April 10, 2014
— Ace You know, the racist.
Stephen Colbert, the host of Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report," will succeed David Letterman as the host of "The Late Show," CBS Corp. CBS -2.52% announced on Thursday.
CBS said in a statement that it had signed a five-year agreement with Mr. Colbert to take over its flagship show when Mr. Letterman retires next year.Mr. Colbert will retire the character he plays on his Comedy Central show--a send-up of Republican talk-show hosts--and will be himself as the host of the CBS show, the company said.
Craig Ferguson meanwhile has what's apparently called a "Prince of Wales" clause that guarantees him the show upon Letterman's retirement. However, that guarantee isn't solid; CBS can just pay a hefty penalty to him if they don't give him the show.
So I guess they'll be doing that, and I guess Ferguson becomes a free agent, and might just retire.
I imagined CBS might have trouble imagining Ferguson as an 11:30 host (although I'm not really sure there's such a terrific difference between an 11:30 show and a 12:30 one).
But then I don't see how you give Ferguson the middle finger in order to hire a different oddball with a narrow appeal and a weird vibe.
Ferguson's weird vibe is both more original and less alienating than Colbert's own weird vibe. Sure, Ferguson's show is essentially Pee Wee's Playhouse, as hosted by a recovering-alcoholic Scotsman. But the weirdness -- involving puppets, gay skeleton robots, and pantomime horses -- wasn't the sort of weirdness with an animus towards anyone.
Colbert says he'll be playing himself on the new show. Well, fine... but I've never seen Colbert play himself before. I've seen him play (very well, I have to admit) the strange homophobic gay history teacher Chuck Noblet on Strangers with Candy, and I've seen him play a strange mutant Bill-O'Reilly-As-Glimpsed-in-Progressive-Nightmares character on clips from the Colbert Report.
Basically I've seen him play a lot of strange characters. I assume there's a reason for that, that that's his metier.
What evidence does CBS have that the real Colbert will play with a large audience?
Okay, One Last Point: Sorry to be campaigning so hard for Ferguson, even after it's too late to matter.
But here you go.
An 11:30 host has been thought to need two things to succeed.
First, he had to be funny, obviously.
But more importantly -- remember, there are a lot of funny guys out there, and very few are asked to host an 11:30 talk show -- he had to be likable, "relatable" (as they say in Hollywood focus groups), and someone the audience had an easy feeling of rapport with.
This is part of the reason there was such a big tumult regarding the Leno vs. Letterman choice NBC made so long ago. Neither man seemed to have Johnny Carson's easy charm. Letterman was odd and often bitter in his humor; Leno was odd and often off-putting in his puppylike need to ingratiate.
Both men were clearly bored during most interviews.
If either man had had that Carson-like Relatability Factor, there would have been no controversy at all.
I don't know who Colbert is as a real person. I've seen him play the Chuck Noblet character and the Mutant Bill O'Reilly character. (And, by the way, the Mutant Bill O'Reilly character is more or less exactly like the Chuck Noblet character, except not gay.)
I have become a fanboy of Ferguson's, however, and not just because he's funny. Oh, the show is funny, sure. But I watch the show because he's likable, and he seems interesting.
So on the likability front, CBS has evidence that Ferguson has it. They have no such evidence (apart from, I guess, some impromptu "test interviews") that Colbert does.
Craig Ferguson Will Net $8 Million for Not Being Hired. $8 million penalty clause if he isn't hired to replace Letterman.
Chickenfeed, really. Letterman's deal with CBS (which NBC would have had to match clause-by-clause if NBC wanted to keep him) included a $50 million penalty clause if his show didn't air at 11:30. (That is, CBS intended to air it at 11:30, so had no problem writing in this huge penalty; but if NBC tried to match the contract (NBC had matching rights, the right to duplicate any third party contract and compel Letterman to sign with them instead of the third party), but keep Letterman on at 12:30, they would have had to pay him $50 million for the privilege.)
Now that I read a few articles (and commenters' posts), it does seem like Ferguson's ratings have taken a big hit, losing audience to Seth Meyers.
How that happened, I have no idea. Before the Fallon/Meyers debut (and I don't expect those high ratings to last), Ferguson's show was getting good ratings and he was building audience.
They Made the Right Choice: You can't top Big Funny like this.
“Simply being a guest on David Letterman’s show has been a highlight of my career,” Colbert said in a statement. “I never dreamed that I would follow in his footsteps, though everyone in late night follows Dave’s lead.”“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go grind a gap in my front teeth,” he quipped.
Bazinga.
It's possible Ferguson just didn't want the show that much. He's previously expressed equanimity about continuing on with his current show. (However, I suspect those expressions of reluctance were made at about the same time he was negotiating a new contract.)
Posted by: Ace at
08:31 AM
| Comments (484)
Post contains 944 words, total size 6 kb.
Posted by: Mark in Sandy Ut at April 10, 2014 08:33 AM (xGX1p)
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 08:33 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: DarrenODaly at April 10, 2014 08:34 AM (bGmyh)
Posted by: JEM at April 10, 2014 08:34 AM (o+SC1)
Posted by: blaster at April 10, 2014 08:34 AM (4+AaH)
His schtick became boring about the time I hit puberty.
Posted by: pep at April 10, 2014 08:34 AM (4nR9/)
Seriously, what did you expect? This is CBS we're talking about...
You don't watch Letterman, you won't watch Colbert. Let it go.
Posted by: RobM1981 at April 10, 2014 08:34 AM (dFemX)
Posted by: wth at April 10, 2014 08:35 AM (wAQA5)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:36 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 10, 2014 08:36 AM (3x3F6)
Colbert isn't as reliable a leftist as Letterman by any means, but, yeah, he is annoying.
This seems like a really stupid choice, though. His schtick will get old really fast. He does his schtick really well, but he has no range outside of it.
Posted by: dan-O at April 10, 2014 08:36 AM (D0bIN)
The smarmy part of his Colbert Report schtick was never an act.
I'll enjoy hearing about the flaming crash up.
Posted by: H Badger at April 10, 2014 08:36 AM (n/0Nw)
And CBS will continue its slide into inanity.
They peaked in the 1960's when they had Green Acres, Beverly Hillbillies and Petticoat Junction in primetime. But that was "too rural" for the folks in Manhattan. And everyone knows Manhattan is the center of the world.
