Ace of Spades HQ

February 28, 2014

Two Events Happening Simultaneously
— JohnE.

Good luck stomaching this.

5:37 PM ET:

JUST IN: David Martin reports Russia flying "hundreds" of troops into Crimea
— CBS News (@CBSNews) February 28, 2014

5:39 PM ET:

Obama: This is now officially happy hour with the Democratic Party
— Zeke Miller (@ZekeJMiller) February 28, 2014

Obama resumes his fundraising schedule after short Ukraine statement.

Amazing. Simply amazing.

Posted by: JohnE. at 01:51 PM | Comments (215)
Post contains 67 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Happyhour?

Posted by: steevy at February 28, 2014 01:51 PM (zqvg6)

2 happy hour? pinkies up!

Posted by: Chris at February 28, 2014 01:52 PM (WjMgb)

3 should be pinkos up.

Posted by: seamrog at February 28, 2014 01:53 PM (Qe/sQ)

4 Happy hour - selfie away, peeps!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars™ [/i] [/b] [/s] at February 28, 2014 01:53 PM (ZjvPR)

5 It's Happy Hour every hour for me.

Posted by: Slo Joe Biden [/i] at February 28, 2014 01:54 PM (CnA98)

6 Hey Obama said a couple of words, so everything is happiness and unicorns and sunshine and shit.

Posted by: nnptcgrad at February 28, 2014 01:54 PM (Opyrm)

7 I will have more leeway once I am reelected.

Posted by: Davod at February 28, 2014 01:54 PM (dj3iF)

8 zero fiddles while the world burns

Posted by: seamrog at February 28, 2014 01:54 PM (Qe/sQ)

9 I used to try and compare this guy to incompetent disinteresting monarchs. He's blown way past them...he actually wanted the goddamn job.

Posted by: jjshaka at February 28, 2014 01:54 PM (SgZzG)

10 Today's Friday not Waygu Wednesday. WTF?!

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 01:54 PM (o6g4X)

11 Wow-- the juxtaposition. The war for Obama is civil. He doesn't meet with Pentagon officials he's at the DNC.

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 01:55 PM (RJMhd)

12 Especially shit.

Posted by: nnptcgrad at February 28, 2014 01:55 PM (Opyrm)

13 World War 3 and Open Bar!

Two phrases that just seem to go together for progressive Time magaziners.

Posted by: MTF at February 28, 2014 01:55 PM (F58x4)

14 Haha! Hillary: "RESET", LOL! I never liked that beeyotch!

Posted by: Oblahblah at February 28, 2014 01:55 PM (o6g4X)

15 LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Posted by: Vlad Putin at February 28, 2014 01:55 PM (GSIDW)

16 Some vodka and caviar Comrade?

Posted by: Barack O'Stalin at February 28, 2014 01:56 PM (Q6pxP)

17 For someone who claimed he'd be able to influence the world, Barky really doesn't seem to give a shit.

Posted by: L, elle at February 28, 2014 01:56 PM (0xqKe)

18 We just gutted our military spending this week. I question the timing...

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 01:56 PM (o6g4X)

19 I wonder if Barky can see Sevastopol from his house - if his bat ears aren't in the way, that is.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars™ [/i] [/b] [/s] at February 28, 2014 01:56 PM (ZjvPR)

20 They don't even think it's necessary to act like they care.

Posted by: seamrog at February 28, 2014 01:56 PM (Qe/sQ)

21 WWHFD? (What Will Horse Face Do?)

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 01:56 PM (o6g4X)

22 is "Crimea" Russian for "Sudetenland"?

Posted by: NT at February 28, 2014 01:57 PM (RGgMp)

23 Right now the EU is just so much low hanging fruit.

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 01:57 PM (RJMhd)

24 Geez, and I don't even speak Russian! Crap!

Posted by: Joe I do the Sh*t Jobs Biden at February 28, 2014 01:57 PM (o6g4X)

25 Hey did you hear? I got to call the Ukraine this afternoon! It was really cool.

The connection was pretty good and I had an easy time understanding them, 'cause I speak pretty passable Urdu.

Posted by: Joe Biden at February 28, 2014 01:57 PM (F58x4)

26 well sort of.

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 01:57 PM (RJMhd)

27 What are the costs of being late to the fundraiser?

Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 28, 2014 01:57 PM (BBvOw)

28 Racism!

Posted by: MSDNC at February 28, 2014 01:58 PM (MMC8r)

29 I have to believe that Putin takes Obama's warnings as seriously as the NRA takes Piers Morgan's warnings

Posted by: kbdabear at February 28, 2014 01:58 PM (aTXUx)

30 I fear we have awakened a sleeping gi....what? He's in charge? HAHAHAHA, nevermind.

Posted by: World Despots, Inc. at February 28, 2014 01:58 PM (r/e1Q)

31 I'll be on my yacht if anyone needs me for some reason. But it better be important!

Posted by: John Kerry at February 28, 2014 01:59 PM (tv7DV)

32 Damn, I made my kids take Chinese for nothing...

Posted by: Dick "I'm a Dick" Durbin at February 28, 2014 01:59 PM (9ng2u)

33 God help us all.

Posted by: Throat Wobbler Mangrove at February 28, 2014 01:59 PM (sZBpq)

34 When O gets drunk on cash at these fundraisers, does he sing "It's all about the bling-ba-bling" or does he go old school with "Money, money, money, money, money Some people got to have it Some people really need it Listen to me y'all, do things Do things, do bad things with it You wanna do things, do things Do things, good things with it Talk about cash money, money Talk about cash money Dollar bills, yall"

Posted by: zombie at February 28, 2014 01:59 PM (mizYg)

35 9 I used to try and compare this guy to incompetent disinteresting monarchs. He's blown way past them...he actually wanted the goddamn job. Posted by: jjshaka at February 28, 2014 05:54 PM (SgZzG) He's incompetent because, ......he's really not all that smart. He just reads teleprompters with a liberal seducing baritone. Poorly educated and falsely credentialed. That's it. There is nothing else.

