February 07, 2014
— Ace And now, delivering a response to the PresidentÂ’s State of the Union, the director of the Gotham Revolutionary Party, Bane.
Greetings, Puny Americans. I am told you have just completed one of your saddest and most pathetic of rituals – gathering around your idiot boxes, getting your dose of electric soma, to watch your president, your ridiculous God of Government, instruct you as to what you should think, and what you should be talking about. As the leader of the Gotham Revolutionary Party, I approve of your weak craving for an authority to rule over you.
But before I address your Mister Obama’s words, perhaps I should introduce myself. My name is Bane. I come from a small nation called Santa Prisca with a rich, colorful culture of riot and slaughter. I am the son of a brutal and cruel revolutionary fighter, what you might call a terrorist. As a small child, I was imprisoned, for my father’s crimes in a savage penal colony with no guards and no rules. My childhood was one of constant fear and violence as I was forced to defend myself daily against the unsavory predations of evil men. As we had no food in the prison, we turned to the most primitive and basic form of agriculture known to mankind – eating our dead. And sometimes, our not-quite-dead.
As NBCÂ’s Political Director Mark Murray might say, my story is really ObamaÂ’s story. Nothing ever came easy for either of us, you know. The rhyming clown Jay-Z once forgot to call Obama on his birthday; I once had my face nailed to a wall. TheyÂ’re really quite the same, arenÂ’t they?
This was humor of course. I was told I should begin with a humorous anecdote. I thought I should also explain this, this black thing on my face.
But now let me turn to the state of the union. I do not come to mock Barack Obama, I come to praise him.
Your Mister Obama presumes that the only guiding force in the world is pure naked power. I approve! Your American democracy is a ridiculous conceit. As George Orwell noted, the true nature of political power is a boot stamping in your face, forever. And forever. And forever more. Your Mister Obama is a weak man, but I admire his brutish instincts as to the true nature of political force.
Let us now turn to your Mister ObamaÂ’s economic theory, similarly untainted by sentiment. Mister Obama believes that the natural state of man is not to create, or to strive, or to build, or to make, but instead to loot wealth from those who are so absurd as to create and strive, and build and make. The natural state of man is not that of a shopkeeper, but as a brigand, as a hijacker, as a thief. Once again, I approve!
Your Mister Obama understands what I learned as a mere lad of seven years, defending myself against cannibalism and rape. Prosperity is an illusion, and an illusion that itself enables other illusions. The illusion of decency . The illusion of self-worth and self-respect. The illusion of progress. The illusion that man is more than animal, that he stands above the beasts and vermin of the fields.
Your Mister Obama is wise to teach Americans that they are not more than animals; that they are in fact, rather less. When you have been sufficiently stripped of your illusions and vanities, you will return to your natural, feral state, violent, unthinking, unreasoning, and easily controlled by stronger animals.
Once again, I approve!
Your Mister Obama also mentioned some kind of new investment bond for the poor. Something his speechwriters have told him to call “MyRA.” Here are my thoughts on this: I could give a shit less. I mean, come on. This is fodder for dummies.
In conclusion, puny Americans, the state of your unionÂ… is decadent! Your pathetic civilization shall not endure. No civilization ever does. For within each civilization are agents of chaos, and fear, and misery, and stupidity, and base instinct, who always seek to drag it down to their brutish level.
And, Puny Americans: You have elected such men to lead you! To lead you down into the pit. Whence I arose, so shall you sink.
Thank you for your time, and please watch Justified on FX. ItÂ’s got guns, hillbillies, and heroin. ItÂ’s like Duck Dynasty except they shoot people. I just enjoy it, you know.
Posted by: Ace at
11:54 AM
| Comments (269)
Post contains 765 words, total size 5 kb.
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at February 07, 2014 11:57 AM (8ZskC)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 07, 2014 11:57 AM (44jNh)
Posted by: Y-not at February 07, 2014 12:00 PM (zDsvJ)
Posted by: dillhole13 at February 07, 2014 12:00 PM (uURnG)
Posted by: boulder toilet hobo at February 07, 2014 12:00 PM (iQxYV)
Posted by: shredded chi - cereal killer at February 07, 2014 12:00 PM (jRs7b)
Posted by: Caliban at February 07, 2014 12:00 PM (DrC22)
Posted by: Gmac at February 07, 2014 12:01 PM (4pjhs)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 07, 2014 12:01 PM (44jNh)
Posted by: eleven at February 07, 2014 12:02 PM (Hy7dS)
Is it true Skittles and Ice Tea is the national dish?
