Beyonce's new record is awful and obnoxious.

Of course a lot of her previous work was awful and obnoxious, but apparently some dolts took her bubblegum pop song "Single Ladies" as some kind of Empowering Manifesto, rather than the silly O Network bumper theme it was, and now they're all butthurt she's saying "bow down bitches" or whatever.

But this will still come as a shock to long-term Beyoncé fans. It seems that overnight we’ve been transformed from Beyoncé’s beloved single ladies, independent women and survivors, into her bitches. From Beyoncé singing, “all the women, independent, throw your hands up at me” to “bow down bitches” a change is underway, and it leaves a bitter taste in the mouth.

Rush Limbaugh noticed how very stupid this all is and made a prediction.

RUSH: So I'm telling you, folks, we're dealing in a genuine low-information universe. It's perhaps worse than we even know. I was talking to a friend about this event this morning, and I came to a conclusion. I've mentioned on this program a number of times that we've exhausted all of our persuasive attempts, other than a concerted TV ad campaign.

We've exhausted every bit of persuasive talent that we have. We own talk radio, and Fox News for the most part. We've done everything we can, and yet no impact. So we've all been waiting for an event. And when I've said this, people have assumed I meant a hurricane or a tornado, some sort of natural disaster, a God event. No, no, no. I don't mean that. I'm talking about "event" in politics. Let me tell you what I think it's gonna be. It'll be something that will wake people up about Obama.

It isn't gonna be anything serious. It isn't gonna be anything substantive. Something like this is gonna happen: Obama is gonna be talking to somebody on open mike, and he's gonna diss Justin Timberlake's latest CD, and the country is gonna get outraged, and they'll turn on Obama. See, it's gonna be something like that, or he'll diss Beyonce.

Well apparently it's already the Hot New Thing to diss Justin Timberlake's latest CD (he's like soooo over now, Serious You Guys), but I take his point.

The world is collectively embracing Dumb. Stupid, shallow, and puerile. Dumb is easy and easy is Holy.

It will work out exactly the way you think it will.

More Empowerment: I always thought this was a good bubblegum pop song, but empowering? Beyonce just seems to do "gangster"-style baiting and self-promotion from a girly-girl point of view.

I can't see how any adult could take any of this seriously.

Posted by: Ace at 09:01 AM | Comments (204)
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Ah right.

Actually he said that "weather extremes" are due to global warming, but this now includes winter storms.

Nothing like a theory that predicts nothing in advance but "predicts" everything in retrospect.

Global warming now causes global cooling. Sometimes it might even cause "unnaturally mild weather."

Dr. Leo Spaceman had a line on 30 Rock I like: "Science is whatever we want it to be."

And because someone demanded it: Here's a NYT reporter going on and on about Lena Dunham and positive body image.

You might think from all the mentions of Girls in the media it's some kind of huge cultural phenomenon. It's not. It doesn't even get good ratings for HBO -- it doesn't even get 20% of the ratings of Game of Thrones, and you don't see Game of Thrones name-checked every third mainstream media culture piece.

But it does get good ratings with the only cohort that apparently matters, the Liberal Middle-Aged Women Working In the Media Who Control Your TV.

I don't even object to the show. I don't watch it, but I don't watch most things. I can (begrudgingly) concede that I can see how the show would appeal to some people, and how it must be pretty cool, for feminists, that a girl writes and stars in the show (with some help from Judd Apatow, but no one wants to talk about that). The basic idea -- an unsentimental counterpoint to Sex & the City with the layers of vapid I Married Blew a Millionaire fantasy stripped away -- sounds okay to me. And I suppose there are bonus points, from Liz Lemonist feminists, about the show's focus on Rich White Women Problems, such as negative body image.

And yet... and yet. The show is discussed and promoted far out-of-line with its actual cultural impact or penetration. This all seems terribly self-indulgent to me.

more...

Posted by: Ace at 08:05 AM | Comments (279)
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Without doubt. Graham is right to push this.

Watch Jay Carney's lie right here. In the first part of the sentence, he claims the White House is not blocking these people from talking. In the second part, he adds in that they are, of course, precluded from discussing sensitive topics due to their positions...

The second part of the sentence blows up the first part. This is the game the White House is playing: They are putting these people on notice they might be prosecuted for revealing state secrets if they say something Obama doesn't like.