Posted by: 98ZJUSMC Rounding Error Extraordinaire at February 28, 2014 01:59 PM (OUYPn)

36 I'd be nervous if I was a former Soviet country. The Eastern Bloch is all on their own. Good luck with that. This is the most seriously unserious President ever. He makes Bill Clinton look like an effing statesman.

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 02:00 PM (o6g4X)

37 What are the costs of being late to the fundraiser?

Posted by: the littl shyning man

Stale champagne and the adulation is a tad less enthusiastic. A real downer.

Posted by: Pres. I,Me,Mine [/i][/b] at February 28, 2014 02:00 PM (uctT+)

38 Obama warns Putin that invasion would be met with condemnation by the world community That's about as severe as your principal warning you that this could go on your Permanent Record

Posted by: kbdabear at February 28, 2014 02:01 PM (aTXUx)

39 Koch bros!

Posted by: MSDNC at February 28, 2014 02:01 PM (MMC8r)

40 What a lazy asshole TFG is.

Posted by: L, elle at February 28, 2014 02:01 PM (0xqKe)

41 Quit bothering us. We're searching YouTube for some videos of Ukranians insulting Russians.

Posted by: U.S. State Department at February 28, 2014 02:01 PM (tv7DV)

42 I'd seriously rather have Jimmy Fucking Carter be president right now.

Posted by: Throat Wobbler Mangrove at February 28, 2014 02:02 PM (sZBpq)

43 I actually can't believe that CBS News tweeted that before they could figure out a way to blame Bush... Who's Zeke Miller?

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 02:02 PM (o6g4X)

44 I don't wish to be incontinent to the feelings of those concerned, but we have a clean, inarticulate, bright Precedent in the White House. That's fairy tale storybook, man.

Posted by: Slo Joe Biden [/i] at February 28, 2014 02:02 PM (CnA98)

45 War on Wimmin! War on Ukraine, notsomuch.

Posted by: MSDNC at February 28, 2014 02:02 PM (MMC8r)

46 It's a crime how Obama finds the "me" in the Crimea.

Posted by: zombie at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (mizYg)

47 I would like to comment on this subject but my waffles are getting cold.

Posted by: GMB who is anti everything at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (nkPV9)

48 I am beginning to see the attraction of being a LIV. Also an alcoholic.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD, you taunty bitch. at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (Gk3SS)

49 We're in the best of hands.

Posted by: Andy at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (ytax8)

50 Imagine Churchill saying costs. Carteresque.

Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (BBvOw)

51 I am crying a single tear

Posted by: Iron Eyes Cody at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (sZBpq)

52 Any news that doesn't help Michelle Obama's children isn't worth reporting...

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (o6g4X)

53 Putin plays chess. Obama and his media lackeys deny chess exists.

Posted by: Beagle at February 28, 2014 02:03 PM (J44/r)

54 Putin, I shall use my super affirmative action powers to lower the Black Sea to a puddle.

Hold my nine iron.

Posted by: Barky O'Genius at February 28, 2014 02:04 PM (8ZskC)

55 TONIGHT: A six-hour report on Mitt Romney's late library books.

Posted by: MSDNC at February 28, 2014 02:04 PM (MMC8r)

56 Girls just wanna have fun.

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:04 PM (Dwehj)

57 Oh boy. I just got the word. The Pres wants me to call Germany and talk to Angela Merkle. She's got her panties in a wad and the Pres doesn't like talking to her when she's pissed off. And she's always pissed off when she talks to Obiewan, and he thinks she doesn't buy his act at all. So I've got the big call!

Can you believe it?! She wants to know when we are shipping more tanks and missiles to Germany! Tanks. Missiles. What year does she live in? Hahahaha.

Posted by: Joe Biden at February 28, 2014 02:04 PM (F58x4)

58 I am beginning to see the attraction of being a LIV. Also an alcoholic.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD, you taunty bitch. at February 28, 2014 06:03 PM (Gk3SS)

For myself, I've found that "alcoholic" is enough.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (8ZskC)

59 Just when I thought I couldn't hate him any more.

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (hFL/3)

60 Did people feel like this when the Russians invaded Afghanistan? I was a kid, but this feels like shit, now.

Posted by: Throat Wobbler Mangrove at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (sZBpq)

61 "The Soviet Union is back, baby!!!!"

-----President Obama

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (hn70M)

62 BUUUUUUSSSSHHHHH!

Posted by: MSDNC at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (MMC8r)

63 He thinks it is pronounced "U-krawhn".

Posted by: Seamus Muldoon at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (g4TxM)

Obama warns Russia!!! Now there's a big threat. What's he going to do, stomp his foot and frown real hard? What a maroon.

Posted by: Cheri at February 28, 2014 02:05 PM (G+Wff)

65 You have nothing to fear from those in power suffering from arrested development.

Posted by: Señor Juan McCain at February 28, 2014 02:06 PM (Dwehj)

66 Obama to Putin: I'm warning you, this will be met with world condemnation Obama to Dems 5 minutes later: "All the Single Ladies, put your hands up!!"

Posted by: kbdabear at February 28, 2014 02:06 PM (aTXUx)

67 We are well and truly screwed if Barky can be this blatant about who and what he is, and no one of consequence (the Supreme Court, Congress, the "Media") is willing to call him out on it.

Heckova job, Barky. Heckova job.

You asshole.

