March 09, 2014
— Open Blogger Chronicles from a Beerslinger
The next installment of that beer odyssey thing...
"64oz. to Freedom"
Okay so it's a rip from Sublime's '40oz. to Freedom' album, but that doesn't fill my growler, so 64oz. it'll have to be. Feel free to play the album along with the writings herein. It was, after all, my muse.
Can there be a better way to enjoy this first balmy weekend in what seems like millennia to many of us, than with some far from serious beer banter?
I'm not bragging when I state I am an epicure, just sayin'. That now said, I do not in any way proclaim to be a connoisseur, and without fault in my beer tastes. Tastes, after all are subjective; and sometimes mostly, arbitrary. That's where your comments come in. I'll insert a fancy science video to embolden my claim, (and make me feel a little scientific on a Sunday morning), that all tastes are unique and singularly subjective. 'Cause I ain't got no time for conflicting points of view.....I step into the great unknown...
Sex, Smell And Science – The Genetics Of Olfactions
Okay so they focus on smell & sex in this study, but this can be relevant to your time here since your sense of smell is the centerpiece to your tastes. This study could also be a good tie in to WeirdDave's human harvesting tutorial in his and Y-not's Gardening thread yesterday...as can beer.
So, gettin' on with it, a fellow Moron suggested, "just stick with the basics man, you know? Styles..." Seemed kinda dull to me at the time, but I'll give it a swig...but I gotta focus on one or two in particular, just to get the writing going. Plus..It's that Lenten season time and I feel the need to bear alms by enlightening others, even if just for one lost beer soul. (It also gives me an excuse to drink beer.)
Lagers
Don't take these unassuming beer styles for granted. This beer deserves R-S-P-C-T! I used to drink lagers only when I didn't want to get into trouble, alas, in my (somewhat) wiser years I've learned, trouble always finds me. So I figure, why not? YOLO as the hipsters a little late to the game are sayin'.
Not to be judgmental, (I'm only human after all), but I find the majority of lager drinkers tend to prefer the volume of beer that they can consume in a session over the alcohol by volume content of the beer itself. You can work out the math on that one. And if you can't, you might just fall over. If that happens, do NOT go back for more! Cameras are everywhere and making an ass of oneself is poor enough, doing it on camera makes it epic, so as an advisor (and for tax reasons), I need to insert this public service announcement...
When it comes to lagers I lean toward the Black Lagers, Imperial Lagers and hoppy Lagers, sometimes referred to as IPL's or Imperial Pale Lagers. What I'm trying' to say right here is that we have a lot of hybrids these days. Relish in it! Be thankful for these feats of innovation. It is capitalism, at it's best, that has allowed such yeasty, hoppy & malty beverages to flourish to new heights, and hypes.
I just so happen to be a capitalistic thinking, beer minded advocate. Only in a capitalistic society do we see people going to great lengths to make things greater; cash into money, coffee into cola, cola into energy drinks, whiskey into anesthesia, dirt brown marijuana into super green hybrid strains sold by our government, coke into crack cocaine, oxycodone into heroin, heroin into a better high with a mixed in pain killer - (on the black market sometimes known as the Ace of Spades, mind you!), a million dollars worth of debt into a trillion, (okay so that's not so much a capitalist model), and brewing mediocre beer into a gorgeously crafted beer with bountiful body and breadth. Anyway, I think you catch my drift. Especially if you're standing in close proximity.
In my quest to find a liking for Lagers, I stumbled upon an Imperial Pale Lager, (IPL moving forward), that I really like. IPLs strive to be, as the name implies, hoppy lagers...with a higher alcohol content. Whenever you see the word 'imperial' you can bet your ass the alcohol content will be higher than in the more traditional styles. So drinker beware.
Hoponius Union by Jack's Abby Brewing is the one that floats my IPL boat right now. I don't have a fancy picture for it. (I broke the bottle.)...and my boat is inflatable. It's got hops and it's got dankness going on. I am, at heart, a hop head, so this beer has my name all over it. Wow! I never thought I'd say that about a lager! Maybe I should file for a name change to beerlager? Nah, that could be taken out of context.