Posted by: rd at April 10, 2014 08:37 AM (D+lxs)
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 08:37 AM (RD7QR)
maybe they'll reconsider and give the job to Conan, at least he has experience taking Letterman's place
Posted by: mallfly at April 10, 2014 08:38 AM (bJm7W)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 08:38 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: maddogg at April 10, 2014 08:38 AM (xWW96)
Posted by: shredded chi at April 10, 2014 08:39 AM (qXebp)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:39 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 10, 2014 08:39 AM (0HooB)
And, at least the Late Show isn't really about politics. So his potential to be partisan hack should be going down. As someone who never watches late night talk shows anyway, the only downside I see is that they've rewarded a tool for being a tool.
Posted by: red sweater at April 10, 2014 08:39 AM (oATMN)
Posted by: no good deed at April 10, 2014 08:39 AM (ILBCY)
Posted by: Marcus T. Throat Punching the shit out of the Progressive Mob at April 10, 2014 08:39 AM (GGCsk)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (da5Wo)
People who might otherwise be expected to know these things were speculating last week, and nobody I heard said they believed Colbert would want it.
It's a different audience. As much as Dave used to be "cool" back in the day, he's been a tired old foop for years now. Does Colbert really want that?
I always figure people like him have cool cred they never earned, and it's the fact that they got placed in the right spot, at the right time that allowed them to acquire it. Remove them from that spot, and they lose it.
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (TOk1P)
Colbert comes off as a pompous douchebag, and that worked on Comedy Central, but I doubt it will work on a network show.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: Sphynx at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (OZmbA)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 08:40 AM (/FnUH)
Mr. Colbert will retire the character he plays on his Comedy Central show--a send-up of Republican talk-show hosts--and will be himself as the host of the CBS show, the company said.
Sadly, my mom will never be able to distinguish the difference. Colbert and Stewart are her TV news sources. le sigh
Posted by: Count de Monet at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (BAS5M)
steven colbert is pathetic.
So, that pretty much explains CBS' choice right there.
Posted by: Tex Lovera at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (wtvvX)
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (TM1p8)
Posted by: Lizzy at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (gzJJ2)
Posted by: wooga at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (AEy5L)
Posted by: Tex Lovera at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (wtvvX)
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 08:41 AM (x3YFz)
CBS is also changing the format of the Late Show. It will now be known as: NCIS: Late Show.
Posted by: Colorado Alex at April 10, 2014 12:40 PM (3x3F6)
lol
Posted by: red sweater at April 10, 2014 08:42 AM (oATMN)
They still respond like trained seals to Maher. If they can do that, they can stand anything.
Posted by: pep at April 10, 2014 08:42 AM (4nR9/)
He's already that.
Posted by: HR at April 10, 2014 08:42 AM (ZKzrr)
I was sort of hoping that CBS would hire Leno.
Can you imagine what would have happened after Jay goes to CBS and their rating go up 50%? I would watch just to tweak the bitter old man.
Posted by: rd at April 10, 2014 08:42 AM (D+lxs)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:42 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Smith! the Art Critic at April 10, 2014 08:42 AM (ORWoy)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (IXrOn)
Ours too!!!
Posted by: LIVs Everywhere at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (OZmbA)
I will admit Colbert is funny with his Bill O'Reilly schtick at times, but it's a very narrow character that he has excelled at. Colbert as the funny mainstream comic? Not seeing it.
It is absurd though that CBS feels completely comfortable with an out and out left wing comic as their showcase for Late Night. The MSM doesn't even pretend anymore to not be in the tank for Left.
Posted by: McAdams at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (x13zk)
But after that? Who knows....?
Posted by: Tex Lovera at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (wtvvX)
No true Scotsman!
Posted by: EC at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (GQ8sn)
I can tell you, some suit somewhere has said, "and we'll add all these CC viewers to the Late Show--boom! #1 baybee!"
Posted by: RoyalOil at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (VjL9S)
Posted by: pat at April 10, 2014 08:43 AM (KCg4m)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 12:42 PM (ZPrif)
Most of us do that in the morning, but i guess late at night will work too.
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 10, 2014 08:44 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 08:44 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:44 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 12:41 PM (x3YFz)
?
Posted by: maddogg at April 10, 2014 08:44 AM (xWW96)
Posted by: JEM at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (o+SC1)
Also, even if we consider Ferguson's oddball comedy and Colbert's oddball comedy to be equally niche and have equal appeal (or lack thereof), you have to consider what there is left beyond that.
At least with Ferguson, he has a genuine nice-guy appeal. He seems like someone you would want to have a beer with. Like Leno.
Colbert? He is a clown; a caricature. He may be funny, but nobody ever thinks: "Man, that would be fun to hang out with him".
Posted by: dan-O at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (D0bIN)
Posted by: brak at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (iEoiA)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: NPR at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (jfUIE)
Posted by: Gmac-Pondering the coming implosion, and hoping its 404care at April 10, 2014 08:45 AM (baiNQ)
Posted by: kbdabear at April 10, 2014 08:46 AM (aTXUx)
Posted by: MTF at April 10, 2014 08:46 AM (1Boes)
Posted by: rickb223 at April 10, 2014 08:46 AM (xZxMD)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 10, 2014 08:46 AM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:46 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Steve Allen at April 10, 2014 08:46 AM (4nR9/)
Posted by: chemjeff at April 10, 2014 08:47 AM (dBV5N)
Does Colbert even have any standup experience? I can't see his monologue being anything. Also all his "humor" is basically politics.
Oh and if he is going to be himself does that mean he was actually go by CoberT instead of his fake "Colbear" pronunciation?
Posted by: buzzion at April 10, 2014 08:47 AM (LI48c)
Posted by: Pee Wee Herman at April 10, 2014 08:47 AM (8ZskC)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 08:47 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 08:47 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: Lizzy at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (gzJJ2)
And that is EXACTLY what the entertainment industry wants from it's variety show hosts.
Can't really blame CBS for not putting a fuzzy foreigner in the prime slot. Blame them for Colbert, yes, but not for not picking Ferguson. (and that's without considering how Piers soiled the well) Given how quickly this came about, Colbert's agent must have played an excellent hand.
They should have found out where Craig Kilborn is hiding. The Daily Show was watchable with him as host... arrogant and self deprecating at the same time.
Posted by: Vince McMahon at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (kFxpe)
Posted by: Tex Lovera at April 10, 2014 12:41 PM (wtvvX)
For a man in a position of great power, Holder really is a whiny little bitch.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (DrWcr)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: elaine at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (GNZ0/)
Posted by: JEM at April 10, 2014 08:48 AM (o+SC1)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 08:49 AM (/FnUH)
Posted by: Marcus T. Throat Punching the shit out of the Progressive Mob at April 10, 2014 08:49 AM (GGCsk)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 08:49 AM (WCaqs)
Posted by: Lincolntf at April 10, 2014 08:49 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (nWEus)
He. Is. Not. Funny.
