Happy Thanksgiving all. I hope everyone had some good food and good times with friends and family. Personally I've always found that I could love my family a lot more along with some rum and coke. Whiskey if certain branches show up. And of course the same is probably true of your fellow ONT sub-morons.

Remembering the Great Cincinnati Turkey Drop
Oh the humanity. A day that will live in infamy at the Pinedale shopping center. And when I saw this as kid, it was my first inkling that well maybe turkeys can't fly. You can see more here and the entire episode here.

Posted by: Open Blog at 06:00 PM | Comments (392)
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The Marines don't want to specifically buy AC-130 gunships. They have a lot of KC-130J tankers -- the same basic plane as the "Spooky" -- so they're arming up their tankers on the fly to turn them into gunships as needed.

They're adding the Spooky's cannon, the Bushmaster MK44. Here's video of it, or, actually, an upgraded 30mm version of it with airburst capability.

Thanks to rdbrewer.

Posted by: Ace at 02:42 PM | Comments (99)
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I just got word that our emails, too, had been hacked. Possibly by a "whistleblower."

Since they're all coming out, I guess the only option I have is to "get in front of the story" and disclose them myself.

Note that any time we seem to be saying something conspiratorial, or insulting about you, it's "taken out of context," and who can remember the context of emails written three days ago? more...

Posted by: Ace at 02:13 PM | Comments (80)
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The other day Dave in Texas referenced the Jefferson Quote Caper. If you've never read it, it's worth a read. It's maximum pwnage of a troll, the best pwning of a troll I've ever witnessed. (Well... maybe Dave's Antarctica Now pwnage competes with it.) UPDATE [DiT]: Here's Antarctica Now.

The basic backstory is that Dave, to yank a troll's chains, quoted Thomas Jefferson, to reply to the troll's claims about free speech. The Jefferson quote Dave provided was "Free speech is overrated."

The troll -- Jersey, he called himself -- objected that this wasn't a real quote, demonstrating some true genius is solving this particular mystery.

Dave, very politely, insisted it was, and endeavored to help the troll find it online and in books.

It was, as Dave said about the pie chart email linked yesterday, the politeness and helpfulness on Dave's part that made it funny. No matter how angry the troll got about this "quote," Dave just kept his cool and tried to help him track it down, to prove to himself it was real.

Now, what happened was this: We were all kind of laughing about this, trying to keep it secret, trying to not let the troll know that Dave was just jerking his chains with what was obviously a joke. Commenters joined in and began creating their own "quotes" by famous people, even more ridiculous than Dave's.

I thought the joke was blown at that point. Now, surely, the troll "Jersey" must understand it's all a goof.

But he didn't. He kept demanding Dave provide citations for his Jefferson quote -- "Free speech is overrated" -- which Dave very politely and sweetly continued to do.

So: In this post, I collected up the beginnings of this exchange, because I thought it was so funny. And also, because I believed at this point, the joke was over, and obviously Jersey must now understand that Dave was just jerking him around.

That's what I thought.

But then Jersey popped into this thread, which is all about goofing on him for not getting it was a goof in the first place, at post 161, and continues hounding Dave for proof of the quote, in which Jefferson uses the oddly-modern word "overrated."

Dave just keeps sweetly trying to help him track it down and resolve this dispute to everyone's satisfaction.

So I posted again: collecting up the new arguments about the quote. Including Dave's assertion that the quote comes from the famous book of quotations, Stuff Jefferson Said, 3rd Edition.

You still can't find it Jersey?

Wow. I would have thought it would be pretty easy. I don't have an online reference, but if I get some time later today I'll see what I can find. I actually copied it out of one of my college history books, Stuff Jefferson Said, 3rd. edition. You might be able to find it on Amazon. Here, try "www.amazon.com" and search on "Stuff Jefferson Said".

I'll bet there's a newer version in publication now, so leave out "3rd edition."

