Ace of Spades HQ

January 14, 2014

Who's Up for Another High-Budget Prank for Another Mid-Budget Horror Movie?
— Ace

This would-be viral video of a telekinetic girl having a bad case of PKMS in a coffee shop for the movie Carrie was pretty good. I didn't see Carrie, and basically no one else did either, but the prank was good.

So basically the viral ad didn't work, as far as getting people to actually see the retread movie.

Well, there are two things Hollywood likes to do a whole heck of a lot:

1. Imitate and copy things that worked before

2. Imitate and copy things that did not work before

Basically they just like to imitate and copy things. So there's a new movie coming up called Devil's Due, which I imagine is just ripoff of Rosmary's Baby, The Exorcist, and The Omen, except with CGI, and so now they've rigged up a Possessed Devil Baby in a Haunted Baby Carriage to scare passers-by.

Video below.

Also from io9: A sculptor did a series of "Visible Body" sculptures, you know, where you can see the skeleton and internal organs. Except he did it with toys.

I call this "My Pretty Nightmare:"

Okay, that oversells it. It's not that scary. In fact, the sculptor says even kids aren't scared:

"Kids aren't scared by them. They're fascinated," says Freeny, the New York-based artist who's hand-sculpted hundreds of these inner anatomies, built into commercially-available toys, over the last seven years. "I believe that being frightened by inner anatomy is a learned thing. It's something that's taught to kids by society, rather than something that's innate."

His version of Barbie offers an anatomically correct view of the inside of one breast, as well as some detail of the pudendum, which, in scientific jargon, is called the mons junk.

Anyway, enough silliness. Let's get to that Possessed Devil Baby.

This post certified "Fresh" by Dave from Garfield Ridge.

Posted by: Ace at 01:32 PM | Comments (185)
Post contains 327 words, total size 3 kb.

1 If only I were really first.

Posted by: SMOD at January 14, 2014 01:34 PM (eV1I0)

2 Yikes. That pony is creeping me out.

Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 01:34 PM (P6QsQ)

3 Toys? Pranks? Movies? Is this what this "blog" has become? People are DYING somewhere or something.

Posted by: The Guy Who Always Complains About a Single Non-Political Post at January 14, 2014 01:35 PM (/FnUH)

4 I don't like the big eye-hole.

Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 01:35 PM (P6QsQ)

5 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a malignant traitor.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:36 PM (PYAXX)

6 Brony curious, are we?

Posted by: Lincolntf at January 14, 2014 01:36 PM (ZshNr)

7 Forget the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Hollywood seems to be all about One Degree from British TV & Movies.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at January 14, 2014 01:36 PM (IXrOn)

8 I'll get the others.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:36 PM (PYAXX)

9 now that's content...and innards.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:37 PM (yICtd)

10 Alternate video title: when democrats attack.

Posted by: Darth Randall at January 14, 2014 01:37 PM (Zswg6)

11 Soo, Bill and Hillary! had a another child?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at January 14, 2014 01:38 PM (0HooB)

12 As a person who has to play with My Little Ponies on a regular basis, I object.

Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 01:38 PM (P6QsQ)

13 His version of Barbie offers an anatomically correct view of the inside of one breast

If I ever get genitalia, I'd hit it.

Posted by: Ken at January 14, 2014 01:38 PM (8ZskC)

14 I saw Carrie, good movie.

Posted by: Vic[/i] at January 14, 2014 01:39 PM (T2V/1)

15 It's cool when Ace gets to post on Sven's blog.

Posted by: Flatbush Joe at January 14, 2014 01:39 PM (ZPrif)

16 Okay, raised hands if you'd love to see a bunch of little kids (mostly girls) go to a My Little Pony movie only to find out it was a horror flick.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:39 PM (PYAXX)

17 This got lost in one of the previous outrage threads, but I think I found the future outfitter for the Imperial Ravage: http://tinyurl.com/q9leo5h

Posted by: Brother Cavil, still chilly at January 14, 2014 01:39 PM (naUcP)

18 PKMS? Ok, then.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:39 PM (DhGW2)

19 Hollywood sucks donkey balls. And ass.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:39 PM (DhGW2)

20 Too bad the baby didn't shape-shift into _____. That would be some scary sh*t.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at January 14, 2014 01:40 PM (IXrOn)

21 If I ever get genitalia, I'd hit it. Posted by: Ken Dude, she dumped your ass for G I Joe...

Posted by: Brother Cavil, still chilly at January 14, 2014 01:40 PM (naUcP)

22 13 Oh if I were just like you. (Sigh)

Posted by: Chelsie Manning at January 14, 2014 01:40 PM (Zswg6)

23 I got a Ben Franklin that says that that 3 minute prank vid is both scarier AND more entertaining than the actual movie.

Posted by: looking closely at January 14, 2014 01:40 PM (TZsWx)

24 Mi Leetle Boney, cabron!

Posted by: Cicero Kid. Now with more Spanglish! at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (tcK++)

25 that Devil baby was great. Scaring the crap out of people is big fun.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (yICtd)

26 Bollywood > Gonorrhea > Hollywood.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (DhGW2)

27 So they launched a baby buggy into traffic, then scared the crap out of people trying to rescue it? Sounds kind of crummy.

Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (P6QsQ)

28 Mons-junk . Heh .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (XWw96)

Hollywood has become so inbred...they wouldn't know a good idea if it hit them between the eyes.

Posted by: wheatie at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (9p2Wz)

30 Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 05:39 PM (PYAXX) My little pony apocalypse pony! I never got these prank things. It seems like it only takes a prank against one unhinged lunatic for something to go wrong.

Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) No Really! at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (GaqMa)

31 Sorta related: I recently saw the old SNL episode hosted by Sissy Spacek when the original came out. For a soulless ginger, she was quite the hot little number back then.

Posted by: BurtTC at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (JjNlj)

32 11 Soo, Bill and Hillary! had a another child?
**************

"Another?"

Posted by: Zombie Web Hubbel at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (vgIRn)

33 The anatomical version of the Pillsbury doughboy is just wrong. I mean, he's made out of DOUGH, right? No skeleton. No innards. Just layer and layer of dough. Sheesh.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 01:41 PM (dfYL9)

34 I got a Ben Franklin that says that that 3 minute prank vid is both scarier AND more entertaining than the actual movie. Probably better production value, too. Horror movies were always cheep to make, because they could skimp on actors' salaries (they picked no-names for the most part), and on effects budgets (they're famous for using dirt-cheap materials). Now they're even cheaper to make, because they can just re-use old scripts!

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (PYAXX)

35 mons junk. ***** LOL! Damn it. Why not-- mes junks?

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (RJMhd)

36 Ace, I don't see why you can't imitate Scorcese and make a million bucks. All you do is take any story, male leads, add a lot of drugs and music, have the characters reach their peak followed by them spiraling out of control due to mostly the drugs and then end up in witness protection. You'll be rich.

Posted by: Judge Pug at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (Qev5V)

37 hate.you.guys.

Posted by: willow at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (nqBYe)

38 If Hollywood had talent and sucked less, it would be Gay Porn.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (DhGW2)

39 So 0bama is making a bold call by sending homosexual former athletes to represent the USA at the Olympics next month? What a crock. There are plenty of Muslim countries that are far more repressive and who twisted the Game committee to minimize remembrances of the Munich massacre. The Olympics are second only to the UN as an exercise in empty, self-important hypocritical bullshitting and posturing and probably has the UN beat in self-righteousness.

Posted by: logprof at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (X3GkB)

40 16 Okay, raised hands if you'd love to see a bunch of little kids (mostly girls) go to a My Little Pony movie only to find out it was a horror flick.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 05:39 PM (PYAXX)

See, that's what I'm talkin about.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:42 PM (yICtd)

41 Ben Affleck

Posted by: meh at January 14, 2014 01:43 PM (W2qJe)

42 Hold me with your Kung-Fu grip, Joe.

Posted by: Barbie at January 14, 2014 01:43 PM (QupBk)

43 I just discoved "Horrible Histories" a British history show. Season 1, Ep. 1 on YouTube: http://youtu.be/6Xvbh0hhx8o Like Monty Python doing history. We (kids and I) had to pause it a few times to laugh. Second episode wasn't quite as funny. Quite a bit of gross stuff. The songs are catchy.

Posted by: Mama AJ at January 14, 2014 01:43 PM (SUKHu)

44 Hollywood non creative types: Hey, let's flip off the NYPD with a grotesque robot baby. That would be so awesome, dude!

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (IXrOn)

45 The anatomical version of the Pillsbury doughboy is just wrong. I mean, he's made out of DOUGH, right? He's way too happy for somebody with no pecker.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b] at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (0HooB)

46 That pony thing is stupid.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (DhGW2)

47 >>I never got these prank things. It seems like it only takes a prank against one unhinged lunatic for something to go wrong.
===

Well, what's the lunatic going to do here, murder an animatronic projectile vomiting remote control robot baby?

Posted by: looking closely at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (TZsWx)

48 Bronies are a thing...

I mean I never believed but they are real.

Posted by: Sven 10077 at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (TE35l)

49 Isn't John Edwards kind of irrelevant now?

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (ven16)

50 27 So they launched a baby buggy into traffic, then scared the crap out of people trying to rescue it? Sounds kind of crummy. ------- Sounds like a wet dream

Posted by: John Edwards at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (Aif/5)

51 I never got these prank things. It seems like it only takes a prank against one unhinged lunatic for something to go wrong. Well, as for the "unhinged lunatic" piece, I don't much care- I'm not going to base my sense of humor on what crazy people might do. I do generally agree with "not getting" the pranks. What makes a "prank" funny, rather than just cruel, is the relationship prankee and pranker have. If you're just "pranking" random people you don't know, you're just a jerk.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:44 PM (PYAXX)

52 33 The anatomical version of the Pillsbury doughboy is just wrong. I mean, he's made out of DOUGH, right?
No skeleton. No innards. Just layer and layer of dough.

Sheesh.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 05:41 PM (dfYL9)

But he has dough balls..so there's that.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:45 PM (yICtd)

53 What if" devil baby" gave someone aheart attack?

Posted by: steevy at January 14, 2014 01:45 PM (zqvg6)

54 21 If I ever get genitalia, I'd hit it.

Posted by: Ken

Dude, she dumped your ass for G I Joe... Posted by: Brother Cavi

pfffft. She said we were sex MACHINES!