Posted by: [/i]andycanuck[/b] at February 07, 2014 12:02 PM (LLfr9)
Drink!
*hoists glass*
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at February 07, 2014 12:02 PM (8ZskC)
That's how you should have ended it, ace!!!!!
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:02 PM (GQ8sn)
Posted by: Fourth Horseman at February 07, 2014 12:02 PM (GKF3X)
Posted by: Andes plane crash survivors at February 07, 2014 12:03 PM (R5Pm3)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humantiarian at February 07, 2014 12:03 PM (HVff2)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at February 07, 2014 12:03 PM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Caliban at February 07, 2014 12:03 PM (DrC22)
Posted by: Senator Harry Reid at February 07, 2014 12:03 PM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Gmac at February 07, 2014 12:03 PM (4pjhs)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 07, 2014 12:04 PM (44jNh)
I'd take Bane over the current joker occupying the White House.
That's Bane, not Boehn, which I suspect would be wearing a much oranger mask.
Posted by: Matt at February 07, 2014 12:04 PM (vDEpI)
Posted by: Ice-T at February 07, 2014 12:04 PM (Aif/5)
Posted by: Travelocity Gnome in Sochi at February 07, 2014 12:05 PM (3ZtZW)
Posted by: Peggy Joseph [/i] at February 07, 2014 12:05 PM (O7Q1u)
Posted by: WalrusRex at February 07, 2014 12:06 PM (+nlRc)
Posted by: AMDG at February 07, 2014 12:06 PM (t7OO0)
Posted by: Senator Harry Reid at February 07, 2014 12:06 PM (RJMhd)
Posted by: alexthechick - Come to us, oh mighty SMOD at February 07, 2014 12:06 PM (VtjlW)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humantiarian at February 07, 2014 12:06 PM (HVff2)
This Bane character is the hero?
It's going to be a block buster, bigger than Mad Max, bigger than Hunger Games.
Posted by: J. U. Pavik at February 07, 2014 12:07 PM (T0S3Y)
As NBCÂ’s Political Director Mark Murray might say, my story is really ObamaÂ’s story. Nothing ever came easy for either of us, you know. The rhyming clown Jay-Z once forgot to call Obama on his birthday; I once had my face nailed to a wall. TheyÂ’re really quite the same, arenÂ’t they?
Cut. Jib. Every fucking newsletter EVER.
Now someone needs to get Loki to write one. And then Khan.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:07 PM (4df7R)
Posted by: tasker at February 07, 2014 12:07 PM (RJMhd)
Posted by: troyriser at February 07, 2014 12:08 PM (gNlvW)
Still no chimichanga 'though.
Posted by: WalrusRex at February 07, 2014 04:06 PM (+nlRc)
Please don't say you fucked a horse.
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:08 PM (GQ8sn)
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 12:08 PM (naUcP)
Out with it--
how did you do it?
Bleach or piss on the tires?
Posted by: tasker at February 07, 2014 04:07 PM (RJMhd)
Or virgin sacrifice to the snow gods?
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:08 PM (4df7R)
Posted by: alexthechick - Come to us, oh mighty SMOD at February 07, 2014 12:09 PM (VtjlW)
Because, y'know, it's important. For verisimilitude.
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 04:08 PM (naUcP)
I've got Harley Quinn covered...
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:09 PM (GQ8sn)
Posted by: --- at February 07, 2014 12:09 PM (MMC8r)
Bane was able to stand up as a leader of the Occupy movement because by the standards of good and evil prevalent before the last few years he, and the Occupy movement, are both evil.
Hell, Soros is a better example though. The man is a Bond villain down to having a NAZI connection in WWII.
Posted by: 18-1 at February 07, 2014 12:09 PM (P3U0f)
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 12:09 PM (naUcP)
I think Bane and Lord Humongous, The Ayatollah of RocknRolla and Master of the Wastelands, have a great deal in common. They should get together sometime, do some timely political commentary. I understand MSNBC is looking for a few good white people.