And this time, I step in to "resolve" the issue. I claim I have myself consulted my own dog-eared copy of Stuff Jefferson Said (3rd Edition, of course, the most complete version), and that I have found the real Jefferson quote, which Dave must have garbled a bit:

"Of all the Necessities of a Prudent & Effective Government, the Virtue & Wisdom of the People is paramount. Free Speech is Nice & Everything, but really, it's No Big Shakes in the Greater Scheme of Things." -- Thomas Jefferson

Surely, this time, "Jersey" now understood that everyone was just goofing on him. "Overrated"? And now "No Great Shakes"? The joke was over; now I had made it obvious we were making stuff up.

But no, the joke is far from over. Jersey shows up in the second thread goofing on him for failing to get he was being goofed on -- to continue badgering Dave, this time for getting the quote so wrong. I offered him an even more absurd quote, and Jersey just didn't pick up on it -- the only thing that mattered to him now was that I had myself "proven" that Dave got the quote wrong, and that Jersey, therefore, was "right."

Dave attempts to apologize for leading Jersey astray:

I looked at my copy of Stuff Jefferson Said, and you're right, it wasn't a campaign speech in Weehawken. So I totally messed that up.

I was working from memory.

Jersey refuses his apology and mocks him further. I mean, Dave really kind of took liberties with the "real" quote, didn't he?

Sooooooooo, this is the actual quote.

"Of all the Necessities of a Prudent & Effective Government, the Virtue & Wisdom of the People is paramount. Free Speech is Nice & Everything, but really, it's No Big Shakes in the Greater Scheme of Things." -- Thomas Jefferson

Opposed to: "Free speech is overrated, but not overtly so".

And only after three days and over 100 postings, blasting me for just being able to understand Dave or where to find hs "quote."

Geeeez, Dave, wasn't your translation just a tad on the loose side? I mean, why not just edit and change it to this:

"Speech really, big shakes of things."

Dave apologizes again, and seeks forgiveness:

C'mon Jersey, you gotta admit, "overrated" and "it's No Big Shakes in the Greater Scheme of Things " are pretty close.

Cut me a little slack dude, I haven't read that in like, 25 years.

I apologized myself, and tried to calm Jersey down about Dave's "mistake:"

Jersey,

Hey, it happens. I appreciate your frustration. But sometimes it takes time to track down an exact quote.

I hope you're satisfied now, and this argument can end. Hopefully with no bad feelings on either side.

Like Thomas Jefferson said, "That's why God gave pencils erasers!"

By this point the entire site is now manufacturing quotes left and right and attributing them to sources of dubious authority.

And Jersey would still not comprehend that out of 100 people, 99 were in on a joke and he wasn't -- at least not for several hours later, when people just told him that these ridiculous quotes from Abraham Lincoln and James Madison and Aaron Burr might sort of all be just completely made up.

At that point he of course claimed he knew it all along. And he was, um, pwning us or something.

Posted by: Ace at 01:11 PM | Comments (86)
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Bellies full and crowded by kin, I hope.

I'd like to thank everyone for making this site what it is. I often kind of hate my job, until I realize what a kind of bizarrely awesome job it is. And I have all of you to thank for that. Especially those that hit the tip jar, and basically keep a roof over my head. And all the commenters, generally acknowledged to be (I hear this all the time from other bloggers) the sharpest and funniest on the 'net.

Thank you all.

Posted by: Ace at 12:59 PM | Comments (76)
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UPDATE5[PA] Drudge picks up the Aussie MP resignations story

UPDATE4[PA] We have curious allies: Alex Jones's PrisonPlanet runs a piece bashing Al Gore for photoshop deceptions and declaring global warming a crock.

UPDATE3[PA] Aussie politics in turmoil over Liberal party resignations over their version of Cap/Trade. Some of the liberals broke ranks and resigned over it(i.e. they thought it was a crap bill) PART 1(the resignations), PART 2(Turnbull doubles down on stupid).

One can't help but wonder if this wave of protest resignations wasn't influenced in some small way by the CRU revelations even if that wasn't explicitly stated. Smart politicians thinking some years down the road, might see being on the wrong side of this as a career killer, and being on the right side as a way to catapult careers to the top. Imprudent politicians, like Turnbull, double down on stupid risking it all on one throw of a die that might not be loaded quite they way they though thought it was loaded. Time will tell.

