happening?

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 26, 2014 04:47 PM (oFCZn)

119 OT, but only slightly since it's a movie thread, George Clooney got engaged.    I knew his first wife, which hardly anybody knows he had.  Guessing Steve Wynn will not be invited to the wedding.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:48 PM (8lmkt)

120 Anybody watching NASCAR?

Posted by: oc joe at April 26, 2014 04:48 PM (hqVUe)

121 That formation of unidentified aircraft being picked up by the radar station in the Hawaiian mountains is probably just that flight of B-17's that they've been told to expect.

Posted by: Curate at April 26, 2014 04:48 PM (KXgbn)

122 SOOOOOO not only has the advanced life-form decided that leap-frogging is the best way to travel on water, they seemingly have no way to retract their cables. Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:47 PM (DmNpO) Also they can't just drop some relay stations on the Moon or some such.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:48 PM (dMSj2)

123 So I guess Peaches in a naughty school girl outfit isn't happening?

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 26, 2014 08:47 PM (oFCZn)


Not in any kind of decent lighting situation . . .

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:49 PM (8lmkt)

124 They don't call him Andy Rod Dick for nuthin'

Posted by: Beto at April 26, 2014 04:49 PM (gmrH5)

125 3 SEALS, pop-up polo shirts and beards and this would be over.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 04:49 PM (x3YFz)

126 123 So I guess Peaches in a naughty school girl outfit isn't happening? Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at April 26, 2014 08:47 PM (oFCZn) Not in any kind of decent lighting situation . . . Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 08:49 PM (8lmkt) Chuckles

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at April 26, 2014 04:50 PM (HVff2)

127 Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 08:41 PM (dMSj2)

Ma'am?

...I've had my day in court.  I've tried to re-define the past.  While I may have chosen knee-socks over leg-warmers, choices were made.

Tequila Danced With the Devil and won.  I am not the sole arbiter in this instance.

Local law enforcement still calls it "The Incident" to this very day.  And that happened twelve days ago.

I can erase my past insomuch as I can erase History Itself.

I find errors, ma'am.  I strive for "better".  For my seven wives and all thirty-three children.

I was no good in the NBA.  No-Sir-ree-BOB.

I can only ask questions and strive for the answers in Obama's America.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:51 PM (lq3Ak)

128 It wasn't the action, nor the statement, in-and-of-itself. It was the choice of Cleveland Indians batting helmet, codpiece and leg-warmers that defined the evening.

That was real?  Huh, I just figured another day, another flashback.

Posted by: DaveA[/i][/b][/s] at April 26, 2014 04:51 PM (DL2i+)

129 The projectiles that look like white pegs and then turn red before they blow up is a nice touch.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 04:51 PM (BcAM8)

130 >>>I have never been able to decide if Sean Connery playing a Russian 
guy with a full Scots burr in Red October or a Spanish guy with a full 
Scots burr in Highlander is my favorite.<<<



Wait til you see the movie where I'm a guy with a full Scots burr playing in your mother, Trebek. 

Posted by: Sean Connery at April 26, 2014 04:51 PM (IlmuV)

131 OT, but for anyone who didn't get enough peeps, Target is practically giving them away, I got 9 of the little buggers today for 59 cents!!  Yummo!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:51 PM (8lmkt)

132 oh, wait, not 9, 12!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:51 PM (8lmkt)

133 So they are here to take over the planet yet they decide to kill only those who attack them directly?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:52 PM (DmNpO)

134 Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 08:51 PM (lq3Ak)

just when I think I could not possibly hold you in any higher esteem, you  move the goalposts, Slap.  Nicely played!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 04:53 PM (8lmkt)

135 Here come my favorite weapons!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:53 PM (DmNpO)

136 So they are here to take over the planet yet they decide to kill only those who attack them directly?

They're polite that way.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 04:53 PM (BcAM8)

137 Then they attack the air base and kill indiscriminately.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:54 PM (DmNpO)

138 "Love knee sox but after 50, you want to dial that shit back lest you look ridiculous."
Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 08:45 PM (8lmkt)

Bless your mother, ma'am.  She did her finest, as I'm sure we both acknowledge.

As far as the "choice" is concerned.  I've done what I've done and I cannot change the past. 

I don't mind "looking ridiculous", anymore.  As tribute.