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 12:44 PM (7ObY1)
As a guy who learned it the hard way: sarcasm and parody are the lowest depths of humor. It's easy, cheap, spiteful and lazy humor.
That's Colbert. He's exceptional at low hanging fruit. And not very witty, at all.
Contrast? Dennis Miller.
He has intellectual references to history, subtle humor, comes out of the blue. He's awesome.
Colbert is a hack. A famous hack, but hack nonetheless.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: Mainah at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (659DL)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (/FnUH)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 08:50 AM (0LHZx)
49 -
See, that's just it though. I don't think it's about the guy, it's about the audience. Colbert's audience makes him cool, and not a tired old foop.
How many of those people are going to jump to CBS with him? How much of Dave's audience will stick around? My guess is, not anywhere near as much as they are hoping, because Colbert IS NOT the cause of his own success.
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 08:51 AM (TOk1P)
Posted by: chemjeff at April 10, 2014 12:47 PM (dBV5N)
Dude. You should smack him upside the head just on general principles.
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 08:51 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: jwb7605 [/i][/u][/s][/b] at April 10, 2014 08:51 AM (ZALPg)
Every comment here is basically...who is this or he's not funny.
You're not funny. Nobody watches your comments anyway.
Posted by: Count de Monet at April 10, 2014 08:51 AM (BAS5M)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 08:51 AM (WCaqs)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 08:51 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 12:49 PM (/FnUH)
And that's even worse to them.
Posted by: buzzion at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (LI48c)
Dude. You should smack him upside the head just on general principles.
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 12:51 PM (RD7QR)
her, not him
Posted by: chemjeff at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (dBV5N)
There are four lights, dude. Four.
Posted by: HR at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (ZKzrr)
Posted by: RWC at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (fWAjv)
Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (da5Wo)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Steve in Greensboro at April 10, 2014 08:52 AM (bbivj)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 08:53 AM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 08:53 AM (WCaqs)
Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at April 10, 2014 08:53 AM (8ZskC)
Posted by: Smith! the Art Critic at April 10, 2014 08:53 AM (ORWoy)
Well to a large chunk of the public he is funny. CBS didn't just hire him because he shares their political views, he hired him, because they think he can make them money by holding a large audience.
Pretending he's not funny or nobody watches him is just silly. Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo
Is that you, Stephen Colbert???! Precious.
Posted by: Sphynx at April 10, 2014 08:53 AM (OZmbA)
Didn't realize that later on he'd become a fan of his.
Ferguson deserves the slot. He's the best late-night talk show host on television, hands down. Colbert is utterly insufferable.
Posted by: Jeff B., RINO emeritus at April 10, 2014 08:53 AM (ewYO6)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: richard mcenroe at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (XO6WW)
Posted by: Greg Gufeld at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (gzJJ2)
Posted by: Every MSNBC anchor at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (LDwc9)
I'm obviously wearing it ironically. DUHHHHH!
Posted by: ChemJeff's student at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (4nR9/)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (qKrH5)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (/FnUH)
Posted by: Iblis at April 10, 2014 08:54 AM (9221z)
Posted by: t-bird at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (FcR7P)
Posted by: Lincolntf at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (u0wJh)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (/FnUH)
Pretending he's not funny or nobody watches him is just silly.
You mean the same people who put Katie Couric in the anchor chair?
Posted by: ChemJeff's student at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (4nR9/)
Posted by: RWC at April 10, 2014 12:52 PM (fWAjv)
-----
**winces**
<<click>>
phew........
Posted by: fixerupper at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (nELVU)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (/FnUH)
Posted by: dantesed at April 10, 2014 08:55 AM (88xKn)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 08:56 AM (rDidD)
Well to a large chunk of the public he is funny.
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 12:48 PM (0LHZx)
My dog thinks it's funny when I crouch and play puppy.
Intellect of the receiver.
You're arguing that the pie in the face gag is 'funny' because idiots are laughing. Think about it.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 08:56 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 08:56 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 10, 2014 08:56 AM (t3UFN)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:56 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 08:56 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: Minnfidel at April 10, 2014 08:57 AM (igKtt)
Posted by: Joe Biden at April 10, 2014 08:57 AM (8ZskC)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 08:57 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: Dice at April 10, 2014 08:58 AM (kFxpe)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:58 AM (ZPrif)
http://tinyurl.com/lk2prdg
Posted by: RWC at April 10, 2014 12:52 PM (fWAjv)
Must. Have. This.
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 08:58 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 08:58 AM (rDidD)
That right there must have disqualified him in the eyes of CBS.
Posted by: Z as in Jersey at April 10, 2014 08:59 AM (K1YYB)
Oh, well. If the regime declares it funny, it must be so. Har.
Posted by: HR at April 10, 2014 08:59 AM (ZKzrr)
Posted by: RWC at April 10, 2014 08:59 AM (fWAjv)
Gutfeld is a funny writer, who has learned over time to deliver his written humor with reasonable skill in the verbal format. But he's nowhere near the caliber of Craig Ferguson in terms of sheer spontaneous charisma.
Here's the best way I can think of to praise Ferguson's show: it's literally the only late-night show I have ever seen where the interviews are every bit as fun and entertaining as the "comedy bits." And 100% of the reason for that is Craig Ferguson: he not only brings the absolute best out of people who in any other context would be horribly boring, he is one of the smoothest (even with his open quirkiness) conversationalists I've ever seen. A Scotsman with the Irish gift of blarney.
Posted by: Jeff B., RINO emeritus at April 10, 2014 08:59 AM (ewYO6)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 08:59 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:00 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Head in the Sand at April 10, 2014 09:00 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: concrete girl at April 10, 2014 09:00 AM (Hcorn)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:00 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: Smith! the Art Critic at April 10, 2014 09:00 AM (ORWoy)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:00 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:01 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Marcus T. Throat Punching the shit out of the Progressive Mob at April 10, 2014 09:01 AM (GGCsk)
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 09:01 AM (u0wJh)
142 -
Have you read any of Gutfeld's books? Pay any attention to the stuff he did when he was on Huffington Post? As an editor of (I don't remember which) one of those men's magazines?
The man is hilarious. And I rarely watch the Fox shows, but when I have, it appears to me he carries everyone else, allowing them to riff on the vibe he creates.
I don't know, it seems to me it would be almost impossible for you to be any more wrong about this than you are.