Posted by: troyriser at February 07, 2014 04:08 PM (gNlvW)
MSNBC is just interested in getting shots of men in assless chaps.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 07, 2014 12:09 PM (TIIx5)
Posted by: --- at February 07, 2014 04:09 PM (MMC8r)
He's a staple at the Folsom Street Fair.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:10 PM (4df7R)
Speaking of Justified, was there any discussion of what Art was doing when he was in his car in the most recent episode?
No, it wasn't that, and it doesn't involve cheese, you perverts.
I'm being vague because, spoiler alert, I don't want to call it a spoiler alert, because it's not important enough that it's spoiling anything.
But I still don't want to say. I just thought it was interesting of them to allow it on the show.
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 12:10 PM (TOk1P)
Posted by: alexthechick - Come to us, oh mighty SMOD at February 07, 2014 12:10 PM (VtjlW)
Bane/Voldemort '16
To hell with this lesser evil crap!
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 04:09 PM (naUcP)
Hell, why not? LIB, baby!
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:10 PM (4df7R)
Posted by: David Brooks at February 07, 2014 12:11 PM (A+/8k)
Posted by: tasker at February 07, 2014 12:11 PM (RJMhd)
http://bit.ly/1aEusrU
Posted by: alexthechick - Come to us, oh mighty SMOD at February 07, 2014 04:10 PM (VtjlW)
*coooo* The twinkle in his eyes makes me oh so very,v ery happy. *COOOO*
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:11 PM (4df7R)
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 12:11 PM (naUcP)
Or virgin sacrifice to the snow gods?
Posted by: andycanuck at February 07, 2014 04:11 PM (LLfr9) /i]
That would certainly provide an unlimited supply of virgins...
*BA DUM BUM TSSS!*
Thank you! I'll be here all week!
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:13 PM (4df7R)
Posted by: eleven at February 07, 2014 12:13 PM (Hy7dS)
http://youtu.be/48DRGDiKo2U
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 04:11 PM (naUcP)
Angie's got ridiculous boobs.
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:13 PM (GQ8sn)
Posted by: Brother Cavil at February 07, 2014 12:13 PM (naUcP)
Posted by: The AoSHQ Automatic Obvious Response Generator at February 07, 2014 04:11 PM (8ZskC)
"I say, old chap, I am not assless! I have a fine ass!"
-Some British guy
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit [/s][/i][/b][/u] at February 07, 2014 12:14 PM (4df7R)
Posted by: Jollyroger at February 07, 2014 12:14 PM (t06LC)
Posted by: DaveinNC at February 07, 2014 12:15 PM (boNGU)
Posted by: tasker at February 07, 2014 12:15 PM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at February 07, 2014 12:15 PM (XrGnJ)
Posted by: Biff Boffo at February 07, 2014 12:15 PM (YmPwQ)
Posted by: Barky O at February 07, 2014 04:14 PM (FcR7P)
No Barry, I do!
Posted by: Reggie Love at February 07, 2014 12:16 PM (JpC1K)
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 12:16 PM (TOk1P)
***
I wonder if this could be a deal breaker for the leftist-islamist alliance?
The former are ok with Salafists killing American soldiers but dogs...?
Posted by: 18-1 at February 07, 2014 12:17 PM (P3U0f)
That made me laugh out loud.
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:18 PM (/Mxso)
Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 07, 2014 12:18 PM (op9Rd)
When do we get a link to ace's dramatic reading of this speech?
Posted by: bonhomme at February 07, 2014 03:57 PM (44jNh)
10 minutes of dramatically chanting "yub-yub" in Bane's voice is bizarre, even for the HQ.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 07, 2014 12:18 PM (TIIx5)
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:19 PM (/Mxso)
Posted by: The Donner Party at February 07, 2014 12:20 PM (A0sHn)
He's complaining about the smell but holding up okay so far.
Posted by: [/i]andycanuck[/b] at February 07, 2014 12:20 PM (LLfr9)
Posted by: Misanthropic Humantiarian at February 07, 2014 12:20 PM (HVff2)
I just realized that the problem in this country is that instead of a social safety net we've created a social hammock
Yes I thought of that myself
Posted by: MAx at February 07, 2014 12:20 PM (b7yum)
Posted by: Croaker at February 07, 2014 12:21 PM (leNBy)
Posted by: The Donner Party at February 07, 2014 04:20 PM (A0sHn)
You had ONE job.