I find it liberating in its own "Knit-Christmas Sweater, No Pants"; sort-of-way.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 04:55 PM (lq3Ak)

139 Then they attack the air base and kill indiscriminately. Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:54 PM (DmNpO) *taps foot* You're applying logic and reason to the movie again. Stop that.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 04:55 PM (dMSj2)

140 *taps foot* You're applying logic and reason to the movie again. Stop that. **** I LOVE all the goofy stuff in the movie.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 04:56 PM (DmNpO)

141 Why didn't the Aliens just take Mars and turn it into a casino? It would have been win-win.

Posted by: eman at April 26, 2014 04:58 PM (AO9UG)

142 And just like in the horror movies, someone checks on the suspicious noise.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:00 PM (DmNpO)

143 The fakest part about this movie is how the aliens are the bad guys and the U.S. military are the good guys.  Ruined it for me.

Posted by: liberal viewer at April 26, 2014 05:01 PM (YxaXw)

144 The fakest part about this movie is how the aliens are the bad guys and the U.S. military are the good guys. Ruined it for me. *** hehehehehe

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:01 PM (DmNpO)

145 the aliens are the bad guys and the U.S. military are the good guys. Ruined it for me.

Posted by: liberal viewer at April 26, 2014 09:01 PM (YxaXw)


we call that "mission accomplished!"

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:02 PM (8lmkt)

146 movie review for this weekend. 1) Thank's for doing that in my mouth. 2) I didn't mean to do that in your mouth. 3) God? God? Ya, ok.

Posted by: tinfoil baby at April 26, 2014 05:02 PM (hqVUe)

147 The aliens just came here out of love!

Posted by: Jeb Bush at April 26, 2014 05:03 PM (IlmuV)

148 "aliens have landed!" "let's not tell the guys on military maneuvers" (still behind)

Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 05:04 PM (HDwDg)

149 Look! They're just like our guys. They won't leave one of their own behind.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:04 PM (DmNpO)

150 BH liked how the two chiefs were standing together by the alien there.

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 05:04 PM (5i94q)

151 The aliens came here at the bidding if their Scandi masters.

Posted by: eman at April 26, 2014 05:04 PM (AO9UG)

152 The aliens just came here out of love!

Posted by: Jeb Bush at April 26, 2014 09:03 PM (IlmuV)


It's a cookbook!!!!!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:05 PM (8lmkt)

153 Why do the aliens look lik power rangers

Posted by: crunchberry at April 26, 2014 05:05 PM (oIIni)

154 That guy's gonna have a headache

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:06 PM (DmNpO)

155 Why do the aliens look lik power rangers *** You were expecting ET?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:06 PM (DmNpO)

156 "Why do the aliens look lik power rangers"
Posted by: crunchberry at April 26, 2014 09:05 PM (oIIni)

Because you have typos and refuse to add punctuation.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:07 PM (lq3Ak)

157 ...and you touch yourself at night.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:07 PM (lq3Ak)

158 You have to remove your brain and stash it in the fridge for safe-keeping in order to truly enjoy this movie,

Posted by: eman at April 26, 2014 05:08 PM (AO9UG)

159 The Swiss Army knife hands are a nice touch

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:08 PM (DmNpO)

160 Or, we can all download the film from the internet and watch on your computer or transfer it to a usb drive and watch it on your flat screen. It only takes about 30 minutes to download a flix and no, you won't get arrested. This flix is all over the internet. I just forgot to do it in advance.

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 05:10 PM (8c12T)

161 >>>It's a cookbook!!!!!<<<


Yes, love is the secret ingredient.

Posted by: Alien chef at April 26, 2014 05:11 PM (IlmuV)

162 Yes, love is the secret ingredient. *** Sprinkle in a little understanding and a generous helping of tolerance

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:12 PM (DmNpO)

163 Those scouts have some bony legs

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:12 PM (DmNpO)

164 "Mahalo, mother(boom)"

I have to wonder if the 5"/62 Mark 45 Mark 4 gun has ever been used to kill a single person at a range of one foot before.

It's remarkably effective...

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:12 PM (BcAM8)

165 Sprinkle in a little understanding and a generous helping of tolerance

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 09:12 PM (DmNpO)


Don't forget the fairness sauce!

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:12 PM (8lmkt)

166 I do love how when the crew realizes the screw up is in charge their response is oh fuck we are going to die instead of the usual yeah yeah stick it to the man!