Posted by: Transformers at January 14, 2014 01:45 PM (6TB1Z)

"Kids aren't scared by them. They're fascinated," says Freeny, the New York-based artist who's hand-sculpted hundreds of these inner anatomies, built into commercially-available toys, over the last seven years. "I believe that being frightened by inner anatomy is a learned thing. It's something that's taught to kids by society, rather than something that's innate."

-------------------------------------------------

It's to get little kids not to be horrified when they see daddy's guts splattered on the living room floor from daddy being shot resisting IRS agents.

Posted by: Soona at January 14, 2014 01:45 PM (QyfjW)

56 The anatomical version of the Pillsbury doughboy is just wrong. I mean, he's made out of DOUGH, right?

He feels pain, just like you and I do. Oh yes. Yes.

Posted by: The Sadist With the Oven at 450 at January 14, 2014 01:46 PM (8ZskC)

57 @27

Agreed

Posted by: pep at January 14, 2014 01:46 PM (6TB1Z)

58 I think the people who designed the devil baby have more than a slight sadistic streak. At least the flying devil in the park thing was around Halloween. It did not make me laugh to see the AA woman screaming. It's not like people PAID to be scared.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 14, 2014 01:46 PM (7kkQJ)

59 You get used to the screaming, after a while.

Posted by: Hairy Reed at January 14, 2014 01:46 PM (8ZskC)

60 53 What if" devil baby" gave someone aheart attack? ------- Lawsuit!

Posted by: John Edwards at January 14, 2014 01:47 PM (Aif/5)

61 51 I never got these prank things. It seems like it only takes a prank against one unhinged lunatic for something to go wrong.

It would have been funnier if someone drew on and wasted the baby. Big fun.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:47 PM (yICtd)

62 Okay, the LEGO anatomy is particularly awesome. Nice: A living artist who makes something that isn't crap.

Posted by: logprof at January 14, 2014 01:47 PM (X3GkB)

63 27 So they launched a baby buggy into traffic, then scared the crap out of people trying to rescue it?

Sounds kind of crummy.
======

Not quite that bad. Watch the vid.

They left the animatronic "devil baby" unattended in public in its carriage, then sprang it when concerned onlookers (mostly women in the video) went to check it out.

Posted by: looking closely at January 14, 2014 01:47 PM (TZsWx)

64 That pony thing is worse than a Hollywood movie.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:47 PM (DhGW2)

65 45 He's way too happy for somebody with no pecker. Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit at January 14, 2014 05:44 PM (0HooB) ----------------------------- Oh get outa here. The guy's a freaking biscuit. He doesn't want a pecker. He wants butter.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 01:47 PM (dfYL9)

I haven't been to a theater in about 8 years.

I haven't missed anything.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at January 14, 2014 01:48 PM (eGmvn)

67 If that pony thing were a dough nut, even Chris Christie wouldn't eat it.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:48 PM (DhGW2)

68 So they launched a baby buggy into traffic, then scared the crap out of people trying to rescue it? Sounds kind of crummy. Sounds like a good way to get shot.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 14, 2014 01:48 PM (uVkIH)

69 Oh get outa here. The guy's a freaking biscuit. He doesn't want a pecker. He wants butter. Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 05:47 PM (dfYL9) ******** Well that would probably get a rise out of him.

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 01:48 PM (RJMhd)

It's to get little kids not to be horrified when they see daddy's guts splattered on the living room floor from daddy being shot resisting IRS agents.

THIS

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at January 14, 2014 01:49 PM (eGmvn)

71 It would have been funnier if someone drew on and wasted the baby. Big fun.
===

Nobody in NYC has legal concealed carry permits.

If a NYPD police officer did it, he'd probably miss the baby and hit 3 or 4 innocent bystanders.

Posted by: looking closely at January 14, 2014 01:49 PM (TZsWx)

72 From the Producers of Gummies Gone Wild and Smurfette: Legion of Poon comes a thriller to darken your dreams: Raggedy Ann: Sea of Blood.* *This film is not yet rated.

Posted by: Barbie at January 14, 2014 01:49 PM (QupBk)

73 ot quite that bad. Watch the vid.

They left the animatronic "devil baby" unattended in public in its carriage, then sprang it when concerned onlookers (mostly women in the video) went to check it out.

Right. We certainly wouldn't want to encourage that.

Posted by: pep at January 14, 2014 01:49 PM (6TB1Z)

74 He doesn't want a pecker. He wants butter. Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 05:47 PM (dfYL9) In before the Brando jokes!

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 14, 2014 01:49 PM (TIIx5)

75
Matt Damon!!

Posted by: Matt Damon!! at January 14, 2014 01:50 PM (n0DEs)

76 I'm waiting for all the Bronie freaks to show up. You think you know people until they start defending this perversion.

Posted by: Judge Pug at January 14, 2014 01:50 PM (Qev5V)

77 71 It would have been funnier if someone drew on and wasted the baby. Big fun.
===
Nobody in NYC has legal concealed carry permits.

If a NYPD police officer did it, he'd probably miss the baby and hit 3 or 4 innocent bystanders.

Posted by: looking closely at January 14, 2014 05:49 PM (TZsWx)

Point taken. True enough sadly.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:50 PM (yICtd)

78 Well that would probably get a rise out of him. Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew

Big whoop.