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:21 PM (/Mxso)
Posted by: garrett at February 07, 2014 12:21 PM (iUMdy)
Posted by: JackStraw at February 07, 2014 12:22 PM (g1DWB)
Posted by: Khan at February 07, 2014 12:22 PM (tVroA)
Posted by: Teh Most Interesting Man at February 07, 2014 12:23 PM (dTh2r)
Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 07, 2014 04:18 PM (op9Rd)
The more time I spend with people, the more I appreciate my horses and dogs!
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:23 PM (o3MSL)
Yeah that was fun.
But did you catch at the end I had to suffer through talking to that shit-head, Holder?
Posted by: Chief Deputy Art Mullen at February 07, 2014 12:23 PM (R5Pm3)
>>>>I just realized that the problem in this country is that instead of a social safety net we've created a social hammock
Yes I thought of that myself
You've thought about this carefully. So carefully, you missed that everyone's been saying that since 2004. Try this: Its a Trampoline now.
Posted by: Bigby's Frostbitten Hands at February 07, 2014 12:23 PM (3ZtZW)
Posted by: HR at February 07, 2014 12:24 PM (ZKzrr)
Posted by: Mindy at February 07, 2014 12:24 PM (mQwL2)
Posted by: Khan at February 07, 2014 12:24 PM (tVroA)
Posted by: Mitt at February 07, 2014 12:24 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Zombie Mendoza at February 07, 2014 12:24 PM (iUMdy)
The state or your union is shame. The choice of that washed up little asscrack weasel Jim Carey to portray ME can be described no other way.
I claim vengeance on all who participated in the making and viewing of such a farcical, insulting abomination. This shameful display will not go unpunished.
Posted by: The Riddler at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (SY2Kh)
That was a majorly awful movie, though. Bane makes one Occupy speech and the whole town goes gay for him? And then all of the police in the city decide to run into a tunnel where they can be sealed off. And when the police try to engage in battle they use British Revolutionary War Tactics of running at the enemy in rank and file.
And there's just, like, a line of dialog to explain "we put splosive in all the concrete in a scene off camera". And a big twist reveal that was just stoopid.
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (A0sHn)
Posted by: The Humungus at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (Q6pxP)
Posted by: Turnip Defense League [/i] at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (O7Q1u)
Posted by: eleven at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (Hy7dS)
Posted by: MAx at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (b7yum)
Posted by: RWC at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (fWAjv)
>>>>My name is Bane. I come from a small nation called Santa Prisca with a rich, colorful culture of riot and slaughter
The Gotham Revolutionary Party supports FOREIGNERS in elected office!
- Gotham GOP, missing the forest for the trees
Posted by: Bigby's Frostbitten Hands at February 07, 2014 12:26 PM (3ZtZW)
Posted by: Dack Thrombosis at February 07, 2014 12:27 PM (oFCZn)
Posted by: General Stormin' Norman Schwarzkopf at February 07, 2014 12:28 PM (Q6pxP)
Re: Costas approval of Putin
Bob Costas should stick to sports because he doesn't know what the hell he's talking about.
-John F'n McCain on Cavuto
Posted by: Doctor Fish at February 07, 2014 12:28 PM (nQjHM)
@121
He makes a speech and the masses go Occupy. We've been in the same country for the last 5 years right? Is it really so crazy?
Posted by: Jollyroger at February 07, 2014 12:28 PM (t06LC)
Posted by: Bainbridge Colby at February 07, 2014 12:28 PM (e8kgV)
Posted by: Soona at February 07, 2014 12:28 PM (EecJi)
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 04:26 PM (A0sHn)
In the defense of the writers, even the barest mention of getting other people's shit served up to you by authoritarian force easily mobilizes the FSA.
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:28 PM (/Mxso)
Posted by: Herman Melville at February 07, 2014 12:29 PM (g1DWB)
Posted by: RWC at February 07, 2014 04:26 PM (fWAjv)
That "dark" vein sounds racist to me!
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:29 PM (o3MSL)
That is all....
Posted by: backhoe at February 07, 2014 12:29 PM (ULH4o)
Posted by: Judge Pug at February 07, 2014 12:29 PM (NRYdU)
And good looks, of course.
Posted by: West at February 07, 2014 12:29 PM (1Rgee)
The GOP nom was yours for the asking, you big wuss. You chickened out on the chance to be Mr. Historic, and you can't deal with it. Not my problem.