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 05:13 PM (dMSj2)

167 I do love how when the crew realizes the screw up is in charge their response is oh fuck we are going to die instead of the usual yeah yeah stick it to the man! *** Hopper's in charge?! We're all gonna die!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:13 PM (DmNpO)

168 "It's a cookbook!!!!!"
Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 09:05 PM (8lmkt)

And a Tax.

Posted by: Judge Roberts at April 26, 2014 05:14 PM (lq3Ak)

169 Ohhh! An extinction-level event

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:14 PM (DmNpO)

170 OK, we just unleashed the ultimate weapon against the aliens... Obama's lecturing them.

If this movie was like real life, that would just end it right there. Instead, we have to drag a battleship out of retirement.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:15 PM (BcAM8)

171 your books are dangerous mr. wordsworth

Posted by: tinfoil baby at April 26, 2014 05:15 PM (hqVUe)

172 OK, we just unleashed the ultimate weapon against the aliens... Obama's lecturing them. If this movie was like real life, that would just end it right there. Instead, we have to drag a battleship out of retirement. *** Send in the hashtags!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:15 PM (DmNpO)

173 Sorry, been watching on TCM the 1946 French version of Beauty and the Beast while writing.  Tres belle. 

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 05:16 PM (CWIQ2)

174 OK, we just unleashed the ultimate weapon against the aliens... Obama's lecturing them.

Yeah, we're not taking your calls right now.

Posted by: Vladi P. at April 26, 2014 05:17 PM (8lmkt)

175 "Don't forget the fairness sauce!"
Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 09:12 PM (8lmkt)

-One part Social Justice.
-One part Love.
-One part submissive rollover.
-One part Bowing Down.

=Four Parts Defeated Failure.

*Remember to accept a Dictator's book!

Posted by: Judge Roberts at April 26, 2014 05:17 PM (lq3Ak)

176 Those tire weapons were stolen from transformers weren't they? Also my wife is confused why they won't kill the kid, but they'll wreck the highway and kill people.

Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 05:17 PM (HDwDg)

177 Sock Fail!

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:18 PM (lq3Ak)

178 Those tire weapons were stolen from transformers weren't they? Also my wife is confused why they won't kill the kid, but they'll wreck the highway and kill people. *** they also only target the destroyers which fire on them

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:18 PM (DmNpO)

179 Sounds like what they need is a Sternly Worded Memo.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:19 PM (8lmkt)

180 As soon as I  draw a red line this invasion (and movie) is over. 

Posted by: SCOAMF at April 26, 2014 05:19 PM (IlmuV)

181 Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 09:18 PM (DmNpO) And the highway pillars

Posted by: tsrblke (tablet) at April 26, 2014 05:20 PM (HDwDg)

182 Mutherfucker has a SWO and ESWS. Drives me nuts.

Posted by: Buck Farack, Gentleman Adventurer at April 26, 2014 05:21 PM (Nk6GS)

183 "Sounds like what they need is a Sternly Worded Memo."
Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 09:19 PM (8lmkt)

Written in "No Uncertain Terms", minus the Uncertain Terms.

-Unfortunately-Worded *Reset Button* included.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:21 PM (lq3Ak)

184 Battleship II: Moar T and A for Dad

Posted by: eman at April 26, 2014 05:22 PM (AO9UG)

185 OK, we just unleashed the ultimate weapon against the aliens... Obama's lecturing them.

If this movie was like real life, that would just end it right there. Instead, we have to drag a battleship out of retirement.

***

Send in the hashtags!

I choked with laughter!

Posted by: CaliforniaGirl at April 26, 2014 05:22 PM (l+qoZ)

186 Ohhh! An extinction-level event Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 09:14 PM (DmNpO) Again with the taunting of Happy Fun Alex Actually a double feature of this and Battle: Los Angeles is fun because in both of them the US armed forces are portrayed as the unabashed good guys.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 05:22 PM (dMSj2)

187 These aliens only attacked after watching Independence Day movie trailers on YouTube 

Posted by: Susan Rice at April 26, 2014 05:22 PM (IlmuV)

188 179 Sounds like what they need is a Sternly Worded Memo. Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 09:19 PM (8lmkt) And a #hashtag

Posted by: Thrawn at April 26, 2014 05:22 PM (WlWt+)

189 There are so many things wrong with this movie technically that you just have to sit back and say "fuck it, this is AWESOME!" and enjoy it. 