Posted by: acethepug at February 28, 2014 02:06 PM (AqF/s)

68 Ha! The Daily Mail is reporting this: "A treaty signed in 1994 by the US and Britain could pull both countries into a war to protect Ukraine if President Putin's troops cross into the country. Bill Clinton, John Major, Boris Yeltsin and Leonid Kuchma Â– the then-rulers of the USA, UK, Russia and Ukraine - agreed to the The Budapest Memorandum as part of the denuclearization of former Soviet republics after the dissolution of the Soviet Union. Technically it means that if Russia has invaded Ukraine then it would be difficult for the US and Britain to avoid going to war."

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 02:06 PM (o6g4X)

69 'The 80s called and they want their foreign policy back.' A truly enlightened man with a dazzling intellect.

Posted by: MJ at February 28, 2014 02:06 PM (oari7)

70 Ha! The Daily Mail is reporting this:

"A treaty signed in 1994 by the US and Britain could pull both countries into a war to protect Ukraine if President Putin's troops cross into the country.

I've got a bad feeling about this.

Posted by: Archduke Francis Ferdinand at February 28, 2014 02:07 PM (8ZskC)

71 Up next: Why are Tea Partiers in the Ukraine trying to upset President Dreamboat? Could it be...racism?

Posted by: MSDNC at February 28, 2014 02:07 PM (MMC8r)

72 The SCOMF strikes again...and I wouldn't drink a beer with someone who relies on Joe Biden to find the Crimea on a map for him

Posted by: Tea for Me at February 28, 2014 02:08 PM (iBISi)

73 48 I am beginning to see the attraction of being a LIV. Also an alcoholic. Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD, you taunty bitch. at February 28, 2014 06:03 PM (Gk3SS) ******* 2 for 1 Molotov!

Posted by: Putin on the Ritz at February 28, 2014 02:08 PM (RJMhd)

74 I wonder if they're going to be playing "Back in the USSR" or "Happy Days Are Here Again" at that Democrat fundraiser. Unbelievable. Thanks a lot all you aholes that voted for this ahole.

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 02:08 PM (o6g4X)

75 We have intercepted a communication coming out of the Secretary of State's office: "Somebody send an intern out for another spray can of red paint. We're running low."

Posted by: S. Muldoon at February 28, 2014 02:08 PM (g4TxM)

76 68 Back then they didn't see a surrender monkey Like The JEF coming.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at February 28, 2014 02:08 PM (ojnk6)

77 'Barack Obama literally has a spine of steel.'

Posted by: Joe Biden at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (oari7)

78 Clearly this a crisis the previous administration left me with. Shut up thats why.

Posted by: Chavez the Hugo at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (Q8vlx)

79 I say this country will pay any price, bear any burden - shit, are they passing out the Cristal already?

Fuck, ok, um, libertyandjusticeforall. G'bless. Tootles.

Posted by: Pres. I,Me,Mine [/i][/b] at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (uctT+)

80 How many sternly worded letters can you pack into the warhead compartment of a Minuteman III?

Posted by: GMB who is anti everything at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (nkPV9)

81 Meanwhile, as China, Russia, NORKS and others become more belligerant and dangerous we are decimating our military. I would cry if I didn't think it was only going to get worse. I have to keep some sanity.

Posted by: Cheri at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (G+Wff)

82 Somebody tell the Daily Mail that we don't have rulers, no matter what they think.

Posted by: --- at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (MMC8r)

83 Silly Barry, happy hour does not start until rounding up the thought criminals begins.

Posted by: flounder at February 28, 2014 02:09 PM (Kkt/i)

84 So no athletes are gay anymore? That's it, Russia, and Happy Hour?

Posted by: blaster at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (4+AaH)

85 #68 Great--Now if only a visiting Archduke can be assasinated then all my plans will fall into place.

Posted by: Dick "I'm a Dick" Durbin at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (9ng2u)

86 Back then they didn't see a surrender monkey Like The JEF coming.

Uh, they didn't read my books? Oh, silly me! Of course not!

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (Dwehj)

87 I think the treaty actually gives us a great way to put pressure on Russia without actually having to fight. Just remind him of the treaty, and remind him that we are willing to uphold our part of the treaty. If we had anyone other than JEF, I doubt he'd call that bluff. But we have JEF. So we're going to war with Russia, aren't we?

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (hFL/3)

88 Sarah Palin - right again. (big h/t to sound awake in a prior thread)
She was, of course, hammered at the time (200

by idiots.

LINK: http://preview.tinyurl.com/lo7fklx (Breitbart)

Excerpt:

2008 campaign trail -
After the Russian Army invaded the nation of Georgia, Senator Obama's reaction was one of indecision and moral equivalence, the kind of response that would only encourage Russia's Putin to invade Ukraine next.

Posted by: mrp at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (JBggj)

89 Technically it means that if Russia has invaded Ukraine then it would be difficult for the US and Britain to avoid going to war."

This will be a great place to test our out new "Micro-Military" concept.

Posted by: Chuck Hagel, Certified Fucking Genius at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (8ZskC)

90 Obama, Look guys i got stuff to do that interests me much more. Party's to attend, people to fawn all over me. Why would i expend energy on those little countries over there? None of our business. shouldn't Russia and China have a chance at their intended destiny without our interference?

Posted by: willow at February 28, 2014 02:10 PM (nqBYe)

91 There's going to be a few single malts in order tonight. Aberfeldy 21 is called for.

Posted by: Throat Wobbler Mangrove at February 28, 2014 02:11 PM (sZBpq)

92 If we had anyone other than JEF, I doubt he'd call that bluff. But we have JEF. So we're going to war with Russia, aren't we?

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 06:10 PM (hFL/3)

Nope, we're going to talk a little weak smack, and then roll over.

Posted by: Country Singer at February 28, 2014 02:12 PM (r/e1Q)

93 A treaty signed in 1994 by the US and Britain could pull both countries into a war to protect Ukraine if President Putin's troops cross into the country.
===================================

OK. Maybe Barky should put his fucking drink down and head over to the office.