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 09:02 AM (TOk1P)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 10, 2014 09:02 AM (qKrH5)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:03 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:03 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 09:04 AM (53Nsb)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:04 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: Daybrother at April 10, 2014 09:04 AM (QfspF)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:04 AM (LSJmV)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:04 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 09:04 AM (/FnUH)
Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 10, 2014 09:05 AM (qyfb5)
I think Gutfeld makes a lot of conservatives squirm, because they're not entirely sure his gay schtick is an act.
I think it's brilliant that he keeps doing it over and over and over again. If you don't like it, that's one thing. If you don't understand why it's great humor though, you simply don't understand humor.
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 09:05 AM (TOk1P)
At 12:35 a.m., NBC’s “Late Night With Seth Meyers” hit three-week highs last week, with its 0.70 rating in adults 18-49 and 1.995 million total viewers up vs. the prior week by 4% and 8% respectively. In 18-49, it outdelivered CBS’ “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” by 79% (0.70 vs. 0.39) and ABC’s “Nightline” by 95% for their common half-hour (0.80 vs. 0.41).
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 01:01 PM (u0wJh)
The idea that humans still waste hours or what could be sleep watching a not funny person interview the narcissist of the week pushing their latest book... evades me.
Why?
What, exactly, do you get from watching late night shows?
/awaits.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:05 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:05 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 09:06 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: ace at April 10, 2014 09:06 AM (/FnUH)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:06 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:06 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 09:06 AM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 10, 2014 09:07 AM (qyfb5)
Colbert's thing has been playing a spoof character. I wonder if he can actually handle the late night talk show host gig? A lot of people have tried and failed so it obviously isn't an easy thing to do.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Days of Rage Sale at the Outrage Outlet! at April 10, 2014 09:07 AM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 10, 2014 09:07 AM (dfYL9)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 09:08 AM (mf5HN)
Posted by: Furious George at April 10, 2014 09:08 AM (yFb77)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 09:08 AM (53Nsb)
Posted by: Steven Colbert's First Monolgue at April 10, 2014 09:08 AM (0cMkb)
Posted by: Oschisms at April 10, 2014 09:08 AM (y9dfJ)
Posted by: not the mama at April 10, 2014 09:08 AM (5dxeo)
Posted by: Adam at April 10, 2014 09:09 AM (Aif/5)
They suck!
Thank you.
ZOMG! THAT'S SO FUNNY! HEY YOU GUYS, CHECK OUT THIS AMAZEBALLS COMEDY!
Posted by: HR at April 10, 2014 09:09 AM (ZKzrr)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:09 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:09 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: Tami [/i][/b][/u][/s] at April 10, 2014 09:10 AM (bCEmE)
Posted by: Smith! the Art Critic at April 10, 2014 09:10 AM (ORWoy)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:08 PM (mf5HN)
Have to go with Tsoulakos. It's got that whole crazy, I don't give a fuck thing going for it.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 10, 2014 09:10 AM (DrWcr)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (qKrH5)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:08 PM (mf5HN)
I'm going with Giorgio. The aliens will back him up if he gets in trouble.
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: Chaos the Other Dark Meat at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (oDCMR)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (53Nsb)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:11 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Marcus T. Throat Punching the shit out of the Progressive Mob at April 10, 2014 09:12 AM (GGCsk)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 09:12 AM (PYAXX)
"If either man had had that Carson-like Relatability Factor, there would have been no controversy at all."
I think Carson was good in not making the show all about Carson. He'd have the guests on and he would draw them out, putting them at ease and getting them to talk. There are people that are good doing that, we know them. But those same people usually do not have the ego that is needed to land such a talk show anyway. It is a rare talent to have a great ego and have it on a leash.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Days of Rage Sale at the Outrage Outlet! at April 10, 2014 09:12 AM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 01:03 PM (ZPrif)
Fallon and Myers are "new" and this will be the best they get IMO.
I remember how Dave Letterman was kicking Jay Leno's ass the first year they competed too. That changed after a year. By the end of the second year, Letterman was solidly in second place. And stayed there for the next 20 years.
Posted by: rd at April 10, 2014 09:12 AM (D+lxs)
Posted by: jwb7605 [/i][/u][/s][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:13 AM (ZALPg)
209 -
I watch the Fox shows very rarely, but I'm pretty sure I've seen him do it there. He peppers it all through his writing.
I ask this with complete sincerity: are you really saying you don't know about it, or are you just messing with me?
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 09:13 AM (TOk1P)
The fanbase is almost entirely women, sure, but it may have a bit more broad appeal than you're thinking.
No. It's just broad appeal.
[ISWYDT]
Posted by: 50 Shades of de Monet at April 10, 2014 09:13 AM (BAS5M)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:08 PM (mf5HN)
Don Shipley. https://twitter.com/buds131
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:13 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:14 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: taylork at April 10, 2014 09:14 AM (9bPUR)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:14 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: jwb7605 at April 10, 2014 01:13 PM (ZALPg)
he's dead? sonfa...
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:14 AM (x3YFz)
I WANT to be pissed by this ... but I just can't summon it.
Truth is, after a day of work dumbassery, an evening with my own tribe, and the requisite six beers to wash it all down with - I'm out WAY before any of that shit comes on.
Just do not have a dog in this fight. All the same tho, fuck Colbert. He's a dick of the highest rank.
Posted by: ScoggDog at April 10, 2014 09:15 AM (AWhKR)
Posted by: Chaos the Other Dark Meat at April 10, 2014 01:11 PM (oDCMR)
He used to play the boss on "The Drew Carey Show" if that helps.
Posted by: Stateless Infidel at April 10, 2014 09:15 AM (AC0lD)
'rons and 'ettes rotate in and out as hosts.
RATINGS!
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 01:09 PM (x3YFz)
With Vic as Ed McMahon.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 09:15 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Tami [/i][/b][/u][/s] at April 10, 2014 09:15 AM (bCEmE)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:15 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: Mainah at April 10, 2014 12:50 PM (659DL)
Not putting up pictures of George W. Bush with crosshairs superimposed over it and the graphic "Snipers Wanted." Anymore.
Posted by: NC Ref at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (Myqtp)
Posted by: Inspector Cussword at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (Qp0nB)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 01:09 PM (0LHZx)
Different venue, different audience. Do the audiences overlap at all?