I was lucky enough to perform a re-enlistment ceremony on board the USS Missouri in 1991 when she was tied up at Bremerton.  Standing there with my hand on the barrel of one of her aft turret 16 inch guns while swearing in a sailor for another 4 year hitch, in the same place where the Japanese signed the surrender documents at the end of WWII, was one of my proudest moments.

I love this movie, and serving in the Navy was one of the best things I ever did in life.  Even as a lowly supply officer on a supply ship.  There is something about being at sea that cannot be described.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2014 05:22 PM (/7Zv0)

190 Not watching because I forgot to rent it and whatever.  Besides, I remember it all , as if it happened only yesterday.  (plays Steinman riff)

Why only fleeting shots of Brooklyn walking?   Because she walks kind of funny, ya know?

Is that Andy's fault?

Posted by: Troll Feeder at April 26, 2014 05:23 PM (ecz1I)

191 I would have participated in this, but Battleship is such a terrible, terrible movie that I couldn't bring myself to do it. Sit through Battleship one more time or do anything else? I'll do anything else, thank you very much.

Posted by: David at April 26, 2014 05:23 PM (pGKt9)

192 Why only fleeting shots of Brooklyn walking? Because she walks kind of funny, ya know? *** She's kind of pigeon-toed

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:24 PM (DmNpO)

193 Phalanx FTW!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:24 PM (BcAM8)

194 Decker is udderly enchanting.

Posted by: Vlad the Barbarian at April 26, 2014 05:25 PM (5fSr7)

195 And here's where we learn that the weak link in a unit can jeopardize the entire operation

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:25 PM (DmNpO)

196 Who knew I liked pigeons?  Something new every day.

Posted by: Troll Feeder at April 26, 2014 05:26 PM (ecz1I)

197 Notice how when the aliens put away their guns it kind of looks like a gunslinger reholstering his guns?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:26 PM (DmNpO)

198 "Actually a double feature of this and Battle: Los Angeles is fun because in both of them the US armed forces are portrayed as the unabashed good guys."
Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 09:22 PM (dMSj2)

I went into that movie with the same ideas that Hollywood would be a mostly-vinegar douche.

Pleasant surprise!

It was actually decent.  (I'm a SUCKER for Super Hero Movies), sooooo.....  HEROES!

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:27 PM (lq3Ak)

199 What an amazing coincidence! The two best shots aboard are also the highest-ranking officers!

And who'da thunk that the "full broadside" of a Burke would be actually firing dead ahead?

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:30 PM (BcAM8)

200 And who'da thunk that the "full broadside" of a Burke would be actually firing dead ahead?

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 09:30 PM (BcAM


I would do anything for love, but I won't do that.  oh, wait . . .

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:32 PM (8lmkt)

201 OK, that just blew "willing suspension of disbelief" out of the water -- Rihanna was the first to realize that Giant Spinny Blades Of Death don't turn too good, so to avoid them don't run away, just get out of the way.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:32 PM (BcAM8)

202 You do have to love the phalanx chain gun.

Want.

Posted by: tangonine at April 26, 2014 08:47 PM (x3YFz)



Called the Close In Weapon System, or CIWS.  Looks like a dude pissing into the water, thus the nick-name "Sea Whiz".  20 mm Gat and a radar that tracks each bullet's path and corrects immediately to the target.  Saw one shoot down a Standard Missile once.  Epic.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2014 05:33 PM (/7Zv0)

203 OK, that just blew "willing suspension of disbelief" out of the water -- Rihanna was the first to realize that Giant Spinny Blades Of Death don't turn too good, so to avoid them don't run away, just get out of the way. **** I LOOOOOOOVE this scene! The grinding balls o' death!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:33 PM (DmNpO)

204 Well, I love to look at the ships .

Posted by: awkward davies at April 26, 2014 05:34 PM (whqez)

205 THIS is where the real suspension of disbelief comes into play

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:34 PM (DmNpO)

206 OK, super smart captains are on ship sinking by the bow. So instead of jumping off the side, the climb all the way to the stern so they can dive through the still-spinning propellers (AKA the American Giant Spinny Blades Of Death) to survive.

Even Rihanna isn't that stupid.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:35 PM (BcAM8)

207 one of my movie pet peeves is in Aliens, if everyone had simply gone outside they would have not had as many problems with aliens coming at them through the walls, ceiling, and floor. shoot em at 100 yards.

