The husky huckster walks away "dejectedly" as his sweaty self-promotion efforts fail to impress moviegoers.

Scrappleface reports it's all part of Bush's plan.

Apologies: Instapundit had both parts of this post first. I'm posting anyway, because I had this idea first in a Billy "Blaze" Blazjowski way: I also had them first, except that Instapundit had already thought of it.

Posted by: Ace at 06:36 AM | Comments (14)
Post contains 68 words, total size 1 kb.

Which is a number you can easily win with. In fact, Reagan and Clinton both won re-election with that number.

Gallup seems to emulate the New York Times by burying the lede. The article is about Bush's erosion of Hispanic support. That's interesting and important, but one would think that the article could have gotten around to mentioning, at some point, that Bush's job approval is now over the crucial 50% level by a margin that's simultaneously both small and large.

And that's his job approval among registered voters-- a sample that has historically skewed Democratic.

Hat tip to Free Republic.

Posted by: Ace at 03:08 PM | Comments (14)
Post contains 117 words, total size 1 kb.

I've mentioned this before, but I'm not sure I've done so on this blog.

This just fascinates me. You want to know the definition of a tolalitarian and insane society? It's a society whose media reports straight-facedly that their Beloved Leader shot thirty-fucking-eight under par in his first time playing the game:

Pyongyang media say North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il enjoys golf, having shot multiple holes-in-one during his first try at the game. He reportedly aced five holes and finished 38 under par on the golf course. The "Great Leader" routinely shoots three or four holes-in-one per round, the government-controlled media reported.

He routinely shoots three or four holes-in-one per round, and they say he "enjoys" the game?

Well who the heck wouldn't, shooting like that?

Smell's like tonight's Top Ten.

Thanks to Nick for sending me a fresh link to my continuing obsession.

Posted by: Ace at 12:27 PM | Comments (10)
Post contains 160 words, total size 1 kb.

*tuk *tuk *tuk *tuk:

WASHINGTON - The economy appears headed for a banner year despite a springtime spike in energy prices and a recent increase in interest rates.

In fact, many analysts are forecasting that the overall economy, as measured by the gross domestic product, will grow by 4.6 percent or better this year, the fastest in two decades.

My analysis: *tuk *tuk *tuk *tuk

...

But if this year's growth ends up a bit faster than [expected], it will be the best since the economy roared ahead at a 7.2 percent rate in 1984, a year when another Republican president — Ronald Reagan (news - web sites) — was running for re-election.

"We are moving into a sweet spot for the economy with interest rates not too high, jobs coming back and business investment providing strength," said Diane Swonk, chief economist at Bank One in Chicago, who is predicting GDP (news - web sites) growth of 4.8 percent this year.

The senior economic forecaster at Morgan Stanley was quoted as saying, "*tuk *tuk *tuk *tuk."

...

Even with the 10 months of consecutive job gains, Bush is still facing a 1.2 million jobs deficit, from the last peak for employment in March 2001.

However, many analysts anticipate the economy will generate around 200,000 jobs per month over the next six months, a pace that would be enough to erase his deficit figure by the end of the year. That would enable him to escape being the only president since Herbert Hoover in the Great Depression to have lost jobs while in office.

Although the economy created only 112,000 jobs in June, after averaging 304,000 jobs for the previous three months, analysts expect strong job growth the rest of this year.

They predict the unemployment rate — stuck at 5.6 percent for most of this year — will improve gradually, to 5.3 percent by December, as a strengthening job market draws people back into the labor force.

Summing up:

*tuk *tuk *tuk *tuk

In related news: As predicted, after spending the first half of the year almost entirely avoiding the issue of the American economy, Paul Krugman roars at the subject yet again, feeling safer about doing so thanks to June's not-as-good-as-expected job creation.

Let's see: Two columns per week, about three weeks left in July; I figure he'll be able to write 3-5 columns about how dreadful the economy was, is, and always shall be under Bush, before being promptly forced to abandon the issue again around August 3rd or 4th.

Have fun, Paul.

*tuk *tuk *tuk *tuk Update: Consumer confidence (as polled by ABC/CNNMoney) reaches five month high:

The index now stands at its best level since early February and near its average of -9 since the survey started in December 1985.