We don't have to hear about whatever they were doing in Benghazi as far as secret business -- perhaps they were part of the operation to covertly arm the Syrian rebels. Fine, we don't need to hear about that.

But surely they can talk about the things our enemies already know, like how our enemies mounted a coordinated attack against our embassy.

The press just rolls over for Obama on this. They want people kept in the dark. The only people being prevented from knowing "state secrets" are the American public. Al Qaeda knows all about the details of its operation, after all.

Graham urges subpoenas:

I think that Speaker Boehner is very much in the mindset of trying to get to the bottom of Benghazi. But yes, I will urge Speaker Boehner to use the powers of the House not to chase rabbits, but to get to the bottom line. We have not heard from the people who went through this debacle who were there on the ground. I guarantee if this had been a good news story we would have heard from them the next day. The fact we havenÂ’t heard from them for six months should make every American worried about what this administration is covering up.

I would say they should also offer immunity from prosecution via legislation, but the Senate Democrats would block that and thus renew the very threat that keeps these people quiet. But the House is working on protections for them nonetheless.

Any Benghazi survivor who talks to his committee would be protected from prosecution or job termination from the Obama administration, Rogers said. “We’ll make sure of that. That is whistle bower standard protection. If they’re fired for talking to us, there’ll be some hell to pay.”

Issa agrees, saying, “Any kind of retaliation against any of the witnesses we’ve already had would not be tolerated.

Posted by: Ace at 07:03 AM | Comments (171)
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The headline is:

Nine Percent of Yale Students Surveyed Say TheyÂ’ve Accepted Money for Sex

The fine print is:

The survey was administered to a group of about forty students on Saturday, during a workshop meant to prompt students to “reconsider their idea of ‘normal’,” according to the Yale Daily News.

The workshop was taught by Jill McDevitt, a 27-year-old “sexologist” who also owns a sex shop in West Chester, Pennsylvaina, which sells vibrators and various sex toys.

Here's my alternate headline:

Young Woman With Daddy Issues Seeks Validation Among Strangers at a Sex Workshop; Finds It

Though I should say that sex-for-money, while most recoil from the idea, happens a lot. Well, sex for dinners and gifts. Once I got sex for a cheesesteak. It was a dating thing but sometimes the guy wants sex and the girl doesn't. Thus, payment is offered. And that payment is a cheesesteak.

Posted by: Ace at 06:36 AM | Comments (217)
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You may have heard but this here little blog recently won an award.

And now that Mr. Spades (if thatÂ’s his/her real name, is once again an award winner itÂ’s time to offer up a human sacrifice or hit the tip jar. Since human sacrifices are officially frowned upon by the authorities (stupid liberals), the tip jar, the tiny PayPal link over to the left, seems the better option.

Why should you hit the tip jar? Well, an award winning Ewok blogger canÂ’t eat the lamentations of his vanquished competitors women alone. Though to be honest, IÂ’m sure they make lovely background music at dinner parties.

And while churning out content for the hungry masses should be all the remuneration one needs, it turns out that bloggers might actually have other career options. What if Ace just decided one day that heÂ’d rather be a Senator (R-Forrest Moon of Endor)? Where would that leave you. DonÂ’t laugh. If buffoons like Jar-Jar Binks and Lindsey Graham can become Senators, surely an award winning blogger could do it too.

Ok, so maybe you’re not buying the idea that Ace could leave all this to run for the Senate. But would you believe that all his assets are currently tied up in lucrative Russian investments based in Cyprus? If he doesn’t come up with some money and fast, “Boris” won’t be happy. You can’t type when your fingers are broken or use voice recognition software when your jaw is wired shut.

The reality is, weÂ’re conservatives here (well most of us but thatÂ’s a fight for another post). We donÂ’t believe in getting something for nothing. IÂ’m not saying you should send Ace $5,000 (IÂ’m not saying you shouldnÂ’t either) but if everyone or even most of you, lurkers and comment regulars alike, tossed in $5 or $10 each, it would add up toÂ…carry the 7Â…look thereÂ’s no math on this blog so donÂ’t worry about the exact number, just know it would help the guy out and be greatly appreciated. Not so appreciated that youÂ’ll get a thank you email but donÂ’t be greedy. ItÂ’s better to give than receive, yada, yada, yadaÂ….tip jar.