Posted by: MTF at February 28, 2014 02:12 PM (F58x4)

94 The problem is, America deserves Obama.

Say what you will about Dubya, but at least he looked to the Office as something more important than just beating his political opponents.

Posted by: McAdams at February 28, 2014 02:12 PM (FJHAk)

95 I can't shower the precedent with enough golden praise for his handling of this crisis.

Posted by: Slo Joe Biden [/i] at February 28, 2014 02:12 PM (CnA98)

96 " Sarah Palin - right again" But...but...but...they all told me she was a stupid snowbilly!

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:12 PM (hFL/3)

97 @9 - I don't think he wanted the job, at least not the job of executing the duties of the office of POTUS as described in the constitution. He's a wannabe dictator who wanted the perks.

Posted by: teej at February 28, 2014 02:13 PM (M3APu)

98 Fuck it, it's Friday and I'm outta here.

Posted by: America, 1776-2009 at February 28, 2014 02:13 PM (HxSXm)

99 I wonder if the President understands he cant spin a treaty obligation.

I'm sure most of Europe and Asia wonders the same thing.

Posted by: MTF at February 28, 2014 02:13 PM (F58x4)

100 Susan Rice wants you to know that youtube revealed no indications of an uprising in the Crimea. Totes surprise!

Posted by: Fritz at February 28, 2014 02:13 PM (PnMCP)

101 96 Romney may have had a thing or two to say on this very topic as well.

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at February 28, 2014 02:13 PM (ojnk6)

102 @60 When the Soviets invaded Afghanistan it was the lead story everywhere. As unserious as the 1970s seem in pop culture retrospectives, we as a society are delusional now by comparison. In the late 1970s people viewed the USSR as more powerful than the US. Now we seem to think that by default the US is a colossus astride the world with no rivals.

Posted by: Beagle at February 28, 2014 02:14 PM (J44/r)

103 The U.S. is bound by treaty to defend the territorial integrity of the Ukraine. I believe we pledged that to get them to give up their nukes or get Mila Kunis or something.

Posted by: Ernie McCracken at February 28, 2014 02:14 PM (1ISHv)

104 I can see the Crimea from my house!

Posted by: Things that the media said for Sarah Palin at February 28, 2014 02:14 PM (Dwehj)

105 That empty chair isn't even being occupied by an empty suit tonight. SMH.

Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 02:14 PM (o6g4X)

106 Technically it means that if Russia has invaded Ukraine then it would be difficult for the US and Britain to avoid going to war." Umm, given the state of military affairs, it would be difficult for the US and Britain to go to war.

Posted by: blaster at February 28, 2014 02:14 PM (4+AaH)

107 Ha! The Daily Mail is reporting this: "A treaty signed in 1994 by the US and Britain could pull both countries into a war to protect Ukraine if President Putin's troops cross into the country. Their 'out' will be to pretend that Crimea isn't really Ukraine. And while Crimea has some autonomy, it's still part of Ukraine. They voted to stay in Ukraine after the fall of the Soviet Union, they vote in Ukraine elections, and are governed by Ukraine laws. Not that we should go to war with Russia over it, of course.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at February 28, 2014 02:14 PM (SY2Kh)

108 War mongers!

Posted by: Chamberlin at February 28, 2014 02:15 PM (oari7)

109 This fooking guy. Makes the fact that I am reading the new Horowitz book makes this e even more chilling.

Posted by: Mikhail PugovichMahonski at February 28, 2014 02:15 PM (UlL+q)

110 I wonder if the President understands he cant spin a treaty obligation.

Wanna bet, pal? Look what I've done to The Constitution!

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:16 PM (Dwehj)

111 Does the Pentagon still use ballistic missiles to deliver sternly worded letters?

Posted by: GMB who is anti everything at February 28, 2014 02:16 PM (nkPV9)

112 Rearrange those deck chairs. This DNC cocktail party is getting messy.

Posted by: Priorities, Priorities at February 28, 2014 02:16 PM (D+lxs)

113 89 This will be a great place to test our out new "Micro-Military" concept.
Posted by: Chuck Hagel, Certified Fucking Genius at February 28, 2014 06:10 PM (8ZskC)
Is that what one uses against microaggression?

Posted by: Bertram Cabot Jr. at February 28, 2014 02:17 PM (YgTB4)

114 I have negotiated Peace in Our Time. Russia will get Crimea and America will get a first round draft pick from South America at a later time.

Posted by: John Francois Kerry, Worthy Successor to Hillary! Clinton at February 28, 2014 02:17 PM (8ZskC)

115 I usually have a wry smile for my wife when she talks about the Fatima prophesies...that smile isn't so wry at the moment.

Posted by: H Badger at February 28, 2014 02:17 PM (er9dx)

116 If a dead US ambassador and other Americans don't interrupt the Dem Vegas happy hour, the Ukraine sure as hell won't.

Posted by: prescient11 at February 28, 2014 02:17 PM (tVTLU)

117 condemnation by the world community

That and a firecracker might startle a cat.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 28, 2014 02:17 PM (P7Wsr)

118 99 He doesn't need to understand this. His will be done and all...

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at February 28, 2014 02:17 PM (ojnk6)

119 There's nothing like a good fundraiser to take one's mind off of Armageddon.

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:18 PM (Dwehj)

120 I wonder if the President understands he cant spin a treaty obligation.

I'm sure most of Europe and Asia wonders the same thing.

Posted by: MTF

Remember Toonces doesn't do "Promises". To him the Constitution that he swore to defend and uphold is just a old yellow piece of paper written by racist old white men.