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 12:30 PM (6TB1Z)
Posted by: sans_sheriff at February 07, 2014 12:30 PM (Lljg2)
So the movie technical adviser was pretty sharp.
Posted by: J. U. Pavik at February 07, 2014 12:30 PM (T0S3Y)
That is all....
Posted by: backhoe at February 07, 2014 04:29 PM (ULH4o)
You must be great at parties.
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:30 PM (/Mxso)
Posted by: Judge Pug at February 07, 2014 12:31 PM (NRYdU)
OT, but hordeworthy: one of my animal rights nut friends posted this just now,
Orangutans: Captured, killed, even used as prostitutes
http://tinyurl.com/bfd6jbg
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 12:31 PM (A0sHn)
Posted by: eleven at February 07, 2014 12:31 PM (Hy7dS)
Posted by: shredded chi - cereal killer at February 07, 2014 12:31 PM (jRs7b)
Posted by: Reggie Love at February 07, 2014 12:31 PM (oFCZn)
That is all....
Posted by: backhoe at February 07, 2014 04:29 PM (ULH4o)
Didn't Ace have an epic rant (with bannings) about this not that long ago?
Posted by: Turnip Defense League [/i] at February 07, 2014 12:32 PM (O7Q1u)
The guys finally get shirts?
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:32 PM (GQ8sn)
Posted by: Edward James Olmos, a.k.a. "The Riddler," at February 07, 2014 12:32 PM (R6JT1)
Posted by: navybrat at February 07, 2014 12:32 PM (AW7Gr)
Posted by: Bane at February 07, 2014 12:32 PM (/Crba)
OT, but hordeworthy: one of my animal rights nut friends posted this just now, Orangutans: Captured, killed, even used as prostitutes
http://tinyurl.com/bfd6jbg
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 04:31 PM (A0sHn)
I can't BELIEVE that some rat bastard would capture and kill orangutans.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 07, 2014 12:33 PM (TIIx5)
Posted by: kbdabear at February 07, 2014 12:33 PM (aTXUx)
Thank you for reminding us for the 843rd time that you do not watch TV or pay any attention to pop culture or mass media entertainment, backhoe.
Feel free to once again pat yourself on the back, and take care not to fall off your pedestal while you do so.
Posted by: Hollowpoint at February 07, 2014 12:33 PM (SY2Kh)
Posted by:Bainbridge Colby at February 07, 2014 04:28 PM (e8kgV)
They didn't build that, so rightly the "village" should share in their ill-gotten gains!
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:34 PM (o3MSL)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 07, 2014 12:34 PM (8ifMA)
>>>>automatically tune out anything that refs TV,
movies, comics, or anything else associated with modern "culture."
Someone *else* is taking him for partners in Charades.
Not.Me.Not.This.Time.
Posted by: Bigby's Frostbitten Hands at February 07, 2014 12:34 PM (3ZtZW)
143 -
Powell might have gotten the nomination, but he never would have been elected. If I recall it was his wife who discouraged him from running.
Must be she knows something the rest of us don't. My guess: he's gay.
So... here we are, it's 2016. Is American ready for its first black, ex-General, gay President? Sure, all he has to do is make a big stink about switching parties. And kick Hillary in the nutz, of course, but I don't think he'd have any trouble doing so, if he chooses.
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 12:34 PM (TOk1P)
How do I turn it off, the fuckers.
They're gonna hold my tool bar hostage until I 'donate', the fuckers.
They said it was free, the fuckers.
Posted by: J. U. Pavik at February 07, 2014 12:35 PM (T0S3Y)
Posted by: Javems at February 07, 2014 04:32 PM (nTgAI)
Being a Minion is a lot easier!
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:35 PM (o3MSL)
It was getting busted for cheating with another woman.
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:35 PM (GQ8sn)
http://tinyurl.com/bfd6jbg
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 04:31 PM (A0sHn)
--------------------------------------
Clyde hardest hit.
Posted by: Soona at February 07, 2014 12:35 PM (EecJi)
Are these, .50 cal? I've got nothing to shoot these with. What am I gonna do, insert them manually???
Posted by: Henchman on Bane's left at February 07, 2014 12:35 PM (R5Pm3)
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 12:36 PM (A0sHn)
How do I turn it off, the fuckers.