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Days of Rage Sale at the Outrage Outlet! at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Lena Dunham at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (Aif/5)
Posted by: concrete girl at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (Hcorn)
Posted by: weft cut-loop [/i] [/b] at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (m58Tu)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:16 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:17 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 10, 2014 09:17 AM (da5Wo)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 09:17 AM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 01:11 PM (ZPrif)
Well, if no one laughs, it's not funny. By definition.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:17 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: Furious George at April 10, 2014 09:17 AM (yFb77)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: concrete girl at April 10, 2014 01:16 PM (Hcorn)
I long to see ace do standup with a paper bag over his head a la the Unknown Comic.
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: free tibet, etc. at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (6wqZn)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (ZPrif)
235 -
Ok, just wanted to be sure. Yes, he is married, and he's not gay. But he tosses comments out there all the time. Like I said, I've read him much more than I've watched his shows, but it's there.
He'll say something like "I wanted to know what real Americans had to say about the Obamacare exchanges, so I asked my illegal Guatamalan houseboy while he was giving me my daily massage."
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (TOk1P)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:18 AM (0LHZx)
Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at April 10, 2014 09:19 AM (NersQ)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 09:19 AM (PYAXX)
Posted by: Titanium at April 10, 2014 09:19 AM (JLKJJ)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:19 AM (LSJmV)
Posted by: BCochran1981 - Credible Hulk at April 10, 2014 09:19 AM (da5Wo)
Letterman's show should have lasted 15 minutes so he could just throw things out a window and make fun of Larry "Looks like an owl!" King.
Posted by: Shoot Me at April 10, 2014 09:19 AM (EQcfE)
That custodian isn't going to train millions of stupid people to view us as subhuman. Someone should probably take an interest.
Which isn't the same as watching it, or pretending it's funny.
Posted by: HR at April 10, 2014 09:20 AM (ZKzrr)
Posted by: NC Ref at April 10, 2014 01:16 PM (Myqtp)
Which, in and of itself, is hilarious.
As if hippies can shoot.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:20 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 09:20 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Naes1984 at April 10, 2014 09:20 AM (LiHKo)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:21 AM (rDidD)
Breaking News @BreakingNews
General manager says 49ers in 'process of gathering the pertinent facts' regarding sexual assault allegation involving QB Kaepernick - @TMZ
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 01:18 PM (ZPrif)
Pfft. A couple million dollars and a suspended sentence and you're back in the saddle.
Posted by: Big Ben at April 10, 2014 09:21 AM (RD7QR)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 10, 2014 09:21 AM (qKrH5)
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 01:17 PM (x3YFz)
Incorrect.
The only definition I accept is:
"If I don't laugh, it isn't funny."
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 10, 2014 09:21 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: A Liberal AoS Reader, Really! at April 10, 2014 09:21 AM (NgsCI)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 09:21 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 09:22 AM (0LHZx)
Sorry, weft, I've been there and done it so well that anyone else would be a fool to try.
Posted by: Martin Mull, Host of Fernwood Tonight at April 10, 2014 09:22 AM (K1YYB)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 09:22 AM (PYAXX)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 09:22 AM (mf5HN)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:22 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 09:22 AM (zOTsN)
Posted by: tasker at April 10, 2014 09:23 AM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Soothsayer the Unstompable at April 10, 2014 09:23 AM (O96tM)
Posted by: Titanium at April 10, 2014 09:23 AM (JLKJJ)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 01:19 PM (LSJmV)
Getting old, too, I see. If you say your mom ushered you out of the room when the Benny Hill Show came on then we're on the same page.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:23 AM (x3YFz)
I long to see ace do standup with a paper bag over his head a la the Unknown Comic.
Posted by: joncelli at April 10, 2014 01:18 PM (RD7QR)
Ladies and gentlemen, give a warm welcome to the Unknown Chingabasura!
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 09:23 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: tsrblke, PhD(c) (No Really!) at April 10, 2014 09:23 AM (HDwDg)
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 09:24 AM (u0wJh)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 09:24 AM (7ObY1)
Posted by: Furious George at April 10, 2014 09:24 AM (yFb77)
275 -
Heh. Exactly. I don't know how anyone could miss it. It's kind of his bread and butter.
And again, for those who are missing the point. No, Greg Gutfeld is NOT gay! That's part of the gag (pun intended).
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 09:24 AM (TOk1P)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:24 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 01:24 PM (u0wJh)
My webcam feed.
Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at April 10, 2014 09:24 AM (DrWcr)
Posted by: Trey Gowdy at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (1Boes)
Posted by: Lincolntf at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (ZshNr)
Colbert will work out as well as Dennis Miller on MNF.
Posted by: Titanium
Needs more Jinky the Fruit Bat.....
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (kdS6q)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (zOTsN)
Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (qyfb5)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (ZPrif)
"If I don't laugh, it isn't funny."
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 10, 2014 01:21 PM (QFxY5)
uh... isn't that exactly what I said?
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 01:18 PM (0LHZx)
Success in one type of show with one particular demographic appeal does not automatically ensure success with a different show with another demographic appeal. Are the people who watch the Colbert Report to watch Steven "Bill O'Reilly" Colbert the same people who will watch Steven Colbert interview some actress about her last movie, her changing personal life, and then segue to meeting with the director of a Animal Rescue group talking about the Great Horned Owl that is on its way to healing?
I wish I could be as certain about things like that, but my experience is there are few people who can do that role - more of a facilitator or moderator than an actor.
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Days of Rage Sale at the Outrage Outlet! at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Adam at April 10, 2014 09:25 AM (Aif/5)
Ferguson would have been awesome, I have always liked him. Hoping he gets an earlier slot somewhere else.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 10, 2014 09:26 AM (hUf/y)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 09:26 AM (PYAXX)
Posted by: Stringer Davis at April 10, 2014 09:26 AM (xq1UY)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:27 AM (LSJmV)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 09:27 AM (mf5HN)
The man's adorable, no bones about it.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:27 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Stateless Infidel at April 10, 2014 09:27 AM (AC0lD)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:27 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: OG Celtic-American at April 10, 2014 09:27 AM (vHRtU)
First, he had to be funny, obviously.
Well, no. First, he had to be hired, and to be hired, he had to be a left-wing douchebag. That's been standard at the networks for a couple of decades now.
Posted by: Null at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (P7hip)
Posted by: Soothsayer the Unstompable at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (O96tM)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (zOTsN)
297 -
Now that you mention it, I may have never seen a single episode of The Five, so it's possible he was told to keep it under wraps.
Which would be interesting. Now I'm curious to see what he's like WITHOUT the gay stuff.
Posted by: BurtTC at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (TOk1P)
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 01:25 PM (x3YFz)
Not exactly:
"Well, if no one laughs, it's not funny. By definition."
I don't care whether no one else on the planet laughs....