Posted by: Cheri at February 28, 2014 02:18 PM (G+Wff)

121 Mitt Romney might have been a better choice. Just saying.

Posted by: Clint Eastwood at February 28, 2014 02:19 PM (F58x4)

122 97 @9 - I don't think he wanted the job, at least not the job of executing the duties of the office of POTUS as described in the constitution. He's a wannabe dictator who wanted the perks. Posted by: teej at February 28, 2014 06:13 PM (M3APu) If he could be King and just host parties at the White House Palace, he would be happy as shit. The media and Dems (BIRM) would eat that shit up. The tabloids could have all kinds of special editions devoted to them and their dogs. Mooch could do all of her annoying PSA's, and TFG could run around the country playing golf wherever he wanted. You have to figure if we gave him $250M a year for his Kingly expenses, it would have saved the country about $3.5T in new debt.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, formerly MrCaniac at February 28, 2014 02:19 PM (HxSXm)

123 We're gonna need more F-22s.

Posted by: mrp at February 28, 2014 02:19 PM (JBggj)

124 Wait! Time out! Let me downsize the military first before any of this war talk.

Posted by: Hagel at February 28, 2014 02:19 PM (GSIDW)

125

48 I am beginning to see the attraction of being a LIV. Also an alcoholic.
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD, you taunty bitch. at February 28, 2014 06:03 PM (Gk3SS)

It will work until you see that thermo-nuclear bright flash. Then it will not matter any more.

Posted by: Priorities, Priorities at February 28, 2014 02:20 PM (D+lxs)

126
As someone in the last thread noticed:

Garry Kasparov ‏@Kasparov63

WHAT?! MT @stephenfhayes: Admin tell CNN's this is an "uncontested
arrival" not necessarily "an invasion" that this distinction is
"key." [i/]

Al Roker called to say he had an uncontested arrival in his pants.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at February 28, 2014 02:20 PM (gorVZ)

127 The more I think about this the more afraid I become. If we had a real leader, he would be meeting with his advisers right now trying to figure out the best way to mitigate this situation. I don't think Obama is even aware of the situation. I think you and I, with our 15 minutes of googling, understand more about our treaty with the Ukraine than Obama does. I question if he is even aware of our treaty with the Ukraine. Happy Hour? *deep breaths*

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:20 PM (hFL/3)

128 White House diplomatic message will not attend the G-8 Summit if Russian forces are in "Ukraine". [Might depend on what your definition of 'Ukraine"--is.]

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 02:21 PM (RJMhd)

129 Partying again? It looks like the only 3 AM call this president is ever going to hear is "Last call!" at bar closing time.

Posted by: S. Muldoon at February 28, 2014 02:21 PM (g4TxM)

130 Maybe we should hold our hands over our ears and eyes and that way we won't know whats happening in the Crimea.

Posted by: National Security Advisor at February 28, 2014 02:21 PM (F58x4)

131 Obama hates the job of being the US President. The perk? Yeah, but not the actual job. Thanks again 52% since I haven't thanked you in a while.

Posted by: dogfish at February 28, 2014 02:22 PM (nsOJa)

132 "114 I have negotiated Peace in Our Time. Russia will get Crimea and America will get a first round draft pick from South America at a later time." *snicker* Thank you. I needed that.

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:22 PM (hFL/3)

133 Benghazi , oops sorry off to fundraise and hng out with my cronies. oops Ukraine , off to fundraise , and hang out with my.. Iran. er yep Japan. busy dialtone.

Posted by: willow at February 28, 2014 02:22 PM (nqBYe)

134 115 I usually have a wry smile for my wife when she talks about the Fatima prophesies...that smile isn't so wry at the moment. Posted by: H Badger at February 28, 2014 06:17 PM (er9dx ********* Oh crap--what do they say about the Ukraine?

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 02:23 PM (RJMhd)

135 Mexico should invade California under the Uncontested Arrival Doctrine.

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 28, 2014 02:23 PM (hn70M)

136 All of our promises have expiration dates.

Posted by: Barky advisor, when talking to frantic Ukrainian ambassador at February 28, 2014 02:23 PM (F58x4)

137

The death of innocents means nothing to TFG. If he supports shelving new born babies who survive an abortion and letting them die, do you really think he gives a shit about anyone but himself?

He is the king of the culture of death. Beyonce and Jay-Z mean more to him.

Posted by: Cheri at February 28, 2014 02:23 PM (G+Wff)

138 You have to figure if we gave him $250M a year for his Kingly expenses, it would have saved the country about $3.5T in new debt.

They'd run out of money after three months. The White House yearly budget is a cool billion dollars.

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 28, 2014 02:24 PM (P7Wsr)

139 Maybe it's good the inept fucker is out of the picture. Like every damn thing he tries to do, he'd just make it worse.

Posted by: Dang at February 28, 2014 02:24 PM (MNq6o)

140 You know where you can almost always get an uncontested arrival-- France.

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 02:24 PM (RJMhd)

141 Lauren, *Pushes a couple shots through USB port*

Posted by: Beagle at February 28, 2014 02:24 PM (J44/r)

142 Ha ha! Obama, fuck you!

Posted by: Syrian what paints red lines at February 28, 2014 02:25 PM (PnMCP)

143 We don't have these problems. Just saying.

Posted by: Perugia Visitors Bureau at February 28, 2014 02:25 PM (F58x4)

144 All sad. I missed teej again.

Posted by: L, elle at February 28, 2014 02:25 PM (0xqKe)

145 99 I wonder if the President understands he cant spin a treaty obligation. I'm sure most of Europe and Asia wonders the same thing. Posted by: MTF at February 28, 2014 06:13 PM (F58x4) You can bet if he backs away, every other country we have a treaty with will do the same thing. In that case, watch the world explode when everyone begins attacking their geopolitical rivals. China takes Asia, India gets a little frisky, the Russians take over some of their old stomping grounds, Colombia is good and fucked in South America, South Korea will be glowing for several thousand years, and a good chunk of the middle east lays siege to Israel. Gonna be a bumpy time, and too bad Alaska will be watching it all on Russian TV. But hey, we will still have fantabulous ghey weddings and greatly reduced healthcare.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, formerly MrCaniac at February 28, 2014 02:25 PM (HxSXm)

146

Keeps going like this, and there's gonna be a run on Rosetta Stone for Russian.