Posted by: baking soda at January 14, 2014 01:51 PM (6TB1Z)

79 They should have made it projectile vomit.

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 01:51 PM (RJMhd)

80 Israeli defense minister apologizes to Secretary of State John Kerry saying he 'had no intention to cause any offense to the secretary' - @AFP

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 01:51 PM (1Y+hH)

81 "73 ot quite that bad. Watch the vid. They left the animatronic "devil baby" unattended in public in its carriage, then sprang it when concerned onlookers (mostly women in the video) went to check it out. Right. We certainly wouldn't want to encourage that. Posted by: pep at January 14, 2014 05:49 PM (6TB1Z)" Everyone hating and resenting everyone is simply better. More Progressive.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:52 PM (DhGW2)

82 80 Israeli defense minister apologizes to Secretary of State John Kerry saying he 'had no intention to cause any offense to the secretary' - @AFP

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 05:51 PM (1Y+hH)

Why? Kerry IS an ignorant D-bag.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:53 PM (yICtd)

83 In before the Brando jokes! Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 14, 2014 05:49 PM (TIIx5) Big whoop. Posted by: baking soda at January 14, 2014 05:51 PM (6TB1Z) ******* LOL! yikes.

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 01:53 PM (RJMhd)

84 I'm not gonna lie. The baby wouldn't be the only one in need of a diaper change if I had stumbled upon that prank.

Posted by: no good deed at January 14, 2014 01:53 PM (HsJeN)

85 They left the animatronic "devil baby" unattended in public in its carriage, then sprang it when concerned onlookers (mostly women in the video) went to check it out.
==
Right. We certainly wouldn't want to encourage that.
==

Its not supposed to be a "civics lesson"; its a "startle prank".

Mean. . .sure.

But there is something sort of deliciously evil about baiting a "trap" with a baby!

Posted by: looking closely at January 14, 2014 01:53 PM (TZsWx)

86 @63 I did watch it. At least once the carriage is seen careening thru the streets.

Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 01:53 PM (P6QsQ)

87 If a NYPD police officer did it, he'd probably miss the baby and hit 3 or 4 innocent bystanders. If the bystanders didn't want to get shot, they shouldn't have been loitering by lying on the sidewalk bleeding.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 14, 2014 01:54 PM (TIIx5)

88 Israeli defense minister apologizes to Secretary of State John Kerry saying he 'had no intention to cause any offense to the secretary' - @AFP

"You stupid horse-faced fuck" is a traditional Hebrew greeting that just doesn't translate well.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at January 14, 2014 01:54 PM (8ZskC)

89 Nasty trick. Though, to be fair I've been freaked out enough in my life by my weird little Meanies. This shit I don't need. I've heard blood curdling screams because I popped the wrong Disney movie in.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 14, 2014 01:54 PM (Ec6wH)

90 Israeli defense minister apologizes to Secretary of State John Kerry saying he 'had no intention to cause any offense to the secretary' - @AFP Wouldn't want to give Kerry a reason to be able to get up on his high horse.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 14, 2014 01:54 PM (uVkIH)

91 Why? Kerry IS an ignorant D-bag. Posted by: Guido ' I know, right?

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 01:54 PM (1Y+hH)

92 @79 They did.

Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 01:54 PM (P6QsQ)

93 I just discoved "Horrible Histories" a British history show.

Some are hilarious, some are meh. Enough are funny to keep you clicking on the next one.

They were/are popular enough across the pond to be a bit of a status thing to get the treatment by HH.

Posted by: Retread at January 14, 2014 01:55 PM (cHwk5)

94 And we wonder why people in NYC don't want to help anyone in trouble. This is more sad than anything else.

Posted by: Soona at January 14, 2014 01:55 PM (QyfjW)

95 Kerry and Obama and his whole crew are incompetent assholes,I wish all world leaders would tell them so.

Posted by: steevy at January 14, 2014 01:55 PM (zqvg6)

96 No checkar el bebido en la sidewalka.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 14, 2014 01:55 PM (Ec6wH)

97 92 @79 They did. Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 05:54 PM (P6QsQ) ********* Oh gad--I thought I had the jist of it so I quit. Going back in to view the rest of it.

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 01:56 PM (RJMhd)

98 Kerry and Obama and his whole crew are incompetent assholes,I wish all world leaders would tell them so. I volunteer as tribute!

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:56 PM (PYAXX)

99 The Israeli ambassador probably thought stating the obvious was not an insult.

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 01:56 PM (1Y+hH)

100 Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 14, 2014 05:55 PM (Ec6wH) You're the guy who translated healthcare.gov into spanish, aren't you?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:57 PM (PYAXX)

101 "97 92 @79 They did. Posted by: grammie winger at January 14, 2014 05:54 PM (P6QsQ) ********* Oh gad--I thought I had the jist of it so I quit. Going back in to view the rest of it. Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 05:56 PM (RJMhd)" Yeah. Wouldn't want to miss that.

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:57 PM (DhGW2)

102 You know what's hilarious? Baby Devil Attack causes someone to have a massive heart attack!!

Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 14, 2014 01:57 PM (oFCZn)

103 91 Why? Kerry IS an ignorant D-bag.
Posted by: Guido '

I know, right?

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 05:54 PM (1Y+hH)

Right. and all Obamas done is tell them "you're' on your own Hebes" Seriously. They must feel like they ain't got nobody..