OK, I guess I have to pair it with food now....no pressure.
I'm reaching a little here, but I kinda think I'd definitely enjoy this beer more with a pig foot! Bessie really said it better....
IPA's
India Pale Ales. Unlike the lager above, this is an ale. Brewed at a higher temperature, they offer more flavor. An India Pale Ale is what the letters mean for those that need a little 101'ing.
Gonna go Jai Alai here on you britches. Cigar City, Tampa FL.
Jai Alai offers a citrusy flavor with a hint of pine. Think western hops infused with the pines of the eastern shore. Bold upfront, but invitingly smooth at the finish which gives her a gracious dash of easiness, allowing for clarity in taste and thought.
Yes, I agree, there are a lot of fine IPAs out there. I've been spoiling myself with Bear Republic's Racer X straight outta the tap. Then there's Stone, Ballast Point, Weyerbacher, Bell's, Firestone, and many other fine breweries making just as good an IPA. But I had to zero in on one that was readily available in the cellar.
Doesn't Play well with Friends....
Switching gears to a Russian Imperial Stout
Thirsty Dog's Siberian Night, Imperial Stout. First mistake was over chilling this beer. It came out of the frigidaire like a frozen chocolate mousse cheesecake that just needs some time to sit out. A dessert beer? A goodnight beer. An "I might just get laid" beer. Outta Akron, Ohio, home of the Rubber Bowl & the Good Year Blimp Factory. This beer is heavy and light. Full of great contrasts, it is solid.Thirsty Dog's Siberian Night Imperial Stout won't disappoint.
9.7% ABV, so Lookout!
Because I got a late start and I got other shit to do, although I'd rather keep doing this, I guess it's time to close it up....don't forget to turn your clocks forward....=
Posted by: Open Blogger at
07:30 AM
| Comments (133)
Post contains 1169 words, total size 7 kb.
Posted by: Adam at March 09, 2014 06:39 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 06:39 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 09, 2014 06:41 AM (jucos)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 06:41 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: rickl at March 09, 2014 06:44 AM (sdi6R)
Hey NCJ. Hawaiians luv their Spam. Try some Spam Musubi. Deeelicious
Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 09, 2014 06:45 AM (jucos)
Posted by: mrp at March 09, 2014 06:45 AM (JBggj)
Posted by: Beer Ninja at March 09, 2014 06:46 AM (598AG)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 06:50 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 06:51 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: Beer Ninja at March 09, 2014 07:52 AM (598AG)
Posted by: Wimmenz Studies Major at March 09, 2014 07:53 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 07:54 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: ExSnipe at March 09, 2014 07:54 AM (LKJt3)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 07:54 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: Andy at March 09, 2014 07:55 AM (vGQV1)
Posted by: Adam at March 09, 2014 07:55 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: Ms Kite at March 09, 2014 07:56 AM (1k//7)
Posted by: Truck Monkey, Gruntled New Business Owner at March 09, 2014 07:58 AM (jucos)
Posted by: Beer Ninja at March 09, 2014 08:01 AM (598AG)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:01 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: Foster Brooks at March 09, 2014 08:02 AM (Q6pxP)
Posted by: backhoe at March 09, 2014 08:02 AM (ULH4o)
NCJ?
Both of my wives had what writers call a contralto voice- pitched an octave lower than most women. Men used to telephone them just to hear them talk....
Posted by: backhoe at March 09, 2014 08:06 AM (ULH4o)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:06 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: Beer Ninja at March 09, 2014 08:08 AM (598AG)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:08 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: backhoe at March 09, 2014 08:10 AM (ULH4o)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:13 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:14 AM (At8tV)
I would like some Guinness stout mixed with Pale Ale every now and then. I can get the stout but it is stale and high as hell, but no pale ale.
But I am more into liquor now, which probably needs to change.
Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 09, 2014 08:15 AM (T2V/1)
Posted by: MiketheGrate at March 09, 2014 08:16 AM (FR+ef)
NCJ?