Hell; my wife tells me I am not funny at all, but I think I am!
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (QFxY5)
Posted by: concrete girl at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (Hcorn)
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (dfYL9)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:27 PM (mf5HN)
OOHOOH! I am totally down with head bashing!
What are we head bashing people with Hot Air buttons for anyway? Not that it matters, because *BASH BASH BASH!*
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:28 AM (4df7R)
Colbert will give CBS what Letterman gave them, a name with one funny joke a month, but with constant leftism for the clapping monkeys and shots at conservatives.
Posted by: Guy Mohawk at April 10, 2014 09:29 AM (hUf/y)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:29 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 09:29 AM (u0wJh)
Posted by: Lincolntf at April 10, 2014 09:29 AM (ZshNr)
1) True. More of a situational awareness thing.
2) Kind of disagree. I think a lot of people don't actively choose to become a leftist dolt; they just perceive that it's popular to be one (whether it is or not, but that's all they're exposed to) so they follow along.
Posted by: HR at April 10, 2014 09:30 AM (ZKzrr)
Where else can you see a masturbating bear...I mean, besides the zoo.
Posted by: resist we much at April 10, 2014 01:24 PM (u0wJh)
My webcam feed.
Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at April 10, 2014 01:24 PM (DrWcr)
I have an inside perspective!
Posted by: Timothy Treadwell at April 10, 2014 09:30 AM (BAS5M)
Posted by: Daybrother at April 10, 2014 09:30 AM (8wH5z)
What were you doing on your knees, Steve? Huh? Huh?
Posted by: Arec Bardwin at April 10, 2014 09:30 AM (oJUxt)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:30 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Soothsayer the Unstompable at April 10, 2014 09:30 AM (O96tM)
Posted by: Lincolntf at April 10, 2014 09:31 AM (ZshNr)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:31 AM (rDidD)
I mean, Chris Farley was hysterical as the fat guy character running around and brought big numbers to SNL in the 90's, but you wouldn't have given him a late night show.
Colbert is the wiseass O'Reilly impersenator that gets the liberal college kids who are into politics. I don't see that transition to CBS when he has to drop that character.
Posted by: McAdams at April 10, 2014 09:31 AM (x13zk)
Posted by: tasker at April 10, 2014 09:31 AM (RJMhd)
I hereby volunteer me and MWR to be the Hot Air
Button girls so that when someone does that, we can bash that person
over the head with a giant Hot Air Button.
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:27 PM (mf5HN)
I thought MWR was slotted for the "Girls on Trampolines" bit?
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 09:32 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Soothsayer the Unstompable at April 10, 2014 09:32 AM (O96tM)
Posted by: Nevergiveup at April 10, 2014 09:32 AM (t3UFN)
Posted by: Daybrother at April 10, 2014 09:32 AM (5jJ0l)
Posted by: tasker at April 10, 2014 09:32 AM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Furious George at April 10, 2014 09:33 AM (yFb77)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:33 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Man who cleans toilets at April 10, 2014 09:33 AM (R5UOB)
Posted by: tasker at April 10, 2014 09:33 AM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 01:32 PM (zF6Iw)
I can multitask.
*bounce up on trampoline*
*WHACK! someone over the head with Hot Air button on descent*
*repeat*
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:34 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Soothsayer the Unstompable at April 10, 2014 09:34 AM (O96tM)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 09:34 AM (zOTsN)
Posted by: --- at April 10, 2014 09:34 AM (MMC8r)
Posted by: the littl shyning man at April 10, 2014 09:34 AM (tmFlQ)
*bounce up on trampoline*
*WHACK! someone over the head with Hot Air button on descent*
*repeat*
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit at April 10, 2014 01:34 PM (4df7R)
Ratings gold!
Posted by: Insomniac at April 10, 2014 09:34 AM (DrWcr)
OT: Noticed at ABC that Obama will be speaking at the 50th Anniversary of the passage of the Civil RightÂ’s Act.
Two
questions.
First, will he mentioned the following numbers?:
House of Representatives:
Democrats for: 152 (61%)
Democrats against: 96
Republicans for: 138 (80%)
Republicans against: 34
Senate:
Democrats for: 46 (69%)
Democrats against: 21
Republicans for: 27 (82%)
Republicans against: 6
Second. Will Obama hail the progress blacks have made in fighting discrimination through this law, but lament the fact that now Christians are discriminated against for their beliefs?
Yeah, two stupid questions, I know.
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 09:35 AM (TM1p8)
Posted by: tasker at April 10, 2014 09:35 AM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:35 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: thunderb at April 10, 2014 01:34 PM (zOTsN)
This was several years ago, and it's entirely possible he was only drunk on the excitement, since he's so enamored of America and it's a helluva show; lots of pageantry and flag waving and people dressed up in red white and blue.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:35 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Vote Lord Humungus 2016 at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (HEa5q)
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (4df7R)
He's certainly been on enough late night shows to be qualified.
Posted by: WolfinNC at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (HELQE)
Posted by: Citizen X at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (7ObY1)
Jimmy Carter: Southern White Men Drawn To GOP Because of RacismÂ…
Why that senile old Jew-baiter isn't cowering in a dark corner of hell gargling Satan's balls is a question that the nation ponders.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 01:35 PM (TM1p
An excellent point, but barrel nonetheless.
Posted by: Big Ben at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (RD7QR)
Dude. And a bucket of chicken farts.
Posted by: Arec Bardwin at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (oJUxt)
Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 10, 2014 09:36 AM (qyfb5)
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 09:37 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 10, 2014 09:37 AM (R5UOB)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 09:37 AM (mf5HN)
Where else can you see a masturbating bear...I mean, besides the zoo.
Posted by: resist we much
At the beach in Provicetown MA -- on any given Summer weekend....
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at April 10, 2014 09:37 AM (kdS6q)
Colbert will stop being a pretend Republican douchebag and become the real douchebag that he is?
How will anyone know the difference?
You all know he'll diss and dismiss Republicans/Conservatives and pretend to say stuff Republicans/Conservatives would supposedly say.
So what's the difference?
I don't watch any of them anymore but I might be interested to see Craig Ferguson in that spot because he's, like you know, FUNNY!
Why do we even pay attention to these whores any more?
Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Waiting For SMODOT) at April 10, 2014 09:37 AM (JS0vr)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (ZPrif)
false
false
EN-US
X-NONE
X-NONE
-----
I'll take "Number of Successful Escapes From The Barrel" for $1000.00 Alex
Posted by: fixerupper at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (nELVU)
Posted by: bonhomme[/i][/b][/s][/i][/b][/s] at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (qKrH5)
Where else can you see a masturbating bear...I mean, besides the zoo.