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 01:57 PM (yICtd)

104 Hollywood phones it in because the purpose is to put teenaged asses in those theater seats and make lots of money

LIV youth fill theaters and bank accounts and they watch the most idiotic of the TV shows

If you become a big moneymaker like Clooney, you get to make "thoughtful" vanity projects that lose money but are loved at Oscar time

So what's Clooney's latest original thinking project? A movie about rescuing valuable art from the Nazis.

No Arabs will be shot, so Clooney can claim it's not a ripoff of Raiders of the Lost Ark

Posted by: kbdabear at January 14, 2014 01:57 PM (aTXUx)

105 Oh get outa here. The guy's a freaking biscuit. He doesn't want a pecker. He wants butter. Don't you tell me how to feel!

Posted by: P.D. Boy[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at January 14, 2014 01:57 PM (P7Wsr)

106 Hey Ace what's up? STILL nothin on Lone Survivor????

Posted by: marine43 at January 14, 2014 01:58 PM (5hcL9)

107 I think Romney is going to run again in 2016.

Posted by: Soona at January 14, 2014 01:58 PM (QyfjW)

108 "102 You know what's hilarious? Baby Devil Attack causes someone to have a massive heart attack!! Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at January 14, 2014 05:57 PM (oFCZn)" Darwinism. 'It's good for the gene pool.'

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (DhGW2)

109

Demon Baby flipping the finger was a nice touch.

That animatronics team did a good job with that, I have to say.

Posted by: wheatie at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (9p2Wz)

110 OT - A federal judge has thrown out Oklahoma's ban on same-sex marriage.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (/Crba)

111 Am I the only one that finds that devil baby adorable?

Posted by: I need a cool new sig at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (q177U)

112 Obama certainly does seem to have a soft spot for Shiites.

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (1Y+hH)

113 Right. and all Obamas done is tell them "you're' on your own Hebes" Seriously. They must feel like they ain't got nobody..

I kinda think they're used to it.

Posted by: pep at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (6TB1Z)

114 Yeah. Wouldn't want to miss that. Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 05:57 PM (DhGW2) ********* Well now I am just disappointed they didn't spin its head around. But it did flip off the NYPD.

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (RJMhd)

115 Hey Ace what's up? STILL nothin on Lone Survivor???? 1) I think Ace watches most of his movies via Netflix nowadays. 2) I think we hurt his feelings with one too many "tl;dr" responses to his Movie Review ~~ebooks~~ posts.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 01:59 PM (PYAXX)

116 I've heard blood curdling screams because I popped the wrong ~~Disney~~ movie in. You showed the kids their birthing video, didn't you?

Posted by: P.D. Boy[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at January 14, 2014 02:00 PM (P7Wsr)

117 They left the animatronic
"devil baby" unattended in public in its carriage, then sprang it when
concerned onlookers (mostly women in the video) went to check it out.

I'm mildly surprised the men weren't arrested on suspicious of paedophilia.

Posted by: HR at January 14, 2014 02:00 PM (ZKzrr)

118 There is or was a show on SyFy that was pranks to scare people. One was a woman hired as receptionist to work in a clinic. They did this thing where a pregnant woman is giving birth and it gets more and more obvious that this is some Rosemary's baby thing. Then a midget looking satanic jumps out and chases here around. It sound corny but they really did it well. Rather than panicking, the girl relies on Jesus to save her. She prays to Jesus right there.

Courage sometimes comes when you least expect it.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:00 PM (XUKZU)

119 Okay I'm out before someone asks and answers the Brando details.

Posted by: Teleprompter Feed Crew at January 14, 2014 02:01 PM (RJMhd)

120 "105 Oh get outa here. The guy's a freaking biscuit. He doesn't want a pecker. He wants butter. Don't you tell me how to feel! Posted by: P.D. Boy at January 14, 2014 05:57 PM (P7Wsr)" 'Born that way.' Later, all. God bless. :-)

Posted by: Mirror-Universe Mitt Romney at January 14, 2014 02:01 PM (DhGW2)

121 Really, the flying grim reaper prank was funnier and not some lame movie tie in: http://tinyurl.com/l6qrnol

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 14, 2014 02:02 PM (7kkQJ)

122 106 Hey Ace what's up? STILL nothin on Lone Survivor????
Posted by: marine43 at January 14, 2014 05:58 PM

Maybe he'd like to actually SEE the movie first before writing a review on it

There are open threads where it's been discussed at length

Posted by: kbdabear at January 14, 2014 02:02 PM (aTXUx)

123 OT - A federal judge has thrown out Oklahoma's ban on same-sex marriage.
-
'Cause that's what James Madison meant. We were just too stupid to see for over 200 years.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:02 PM (XUKZU)

124 @116 STUDY: Couples Without Children Have HAPPIER Marriages...but don't get to watch The Little Mermaid 800 times.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at January 14, 2014 02:02 PM (Ec6wH)

125 113 Right. and all Obamas done is tell them "you're' on your own Hebes" Seriously. They must feel like they ain't got nobody..

I kinda think they're used to it.