UPDATE2[PA] Some significant "fishiness" has been found in the code.

UPDATE1. Explanation released. Adjustments were made to compensate for changes in the physical locations of sensing stations. Strangely (no, not really), they only agreed to release one example of the specific methodology & data used to determine the direction & magnitude of the changes. I'm seeing a pattern here, and it's not so much a pattern of climate as of obsfucation.

Follow the above link for a full treatment on the update. Investigate Magazine does a nice job explaining why the single example given is questionable, albeit NIWA's best hope of making the issue go away. I imagine the vast majority of other changes are of even more dubious quality.

ALSO, if you are looking for a quick, easy-to-read summarization of the CRU scandal to pass along to friends & family with short attention spans, Lon @ Commission Impossible has a nice primer: Men Behaving Badly.

-----

On the heels of the unfolding CRU scandal, Investigate Magazine reports that a similar one is unfolding in New Zealand.

It is a familiar story.

New Zealand's Climate advisory panel - The National Institute of Water & Atmospheric Research (NIWA) - produced a graph showing a dramatic 20th century warming trend. The author of the graph, one Dr. Salinger, created the his version of the infamous "Hockey Stick" in the 80's while he worked at none other than the CRU at University of East Anglia.

more...

Posted by: Open Blog at 06:32 AM | Comments (295)
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Tareq Salahi and his wife Michaele slipped through White House security last Tuesday night to attend an official state dinner they were not invited to. The couple then brazenly shared chick peas and Granache wine with President Obama, the First Lady, and Vice President Biden.

The Secret Service is looking into its security procedures after determining that the Virginia couple managed to slip into Tuesday nightÂ’s event even though they were not on the guest list, agency spokesman Ed Donovan said.

President Barack Obama was never in any danger because the Salahis went through the same security screening for weapons as the 300-plus people actually invited to the dinner honoring Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh, Donovan said.

The spokesman further noted that "guests had no access to cutlery, silverware, or glassware at the event"

The Secret Service learned of the security breach after the couple posted pictures of the adventure on their Facebook page.

Posted by: Open Blog at 04:47 AM | Comments (105)
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NFL games today so don't forget to make your picks. Green Bay and Detroit first up today, the Oakland and Dallas. Oh yeah, Huckleberry reminded me there's a game tonight on the NFL network, Giant and Broncos.

Remember if you don't think too good, don't think too long. I plan to make my picks for this week in about 37 seconds. For some reason a half a minute feels strangely familiar to me, like an old friend.

Texas and Texas A&M tonight at 8 EST.

Travel safely, eat good stuff, try to stay out of trouble you goofballs.

UPDATE: Several morons adding their thoughts on thankfulness in the comments. Good idea. Me, I'm enjoying the day with my kids, also thinking about those who are deployed and away from those they love. God keep them safe. Also those who, for various reasons, this time of year can be difficult. more...

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 04:25 AM | Comments (72)
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Good evening morons! I hope all of you are ready for Turkey Day and visiting family. And just to get to get you in the mood for it, here's a little family-time video. Good times, good times.

Some Classic Carol Burnett Show
It's Mama's birthday and sister Ellen is coming to visit. Part 2 is here where you find out what Eunice got Mama.

Posted by: Open Blog at 06:00 PM | Comments (1227)
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This guy David cracks me up by responding to his angry emailer's request for uncompensated work with a combination of ridicule and humor, but mostly polite language. I like how Simon walks the tightrope between outrage and begging, danging the promise of future compensation or greater fortune from his brilliant business idea.

It's the politeness that always gets me. A long time ago I had a run in here with a troll who kept taking the bait from me because he a) was convinced I was a moron and was completely wrong about a quote from Thomas Jefferson (that I completely made up), and b) kept getting angier because I was just so darned nice to him and did not oblige his need to "prove me wrong".

Good times, good times.

Anyway I'm a sucker for this sort of thing. Enjoy. For those of you morons on the move today or tomorrow, safe travels, and a happy Thanksgiving to you all.

tip via mesablue mesa in Texas* over at the Hostages

* recent immigrant

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 05:18 PM | Comments (121)
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