Posted by: resist we much
City park in San Francsisco?
Posted by: Insomniac at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (DrWcr)
i mean really: who watches this crap, other than mouth breathing window lickers?
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (q+fqH)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (rDidD)
Get him liquored up and bring nothing but actors who are still in the closet....then just sit back.
Posted by: Paladin at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (YNPwP)
Posted by: artisanal 'ette at April 10, 2014 09:38 AM (IXrOn)
Posted by: Nip Sip at April 10, 2014 09:39 AM (0FSuD)
I knew I had you at head bashing.
What can I say? I'm transparent in so many ways.
In somewhat related news, I have finally tracked down the best explanation of the 'Ettes yet:
http://bit.ly/OKHmdH
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:37 PM (mf5HN)
PERFECT. And the allusion to a fawn just makes it easier for me to *frolic!*
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:39 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:39 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Reggie 1971 at April 10, 2014 09:39 AM (UQ3Cy)
Posted by: WalrusRex at April 10, 2014 09:39 AM (GW+jL)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:40 AM (LSJmV)
Posted by: Mainah at April 10, 2014 09:40 AM (659DL)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:40 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Sandra Fluke at April 10, 2014 09:40 AM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at April 10, 2014 09:41 AM (dfYL9)
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:41 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:41 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Mikey NTH - Days of Rage Sale at the Outrage Outlet! at April 10, 2014 09:41 AM (hLRSq)
Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at April 10, 2014 09:41 AM (R5UOB)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 09:41 AM (PYAXX)
Posted by: Nip Sip at April 10, 2014 09:42 AM (0FSuD)
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 09:42 AM (mf5HN)
Has anyone seen Colbert as a comedian not playing a character? That's what's so incredibly stupid about this decision. He's never been tested in the role, and he's not getting "training wheels"on a later slot, he's been given the flagship spot in late night.
Posted by: McAdams
If you mean a character other than his CCConservative -- yes.
He's a Second City alum, and beside Strangers With Candy he did that Exit 57 sketch show.
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at April 10, 2014 09:42 AM (kdS6q)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:42 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:42 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (PYAXX)
Posted by: Tami at April 10, 2014 01:10 PM (bCEmE)
The whole "House Boys in Bondage" comments? Watch the show much?
Posted by: Paladin at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (YNPwP)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (LSJmV)
Here's a lass with a sweet Scottish accent:
http://tinyurl.com/mjt9jxq
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (QFxY5)
Our Hot Air Button girl costumes:
http://bit.ly/1iyr7ID
Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD/Orion Death Star 2016 at April 10, 2014 01:42 PM (mf5HN)
Airy. Breathable. Affords a good range of motion. And as an added bonus, nothing to get in the way whilst trampolining.
I approve!
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Nip Sip at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (0FSuD)
Posted by: WalrusRex at April 10, 2014 09:43 AM (GW+jL)
OK. Now be funny.
Posted by: Muad'dib at April 10, 2014 09:44 AM (sjdRT)
barrel. Now. In, and if you say 1 word I follow you with a 9-banger.
/slams lid shut.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:44 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:44 AM (rDidD)
It's probably a good bet.
Posted by: Mr. Moo Moo at April 10, 2014 01:06 PM (0LHZx)
Of course, conservatives would never self-select themselves out of the Nielsen ratings base because they value their privacy more than do liberals, would they?
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 10, 2014 09:44 AM (IxLzY)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:44 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: Navycopjoe at April 10, 2014 09:45 AM (hKIk9)
*wanders off to find footage of Tom Hiddleston talking in a Scottish accent*
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:45 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: OG Celtic-American at April 10, 2014 09:45 AM (vHRtU)
Posted by: Soothsayer the Unstompable at April 10, 2014 09:45 AM (O96tM)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:45 AM (ZPrif)
Posted by: redc1c4 at April 10, 2014 01:38 PM (q+fqH)
^^^ this
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:45 AM (x3YFz)
Posted by: S Colbert. at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (R5UOB)
Posted by: Nip Sip at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Naes1984 at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (LiHKo)
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (TM1p8)
Posted by: Craig Kilborne at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (MMC8r)
He'd bring the love
Posted by: Navycopjoe at April 10, 2014 01:45 PM (hKIk9)
Part of their shtick could be getting raided by ICE on a nightly basis.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (DrWcr)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:46 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: hack at April 10, 2014 09:47 AM (piR98)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:47 AM (LSJmV)
BLM fracking racket exposed!
Armed siege and cattle theft from Bundy ranch really about fracking leases.
http://tinyurl.com/lpe7n2w
Posted by: rickb223 at April 10, 2014 09:47 AM (d0Dmj)
Posted by: tasker at April 10, 2014 09:47 AM (RJMhd)
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 01:46 PM (TM1p
Nope. No killing. Now get your ass back down there.
Posted by: tangonine at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (x3YFz)
Also, why are we not protesting yet another hosting job going to a hetronomative cis-genedered white male?
Wanda Sykes is still available and she has direct experience -- at taking a late night talkshow down in flames.
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (kdS6q)
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 01:46 PM (TM1p
-----
You want a funeral.
You'll settle for a wake.
You're getting composted.
Posted by: fixerupper at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (nELVU)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Arec Bardwin at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (oJUxt)
Posted by: Johnny Carson at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (R5UOB)
Just kidding! I thought the first attempt was funneh.
Posted by: Muad'dib at April 10, 2014 09:48 AM (sjdRT)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 01:45 PM (ZPrif)
There's a reason why Time Life albums always advertise themselves as, "All the top hits by the artists who made them famous." It doesn't matter who started something; what matters is who ran away with it and made it their own.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:49 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars™ [/i] [/s] [/u] at April 10, 2014 09:49 AM (cCpYP)
Posted by: Navycopjoe at April 10, 2014 09:49 AM (hKIk9)
Posted by: Daybrother at April 10, 2014 09:49 AM (BDB07)
Posted by: yankeefifth at April 10, 2014 09:49 AM (rDidD)
Posted by: Bill Maher at April 10, 2014 09:49 AM (/AHDz)
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix
Aren't all of those "characters"? That was my point, not that he's only played one character.
Posted by: McAdams at April 10, 2014 09:50 AM (x13zk)
Posted by: Sharkman at April 10, 2014 09:50 AM (TM1p8)
Posted by: RWC at April 10, 2014 09:50 AM (fWAjv)
Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit [/i][/s][/b][/u] at April 10, 2014 09:50 AM (0HooB)
Posted by: RWC at April 10, 2014 01:50 PM (fWAjv)
I heard there's a rose in Spanish Harlem.