Okay, just getting almost up to the average 20-year reading isn't terrific, but it's better than being far off the average.

Posted by: Ace at 12:13 PM | Comments (1)
Post contains 493 words, total size 3 kb.

Sounds like a plan.

Expect leftist hyperventilation over this. Leftists have this weird idea from which they simply cannot be disabused: that all violence is wrong, and that even perpetrating violence against killers and butchers and mass-murderers somehow shows the "hypocrisy" of America and its allies.

If there's a running gun-battle between bank-robbers, cops, and civilians who have come on to the scene to assist the police, leftists claim that all three groups are equally blameworthy.

The Memeorandum site linked to is a pretty interesting one. The site just takes the biggest headlines of the day -- and an awful lot of them -- gives you a quick digest, and then links to blogs talking about that topic.

I expect he'll get much bigger before long.

Posted by: Ace at 11:22 AM | Comments (7)
Post contains 144 words, total size 1 kb.

Promises to Make "Quality Hair-Care" Affordable for All Americans

I N D I A N A P O L I S, Indiana -- Newly-announced vice presidential candidate John Edwards returned to his presidential-campaign "Two Americas" speech today, condemning the Bush Administration for its lack of concern that 43 million Americans do not receive quality hair-care.

"We are living in Two Americas," the decadantly-coifed millionaire told a jubilant crowd of Democratic Party stalwarts. "In one America, the rich, priviledged, and white use top-shelf shampoos and conditioners to ensure a rich, luxurious sheen to their hair. In the other America -- the America of the middle-class, of minorities -- our fellow citizens are forced to choose from inferior brands such as Suave, and sometimes even the CVS store brand."

"This injustice must not stand," he thundered, running one hand through his coquettishly-dangling bangs.

Democratic strategist Susan Estrich hailed the selection of Edwards as bringing a "new energy" to the Kerry campaign, as well as "reminding all Americans of Dostoyevsky's famous admonishment: a society is judged by how well it treats its split-ends and oily or 'fly-away dry' hair-types."

Washington had been abuzz with rumors about Kerry's choice of Edwards after Edwards had recalled most of the senior staff that had served him in his abortive presidential run. Those rumors reached fever-pitch when he was reported to have met with Paul Mitchell and Vidal Sassoon, who were today named his foreign-policy and economics advisor, respectively.

"We will bring a new luster to the American dream," Edwards stated to reporters on the tarmac at a small Indiana airfield. "We will renew its sheen, and we will revitalize its vitality and bounce." He seemed nearly on the verge of tears as he concluded his remarks. "We will no longer have one America shut out from the American dream of gorgeously flowing locks, while the other America-- the America of Enron, Halliburton, and the KKK -- has moaning orgasms as it rubs Herbal Essences into its collective fat-cat scalp."

Dick Cheney could not be reached for comment.

Posted by: Ace at 10:48 AM | Comments (9)
Post contains 359 words, total size 2 kb.

The New York Post has the exclusive.

My previous position on Kerry's running mate: I don't think I could possibly care any less

My new position: Turns out I was wrong

Update: Okay, the Post got it wrong. I'm curious as to how they got it wrong-- did the Kerry camp feed them & then confirm false tips?

My position on Kerry's veep, however, remains unchanged: I just don't care either way.

Actually, I was looking forward to the "gay Daleks" cartoon.

-- So was I! (swoon!)

Posted by: Ace at 11:45 PM | Comments (22)
Post contains 93 words, total size 1 kb.

BBC Fails to Reach Terms With Daleks' Agent

Here's the weird thing: that headline isn't really a joke.

Seriously, the Daleks balked at appearing in the series, citing a disagreement over "editorial influence" over the series and especially the series' depiction of the Daleks.

As you well know, cybernetic life-forms are real bears on the issues of creative control.

And not only is that not a joke, but here's something else that isn't a joke: Part of the dispute stems from the Daleks' unhappiness at the BBC's attempts to produce a show about gay Daleks.

Exterminate, exterminate! Oh, and three Appletinis for myself and my club-mates Christopher and "Slam."