Posted by: yankeefifth at April 26, 2014 05:35 PM (rDidD)

208 Attention Moronettes: Taylor Kitsch is now in a wet T-shirt.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:36 PM (BcAM8)

209 OK, super smart captains are on ship sinking by the bow. So instead of jumping off the side, the climb all the way to the stern so they can dive through the still-spinning propellers (AKA the American Giant Spinny Blades Of Death) to survive. Even Rihanna isn't that stupid. *** YES! Jump 100' or so into the water full of sharp pointy metal things

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:36 PM (DmNpO)

210 Actually a double feature of this and Battle: Los Angeles is fun because in both of them the US armed forces are portrayed as the unabashed good guys.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 09:22 PM (dMSj2)



I love Battle LA.  To me it is about as realistic as an alien invasion movie can be and the small unit detail and action looks pretty authentic. 

Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2014 05:37 PM (/7Zv0)

211 one of my movie pet peeves is in Aliens, if everyone had simply gone outside they would have not had as many problems with aliens coming at them through the walls, ceiling, and floor. shoot em at 100 yards.

Wasn't the atmosphere unbreathable? At least away from the colony?

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:37 PM (BcAM8)

212 Cue the AC/DC montage!

Bunk!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:37 PM (BcAM8)

213 Notice the old guy in the CIC is wearing a "USS NORTH CAROLINA BB-55" hat?

And LOVE when Rihanna shows up in fire control.

"Been working on a destroyer, haven't you?"

"Yes, sir."

"Then you ready to play with the big boys?"

"OH, YES, SIR!"

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:40 PM (BcAM8)

214 I didn't like the "Dark" Super Hero Movie with the big, blue, radioactive naked guy.  The one with "Rorschach".  Even though I sort-of liked Rorschach.

That movie took itself WAAY too seriously.

I didn't see it as "giving credit to the viewer", at all.

Much of it was a hand-held oddity.

If I'm not "getting it", put me to some knowledge.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:42 PM (lq3Ak)

215 Does Capt. Queeg know they have his Grinding Balls of Death?  And his strawberry ice cream?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 05:42 PM (CWIQ2)

216 Not watching, but you're alright NDH! Good idea. Y'all have fun kiddos.

Posted by: dogfish at April 26, 2014 05:42 PM (nsOJa)

217 BATTLESHIP POWERSLIDE!!!!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:43 PM (BcAM8)

218 Thank ya, Dogfish

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:44 PM (DmNpO)

219 BATTLESHIP POWERSLIDE!!!! *** It's hilarious!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:44 PM (DmNpO)

220 Do not look at drudge...

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 05:45 PM (8c12T)

221 one of my movie pet peeves is in Aliens, if everyone had simply gone outside they would have not had as many problems with aliens coming at them through the walls, ceiling, and floor. shoot em at 100 yards. Wasn't the atmosphere unbreathable? At least away from the colony? Posted by: Joe Nobody at April I had never heard that, which does not mean a lot here, but they were walking around without masks and the pilots were, unwisely, sitting around in their landing craft with the doors open.

Posted by: yankeefifth at April 26, 2014 05:46 PM (rDidD)

222 I'm gonna have to re-watch the battle scene again, but I don't think I saw the 5"/38 guns or the Tomahawk missiles firing, but I did see the 20mms (which, I think, were removed) and the Phalanx going at it. That's a whole lotta Heavy Metal going downrange...

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:46 PM (BcAM8)

223 You guys are awesome. I may have to break down and rent this.

Posted by: Piercello at April 26, 2014 05:47 PM (jJ97i)

224 Do not look at drudge...

Posted by: Commissar Pug at April 26, 2014 09:45 PM (8c12T)


fuckin' link doesn't work anyway, tried twice, damn their eyes.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:47 PM (8lmkt)

225 A battleship can "Power-Slide", given the right Movie conditions.  Most frigates are only capable of a "wakeful turn".

Destroyers can shove your house against the nearest hill.

In the case of most "Second-World" countries, their Chicken-Haulers are capable of not only carrying multitudes of poultry, but usually "Pull A One-Eighty" at the first sign of trouble.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:48 PM (lq3Ak)

226 I wasn't very impressed with either Battleship or Battle LA, but at least they weren't conspicuously hostile toward the military.
"Wasn't the atmosphere unbreathable? At least away from the colony?"
They didn't seem adversely affected when the dropship crashed over them and they had to hoof it to the base.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at April 26, 2014 05:49 PM (zfY+H)

227 I'm counting five guys carrying a two-ton shell 500 feet, through doors with 12" thresholds. Another miracle for ObamaCare and Michelle's food plans!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:49 PM (BcAM8)

228 BATTLESHIP POWERSLIDE!!!!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 09:43 PM (BcAM



experiencing a rare moment of envy here . . .