Posted by: pep at January 14, 2014 05:59 PM (6TB1Z)

Yeah, probably so. They are a resilient, and determined bunch.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 02:02 PM (yICtd)

126 Hey Ace what's up? STILL nothin on Lone Survivor???? Did you like it? I haven't seen it yet.

Posted by: toby928© at January 14, 2014 02:03 PM (QupBk)

127 I think Romney is going to run again in 2016.
-
No, I'm holding out for McCain. No way the electorate will not vote for a war hero centrist.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:03 PM (XUKZU)

128 Now why would they go and do that to poor Pinkie Pie? (Don't judge. I have a four- year-old daughter who loves My Little Pony with a passion. I have more of those damn ponies in my house than I care to admit. And don't even get me started on the Equestria Girls thing!)

Posted by: Mandy P., lurking lurker who lurks at January 14, 2014 02:04 PM (qFpRI)

129 126 Hey Ace what's up? STILL nothin on Lone Survivor???? Did you like it? I haven't seen it yet. The volcano part was awesome.

Posted by: EC at January 14, 2014 02:04 PM (doBIb)

130 Maybe he'd like to actually SEE the movie first before writing a review on it

There are open threads where it's been discussed at length

Posted by: kbdabear at January 14, 2014 06:02 PM (aTXUx)

Wait, by that logic, do I have to start reading the posts before commenting? Fuck me.

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 02:04 PM (yICtd)

131 (Don't judge. I have a four- year-old daughter who loves My Little Pony with a passion. I have more of those damn ponies in my house than I care to admit. And don't even get me started on the Equestria Girls thing!) Word. *fist-bump*

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 02:05 PM (PYAXX)

132 STUDY: Couples Without Children Have HAPPIER Marriages...but don't get to watch The Little Mermaid 800 times. Cars and Monsters Inc!

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at January 14, 2014 02:05 PM (P7Wsr)

133 all Obamas done is tell them "you're' on your own Hebes"
-
But before we negotiate, just hop into the showers.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:05 PM (XUKZU)

134

Marcus Lutrell is going to be on Megyn Kelly's show tonight.

At least I think that's what I heard her say.

Posted by: wheatie at January 14, 2014 02:05 PM (9p2Wz)

135 THUNDER! THUNDER! THUNDERCATS HO!

Posted by: toby928© at January 14, 2014 02:05 PM (QupBk)

136 Fuck me. I don't play requests.

Posted by: It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad Mad Cow[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at January 14, 2014 02:06 PM (P7Wsr)

137 123 WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 06:02 PM (XUKZU)

I think the Glee Mafia is REALLY gonna force SCotUS to either invoke or destroy the 10th amendment....

this is gonna be peachy b/c heteros do not have 100% interchangeability of marriage between states under law.

A marriage once legal is legal, BUT the REQUIREMENTS of marriage are not universal.

Some states require blood tests some don't, some states require waiting periods some don't...

Why should a couple from CT have to get a blood test if Ohio does not require one?

Just sue baby...

Wheeee but hey YOU GUYS GOT THAT COOKIE and now you can stick it to the Bible Thumping Breeders

Posted by: Sven 10077 at January 14, 2014 02:06 PM (TE35l)

138 I do like the way the guy in the yellow coat was totally unfazed by the devil baby.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 02:06 PM (dfYL9)

139 Speaking of old cartoons- You can buy the full D&D Cartoon on Amazon for $5.00- the full series. Of course, tax & shipping make it nearly $10.00, but still, that was an awesome cartoon!

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 02:06 PM (PYAXX)

140 133 all Obamas done is tell them "you're' on your own Hebes"
-
But before we negotiate, just hop into the showers.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 06:05 PM (XUKZU)

Ugh. Right. "I'm king of the world so I'll negotiate for you....trust me."

Posted by: Guido 'H8tr extraordinaire' at January 14, 2014 02:07 PM (yICtd)

141 >>Some are hilarious, some are meh. Enough are funny to keep you clicking on the next one. I'm going to have to give some background English history before we watch more. And not try to eat during any more episodes.

Posted by: Mama AJ at January 14, 2014 02:07 PM (SUKHu)

142 OT - A federal judge has thrown out Oklahoma's ban on same-sex marriage. ------------------- Ooookay. The high priests have consulted the entrails of a chicken and declared the holy will of the gods. What else need be said?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 02:09 PM (dfYL9)

143 126 Hey Ace what's up? STILL nothin on Lone Survivor????

Only thing I didn't like was Johnny Depp as Tonto.

Posted by: Sphynx at January 14, 2014 02:09 PM (OZmbA)

144 Posted by: Sphynx at January 14, 2014 06:09 PM (OZmbA) The volcano scene was a little gratuitous.

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 02:10 PM (PYAXX)

145 I reviewed "Carrie" here: http://bitmaelstrom.blogspot.com/2013/12/carrie.html If you care. (I can't imagine why you would.) It's kind of interesting for all the reasons it doesn't work, I guess.

Posted by: moviegique at January 14, 2014 02:11 PM (7zeA4)

146 My old lady got a skeleton doggy to represent our deceased pooch on Day of the Dead. I asked what she would get if I kicked the bucket. She said "A Hefty-Bag".

Posted by: Ray Van Dune at January 14, 2014 02:12 PM (qIFL7)

147 The volcano scene was a little gratuitous.
-
No, gratuitous was when those three Japanese girls in school uniforms start fighting and rip each other's clothes off.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:12 PM (XUKZU)

148 They made "Carrie" again? Why?

Just no stories left to tell?