Cause 0'zero is making damn sure that the USA ain't the leader of the free, or any other world, for that matter.

Jim

Sunk New Dawn

Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim at February 28, 2014 02:25 PM (vvk2F)

147 What the hell do you expect ? Obama is possibly the biggest piece of shit to ever serve the office. Completely incompetent, tone deaf, ridiculously partisan, and driving the US into the ground.

Posted by: deadrody at February 28, 2014 02:26 PM (+Dpo7)

148 Obama fundraising for his next political campaign? There never was a law he didn't break at will. POTUS 3rd round. Obama fundraising for his next tax paid vacation? He certainly doesn't ever spend his own money. Who the hell is getting his collective funds? More to the point, who the hell is still giving him more funding? Keynesian logic: if we just keep spending more money on him, he's bound to make good at some point down hill. Debt is Gold as Stupidity is Brilliant.

Posted by: panzernashorn at February 28, 2014 02:26 PM (MhA4j)

149 *slams down shot glass*

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:26 PM (hFL/3)

150 Well, look, listen...It is Friday. It's the week end. Government shuts down, especially Obama's government shuts down on Friday. There is no news on the week end. Nothing happens on the week end.

Monday morning, there will be some meetings scheduled to deal with 'things' should meetings be needed. There will be allies to consult with, contingency plans to update. So just relax. Have a drink.

Posted by: Harold Ewiees at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (wdfmd)

151 My wife is better on it than I am because I usually tune it out. She just got a look on her face like a kicked a small child when I mentioned the Russians just waltzed into Ukraine.

Posted by: H Badger at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (er9dx)

152
Oblather has the perfect out, if you don't call it an invasion, you don't have to honor your treaty.

Its the international "jobs created or saved".

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (gorVZ)

153 At least Vlad had the courtesy to pretty much wait until after Fridays market close to invade.....just sayin

Posted by: Owlpellets at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (0Ltoz)

154 An Uncontested Arrival is similar to a Vacation In Force.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (8ZskC)

155 Can't wait to hear Sam Powers' angry denunciation of the Russian invasion at the next UN Security Council meeting. Tenterhooks, really. I mean it! Pretty much.

Posted by: mrp at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (JBggj)

156 In an escalation of rhetoric, President Obama has threatened to withhold his birthday present to Vladimir Putin if he does not cease hostilities in Ukraine.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (SY2Kh)

157 I watched Red Dawn with my 24 year old son last night. I told him it used to be entertainment now it's a training film.

Posted by: Trav at February 28, 2014 02:27 PM (PEKYn)

158 I saw Uncontested Arrival open for French Surrender Monkeys back in '03.

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 28, 2014 02:28 PM (hn70M)

159 151 My wife is better on it than I am because I usually tune it out. She just got a look on her face like a kicked a small child when I mentioned the Russians just waltzed into Ukraine. Posted by: H Badger at February 28, 2014 06:27 PM (er9dx) *********** Thanks. I've always been interested in that but scared to look. It's like not reading Revelations--or something.

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 02:28 PM (RJMhd)

160 Did you notice? Russia adopted the "late Friday afternoon" Obama method of delivering bad news.

Putin probably can't understand how anyone even noticed the uncontested arrival/invasion.

Posted by: MTF at February 28, 2014 02:29 PM (F58x4)

161

Pray that our Defense and State Department officials. Pray that they can make their superiors understand how dangerous this world is. Pray that they can convince enough of our government that this is not a partisan Democrat issue.

Pray for our Soldiers, Airman, Navy and Marines. They are going to have to try to pull our nation's reputation out of the dumper when the world comes crashing down.

Posted by: All we can do at February 28, 2014 02:29 PM (D+lxs)

162 Good thing China won't notice The Feckless Won fecking everything up. That could be problematic.

Posted by: Beagle at February 28, 2014 02:29 PM (J44/r)

163 36 I'd be nervous if I was a former Soviet country. The Eastern Bloch is all on their own. Good luck with that. This is the most seriously unserious President ever. He makes Bill Clinton look like an effing statesman. Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 06:00 PM (o6g4X) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Well of course. Bill Clinton was ACTUALLY smart. So when it came to things he didn't know much about, like foreign affairs or the military, he generally listened to the people that DID know. Obama, on the other hand, is a moron who only THINKS he's smart. So he doesn't listen to anyone because he erroneously thinks he is the smartest person in the room no matter what the issue. It would be interesting to see how he is remembered in US history if not for the fact that you'll have to be doing it from inside a bomb shelter after the economic apocalypse.

Posted by: deadrody at February 28, 2014 02:30 PM (+Dpo7)

164 If you are looking for places to arrive uncontestedly -- Switzerland. Cocoa and lots of money from the tax evaders & drug lords. Plus men in tights.

Posted by: tasker at February 28, 2014 02:30 PM (RJMhd)

165 So, as fun as it is to make fun of president stompy foot...

What would you have him do? Is this really something you think we should send our soldiers to die for?

I think we should stay out of it...but i am willing to be convinced as to why it is vital we intercede.

Posted by: mrShad at February 28, 2014 02:31 PM (C5V36)

166 They'd run out of money after three months. The White House yearly budget is a cool billion dollars. Posted by: bonhomme at February 28, 2014 06:24 PM (P7Wsr) Not talking about him living and working at the White House, but the White House Palace, new place. That is because it is the seat of power. What he would be is powerless, so he doesn't need the staff and military attaches he has now. Just needs some cooks and shit. A royal limo, royal plane and heli, some bartenders, some security, and a bitchin pad. He doesn't get the power of the White House, just the lifestyle. Might cost more the first year to build the Palace and buy the shit, but it would pay off over time.