As always, all money goes to Ace and not for Dave's dental plan (much to Dave's annoyance).

Posted by: DrewM at 06:18 AM | Comments (80)
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• Cuomo Seeking To Undo Parts Of The Gun Bill He Rammed Through
  
• Obama: Israel-Palestine Conflict Just Like The US And Canada..Or Something
  
• Pensiongate: California Crooks Indicted
  
• CVS Order Workers To Reveal Weight And Health Info Or Lose Coverage
  
• Cyprus Banks Shut Until Next Week
  
• Huckabee: Evangelicals Will Walk If The GOP Endorses Gay Marriage
  
• Dems Look To Ban Redskins From Being Trademarked
  
• Men In Decline Means More Single Moms
  
• The Creative Class's Failure At Remaking Our Cities
  
• Student Dies Huffing Computer Cleaner
  
• Network News Avoids Covering The Gosnell Trial
  
• More Leaked Hillary E-mails
  
• The Battle Between Jay Leno and NBC Continues
  
• EU To Cyprus, We Are Not Impressed
  
• Conn Man Gives Good Showing At Gun Control Hearing
  
• Reason To Homeschool Your Kids Part 253
  
• The Anti-Zionist DNA Of The New York Times
  
• Man Saves Toddler's Life At A Grocery Store After The Toddler Stops Breathing
  
• Detroit Pension Attorney, Ex-Trustee Indicted For Bribery
  
• Suing The Gun Grabbers
  

Follow me on twitter.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 05:22 AM | Comments (204)
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Happy Thursday.

It's a good thing we've had wet weather here in Virginia, this is the sort of thing that can get out of control very fast.

The Senate passed the CR, but it stripped out the provisions to give agencies more discretion about how to find the money for the sequester cuts.

Christian Heinze's round-up on Sen. Paul's immigration plan is a must-read.

Posted by: Gabriel Malor at 02:58 AM | Comments (406)
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For your low budget seqestering pleasure, the Kinks to start the day.

I once saw Stiv Bators live hang himself with the mic cord on the stage lighting framework. That was around 77' when this clip was filmed. He's been dead for over 20 years now. One of the lucky ones who cashed out while we were still riding high as a nation.

Don't forget to embrace the suck cheerfully. The weekend is only two days away!

Posted by: Open Blogger at 12:45 AM | Comments (72)
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We mean it.

All serial aside, we haven't rattled the tin can in a while for the head Ewok, much to our shame. Where else can you get award winning double posted content like you get here?

No where, that's where. This is how I ask and answer my own questions, because we believe in efficiency, full value on your money, and the guys get shirts.

So please give. Before you do your taxes, that'd be the best time to do it I think.

Award winning commenters make for award winning blogs. Without you, we're just a bunch of yammering yentas arguing over the lunch tab. Speaking of, which one of you assholes had the tuna salad?

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 04:11 PM | Comments (199)
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Retro Ace: The New AoSHQ Rules

It was just over 6 years ago that Ace drew a line in the sand and laid down the Eight Rules of AoSHQ upon his tablets:

1. You jerkoffs will no longer call me a homo.

2. JackM. may no longer write poetry of any sort in honor of Mary Katherine Ham, or whatever other slice of tasty blogcake he's hungry for this week.

3. Rightwingsparkle is no longer permitted to give John McCain hand-love in more than one thread per week. "unless she's brought enough for the whole class."

4. This one's pretty important: No one can ever fucking tell me "It's fucking Old" ever fucking again.

5. All further spelling and factual corrections shall come discretely via a polite email, and there shall be no public mocking of my stupidity.

6. WickedPinto must give a CONTENT WARNING announcing "I'm about to get seriously weird here, guys" before launching into one of his six thousand word opuses on banging Okinawan whores while simultaneously installing an air-ram on his 1964 Chevy Chevelle.

7. LauraW: Enough with the cats already.

8. Lastly: To make up for the banning of the terms "dhimmitude" and "taq'iya" at Dean's World, all commenters are required to work them into at least one (1) comment per day.

Good times, good times.

Posted by: Maetenloch at 06:04 PM | Comments (965)
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