Posted by: Sphynx at January 14, 2014 02:13 PM (OZmbA)

149 we have three more years of these people. Three more years

Posted by: thunderb at January 14, 2014 02:13 PM (zOTsN)

150 Ooookay. The high priests have consulted the entrails of a chicken and declared the holy will of the gods. What else need be said? The Salem Witch hunts were totally evil and demonstrate how religion traps your mind into believing things that aren't logical. --Hipster Atheist Douche

Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at January 14, 2014 02:13 PM (P7Wsr)

151 Girl Scout came for her blood as I ordered 14 boxes

Posted by: The Dude at January 14, 2014 02:14 PM (vJdyz)

152 142 Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 06:09 PM (dfYL9)

I am dying to see how the courts try to navigate this precedentary minefield or if they even try...

"because" *bam* law

or

Nope no need to even Look Judge A in Utah YOU ARE A GENIUS and Judge B you too are a genius!

But CJ Roberts we have different justifications for our ruling...

Yup you sure do Good work everyone Eric is pleased...

*bang*

Posted by: Sven 10077 at January 14, 2014 02:14 PM (TE35l)

153 Per the sidebar " Empathy Slander" is funny coming from the left,the lovers of abortion,euthanasia and death panels.

Posted by: steevy at January 14, 2014 02:14 PM (zqvg6)

154

OT - A federal judge has thrown out Oklahoma's ban on same-sex marriage.

-------------------

Ooookay. The high priests have consulted the entrails of a chicken and declared the holy will of the gods. What else need be said?

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 14, 2014 06:09 PM (dfYL9)

-------------------------------------------------

I think Gov. Fallin in going to have to start producing some testosterone and tell the fed court to go fuck themselves.

She'd only be following Dear Leader's precedent.

Posted by: Soona at January 14, 2014 02:15 PM (QyfjW)

155 No, gratuitous was when those three Japanese girls in school uniforms start fighting and rip each other's clothes off. At it again, I see! Bastards!

Posted by: Lena Dunham. at January 14, 2014 02:15 PM (1Y+hH)

156 From Twitter, Toure comes out against jobs as an anti-poverty idea.

Keep thinking there, Toure, that's what you're good at.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:15 PM (XUKZU)

157 No, gratuitous was when those three Japanese girls in school uniforms start fighting and rip each other's clothes off. Only a philistine would say that.

Posted by: toby928© at January 14, 2014 02:15 PM (QupBk)

158 148 They made "Carrie" again? Why? Just no stories left to tell? Someone say my nyaaaaahhhme?

Posted by: John Equus McLurchface at January 14, 2014 02:15 PM (Ec6wH)

159 OT FX says next season of Justifed will be the last.

Posted by: EC at January 14, 2014 02:16 PM (doBIb)

160 What else need be said?

It'll be said here about 7 a.m. (Eastern) tomorrow.

Posted by: HR at January 14, 2014 02:16 PM (ZKzrr)

161 Posted by: moviegique at January 14, 2014 06:11 PM (7zeA4) Good movie review. Thanks. I never saw the original either or the original "Rosemary's Baby" so I don't know why I'd want to see remakes

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at January 14, 2014 02:16 PM (7kkQJ)

162 No, gratuitous was when those three Japanese girls in school uniforms start fighting and rip each other's clothes off.

At it again, I see!

Bastards!

Posted by: Lena Dunham. at January 14, 2014 06:15 PM (1Y+hH)

no shitting on the gaming thread, please

Posted by: The Dude at January 14, 2014 02:16 PM (vJdyz)

163 From Twitter, Toure comes out against jobs as an anti-poverty idea. Wait. What?

Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at January 14, 2014 02:17 PM (PYAXX)

164 From Twitter, Toure comes out against jobs as an anti-poverty idea.

Wait. What?
-
Yeah, on Twitchy.

Posted by: WalrusRex at January 14, 2014 02:17 PM (XUKZU)

165 Ace has been waiting years to make a good Mons joke.

Posted by: garrett at January 14, 2014 02:18 PM (kdtgJ)

166 Wait. What?

You can't expect a black person to work for a paycheck, you racist.

Posted by: HR at January 14, 2014 02:18 PM (ZKzrr)

167 Water boys and pro quarterbacks should make similar salaries. Like brain surgeons and hospital janitors should.

Posted by: Prezzy of the New Collective at January 14, 2014 02:21 PM (1Y+hH)

168 So what's Clooney's latest original thinking project? A movie about rescuing valuable art from the Nazis. No Arabs will be shot, so Clooney can claim it's not a ripoff of Raiders of the Lost Ark Posted by: kbdabear It looks to be a bullshit rip-off of "The Train", which starred Paul Scofield as a German officer getting/stealing French art out of Paris before the Allies arrive, and Burt Lancaster, as the French railroad guy that the Resistance recruits to stop them. Pretty gritty and realistic movie. Pretty good. Clooney, pthath! Pretty man-boy worthless scum sucker.

Posted by: Ribald Conservative riding Orca at January 14, 2014 02:22 PM (RFeQD)

169 I'm going to have to give some background English history before we watch more.

And not try to eat during any more episodes.

Posted by: Mama AJ at January 14, 2014 06:07 PM (SUKHu)

You home-school, don't you? Think of HH as a way to teach with humor, a great alternative to dry, dusty facts and dates. Kids will probably enjoy it.