Posted by: Insomniac at April 10, 2014 09:51 AM (DrWcr)
Posted by: Scott M at April 10, 2014 09:51 AM (AdBfq)
Posted by: Nip Sip at April 10, 2014 09:51 AM (0FSuD)
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 09:51 AM (LSJmV)
Posted by: Costanza Defense at April 10, 2014 09:51 AM (ZPrif)
Yeah, I don't get this. I mean... the whole POINT of The Cotton Club is, y'know, Harlem. If you make a production about The Cotton Club but cast an all-white cast, then sorry, you ain't making a production about The Cotton Club.
Woody has officially gone off his rocker. Years of lusting after little girls will do that to a twisted fruit like him.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:52 AM (4df7R)
Posted by: Smith! the Art Critic at April 10, 2014 09:52 AM (ORWoy)
Aren't all of those "characters"? That was my point, not that he's only played one character.
Posted by: McAdams
Almost all comedians play "characters", unless you think Rodney Dangerfield or Gilbert Gottfried are like they are on stage when they're at home.
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at April 10, 2014 09:53 AM (kdS6q)
Posted by: rockhead at April 10, 2014 09:53 AM (jtTKf)
Posted by: D. Fagen at April 10, 2014 09:54 AM (LSJmV)
>So how YE doin, lassie?
Posted by: Countrysquire at April 10, 2014 01:43 PM (LSJmV<
OK. Now be funny.
Posted by: Muad'dib at April 10, 2014 01:44 PM (sjdRT)
Just lift his kilt.
Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at April 10, 2014 09:54 AM (zF6Iw)
Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith[/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at April 10, 2014 09:54 AM (qyfb5)
Posted by: Walter Freeman at April 10, 2014 09:54 AM (kqGWM)
Posted by: Nip Sip at April 10, 2014 09:54 AM (0FSuD)
They couldn't find an American to do it?
Posted by: Navycopjoe at April 10, 2014 01:49 PM (hKIk9)
Honestly, Ferguson was and is a Scot, but he's one of the proudest Americans you'll ever see. He GETS it.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Bossy Assault Hobbit [/s][/u][/i][/b] at April 10, 2014 09:55 AM (4df7R)
OT, but in the sidebar I see that ever cautious George Will has thrown in the towel on the GOP and is calling for an Article 5 convention.
Thats pretty remarkable.
Posted by: MTF at April 10, 2014 09:55 AM (LISuA)
Posted by: Hrothgar at April 10, 2014 09:58 AM (o3MSL)
Posted by: Hrothgar at April 10, 2014 09:59 AM (o3MSL)
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix
I don't think Letterman, Leno, Carson, Conan, etc are playing "characters".
Colbert in a sketch comedy show like Second City or Strangers With Candy is playing specific characters that are usually over the top. Just like he was with the O'Reilly character.
Much different, and it's a big gamble for CBS to not see how he can do with hosting a flagship Late Night show when he's never done that kind of comedy.
Posted by: McAdams at April 10, 2014 10:00 AM (x13zk)
Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith[/i] [/b] [/s] [/u] at April 10, 2014 10:02 AM (qyfb5)
Armed siege and cattle theft from Bundy ranch really about fracking leases.
http://tinyurl.com/lpe7n2w
Posted by: rickb223 at April 10, 2014 01:47 PM (d0Dmj)
So you are opposed to America being self-sufficient in energy, too? Inasmuch as he is leasing surface (i.e. grazing) rights, and Noble is interested in subsurface rights, there is no conflict.
I have been on many drilling leases on ranch land. The cows don't mind, and usually the rancher gets a nice check for the lease and road access rights. If there is a conflict between farming/ranching and the oil industry, you can bet it is being ginned-up by leftists or foreign interests. I know many farmers and ranchers who work the rigs in their off-season.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at April 10, 2014 10:07 AM (IxLzY)
They just might seem serious because they're playing a serious character.
Those folks on the News at night? They're playing Newscaster/Anchor and hoping for an opportunity at something bigger.
When you start to look at the Media as an InfoTainment Industry, a lot of how they act and what they say and do becomes clearer.
They're all playing roles. Ad libbing for sure but they're PLAYING ROLES.
This goes back years and years.
Everything you see on TV or the Movies is pretty much fake. It very rarely shows any facts or reality and if so it's only coincidental and was not the object of the Role Players or the Directors/Producers.
The object has always been to
a) make money
b) move an agenda
c) sell that power and access (see a)
Posted by: Bitter Clinger and All That (Waiting For SMODOT) at April 10, 2014 10:10 AM (JS0vr)
Posted by: joeindc44 at April 10, 2014 10:11 AM (+JbYP)
Posted by: Fringe at April 10, 2014 10:13 AM (oWl4T)
Posted by: Max Power at April 10, 2014 10:43 AM (q177U)
Since Steven Colbert has been giving the stiff middle finger to conservatives and Republicans for the past decade or so, I'm not getting a real big "likability" vibe from him, and will not be watching their show.
This case could be one where living in the leftist bubble will really hurt a network. They just don't see how toxic Colbert is with most of the country, because they find his anti-Republican schtick amusing. Since they don't know any actual Republicans over at CBS, they can't see how anybody would find Colbert to be anything other than charming.
Posted by: Haiku Guy at April 10, 2014 10:48 AM (bIy5N)
Posted by: OneEyedJack at April 10, 2014 10:51 AM (agLwc)
Posted by: McEwan at April 10, 2014 10:55 AM (oGRPn)
Posted by: Piers Morgan at April 10, 2014 11:29 AM (dqzWI)
Posted by: rrpjr at April 10, 2014 11:33 AM (s/yC1)
Posted by: davis at April 10, 2014 12:23 PM (Kxz3Y)
I don't know how his ratings are, but several of Fallons little skits have showed up in my inbox, so I think he's doing something right.
I can't get NBC, so even if I wanted to watch live I would have to pass. I wish someone would do a netflix show. One of the few things I miss not having cable is The Soup.
Posted by: Lea at April 10, 2014 01:17 PM (lIU4e)
Posted by: rex the wonder god at April 10, 2014 11:08 PM (aLo9s)
Posted by: Ghost of Ellsworth Toohey at April 11, 2014 11:37 AM (E3sHO)
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Posted by: AllenG (DedicatedTenther) Ah, F It. at April 10, 2014 08:32 AM (PYAXX)