They're gonna hold my tool bar hostage until I 'donate', the fuckers.
They said it was free, the fuckers.
Uninstall FF and then reinstall.
Posted by: EC at February 07, 2014 12:36 PM (GQ8sn)
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 04:35 PM (o3MSL)
------------------------------------------
This is true. You don't have to go to all the classes.
Posted by: Soona at February 07, 2014 12:37 PM (EecJi)
Hey, a guy has to make a living for his family you know, and those Police Academy residuals aren't paying off like they used to.
Posted by: Steve G at February 07, 2014 12:37 PM (SY2Kh)
Posted by: Frumious Bandersnatch at February 07, 2014 04:36 PM (A0sHn)
I'd call that "inevitable".
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:37 PM (/Mxso)
It was indeed his wife, or at least that's what he said at the time.
Your assertion about his unelectability is unsupported. He was extremely popular after DS, and say what you will about the man, he is extremely smooth and articulate. Charming, even. Almost a perfect politician, which is why he was where he was. Plus, black.
I think he would have won in a walk.
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 12:38 PM (6TB1Z)
162 -
And yet, here you are, Hollowpoint, being a dick about it. Imagine that. Hollowpoint being a dick.
We must be on planet Earth.
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 12:38 PM (TOk1P)
special effects.
Posted by: J. U. Pavik at February 07, 2014 12:38 PM (T0S3Y)
Posted by: Creeky at February 07, 2014 12:39 PM (sHVDX)
Powell might have gotten the nomination, but he never would have been elected. If I recall it was his wife who discouraged him from running.
Must be she knows something the rest of us don't. My guess: he's gay.
So... here we are, it's 2016. Is American ready for its first black, ex-General, gay President? Sure, all he has to do is make a big stink about switching parties. And kick Hillary in the nutz, of course, but I don't think he'd have any trouble doing so, if he chooses.
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 04:34 PM (TOk1P)
As I recall, Alma Powell nixed his Presidential aspirations because she was utterly convinced that some white racist would whack him if he became the first black POTUS.
General Colitis is a has-been who doesn't have a chance in hell of gaining the Donk nomination if he were to try. Serving so prominently in Dubya's admin would be a non-starter for most Donks.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 07, 2014 12:40 PM (TIIx5)
Posted by: Guy who sounds stupid doing a Bane impersonation[/i][/b][/i][/b][/s][/s] at February 07, 2014 12:40 PM (8ifMA)
Posted by: L, elle at February 07, 2014 12:40 PM (Cuj/g)
169 and 178 -
I'm not buying it. He had a skeleton in his closet. Nobody's wife discourages him from being coronated King of America.
Certainly not for having boinked another woman. Clinton already proved you could be elected AND re-elected in spite of having that on your resume.
That's why I suspect it's boys in his closet. Or men. Whatever. Plus, he always seemed squishy to me.
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 12:41 PM (TOk1P)
Are these, .50 cal? I've got nothing to shoot these with. What am I gonna do, insert them manually???
Posted by: Henchman on Bane's left at February 07, 2014 04:35 PM (R5Pm3)
--------------------------------------------------
They're for his AR15 shotgun.
Posted by: Soona at February 07, 2014 12:41 PM (EecJi)
Posted by: navybrat at February 07, 2014 12:42 PM (AW7Gr)
Posted by: Turnip Defense League [/i] at February 07, 2014 12:42 PM (O7Q1u)
Posted by: Mitt at February 07, 2014 12:43 PM (0FSuD)
Er, why am I wearing these huge bullets on my vest?
Are these, .50 cal? I've got nothing to shoot these with. What am I gonna do, insert them manually???
Posted by: Henchman on Bane's left at February 07, 2014 04:35 PM (R5Pm3)
He was the guy shooting cops with the Barrett earlier in the movie before Gordon gets shot in the sewers, while wearing the same web gear.
Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 07, 2014 12:43 PM (TIIx5)
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 04:41 PM (TOk1P)
-----------------------------------------------------
Duh! Ya think?
Posted by: Soona at February 07, 2014 12:43 PM (EecJi)
Try as I might, I cannot get over the amount of really though-provoking (and funny) material Ace manages to produce on a pretty regular basis.
Ace, is this enough to get me the platinum membership?
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:43 PM (o3MSL)
If Ace did I missed it. I came from what passes for an upper-class family here but I got down in the gutter a while.