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:49 PM (8lmkt)

229 LV-438? was being Terra-formed when the colony went silent.  So you could I guess have breathable air but still terrible weather because the atmosphere is still trying to find balance.  Now Prometheus truly set the standards for horrible movie with people dieing in stupid ways, more stupid than the grunts tossing nuclear hand grenades in the first Starship Troopers movie.

And AlextheChick, I just thought of a great way to delay rescue in this story I am writing.  The aliens are invading so these people are on their own.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 05:49 PM (CWIQ2)

230 Giant Spinny Balls Of Death II: The Electric Bugaloo!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:50 PM (BcAM8)

231 You guys are awesome. I may have to break down and rent this. *** I'm not exaggerating when I say I've probably watched it 20 times.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:50 PM (DmNpO)

232 Plastic Bugs to the mofo rescue!

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:51 PM (BcAM8)

233 And AlextheChick, I just thought of a great way to delay rescue in this story I am writing. The aliens are invading so these people are on their own. Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 09:49 PM (CWIQ2) Remember, the key to surviving any situation is to go investigate the scary noise all alone.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 05:51 PM (dMSj2)

234 "experiencing a rare moment of envy here . . ."
Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 09:49 PM (8lmkt)

With all due respect to you and all the ettes?  My penis can't even do that in a bathtub.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:52 PM (lq3Ak)

235 Is there nothing a Jeep can't do?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:52 PM (DmNpO)

236 The Drudge Report headline has a me feeling like Charlton Heston at the end of Planet of the Apes.


YOU MANIACS!!!!!!!

You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!

Posted by: Kreplach at April 26, 2014 05:52 PM (Xkr8I)

237 That retired Army Colonel's legs gave better performances than half the cast.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:53 PM (BcAM8)

238 I'm not exaggerating when I say I've probably watched it 20 times. Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 09:50 PM (DmNpO) *fist bump* I'm actually watching the race but I still can tell you exactly what's going on in the movie.

Posted by: alexthechick - Oh save us mighty SMOD at April 26, 2014 05:53 PM (dMSj2)

239 With all due respect to you and all the ettes? My penis can't even do that in a bathtub.

It's not the meat, it's the motion.

Oh, lord, thy sea is so great, and my craft so small...

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:54 PM (BcAM8)

240 "Is there nothing a Jeep can't do?"
 Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 09:52 PM (DmNpO)

How did you guess my nickname for it?!?  *HAH!*

...for a million damn dollars.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 05:54 PM (lq3Ak)

241 Funny you should say that AlextheChick, it does involve mutated insects.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 05:56 PM (CWIQ2)

242 Is there nothing a Jeep can't do?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 09:52 PM (DmNpO)


Nothing whatsoever.  Unless you are talking about retaining fluids after the judicious application of 1250 bucks.  Don't ask me how I know.

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 05:56 PM (8lmkt)

243 "Do not look at Drudge..."  But I never listen do I?  Oh, when will I learn?  *sigh* A bit of annoyance in the middle of my weekend.

Posted by: CaliforniaGirl at April 26, 2014 05:56 PM (l+qoZ)

244 Let me guess Gaylord Focker un-friended Vlad?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 05:57 PM (CWIQ2)

245 And then they roll the credits to the anti-war song "Fortunate Son." At least they butchered it with edits and drops...

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:57 PM (BcAM8)

246 Nothing whatsoever. Unless you are talking about retaining fluids after the judicious application of 1250 bucks. Don't ask me how I know. *** I'm afraid to ask.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 05:57 PM (DmNpO)

247 Who is mcmorris Rodgers from WA state. Note they were talking to an immigration group

Posted by: Thunderb at April 26, 2014 05:58 PM (zOTsN)

248 Back to 1:36 and the AC/DC montage... the finest two minutes in film history. The punch in the turd bowl, if you will.

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 05:59 PM (BcAM8)

249 Battleship is cheesy and predictable... But I've watched it like twenty times too.....  Still  like it...


Posted by: fixerupper at April 26, 2014 05:59 PM (IrLKP)

250 The old guys get the best lines. At least that's fair.

"What do you need, son?"

"Purring like a kitten."