Posted by: Ashley Judd's Puffy Scamper, formerly MrCaniac at February 28, 2014 02:31 PM (HxSXm)

167 Its darkly hilarious how the buffoons in government and their media lackeys think the reality of things can be changed just by giving them a pretty name.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at February 28, 2014 02:31 PM (8ZskC)

168 Why is Jef still around? Doesn't he have somewhere else to go? A fundraiser nobody heard of, for instance.

Posted by: NCwoof at February 28, 2014 02:31 PM (aUQgu)

169 ok you can have Georgia but not Cremea , ok Cremea but not all of the Ukraine , alright fine all the Ukraine but not Poland . srsly don't even look further than that or else.

Posted by: willow at February 28, 2014 02:31 PM (nqBYe)

170 It's a penalty/arrival.

Posted by: John Roberts at CNN at February 28, 2014 02:32 PM (RJMhd)

171 "What would you have him do? Is this really something you think we should send our soldiers to die for?" No, but the treaty changes the calculus. It gives us a lot of leverage if we have a strong president. It puts us in a lot of danger wit ha weak president. Aren't you glad we have Obama?

Posted by: Lauren at February 28, 2014 02:32 PM (hFL/3)

172 How many more chickens do we have, Lurch?

Posted by: Barky O'Genius at February 28, 2014 02:33 PM (8ZskC)

173 Gonna be a bumpy time... Mr. Precedent, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed. But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops. Uh, depending on the breaks.

Posted by: General "Buck" Turgidson [/i] at February 28, 2014 02:33 PM (CnA98)

174 I think we should stay out of it...but i am willing to be convinced as to why it is vital we intercede.
Posted by: mrShad

How about because we have a defense treaty with them? Or do you use the Obama method when applying laws?

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 28, 2014 02:33 PM (hn70M)

175 i'm sure this will be a kinder gentler soviet empire.

Posted by: willow at February 28, 2014 02:33 PM (nqBYe)

176 Posted by: runningrn at February 28, 2014 06:06 PM (o6g4X) But Barky has a pen and a phone.

Posted by: BignJames at February 28, 2014 02:33 PM (j7iSn)

177 I just love ZM's other tweet: Obama on GOP: "Just because this theory has a history doesn't mean it should have a future" Doesn't that just make you warm and fuzzy and wanna turn in your guns?

Posted by: ChicagoRefugee who is, in fact, a Real Woman at February 28, 2014 02:34 PM (C15wm)

178 "How about because we have a defense treaty with them? Or do you use the Obama method when applying laws?"

I didn't know about the treaty.

That does complicate things.

Posted by: mrShad at February 28, 2014 02:34 PM (C5V36)

179 If he had any fighting sense at all, he would immediately reverse the idiotic DOD reductions; and announce the building of 12 new carriers.

Posted by: NCwoof at February 28, 2014 02:35 PM (aUQgu)

180 But Barky has a pen and a phone. Posted by: BignJames at February 28, 2014 06:33 PM
======
Time for another publicity photo. Maybe this time he'll put both feet on the Resolute desk with a firm scowl on his face.

Posted by: mrp at February 28, 2014 02:35 PM (JBggj)

181 Obama's actions make sense. He's an internationalist, not an American, and he loves the idea of presiding over Amerikkka's decline and fall, which Rev. Wright cheers on as "justice." To Obama, this is perfectly satisfactory. Where's my man Jay-Z? No, you the man! Baby, I wasn't looking at nobody's ass but yours. Etc. 2016 can't come soon enough.

Posted by: Feh at February 28, 2014 02:35 PM (g/zj9)

182
Kate Upton just gave me an uncontested arrival in my pants.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at February 28, 2014 02:36 PM (gorVZ)

183 I think zippy likes the Title, President of the United States, but I don't think he really cares about governing. He should've just stayed in the Senate. He could just make speech after speech, citing injustice, write several more "autobiographies" based on mosaics of people he almost knew, and collect his check/benefits.

I mean, he's from Illinois. He could run unopposed until he's seventy. This presidentin' stuff seems out of his league.

Posted by: boned to the bone at February 28, 2014 02:36 PM (Ph479)

184 How long before we are attacked by one of these commie shit holes? Hecka of a job Barky.

Posted by: Infidel at February 28, 2014 02:36 PM (cojT9)

185 Ya'll can't say you didn't know this day was coming, eventually!

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:37 PM (Dwehj)

186 Have you ever noticed that doesn't lie to our enemies he lies to us? Putin: I'll be flexible. America: I won't do it in your mouth.

Posted by: MJ at February 28, 2014 02:37 PM (oari7)

187 ...or y'all...oh, whatever

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:37 PM (Dwehj)

188 ^^^^^^ Obama....,

Posted by: MJ at February 28, 2014 02:38 PM (oari7)

189 Don't forget - John Kerry says Russia is ready to help the Ukraine with all their financial needs!

Posted by: ChicagoRefugee who is, in fact, a Real Woman at February 28, 2014 02:38 PM (C15wm)

190 Barkeep, pour me another Shirley Temple and make it a double.

Posted by: Prez'nit 404 at February 28, 2014 02:38 PM (Dwehj)

191 Nood

Posted by: ManWithNoParty at February 28, 2014 02:39 PM (ojnk6)

192 In other news, TFG just airlifted Barney Frank into the Chik fila compound to demonstrate a strong response.

Posted by: Owlpellets at February 28, 2014 02:39 PM (0Ltoz)

193 Cheri @137 Ma'am, it could not have been put any better... by anyone. I'm still around L, elle. The white screens haven't gotten me yet. No guarantees on what happens after I hit post.