Rode Big Bikes on the street, smoked some dope. Hopped some bars. Yeah, I was young and foolish. Tears? Got 'em in spades....
Yet? The things I see on magazines in checkout lines are just so stunningly stupid and trivial it embarrasses even me. Have we really gotten so stupid and Maroonish?
I got myself out of the gutter when I married my first Dead Wife- nothing like having another's life in your hands to straighten you up. America seems to have fallen into one- and "can't get up." Damnation....
Posted by: backhoe at February 07, 2014 12:44 PM (ULH4o)
Posted by: Sean Bannion [/i][/s][/u][/b] at February 07, 2014 12:44 PM (yz6yg)
Posted by: Joker at February 07, 2014 12:45 PM (X866z)
As it turns out, he is a gigantic squish. However, he was clever enough to keep everyone guessing as to what he really thought, me included, so that everyone did what they did with Obama and projected their desires onto him. That's why he would have won. He'd have gotten both GOP and Dem votes. It certainly helped to be one of the 3 people most associated with a resounding military victory.
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 12:45 PM (6TB1Z)
Posted by: steevy at February 07, 2014 12:45 PM (zqvg6)
Your old lady needed somebody to give her one.
Posted by: Steve G at February 07, 2014 12:46 PM (SY2Kh)
Posted by: Mitt at February 07, 2014 12:46 PM (0FSuD)
Posted by: BurtTC at February 07, 2014 12:46 PM (TOk1P)
Oh, I guess I didn't (and don't) get that.
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 12:47 PM (6TB1Z)
Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 07, 2014 12:47 PM (op9Rd)
That is all....
Posted by: backhoe. at February 07, 2014 04:29 PM (ULH4o)
Yes we're aware. Especially since you feel the need to make us aware of this fact in every single thread that references any of those things, or anytime someone makes a comment in a thread referencing them.
Posted by: buzzion at February 07, 2014 12:47 PM (LI48c)
Posted by: Mitt at February 07, 2014 04:46 PM (0FSuD)
Now that you mention it, H-E-double-toothpicks, no!
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:47 PM (o3MSL)
Posted by: Joker at February 07, 2014 04:45
Tell me about it.
Posted by: The Donner Party at February 07, 2014 12:48 PM (A0sHn)
You guys take this bad movie stuff 'way too seriously.
It's more like Mystery Science Theater 3000 for me, where you sit and heckle the movie, the actors, the director, the sound, the sound system, the theater, the audience.
Until words are exchanged, someone throws someone's popcorn in their face, and gets shot.
Posted by: J. U. Pavik at February 07, 2014 12:48 PM (T0S3Y)
Posted by: Fourth Horseman at February 07, 2014 12:48 PM (GKF3X)
Posted by: Mitt at February 07, 2014 04:46 PM (0FSuD)
Now that you mention it, H-E-double-toothpicks, no!
You know who else didn't drink? Hitler, that's who.
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 12:49 PM (6TB1Z)
Posted by: backhoe at February 07, 2014 12:49 PM (ULH4o)
Regardless of your reasoning, it's generally frowned upon to stroll into a thread based on modern culture, movies and comics and write nothing but how you don't partake in modern culture movies and comics because it's garbage.
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:49 PM (/Mxso)
So Bain grew up on the mean streets of Searchlight, a few doors down from Harry Reid?
Posted by: Stu-22 at February 07, 2014 12:49 PM (AiYlm)
Posted by: Sean Bannion [/i][/s][/u][/b] at February 07, 2014 12:50 PM (yz6yg)
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 04:49 PM (6TB1Z
You know why he didn't drink don't you?
It made him mean.
Posted by: buzzion at February 07, 2014 12:50 PM (LI48c)
Jus' sayin'
Everyone thought it was the Hitler salute, but in fact they were just waving their hands to dispel the fragrance.
Posted by: pep at February 07, 2014 12:51 PM (6TB1Z)
You just earned "ignore."
I'd nuke your BIOS if I knew how to do it. Bastid....
Posted by: backhoe at February 07, 2014 04:49 PM (ULH4o)
That breaks my heart, noob.
Posted by: Heralder at February 07, 2014 12:51 PM (/Mxso)
Sometimes, it is a relief to just be able to talk about the garbage that is modern "culture"!