Remember when Duh1!'s second Great Depression was starting all the faux elites carrying on about "how awful it was, people being reduced to eating Spam?"
That sure dried up fast....
Posted by: backhoe at March 09, 2014 08:17 AM (ULH4o)
Posted by: MiketheGrate at March 09, 2014 08:17 AM (FR+ef)
Posted by: Insomniac at March 09, 2014 08:17 AM (UAMVq)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:18 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:18 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: Bill at March 09, 2014 08:18 AM (uvyrw)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:18 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:20 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: MiketheGrate at March 09, 2014 08:20 AM (FR+ef)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:22 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: mrp at March 09, 2014 08:23 AM (JBggj)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:25 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:25 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: PaleRider at March 09, 2014 08:26 AM (FYUWS)
Posted by: shredded chi at March 09, 2014 08:27 AM (OmBt5)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:28 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:30 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: Mr. Dave at March 09, 2014 08:31 AM (/uRce)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:32 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:33 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: model_1066 at March 09, 2014 08:33 AM (KWIwL)
Posted by: Vic at March 09, 2014 12:15 PM (T2V/1)
Agreed.
Black and Tans are more interesting with something more complex than a boring Harp lager.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 09, 2014 08:34 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:34 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 12:32 PM (At8tV)
You don't drink much, do you?
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 09, 2014 08:34 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:35 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: lindafell at March 09, 2014 08:36 AM (PGO8C)
Posted by: model_1066 at March 09, 2014 08:36 AM (KWIwL)
Posted by: shredded chi at March 09, 2014 08:37 AM (OmBt5)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:37 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:38 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:39 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: model_1066 at March 09, 2014 08:40 AM (KWIwL)
Posted by: phreshone at March 09, 2014 08:42 AM (Q6pxP)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 12:39 PM (At8tV)
It thickens the sauce slightly and helps it stick to the wings.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 09, 2014 08:42 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: model_1066 at March 09, 2014 12:40 PM (KWIwL)
you did remember to draw eyeballs on his eyelids, didn't you?
Posted by: phreshone at March 09, 2014 08:43 AM (Q6pxP)
Posted by: model_1066 at March 09, 2014 08:44 AM (KWIwL)
Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 08:45 AM (At8tV)
Posted by: Fritz at March 09, 2014 08:45 AM (PnMCP)
There must be a few adventurous young men posting to the Smart Military Blog who have been to boy's town in Ciudad Acuna or Nuevo Laredo, Mexico and consumed Carta Blanca while dancing with the putas?
In the 50's, Carta Blanca was featured in every whore house in Mexico, and guaranteed to get you laid, or maybe it was the $5? Go to Boy's Town for the beer and stay for the pussy!
Posted by: Doctor Fish at March 09, 2014 08:46 AM (nQjHM)
Posted by: mrp at March 09, 2014 08:47 AM (JBggj)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:47 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:47 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: Adam at March 09, 2014 08:47 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:49 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: lindafell at March 09, 2014 08:50 AM (PGO8C)
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at March 09, 2014 12:34 PM (QFxY5)
You can get a good one at Tommy Condon's Irish Pub in Charleston. Other than the Guinness Stout which they have draft, I don't know what they put in it.
Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 09, 2014 08:50 AM (T2V/1)
Posted by: jeff at March 09, 2014 08:51 AM (LnE5F)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:52 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: Adam at March 09, 2014 12:47 PM (Aif/5)
If you spent months drinking shitty San Magoo in the PI and then had a chance to get pint bottles of Fosters in Australia (fresh) you would love it.
Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 09, 2014 08:53 AM (T2V/1)
Posted by: DangerGirl at March 09, 2014 08:53 AM (GrtrJ)
Posted by: Rolling Rock 33 at March 09, 2014 08:54 AM (65tCu)
Posted by: lindafell at March 09, 2014 08:54 AM (PGO8C)
Posted by: lindafell at March 09, 2014 08:55 AM (PGO8C)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:56 AM (b4joU)
!@#$%^ ncj, that's one to actually miss.
re: drunkest guy ever, that particular back slant may require downers in combination with alcohol. Also if you appear in more than 2 of these clips you get free admission to your first 90 AA meetings... just like everybody else.