"What the hell you gonna do, stand there and stare at me all day? Get your goddamn eyes on the spotter!"

Posted by: Joe Nobody at April 26, 2014 06:00 PM (BcAM8)

251 I've watched The Green Lantern three times.  Like I said... I'm a sucker for Super Heroes.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 06:01 PM (lq3Ak)

252 An enjoyable film, as long as you leave your brain at the door and have a full bucket of popcorn. Solid B film material.

Posted by: Sean at April 26, 2014 06:01 PM (t+uGE)

253 OK, who here has rented this movie online for 24 hours (and are going to watch it again before the 24 hours is up?)

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 06:02 PM (5i94q)

254 That's just a bad film is what it is.

And it's not of the it's so bad it's good variety.

But then again I walked out of Inception so what do I know.

Posted by: Kreplach at April 26, 2014 06:02 PM (Xkr8I)

255 Is it over?

Posted by: CDR M at April 26, 2014 06:02 PM (LsJl8)

256 It is over, CDR M.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 06:03 PM (lq3Ak)

257 Is it over? *** yep

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 06:03 PM (DmNpO)

258 Oops. I'm late. Can we start over?

And what's this about the Drudge headline?

[clicks over to Drudge] *clutches heart*

Geez, how can we win if the GOP keeps putting claymore mines under our pillows?

Posted by: Timothy S. Carlson at April 26, 2014 06:04 PM (GpaFp)

259 So, do we do this again?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 06:04 PM (DmNpO)

260 Ok, next film has to be a film that is recognized to be a classic.

HARDBODIES!

There I said it.

Posted by: Kreplach at April 26, 2014 06:04 PM (Xkr8I)

261 So what is next week's movie?

The Green Slime?  The Creeping Unknown?  Or Spaceballs?  Maybe Lifeforce?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at April 26, 2014 06:04 PM (CWIQ2)

262 259 So, do we do this again? Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 10:04 PM (DmNpO) What do you have in mind for round 2?

Posted by: Sean at April 26, 2014 06:05 PM (t+uGE)

263 So what is next week's movie? The Green Slime? The Creeping Unknown? Or Spaceballs? Maybe Lifeforce? ** I'll research what is easily obtained and put up a poll sometime in the next couple of weeks.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 06:05 PM (DmNpO)

264 262 259 So, do we do this again? Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 10:04 PM (DmNpO) What do you have in mind for round 2? Posted by: Sean at April 26, 2014 10:05 PM (t+uGE) Resident Evil movie marathon, .

Posted by: Thrawn at April 26, 2014 06:06 PM (WlWt+)

265 Geez, how can we win if the GOP keeps putting claymore mines under our pillows?

Posted by: Timothy S. Carlson at April 26, 2014 10:04 PM (GpaFp)


Let us know the second you figure that out, eh?

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 06:06 PM (8lmkt)

266 What do you have in mind for round 2? *** I'll put up a poll with a few flicks to choose from. I'm thinking along the lines of Caddyshack, Animal House, Hot Fuzz, Office Space, Spaceballs, etc... something along those lines.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (DmNpO)

267 NDH, yes we should do this again!

Posted by: Steck at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (5i94q)

268 As long as I don't have to wear pants?

We can watch "Desperately Seeking Susan", for all I care.

Posted by: Slapweasel at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (lq3Ak)

269 haha, ont's  up and you can't be first! 

Posted by: Peaches at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (8lmkt)

270 ONT up

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (DmNpO)

271 Flesh Gordon for the next round.

BTW: there's another headline on Drudge: "Scientists Build 'Off Switch' For The Brain". I think they are testing it on the GOP leadership.

Posted by: Timothy S. Carlson at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (GpaFp)

272 I have enjoyed watching this movie many times.  Sometimes the willing suspension of disbelief is the shortest path to a fun cinematic experience.

Taylor Kitsch's other great opus/flop was John Carter of Mars, which I also enjoyed.

Iron Sky is in the same genre.  The Downfall knockoff scene from that movie is one of my all-time favorites.

Posted by: CQD at April 26, 2014 06:07 PM (tcvYF)

273 Resident Evil movie marathon ** NO!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 06:08 PM (DmNpO)

274 Hot Fuzz would be awesome. Actually, all of those ideas are fantastic.

Posted by: Sean at April 26, 2014 06:10 PM (t+uGE)

275 Top Gun next week. Or Stripes.

Posted by: Glad the Ukraine Impailer at April 26, 2014 06:10 PM (tskoR)

276 @266

A nice wild card film could be a little film called The Wanderers about gangs of the 50's in the Bronx.