Posted by: Retread at January 14, 2014 02:22 PM (cHwk5)

170 Water boys and pro quarterbacks should make similar salaries.

It's not fair that Toure gets paid more than a WalMart shelf-stocker. Confiscate all but $8/hr of his income, problem solved!

Posted by: HR at January 14, 2014 02:22 PM (ZKzrr)

171 I thought that Horrible Histories was the funnier British equivalent of Zinn's People's History of the United States.

Posted by: Grey Fox at January 14, 2014 02:22 PM (gVtdw)

172 Water boys and pro quarterbacks should make similar salaries.

Like brain surgeons and hospital janitors should.

Posted by: Prezzy of the New Collective at January 14, 2014 06:21 PM (1Y+hH)

---------------------------------------------

The same for cab drivers and airline pilots.

Posted by: Soona at January 14, 2014 02:23 PM (QyfjW)

173 what will he do in three years who will stop him

Posted by: thunderb at January 14, 2014 02:23 PM (zOTsN)

174 who will stop him Aquaman?

Posted by: garrett at January 14, 2014 02:25 PM (kdtgJ)

175 Posted by: thunderb at January 14, 2014 06:23 PM (zOTsN)

It's all the years after that you have to worry about. They ain't throwing the ratchet away after he's out of office. It's gonna keep on crankin'. Hope that lifts your spirits.

Posted by: kartoffel at January 14, 2014 02:26 PM (07vvi)

176 what will he do in three years

who will stop him

Posted by: thunderb at January 14, 2014 06:23 PM (zOTsN)

-----------------------------------------

Seriously. It's beyond scary now. It's terrifying.

Posted by: Soona at January 14, 2014 02:26 PM (QyfjW)

177 161 -- Thanks! "Rosemary's Baby" is okay in that awful sleazy '70s fashion. Which is to say, competently made but very unpleasant.

Posted by: moviegique at January 14, 2014 02:32 PM (7zeA4)

178

The best devil-baby attack ever was in Peter Jackson's horror comedy, 'Dead Alive'. I laugh out loud thinking about it.

It's a must-see zombie flick. Think lawn mowers versus zombies and you've pretty much captured the whole thing in a single mental image.

Posted by: troyriser at January 14, 2014 02:33 PM (2jF2B)

179 I'm working on a remake movie script. Day Of The Truffles.

Posted by: Meremortal at January 14, 2014 02:36 PM (1Y+hH)

180 Larry Cohen's classic "It's Alive!" trilogy is...well, a thing. "It's Alive!" "It's Alive Again" and "It's Alive 3: Island of the Alive". Heh. And it's also been remade. That's the thing that gets me: They're remaking horror movies that have a small cult following. I mean, they remade William Lustig's "Maniac" with Elijah Wood! And "I Spit On Your Grave"--they even made a sequel to the ISOYG remake! I guess they're successful enough?

Posted by: moviegique at January 14, 2014 02:38 PM (7zeA4)

181 I reviewed "Carrie" here:

http://bitmaelstrom.blogspot.com/2013/12/carrie.html

If you care. (I can't imagine why you would.) It's kind of interesting for all the reasons it doesn't work, I guess.

Posted by: moviegique at January 14, 2014 06:11 PM (7zeA4)

Solid review. I've done a few of them myself over the years, and it's no easy trick to write a worthwhile critique.

As an aside, a freelance writer buddy of mine did a telephonic interview with the actress who played Carrie in the remake, Chloe Grace Moretz, shortly after the first 'Kick-Ass' movie came out. He spoke with her parents at length before the interview so they could check him out (which both he and I took as a good sign of parental oversight). According to my friend, Chloe was an absolute delight, a then-little girl who hadn't let all of the fame and attention go to her head.

I've made it a point to watch her movies since then, although I haven't yet seen the Carrie remake. I'm kind of torn, really. I've boycotted Stephen King books and movies made from them for several years now, when his public, politically oriented statements about people like me made me realize King doesn't like people like me; therefore, no more coin from me going into his pocket.

Posted by: troyriser at January 14, 2014 02:49 PM (2jF2B)

182 Yeah, Moretz did an admirable job. I just never noticed the beautiful girls in school being ostracized no matter how shy or socially awkward. Heh. Your missive gives me hope that she won't turn into one of these modern tragedies of youthful femininity. I stopped reading King in the mid-'80s 'cause he just bored me. Maybe it's just a coincidence but it seemed like a great many of his stories had been written by John Farris just a year or two earlier.

Posted by: moviegique at January 14, 2014 03:06 PM (7zeA4)

183 My Little Bony

Posted by: DANEgerus at January 14, 2014 03:08 PM (e3/KR)

184 When can we do this with real Bronies?

Posted by: Todd Bridges, first to go bad, last to go down at January 14, 2014 04:11 PM (LYMjR)

185

"I believe that being frightened by inner anatomy is a learned thing. It's something that's taught to kids by society, rather than something that's innate."

Kids aren't human-beings they're human-becomings. Basically they're little sociopaths and they lack empathy at early ages. When they develop empathy and realize that the blood-and-guts coming out of something could be their blood-and-guts spewing out, then they start to react with more anxiety and alarm.

Posted by: Speller at January 14, 2014 08:12 PM (J74Py)

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