Posted by: DaveA[/i][/b][/s] at March 09, 2014 08:56 AM (DL2i+)
Posted by: Lincolntf at March 09, 2014 08:57 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: kartoffel at March 09, 2014 08:58 AM (sWwJZ)
Posted by: Insomniac at March 09, 2014 08:59 AM (UAMVq)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 08:59 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 09:01 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: Adam at March 09, 2014 09:03 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: Lauren at March 09, 2014 09:07 AM (hFL/3)
Posted by: All Hail Eris at March 09, 2014 09:10 AM (QBm1P)
Posted by: Mike in the Hinterlands at March 09, 2014 09:11 AM (DNpio)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at March 09, 2014 09:13 AM (hq5sb)
Posted by: DangerGirl at March 09, 2014 09:13 AM (GrtrJ)
Posted by: ___Diogenes at March 09, 2014 09:14 AM (4CVLy)
Posted by: Mike in the Hinterlands at March 09, 2014 09:14 AM (DNpio)
Surely you jest. As I said above, we can't get shit here. Hell, I have to order sunshine from Amazon for a dollar two ninety eight per photon.
Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 09, 2014 09:15 AM (T2V/1)
Posted by: Adam at March 09, 2014 12:58 PM (Aif/5)
You haven't missed anything.
Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 09, 2014 09:16 AM (T2V/1)
Posted by: Hollowpoint at March 09, 2014 09:16 AM (SY2Kh)
Posted by: boned to the bone at March 09, 2014 09:18 AM (Ph479)
Also, if you can find it, try "Fire Rock", pale ale by Kona Brewing Co. in Hawaii. Very drinkable.
http://tinyurl.com/la2yryu
Posted by: Chi-Town Jerry at March 09, 2014 09:19 AM (b/lt+)
Posted by: DangerGirl at March 09, 2014 09:19 AM (GrtrJ)
Posted by: BumperStickerist at March 09, 2014 09:19 AM (4CVLy)
Posted by: All Hail Eris at March 09, 2014 09:21 AM (QBm1P)
Posted by: DangerGirl at March 09, 2014 09:22 AM (GrtrJ)
Posted by: BumperStickerist at March 09, 2014 09:22 AM (4CVLy)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 09:26 AM (b4joU)
http://www.reddit.com/r/beertrade
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 01:26 PM (b4joU)
Who would want to trade anything for PBR, Miller, or BW?
Posted by: Vic[/i] at March 09, 2014 09:28 AM (T2V/1)
Posted by: beerslinger at March 09, 2014 09:32 AM (b4joU)
Posted by: DangerGirl at March 09, 2014 09:35 AM (GrtrJ)
Posted by: lindafell at March 09, 2014 09:36 AM (PGO8C)
Looking forward to your next installment!
Posted by: Cooch at March 09, 2014 09:43 AM (cddIc)
Posted by: The Hickster at March 09, 2014 09:51 AM (TI3xG)
Posted by: Peppermintpattysclitring at March 09, 2014 10:13 AM (mzD0X)
Posted by: occam's brassiere at March 09, 2014 10:24 AM (V9pSx)
Posted by: Frank Underwood (D-SC) at March 09, 2014 10:41 AM (OpaBw)
Posted by: Big Ol Fat Guy at March 09, 2014 11:27 AM (BpQmM)
Posted by: YTown Guy at March 09, 2014 12:14 PM (das+y)
I've been a fan of Shiner products for a while so another + for the Shiner Black. But Krombacher Dark and even the Brazilian Xingu are better.
I like the hefeweizens and wits about the same as I do good lagers.
Posted by: cuthach at March 10, 2014 06:53 AM (ox1XP)
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Posted by: navycopjoe at March 09, 2014 06:37 AM (At8tV)