Stars Ken Wahl and Karen Allen in came out in 1979.

It was filmed pretty much where I grew up, in fact most of the interior scenes were filmed in my apartment building.


Posted by: Kreplach at April 26, 2014 06:11 PM (Xkr8I)

277 Howard the Duck!

Posted by: Sir Bedevere at April 26, 2014 06:12 PM (YxaXw)

278 189 There are so many things wrong with this movie technically that you just have to sit back and say "fuck it, this is AWESOME!" and enjoy it. I was lucky enough to perform a re-enlistment ceremony on board the USS Missouri in 1991 when she was tied up at Bremerton. Standing there with my hand on the barrel of one of her aft turret 16 inch guns while swearing in a sailor for another 4 year hitch, in the same place where the Japanese signed the surrender documents at the end of WWII, was one of my proudest moments. I love this movie, and serving in the Navy was one of the best things I ever did in life. Even as a lowly supply officer on a supply ship. There is something about being at sea that cannot be described. Posted by: Sharkman at April 26, 2014 09:22 PM (/7Zv0) Amen. My last reenlistment (2006) was at turret two on the Wisconsin.

Posted by: Buck Farack, Gentleman Adventurer at April 26, 2014 06:12 PM (Nk6GS)

279 Actually if you want to have more films that are so bad they are good you might want to try Ishtar, which I actually liked.

Posted by: Kreplach at April 26, 2014 06:13 PM (Xkr8I)

280 So you've given some eye candy for the guys. And for the women, but where's the battleship porn? Seriously, priorities!

Posted by: Bill at April 26, 2014 06:18 PM (iWR9S)

281 When I first saw Battleship, I had the depressing realization that we would never get a great film like Alien ever again.

Because all these movies would have to begin the way Battleship did--a completely pointless and irrelevant bit about how our hero came to be where he is. 

For Alien, we'd see Tom Skerrit's character as a child, looking up at the stars; as a young man, buying his first used spaceship; arguing with some boss figure in a shipping company; and when he died, we'd have a slow-motion montage of all that superimposed as the alien reached for him and screamed.

Battleship went a long way toward believe that movies were pretty much dead.

Posted by: Null at April 26, 2014 06:19 PM (xjpRj)

282 So, do we do this again?
Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse

Needy, I don't know if you've seen this site but it's a good reference for this kind of thing:

www.canistream.it

It's a database of movies and TV shows that are available on the different streaming services. 

Posted by: weft cut-loop at April 26, 2014 06:23 PM (ujux6)

283 The best part of the movie was watching the old veterans take their ship out for one last run: "Oh, boy, someone's gonna kiss the donkey now..."

Posted by: richard mcenroe at April 26, 2014 08:00 PM (XO6WW)

Posted by: richard mcenroe at April 26, 2014 08:04 PM (XO6WW)

285 51 I'm on an aircraft carrier, USS Lexington, does that count? Okay, it's retired, and a memorial now but I have to sleep on it with a bunch of strangers and about 200 hyper cub scouts. Yeah, I feel like I'm in hell. Did I mention the bunks....stacked three deep...in close quarters,etc???

And three little words: "For the duration..."

Posted by: richard mcenroe at April 26, 2014 08:10 PM (XO6WW)

286 *Sigh*. I took this one way too seriously. Can't stop thinking about why our culture is so decadent that a movie is made after a board game, that this story could have been. Better told in a serious way....but at least Rihanna was there to make me feel better

Posted by: Danny at April 26, 2014 08:20 PM (lnXM3)

287 I played against Gadson!

I was a WR for USAFA from 84-88. Gadson was the Defensive End for Army?

Pretty sure I tried to block him a LOT.

Sir, thank you for your service. Your team still sucks your mascots balls and you will be better suited moving into the Women's Ivy League.

Perhaps you will win at least one game there.



Posted by: phat at April 26, 2014 08:37 PM (WwOs1)

288 "Is RIMPAC a real thing?

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at April 26, 2014 08:14 PM"

Yes. Yearly. I participated in them back in the 80's.

Posted by: The Vet is Jack Reacher at April 26, 2014 08:45 PM (3yfGn)

Posted by: phat at April 26, 2014 08:47 PM (WwOs1)

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