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 12:52 PM (o3MSL)
Posted by: Furious George at February 07, 2014 12:52 PM (yFb77)
Posted by: Fritz at February 07, 2014 04:22 PM (TKFmG)
--------------
Impossible to listen to, and teh ghey?
Posted by: Stu-22 at February 07, 2014 12:53 PM (AiYlm)
Posted by: buzzion at February 07, 2014 12:54 PM (LI48c)
Jus' sayin'
Posted by: Sean Bannion at February 07, 2014 04:50 PM (yz6yg)
--------------------------------------
The hell? That was Himmler every fucking time.
Posted by: Adolf at February 07, 2014 12:54 PM (EecJi)
CNN not saying bad things about Saddam.
NYT Duranty saying nice things about Stalin.
Three times is a pattern.
Posted by: J. U. Pavik at February 07, 2014 12:55 PM (T0S3Y)
Posted by: AMDG at February 07, 2014 12:55 PM (t7OO0)
Posted by: tasker at February 07, 2014 12:55 PM (RJMhd)
Reference the September 1st, 2013 thread on bannings and the banning policy. If all you have to say on a pop-culture thread is that you don't do pop culture, you should just skip it and go on to the next post. Otherwise, it pissed the Head Ewok right off.
Posted by: Turnip Defense League [/i] at February 07, 2014 12:55 PM (O7Q1u)
Posted by: Yoshi, Aggrieved Victim of the White Man at February 07, 2014 12:55 PM (OzZJn)
Posted by: Hrothgar at February 07, 2014 04:43 PM (o3MSL)
Needs more tongue.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 07, 2014 12:56 PM (QFxY5)
Posted by: Sean Bannion [/i][/s][/u][/b] at February 07, 2014 12:57 PM (yz6yg)
Posted by: Mitt at February 07, 2014 12:57 PM (0FSuD)
But only if you pay them. Or afterwards, if'n you don't pay them.
Not that I'd know or anything.
Posted by: Headless Dick Montomery at February 07, 2014 12:57 PM (1Rgee)
Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 07, 2014 12:58 PM (tmFlQ)
Posted by: Sean Bannion [/i][/s][/u][/b] at February 07, 2014 12:58 PM (yz6yg)
Backhoe, this is Vic.
Vic, this is Backhoe.
So....how about those rough-riders!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 07, 2014 12:58 PM (QFxY5)
Posted by: Whoopi Goldberg [/i][/s][/u][/b] at February 07, 2014 12:59 PM (yz6yg)
Posted by: the littl shyning man at February 07, 2014 01:00 PM (tmFlQ)
Posted by: boulder toilet hobo at February 07, 2014 01:00 PM (iQxYV)
Posted by: Judge Pug at February 07, 2014 01:03 PM (NRYdU)
Posted by: The Donner Party at February 07, 2014 01:03 PM (A0sHn)
Posted by: DC in Towson at February 07, 2014 01:04 PM (eQJwb)
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 07, 2014 01:10 PM (pFqpP)
Posted by: Meremortal at February 07, 2014 01:12 PM (jTKU5)
Posted by: DC in Towson at February 07, 2014 01:12 PM (eQJwb)
Posted by: Something Clever at February 07, 2014 01:26 PM (PhmlQ)
Himmler?...I thought it was that fat fuck Goebbels...
Posted by: Hess at February 07, 2014 01:30 PM (ahBY0)
Posted by: Sandra Fluke at February 07, 2014 01:32 PM (dvRYt)
Posted by: Lord Humongus' Minion at February 07, 2014 01:33 PM (nbGZj)
Posted by: DrDrill at February 07, 2014 01:39 PM (sOFZs)
Posted by: Mooch at February 07, 2014 01:44 PM (611Rk)
Posted by: Ice T in 2016 at February 07, 2014 01:55 PM (E8IHS)
Posted by: Khan at February 07, 2014 02:00 PM (wy5e7)
Posted by: Teh Most Interesting Man at February 07, 2014 08:29 PM (dTh2r)
Posted by: ron n. at February 08, 2014 03:09 AM (c7HxG)
Posted by: furious at February 08, 2014 03:38 PM (8lw4l)
Posted by: Carol at February 09, 2014 09:11 AM (z4WKX)
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Posted by: Y-not at February 07, 2014 11:57 AM (zDsvJ)