Top Ten Other Rejected Daleks Contractual Demands

10. Citing him as "creating a poisionous atmosphere for the creative process," protocol droid C-3PO barred from ever entering the set

9. Each Dalek must be supplied with his own luxury trailer during shooting, complete with entertainment center, foosball table, and "state-of-the-art facilities for live brain transplantations"

8. The BBC, on behalf of all humankind, agrees "in principle" that organic life is fundamentally inferior to "created life forms"

7. All Daleks must be supplied with an assortment of fresh citrus fruit and one (1) large bowl of M&M's with all of the brown ones taken out

6. The BBC must agree to produce and promote a Daleks album of classic pop-folk covers, to be called Feelin' Groovy: The Daleks Sing the Music of Simon & Garfunkel

5. The BBC agrees to run public-service announcements in support of the Daleks' goal of exterminating and/or enslaving all of humanity

4. The Daleks demand the BBC grant them a three-picture deal; the first film they plan is described as a "laugh-a-minute all-star racing picture" co-starring Dom DeLuise

3. The BBC must use "best business efforts" to assist in the Daleks' plot of replacing all world leaders with android doubles

2. 5% of the profits from the series must be invested in a new Michael Moore "documentary," tentatively titled The Timelords: Sinister Stormtroopers of Galactic Deceit and Evil

...and the Number One Rejected Dalk Contractual Demand...

1. The BBC agrees to run three "variety show" style televison specials starring the Daleks: A Very Daleks Christmas, Hangin' Wit' da Daleks, and You Puny Earthlings Have Precisely Five Seconds to Submit to Your Robotic Overlords (with special guest performance by Sheryl Crowe)

Posted by: Ace at 10:29 PM | Comments (13)
Post contains 408 words, total size 3 kb.

Terrorist attacks reach "record lows" during transfer of power, but have returned to previous levels:

Daily attacks on U.S. troops dropped to between 20 to 25 per day between June 28 and 30, defying intelligence reports that predicted a major rebel offensive timed to coincide with the announced June 30 handover date.

Just the opposite happened. In a surprise move aimed at sidestepping the expected attacks, U.S. occupation chief L. Paul Bremer handed power to an Iraqi government on June 28 - two days early. Instead of a rebel offensive, Iraq won a few days of rare calm.

Army Lt. Col. Daniel Baggio said he believed the insurgents' "decision cycle" had been upended by Bremer's unexpected handoff.

The military is still exploring the reasons for the two-day lull. Since then, attacks have returned to their recent levels of 35 to 45 per day, the military said.

Allawi drawing up possible amnesty plan for insurgets, even for those involved in killing US troops.

This is neither unexpected nor particularly objectionable. As has been said before, when you endeavor to make peace, you compromise with those you had been at war with. You don't make "peace" with friends.

This isn't the first time the interests of justice have conflicted with the interests of peace-- it happens every time we negotiate a safe-exit for a vicious tyrant in exchange for a peaceful transfer of power to those opposing him.

If this results in fewer US troops dying in the future, it's a good deal. Yes, it would be better to kill every one of these sonsabitches. But at what point does our interest in justice become outweighed by our interest in seeing as many as possible of our boys come home alive, and as soon as possible as well?

The New York Times, shockingly, continues with its "Objective, Balanced News Coverage" experiment, this time reporting on the "wary pride" of Iraqis in their new indiginous government.

Our captured Marine has been beheaded.

Horrible, of course. But there is a silver lining: this behavior is not shocking nor terrorizing us anymore. We have become resigned to the fact that when one of our people is captured by these butchers, he's already a dead man walking. These murders, while vicious and painful, are really little different in terms of pain than a soldier killed by a roadside bomb. And yet the nation doesn't fly into panic over a single roadside-bomb murder, and they shouldn't cover these murders, either.

I hope no one reads that as indifference about these murders. I'm just stating that the terrorists are experiencing declining returns on their newest barbarities.

Mookie al-Sadr is again urging violence against the "occupiers" of Iraq. Three strikes and you're out, pal.

Posted by: Ace at 02:30 PM | Comments (4)
Post contains 461 words, total size 3 kb.

As Son of Nixon notes, right now would be a good time to start short-selling Anna Kournikova merchandise.

Within a year, Kournikova be doing soft-core porn on Cinemax. She'll play a sexy "erotic detective" who solves crimes by having sex and playing tennis... poorly.

Posted by: Ace at 10:08 AM | Comments (6)
Post contains 56 words, total size 1 kb.