Posted by: teej at February 28, 2014 02:40 PM (AoY8i)

194 @165 Step one: pretend like he cares through actions, not one presser then off to a fundraiser. Step two: coordinate publicly with as many allies as possible. Step three: listen to those allies in planning step four. Or, go be a hyperpartisan jackass at a fundraiser as usual. At this point what difference does it make?

Posted by: Beagle at February 28, 2014 02:41 PM (J44/r)

195 Wonder how this will affect the PaperTiger futures on NASDAQ?

Posted by: Owlpellets at February 28, 2014 02:42 PM (0Ltoz)

196 But what does Peggy Noonan think? Not heard from you say? Odd, that.

Posted by: NCwoof at February 28, 2014 02:42 PM (aUQgu)

197 You forgot 4.Profit?, Beagle.

Posted by: boned to the bone at February 28, 2014 02:43 PM (Ph479)

198 That warning to Putin was sent using 18 point Comic Sans MS bold.

Posted by: John F. Kerry at February 28, 2014 02:43 PM (mETGQ)

199 Peas in our time! And carrots, and whole grain bread...

Posted by: Moochelle at February 28, 2014 02:44 PM (8MjqI)

200 140 You know where you can almost always get an uncontested arrival-- France. Wait... WHAT? errrr... Vass?

Posted by: Kaiser Wilhelm II at February 28, 2014 02:56 PM (kduZC)

201 157 I watched Red Dawn with my 24 year old son last night. I told him it used to be entertainment now it's a training film. Which one? The real one with the Swazy or the fake korean one with that Thor fella?

Posted by: Havildar - Major at February 28, 2014 02:59 PM (kduZC)

202 So who was doing that Bane thing? Was that ace?

Anyway, that voice reminded me of Billy Crystal in Running Scared. Crystal's character did an impression of I don't even remember what now, but the voice was identical.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at February 28, 2014 03:06 PM (IN7k+)

203 So, what would hypothetical president Mitt Romney do? Obama is still a putz, but I'm not sure if we should be involved in the Ukraine any more than Syria or Libya.

Posted by: sexypig at February 28, 2014 03:10 PM (dZQh7)

204 Clearly the world is a safer place without nukes and that evil hegemon, the USA.

Posted by: Feh at February 28, 2014 03:15 PM (g/zj9)

205 Mitt probably wouldn't have painted a big old Kick Me sign on America's ass. Obama not only painted one, he bolted it on and bent over.

Posted by: Feh at February 28, 2014 03:17 PM (g/zj9)

206 Jason Collins is still gay!!

Posted by: ESPN at February 28, 2014 03:19 PM (15w2J)

207 March 1975, democrats we don't need no stinking treaties

Posted by: drunkineastmesa at February 28, 2014 03:27 PM (l7HsE)

208 Happy Hour. Huh.

Posted by: HR at February 28, 2014 03:31 PM (hO8IJ)

209 And...isn't it great that our military is soon to be at the same levels prior to WWII? With Russia parking a battleship in Cuba I know I feel warm and fuzzy and regret not drinking due to od'ing on chocolate today. I might as well fatten up for the coming end as we know it. Me and Crist will be the last to go on this penninsual called Florida. Me due to fat. Crist due to being part cockroach (other part Blue Iguana).

The plan set in motion by Barry seems to be going well! Reduce us to the level field of third world...check! Reduce and humiliate military...check! Totally screw up housing and economy...check! Freeze and focus on Tea Party and religious right...check! More time spent with iReggie...check! Work on shit eating grin...check!

Each day I am surprised at the depth of feeling. I think, like the peeling of an onion I will finally reach the core. Nope! xoxo

Note to self: buy expensive gin. To hell with diet and liver! When the end comes, no regrets.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky, Judge of Raciss Morons at February 28, 2014 04:01 PM (baL2B)

210 "Obama resumes his fundraising schedule after short Ukraine statement." Presidentin' is hard, he's got people for that...

Posted by: The Gay Gestapo at February 28, 2014 04:53 PM (vA94g)

211 socks arrgh...

Posted by: Shoey at February 28, 2014 04:53 PM (vA94g)

212 >>What would you have him do? Is this really something you think we should send our soldiers to die for? I think we should stay out of it...but i am willing to be convinced as to why it is vital we intercede. Posted by: mrShad at February 28, 2014 06:31 PM (C5V36) I guess it depends on what you think are Putin's limits. So far he has contented himself with states where the US military aren't. Now if he can shove on Poland to get out of NATO, or Turkey out of NATO, he'll really be moving. Not to mention Russia's biggest neighbor is China, who also has some real estate desires hampered by the US military. Also I guess it depends on whether you think Kerry meant it when he said the Monroe Doctrine was dead, and whether China and Russia would agree to take advantage. And so far it is just bluff. He hasn't beat down anybody; he just shows the flag and dares anybody to start a war with Russia. I don't think he can take casualties and survive, politically. So long as the US is pretending we can't afford to fight Russia, in my opinion, he's poised to keep undermining US allies and making hay off the turmoil.

Posted by: Chris_Balsz at February 28, 2014 08:09 PM (FSKSQ)

213 Whatever Barack wants is okay with me. But I so wish I had been invited to happy hour.

Posted by: Weepy John Boehner at March 01, 2014 04:33 AM (42ZAm)

214 what is with this fucking asshole and his fundraising? every time there is a crisis, he goes asking for money!

what a jerk!

Posted by: Lost In Maryland at March 01, 2014 04:47 AM (CDGl8)

215 The Telegraph reported that news early in the am. I'm finding that keeping British, Asian, Russian news feeds often notifies me of events anywhere from several hours to several days ahead of the US media.

Posted by: Miguel de Cervantes at March 01, 2014 06:34 AM (6zd0p)

Hide Comments | Add Comment | Refresh | Top

Comments are disabled. Post is locked.

160kb generated in CPU 0.0824, elapsed 0.2767 seconds.
64 queries taking 0.2406 seconds, 343 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.